and_o passion_n under_o a_o constant_a watch_n and_o obedience_n to_o god_n and_o know_v first_o whether_o god_n command_v they_o and_o allow_v they_o §_o 7._o and_o this_o history_n may_v teach_v we_o that_o though_o god_n usual_o begin_v as_o be_v say_v our_o conversion_n in_o fear_n and_o penitent_a sorrow_n it_o be_v holy_a and_o heavenly_a joy_n which_o it_o tend_v to_o as_o more_o desirable_a and_o we_o shall_v chief_o seek_v and_o shall_v labour_v to_o moderate_a fear_n and_o sorrow_n and_o not_o think_v we_o can_v never_o have_v enough_o it_o be_v too_o common_a a_o error_n with_o honest_a soul_n to_o think_v that_o a_o hard_a heart_n lie_v most_o in_o want_n of_o sorrow_n and_o tear_n when_o as_o it_o lie_v most_o in_o want_n of_o a_o tractable_a compliance_n and_o yield_v to_o the_o command_n and_o will_v of_o god_n and_o in_o a_o iron_n neck_n and_o obstinate_a disobedience_n to_o god_n and_o to_o think_v that_o a_o new_a and_o tender_a heart_n be_v principal_o a_o heart_n that_o can_v weep_v and_o mourn_v when_o it_o be_v chief_o a_o heart_n that_o easy_o receive_v all_o the_o impression_n of_o god_n command_n and_o promise_n and_o threat_n and_o easy_o yield_v to_o his_o know_a will_n §_o 8._o and_o this_o may_v great_o warn_v we_o to_o fear_v and_o avoid_v self-willedness_a i_o mean_v a_o will_n of_o our_o own_o that_o run_v before_o the_o will_n of_o god_n and_o be_v too_o much_o set_v on_o any_o thing_n which_o god_n have_v not_o promise_v and_o know_v not_o how_o to_o bear_v a_o frustration_n or_o denial_n but_o say_v as_o rachel_n give_v it_o i_o or_o i_o die_v we_o must_v learn_v to_o follow_v and_o not_o to_o lead_v and_o to_o say_v the_o will_n of_o the_o lord_n be_v do_v not_o my_o lord_n but_o thou_o and_o in_o every_o estate_n to_o be_v content_a there_o be_v no_o rest_n but_o in_o god_n will_n §_o 9_o yet_o this_o tell_v we_o that_o god_n deal_v better_a with_o his_o weak_a servant_n than_o they_o deserve_v and_o turn_v that_o oft_o time_n to_o their_o good_a which_o they_o deserve_v shall_v have_v be_v their_o great_a suffering_n §_o 10._o this_o history_n and_o my_o great_a experience_n say_v that_o there_o be_v a_o friend_n that_o stick_v close_a than_o a_o brother_n prov._n 18._o 24._o and_o that_o it_o be_v god_n spirit_n that_o say_v prov._n 27._o 10._o thy_o own_o friend_n and_o thy_o father_n friend_n forsake_v not_o neither_o go_v into_o thy_o brother_n house_n in_o the_o day_n of_o thy_o calamity_n for_o better_a be_v a_o neighbour_n that_o be_v near_o than_o a_o brother_n that_o be_v far_o off_o §_o 11._o this_o history_n tell_v we_o how_o great_a a_o mercy_n it_o be_v to_o have_v a_o body_n meet_v to_o serve_v the_o soul_n and_o how_o great_a a_o affliction_n to_o have_v a_o unruly_a inclination_n from_o the_o body_n temper_n and_o what_o a_o tyrant_n excessive_a fear_n be_v and_o how_o great_a a_o blessing_n it_o be_v to_o have_v such_o a_o passion_n as_o faith_n can_v rule_v and_o easy_o quiet_a §_o 12._o it_o tell_v you_o also_o how_o manifold_a temptation_n and_o affliction_n god_n servant_n be_v liable_a to_o in_o this_o life_n §_o 13._o and_o it_o tell_v you_o that_o our_o great_a good_a or_o evil_n be_v near_a we_o next_o god_n the_o best_a be_v in_o our_o soul_n and_o there_o be_v the_o worst_a and_o next_o in_o our_o body_n and_o next_o in_o our_o near_a friend_n and_o it_o may_v teach_v all_o to_o expect_v their_o great_a sorrow_n from_o those_o or_o that_o which_o they_o most_o excessive_o love_v and_o from_o who_o they_o have_v the_o high_a expectation_n only_a god_n can_v be_v love_v more_o than_o he_o deserve_v sorrow_n begin_v in_o inordinate_a love_n and_o joy_n in_o good_a §_o 14._o and_o it_o tell_v we_o that_o god_n service_n lie_v more_o in_o deed_n than_o in_o word_n my_o dear_a wife_n be_v faulty_a indeed_o in_o talk_v so_o little_a of_o religion_n in_o company_n expect_v it_o be_v unresistible_o to_o confute_v in_o few_o word_n a_o opposer_n or_o revile_a of_o 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i_o