husband forbiddeth 325 52 Of cases wherein a wife ought to forbeare what her husband requireth 328 53 Of wiues faults in shewing more respect to their husbands then to God 329 54 Of the manner of a wiues subiection to her husband 329 55 Of wiues humility in euery duty 331 56 Of wiues pride 331 57 Of wiues sincerity in euery duty 332 58 Of wiues complement all subiection 334 59 Of wiues cheerefulnesse in euery duty 334 60 Of wiues sullen and forced obedience 334 61 Of wiues constancy in doing their duty 335 62 Of wiues repenting their former goodnesse 335 63 Of the extent of a wiues obedience 336 64 Of a wiues labouring to bring her iudgement to the bent of her husbands 337 65 Of wiues ouerweining conceit of their owne wisdome 338 66 Of a wiues yeelding to her husband in such things as she thinketh not to be the meetest 338 67 Of wiues making their owne will their law 339 68 Of care in choosing such husbands as wiues may without griese be subiect vnto 340 69 Of the reasons to moue wiues to doe their duties 341 70 Of an husbands place 342 71 Of an husbands office 343 72 Of the resemblance betwixt Christ and an husband 344 73 Of the benefit which a wife hath by an husband 346 74 Of the example of the Church set before wiues 347 IV. TREATISE Of Husbands particular duties § 1 OF the generall heads of this treatise 349 2 Of that loue which husbands owe their wiues 350 3 Of an husbands hatred and want of loue 352 4 Of an husbands wise maintaining his authority 353 5 Of husbands losing their authority 355 6 Of husbands high account of wiues 356 7 Of that fellowship which is betwixt man and wife notwithstanding a wiues inferiority 357 8 Of husbands too meane account of wiues 358 9 Of husbands good esteeme of their owne wiues 358 10 Of husbands preposterous opinion of their owne wiues 359 11 Of husbands intire affection to their wiues 360 12 Of the stoicall disposition of husbands to their wiues 362 13 Of an husbands kinde acceptance of such things as his wife doth 362 14 Of husbands fleighting and reiecting their wiues goodnesse 363 15 Of husbands courteous accepting their wiues reuerend cariage 364 16 Of husbands ready yeelding to their wiues humble suits 365 17 Of husbands harshnesse to their wiues 365 18 Of husbands forbearing to exact all that they may 366 19 Of husbands too much strictnesse towards their wiues 368 20 Of husbands encouraging their wiues in good things 369 21 Of husbands vngratefull discouraging their wiues 370 22 Of an husbands mildnesse 370 23 Of husbands bitternesse 371 24 Of the titles which an husband giueth to his wife 371 25 Of an husbands manner of instructing his wife 372 26 Of an husbands manner of commanding his wife any thing 373 27 Of an husbands wise cariage when his wife is erroneously scrupulous 375 28 Of an husbands forbearing to presse things vnbeseeming a wiues place 376 29 Of an husbands pressing his authority in weighty matters 376 30 Of husbands too great pride in commanding 377 31 Of husbands rare and milde vsing their commanding power 378 32 Of husbands insolency and peremptorinesse 378 33 Of an husbands reprouing his wife 379 34 Of neglecting reproofe 379 35 Of well ordering reproofe in the matter thereof 379 36 Of vndue reproofe 381 37 Whether an husband may reproue his wife for such things as he is guilty of 382 38 Of well ordering reproofe in the manner thereof 382 39 Of vndiscreet reproouing a wife 385 40 Of an husbands amiable countenance towards his wife 386 41 Of husbands too great austerity 387 42 Of an husbands familiar gesture with his wife 388 43 Of an husbands giuing fauours to his wife 389 44 Of husbands beating their wiues 389 45 Of an husbands bearing with his wiues infirmities 393 46 Of an husbands prouident care for his wife 396 47 Of an husbands prouiding meanes of spirituall edification for his wife 397 48 Of neglecting their wiues edification 398 49 Of an husbands prouiding things needfull for his wiues body 399 50 Of an husbands prouident care for his wife about her childe-bearing 399 51 Of neglecting wiues in their weaknesse 401 52 Of an husbands prouiding for his wife according to his estate and ability 402 53 Of an husbands niggardlinesse to his wife 402 54 Of husbands allowing their wiues to bestow on others as they see good occasion 403 55 Of husbands too great straitnesse ouer their wiues 405 56 Of an husbands care to prouide for his wife so long as she shall liue 406 57 Of husbands neglect of their wiues future estate 407 58 Of an husbands protecting his wife from danger 408 59 Of an husbands maintaining his wife against children of a former venter and seruants 409 60 Of neglecting to maintaine their wiues 410 61 Of an husbands first beginning to loue his wife 412 62 Of an husbands repaying vnkindnes for loue 413 63 Of the truth of husbands loue 414 64 Of husbands dissimulation 414 65 Of the freenesse of husbands loue 415 66 Of husbands louing for aduantage 415 67 Of the purity of husbands loue 415 68 Of husbands lightnesse 416 69 Of husbands louing their wiues more then themselues 417 70 Of husbands vnkindnesse 417 71 Of combats in pretence of wiues honour 417 72 Of husbands constancy in loue 418 73 Of husbands variablenesse 419 74 Of husbands louing their wiues as themselues 419 75 Of Christs example a motiue to prouoke husbands to loue their wiues 422 76 Of a mans loue to himselfe a motiue to prouoke him to loue his wife 426 V. TREATISE Of childrens duties § 1 OF the generall heads of childrens duties 427 2 Of childrens loue to their parents 428 3 Of a childes feare of his parents 430 4 Of a childes reuerence in refraining speech before his parent and in hearkning to his parent 431 5 Of a childes reuerend framing his speech to his parent 433 6 Of the vices in children contrary to the forenamed reuerence in speech 434 7 Of childrens reuerend speeches of their parents 435 8 Of a childes reuerend cariage to his parent 436 9 Of childrens asking their parents blessing whether it be lawfull or no. 437 10 Of the vices contrary to childrens reuerend gesture towards their parents 439 11 Of childrens obedience 441 12 Of childrens forbearing to doe things without consent of parents 442 13 Of consent of parents for childrens entring into a calling 443 14 Of the vnlawfulnesse of childrens entring into religious orders without consent of parents 443 15 Of the vnlawfulnesse of childrens trauelling and binding themselues prentises without consent of parents 446 16 Of parents consent to the mariage of their children 446 17 Of the equity of the point and reasons why children should haue their parents consent vnto their mariage 449 18 Of a childes carriage in case a parent prouide an vnfit mate or none at all 449 19 Of the sinne of children
Of parents making a will before they die 570 63 Of neglecting to make a will 571 64 Of parents leauing their estate to their children when they die 572 65 Of the inconueniences which improuident parents bring their children vnto after their death 573 66 Of parents impartiall respect to all their children 575 67 Of parents preferring a dutifull childe before a disobedient childe 576 68 Of the prerogatiue of the first borne sonne 576 69 Of parents partiality towards some children 578 70 Of the causes for which the first borne may be disinherited 579 71 Of the dutie of fathers and mothers in law 580 72 Of the peruerse carriage of fathers and mothers in law to their children 581 73 Of the faults of parents to their childrens husbands and wiues 582 74 Of their duty who are in stead of parents to orphants 583 75 Of the common neglect of orphants 584 76 Of the duty of guardians 584 77 Of the fraud of guardians 585 78 Of the duties of Schoolemasters and Tutors 586 79 Of the negligence of Schoolemasters and Tutors 587 VII TREATISE Of Seruants Duties § 1. A Resolution of the Apostles direction to seruants 589 2 Of the lawfulnesse of a masters place and power 591 3 Of the Anabaptists arguments against the authority of masters and subiection of seruants 592 4 Of a seruants feare of his master 594 5 Of the extremes contrary to seruants feare of their master 595 6 Of seruants reuerence in speech 596 7 Of the vices contrary to a seruants reuerance in speech 599 8 Of seruants reuerend behauiour to their masters 601 9 Of the faults of seruants contrary to reuerence in carriage 602 10 Of seruants obedience 603 11 Of seruants forbearing to doe things without their masters consent 604 12 Of the vnlawfull liberty which seruants take to themselues 606 13 Of seruants obedience to their masters commandements 608 14 Of seruants hearkning to their masters instructions in matters of their calling 608 15 Of seruants hearkning to their masters instructions in piety 609 16 Of seruants faults contrary to obedience in matters of religion 610 17 Of seruants obedience to reproofe and correction 611 18 Of the extremes contrary to seruants patient hearing of reproofe and correction 613 19 Of seruants amending that for which they are iustly reproued or corrected 614 20 Of seruing with trembling 615 21 Of seruing with sincerity 616 22 Of seruing for conscience sake 617 23 Of seruants willingnesse to performe their dutie 618 24 Of seruants quicknesse and diligence in their seruice 619 25 Of seruants faithfulnesse 622 26 Of seruants faithfulnesse about their masters goods 623 27 Of seruants carelesnesse ouer their masters goods 624 28 Of seruants fraud 625 29 Of seruants faithfulnesse in the businesses which they are to dispatch for their masters 626 30 Of seruants faithfulnesse in keeping their masters secrets and concealing their infirmities 628 31 Of seruants faithfulnesse in helping one another 629 32 Of seruants faithfulnesse about their masters children 630 33 Of seruants faithfulnesse in regard of their masters or mistresses bed-fellow 632 34 Of seruants faithfulnesse about their masters person 633 35 Of the meanes to make seruants faithfull 634 36 Of seruants endeuour to make their iudgements agree with their masters 635 37 Of seruants yeelding to doe such things at their masters command as they cannot thinke to be most meet 636 38 Of seruants forbearing to obey their master against God 637 39 Of seruants choosing good masters 639 40 Of the first motiue to enforce seruants duties The Place of Masters 641 41 Of the second motiue The Place of Seruants 642 42 Of the third motiue Gods will 642 43 Of the fourth motiue Reward of good seruice 643 VII TREATISE Of Masters duties § 1. OF the heads of masters duties 646 2 Of masters choosing good seruants 647 3 Of masters carelesnesse in choosing seruants 649 4 Of masters maintaining their authority 650 5 Of masters making their authority to be despised 651 6 Of masters too great rigor 652 7 Of masters commanding power restrained to things lawfull 653 8 Of masters presuming aboue their authority 654 9 Of masters commanding seruants to doe their dutie 655 10 Of the sinne of masters in suffering seruants to neglect their dutie 656 11 Of a masters wisdome in ordering things indifferent 656 12 Of masters offence against expediency 657 13 Of the power of masters to correct their seruants 658 14 Of the restraint of masters power that it reacheth not to their seruants life 659 15 Of masters excesse in correcting seruants 660 16 Of masters ordering that correction which they giue to their seruants 661 17 Of masters power ouer their seruants in and about their mariage 662 18 Of masters rigor in forcing mariages vpon their seruants or in seperating man and wife 664 19 Of masters power to dispose their seruants person 664 20 Of masters well managing their authority 665 21 Of masters endeuouring the saluation of their seruants 666 22 Of masters neglecting to edifie their seruants 668 23 Of allowing seruants sufficient food 668 24 Of defect and excesse in allowing seruants food 669 25 Of masters care about their seruants apparell 670 26 Of moderating seruants labour 671 27 Of affording seruants fit means for their worke 672 28 Of affording seasonable rest to seruants 672 29 Of denying seasonable rest to seruants 673 30 Of masters offence in keeping seruants from the rest of the Lords day 674 31 Of allowing time of recreation to seruants 675 32 Of masters care ouer their seruants in sicknesse and after death 675 33 Of neglect of seruants in sicknesse and after they are dead 677 34 Of masters prouiding for the future estate of their seruants 678 35 Of well imploying seruants 679 36 Of exercising seruants to a calling 679 37 Of appointing to euery seruant his particular function 681 38 Of disorders in families through masters negligence 682 39 Of masters ouerseeing the waies of their seruants 682 40 Of prouoking seruants to their duty both by faire and soule meanes 683 41 Of paying seruants their wages 684 42 Of masters iustice about their seruants wages 685 43 Of suffering seruants to prouide for themselues 686 44 Of kindnesse to be shewed to good seruants 686 45 Of vnkinde dealing with good seruants 688 46 Of the subiection vnder which masters are 689 47 Of the equality betwixt masters and seruants in relation to God 691 48 Of Gods being in heauen how it is a motiue to prouoke masters well to respect their seruants 691 49 Of Gods impartiall respect of all 693 The first Treatise AN EXPOSITION OF THAT PART OF SCRIPTVRE out of which Domesticall Duties are raised EPHES. 5. 21. Submit your selues one to another in the feare of God §. 1. Of the Apostles transition from generall duties to particulars AS there are two vocations whereunto it hath pleased God to call euery one one Generall by vertue whereof certaine common duties which are to be performed of all men
to hate his wife nor any vice seeme to him intolerable with goodnes he â—â—ught to ouercome euill If notorious sins seemed intolerable to Christ or that he thought any occasion iust to cause hatred many â—hat are of his Church would oft draw his hatred vpon them but Christ hateth neuer a member of his Church 4. There is no hope that euer I shall receiue any helpe of my wife or benefit from her Ans There is little charitie in such as can conceiue no hope for â—ue hopeth all things but yet the case so standeth with Christ The Church is so vtterly vnable to help or benefit him as he may iustly â—y he cannot hope to receiue any thing froÌ„ her Christ loueth the â—hurch for her own good not for his so ought husbands Thus if Christs example be well weighed obserued of husbands it will â—ford matter enough to remoue euery doubt or scruple raised to â—enate their affections from their wiues Fitly therefore hath the Apostle set it before husbands both to direct them how to loue their wiues and also to moue them so to doe §. 76. Of a mans loue to himselfe a motiue to prouoke him to loue his wife To the same purpose that Christs example tendeth tendeth also the patterne of a mans selfe Great is the affection that a man beareth to himselfe to his owne flesh his owne bodie he neuer hateth but euer loueth himselfe no sore no disease no paine no stinch that the flesh bringeth to a man can make him hate it but rather all manner of infirmities doe make him the more to pitty tender and cherish it This is a worke of nature the most heathenish and barbarous that euer were doe it Now a wife being to a man as his bodie and his flesh for they two are one flesh and God hauing commanded men to loue their wiues as their owne bodies these conclusions will necessarily follow from this motiue 1. He that loueth not his wife is more caried with the instinct of nature then with the expresse charge of the God of nature Natures instinct moueth him to loue his bodie But Gods expresse charge moueth him not to loue his wife 2. He that loueth not his wife is worse then an infidell and a barbarian yea then a very beast for all these loue their owne bodies and their owne flesh but a wife by Gods ordinance is as ones bodie and his flesh 3. He that loueth his wife loueth himselfe the Apostle himselfe in these very words layeth downe this conclusion from whence by the rule of contraries this also will follow He that loueth not his wife loueth not himselfe 4. He that loueth not his wife cannot but bring woe and mischiefe vpon himselfe For the damage and mischiefe which followeth on a wife through any neglect of dutie on her husband part followeth also on him as the mischiefe which followeth on the bodie through any negligence of the head lighteth also on the head If these be not motiues sufficient to prouoke an husband to loue his wife I know not what can be sufficient The fifth Treatise Duties of Children §. 1. Of the generall Heads of Childrens duties EPHES. 6. 1. Children obey your Parents in the Lord for this is right 2. Honour thy father and mother which is the first commandement with promise 3. That it may be well with thee and thou maist liue long on the earth THe second couple in a familie are Parents Children In laying downe their duties the Apostle beginneth with children his direction and instigation vnto them is laid downe in the three first verses of the sixt chapter wherein 1. He declareth their dutie 2. He addeth reasons to inforce the same In laying downe their dutie he noteth three points 1. Wherein it consisteth obey honour 2. To whom it is to be performed your parents 3. After what manner it is to be done in the Lord. The reasons vsed by the Apostle are foure 1. The place of parents in the Lord. 2. The aequitie of the thing this is right 3. The charge of God Honour thy father c. 4. The reward promised That it may goe well c. Vnder this word obey which the Apostle vseth and that word honour which the law vseth are all those duties comprised which any where thorowout the whole Scripture are inioyned to children We will therefore set them downe in some order and handle them distinctly one after another 1. The Fountaine of childrens duties is to be searched out 2. The Streames that flow from thence are to be obserued The Fountaine is an inward disposition of the heart compounded of loue and feare The Streames issuing from thence extend vnto parents both while they are liuing and also when they are dead Childrens duties which are to be performed to their parents while they liue haue respect to their Authoritie Necessitie  The Authoritie of parents requireth of children Reuerence Obedience  Their Necessitie requireth Recompence The duties which children owe to their parents deceased respect their Body Credit  Their Body with decency must be buried Their Credit with honour must be maintained §. 2. Of Childrens loue to their Parents I make the fountaine of childrens duties to be a mixed and compound disposition in respect of that authoritie and affection which is mixed together in parents The authoritie of parents requireth feare in children and their affection loue So intire and so ardent is parents affection towards their children as it would make children too bold and insolent if there were not authoritie mixed therewith to worke feare and so supreme and absolute is their authoritie ouer them as it would make children like slaues to dread their parents if a fatherly affection were not tempered therewith to breed loue But both these ioyned together make a very good composition loue like sugar sweetneth feare and feare like salt seasoneth loue and thus to ioyne them both together it is a louing-feare or a fearingloue which is the ground of childrens duties Where Christ forbiddeth an excessiue loue in children to their parents he implieth that parents are a fit obiect for children to loue so as their loue be wel moderated yea he implieth that it is an affection euen by nature ingraffed in children to loue their parents Ioseph is commended vnto children as a worthy patterne in louing his father and that from his youth till the decease of his father in testimony whereof in his younger yeeres he brought to his father the euill report of his brethren whereby he incurred their enuie and hatred which he would neuer haue done if he had not loued his father and hauing beene long absent from his father when by Gods prouidence there was offered an occasion for him to meet with his brethren one of his first questions to them was about their father and hearing that he was liuing he thought it not enough to send him food for his need but must also needs see his
mothers in law Fathers and mothers in law are to be ranked in the first degree of those who are in the place of naturall parents Very good proofe there is in Scripture for childrens subiection to them The respect which Moses beare to his father in law and Ruth to her mother in law and Christ himselfe to his supposed father are commended for this very purpose Subiection is noted in Christs example Reuerence in Moses Recompence in Ruths The mariage bond maketh man and wife one flesh whereupon the naturall parent that marieth another maketh that other one with him and in that respect is as a parent to the children and by them ought to be accounted so The law of God maketh it plaine inâ—â—st for a sonne to vncouer the shame of his mother in law or for a father in law to vncouer the shame of his daughter in law Whereby it appeareth that fathers and mothers in law are by Gods law in the very place and steed of naturall parents to their children and accordingly as naturall parents are to be honoured Besides it is a great honour which a childe doth to his naturall father or mother to respect such as they haue made one flesh with themselues as they doe their owne parent So as to honour a father or mother in law is to honour a naturall parent Contrary is the minde and cariage of most children Very few beare a reuerend dutifull and child-like respect to stepfathers and step-mothers but for the most part despise them in heart grumble at them in speech and are very vndutifull in their behauiour whence it commeth to passe that they bring much griefe to their naturall parent and oft cause much discord and dissention betwixt their naturall and step-parentâ— being herein set on worke by Satan who laboureth what he can to disunite those whom God hath neerely vnited together and made one flesh Lamentable experience sheweth that the second third or any after-mariages are seldome so comfortable and peaceable as the first especially if either the one or other or both haue children The cause thereof for the most part is in children who brooke not fathers or mothers in law Obiect Nature cannot so well brooke a step-parent as a naturall parent Answ 1. If not so well yet despise them not there is a difference betwixt extremes 2. Conscience and religion ought to alter corrupt nature Looke to Gods ordinance and let Gods feare possesse thine heart that that may bring thee to doe what nature cannot 2. Obiect Fathers and Mothers in law seldome respect their husbands or wiues former children Answ This obiection more beseemeth the mouth of a barbarian then a Christian The Gospell teacheth to be subiect not only to the good and gentle but also to the froward and not to be ouercome of euill but to ouercome euill with goodnesse The Scripture reckoneth such as rise vp against their parents in law among such as rise vp against their naturall parents shewing thereby that the impietie of those is as blame-worthy as the impietie of these §. 58. Of childrens subiection to Guardians Tutors c. For childrens subiection to Gouernours Guardians and Tutors the Apostle saith that a childe is vnder them If by the law children are vnder them they ought in equitie to be subiect to them It is expresly noted of Esther euen after the King had chosen her for his wife that she did the commandement of Mordecai who was as a Guardian to her like as when she was brought vp with him A memorable patterne for this purpose What pretences might she haue made to haue cast off all manner of subiection Mordecai was but her cosen she was now aduanced aboue him a wife she was and so subiect to her husband yea a Kings wife and so her selfe a Queene yet she was subiect and her subiection commended We reade that the children of the Prophets much respected Elisha did reuerence to him and were obedient to him because he was as a father and tutor vnto them in which respect also Elisha was as a childe subiect to Eliah whom he called father Guardians Tutors and such like ouer-seers of children haue a parents charge laid vpon them as we shall after shew great reason therefore that child-like dutie should be yeelded to them Their honour must be answerable to their charge and care Contrary is the conceit of many lawlesse children whose parents being dead or they being sent and placed abroad out of the gouernment of their parents thinke they are cleane free from all gouernment and may liue as they list Their practise being correspondent to this opinion they runne into all riot and in time bring themselues to vtter ruine It is the ouerthrow of many children that they regard not their Guardians Tutors and Gouernours and God in iudgement bringeth many such refractarie children to some fearefull shamefull end or other Let children therefore be wise and not take too much libertie to themselues Thus farre haue beene handled the duties of children in their seuerall kindes the manner of performing them and the parties to whom they are to be performed It remaineth to speake of the reasons which the Apostle alledgeth to inforce those duties §. 59. Of the place of parents whereby children ought to be moued to obey them The reasons which the Apostle vseth to moue children to performe their dutie are foure The first is taken from the place of the parent The second from the equitie of the thing The third from Gods expresse charge The fourth from Gods promise I. The place of a parent is noted forth by this phrase IN THE LORD which as it affordeth a limitation and giueth a direction to children so it addeth a spur vnto them to stirre them vp to performe their dutie for it sheweth that parents are to then children in the Lords steed as an euidence thereof hath God communicated to them this glorious and honourable title FATHER which is proper and peculiar to himselfe Now then parents being to their children in Gods steed and by vertue of their place bearing Gods image children in obeying their parents obey God in refusing to obey them refuse to obey God A strong motiue is this first motiue For who is so void of religion but will thinke it most meet that God should be honoured or who so impious as to refuse to yeeld dutie to God Here then children may learne in one maine point how to honour the Lord shew themselues children of God And let them here by know that disobedient and vndutifull children that resist the authoritie of parents resist the ordinance of God and receiue to themselues damnation §. 60. Of the equitie whereby children should be moued to obey their parents II. The second reason in these words for this is right though it be not of greater force yet is it more plainly and expresly noted to be a reason as the