be_v sensible_a of_o my_o neglect_n of_o it_o and_o now_o here_o be_v comfort_n that_o i_o have_v to_o deal_v with_o a_o god_n of_o mercy_n that_o will_v hear_v a_o poor_a repent_a sinner_n a_o god_n that_o will_v in_o no_o wise_a cast_v out_o those_o that_o come_v to_o he_o but_o love_v who_o he_o love_v to_o the_o end_n this_o be_v the_o god_n who_o i_o have_v choose_v and_o take_v for_o my_o portion_n the_o same_o god_n be_v his_o god_n his_o guide_n and_o comforter_n the_o whole_a world_n be_v but_o a_o house_n where_o god_n child_n dwell_v a_o little_a while_n till_o he_o have_v fit_v they_o for_o the_o heavenly_a mansion_n and_o if_o he_o send_v they_o out_o of_o one_o room_n into_o another_o to_o do_v his_o work_n and_o try_v their_o obedience_n and_o if_o he_o put_v some_o in_o the_o dark_a corner_n of_o his_o house_n to_o keep_v they_o humble_a though_o he_o separate_v those_o that_o be_v most_o belove_v of_o each_o other_o it_o be_v but_o that_o they_o may_v not_o love_v 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will_v do_v more_o against_o it_o than_o many_o year_n secret_a trouble_n and_o dejection_n alone_o will_v do_v 3._o if_o it_o be_v doubt_n of_o your_o sincerity_n and_o grace_n why_o do_v you_o refuse_v to_o reason_v the_o case_n and_o say_v what_o it_o be_v that_o persuade_v you_o that_o you_o be_v graceless_a that_o we_o may_v try_v it_o by_o the_o word_n of_o god_n what_o evidence_n be_v it_o that_o you_o want_v you_o have_v confess_v that_o sometime_o you_o be_v convince_v of_o sincerity_n and_o can_v you_o so_o easy_o deny_v what_o you_o have_v find_v as_o to_o conclude_v yourself_o so_o miserable_a as_o you_o do_v shall_v all_o do_v
godliness_n as_o they_o come_v and_o such_o as_o be_v true_o convert_v with_o we_o she_o love_v as_o child_n §_o 16._o one_o infirmity_n make_v she_o faulty_a in_o the_o omission_n of_o much_o of_o her_o duty_n she_o be_v wont_a to_o say_v that_o she_o have_v from_o her_o childhood_n imprint_v a_o deep_a fear_n and_o hatred_n of_o hypocrisy_n on_o her_o mind_n that_o she_o can_v never_o do_v the_o outside_n of_o her_o duty_n as_o to_o the_o speak_a part_n for_o fear_v of_o hypocrisy_n i_o scarce_o ever_o meet_v with_o a_o person_n that_o be_v able_a to_o speak_v long_o for_o matter_n and_o good_a language_n without_o repetition_n even_o about_o religious_a thing_n and_o few_o that_o have_v more_o desire_n that_o it_o be_v well_o do_v and_o yet_o she_o can_v not_o do_v it_o herself_o for_o fear_n of_o seem_v to_o be_v guilty_a of_o ostentation_n in_o good_a company_n she_o will_v speak_v little_a of_o that_o which_o she_o most_o desire_a to_o hear_v when_o i_o be_v at_o any_o time_n from_o home_n she_o will_v not_o pray_v in_o the_o family_n though_o she_o can_v not_o endure_v to_o be_v without_o it_o she_o will_v private_o talk_v to_o the_o servant_n and_o read_v good_a book_n to_o they_o most_o of_o the_o open_a speak_a part_n of_o religion_n she_o omit_v through_o a_o disease_a enmity_n to_o ostentation_n and_o hypocrisy_n but_o of_o late_a year_n when_o she_o see_v i_o and_o other_o too_o spare_v in_o profitable_a speech_n to_o young_a and_o ignorant_a people_n she_o confess_v that_o she_o see_v her_o error_n and_o that_o even_o a_o hypocrite_n use_v but_o the_o word_n and_o outside_n of_o religion_n be_v better_a to_o other_o than_o silence_n and_o unprofitable_a omission_n be_v §_o 17._o her_o houshold-affair_n she_o order_v with_o so_o so_o great_a skill_n and_o decency_n as_o that_o other_o much_o praise_v that_o which_o i_o be_v no_o fit_a judge_n of_o i_o have_v be_v breed_v among_o plain_a mean_a people_n and_o i_o think_v that_o so_o much_o wash_v of_o stair_n and_o room_n to_o keep_v they_o as_o clean_o as_o their_o trencher_n and_o dish_n and_o so_o much_o ado_n about_o cleanliness_n and_o trifle_n be_v a_o sinful_a curiosity_n and_o expense_n of_o servant_n time_n who_o may_v that_o while_n have_v be_v read_v some_o good_a book_n but_o she_o that_o be_v otherwise_o breed_v