annexed to it so it is the first that God gaue of any dutie to be performed vnto man The very order of the decalogue manifesteth the truth hereof The reason is cleere Honour due to parents is the ground of all the duties required in the second table for if dutie be not performed to such as we are bound vnto by some peculiar bond may we thinke that it will be performed to such as we are bound vnto at large Now of all to whom we are first and most bound and to whom we owe our first dutie our parents are the persons They therefore who are rebellious against their parents and refuse to doe their dutie to them will hardly performe dutie to any other Little hope that a disobedient childe will proue a profitable member in Church or common-wealth Absolom who was a rebellious childe proued but a traiterous subiect and Hophâ—â— and Phineas that refused to hearken to the voice of their father proued but sacrilegious Priests Wherefore if any precept of the second table be conscionably to be obserued as all are for the same law-maker gaue all and Christ hath said that the second table is like the first then is this of honouring father and mother among the rest and aboue the rest to be obserued at least if difference of obseruing any may be made But this particle first being set downe not simply but with a connexion of promise with it The first with promise we are duly to consider the promise thereof whence a fourth reason ariseth §. 64. Of Gods promise mouing children to obey their parents The fourth reason taken from Gods promise is both generally propounded and particularly exemplified Propounded in this clause first with promise Exemplified in the third verse For the Generall Gods promise made to the performance of any duty cannot but be a strong motiue to stirre vs vp to performe it Men hereby doe stirre vp and prouoke one another to performe any thing Thus Kings when they would faine haue their subiects doe this or that promise such and such rewards vnto them Thus masters incite their seruants parents their children and one man another If the promises of men incourage vs to performe the things which they giue vs in charge how much more ought the promise of God Men â—re deceitfull and may deale doubly pretending one thing with their mouthes and intending another with their heart â—nd neuer meane to performe what they promise But God is faithfull and true his words are as deeds his promises as performances so as he neuer maketh shew of more then he means â—o performe Againe mans power is limited though he truly â—â—tend what he promiseth yet in the performance he may faile â—ither in that he knew not his owne power but thought when â—e made the promise he could haue done more then in the eâ—ent he findeth he can doe or in that he is after wards by some occasion hindered or disabled But Gods power cannot be so â—aitned or hindered Besides men may be taken away before â—etime of performing their promise is come but God euer â—â—eth and changeth not If then mans promises be any moues to any thing much more Gods who euer remaineth the â—me Betwixt God and man there is no proportion no comâ—rison This motiue doth exceedingly commend Gods fatherly indulgencie towards vs and the earnest desire he hath of our good For he hath such power and authoritie ouer all his creatures that the very knowledge of his will ought to prouoke them to performe any dutie which he shall command and if they obey not he might presently execute vengeance vpon them But considering that we are his children and need many allurements to draw vs on by little and little he accordingly dealeth with vs. He standeth not wholly and only vpon his authoritie but addeth promises thereto for this is a commandement with promise If notwithstanding all this children refuse to obey their parents may not the Lord iustly expostulate the matter with them as sometimes in another case he did with the Israelites and say Iudge betweene me and these children what could I haue done more that I haue not done I gaue them an expresse charge to honour their parents I laid it downe in the first place as a maine and principall charge to incourage them to keepe it I added a promise of good to redound to themselues what could I doe more Doe not they iustly deserue vengeance that regard none of these Thus in that this is a commandement with promise we see how children disobedient to their parents are both rebellious against God in regard of the commandement which they transgresse and iniurious to themselues in regard of the promise which they make to be void and of no effect Of this particular promise see more in the first treatise § 97 98 c. The sixth Treatise The Duties of Parents §. 1. Of the heads of Parents duties EPHES. 6. 4. And ye Fathers prouoke not your children to wrath but bring them vp in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. NExt to childrens follow Parents duties which the Apostle layeth down in this fourth verse where he noteth 1. The duties 2. The parties 1. That are to performe the duties Fathers 2. To whom they are to be performed Children The duties are set downe 1. By prohibition 2. By precept  The prohibition noteth out one extreme which is ouermuch rigour Prouoke not to wrath The inference of the precept vpon the prohibition noteth out another extreme which is ouer-much-remisnesse The precept it selfe enioyneth to parents three duties 1. To nourish children namely with food apparrell and other like necessaries Nourish them 2. To nurture them namely with good discipline In nurture 3. To instruct them namely in the waies of God And admonition of the Lord. Nature teacheth Vnreasonable Creatures to doe the First Ciuility Reasonable Men  Second  Piety Christians  Third  To these heads may all the seuerall points which I shall deliuer concerning parents duties be referred That Parents may the better discerne how one dutie followeth another I will proceed in this order 1. The fountaine of all duties shall be declared 2. The streames that issue thence  The streames shall be diuided into two riuers In the first are those generall duties that are continually to be done In the second such particular duties as are to be applied to the seuerall ages of children There are two principall generall duties 1. Faithfull prayer to God 2. Vpright walking with God All the particulars may be comprised vnder this one head A prouident care And this hath respect 1. To the Infancy of children 2. To their Youth 3. To the time of their placing forth 4. To the time of parents departing out of this world §. 2. Of that Loue which parents owe to their children The Fountaine of parents duties is Loue. This is expresly enioyned to them Many approued examples are recorded
that fathers can endure therein Their fault therefore must needs be the greater if any way they be an occasion of their childes putting forth to nurse which I haue the rather noted because husbands for the most part are the cause that their wiues nurse not their owne children and that partly by suffering and partly by egging them on to put out their children If husbands were willing that their wiues should performe this dutie and would perswade and incourage them thereto and afford them what helpes they could where one mother now nurseth her childe twenty would doe it §. 17. Of parents ioynt care about their childrens Baptisme There is a further dutie to be performed of parents to their children euen in their infancy and that is in regard of their spirituall good which is this Parents ought to procure that their children be rightly baptized in due season This is indeed a common dutie appertaining to both parents but most principally to the father and that for two reasons 1. The father is the chiefe and principall Gouernour and hath the greatest charge accordingly he ought to haue the greatest care euen in such matters as are common to both 2. The mother at that time by reason of her trauell and deliuery is weake and not in case to haue her head much troubled with many cares much lesse able her selfe to take order for such weighty matters Only the husband is to make knowne to his wife if she be not extraordinarily weake what his purpose is concerning the place time manner and other like circumstances of baptizing the childe and to aduise with her about the name witnesses and such like points And if the husband be too backward and negligent the wife ought so farre as she is able to put him in minde of his dutie therein and to stirre him vp by her selfe or some other to performe it §. 18. Of the reasons to moue parents to see their children baptized That parents are bound to procure Baptisme for their children these reasons declare 1. The commandement of God concerning circumcising â—hildren in the roome whereof Baptisme succeedeth now â—nder the Gospell Col. 2. 11 12. Gods commandement to â—his dutie was first giuen to Abraham and that for himselfe â—nd all his posterity to obserue Gen. 17. 10. After this it was â—n the law laid downe as a positiue statute Leu. 12. 3. 2. The practise of the Iewes in a faithfull and constant obâ—â—ruance of this ordinance as of Abraham of Zachary and â—lizabeth of Ioseph and Mary and many others Obiect The children which were borne in the wildernesse were not circumcised Answ They had no abiding place in the wildernesse but were euer and anon remouing so as it would haue beene dangerous for the children to haue beene circumcised in that extraordinary case this rule tooke place I will haue mercy and not sacrifice 3. The practise of Christians who beleeuing were themselues and their whole houshold baptized Vnder whole houshold children must needs be comprised 4. Christs embracing and blessing such children as were brought to him and rebuking those that would haue kept them from him 5. The promise of God made to them for seeing God is so gratious as to extend his promise to our children our care must be to procure the seale which God offereth for the confirmation of that promise 6. The right they haue to Gods Kingdome Baptisme is an euidence of that their right It is parents duty to get them that euidence If children haue iust title to any lands and reuenues or to any earthly honours and dignities parents will doe what they can to make that title sure vnto them euen in their infancy much more carefull should they be to make that rich and glorious inheritance which is in heauen reserued for them as sure vnto them as they can now no better meanes for the effecting of this then Baptisme 7. Their conception and birth in sinne Children drew contagion from their parents therefore great reason it is that their parents should see them washed with the water of regeneration 8. The comfort which from the performance of this dutie will arise to Christian parents yea and to the children also themselues when they come to the age of vnderstanding When parents behold the couenant of God surely sealed and confirmed to their children they cannot if at least they beare any loue to their children but much reioyce therein And it must needs also much comfort the childe when being of vnderstanding he shall know that from his infancy he hath caried the seale and pledge of his regeneration 9. The constant continued custome of the true catholicke Church which euer since the Apostles time hath afforded the sacrament of baptisme to children §. 19. Of Parents procuring their children to be rightly baptized There being such forceable motiues to stirre vp parents to performe the dutie which motiues shew it to be a weightie dutie I will further shew how this dutie ought to be performed Two things in childrens baptisme ought to be obserued 1. That it be rightly done 2. That it be seasonably done In the right performance thereof some things are necessarie and some expedient Things of necessitie are these especially 1. That the childe be baptized by a Minister of the word 2. That it be baptized with the element of water the only element sanctified to this purpose 3. That the forme prescribed by Christ Matth. 28. 19. be vsed In the name of the Father and of the Sonne and of the Holy Ghost whereby the vnitie of the Godhead and trinitie of Persons is plainly set forth 4. That the proper rite be vsed of applying the water to the bodie of the childe so as at least the face of the childe may be sprinkled therewith Things of expediencie are 1. That the childe be baptized in a publike place where Gods people ordinarily meet together being set apart for the worship and seruice of God 2. That such a time be chosen out as an assembly of Saints may be there present These two circumstances are the rather to be obserued because Baptisme is one of the solemne parts of Gods publike worship a pledge of our incorporation into the bodie of Christ and communion of his Saints and therefore with the more solemnitie as a matter of great moment before many witnesses with the assistance of the faithfull prayers of an assembly of Saints to be performed §. 20. Of Parents care to giue a fit name to their childe at his Baptisme A third matter of great expediencie about a childs baptisme is that Parents be carefull in giuing a fit name It belongeth to Parents to giue the name to their childe for so holy parents whose patterne in Scripture is in this respect commended vnto vs haue done from time to time and for their warrant to doe it it is worthy to be noted that when God was pleased to appoint a name to a
Constituere pyras huc corpora quisque suâ—rum More tulere â—aâ—rum subiect siue ignibus c. Virg. Aeneid 11. a Gen. 25. 9. b 35. 29. c 50. 7. 1. Reason d 1 King 14. 13. 2 King 22. 20. 2. Reason f Ier. 22. 19. 1 King 21. 23 24. Psal 79. 3. g 2 Sam. 2. 5. 3. Reason Sinne of children to neglect their parents dead corps Sinne of children entring vpon their parents estate before they are dead 1 King 1. 5. Sinne of children disturbing their parents funerall Gen. 27. 41. Gen. 50. 7. Contrary 1. Too sumptuous funerals Act. 8. 2. 2. Too base funeralls Childrens respect to the credit of their deceased parents Psal 37. 21. §. 7. Mat. 7. 2. Quaecunque parentibus stipendia intuleris eadem ipse a filiis expecta Thal. Miles apud Diâ—g Laert. l. 1. 1 King 3. 3. 2 King 22. 2. 1 King 15. 11. Nullum monumentum clarius relinquere potuit quà m effigiem morum suorum virtutis constantiae pietatis filium Cic. Philip. 9. 1 King 12. 16. 1 King 15. 26. Bellar. Tom. 2. Contr. 3. De Purgator l. 2. c. 16. c. * In whole armour of God Treat 3. §. 39. 40. in Ephes 6. 18. Seneca in AgameÌ„ Poetae tradiderunt filios patris vlciscendi causa supplicium de matre sumpsisse idque deorum iussis atque oraculis fecisse Cic. pro. Sex Ros b Rom. 12. 17 c 19. Mat. 5. 39. d 1 King 2. 5. 8. e 2 Sam. 3. 39. 19. 23. * § 37. How children obey their parents in the Lord. 1. By obeying for the Lords sake Rom. 13. 5. 1 Pet. 2. 13. Col. 3. 20. 2 In sincerity Col. 3. 23. 3. With cheerefulnesse 2 Cor. 9. 7. 4 With reuetence * §. 3. 5. In the feare of God * §. 37. 38. 6. With perseverance Faults in the manner of doing duty 1. By-respects 2. Complementall 3. Rudely 4. Grudgingly * §. 38. 5. Onely to please man 6. Vnsetledly Gen. 28. 7. Reasons Both parents to be of like account with children Direction for a childe when one parent commandeth one thing the other another Familiaritas parit contemptum Teren. in Andr. * §. 2 3. * §. 54. Leu. 19. 3. De necessitate De honestate * See §. 16. Phil. 4. 8. Exo. 18. 7. Ruth 1. 2. Luk. 2. 51. 1. Reason Leu. 18. 8 17. 2. Reason 1 Pet. 2. 18. Rom. 12. 21. Mic. 7. 6. Galat. 4. 2. Esth 2. 20. 2 Kin. 2. 15 c. 6. 1. 2 King 2. 12. * Treat 6. §. 74 c. * â— 37. * §. 52. Liberis suis pater Dei vice est Greg. Naz. ad Vitit * See §. 5. Rom. 13. 2. Right implieth three things 1. It is agreeable to all law 2. It is due by vertue of parents place 3. It is a debt Coloss 3. 20. b 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 1 Tim. 5. 4. c 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Gen. 31. 7 c. vers 42. 1 Sam. 2. 34. 2 Sam. 18. 9. 1 King 2. 25. Childrens obedience to parents is 1. No arbitrary thing 2. An eternall law and generall to all children a Gen. 47. 12. 48. 12. 50. 5. b 1 King 2. 19. 3. Indispensable Exo. 20. 1. Mat. 22. 39. Promise of reward a great motiue How Gods promise is a stronger motiue then any mans How Gods promise commendeth Gods loue Isa 5. 3 4. a Tit. 2. 4. b Gen. 22. 2. c 25. 28. d Ibid. As I haue heretofore laid downe Loue a fountaine of wiues husbands and childrens duties so must I continue my course and set it forth as the fountaine of parents duties For the Scripture hath noted it as a dutie belonging to all and euery of them and therefore I might not omit it in any of them Yet let not any thereupon thinke that the same point is oft handled and repeated againe and againe For according to the seuerall parties and the seuerall relation they haue to others there are seuerall fruits of loue euen as the same moisture of the earth causeth seuerall and diuers fruits according to the seuerall kindes of plants that receiue that moisture Compare the seuerall places where this generall duty of loue hath beene handled and you will finde the manner of handling to be different and to afford new matter Want of naturall affection in parents a Rom. 1. 30. Tit. 3. 3. b 2 King 16. 3. 21. 6. Ezek. 16. 20. c Leu. 18. 21. d 20. 2. * Purc Pilgr in Americ cap. 7. cap. 11. Haters of children for piety Doting on children 1 Thes 5. 17. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Praier a peculiar dutie of parents b Gen. 17. 7. c Deut. 5. 29. d Act. 2. 39. Treat 5. §. 9. e Gen. 25. 21. f 1 Sam. 1. 10. Paulam antè votis quà m vtero concepisti Hier. ad 1 aet e Gen. 25. 21. g Gen. 25. 22. h Luk. 1. 64. i Iob. 1. 5. k Gen. 27. 4. Parents neglect of praier Parents imprecations against children a Psal 1. 12. 2. b Pro. 20. 7. c 13. 22. d Deut. 5. 29. e Ezec. 18. 20. Hab. 2. 4. g Gen. 4. 11. h 9. 25. i 2 Sam. 18. 15. k 1 Sam. 2. 30. l 2 Chr. 28. 27. m 2 Sam. 13. 14 29. Relinque bonam filijs memoriam magis quà m diuitias multas Bas serm in Scrip. loc a Pro. 23. 5. b Tro. 10. 22. c Hos 13. 11. Ne liberos praetexas Qui enim filium fecit te fecit qui etiam tibi occasiones nutriend praebet filio praebebit vitae subsidia Basil loc â—it How farre parents prouidence extendeth it selfe * Grauidae corpora curare debent Mens item earum quietem desiderat Quae enim procreantur à matre in cuius aluo continentur alimentum capiunt vt à terra ea-quae gignantur ex ea Arist Pol. lib. 7. a Iudg. 13. 4. Iudg. 13. 11 c. Contrary 1. To miscarry through negligence 2. To make away a childe in the wombe Omne quod formatam animam à Deo accepit vindie abitur si iniuslè interimatur Constit Apost l. 7. c. 4. Iniquiffima volucris Aquila dicitur quiae taedio nutriendi pullum quem genuit ipsa fugat Tales parentes ij sunt qui liberos suos infantes exponunt Basil Hexam hom 8. Necare videtur qui partum abijcit qui publicis locis misericordiae causa quam ipse non habet exponit Digest l 25. tit 3. §. 4. 1 Pet. 2. 2. Postquam ablactaueris cam c. dixit Hier. ad Laetam de filia sua Gen. 49. 25. Ose 9. 14. Exo. 2. 7 c. 1. Tim. 5. 10. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Tit. 2. 4. Gen. 21. 7. m 1 Sam. 1. 22. n Psal 22. 9. o 1 King 3. 21. Gen. 21. 7. Psal 22. 9. Cant. 8. 1. Luk. 11. 27. Ipsa suggerit natura matribus ipsis lactandos esse suos foetus Idoirco enim animanti enixae lactis alimentum omni
OF DOMESTICALL DVTIES Eight Treatises I. An Exposition of that part of Scripture out of which Domesticall Duties are raised II. 1. A right Coniunction of Man and Wife 2. Common-mutuall Duties betwixt Man and Wife III. Particular Duties of Wiues IV. Particular Duties of Husbands V. Duties of Children VI. Duties of Parents VII Duties of Seruants VIII Duties of Masters By WILLIAM GOVGE LONDON Printed by Iohn Haviland for William Bladen and are to be sold at the signe of the Bible neere the great North doore of Pauls 1622. TO THE RIGHT HONOVRABLE RIGHT VVorshipfull and other my beloued Parishioners Inhabitants of the Precinct of Black-friers LONDON such sufficiencie of Grace as may bring them to fulnesse of Glory IF noble Birth high Honour great Estate true Piety bountifull Charity good Esteeme of Gods word and Ministers and in particular intire loue of the Author be inducements to choose a Patron for his worke I for my part need not goe farre for a Patron In mine owne parish are all these To you therefore right Honourable right Worshipfull and other my beloued Parishioners most worthy of all due respect doe I dedicate these my poore paines about Domesticall Duties To testifie the equall dutie which I owe and the impartiall respect which I beare to you all I make you all as one Patron You were the first ouer whom I euer had any ministeriall charge To this charge by your free choice was I called Among you haue I spent almost two full prentiships You haue alwaies so accepted my paines and respected my person as I neuer had any cause to repent my acceptance of this place and calling but rather to thanke God for the same My desire is if so it may seeme good to the diuine prouidence to spend all my daies among you and while I am among you to helpe forward your spirituall edification This is the maine end of my calling and the marke which as in the ordinary course of my Ministry so in the publishing of these Eight Treatises of Domesticall Duties and dedicating them to you I haue aimed at As in testimony of Loue and Dutie I haue preached in your hearing and published in your name these Duties so doe you manifest your kinde acceptance of my former and latter paines by a conscionable obseruing of them so farre forth as they are agreeable to Gods word that all who know you may know by that euident demonstration how well you haue relished and approued them Thus shall you gaine much profit and my selfe much comfort by my paines Oh if the head and seuerall members of a family would be perswaded euery of them to be conscionable in performing their owne particular duties what a sweet society and happy harmony would there be in houses What excellent seminaries would families be to Church and Common-wealth Necessary it is that good order be first set in families for as they were before other polities so they are somewhat the more necessary and good members of a family are like to make good members of Church and common-wealth The subiect matter therefore of these Treatises is worth the handling if I were able according to the worth thereof to handle it I haue endeuoured to doe what I could therein though I haue not attained to what I would Be you like vnto God who if there be first a willing mind accepteth according to that a man hath and not according to that he hath not Though for such a matter as is handled in these Treatises the worke may seeme at first sight to be too copious yet I hope the obseruant Reader will not finde it too tedious It is the variety of many not the prolixity of few points which hath made this booke to swell to that bignesse which it hath The first Treatise which is a fourth part of the booke containeth a Commentary on that part of Scripture out of which Domesticall Duties are raised wherein the Apostle setting forth Christ and the Church as patternes to husbands and wiues liuely declareth the great loue of Christ to his Church and the neere vnion betwixt them together with other deepe mysteries the vnfolding whereof hath a little the longer detained me But as I haue a while insisted on maine matters of much moment so haue I very briefly passed ouer other points The other Treatises wherein the Duties themselues are handled are euery of them much shorter then the first In them I haue barely propounded and briefly proued the truth and equity of the seuerall duties except some choice points which are of especiall vse or at least through disuse much questioned and them I haue more largely handled And because contraries laid together doe much set forth each other in their liuely colours I haue to euery duty annexed the contrary fault and aberration from it For many that heare the duties thinke all well enough till they heare also the contrary vices whereby in their consciences they are most conuinced Concerning the many faults and vices of bad Husbands Wiues Parents Children Masters and Seruants taxed in these Treatises let me intreat you not to apply them too generally to all Husbands Wiues Parents Children Masters and Seruants Hath not wise Solomon much taxed the lightnesse shrewishnesse pride flattery and other vices of women And shall sober meeke humble honest women thinke themselues taxed thereby By like reason might vnchaste strumpets vntrusty gossips vnquiet shrewes and proud dames thinke themselues commended by those excellent commendations which be giueth of good women Let euery one as their conscience an impartiall Iudge shall beare them witnesse make a right application of euery thing to themselues Thus shall we Ministers be freed from many euill surmizes I remember that when these Domesticall Duties were first vttered out of the pulpit much exception was taken against the application of a wiues subiection to the restraining of her from disposing the common goods of the family without or against her husbands consent But surely they that made those exceptions did not well thinke of the Cautions and Lamitations which were then deliuered and are now againe expresly noted which are that the foresaid restraint be not extended to the proper goods of a wife no nor ouerstrictly to such goods as are set apart for the vse of the family nor to extraordinary cases nor alwaies to an expresse consent nor to the consent of such husbands as are impotent or farre and long absent If any other warrantable caution shall be shewed me I will be as willing to admit it as any of these Now that my meaning may not still be peruerted I pray you in reading the restraint of wiues power in disposing the goods of the family euer beare in minde those Cautions Other exceptions were made against some other particular duties of wiues For many that can patiently enough heare their duties declared in generall termes cannot endure to heare those generals exemplified in their particular branches
This commeth too neere to the quicke and pierceth too deepe But to interpret all according to the rule of loue in the better part I take the maine reason of the many exceptions which were taken to be this that wiues duties according to the Apostles method being in the first place handled there was taught as must haue beene taught except the truth should haue beene betrayed what a wife in the vttermost extent of that subiection vnder which God hath put her is bound vnto in case her husband will stand vpon the vttermost of his authority which was so taken as if I had taught that an husband might and ought to exact the vttermost and that a wife was bound in that vttermost extent to doe all that was deliuered as dutie whether her husband exact it or no. But when I came to deliuer husbands duties I shewed that he ought not to exact whatsoeuer his wife was bound vnto in case it were exacted by him but that he ought to make her a ioynt Gouernour of the family with himselfe and referre the ordering of many things to her discretion and with all honourable and kinde respect to carrie himselfe towards her In a word I so set downe an husbands duties as if he be wise and conscionable in obseruing them his wife can haue no iust cause to complaine of her subiection That which maketh a wiues yoake heauy and hard is an husbands abuse of his authority and more pressing his wiues dutie then performing his owne which is directly contrary to the Apostles rule This iust Apologie I haue beene forced to make that I might not euer be iudged as some haue censured me an hater of women Now that in all those places where a wiues yoke may seeme most to pinch I might giue some ease I haue to euery head of wiues duties made a reference in the margin ouer against it to the duties of husbands answerable thereunto and noted the reference with this marke * that it might the more readily be turned vnto Yea I haue further parallel'd and laid euen one against another in one view the heads of husbands and wiues duties as they answer each other and in like manner the contrary aberrations with a reference made vnto the particular sections where they are handled that so on the one side it may appeare that if both of them be conscionable and carefull to performe their owne duty the matrimoniall yoke will so equally lie on both their necks as the wife will be no more pinched therewith then the husband but that it will be like Christs spirituall yoke light and easie and that on the other side it may be manifest that there is commonly as much failing by husbands in their duties as by wiues in theirs This parallel and euen-setting out of each of their duties and of the contrary aberrations I haue annexed next to this epistle And further I haue added thereto a table of the seuerall heads of those points that are handled in the eight following Treatises that by this helpe you may the more readily finde out such particular points as you desire most especially to read To shew that the duties prescribed to Husbands Wiues Parents Children Masters and Seruants are such as in conscience they are bound vnto I haue endeuoured to shew how they are grounded on the word of God and gathered from thence To auoid prolixity I haue referred most of the quotations to the margin If your leisure will serue you you may doe well to search them out Two things haue beene especiall helpes to me for finding out the many duties noted in these Treatises vices contrary thereunto Obseruation and Disposition Obseruation both of such duties as the Scripture commendeth and contrary vices as it condemneth and also of such commendable virtues as I well liked in those Husbands Wiues Parents Children Masters and Seruants that I came among and such vnseemely vices as I disliked in them and Disposition of one point after another in the best order that I could My method and manner of proceeding brought many things to my minde which otherwise might haue slipped by For by method sundry and seuerall points appertaining to one matter are drawne forth as in a chaine one linke draweth vp another There is no better way to finde out many obseruations in a text then by a methodicall resolution thereof As method is an helpe to Inuention so also to retention It is as the thread or wier whereon pearles are put which keepeth them from scattering And if a man by abundance of matter be cast into a labyrinth by the helpe of method he may easily and readily finde out the way againe In which respects method is fitly stiled the Mother of the Minde and Mistresse of Memorie If you well marke the order and dependance of points one vpon another you will finde as great an helpe in conceiuing and remembring them as I did in inuenting and disposing them Because there is not one word to comprise vnder it both masters and mistresses as fathers and mothers are comprised vnder Parents and sonnes and daughters vnder Children I haue according to the Scripture phrase comprised Mistresses vnder Masters so as the duties enioyned to them belong to these so farre as may stand with their sex To conclude in recompence of all my paines I heartily pray you all to pray heartily for him who daily praieth for you euen The Watch-man of your soules WILLIAM GOVGE A few faults escaped in the printing are noted in the end of the booke which I desire you to amend with a pen. TREAT III.  Particular duties of Wiues  SVbiection the generall head of all wiues duties § 2.  1 Acknowledgment of an husbands superioritie § 3. 2 A due esteeme of her owne husband to be the best for her and worthy of honour on her part § 5. 3 An inward wiue-like feare § 7. 4 An outward reuerend cariage towards her husband which consisteth in a wiue-like sobrietie mildnesse curtesie and modestie in apparell § 9 10 11 12. 5 Reuerend speech to and of her husband § 13 14 15 16. 6 Obedience § 17. 7 Forbearing to doe without or against her husbands consent such things as he hath power to order as to dispose and order the common goods of the familie and the allowance for it or children seruants cattell guests iournies c. § 18 23 38 39 40 41. 8 A ready yeelding to what her husband would haue done This is manifested by her willingnesse to dwell where he will to come when he calls and to doe what he requireth § 43 44 45 46. 9 A patient bearing of any reproofe and a ready redressing of that for which she is iustly reproued § 47 48. 10 Contentment with her husbands present estate § 49. 11 Such a subiection as may stand with her subiection to Christ § 51. 12 Such a subiection as the Church yeeldeth to Christ which is sincere
in marying without their parents consent 450 20 Of obiections for childrens marying without parents consent answered 451 21 Of sâ—ealing children from parents for mariage sake 452 22 Of ministers sinne in marying children without parents consent 452 23 Of childrens forbearing to dispose any of their parents goods without consent 453 24 Of the sinne of children in purloining and wasting their parents goods 454 25 Of childrens contentednesse to be apparelled after their parents minde and liking 456 26 Of childrens forbearing to binde themselues to doe any thing against their parents consent 456 27 Of childrens actiue obedience 457 28 Of childrens obedience to their parents commandements 457 29 Of childrens disobedience to their parents commandements 459 30 Of childrens obedience to their parents instruction 459 31 Of childrens patience to their parents reproofe 460 32 Of childrens readinesse to amend what is iustly reproued by their parents 461 33 Of childrens submission to their parents correction 462 34 Of refusing or abusing correction 463 35 Of childrens conforming their iudgements to their parents 464 36 Of childrens yeelding to practise at their parents command such things as in their iudgements they cannot thinke very meet 465 37 Of the restraint of childrens obedience 467 38 Of childrens sinne in yeelding to their parents against God 468 39 Of childrens recompence 469 40 Of infirmities whereunto parents are subiect 470 41 Of childrens bearing with their parents infirmities 470 42 Of childrens couering their parents infirmities 471 43 Of childrens bearing with their parents casuall necessities 472 44 Of childrens releeuing their parents according to their need 473 45 Of childrens care to burie their parents being dead 475 46 Of decency wherewith children ought to see their parents buried 477 47 Of childrens paying their parents debts after their death 478 48 Of childrens suppressing euill reports against their parents deceased 479 49 Of childrens imitating their parents good example 479 50 Of the superstitious dutie enioyned by Papists to children after their parents decease 481 51 Of the vnlawfulnesse of childrens seeking to reuenge their parents wrongs 481 52 Of the manner of performing childrens duties 482 53 Of the aberrations of children in the manner of their obedience 483 54 Of the equall respect that Children are to beare to both parents 484 55 Of pretences alledged to obey father rather then mother 485 56 Of the difference of childrens subiection to naturall parents and to such as only are in the place of parents 487 57 Of childrens subiection to fathers and mothers in law 488 58 Of childrens subiection to Guardians Tutors c. 489 59 Of the place of parents whereby children ought to be moued to obey them 490 60 Of the equitie whereby children should be moued to obey their parents 491 61 Of Gods accepting childrens obedience 492 62 Of Gods charge how inuiolable a bond it is to tie children to obey their parents 493 63 Of the title First giuen to the fift commandement 494 64 Of Gods promise mouing children to obey their parents 495 VI. TREATISE Of Parents Duties § 1. OF the heads of parents duties 497 2 Of that loue which parents owe to their children 498 3 Of the contraries to loue 499 4 Of parents praying for their children 500 5 Of vices contrary to parents praying for their children 501 6 Of parents endeuouring to be righteous that they may leaue Gods blessing to their children 502 7 Of the preposterous course which couetous and vniust parents take for the good of their children 503 8 Of parents prouidence for their children 505 9 Of a mothers care ouer her childe while it is in her wombe 505 10 Of prouiding things needfull for the childe so soone as it is borne and of cruelty contrary thereunto 506 11 Of giuing sucke to children 507 12 Of mothers giuing sucke to their owne children 508 13 Of the obiections for putting children forth to nurse 513 14 Of the fathers duty in incouraging his wife to nurse her childe 517 15 Of the faults contrary to a mothers nursing her childe 517 16 Of a fathers fault in hindring his wiues nursing of her childe 518 17 Of parents ioynt care about their childrens baptisme 518 18 Of the reasons to moue parents to see their children baptised 519 19 Of parents procuring their children to be rightly baptised 521 20 Of parents care to giue a fit name to their childe at his baptisme 522 21 Of parents care in bringing their children to be baptised in due season 523 22 Of parents faults in neglecting their childrens Baptisme 523 23 Of parents prouiding things needfull for the life and health of their children 525 24 Of parents too much niggardlinesse and carelesnesse towards their children 527 25 Of parents too much lauishnesse and indulgency vpon their children 527 26 Of well nurturing children 529 27 Of parents neglect in nurturing children 529 28 Of parents teaching their children good manners 530 29 Of the obiections against good manners 531 30 Of parents suffering their children to be rudely brought vp 532 31 Of parents training vp their children to some good calling 532 32 Of parents care in choosing a fit calling for their children 534 33 Of parents faults contrary to their duty of training their children vp to a calling 535 34 Of parents teaching their children piety 536 35 Of directing parents how to teach their children true piety 539 36 Of parents faults contrary to their dutie of teaching their children piety 542 37 Of instructing children so soone as they are capable 543 38 Of mothers peculiar care in nurturing young children 546 39 Of letting slip the best time for nurture 547 40 Of parents continuing to nurture their children 547 41 Of parents folly in letting goe all their power ouer their children 548 42 Of adding admonition to instruction 548 43 Of parents wearisomnesse in instructing their children 550 44 Of parents reprouing their children 550 45 Of parents cockering their children 551 46 Of correcting children 552 47 A direction to parents in correcting their children 555 48 Of parents too much indulgency 557 49 Of parents too much scuerity in correcting their children 558 50 Of parents care in prouiding fit callings for their children 558 51 Direction for parents in prouiding callings for their children 560 52 Of the extremes contrary to a parents lawfull care in prouiding fit callings for his children 561 53 Of parents care in prouiding fit mariages for their children 563 54 Direction to parents in prouiding mariages 564 55 Of the extremes contrary to parents care in prouiding fit mariages for their children 564 56 Of parents prouiding a stocke for callings and mariages of their children 565 57 Of the extremes contrary to a parents prouiding portions for his children 566 58 Of parents last speech to their children 567 59 Of parents last blessing to their children 569 60 Of parents care to commend their children to some faithfull friends 569 61 Of parents neglect of their children for time to come 570 62
to giue an account of their seruice Though by our seruice we haue neuer so well approued our selues to men yet if we haue not therein had respect vnto God and approued our selues to him with what face may we appeare before his dreadfull iudgement seat Can the fauour of those whom we haue pleased in this world protect and shelter vs from the fury of Gods displeasure Behold the folly of such Gouernours as wholly apply themselues to the fancie of their people yea though it be against the Lord and his word This was Adams folly who at his wiues motion did eat of the forbidden fruit This was Aarons folly who to please the people erected an Idoll And this was Sauls folly who against Gods expresse prohibition suffered his people to take some of the spoile of the Amalekites The like may be said of Ioash who hearkned to his Princes to set vp Idols and of Pilate who to please the people against his conscience deliuered Christ to be crucified The fearefull issue of this their submission not seasoned with a feare of God but contrary thereunto may be a warning to all superiours to take heed how they seeke to please them that are vnder them more than God who is aboue them The issue of Adams Aarons Sauls and Ioash his base submission is noted by the Holy Ghost in their seuerall histories Of Pilate it is recorded that being brought into extreme necessitie he laid violent hands vpon himselfe Neither is it to be accounted folly only in superiours to submit themselues to their inferiours against the Lord but also in inferiours to their superiours for thereby they shew that they feare man more than God which Christ expresly forbiddeth his friends to doe The captaines which went to fetch Eliah obeyed their king therein but what got they thereby was the king able to saue them from the fire which God sent downe from heauen vpon them The women reproued for offering incense to the Queene of heauen did it not without their husbands yet were they not excused thereby The children and others in the familie submitted themselues to Dathan and Abiram in standing in the doore of their tents at defiance against Moses but because it was not in the Lord but against him they were not exempted from the iudgement Wherefore let all of all sorts set the feare of God as a marke before them to aime at in all their actions Let superiours neither doe any thing to giue content to their inferiours nor suffer any thing to be done for their sakes by their inferiours which cannot stand with the feare of God And let inferiours nor doe nor forbeare to doe at the will of their superiours any thing sweruing from the feare of God but euery one submit themselues one to another in the feare of God §. 7. Of performing the duties of particular callings EPHES. 5. 22. Wiues submit your selues vnto your owne husbands as vnto the Lord. FRom that generall direction concerning mutuall submission the Apostle commeth to certaine particulars by which he exemplifieth the same and teacheth vs that It is not sufficient to performe generall duties of Christianitie vnlesse also we be conscionable in performing the particular duties of our seuerall callings A conscionable performance of those particular duties is one part of our walking worthy of the vocation wherewith we are called and therefore the Apostle for illustration and exemplification thereof doth reckon vp sundry particulars both in this and other Epistles and so doe other Apostles And Titus is charged to teach them God himselfe hath giuen a patterne hereof in his Law for the maine scope of the fifth Commandement tendeth to instruct vs in the particular duties of our seuerall callings Hereby much credit is brought to our profession and the doctrine of God our Sauiour is adorned And much good is hereby both mutually communicated one to another and receiued one from another for our particular places and callings are those bonds whereby persons are firmely and fitly knit together as the members of a naturall body by nerues arteries sinewes veines and the like by which life sense and motion is communicated from one to another Let therefore notice be taken of the particular callings wherein God hath set vs and of the seuerall duties of those callings and conscience be vsed in the practise of them He is no good Christian that is carelesse herein A bad husband wife parent childe master seruant magistrate or minister is no good Christian §. 8. Of the lawfulnesse of priuate functions in a familie Among other particular callings the Apostle maketh choice of those which God hath settled in priuate families and is accurat in reciting the seuerall and distinct orders thereof for a family consisteth of these three orders Husbands Parents Masters all which he Wiues Children Seruants  reckoneth vp yea he is also copious and earnest in vrging the duties which appertaine to them Whence wee may well inferre that The priuate vocations of a family and functions appertaining thereto are such as Christians are called vnto by God and in the exercising whereof they may and must imploy some part of their time For can we thinke that the Holy Ghost who as the Philosophers speake of nature doth nothing in vaine would so distinctly set downe these priuate duties so forcibly vrge them if they did not well become and neerely concerne Christians All the places in Scripture which require family-duties are proofs of the truth of this doctrine The reasons of this doctrine are cleere for the family is a seminary of the Church and common-wealth It is as a Bee-hive in which is the stocke and out of which are sent many swarmes of Bees for in families are all sorts of people bred and brought vp and out of families are they sent into the Church and common-wealth The first beginning of mankinde and of his increase was out of a family For first did God ioyne in mariage Adam and Eue made them husband and wife and then gaue them children so as husband and wife parent and childe which are parts of a family were before magistrate and subiect minister and people which are the parts of a Common-wealth and a Church When by the generall deluge all publike societies were destroyed a familie euen the family of Noah was preserued and out of it kingdomes and nations againe raised That great people of the Iewes which could not be numbred for multitude was raised out of the family of Abram Yea euen to this day haue all sorts of people come from families and so shall to the end of the world Whence it followeth that a conscionable performance of domesticall and houshold duties tend to the good ordering of Church and common-wealth as being meanes to fit and prepare men thereunto Besides a familie is a little Church and a little common-wealth