have_v somewhat_o other_o thought_n §_o 18._o her_o great_a tender_a impatiency_n lie_v much_o in_o her_o ear_n she_o can_v not_o bear_v without_o great_a reason_n a_o dispute_a contradiction_n nor_o yet_o to_o hear_v sad_a tiding_n nor_o any_o hard_a prognostic_n and_o it_o be_v because_o she_o feel_v the_o weakness_n of_o her_o own_o head_n and_o for_o twenty_o year_n live_v in_o too_o great_a fear_n of_o the_o overthrow_n of_o her_o understanding_n and_o i_o be_v apt_a to_o think_v it_o be_v but_o a_o passionate_a fanciful_a fear_n and_o be_v too_o apt_a to_o be_v impatient_a with_o her_o impatiency_n and_o with_o every_o trouble_n of_o her_o mind_n not_o enough_o consider_v how_o great_a tenderness_n in_o all_o our_o discourse_n she_o need_v though_o i_o remember_v nothing_o else_o that_o ever_o i_o show_v impatience_n to_o she_o in_o but_o ever_o since_o her_o first_o danger_n and_o strong_a affection_n i_o can_v hardly_o bear_v any_o signification_n of_o her_o displeasure_n and_o discontent_n and_o she_o be_v wont_v oft_o to_o say_v it_o be_v a_o great_a mercy_n of_o god_n not_o to_o know_v what_o will_v befall_v we_o in_o this_o world_n nor_o how_o we_o shall_v be_v sick_a or_o suffer_v or_o die_v that_o our_o foreknowledge_n may_v not_o anticipate_v our_o sorrow_n though_o in_o the_o general_n we_o shall_v be_v always_o ready_a §_o 19_o she_o be_v the_o great_a honourer_n of_o her_o mother_n and_o most_o sincere_o love_v she_o that_o ever_o i_o know_v a_o child_n do_v to_o a_o parent_n she_o believe_v the_o promise_n of_o the_o five_o commandment_n and_o believe_v that_o it_o do_v imply_v a_o answerable_a curse_n to_o they_o that_o break_v it_o and_o that_o as_o honour_v parent_n have_v even_o the_o promise_n of_o blessing_n on_o earth_n so_o the_o dishonour_v they_o be_v like_a to_o bring_v a_o curse_n upon_o the_o person_n or_o family_n that_o be_v guilty_a of_o it_o and_o that_o how_o great_a soever_o their_o present_a prosperity_n may_v seem_v it_o be_v come_v and_o will_v overtake_v they_o either_o in_o their_o body_n child_n or_o estate_n prov._n 30._o 17._o the_o eye_n that_o mock_v at_o his_o father_n and_o despise_v to_o obey_v his_o mother_n the_o raven_n of_o the_o valley_n shall_v pick_v it_o out_o and_o the_o young_a eagle_n shall_v eat_v it_o and_o such_o by_o moses_n law_n be_v to_o be_v put_v to_o death_n deut._n 27._o 16._o curse_a be_v he_o that_o set_v light_n by_o his_o father_z or_o his_o mother_n and_o let_v all_z the_o people_z say_v amen_o and_o will_v god_n suspend_v it_o till_o the_o sinner_n say_v amen_o o_o no._n and_o what_o be_v that_o person_n case_v that_o live_v under_o this_o curse_n of_o god_n if_o the_o body_n escape_v it_o and_o posterity_n escape_v it_o and_o the_o estate_n escape_v it_o yea_o and_o a_o sear_a conscience_n escape_v it_o few_o year_n the_o soul_n will_v not_o escape_v it_o for_o ever_o without_o deep_a and_o through_o repentance_n for_o christ_n have_v redeem_v none_o but_o sincere_a penitent_n from_o the_o curse_n yea_o even_o such_o seldom_o escape_v the_o temporal_a sharp_a chastisement_n and_o very_o worthy_a be_v her_o mother_n of_o her_o love_n and_o honour_n all_o her_o letter_n to_o she_o when_o she_o be_v from_o home_n i_o find_v now_o lay_v up_o by_o she_o as_o a_o treasure_n sure_a i_o will_v transcribe_v part_n of_o some_o of_o they_o that_o you_o may_v perceive_v her_o plain_a and_o honest_a care_n of_o her_o child_n soul_n §_o 20._o in_o one_o 1657._o to_o this_o daughter_n at_o oxford_n she_o write_v thus_o i_o can_v but_o put_v you_o in_o mind_n of_o your_o duty_n you_o owe_v to_o god_n i_o mean_v that_o you_o see_v that_o you_o lose_v not_o your_o time_n if_o you_o be_v where_o you_o may_v improve_v your_o time_n for_o grace_n and_o get_v down_o sin_n i_o shall_v give_v you_o my_o consent_n for_o your_o stay_n with_o her_o brother_n upton_n canon_n of_o christ_n church_n but_o be_v sure_a you_o do_v not_o deceive_v yourself_o herein_o for_o god_n will_v not_o be_v mock_v he_o that_o do_v righteous_o and_o live_v to_o christ_n shall_v enjoy_v all_o the_o blessing_n promise_v by_o god_n to_o they_o that_o trust_v he_o and_o obey_v he_o i_o bless_v my_o god_n i_o have_v my_o health_n as_o well_o as_o i_o can_v wish_v and_o my_o heart_n run_v out_o whole_o to_o god_n in_o seek_v a_o blessing_n for_o child_n and_o child_n child_n o_o that_o i_o may_v prevail_v by_o prayer_n to_o see_v such_o hope_n of_o you_o all_o upon_o good_a ground_n as_o will_v be_v a_o gracious_a return_n to_o my_o prayer_n this_o be_v my_o work_n be_v not_o you_o want_v to_o yourselves_o your_o endeavour_n and_o prayer_n also_o be_v necessary_a who_o know_v but_o god_n will_v give_v you_o that_o one_o thing_n necessary_a which_o if_o you_o shall_v make_v it_o your_o chief_a choice_n shall_v never_o be_v take_v from_o you_o let_v the_o word_n of_o god_n dwell_v plentiful_o in_o you_o that_o it_o may_v be_v the_o rule_n of_o your_o life_n which_o be_v the_o prayer_n of_o your_o true_o love_v mother_n mary_n hanmer_n §_o 21._o in_o another_o 1657._o thus_o i_o know_v not_o why_o you_o shall_v write_v in_o tear_n because_o of_o a_o apprehension_n of_o my_o displeasure_n and_o that_o you_o can_v see_v it_o at_o so_o great_a a_o distance_n be_v strange_a to_o i_o if_o your_o information_n be_v of_o god_n to_o who_o you_o appeal_v look_v to_o it_o if_o of_o man_n believe_v it_o not_o many_o false_a fear_n may_v arise_v for_o want_v of_o the_o true_a fear_n of_o offend_v a_o good_a and_o gracious_a god_n all_o your_o fear_n and_o all_o your_o joy_n must_v be_v found_v in_o he_o or_o else_o your_o life_n here_o will_v be_v very_o uncomfortable_a have_v not_o i_o my_o comfort_n from_o my_o god_n and_o not_o only_o in_o the_o creature_n i_o have_v sink_v long_o since_o and_o often_o in_o despair_n take_v my_o experience_n or_o rather_o hear_v the_o word_n of_o god_n which_o say_v it_o be_v better_a to_o trust_v in_o god_n than_o to_o put_v confidence_n in_o riches_n it_o be_v better_a to_o trust_v in_o god_n than_o to_o put_v confidence_n in_o man_n be_v well_o acquaint_v with_o the_o will_n of_o god_n and_o be_v sure_a in_o all_o thing_n to_o please_v he_o and_o then_o all_o other_o care_n and_o fear_n will_v be_v of_o no_o value_n to_o you_o o_o let_v it_o be_v
to_o supply_v the_o notorious_a necessity_n of_o the_o people_n and_o as_o helper_n of_o the_o allow_a ministry_n the_o good_a woman_n think_v this_o have_v be_v read_v the_o common-prayer_n and_o in_o a_o letter_n which_o i_o now_o find_v accuse_v my_o wife_n with_o five_o or_o six_o vehement_a charge_n for_o tell_v she_o i_o will_v not_o read_v 〈◊〉_d common-prayer_n my_o wife_n be_v of_o my_o mind_n for_o the_o matter_n but_o great_o offend_v with_o i_o for_o seem_v to_o do_v it_o for_o the_o avoid_n of_o danger_n and_o be_v so_o far_o from_o not_o pardon_v these_o false_a smart_a accusation_n that_o she_o never_o once_o blame_v the_o good_a woman_n but_o love_v she_o tender_v she_o and_o relieve_v she_o in_o sickness_n to_o the_o death_n but_o hardly_o forgive_v i_o and_o yet_o draw_v i_o from_o all_o other_o place_n if_o the_o minister_n be_v not_o of_o my_o mind_n by_o prudent_a diversity_n much_o less_o do_v her_o suffering_n from_o the_o time_n distemper_v she_o she_o have_v blame_v i_o for_o name_v in_o print_n my_o loss_n imprisonment_n and_o other_o suffering_n by_o the_o bishop_n as_o be_v over_o selfish_a queralousness_n when_o i_o shall_v rather_o with_o wonder_n be_v thankful_a for_o the_o great_a mercy_n we_o yet_o enjoy_v though_o i_o think_v i_o never_o mention_v they_o as_o over-sensible_a of_o the_o suffering_n but_o as_o a_o necessary_a evince_a of_o the_o nature_n of_o the_o cause_n and_o as_o part_v of_o the_o necessary_a history_n or_o matter_n of_o fact_n in_o order_n to_o decide_v it_o she_z as_o much_o dislike_v the_o silence_v of_o the_o minister_n as_o any_o but_o she_o do_v not_o love_v to_o hear_v it_o much_o complain_v of_o save_v as_o the_o public_a loss_n nor_o to_o hear_v conformist_n talk_v