at least a liuely representation thereof whereby triall may be made of such as are fit for any place of authoritie or of subiection in Church or common-wealth Or rather it is as a schoole wherein the first principles and grounds of gouernment and subiection are learned whereby men are fitted to greater matters in Church or common-wealth Wherupon the Apostle declareth that a Bishop that cannot rule his own house is not fit to gouerne the Church So we may say of inferiours that cannot be subiect in a familie they will hardly be brought to yeeld such subiection as they ought in Church or common-wealth instance Absolom and Adoniah Dauids sonnes This is to be noted for satisfaction of certaine weake consciences who thinke that if they haue no publike calling they haue no calling at all and thereupon gather that all their time is spent without a calling Which consequence if it were good and sound what comfort in spending their time should most women haue who are not admitted to any publike function in Church or common-wealth or seruants children and others who are wholly imployed in priuate affaires of the familie But the forenamed doctrine sheweth the vnsoundnesse of that consequence Besides who knoweth not that the preseruation of families tendeth to the good of Church and common-wealth so as a conscionable performance of houshold duties in regard of the end and fruit thereof may be accounted a publike worke Yea if domesticall duties be well and throughly performed they will be euen enough to take vp a mans whole time If a master of a family be also an husband of a wife and a father of children he shall finde worke enough as by those particular duties which we shall afterwards shew to belong vnto masters husbands and parents may easily be proued So a wife likwise if she also be a mother and a mistris and faithfully endeuour to doe what by vertue of those callings she is bound to doe shall finde enough to doe As for children vnder the gouernment of their parents and seruants in a familie their whole calling is to be obedient to their parents and masters and to doe what they command them in the Lord. Wherefore if they who haue no publike calling be so much the more diligent in the functions of their priuate callings they shall be as well accepted of the Lord as if they had publike offices Yet many therebe who hauing no publike imployment thinke they may spend their time as they list either in idlenesse or in following their vaine pleasures and delights day after day and so cast themselues out of all calling Such are many masters of families who commit all the care of their house either to their wiues or to some seruant and mispend their whole time in idlenesse riotousnesse and voluptuousnesse Such are many mistresses who spend their time in lying a bed attiring themselues and goshipping Such are many young gentlemen liuing in their fathers houses who partly through the too-much-indulgencie and negligence of their parents and partly through their owne headstrong affections and rebellious will runne without restraint whither their corrupt lusts lead them These and such other like to these though by Gods prouidence they be placed in callings in warrantable callings and in such callings as minister vnto them matter enough of imployment yet make themselues to be of no calling Now what blessing can they looke for from the Lord The Lord vseth to giue his blessing to men while they are busied in their callings Iaacobs faithfull seruice to his vncle Laban moued God to blesse him Iosephs faithfulnesse to his master Potiphar was had in remembrance with God who aduanced him to be ruler in Egypt Moses was keeping his father in lawes sheepe when God appeared to him in the bush and appointed him a Prince ouer his people Dauid was sent for from the field where he was keeping his fathers sheepe when he was anointed to be king ouer Israel Elisha was plowing when he was anointed to be a Prophet The shepherds were watching their sheepe when that gladsome tidings was brought to them that the Sauiour of the world was borne Not to insist on any more particulars the promise of Gods protection is restrained to our callings for the charge which God hath giuen to the Angels concerning man is to keepe him in all his waies As for those who haue publike offices in Church or common-wealth they may not thereupon thinke themselues exempted from all family-duties These priuate duties are necessarie duties Though a man be a magistrate or a minister yet if he be an husband or a father or a master he may not neglect his wife children and seruants Indeed they who are freed from publike functions are bound to attend so much the more vpon the priuate duties of their families because they haue more leisure thereunto But none ought wholly to neglect them Iosuah who was a Captaine and Prince of his people and very much imployed in publike affaires yet neglected not his familie for he professeth that he and his house would serue the Lord. It seemeth that Eli was negligent in performing the dutie of a father and Dauid also But what followed thereupon Two of Elies sonnes proued sacrilegious and lewd Priests Two of Dauids sonnes proued very ill common-wealths-men euen plaine traitors §. 9. Of the Apostles order in laying downe the duties of husbands and wiues in the first place There being three especiall degrees or orders in a familie as we heard before the Apostle placeth husband and wife in the first ranke and first declareth their duties and that not without good reason for First The husband and wife were the first couple that euer were in the world Adam and Eue were ioyned in mariage and made man and wife before they had children or seruants So falleth it out for the most part euen to this day in erecting or bringing together a familie the first couple is ordinarily an husband and a wife Secondly most vsually the husband and his wife are the chiefest in a familie all vnder them single persons they gouernours of all the rest in the house Therefore most meet it is that they should first know their dutie and learne to practise it that so they may be an example to all the rest If they faile in their dutie one to another they giue occasion to all the rest vnder them to be carelesse and negligent in theirs Let an husband be churlish to his wife and despise her he ministreth an occasion to children and seruants to contemne her likewise and to be disobedient vnto her yea to be churlish and froward one to another especially to their vnderlings Let a wife be vntrustie and vnfaithfull to her husband let her filch and purloine from him children and seruants will soone take courage or rather boldnesse from her example priuily to steale what they can from their
father and master Thus is their breach of dutie a double fault one in respect of the party whom they wrong and to whom they denie dutie the other in respect of those to whom they giue occasion of sinning Know therefore O husbands and wiues that yee aboue all other in the familie are most bound vnto a conscionable performance of your dutie Greater will your condemnation be if you faile therein Looke to it aboue the rest and by your example draw on your children and seruants if you haue any to performe their duties which surely they will more readily do when they shall behold you as guides going before them and making conscience of your ioynt and seuerall duties §. 10. Of the Apostles order in setting downe inferiours duties in the first place In handling the duties of the first forenamed couple the Apostle beginneth with wiues and layeth downe their particular duties in the first place The reason of this order I take to be the inferiority of the wife to her husband I doe the rather take it so to be because I obserue this to be his vsuall method and order first to declare the duties of inferiours and then of superiours For in handling the duties of children and parents and of seruants and masters he beginneth with the inferiours both in this and in other Epistles which order also S. Peter obserueth yea the law it selfe doth in the first place and that expresly mention the inferiours dutie only implying the superiours to follow as a iust consequence which is this If the inferiour must giue honour and by vertue thereof performe such duties as appertaine thereto then must the superiour carrie himselfe worthy of honour and by vertue thereof performe answerable duties Quest Why should inferiours duties be more fully expressed and placed in the first ranke Answ Surely because for the most part inferiours are most vnwilling to vndergoe the duties of their place Who is not more ready to rule than to be subiect I denie not but that it is a farre more difficult and hard matter to gouerne well than to obey well For to rule and gouerne requireth more knowledge experience wisdome care watchfulnesse diligence and other like vertues than to obey and be subiect He that obeyeth hath his rule laid before him which is the will and command of his superiour in things lawfull and not against Gods will But the superiour who commandeth is to consider not only what is lawfull but also what is most fit meet conuenient and euery way the best yea also he must forecast for the time to come and so farre as he can obserue whether that which is now for the present meet enough may not be dangerous for the time to come and in that respect vnmeet to be vrged Whence it followeth that the superiour in authoritie may sinne in commanding that which the inferiour in subiection may vpon his command doe without sinne Who can iustly charge Ioab with sinne in numbring the people when Dauid vrged him by vertue of his authoritie so to doe Yet did Dauid sinne in commanding it Without all question Saul did sin in charging the people by an oath to eat no food the day that they pursued their enemies a time when they had most need to be refreshed with food as Ionathans words implie and yet did not the people sinne in forbearing witnesse the euent that followed on Ionathans eating though he knew not his fathers charge Who seeth not hereby that it is a matter of much more difficultie to rule well than to obey which is yet further euident by Gods wise disposing prouidence in ordering who should gouerne who obey Commonly the younger for age the weaker for sex the meaner for estate the more ignorant for vnderstanding with the like are in places of subiection but the elder stronger wealthier wiser and such like persons are for the most part or at least should be in place of authority Woe to thee ô land saith Salomon when thy king is a childe And Isaiah denounceth it as a curse to Israel that children shall be their Princes and babes shall rule ouer them and complaineth that women had rule ouer the people Now to returne to the point though it be so that gouernours haue the heauiest burden laid on their shoulders yet inferiours that are under subiection thinke their burden the heauiest and are lothest to beare it and most willing to cast it away For naturally there is in euery one much pride and ambition which as dust cast on the eies of their vnderstanding putteth out the sight thereof and so maketh them affect superiority and authority ouer others and to be stubborne vnder the yoke of subiection which is the cause that in all ages both by diuine and also by humane lawes penalties and punishments of diuers kinds haue beene ordained to keepe inferiours in compasse of their dutie and yet such is the pride of mans heart all will not serue What age what place euer was there which hath not iust cause to complaine of subiects rebellion seruants stubbornnesse childrens disobedience wiues presumption Not without cause therefore doth the Apostle first declare the duties of inferiours Besides the Apostle would hereby teach those who are vnder authority how to moue them that are in authority ouer them to deale equally and kindly not hardly and cruelly with them namely by endeuouring to performe their owne dutie first For what is it that prouoketh wrath rage and fury in gouernours What maketh them that haue authority to deale roughly and rigorously is it not for the most part disobedience and stoutnesse in those that are vnder gouernment though some in authority be so proud so sauage and inhumane as no honour done to them no performance of duty can satisfie and content them but they will as Dauids enemies reward euill for goodnesse yet the best generall direction that can be prescribed to inferiours to prouoke their gouernours to deale well with them is that inferiours themselues be carefull and conscionable in doing their duty first If their gouernours on earth be nothing moued therewith yet will the highest Lord in heauen graciously accept it Lastly men must first learne to obey well before they can rule well for they who scorne to be subiect to their gouernours while they are vnder authority are like to proue intolerably insolent when they are in authority Learne all that are vnder authority how to win your gouernours fauour how to make your yoke easie and your burden light how to preuent many mischiefes which by reason of the power of your superiours ouer you may otherwise fall vpon you First doe ye your duty There are many weighty reasons to moue gouernours first to begin to doe their dutie For First by vertue of their authority they beare Gods image therefore in doing their duty they honour that image Secondly by
flesh he addeth this law Therefore shall a man leaue his father c. In this place these words haue both a literall and a mysticall sense A literall of man and wife A mysticall of Christ and the Church The maine thing which the Apostle aimeth at is to shew how neerely man and wife are linked together that thereby they may the rathet be moued to performe those mutuall and seuerall duties which they owe each to other But because he propounded to husbands and wiues the examples of Christ and the Church as patternes and motiues to them to doe their dutie he applieth that which was first spoken of man and wife vnto Christ and his Church to shew that there being so fit a resemblance betwixt these two couples the patterne propounded is the more pertinent to the purpose and the reason enforced from thence the more forcible Because the opening of the literall sense will giue great light to the mysterie I will first handle this text according to the meaning of the letter The first clause for this cause implieth a necessarie connexion with that which went before The neere vnion of man and wife as well as of Christ and his Church was before noted A wife was said to be as the bodie of a man yea as himselfe Adam called her his flesh and bones Hereupon both Moses and Paul inferre Therefore or For this cause shall a man leaue father Because man and wife are so neere by Gods institution they must also be most deare each to other in their mutuall affection The Man meaning an husband is here in particular mentioned because at the first making of this Law the woman was brought to him to see how he would like her and hauing cast his affection on her he was to be bound hereby to continue that good liking towards her as also because of the preheminencie which man hath aboue his wife Yet is not the man only tied hereby but the wife also the nature and rule of relation requireth as much if a man must inseparably cleaue to his wife the wife must answerably cleaue to her husband These words shall leaue father and mother are neither generally to be taken of all duties as if no dutie were to be performed to parents by children after they are maried nor simply as if indeed parents were vtterly to be forsaken but they are meant 1. Of that daily seruice which children vnder their parents gouernment performe vnto them seeking to please them in all things When children are maried then their daily attendance must be vpon their wiues or husbands taking care how to please them 2. Of erecting a new family for which end their parents house must be left and the husband and wife must dwell each with other 3. Of the difference to be put betwixt parents and wife or husband So as if by any ineuitable occasion it should so fall out that a man must leaue his parent or his wife as in case parent and wife were both giuing vp the Ghost and in places so farre remote as the husband could not possibly be with both yet both instantly desired his companie by this Law he must leaue his parent and cleaue to his wife Hereby then the bond of mariage is declared to be the most inuiolable bond that can be For all men know that the bond betwixt parent and childe is a firme and inuiolable bond but the bond betwixt husband and wife is more firme and inuiolable To set forth the firmnesse of the mariage bond he addeth this Emphacicall phrase shall be ioyned or as the word properly cording to the naturall notation thereof signifieth shall be glued to his wife Things well glued together are as fast firme and close as if they were one intire peece Yea we obserue by experience that a table will oft times cleaue in the whole wood before it will part asunder where it is glued so as an husband ought to be as firme to his wife as to himselfe and she to him Fitly doth this agree with that which followeth they two shall be one flesh Our English cannot well expresse the Greeke in good sense word for word which is thus they two shall beinto or in one flesh the meaning is They which were two before mariage by the bond of mariage are brought into one flesh to be euen as one flesh as neerely vnited as the parts of the same body and the same flesh This vnitie is not in regard of carnall copulation for if they be maried they are one flesh though they neuer know one another nor in regard of procreation because one childe commeth from them both for though they neuer haue childe yet are they one flesh but in regard of Gods institution who hath set it downe for a law and as another nature that man and wife should be so neere one to another Their consent in mariage by vertue of Gods institution maketh them to be one flesh Well doth our English note the emphasis of the originall in this particle THEY they two which sheweth that the bond of mariage knitteth only two together one man and one woman and no more This Law setteth forth the Vnion betwixt man and wife Therein three things are noted concerning the state of mariage 1. The praeeminencie of it a man shall leaue father and mother 2. The firmnesse of it and be ioyned to his wife 3. The neerenesse of it they two shall be one flesh §. 80. Of preferring husband or wife before parents The first point sheweth that A wife or an husband must be preferred before parents The examples of Leah and Rachel yea and of Micol are commendable in this respect 1. The bond of mariage is more ancient more firme more neere There was husband and wife before there was parent and child and there is a time when parents children may depart one from another and that while both liue but no time wherein man and wife may part asunder till death part them And children though they come from the flesh of their parents yet are made two so as of one are two but husbands and wiues though they were two before yet are made one so as of two is one What wrong then doe such parents vnto their children as keepe them euen after they are maried so strait vnder subiection as they cannot freely performe such duty as they ought to their husband or their wife This is more then a parents authority reacheth vnto Yet many thinke that their children owe as much seruice to them after they are maried as before which is directly against this law Greater is the wrong and more sinfull is the practise of such as keepe their children from their husbands or from their wiues The match say they falleth out much worse then we looked for But this should haue beene looked to more carefully before hand After mariage it is
too late to seeke such a redresse On the other side there be many children who so respect their parents as they neglect their husband or their wife Some husbands will bestow what they can on their parents and keepe their wiues very bare suffering them to want necessaries not caring how they vex and grieue them so they please their parents Some wiues also will priuily purloine from their husbands to bestow on their parents Others can neuer tarrie out of their parents houses but as oft as they can goe thither The ancient Romans to shew how vnmeet this was had a custome to couer the brides face with a yellow veile and so soone as she was out of her fathers house to turne her about and about and so to carrie her to the house of her husband that she might not know the way to her fathers house againe All those pretenses of loue to parents are more preposterous then pious and naturall affection beareth more sway in such then true religion Their pretence of piety to parents is no rust excuse for that iniury they doe to husband and wife §. 81. Of the firmnesse of the matrimoniall bond The second point concerning the firmnesse of the mariage knot in these words shall be ioyned to his wife affor deth two doctrines 1. Man and wife must associate themselues together by continuall cohabitation for this end they leaue their parents family and erect a new family 2. Man and wife are ioyned together by an inuiolable bond It must neuer be cut asunder till death cut it Body and soule must be seuered one from another before husband and wife Be carefull therefore to preserue this indissoluble knot and so liue together as with comfort you may liue together because you may not part §. 82. Of two only to be ioyned together in mariage The third point concerning the neerenesse of man and wife in these words they two shall be one flesh affordeth two other doctrines 1. Mariage can be but betwixt two one man and one woman for it is impossible that more then two should so neerely and firmely be ioyned together as man and wife are Euery word almost in this law proueth this doctrine For it saith a man not men to a wife not to wiues to his wife not to anothers wife two not more then two they two not any two one flesh not many fleshes Obiect This particle two is not in the law as Moses recordeth it Answ It is there necessarily implied for at that time there were but two in the world God then speaking of them meaneth but two The same spirit that guided Moses guided also the Euangelists and the Apostles so as by their inserting of this particle two it is certaine that it was intended by Moses as the particle only which Christ putteth into this text him only shalt thou serue Quest Why did God at first make but one man and one woman Answ The Prophet answereth that he might seeke a godly seed If therefore there be more then two it is an adulterous seed which proceedeth from thence §. 83. Of Polygamy and Bigamy Can Polygamy the hauing of many wiues or Bigamy the hauing of two wiues at once haue any good warrant against such an expresse law Are not both of them against the first institution of mariage so as we may say from the beginning it was not so Yea also and against other particular lawes Lamech one of Cains cursed stocke was the first that we read of to haue presumed against that ancient law Obiect Afterwards many Patriarkes and other Saints tooke that liberty vnto themselues Answ It was their sinne and a great blemish in them The common error of the time their vnsatiable desire of increase made them fall into it Many inconueniences followed thereupon neither can it be thought but that much mischiefe must needes follow vpon hauing more wiues then one for whereas God at first made a wife to be as an helpe vnto man two or more wiues cannot but be a great griefe and vexation vnto him by reason of that emulation that is betwixt them Through Hagars meanes was Sarah stirred against Abraham and Abraham grieued at Sarahs words Though Leah and Rachel were sisters yet great were their emulations the like whereof is noted of Peninnah and many others Considering the hainousnesse of this sinne our lawes haue iustly made it felony for a man to haue more wiues then one or a woman more husbands §. 84. Of the neere coniunction of man and wife together 2. The neerest of all other are husband and wife one to another Euery clause in the forenamed law proueth as much 1. Parents must be left for wife who neerer then parent and childe if man and wife be neerer then the neerest then they are the neerest of all 2. A man is glued to his wife This metaphor setteth forth the neernesse of a thing as well as the firmnesse of it for things glued together are as one intire thing 3. Man and wife are one flesh many of one are made two but no two so neerely and truly made one as man and wife As God hath limited a propinquity and vnity of things so are they to be accounted but God hath thus neerely knit man and wife together and made them one flesh Those whom GOD hath ioyned together saith Christ of man and wife in which respect matrimoniall coniunction is called the couenant of God so as this couenant cannot be released by any no not by the mutuall consent of man and wife Those whom GOD hath ioyned together let no man put asunder yet may many other couenants made betwixt partie and partie be released and disanulled by mutuall consent of both parties 1. This sheweth that the transgressions of man and wife one against another are of all the most hainous more then of friend fellow brother childe parent or any other Who would not cry fie vpon that child that hates his parent or fie vpon that parent that hates his childe The heathen sauages would not thinke them worthy of humane society What then may be thought of the man that hateth his wife or the wife that hateth her husband Apply this to all other transgressions and well note how the Lord is a witnesse thereof 2. This also sheweth how monstrous a thing it is to sow any seeds of discord and stirre debate betwixt man and wife The deuils instruments they are therein and a diabolicall spirit is in them For Satan most laboureth to vnloose those knots which the Lord knitteth most firmly Children of seuerall venters and seuerall friends of each partie are much faultie herein Cursed be they all before the Lord. 3. This neere coniunction betwixt man and wife is a great motiue to stirre them both vp cheerefully to performe all the duties which God requireth of either of them For thereby they doe dutie and
you I say to all To this purpose many precepts giuen to whole Churches and to all sorts of people are set downe in the singular number as giuen to one as Awake THOV that sleepest THOV standest by faith be not thou high minded c. The life and power of Gods word consisteth in this particular application thereof vnto our selues This is to mixe faith with hearing faith I say whereby we doe not only beleeue the truth of Gods word in generall but also beleeue it to be a truth concerning our selues in particular and thus will euery precept thereof be a good instruction and direction on to vs to guide vs in the way of righteousnesse euery promise therein will be a great incouragement and consolation to vs to vphold vs and to make vs hold on and euery iudgement threatned therein will be a curbe and bridle to hold vs in and to keepe vs from those sinnes against which the iudgements are threatned But otherwise if we bring not the word home to our own soules it will be as a word spoken into the aire vanishing away without any profit to vs. Nothing maketh the word lesse profitable then the putting of it off from our selues to others thinking that it concernes others more then our selues That we may make the better vse of this doctrine let vs obserue both what are generall duties belonging to all Christians and apply them as particular to our selues and also what duties appertaine to such persons as are of our place calling and condition and more especially apply them to our selues let all manner of husbands and all manner of wiues of what ranke or degree soeuer they be that shall read the duties hereafter following know that they are spoken to them in particular Let Kings and Queenes Lords and Ladies Ministers and their wiues Rich men and their wiues Poore men and their wiues Old men and their wiues Young men and their wiues all of all sorts take them as spoken to them in particular It is not honour wealth learning or any other excellency nor meanes of place pouerty want of learning or any other like thing that can exempt an husband from louing his wife or a wife from reuerencing her husband He that saith euery one excepteth not any one Therefore euery one in particular doe yee so The like application may be made to all Parents and children Masters and seruants concerning their duties §. 95. Of euery ones looking to his owne dutie especially In the forenamed application an eye must be had rather to the dutie which we owe and ought to be performed by vs to others then to that which is due to vs and others ought to performe to vs for the Apostle saith not to the husband see that thy wife reuerence thee but see that thou loue her so to the wife For this purpose the holy Ghost presseth particular duties vpon those particular persons who ought to performe them as Subiection on wiues loue on husbands and so in others This therefore is especially to be considered of thee how thou maist shew thy selfe blamelesse I denie not but that one ought to prouoke another and one to helpe another in what they can to performe their dutie especially superiours who haue charge ouer others but the most principall care of euery one ought to be for himselfe and greatest conscience to be made of performing his owne duty 1. It is more acceptable before God and more commendable before men to doe duty then to exact duty As in matters of free charity so also of bounden duty It is more blessed to giue then to receiue In particular it is better for an husband to be a good husband then to haue a good wife so for a wife To haue others faile in duty to vs may be an heauy crosse for vs to faile in our dutie to others is a fearefull curse 2. Euery one is to giue an account of his owne particular duty That which the Prophet speaketh of father and sonne may be applied to husband and wife and to all other sorts of people If a father doe that which is lawfull and right he is iust he shall surely liue if he beget a sonne that doth not so he shall surely die his bloud shall be vpon him Againe if a father doe that which is not good he shall die in his iniquity but if his sonne doe that which is lawfull and right he shall surely liue The righteousnesse of the righteous shall be vpon himselfe and the wickednesse of the wicked shall be vpon himselfe That this shall be so betwixt husband and wife may be gathered out of these words Two shall be in one bed the one shall be taken the other left Let this be noted against the common vaine apologies which are made for neglect of duty which is this Dutie is not performed to me why shall I doe dutie when my husband doth his dutie I will doe mine saith the wife And I mine saith the husband when my wife doth hers What if he neuer doe his dutie and so be damned wilt thou neuer doe thine This looking for of dutie at others hands makes vs the more carelesse of our owne Doe you therefore O husbands looke especially to your owne duties doe you loue your wiues and you ô wiues looke you to yours especially doe you reuerence your husbands For this end let husbands read those duties most diligently which concerne husbands and wiues those which concerne wiues Let not the husband say of the wiues duties there are goodlessons for my wife and neglect his owne nor the wife say the like of husbands duties and not regard her owne This is it that maketh the subiection of many wiues very harsh and irkesome to them because their husbands that vrge and presse them thereto shew little or no loue to them at all and this is it that maketh many husbands very backwards in shewing loue because their wiues which expect much loue shew little or no reuerence to their husbands Wherefore Let euery one of you in particular so loue his wife euen as himselfe and the wife see that she reuerence her husband §. 96. Of the meaning of the first verse of the sixt Chapter FRom those particular duties which concerne husbands and wiues the Apostle proceedeth to lay down such as concerne children and parents As before he laid downe wiues duties before husbands so here he beginneth with childrens who are inferiour to their parents and that for the same reasons which were rendred before Besides children are the fruits of matrimoniall coniunction therefore fitly placed next vnto Man and Wife That which concerneth children is laid downe in the sixt Chapter of Eph. vers 1 2 3. The meaning whereof we will distinctly open EPHES. 6. 1. Children obey your parents in the Lord for this is right The first word children is in the originall as proper a word at could be vsed
for according to the notation of it it signifieth such as are begotten and borne Answerable is the other word parents which signifieth such as beget and bring forth children Yet are they not so strictly to be taken as if none but such as begat and brought forth or such as are begotten and brought forth of them were meant for vnder the title parents he includeth all such as are in the place of naturall parents as Grandfathers and Grandmothers Fathers in law and Mothers in law Foster-fathers and Foster-mothers Guardians Tutors and such like gouernors and vnder the title children he compriseth Grand-children Sonnes and daughters in law Wards Pupils and such like For there is an honour and a subiection due by all who are in place of children to all such as are in place of parents though in a different kinde as we shall after shew This word children which in the originall is of the neuter gender doth further include both sexes males and females sonnes and daughters so as either of them are as carefully to apply the duties here set forth to themselues as if in particular both kindes had beene expressed He expresseth parents in the plurall number to shew that he meaneth here also both sexes father and mother as the law expresseth both and addeth this relatiue particle your as by way of restraint to shew that euery child is not bound to euery parent so by way of extent to shew that whatsoeuer the estate of parents be honourable or meane rich or poore learned or vnlearned c. their owne children must not be ashamed of them but yeeld all bounden dutie to them if they be parents to children they must be honoured by children The word Obey vnder which all duties of children are comprised according to the Greeke notation signifieth with an humble submission to hearken that is to attend and giue heed to the commandements reproofes directions and exhortations which are giuen to them and that with such a reuerend respect of the parties who deliuer them as they make themselues conformable thereto A dutie proper to inferiours and implieth both reuerence and obedience the verbe noteth out Obedience the preposition Reuerence Vnder this word Obey the Apostle comprehendeth all those duties which thorowout the Scripture are required of children as is manifest by his owne exemplification thereof in the second verse by the word honour which the law vseth so as this word obey is to be taken in as large an extent as that word honour Quest Why is obedience put for all the rest Answ 1. Because it is the hardest of all the rest and that which children are loathest to performe they who willingly yeeld to this will sticke at no duty 2. Because it is the surest euidence of that honour which a childe oweth to his parent and so of performing the fift commandement 3. Because children are bound to their parents the duties which they performe are not of curtesie but necessity Their parents haue power to command and exact them The clause added in the Lord is in effect the same which was vsed before as vnto the Lord and it noteth forth a limitation direction and instigation a limitation shewing that childrens obedience to their parents is to be restrained to the obedience which they owe to Christ and may not goe beyond the limits thereof a direction shewing that in obeying their parents they must haue an eye to Christ and so obey them as Christ may approue thereof an instigation shewing that parents beare the image of Christ and in that respect children must the rather obey their parents The last clause of this verse for this is right is an expresse reason to inforce the forenamed point of obedience and it is drawne from equity and sheweth that it is a point agreeable to all law yea that in way of recompence it is due and if children be not obedient to parents they doe that which is most vniust they defraud their parents of their right The former phrase in the Lord implying one reason this plainly noteth out another as the first particle for declareth §. 97. Of the meaning of the second verse EPHES. 6. 2. Honour thy father and mother which is the first commandement with promise THe very words of the fift commandement are here alleaged by the Apostle as a confirmation of the forenamed reason that it is iust and right to obey parents because God in the morall law enioyneth as much The law is more generall then the Apostles precept for the law compriseth vnder it all those duties which all kinde of inferiours owe to their superiours whether they be in family church or common wealth but the Apostles precept is giuen only to one kinde of inferiours in the family yet the argument is very sound and good from a generall to a particular thus All inferiours must honour their superiours therefore children their parents By adding the expresse words of the law the Apostle sheweth that the subiection which he required of children is no yoke which he of his owne head put on their neckes but that which the morall law hath put on them so as this may be noted as a third reason namely Gods expresse charge in his morall law If I should handle this law according to the full extent thereof I should wander too farre from the Apostles scope I will therefore open it no further then it may concerne the point in hand viz. the duty of children Honour compriseth here all those duties which children in any respect owe to their parents It implieth both an inward reuerend estimation and also an outward dutifull submission Yea it implieth also recompence and maintenance Honour in relation to parents is vsed for two reasons especially 1. To shew that parents beare Gods image for honour is properly due to God alone to the creature it is due only as it standeth in Gods roome and carieth his image 2. To shew that it is an honour to parents to haue dutifull children euen as it is a dishonour to them to haue disobedient children Both father and mother are expresly mentioned to take away all pretence from children of neglecting either of them for through the corruption of nature we are prone to seeke after many shifts to exempt vs from our bounden dutie and if not in whole yet in as great a part as we can Some might thinke if they honour their father who is their mothers head they haue done what the law requireth others may thinke they haue done as much if they honour their mother who is the weaker vessell but the law expressing father and mother condemneth him that neglecteth either of them Yet to shew that if opposition should arise betwixt them and by reason thereof both could not be obeyed together the father commanding what the mother forbiddeth the father is to be preferred especially if it be not against the Lord the father
denieth it to them so farre as he seeth it will turne to their hurt Whensoeuer therefore God bestoweth any temporall blessing on his Saints it is a token of his favour and whensoeuer he denieth any the very deniall is also a fruit of his fauour Herein is it verified that All things worke together for good to them that loue God so as if they abound it shall goe well with them if they want it shall goe well with them if they be in high place it shall goe well with them if in meane place it shall got well with them if they be at libertie if in prison if they be in health if sicke in what estate soeuer it shall goe well with them 6. Quest How is it then that Saints are oft brought to such extermities that they are forced to complaine that it is very ill with them Answ There is flesh and bloud in them by reason of the weaknesse whereof they are forced to complaine but the present apprehension of weake flesh is not sufficient to impeach the truth of Gods promise they consider not in their present extremitie what is Gods minde what his manner of dealing with them how needfull it is that so they should be dealt withall what end and issue the Lord will giue in truth it is better with them then they wot of Some weightie reasons there be which moue God to bring them to that extremitie wherein they are and those respecting his owne glorie or the edification of others or their owne good as curing some dangerous disease manifesting the grace of God bestowed vpon them drawing them neerer to God making them long the more for heauen with the like §. 104. Of long-life how farre forth it is a blessing Concerning the second branch of Gods promise long-life other questions are to be resolued 1. Quest Is long-life a blessing Answ Yea else would not God here and in other places haue promised it as a reward nor haue bestowed it on his Saints The reasons to proue it to be a blessing may be drawne to three heads 1. Gods glorie 2. the good of the Church where they liue 3. their owne good 1. Gods glorie is much aduanced by the long life of the Saints for the longer they liue the more they doe themselues obserue Gods wonderfull workes and the more they doe make them knowne and declare them to others But in the graue all is forgotten 2. Gods Church is greatly edified thereby in which respect the Apostle saith to abide in the flesh is more needfull for you In the Saints that is true which Elihu saith should be namely that daies speake and multitude of yeeres teach wisdome The longer the Saints liue the more good they doe but after death they doe none when the night commeth no man can worke vpon which ground the Apostle exhorteth to doe good while we haue time 3. The Saints by long liuing purchase to themselues great honour and dignitie among Gods people and a strong stedfast confidence in God Men regard a good old seruant much more will God Two strong props haue old Saints to establish them and make them bold one is a remembrance of Gods former fauours whereby their hope of eternall life is made more sure vnto them another is a kinde of present expectation of the accomplishment of Gods promises which they haue long waited for By this it appeares that this particular promise is no light matter of small moment but a strong motiue to stirre vp children to obedience §. 105. Of long life prouing a curse to the wicked 2. Quest Why then is long life giuen to many wicked ones and why are many Saints cut off Answ Long life is of the same kinde that prosperitie is it may be turned to a curse as well as proue a blessing The wicked by liuing long on earth make their sins grow to the full as is implied of the Amorite they make their name to stinke the more on earth as a carion the longer it remaineth aboue ground the more it stinketh and they cause the greater torment in hell to be inflicted vpon them for as sinne is increased so shall that torment be increased The righteous haue their daies shortned for their good when they are shortned and that in these and such like respects 1. That they may be taken from the euill to come 2. That they might be made an example to others 3. That by a temporall death eternall condemnation might be auoided 4. That their chiefest and greatest reward might be hastened §. 106. Of limiting the promises of temporall blessings Thus we see there may be iust cause to alter as the former branch of this promise prosperitie so the latter branch of it long-life and yet no wrong thereby redound to the righteous nor benefit to the wicked 3. Quest Is not the truth of the promise impeached thereby Answ No whit at all For first all promises of temporall blessings are limited with such a condition as this if the performance of it may stand with Gods honour and the good of the partie to whom it is made 2. God doth neuer simply depriue his Saints of that which is promised but only in stead of it giueth a better as in taking away wealth he giueth the more store of grace in restraining liberty of body he giueth freedome of conscience with affliction he giueth patience by taking away this temporall life he giueth eternall life God herein dealeth as if one who hauing promised so much iron should in stead thereof giue as much siluer or for siluer giue gold and so for one pound giue the worth of hundreds or thousands §. 107. Of appropriating prosperity and long-life to the obedience which children yeeld to their parents 4. Quest Why is long-life and prosperity appropriated to this kinde of righteousnesse Answ It is not so appropriated to this as if it appertained to no other for it is elsewhere in generall promised to the obseruers of the whole law and to other particular branches thereof beside this yet in these and such like particular respects is it applied to the obedience of children 1. Because obedience to parents is one of the surest euidences of our conformity to the whole law in that thereby we shew our respect of Gods image and lay a good foundation for the performing of all dutie to man 2. Because a childes performing of his dutie to his parents is vnder God an especiall meanes that they doe well and liue long for as rebellious children make their parents with griefe to come the sooner to their graues so dutifull children make them to continue the longer in prosperity the Lord in recompence promiseth to such a childe prosperity and long life 3. Because parents are an especiall meanes to procure the welfare and long life of their children partly by their prouident care as Noami said to Ruth
shall I not seeke rest for thee that it may be well with thee and partly by their instant praier for the faithfull praier of parents is of great force with God for dutifull children whence hath risen the custome of childrens asking their parents blessing and of parents blessing their children In this respect the law thus setteth forth the blessing of the fift commandement they shall prolong thy daies 4. Because disobedience to parents bringeth much mischiefe on childrens heads and oft shorteneth their daies and that many waies 1. In that parents are oft prouoked by their childrens disobedience to disinherit them at least to allow them the lesse portion so as hereby it goeth not so well with them yea some are prouoked to bring their rebellious children to the Magistrate who by Gods law was to cut them off so as thereby their life is shortened 2. In that parents are prouoked to complaine vnto God of their childrens disobedience and God thereby moued both to lay heauie iudgements vpon such children in their life time and also to shorten their daies for parents complaint doth make a loud crie in Gods eares It is said that God by cutting off Abimelech with an vntimely death rendred the wickednesse which he did to his father 3. In that when parents are too indulgent ouer their children God doth punish the sinne both of parent and childe by shortning the childes daies Instance the examples of Hophni and Phinehas Absolom and Adonijah 4. In that disobedience to parents is a sinne that seldome goeth alone for an vndutifull childe is commonly a verie lewd person many other waies Considering the prouenesse of our nature to all sinne it cannot be auoided but that they who in the beginning shake off the yoake of gouernment should run headlong into all riot loosenesse and licentiousnesse thus then sinne being added vnto sinne it must needs bring mischiefe vpon mischiefe till at length life be cut off Wherefore in that these mischiefes are auoided by performing due obedience to parents it may well be said that it shall be well with obedient children and they shall liue long §. 108. Of Gods ordering his fauours so as they may appeare to be true blessings The particular branches of Gods promise hauing beene distinctly opened we will consider them ioyntly together for they doe exceedingly amplifie one another prosperity sweetens long life and makes it acceptable otherwise to liue long namely in misery and wretchednesse is very irksome and grieuous Againe long life added to prosperity maketh it so much the greater blessing For a good thing the longer it continueth the better it is If prosperity were but as a flower soone gone the very thought of the vanity thereof would much diminish the ioy and comfort of it But both of them ioyned together doe shew that this is no small blessing which is promised From the connexion of them both together I obserue that God so ordereth his fauours as they appeare to be true blessings tending indeed to the good of those vpon whom he bestoweth them Thus when God gaue Abraham a sonne he established his couenant with him that this gift might be a true blessing The like I might instance in all the children of promise as Sampson Salomon Iohn Baptist c. So in other fauours When God added fifteene yeares to Hezekiahs life he also promised him deliuerance from his enemies and peace and truth all his daies And when God gaue Dauid a kingdome he gaue him great victories and long life and established his kingdome to his posterity so also dealt he with Salomon But not to insist on any more particulars excellently is this doctrine confirmed in the 28 Psalme Thus God will shew that in loue he bestoweth euen the temporall blessings which he giueth to his Saints that accordingly they may esteeme them and that their hearts may be the more inlarged both to admire his goodnesse and to be thankfull for the same This vse we must make of those things which the Lord is pleased to bestow vpon vs as of long life good health honour peace plenty liberty and all prosperity we must receiue and vse them as God bestoweth them namely as tokens of his fauour and thereby be the more stirred vp to performe the duties he requireth of vs and not abuse them to his dishonour and our owne hurt but rather so as he may haue honour and we profit thereby §. 109. Of Gods high account of dutifull children More particularly by this promise we may learne what high esteeme and great account God maketh of dutifull children and of that obedience which they performe to their parents which ought so much the more to prouoke children to all obedience if at least they haue any care of Gods fauour and of the tokens of his loue Oh consider this all yee that haue parents to honour consider how carefull how earnest God is euery way by all meanes to draw you to obedience he contents not himselfe to vrge the equity of the point the place of your parent the charge that himselfe hath giuen but most presseth your owne profit and that not only in hope for the time to come but euen in present fruition for this life and that because we through our childishnesse are most affected with things sensible and present dealing with vs as a tender father who prouideth not only a good calling and a faire in heritance for his childe but giueth him also plums peares and such things as for the present he is delighted withall the more to allure him §. 110. Of childrens doing good to themselues by honouring their parents Children may further learne out of this promise that in performing their dutie they doe good not only to their parents but also to themselues they procure their owne welfare and long-life What egregious fooles then are disobedient children they regard neither God their parents nor themselues but depriue themselues of their eternall happinesse hinder their welfare and shorten their daies Fitly hereupon I may applie to vndutifull children these words of the Psalmist Marke the obedient childe for the end of him is peace but the rebellious shall be destroyed he shall be cut off and these of the wise-man I know that it shall be well with the dutifull childe but it shall not be well with the disobedient he shall not prolong his daies and these of the Prophet Say ye to the obedient childe it shall be well with him he shall eat the fruit of his doings but woe to the transgressor it shall be ill with him §. 111. Of parents doing good to their children by keeping them vnder obedience Out of this promise parents may learne how to doe good for their children how to prouide for their welfare and long to preserue their life on earth a thing whereunto most parents are naturally giuen and whereof they are much desirous namely by teaching