against_o as_o a_o party_n nor_o the_o fault_n of_o the_o conscientious_a sort_n of_o they_o aggravate_v in_o a_o side_a factious_a manner_n but_o 1._o she_o be_v prone_a to_o overlove_v her_o relation_n and_o those_o good_a people_n poor_a as_o much_o as_o rich_a who_o she_o think_v most_o upright_o the_o love_n be_v good_a but_o the_o degree_n be_v too_o passionate_a 2._o she_o over-earnest_o desire_v their_o spiritual_a welfare_n if_o these_o who_o she_o overloved_n have_v not_o be_v as_o good_a and_o do_v as_o well_o as_o she_o will_v have_v they_o in_o innocent_a behaviour_n in_o piety_n and_o if_o rich_a in_o liberality_n it_o over-troubled_n she_o and_o she_o can_v not_o bear_v it_o 3._o she_o be_v apt_a when_o she_o set_v her_o mind_n and_o heart_n upon_o some_o good_a work_n which_o she_o count_v great_a or_o the_o welfare_n of_o some_o dear_a friend_n to_o be_v too_o much_o please_v in_o her_o expectation_n and_o self-made_a promise_n of_o the_o success_n and_o then_o almost_o overturn_v with_o trouble_n when_o they_o disappoint_v she_o and_o she_o too_o impatient_o bear_v unkindness_n from_o the_o friend_n that_o be_v most_o dear_a to_o she_o or_o who_o she_o have_v much_o oblige_v her_o will_n be_v set_v upon_o good_a but_o her_o weakness_n can_v not_o bear_v the_o cross_n or_o frustration_n of_o it_o §_o 12._o but_o the_o great_a infirmity_n which_o tyrannize_v over_o she_o be_v a_o disease_a fearfulness_n against_o which_o she_o have_v little_o more_o free_a will_n or_o power_n than_o a_o man_n in_o a_o ague_n or_o frost_n against_o shake_v cold_a her_o nature_n be_v prone_a to_o it_o and_o i_o say_v before_o abundance_n of_o sad_a accident_n make_v that_o and_o trouble_v of_o mind_n her_o malady_n beside_o as_o she_o say_v four_o time_n in_o danger_n of_o death_n 2._o and_o the_o storm_a of_o her_o mother_n house_n by_o soldier_n fire_v part_n kill_v plunder_v and_o threaten_v the_o rest_n 3._o the_o awakening_n of_o her_o conversion_n 4._o the_o sentence_n of_o death_n by_o sickness_n present_o before_o her_o peace_n be_v settle_v 5._o the_o fire_n next_o her_o lodging_n in_o sweetings-alley_n 6._o the_o burn_a of_o a_o merchant_n his_o wife_n and_o family_n in_o lothbury_n overagainst_a her_o brother_n vpton_n door_n 7._o the_o common_a terror_n and_o confusion_n at_o dunstan_n church_n in_o fleetstreet_n when_o they_o think_v the_o church_n be_v fall_v on_o their_o head_n while_o i_o be_v preach_v and_o the_o people_n cast_v themselves_o down_o from_o the_o gallery_n 8._o her_o mother_n death_n 9_o the_o friendless_a state_n she_o think_v she_o be_v then_o leave_v in_o 10._o the_o great_a plague_n 11._o the_o burn_v of_o london_n 12._o the_o crack_n and_o danger_n of_o her_o chamber_n in_o aldersgate_n street_n 13._o the_o crack_n and_o confusion_n at_o st._n jame_n market-house_n 14._o the_o many_o fire_n and_o talk_n of_o fire_v since_o 15._o the_o common_a rumour_n of_o murdering_n and_o massacre_n 16._o the_o death_n and_o danger_n of_o many_o of_o her_o friend_n and_o my_o own_o illness_n more_o than_o all_o these_o concur_v to_o make_v fear_n and_o aptness_n to_o be_v trouble_v to_o be_v her_o disease_n so_o that_o she_o much_o dream_v of_o fire_n and_o murderer_n and_o her_o own_o dream_n work_v half_a as_o dangerous_o on_o she_o as_o reality_n so_o that_o she_o can_v not_o bear_v the_o clap_v of_o a_o door_n or_o any_o thing_n that_o have_v suddenness_n noise_n or_o fierceness_n in_o it_o but_o all_o this_o be_v more_o the_o malady_n of_o her_o body_n than_o of_o her_o soul_n and_o i_o account_v have_v little_a moral_a guilt_n and_o i_o take_v it_o for_o a_o evidence_n of_o the_o power_n of_o grace_n that_o so_o timorous_a a_o person_n 1._o have_v overcome_v most_o of_o her_o fear_n of_o hell_n and_o god_n desertion_n 2._o and_o be_v more_o fearless_a of_o persecution_n imprisonment_n or_o loss_n and_o poverty_n thereby_o than_o i_o or_o any_o that_o i_o remember_v to_o have_v know_v §_o 13._o and_o though_o her_o spirit_n be_v so_o quick_a