children their dutie by keeping them vnder obedience thus haue they Gods promise to assure them that it shall goe well with their children and that they shall liue long When parents are vpon their death-beds they may rest more securely vpon this promise then vpon great store of treasure laid vp for them and great reuenues reserued for them Many parents neglect themselues they moile and toile they carke and care they pinch and spare to leaue their children store of wealth thinking thereby to doe good to their children when as withall they too much cocker their children giue the reines vnto them and care not how little dutie they performe Gods curse will lie vpon all the store that is laid vp for such children as a fire to consume it all Doth not daily experience verifie the truth hereof The iudgements which are laid on some such children doe euidently manifest Gods iust indignation against all Let not rich men therefore thinke they haue left their children well enough if they leaue them a large portion but rather if they haue obserued them to be obedient children and if poore mens children be such let them not feare but that it shall goe well with them It is said that a good trade is better then house and land but by vertue of this promise we may say that obedience in a childe is better then trade and all this is the trade of a childes way which parents should teach children Wherefore as parents are desirous of their childrens good so they ought to be wise in procuring it which is by teaching them this trade of obedience and so they shall bring much comfort to themselues while they liue and good to their children after them §. 112. Of the perpetuitie of the substance of such things as in their circumstances respecting the Iewes are vanished In laying downe this particular promise the Apostle in stead of the limitation thereof vnto the Iewes in these words in the land which the Lord thy God shall giue thee putteth a generall word which extendeth it to all nations namely this in the earth whence I gather that The substance of these things which in some circumstances were after a peculiar manner restrained to the Iewes remaineth in force to all Christians The substance of this promise was that it should goe well with obedient children while here on earth they liued and in this welfare they should long liue The circumstance was that in Canaan they should inioy that blessing Though Christians liue not in Canaan which is the circumstance yet well it shall goe with them and long they shall liue which is the substance Thus though the circumstance of Gods couenant with Abraham which was circumcision be abolished yet the substance which is to be our God and the God of our seed remaineth This might further be exemplified in many hundred instances for the substance of all the Iewish sacrifices and Sacraments both ordinarie and extraordinarie of their Sabbaths of their fasts of their feasts and the like remaine though the circumstances as shadowes be vanished away Hence is it that many promises made to them are applied by the Apostles to Christians as this I will not faile thee nor forsake thee and in generall it is said The promise to you and to your children and to all that are afarra off Hereby we may learne what vse to make of the old Testament euen of those promises and priuiledges which in some particular respects were appropriated to the Iewes namely by obseruing the substance and distinguishing it from the circumstance thus shall we finde that to be true which the Apostle speaketh of all the things which were written afore time namely that they were written for our learning In this respect the same Apostle saith of the things recorded of Abraham they were not written for his sake alone and againe of the things recorded of the Israelites they are written for our admonition By this we may learne how to applie the preface to the ten Commandements which mentioneth the deliuerance of Israel out of the bondage of Egypt Pray therefore for the spirit of illumination to discerne betwixt substance and circumstance in reading the old Testament especially §. 113. Of the determined period of mans life Hauing declared such orthodoxall points as this text affordeth I will further note out two hereticall positions which our aduersaries thence raise One is of those that to the dishonour of him whom God raised vp to be a worthy instrument in dispelling the mist of Poperie which had much darkned the light of the Gospell call themselues Lutherans the other of Papists The former is this God hath not determined the set period of mans daies but it is in mans power to lengthen or shorten them for if it were otherwise say they this and such like promises of long life were to no purpose nor yet the contrary threatnings of shortning mans daies For full answer hereunto I will first shew that the position it selfe is directly contrarie to the current of Scripture and then discouer the vnsoundnesse of their consequence Touching the determined period of mans daies thus speaketh the Scripture Is there not an appointed time to man on earth are not his daies also as the daies of an hireling Note with what emphasis the point is set forth euen so as if it were a point so cleare as none could doubt of it Note also two metaphors here vsed which doe much cleare the point one taken from souldiers the other from hired seruants That of souldiers is implied in the meaning of the originall word translated appointed time but properly signifieth him that hath his time appointed for warfare or the time it selfe so appointed the other expressed Now we know that these times are appointed to an houre so is the time of mans life In this respect Iob saith againe all the daies of my appointed time will I wait c. where he vseth the same word that before in the same sense To this purpose are these and such like phrases frequently vsed in Scripture determined daies number of daies houre c. Did not the Prophet expresly declare to Hezekiah that he should liue iust 15 yeeres after his sicknesse He could not haue told it if the Lord had not before set that period Christ saith our haires are numbred are not much more our daies Againe he saith who can adde one cubit to his stature Can then any adde to his daies So euident is this point that the heathen noted it Touching their consequence if a mans time be determined all the promises of long life are to no purpose I answer that God who hath set downe the iust time and period of mans life hath also set downe the meanes of attaining to that period Now the time he hath kept secret to himselfe the meanes he hath reuealed to vs. In regard of vs therefore who know not the
time appointed of the Lord it may be said that by vsing such and such meanes we prolong our daies or by doing such and such things we shorten them Now because these meanes only shew them to be long or short Gods decree remaineth firme and stable and is not altred thereby yet this worke of lengthening or shortning is attributed to vs because we doe what lieth in vs thereto and that freely without any compulsion For Gods decree though it cause a necessitie in the euent yet it imposeth no constraint on the will of man but leaueth it as free in regard of the manner of working as if there were no decree at all And herein Gods admirable wisdome is manifested that notwithstanding his determined purpose of matters man hath no ground of excuse to say he was forced to this or that The knowledge of this determined period of mans life is of great vse for it teacheth vs 1. Wholly to submit our selues to God and to be prepared either soone to depart out of this world or long to liue in it as God shall dispose of our time nor desiring longer to liue then God hath appointed nor grieuing to liue so long as he hath appointed 2. Not to feare the threats of any man thereby to be drawne from God 3. To doe Gods worke while we haue time c. §. 114. Of reward promised to obedience that it implieth no merit The other heresie which Papists gather from this text is this Mans obedience is meritorious Answ The reward here promised is no matter of wages and due desert but of meere grace and fauour Of this error I haue elsewhere more largely spoken §. 115. Of the connexion of Parents dutie with Childrens EPHES. 6. 4. And ye fathers prouoke not your children to wrath but bring them vp in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. THe Apostle hauing vrged children to performe their duties to their parents he turneth his speech to parents saying AND ye fathers c. That copulatiue particle AND ioyning an exhortation to parents for performing their duties to the forenamed exhortation made to children giueth vs to vnderstand that Parents are as well bound to dutie as children Their duties indeed be different yet notwithstanding their superioritie and authoritie ouer their children they are bound to dutie All the directions and exhortations throughout the Scripture giuen vnto parents concerning their dutie and all the threatnings denounced and iudgements executed on parents for neglect of their dutie are pregnant proofes of this point Though parents be ouer their children and by them cannot be commanded yet they are vnder God and he it is who hath enioyned them their dutie so as they are bound thereunto as they will answer it to their Father in heauen The authoritie which parents haue is not so much for their owne aduancement as for the better gouerning of their children which being so their verie gouernment is a dutie Object In the morall Law the dutie of children only is expressed Answ Parents dutie as many others duties is by iust and necessarie consequence implied which is equiualent and as much bindeth as if it were expressed It is thus implied They who haue honour must carrie themselues worthie of honour Now the way to carrie themselues worthie of honour is to be carefull in doing dutie to them that honour them This is so equall as it needed not to be exprest Wherefore let Ministers follow this patterne of the Apostle and carrie an euen hand towards all of all sorts let them not be partiall in laying all the burden of dutie on childrens necks and none on parents holding in children verie straitly but leauing parents to their owne will Parents are flesh and bloud as well as children and as prone to transgresse in their place as children in theirs Yea Ministers ought of the two to be more earnest in vrging parents to performe their dutie because they are vnder no such power and authoritie as children are Feare of parents authoritie keepeth children much in awe There is no such thing to keepe parents in awe They will be more readie therefore to take the greater libertie if by feare of God and by a good conscience they be not kept in compasse Now ye ô parents as you looke for honour carrie yourselues worthie of honour as ye looke for dutie from your children performe dutie to them Know that another day euen you shall be called to an account before the highest Iudge your authoritie will then be no pretence to excuse but an euidence to aggrauate your fault For you being elder in yeeres and more eminent in place of more experience and hauing a charge ouer your children ought to be a light to shew them the way an example to allure them that they seeing you carefull and conscionable in performing your dutie may be the more prouoked to performe theirs or at least made ashamed of their neglect of dutie But if you be carelesse of your dutie how can ye expect dutie at their hands nay if by your ill example they haue beene made negligent their bloud shall be required at your hands §. 116. Of the extent of these words Fathers Children Though the word Fathers be here vsed which properly setteth forth naturall parents and of naturall parents the male kinde yet as in many other places it is to be taken in a larger extent euen in as large as this word children was before that so there may be a iust and equall relation betwixt children and parents wherefore both sexes of naturall parents are comprised vnder it euen mother as well as father and they also who are in place of parents whether by mariage as all sorts of fathers and mothers in Law or by appointment as all they who of right haue the custodie and charge of children as Guardians Tutors and other like Gouernours and so it is euerie way answerable to the word parents vsed in the first verse and the word children is also here to be taken in the same extent as it was there §. 117. Of parents prouoking children The next phrase prouoke to wrath is the exposition of one Greeke word which being a compound word cannot by one English word be fully expressed the best and neerest that I can thinke of is exasperate The word signifieth an extremitie in the vse of authoritie euen too much austeritie and seueritie whereby children are prouoked to wrath which because it is a fault it is here expresly forbidden prouoke not c. In this word there is a trope the effect is put for the cause The Apostles meaning is that parents should take such heed of their cariage toward their children as they giue them no occasion to be stirred vp to wrath Vnder this word then are forbidden all such things as may kindle wrath in children as too much austeritie in cariage sowrenesse in countenance threatning and reuiling in words too hard
handling too seuere correction too much restraint of libertie too small allowance of things needfull with the like Parents being flesh and bloud are subiect in this kinde to abuse their authoritie yea euen they who fall into the other extreme of too much indulgencie and cockering of their children are verie prone to fall also into this extreme as many who for the most part too much suffer their children without due restraint and correction to runne into all riot will sometimes on a sudden like Lions flie vpon them and after their owne pleasure correct them and so exceedingly prouoke their children Such as are most cockering are most prone to prouoke to wrath for 1. Such least know how to keepe a meane one will sooner leape out of one extreme into another then goe from an extreme to the meane 2. The children of such are soonest prouoked Quest Is it a thing lawfull and iustifiable in children to be prouoked to wrath by their parents Answ No. This prohibition intendeth no such thing the Apostle hath here to doe with parents and instructeth them how to preuent such mischiefes as their children through their weaknesse may fall into So as here only he sheweth what is vnlawfull for parents not what is lawfull for children Hence then by the way I obserue that Parents must be so watchfull ouer their cariage as thereby they make not their children to sinne If they doe they make their owne sinne the more hainous and also they pull downe vpon their owne pates a farre more heauie vengeance euen the vengeance of their owne sinne and the vengeance of their childes sinne For euery parent is made a watchman ouer his childe If a watchman doe not what he can to hinder the sinne of such as are vnder his charge he pulls their bloud on his owne necke What doe they then that being watchmen minister occasion of sinne to them that are vnder their charge §. 118. Of parents seeking the good of their children That parents by auoiding the rocke of prouoking fall not into the gulfe of cockering the Apostle addeth a BVT which is as a stop vnto them and teacheth them that It is not sufficient for parents to preuent such mischiefes a◠children may fall into but they must also seeke their good All the precepts in Scripture charging parents to seeke their childrens good proue the point Herein lieth a maine difference betwixt the affection which parents and strangers ought to beare toward children and the dutie which one and the other owe to them Meere strangers ought not to prouoke them but parents ought moreouer euery way to seeke their good The maine good which parents ought especially to seeke after in the behalfe of their children is noted out in these words Bring them vp in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. The word translated bring vp properly signifieth to feed or nourish with all needfull things it is the same that is vsed before in the 5. chapter and 29. verse and there translated nourisheth Not vnfitly might the proper signification of the word be here kept as the best Latine translations the French and others haue kept This word ioyned with the others that follow may seeme at first sight to be here placed only to make vp the sense as if he had thus said nurture your childe in the wayes of God But if the scope of the Apostle and signification of the word be well weighed we shall finde that it further implieth a generall dutie which nature it selfe teacheth parents euen this that Parents ought to prouide all needfull things for their children euen such things as tend to the nourishing of their bodies and preseruing of their health and life for this phrase to translate it word for word nourish them in discipline or in instruction is a concise speech implying as much as if he had said nourish and nurture them or feed and instruct them But the Apostle hath thus neerely and concisely ioyned them together to shew that Nurture and instruction is as needfull and profitable as food and apparell §. 119. Of parents nurturing their children The word translated nurture signifieth as well correction as instruction as Heb. 12. 7. If ye endure chastening and 2 Tim. 3. 16. The Scripture is profitable for instruction in righteousnesse Both senses will here stand and our English word as well as the Greeke will beare both for to nurture children is as well to correct them as to instruct them Verie fitly is this aduice in this large acceptation inferred vpon the former prohibition for lest parents should thereupon take occasion to lay the reines vpon their childrens necks and let them run whither they list the Apostle hereby teacheth that Parents as they may not be too austere so neither too remisse They must not prouoke their children to wrath yet they must keepe them vnder discipline The word translated nurture according to the Greeke notation thereof doth further set forth the meane betwixt the two forenamed extremes for it noteth out such a discipline as befitteth a lad or a young childe so as the thing it selfe discipline by instruction and correction keepeth from one extreme of remisnesse the kinde or manner of discipline being such as befitteth a childe keepeth from the other extreme of rigour and crueltie Extremes on either side are dangerous and pernicious and that to parent and childe For remisnesse will make children carelesse of all dutie to God and parent rigour will make them desperate But vertue and safetie consisteth in the meane betwixt both §. 120. Of parents fixing precepts in their childrens mindes This word admonition according to the notation thereof hath a particular relation to the minde and pointeth out an informing and instructing of it It is taken either for the action of admonishing as Tit. 3. 10. reiect an hereticke after the first and second admonition or for the thing admonished in which latter sense most doe here take it yet would I not haue the former cleane excluded for according to the full meaning of the word I take thus much to be intended As parents deliuer good precepts and principles to their children so they must be carefull by forcible and frequent admonitions to fix and settle them in the minde of their children The Law expresseth as much by another metaphor which it vseth in a direction which it giueth to parents saying thou shalt whet or sharpen Gods Lawes vpon thy children that is thou shalt teach them diligently vnto them The more paines is taken in this kinde the lesse labour will be lost That which at first is little heeded by much vrging and pressing will for euer be held as a naile that at one blow scarse entreth with many blowes is knockt vp to the head § 121. Of adding information to discipline The addition of this word admonition vnto nurture is not as some take it a