and_o she_o so_o apt_a to_o be_v trouble_v at_o man_n sin_n who_o she_o much_o love_v she_o great_o differ_v from_o i_o in_o her_o bear_n with_o they_o and_o carriage_n towards_o they_o 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least_o fault_n than_o i_o do_v and_o be_v more_o desirous_a of_o their_o great_a innocency_n and_o exactness_n §_o 14._o indeed_o she_o be_v so_o much_o for_o calmness_n deliberation_n and_o do_v nothing_o rash_o and_o in_o haste_n and_o my_o condition_n and_o business_n as_o well_o as_o temper_v make_v i_o do_v and_o speak_v much_o so_o sudden_o that_o she_o principal_o differ_v from_o i_o and_o blame_v i_o in_o this_o every_o considerable_a case_n and_o business_n she_o will_v have_v i_o take_v time_n to_o think_v much_o of_o before_o i_o do_v it_o or_o speak_v or_o resolve_v of_o any_o thing_n i_o know_v the_o counsel_n be_v good_a for_o one_o that_o can_v stay_v but_o not_o for_o one_o that_o must_v ride_v post_n i_o think_v still_o i_o have_v but_o a_o little_a time_n to_o live_v i_o think_v some_o considerable_a work_n still_o call_v for_o haste_n i_o have_v these_o forty_o year_n be_v sensible_a of_o the_o sin_n of_o lose_v time_n i_o can_v not_o spare_v a_o hour_n i_o think_v i_o can_v understand_v the_o matter_n in_o question_n as_o well_o at_o a_o few_o thought_n as_o in_o many_o day_n and_o yet_o she_o that_o have_v less_o work_n and_o more_o leisure_n but_o a_o far_o quick_a apprehension_n than_o i_o be_v all_o for_o stay_v to_o consider_v and_o against_o haste_n and_o eagerness_n in_o almost_o every_o thing_n and_o notwithstanding_o she_o over_o quick_a and_o feel_a temper_n be_v all_o for_o mildness_n calmness_n gentleness_n pleasingness_n and_o serenity_n §_o 15._o she_o have_v a_o earnest_a desire_n of_o the_o conversion_n and_o salvation_n of_o her_o servant_n and_o be_v great_o trouble_v that_o so_o many_o of_o they_o though_o tolerable_a in_o their_o work_n go_v away_o ignorant_a or_o strange_a to_o true_a
duty_n for_o they_o beside_o the_o time_n and_o perhaps_o care_v thought_n that_o all_o his_o family_n expense_n and_o affair_n will_v require_v and_o then_o it_o will_v disquiet_v a_o man_n mind_n to_o think_v that_o he_o must_v neglect_v his_o family_n or_o his_o flock_n and_o have_v undertake_v more_o than_o he_o can_v do_v my_o conscience_n have_v force_v i_o many_o time_n to_o omit_v secret_a prayer_n with_o my_o wife_n when_o she_o desire_v it_o for_o want_v of_o time_n not_o dare_v to_o omit_v far_o great_a work_n 2._o and_o a_o minister_n can_v scarce_o look_v to_o win_v much_o on_o his_o flock_n if_o he_o be_v not_o able_a to_o oblige_v they_o by_o gift_n of_o charity_n and_o liberality_n and_o a_o marry_a man_n have_v seldom_o any_o thing_n to_o spare_v especial_o if_o he_o have_v child_n that_o must_v be_v provide_v for_o all_o will_v seem_v too_o little_a for_o they_o or_o if_o he_o have_v none_o housekeep_v be_v chargeable_a when_o a_o single_a man_n may_v have_v entertainment_n at_o easy_a rate_n and_o most_o woman_n be_v weak_a and_o apt_a to_o live_v in_o fear_n of_o want_n if_o not_o in_o covetousness_n and_o have_v many_o want_v real_a or_o fancy_v of_o their_o own_o to_o be_v supply_v 3._o in_o a_o word_n st._n paul_n own_o word_n be_v plain_a to_o other_o but_o concern_v minister_n much_o more_o than_o other_o man_n 1_o cor._n 7._o 7_o etc._n etc._n i_o will_v that_o all_o man_n be_v as_o i_o myself_o it_o be_v good_a for_o they_o they_o abide_v even_o as_o i_o 28._o such_o shall_v have_v trouble_n in_o the_o flesh_n 32._o i_o will_v have_v you_o without_o carefulness_n he_o that_o be_v unmarried_a care_v for_o the_o thing_n that_o belong_v to_o the_o lord_n how_o he_o may_v please_v the_o lord_n but_o he_o that_o be_v marry_v care_v for_o the_o thing_n of_o the_o world_n how_o he_o may_v please_v his_o wife_n this_o be_v true_a and_o believe_v it_o both_o care_v for_o the_o thing_n of_o the_o world_n and_o care_v to_o please_v one_o another_o be_v business_n and_o troublesome_a business_n