meere explication of the same point but also a declaration of a further dutie which is this As parents by discipline keepe their children vnder so by information they must direct them in the right way Salomon doth both deliuer the point and also adde a good reason to inforce it for saith he Traine vp a childe in the way that he should goe there is the dutie and when he is old he will not depart from it there is the reason Keeping a childe vnder by good discipline may make him dutifull while the father is ouer him but well informing his vnderstanding and iudgement is a meanes to vphold him in the right way so long as he liueth §. 122. Of parents teaching their children the feare of God The last word of the Lord intimateth the best dutie that a parent can doe for his childe Admonition of the Lord declareth such principles as a parent hath receiued from the Lord and learned out of Gods word such as may teach a childe to feare the Lord such as tend to true pietie and religion whence further I obserue that Parents must especially teach their children their dutie to God Come children saith the Psalmist hearken vnto me I will teach you the feare of the Lord. Of this particular more largely hereafter §. 123. Of the subiection which beleeuing seruants owe. Because there is yet another order in the family besides those which haue been noted before namely the order of Masters seruants the Apostle prescribeth also vnto them their dutie As he began with wiues and children in the two former orders so here he beginneth with seruants who are the inferiours for the same reasons before rendred The Apostle is somewhat copious in laying forth the duties of seruants and in vrging them to performe their dutie and that for two especiall reasons One in respect of those whose masters were infidels another in respect of those whose masters were Saints 1. Many seruants there were in those daies wherein the Gospell was first preached to the Gentiles that by the preaching thereof were conuerted whose masters embraced not the Gospell whereupon those seruants began to conceit that they being Christians ought not to be subiect to their masters that were infidels 2. Other seruants there were whose Masters beleeued the Gospell as well as they now because the Gospell taught that there is neither bond nor free but all are one in Christ Iesus they thought that they ought not to be subiect to their master who was their brother in Christ These two preposterous and presumptuous conceits doth the Apostle intimate and expresly meet with in another place And because they had taken too deepe rooting in the mindes of many seruants the Apostle here in this place laboureth the more earnestly to root them out and that by a thorow pressing vpon their conscience that subiection wherein they are bound to their masters as masters whatsoeuer their disposition were Hereof more afterwards Here by the way note three points 1. The Gospell doth not free inferiours from that subiection to men whereunto by the morall law they are bound 2. Men are ready to turne the grace of God into libertie 3. As errors begin to sprout vp in the Church Ministers must be carefull to root them out §. 124. Of the meaning of the fift verse EPHES. 6. 5. Seruants be obedient to them that are your Masters according to the flesh with feare and trembling in singlenesse of your heart as vnto Christ THis title Seruants is a generall title which may be applied to all such as by any outward ciuill bond or right owe their seruice to another of what sex soeuer the persons themselues be or of what kinde soeuer their seruitude is whether more seruile or liberall Seruile as being borne seruants or sold for seruants or taken in warre or ransomed For of old they were called seruants who being taken in warre were saued from death Liberall as being by voluntary contract made seruants whether at will as some seruing-men iournie men and labourers or for a certaine terme of yeeres as prentises clearkes and such like Wherefore whatsoeuer the birth parentage estate or former condition of any haue beene being Seruants they must be subiect and doe the dutie of seruants the Apostles indefinite title seruants admitteth no exception of any The other title Masters hath as large an extent comprising vnder it both sexes Masters and Mistresses and of these all sorts great and meane rich and poore strong and weake faithfull and infidels true professors and profane superstitious idolatrous hereticall persons or the like so as No condition or disposition of the master exempteth a seruant from performing dutie to him Among other degrees and differences most especially let it be noted that both sexes mistresses as well as masters are here meant that so the duties which are enioyned to be performed to masters may answerably be performed to mistresses so farre as they are common to both and that both by maid-seruants and also by men-seruants that are vnder mistresses In families mistresses are as ordinary as masters and therefore I thought good to giue an especiall item of this Vnder this word obey are comprised all those duties which seruants owe to their masters it is the same word that was before vsed in the first verse and it hath as large an extent here being applied to seruants as it had there being applied to children It sheweth that The rule of seruants as seruants is the will of their Master This clause according to the flesh is by some referred to the action of obedience as if it were added by the Apostle to shew what kinde of obedience seruants owe to their masters namely a ciuill corporall obedience in temporall things opposed to that spirituall obedience which is due to God alone Ans Though distinction may be made betwixt that seruice which is due to God and that which is due to man yet this application of this phrase in this place may giue occasion to seruants to thinke that if they performe outward seruice to their masters all is well they owe no inward feare or honour which is an error that the Apostle doth here mainly oppose against But because this clause according to the flesh is immediatly ioyned to Masters I referre it to the persons to whom obedience is to be giuen and so take it as a description of them as if he had said to fleshly or bodily Masters The Apostle thus describeth masters for these reasons 1. For distinction to shew he meanes such masters as are of the same mould that seruants are so distinguishing them from God who is a spirit thus doth the Apostle distinguish betwixt fathers of our flesh and father of spirits 2. For preuention left seruants might say our masters are flesh and bloud as we are why then should we be subiect to them To meet with
seruants looke for such priuiledges as they haue Another manner of subiection must be performed by seruants The clause annexed as to the Lord is in effect the same with that in the 5. verse as to Christ for by the Lord he here meaneth The Lord Christ But it is added to meet with a secret Obiection For if seruants should say You require us to serue our masters with good will but what if they be hard-hearted and regard not our good will but peruert our good minde The Apostle giueth them this answer Looke not so much to men and their reward as to God and his reward serue men in and for the Lord euen as if you serued God so shall not your seruice be in vaine The inference of the eighth verse vpon this sheweth that this is it which the Apostle here intendeth Learne therefore that An eie is to be cast vpon God euen in those duties which we performe to men and that both for approbation and reward from God The negatiue clause which followeth in these words and not to men is not simplie to be taken for then would it thwart the maine scope of the Apostle in this place but comparatiuely in relation to God and that in two respects 1. That seruice be not done only to men 2. That seruice be not done to men in and for themselues Seruice must be done to God as well as men yea In that seruice which we doe to men we must serue God Men must be serued for the Lords sake because the Lord hath commanded it because they beare the Lords image and stand in his stead in the Lord and vnder the Lord. From this large declaration of the manner of doing seruice to masters note the difference betwixt such seruants as are seruants of men and such as are seruants of Christ 1. They doe all to the eie These all from the heart 2. They seeke to please men These doe the will of God 3. They doe their seruice discontentedly These cheerefully 4. They doe all vpon selfe-loue These with good will §. 127. Of the meaning of the eight verse EPHES. 6. 8. Knowing that whatsoeuer good thing any man doth the same shall he receiue of the Lord whether he be bond or free GReat is the ingratitude of many masters they will exact all the seruice that a poore seruant possibly can doe but slenderly recompence his paines yea it may be very euilly reward the same not affording competent food clothing lodging but frownes checkes and blowes Now to vphold seruants in such straits and to incourage them to doe their dutie whether their masters regard it or no the Apostle in this verse laboureth to raise vp their mindes to God and to shew vnto them that he regardeth them and will sufficiently reward them so as Seruants labour shall not be in vaine in the Lord. To presse this incouragement the more vpon them he setteth it downe as a thing granted by all so cleere as none of them can be ignorant thereof Knowing as if he had said ye all well enough know that what I now say is most true hence note that Gods respect of faithfull seruants is so well knowne as none that haue any vnderstanding can be ignorant thereof The Apostles argument is drawne from the generall to a particular and the generality is noted in the thing done whatsoeuer and in the person that doth it any man But because the generalitie of the thing might be too farre stretched he addeth this limitation good and because the generalitie of the person might be too much restrained he addeth this explication whether bond or free This distinction is vsed because in those daies many seruants were bond-men and bond-women Now the Apostles argument may thus be framed Euery one of what estate and degree soeuer he be shall be rewarded of God for euery good thing he doth be it great or small Therefore euery seruant shall be rewarded of God for euery good seruice The recompence promised is set forth vnder a concise speech the same shall he receiue meaning that he shall receiue a reward for the same that phrase hath relation to the crop which an husbandman receiueth of the corne he sowed which is of the same kinde he sowed the seed being wheat the crop is of wheat the seed being plentifully sowed the crop will be plentifull to the same purpose saith this Apostle in another place whatsoeuer a man soweth that shall he also reape Now to applie this seruants that by their faithfull seruice bring honour and glory to God shall againe receiue honour and glorie If they aske of whom they shall receiue it the Apostle expresly answereth Of the Lord for it is the Lord that said Them that honour me will I honour God will not forget them though their masters may From this verse thus opened I gather these particular obseruations concerning seruants 1. Seruants may and ought to applie vnto themselues generall promises made to Christians Otherwise this generall argument of the Apostle is to little purpose in this place 2. A Christian may be a bond-slaue for the Apostle directeth this incouragement to Christians among whom he presupposeth some to be slaues opposing them to free-men who also were seruants 3. Faithfull seruice performed to men is a good thing for the good things which seruants especially doe is in their seruice 4. As God accepteth not men because they are free so neither reiecteth he them because they are bond It is not the person but the worke that he regardeth 5. The faithfull seruice of seruants is as good seed sowen it will bring forth a good crop The metaphor here intimated implieth as much 6. God is honoured by the faithfull seruice of seruants this is intimated by the application of Gods reward to them for God honoureth none but them which honour him §. 128. Of the connexion of masters duties with seruants EPHES. 6. 9. And ye masters doe the same things vnto them forbearing threatning knowing that your master also is in heauen neither is there respect of persons with him TO the duties of seruants the Apostle adioyneth the duties of masters saying AND ye masters whence learne that Masters are as well bound to dutie as seruants A like doctrine was noted from the connexion of parents duties with childrens there you may see this generall further amplified § 115. 1. Gods law requireth as much for it expresly inioyneth many duties to masters as in the eighth treatise following we shall see 2. So doth also the law of nature which hath tied master and seruant together by a mutuall and reciprocall bond of doing good as well as of receiuing good 3. The law of nations requireth also as much For in all nations where euer there was any good gouernment and where wise and good lawes were made particular lawes of the duties of
face and haue him dwell with him and while his father was in the way he went out to meet him and at first sight fell on his neck and wept a good while a token of great affection That loue which naturally parents beare to their children ought in equitie to breed in children a loue to their parents For loue deserueth loue and most vnworthy are they to be loued who cannot loue againe The loue of parents aboue all others is to be answered with loue on childrens part to the vttermost of their power because it is free great and constant Besides there is a necessitie of loue in children to their parents lest for want thereof their subiection which of all others ought to be most free should turne into slauish seruitude This ought children the rather to labour after because by nature they are nothing so prone to loue their parents as their parents are to loue them Loue is weightie and as weighty things it descendeth Children therefore with conscience of dutie must labour to make supply of this defect and helpe nature by grace I denie not but naturally there is in children a greater loue to their parents then to others yet in comparison of the heat of parents loue to them their loue to their parents is but cold Wherfore as the heat of the Sun shining much and long on a stone wall draweth a reflection of heat from that wall so the hot beames of parents loue which with feruency and constancy is cast on children ought to prouoke and stirre vp children to send forth a reflection of loue on their parents Two extreames are contrary to this affection of loue One is want of naturall affection which is a vice most odious and abominable in all but most of all in children The Apostle reckoneth this among the most heighnous vices that be The other is hatred and despight of parents a vice more then monstrous and vnnaturall From thence commeth mocking and cursing of parents whereof we shall afterwards heare §. 3. Of a childes feare of his parent To the forenamed dutie of loue must feare be added which is a childes awfull respect of his parent This awfull respect ariseth from an honourable esteeme which a childe in his iudgement and opinion hath of his parent as he is his parent and from it proceedeth on the one side a desire and indeauour in all things to please the parent and on the other side a loathnesse to offend him In this respect the feare of a childe is opposed to the feare of a slaue For a childes feare being mixed with loue hath respect to the offence which a parent may take but a slaues feare which is ordinarily mixed with hatred hath respect to nothing but the punishment which his master may inflict vpon him The forenamed feare is so proper to children as that awfull respect which the Saints beare to God is called a siliall or child-like feare This feare in a childe is an especiall branch of that honour which the law requireth of children to their parents and it is in expresse termes inioyned to children by the law That phrase which God vseth of Miriam If her father had but spit in her face should she not be ashamed seuen daies sheweth that there ought to be such a feare of the parent in a childes heart as should worke shame in it when the parent is offended A worthy patterne we haue hereof in Iaakob who was loath to gaine the blessing with offence of his father This feare keepeth loue in compasse and restraineth a childe from ouermuch saucinesse and malipartnesse And it is a cause of a childes reuerend and dutifull carriage to his parent For as the heart is affected the carriage will be ordered Contrary hereunto is that light or which is more abomiâ—nable that base and vile esteeme of parents which is in the heart of many children especially if parents be poore of low degree vnlearned ignorant or subiect to any infirmities It cannot be but that Cham had too light if not a base esteeme of his father when he derided him A true filiall feare would haue restrained him from that extreme Wherefore to breed and cherish this feare and to preuent â—r redresse the contrary extreme let children well informe themselues of their parents place and authoritie how they are in Gods stead and a meanes vnder God of their childrens being children haue receiued their very substance from the subâ—tance of their parents In which respect though they should â—eeme contemptible to others yet not to their children Thus much of a childes inward disposition towards his parent The manifestation thereof must be by his outward carriage and that in two things Reuerence and Obedience both which respect a parents authoritie §. 4. Of a childes Reuerence in refraining speech before his parent and in hearkening to his parent The outward reuerence which children owe to their paâ—â—nts consisteth partly in their speech partly in their carriage Their speech both to and of their parents must sauour reuerence To their parents in presence OF their parents in absence In presence by refraining their speech well framing   For refraining speech two vertues are requisite Silence Patience  Silence in forbearing to speake breaking of speech  Patience in hearkening to their parents The two branches of silence in forbearing to speake espeâ—â—â—lly when parents are speaking or till parents giue leaue to their children to speake and in breaking off speech when parents come into the place where children are speaking are tokens of great reuerence Thus children testifie that there are some in place whom they much respect and honour Iob doth thus set forth the respect which Princes and others did beare to him in his prosperitie The Princes saith he refrained talking and laid their hand vpon their mouth the Nobles held their peace c. Namely while he was in presence or while he spake The like may be said of childrens patience in induring their parents speech which Iob also noteth in these words Vnto me men gaue eare and waited and kept silence Though parents in their speech seeme to be long and tedious yet must children indure it And it is very needfull that patience be added to silence because many parents in tender loue of their children and earnest desire of their good thinke they can neuer speake enough in instructing and admonishing them The many exhortations giuen in Scripture vnto children to heare hearken giue eare giue heed marke and obserue the words of their parents doe imply the forenamed silence and patience for they who ought to be swift to heare must be slow to speake I denie not but much more is intended vnder those phrases namely obedience yet must these also be presupposed for he that will not in silence patiently hearken to his parents while they speake will much lesse obey what they say
heare them and that the rather to maintaine a reuerend respect of parents in the heart of their children For asking a blessing is an acknowledgement of superiority and authority according to that of the Apostle The lesse is blessed of the greater Concerning the gesture of kneeling it is answerable to the gesture which of old was vsed by Gods people in like case of Ioseph it is said that he bowed downe himselfe with his face to the earth Obiect Kneeling is a gesture proper to Gods worship Answ It is not so proper but that it may be vsed in ciuill cases else Christ would haue reproued the young man for kneeling before him as well as for calling him good for he conceiued Christ to be but a meere man and the worship he did him was but ciuill It is not simply the gesture but the occasion of the gesture the minde of him that performeth it and the end why he performeth it that maketh it diuine or ciuill Cornelius fell down before Peter with conceit of some diuine excellency in him and was not allowed his manner of worshiping was diuine The iaylor fell downe before Paul and Silas in acknowledgement of some outward eminency in them and was not reproued his manner of worshipping was meerely ciuill The same gesture may be performed to different persons with a different respect A childe may kneele to his parent and to the king Yet it followeth not that he maketh his parent a king Neither will it follow that by kneeling to his parent he maketh him a God because men kneele to God §. 10. Of the vices contrary to childrens reuerend gesture towards their parents Contrary to the forenamed branches of reuerend gesture are 1. Rudenesse and vnmannerlinesse when children know not how to put difference betwixt their parents and strangers but can suffer their parents to come to them and they abide in their place and not stirre to meet them 2. Disdainfull statelinesse when they thinke much to stand bare-headed any while in their parents presence It falleth out many times that when parents and children are together before their betters they will shew more reuerence then these for the father will stand and be vncouered when the sonne sitteth downe and puts on his hat vpon conceit that his father doth more reuerence then is meet but if it were so yet the sonne for the fathers sake should stoope somewhat the lower 3. Wantonnesse and boldnesse when children are ouer-familiar with their parents toying and gigling vpon euery light occasion This kinde of cariage cannot but much tend to the disgrace and dishonour of parents For what can they who behold it thinke but that such children haue beene too much cockered and ill nurtered 4. Ambition when children are so ambitiously desirous of place especially in companie as rather then be vnder some whom they suppose to be at least their equals they will be aboue their parents This oft falleth out when parents being of a lowly minde giue place to such as their children being of a lofty minde thinke meaner then themselues Now rather then they will be vnder their inferiours as they suppose they will be aboue their parents A point of great insolencie Such ought to be the respect of a childe to his parent as he should debase himselfe below those that are his inferiours rather then exalt himselfe aboue his parent As with other men for peace sake in many cases a man must depart from his right so especially with his parent in case of superioritie Would not euery one that knowes what honour a childe owes to a father condemne that childs ambition that should so stand vpon the place and hand as to take them of his parent 5. An ouer-nice and erroneous opinion of those who thinke it vnmeet for any childe to aske their parents blessing Their owne conceit more swayeth them then the continuali approued practise of Gods people in all ages not vnlike him whom Solomon saith to be wiser in his owne conceit then seuen men that can render a reason Others though they doe not so generally disaâ—ow this dutie yet they thinke it meet only for yong children not considering of what yeeres stature and state Ioseph was when he performed it As for those who thinke it not vnlawfull yet carelesly neglect it they little consider the benefit of a parents blessing Profane Esau shall another day rise vp in iudgement against them He beggd and beggd againe and againe and that with a loud cry and salt teares a blessing of his father Thus much of childrens reuerence Their obedience followeth §. 11. Of childrens obedience The obedience of children doth most proue the authoritie of parents and is the surest euidence of the honour a childe giueth to his parent therefore is it by name in the text expressed and all other duties are comprised vnder it Reuerence without obedience is a meere mockage nothing at all acceptable Of the two a childe were better faile in the former instance the parable of the two sonnes Reuerence in comparison of obedience is but a complementall honour Obedience is a true reall honour the surest triall of a dutifull childe Obedience is a dutie so proper to children as the Apostle applieth it to them as a proper attribute saying as obedient children fashion not c. The example of Christ is herein set before vs as a patterne he was subiect to his parents Solomon counteth the neglect thereof a despising of a parent Contrary is disobedience and rebellion the greatest impeachment of parents authoritie that can be For to what end is authoritie ouer those who resist it and rebell against it The Apostle reckoneth disobedient children among the lewdest persons that be and setteth forth their disobedience by a metaphor taken from vntamed head-strong beasts that will not be brought vnder the yoke the word therefore is not vnfitly translated vnruly and it is somewhat answerable to an Hebrew phrase giuen to disobedient children viz. sonnes of Belial which is according to the notation as much as sonnes without profit or as some will haue â—it sonnes without yoke that is such children as refusing to be in subiection vnto parents are no way profitable but worke much mischiefe and cause great griefe The punishment which by Gods law was appointed to disobedient and rebellious children was a publike shamefull death §. 12. Of childrens forbearing to doe things without consent of parents That children may the better know their dutie in this respect I will distinctly set forth both the parts and also the extent of a childs obedience 1. Wherein it consisteth 2. How farre it extendeth The generall parts wherein it consisteth are two 1. A forbearance from doing things without consent of parents 2. A performance of such things as parents will haue done The former of these is a dutie whereunto children are must bound while