care_v for_o house-rent_n for_o child_n for_o servant_n wage_n for_o food_n and_o raiment_n but_o above_o all_o for_o debt_n be_v very_o troublesome_a thing_n and_o if_o care_v choke_v the_o word_n in_o hearer_n they_o will_v be_v very_o unfit_a for_o the_o mind_n of_o a_o student_n and_o a_o man_n that_o shall_v still_o dwell_v on_o holy_a thing_n and_o the_o please_a of_o a_o wife_n be_v usual_o no_o easy_a task_n there_o be_v a_o unsuitableness_n in_o the_o best_a and_o wise_a and_o like_a face_n be_v not_o so_o unlike_a as_o the_o apprehension_n of_o the_o mind_n they_o that_o agree_v in_o religion_n in_o love_n and_o interest_n yet_o may_v have_v daily_o different_a apprehension_n about_o occasional_a occurrence_n person_n thing_n word_n etc._n etc._n that_o will_v seem_v the_o best_a way_n to_o one_o that_o seem_v worst_a to_o the_o other_o and_o passion_n be_v apt_a to_o succeed_v and_o serve_v these_o difference_n very_o good_a people_n be_v very_o hard_a to_o be_v please_v my_o own_o dear_a wife_n have_v high_a desire_n of_o my_o do_v and_o speak_v better_o than_o i_o do_v but_o my_o badness_n make_v it_o hard_o to_o i_o to_o do_v better_o but_o this_o be_v my_o benefit_n for_o it_o be_v but_o to_o put_v i_o on_o to_o be_v better_a as_o god_n himself_o will_v be_v please_v that_o its_o hard_a to_o please_v god_n and_o holy_a person_n be_v only_o our_o fault_n but_o there_o be_v too_o many_o that_o will_v not_o be_v please_v unless_o you_o will_v contribute_v to_o their_o sin_n their_o pride_n their_o wastfulness_n their_o superfluity_n and_o childish_a fancy_n their_o covetousness_n and_o passion_n and_o too_o many_o who_o have_v such_o passion_n that_o it_o require_v great_a skill_n to_o please_v they_o than_o almost_o any_o the_o wise_a can_v attain_v and_o the_o discontent_n and_o displeasure_n of_o one_o that_o be_v so_o near_o you_o will_v be_v as_o thorn_n or_o nettle_n in_o your_o bed_n and_o paul_n conclude_v to_o be_v un-married_n be_v the_o better_a that_o we_o may_v attend_v the_o lord_n without_o distraction_n v._o 35_o 38._o and_o what_o need_v we_o more_o than_o christ_n own_o word_n mat._n 19_o 10_o 11_o 12._o when_o they_o say_v then_o it_o be_v not_o good_a to_o marry_v he_o answer_v all_o man_n can_v receive_v this_o say_n save_v they_o to_o who_o it_o be_v give_v for_o there_o be_v some_o eunuch_n who_o be_v so_o bear_v from_o their_o mother_n womb_n and_o there_o be_v some_o eunuch_n who_o be_v make_v eunuch_n by_o man_n and_o there_o be_v eunuch_n which_o have_v make_v themselves_o eunuch_n for_o the_o kingdom_n of_o heaven_n sake_n he_o that_o be_v able_a to_o receive_v it_o let_v he_o receive_v it_o oh_o how_o many_o sad_a and_o careful_a hour_n may_v many_o a_o minister_n have_v prevent_v and_o how_o much_o more_o good_a may_v he_o have_v do_v if_o be_v under_o no_o necessity_n he_o have_v be_v soon_o wise_a in_o this_o §_o 18._o another_o use_n of_o this_o history_n be_v to_o show_v man_n that_o it_o be_v not_o god_n or_o our_o enemy_n afflict_v we_o in_o worldly_a loss_n or_o suffering_n especial_o when_o we_o suffer_v for_o righteousness_n sake_n which_o be_v half_a so_o painful_a as_o our_o own_o inward_a infirmity_n a_o man_n spirit_n can_v bear_v his_o infirmity_n of_o outward_a cross_n but_o a_o wound_a spirit_n who_o can_v bear_v my_o poor_a wife_n make_v nothing_o of_o prison_n distraining_n reproach_n and_o such_o cross_n but_o her_o burden_n be_v most_o inward_a from_o her_o own_o tenderness_n and_o next_o from_o those_o who_o she_o overloved_n and_o for_o my_o own_o part_n all_o that_o ever_o either_o enemy_n or_o friend_n have_v do_v against_o i_o be_v but_o as_o a_o flea-biting_n to_o i_o in_o comparison_n of_o the_o daily_a burden_n of_o a_o pain_a body_n and_o the_o weakness_n of_o my_o soul_n in_o faith_n hope_n love_n and_o heavenly_a desire_n and_o delight_n §_o 19_o and_o here_o you_o may_v see_v how_o necessary_a patience_n be_v and_o to_o have_v a_o mind_n fortify_v beforehand_o against_o all_o sort_n of_o suffering_n that_o in_o our_o patience_n we_o may_v possess_v our_o soul_n and_o that_o the_o dear_a friend_n must_v expect_v to_o find_v much_o in_o one_o another_o that_o must_v be_v bear_v with_o and_o exercise_v our_o patience_n we_o be_v all_o imperfect_a it_o have_v make_v i_o many_o a_o time_n wonder_v at_o the_o prelate_n that_o can_v think_v it_o the_o way_n to_o the_o concord_n of_o million_o to_o force_v they_o to_o consent_v to_o all_o their_o imposition_n even_o of_o word_n and_o promise_n and_o ceremony_n and_o that_o in_o thing_n where_o conscience_n must_v be_v most_o cautelous_a whereas_o even_o husband_n and_o wife_n master_n and_o servant_n have_v almost_o daily_a difference_n in_o judge_v of_o their_o common_a affair_n §_o 20._o and_o by_o this_o history_n you_o may_v see_v how_o little_a cause_n we_o have_v to_o be_v over-serious_a about_o any_o worldly_a matter_n and_o to_o mind_n and_o do_v they_o with_o too_o much_o intenseness_n of_o affection_n and_o how_o necessary_a it_o be_v to_o possess_v they_o as_o if_o we_o possess_v they_o not_o see_v the_o time_n be_v short_a and_o the_o fashion_n of_o this_o world_n pass_v away_o and_o how_o reasonable_a it_o be_v that_o if_o we_o love_v god_n ourselves_o yea_o or_o our_o friend_n that_o we_o shall_v long_o to_o be_v with_o christ_n where_o they_o be_v far_o more_o amiable_a than_o here_o and_o where_o in_o the_o city_n of_o god_n the_o jerusalem_n above_o we_o shall_v delightful_o dwell_v with_o they_o for_o ever_o whereas_o here_o we_o be_v still_o sure_a to_o stay_v with_o they_o but_o a_o little_a while_n and_o have_v we_o here_o know_v christ_n after_o the_o flesh_n we_o shall_v so_o know_v he_o no_o more_o whereas_o believe_v that_o we_o shall_v soon_o be_v with_o he_o even_o those_o that_o never_o see_v he_o may_v rejoice_v with_o joy_n unspeakable_a and_o full_a of_o glory_n §_o 21._o last_o here_o you_o may_v see_v that_o as_o god_n servant_n have_v not_o their_o portion_n or_o good_a thing_n in_o this_o life_n so_o they_o may_v have_v the_o same_o sickness_n and_o manner_n of_o death_n as_o other_o lazarus_n may_v lie_v and_o die_v in_o his_o sore_n among_o the_o dog_n at_o the_o door_n when_o dives_n may_v have_v a_o pompous_a life_n and_o funeral_n there_o be_v no_o judge_v of_o a_o man_n sincerity_n or_o of_o his_o future_a state_n by_o his_o disease_n or_o by_o his_o disease_a deathbed_n word_n he_o that_o live_v to_o god_n shall_v die_v safe_o into_o the_o hand_n of_o god_n though_o a_o fever_n or_o deliration_n hinder_v he_o from_o know_v this_o till_o experience_n and_o sudden_a possession_n of_o heaven_n convince_v he_o bless_a be_v the_o dead_a that_o die_v in_o the_o lord_n from_o henceforth_o yea_o say_v the_o spirit_n that_o they_o may_v rest_v from_o their_o labour_n and_o their_o work_n do_v follow_v they_o rev._n 14._o 13._o therefore_o in_o our_o great_a strait_n and_o suffering_n let_v we_o comfort_v one_o another_o with_o these_o word_n that_o we_o shall_v for_o ever_o be_v with_o the_o lord_n have_v i_o be_v to_o possess_v the_o company_n of_o my_o friend_n in_o this_o life_n only_o how_o short_a will_v out_o comfortable_a converse_n have_v be_v but_o now_o i_o shall_v live_v with_o they_o in_o the_o heavenly_a city_n of_o god_n for_o ever_o and_o they_o be_v there_o of_o the_o same_o mind_n with_o my_o forgive_a god_n and_o saviour_n will_v forgive_v all_o my_o fail_n neglect_v and_o injury_n as_o god_n forgive_v they_o and_o i_o the_o lord_n give_v and_o the_o lord_n have_v take_v away_o and_o he_o have_v take_v away_o but_o that_o upon_o my_o desert_n which_o he_o have_v give_v i_o undeserved_o near_o nineteen_o year_n bless_a be_v the_o name_n of_o the_o lord_n i_o be_o wait_v to_o be_v next_o the_o door_n be_v open_a death_n will_v quick_o draw_v the_o veil_n and_o make_v we_o see_v how_o near_o we_o be_v to_o god_n and_o one_o another_o and_o do_v not_o sufficient_o know_v it_o farewell_o vain_a world_n and_o welcome_a true_a everlasting_a life_n finis_fw-la