the aduice to the Queene 1. It is mystically to be taken 2. If it should be literally taken it is to be taken as giuen to her after mariage when she was out of her parents gouernment 3. It hath relation to the law of mariage â—nd implieth not a simple forsaking of parents but a preferring of a husband before them 4. For the louing of father and mother more then Christ 〈◊〉 It doth not necessarily imply a forsaking of our parents â—or we may loue Christ more then them and yet performe â—uty to them 2. If they be forsaken it must be in opposition to Christ that either Christ or they must be forsaken in that if we cleaue to them they will draw vs from Christ 5. For Christs forbidding one that followed him to goe and burie his father 1. It was because of an extraordinary calling which he had 2. It is set downe as a patterne to Ministers to shew that they should especially attend vpon their proper function and leaue other secular matters to be performed by such as can performe them well enough To apply it to childrens forsaking of parents is to peruert the sense of it Thus we see to how little purpose the forenamed arguments are alledged to proue that erronious opinion of childrens entring into religious orders without their parents consent I might further shew how irreligious their pretended religious orders be and so shew how vnlawfull it is to enter into them euen with consent of parents but that maketh nothing to the point in hand §. 15. Of the vnlawfulnesse of childrens trauelling and binding themselues prentises without consent of parents Contrary also to the forenamed part of childrens obedience is the practise of such children as trauell and seeke their fortunes as they speake without consent of parents like the Prodigall childe if not worse for it is likely that he forced from his father a generall consent in that he obtained of him his portion of goods These vsually bring great griefe to their parents and many times make them feare more then is cause as old Iaakob feared when he knew not what was become of his sonne Among those aberrations may be reckoned a custome in this land more vsuall then lawfull for children to binde themselues prentises without consent of parents to which fault they who take indentures of such children or otherwise couenant with them without knowledge of their parents consent make themselues accessary §. 16. Of parents consent to the mariage of their children II. That children ought to haue their parents consent vnto their mariage is without all question euident For 1. God himselfe hath giuen vs herein a patterne He first brought the woman to the man Gen. 2. 22. whereby he would shew that he who gaue a being to the woman had a right to dispose her in mariage which right parents now haue for from them vnder God children receiue their being In this case parents stand in Gods roome and are as it were Gods hand to ioyne their children in mariage 2. God hath giuen expresse lawes concerning this point To omit that generall morall law Honour thy father and thy mother which as it is the ground of all other duties appertaining to children so of this also the authoritie and charge which God by his law Deut. 7. 3 hath laid vpon parents to giue their daughters to husbands and to take wiues for their sonnes hath the force of a law to binde children from taking wiues or husbands without or against their parents consent This law was not proper to the Iewes only but as a branch of the morall law it is pressed vpon Christians 1 Cor. 7. 36. 37. To this may be added the iudiciall law if it be to be accounted meerely iudiciall of a parents power in giuing his daughter or refusing to giue her in mariage to him that had defloured her Exo. 22. 17. 3. Answerable to the law hath beene the practise of Gods Saints recorded and approued in Scripture Isaak married the wife which his father prouided Gen. 24. 67. Iaakob both obeyed his father in going to Labans house for a wife Gen. 28. 2. and also when he came to Laban asked his daughter of him Gen. 29. 18. c. Though Sampson saw a daughter of the Philistims which pleased him well yet would he not marry her before he had his parents consent Iudg. 14. 2. 4. These words of Thamar 2 Sam. 13. 13. Speake vnto the King who was her father for he will not with-hold thee from me shew that children were not wont to be married without consent of parents Which is further confirmed by this oath of the Israelites There shall not any of vs giue his daughter vnto Beniamin to wife Iudg. 21. 1. 5. The ancient fathers of the Church haue in their ages taught children this duty and pronounced mariages of children without consent of parents to be vnlawfull 6. The very heathen haue obserued the equity hereof Though Shechem loued Dinah and had defloured her yet would he not mary her without the consent of his and her father Gen. 34 3. c. Ismael had learned as much either by the instruction he had receiued out of Abrahams house or else by the light of nature for he stood to the choice which his mother made for him Gen. 21. 21. 7. Though Papists in other cases make the authority of parents to be of no effect yet in this case they count it vtterly vnlawfull for children to marry without or against their parents consent and haue thereupon made Canons against it 8. The law of nature and nations the ciuill and canon law the common and statute law of our Land all manner of law is agreeable to Gods law in this point 9. It hath beene a custome in all Christian Churches throughout all ages for the parent or some in the parents roome to giue the Bride to the Bridegroome at the time of the mariage whereby the parents consent is openly manifested 10. Many Diuines of good note and name haue iudged such marriages as haue beene made simply without or directly against parents consent especially if parents haue iust cause of exception against those mariages to be of no force till the parent be brought to ratifie them and in many Churches vpon due examination of the matter they vse to account them as no mariages Experience hath manifested the boldnesse of many children in setting light by their parents consent in those places where mariages once consummated are ratified and made indissoluble though they haue beene made simply without or directly against parents consent Many children thinke though it be vnlawfully done yet being done it shall stand Whereupon if they doubt of their parents consent they will cast how to get their mariage consummate so as their parents may not know of it to hinder it before it is done and after it is done impudently resolue to beare out as
to bring their parents vnder them to be ordered by them labouring to get possession of all before their parents be dead or before they be willing to resigne any such right vnto their children Such were Absolom and Adoniah How highly displeasing such practises are to God the vengeance which fell vpon the pates of those two Brethren in euill traiterous and disloyall children doth shew All such children as seeke after the forenamed or any other like meanes to defraud their parents doe very ill repay their parents care ouer them and more like Barbarians then Christians recompence euill for good they oft bring pouerty and ignominy vpon their parents and themselues they are worse then other theeues because they are more deerely accounted of and more freely trusted yea they are a very bad example to seruants in the house or subiects in the commonwealth §. 25. Of childrens contentednesse to be apparelled after their parents minde and liking IIII. A fourth branch of the foresaid subiection of children is about their apparell that it be no other then may stand with their parents good liking It is noted that Israel made Ioseph a coat doth not the particular mentioning of that circumstance shew that parents must haue the ordering of their childrens apparell Which is also intimated in the reason giuen of Tamars garment of diuers colours namely because with such garments were the kings daughters that were virgins apparelled And whereas Rebekah had the keeping of her sonne Esaus clothes it appeareth that his clothes were to the minde of his parents else he would haue hid them from them for further confirmation whereof it is noted that his apparell was pleasing to his father Contrary is the vaine-glorious humour of many children who to the griefe and discredit of their parents apparell themselues both against the minde and also aboue the ability and vnbeseeming the place and calling of their parents Among others many ministers children bring much discredit on their parents hereby Let all such proud Youths note how the Lord hath threatned to visit euen Kings children that are clothed with strange apparell §. 26. Of childrens forbearing to binde themselues to doe any thing against their parents consent V. The fift and last branch wherewith I will exemplifie the forenamed subiection of children shall be that which is expresly noted in the law namely a childes binding of it selfe by a vow The law giueth the parent power to disanull his childes vow It is therefore a childes dutie to abstaine from vowing without his parents consent Contrary are such vowes as Papists allure children to make namely vowes of continencie perpetuall virginitie regular obedience voluntarie pouertie with the like Though by these they be not drawne to forsake their parents which before we proued to be vtterly vnlawfull and though these in their nature were lawfull which they are not because they are against Gods law and ordinance and against Christian libertie and sauour too rankly of Iudaisme yea of a worse superstition yet without parents consent might they not be made As vnlawfull are oaths and other like meanes whereby children binde themselues to the performance of such indifferent things as their parents are not willing they should doe What doth this but bring a snare vpon the consciences of children and cause a necessitie of breaking one of Gods commandements either the third in breaking their vow or oath or the fift in disobeying their parents §. 27. Of childrens actiue obedience The affirmatiue and actiue part of a childs obedience consists in yeelding himselfe pliable to his parents will which must be added to the forenamed negatiue and passiue part of obedience in forbearing to doe things without consent of parents for manifestation of a true child-like affection and disposition toward the parent Passiue obedience may arise from meere fullennesse and stoutnesse of stomach For there are many who will forbeare to doe this or that without consent of parents because they are loth to aske their consent they had rather haue their owne wills crost in the things they desire then be made subiect to their parents will What doth this argue but a stout stomach and a disdainfull heart Besides to forbeare the doing of an vnlawfull thing is but to abstaine from euill But it is required of Christians to doe that which is good as well as to abstaine from that which is euill This is it which is commended in Iaakob he did not only forbeare to take such a wife as would be a griefe to his parents wherein his brother Esau had offended but also obeyed his parents in taking such a wife as they willed him to take This generall point we will exemplifie in foure particular instances namely in a childs obedience to his parents commandements instructions reproofes corrections §. 28. Of childrens obedience to their parents commandements I. What lawfull commandements soeuer parents giue to their children they must be ready to the vttermost of their power to obey Obey your parents saith the Apostle to children Parents by vertue of their place haue power and authoritie to command Children therefore must obey or else that power is to no purpose To demonstrate this by some particulars 1. If a parent call his childe or send for him he must readily come yea though he know not the occasion Eli was in place of a parent to Samuel whereupon the childe supposing that Eli called him ranne to him once and againe and againe Dauid when he was sent for by his father out of the field to be anointed King knew not the occasion yet came The twelue sonnes of Iaakob though men growne yet called for by their father assembled themselues together before him 2. If a parent be disposed to send his childe any whither or of any errand though it be farre off and may seeme somewhat troublesome yet he ought to goe and doe it The forenamed example of Iaakob the example also of Ioseph being sent to see whether it were well with his brethren and of the tenne sonnes of Iaakob being sent by their father into Egypt and of Dauid sent to visit his brethren in the hoste are in this case commended by the holy Ghost Of Dauid it is noted that he arose vp early and went as Ishai had commanded him which setteth forth his ready obedience 3. If a parent require his childe to attend vpon him he must also doe that When Abram was going vp to the top of Moriah his will was that his seruants should tarrie behinde and that his sonne Isaak should attend him and carry the wood for the sacrifice and accordingly Isaak obeyed 4. If a parent inioyne any taske or commit any businesse to his childe he ought faithfully to performe it This kinde of faithfull obedience is commended in Ioseph in the Rechabites and in Dauid with many others Ioseph by
reproofe that patience can be no better accounted of then dissimulation and plaine mockage When the father in law of Moses told him that what he did was not well he forthwith amended it But contrarily many lewd and vngracious children continue to goe on in their wicked courses though their parents againe and againe rebuke them for it Iust was Elies reproofe of his children but yet no amendment followed Now note the inference made thereupon by the holy Ghost They obeyed not the voice of their father because the Lord would slay them whereby is implied that to despise the iust reproofe of parents is an euident signe and forerunner of Gods heauy iudgement Salomon calls the childe which will heare no rebuke a Scorner which noteth out a most obstinate sinner that cannot be reclaimed and in that respect is scorned of the Lord. §. 33. Of Childrens submission to their parents correction IIII. Correction is a reall reproofe a reproofe in the highest degree euen the seuerest kinde of reproofe so as by subiection hereunto great tryall of obedience is made By the same meanes must a childes submission to his parent in this kinde of reproofe be manifested as in the former namely 1. By bearing patiently the correction which his parent shall giue him 2. By amending readily that for which he is iustly corrected The former of these is noted by the Apostle as a ruled case a matter not to be denied in these words We haue had fathers of our flesh which corrected vs and we gaue them reuerence One speciall part of this reuerence is a patient suffering therefore he inferres thereupon ought we not to be in subiection c. The latter is set forth by Salomon vnder an effect which followeth vpon the performance thereof for hauing aduised a parent to correct his childe he addeth this reason He shall giue thee rest yea he shall giue delight vnto thy soule how can this rest and delight be giuen but by the childes amendment of that for which he is corrected A parent taketh no delight in the paine and smart of his childe but in the fruit that followeth thereupon As a childes transgression is a griefe and vexation to the parent so his amendment causeth rest and delight Now this effect followeth not simply vpon correction but vpon the good vse thereof which is made by the childe It lyeth therefore in the childe and so lyeth vpon him as a dutie to giue this rest and delight to his parent by amending the fault for which he is corrected as he brought griefe to him by prouoking him to vse correction Thus shall neither parent repent the inflicting nor the childe repent the induring of correction That a childe may attaine to this degree of obedience he must duly consider both the Cause whereby his parent is moued to correct him and also the End which he aimeth at therein The cause is the loue he beareth to his childe The end which he aimeth at is his childes good If these motiues worke not obedience what can §. 34. Of refusing or abusing correction Contrary is disdaine on the one side and obstinacie on the other Disdaine when children scorne to be corrected by their parents and in that respect when by all the meanes they can vse they cannot auoid it they will mutter and murmure fret and fume rage and raue against their parents and despise and hate them for it Obstinacie when they will be no whit bettered thereby but still runne on in their leaud courses and rather waxe the worse for being corrected This may be counted the highest pitch of a childes rebellion for this is the last meanes which a parent can vse to reclaime his childe from desperate courses If this preuaileth not the law of God requireth that a parent should giue vp his childe into the hand of the Magistrate that he may be put to death Hitherto of the distinct branches of childrens Obedience The Extent thereof followeth §. 35. Of childrens conforming their iudgements to their parents The extent of childrens obedience is only implied in this Epistle to the Ephesians but it is expressed Col. 3. 20 in these words Children obey your parents IN ALL THINGS A large extent but not simply to be taken without any limitation for the Apostle himselfe noteth a restraint in these words In the Lord. So farre forth as children transgresse not any of Gods commandements in obeying their parents they ought to obey This is to obey in all things in the Lord. The extent of childrens duties being the very same that was of wiues duties and the restraint also the same that order which was there obserued shall here also be kept Only other proofes more pertinent to childrens place shall be brought to confirme those generall propositions which may be applied to any inferiours Many generall reasons there alledged for proofe of the propositions shall here be omitted Wherefore compare this place with that Thus we see that parents authority is very large there is no restraint of it but Gods contrary command whereof a childe must be assured if he refuse to obey his parent in any thing It is not enough for a childe to say I haue thus long and in thus many things obeyed my parent I hope in some things if I haue mine owne will I may be excused No All things comprise more then many things Wherefore Many are not enough And though Gods will be exempted yet is not thine owne will exempted though thou maiest doe nothing against Gods will yet thou oughtest to doe many things against thine owne will if it be contrary to thy parents Two things are to be laboured after by children for attaining to this extent of obedience in all things 1. They must labour to bring their iudgement and will to the bent of their parents to thinke that meet and conuenient for them to doe which their parents will haue them doe Though Isaak thought it somewhat strange that he should carry wood vp to an hill to offer sacrifice where was nothing for a burnt offering yet it being the will of his father that he should doe so he thought it meet enough for him to doe so This subiection of iudgement and will is to be yeelded in all the particular cases of obedience which were before propounded as in their calling mariage apparrell allowance c. So as children are to thinke that kinde of calling that particular match that apparrell and that allowance to be meetest for them which their parents thinke meete If the iudgement be perswaded of the meetnesse of a thing and the will inwardly brought to yeeld vnto it outward obedience will more readily and cheerefully bee yeelded thereunto Contrary is the ouerweining conceipt which many children haue of their owne iudgement and will who thinke they can better discerne what is fit and meete for themselues then their parents They imagine their parents
to be too strict and precise or too suspicious and iealous or too couetous and worldly This maketh them take what callings what matches what apparrell what allowance they thinke best whence many mischiefes arise which would all easily be auoided if they would lay downe that presumptuous conceit and labour to obserue the forenamed direction §. 36. Of childrens yeelding to practise at their parents command such things as in their iudgements they cannot thinke very meet 2. Though children cannot in their iudgements thinke that which their parents require to be the fittest and meetest yet being pressed thereto by the peremptory command of their parents in practise they ought to yeeld vnto it saying to their parents as Peter to the Lord Neuerthelesse at thy word I will doe this Thus did Iaakob yeeld to Rebekah he thought by doing that which his mother bid him he should seeme a â—â—ocker to his father yet she vrging him he did it Quest May not a childe yeelding better reason then his parent refuse to doe what he thinketh vnmeet or at least forâ—eare to doe what he is commanded till he be better informed â—f the meetnesse thereof Answ With reuerence and humility he may render his reason why he thinketh it not meete and desire his parent not to vrge it vpon him This did Iudah one of the sonnes of Iaakob and is not blamed for it and parents ought in such a case to yeeld to their children as Iaakob did But yet if in things indifferent parents be otherwise minded then their children and will haue their children yeeld to them they must yeeld For 1. In in different things the command of a parent is a warrant to the childe by reason of this extent all things so as the parent may sinne in commanding that in doing whereof the childe may not sinne Who can cleare Rebeckah of sinne in commanding Iaakob to deceiue his father yet I take it that Iaakob cannot iustly be blamed for obeying 2. Children doe thus manifest an high esteeme of their parents and very great respect towards them they shew how desirous they are to please them and how fearefull to offend them When the will of parent and childe consent there is no such triall 3. By this meanes peace and loue is better preserued betwixt parent and childe a parents anger is stopped the effects thereof auoided and many other mischiefes preuented which oft fall out when inferiours refuse to yeeld to their superiours who haue authority ouer them Contrary is their preposterous peremptorines who will doe nothing against their own mind will though their parents require it neuer so much This phrase If thou wilt not send we will not goe downe which Iudah vsed to his father though in a good cause was too peremptory for a childe They who obstinately refuse to doe those things which are against their owne minde must needs come short of this extent Obey in all things Yea they shew that what they doe is rather for their owne sakes because they like it then for their parents sake What obedience then may that be thought to be Yet this is all the obedience which many children will yeeld If they thinke not that which their parents require to be meet nor faire nor foule meanes shall moue them to doe it whereby many children doe much prouoke their parents Let such children know that it is euery way more safe for them at the instant command of their parent to doe that which they conceiue to be vnmeet then peremptorily to disobey their parents which is more then vnmeet euen vnlawfull §. 37. Of the restraint of childrens obedience The restraint of childrens obedience is expressed in this clause in the Lord which phrase affordeth a necessary limitation in obeying their parents who are but parents of our flesh men and women subiect to erre in their commandements and to require such sinfull things as their children may not with a good conscience performe The limitation then which the forenamed clause in the Lord affordeth is this Children must performe no other obedience to their parents then may stand with their obedience to God The reasons rendred by the Apostle proue as much This is right this is well pleasing to the Lord. But to obey parents against the Lord is neither right nor wellpleasing to the Lord. If therefore parents command their children to doe any thing which the Lord hath forbidden them they ought not to doe it On this ground did Michal well in suffering her husband Dauid to escape out of the handes of Saul her father I iustifie not her manner of carying the matter with vntruths and false tales but her refusing to yeeld to her fathers minde and will is iustifiable and that in two respects 1. In that the difference was betwixt her husband and father Now by Gods law a wife is to yeeld to her husband rather then to her father 2. Because she knew her father sought to slay him if then she had deliuered him into the hands of her father she had made her selfe accessary to murder In this latter respect Ioâ—â—athan also did well in refusing to fetch Dauid at his fathers command Thus if a father command his childe to goe to Masse to forsweare himselfe to marry an Idolater to steale to lie or to commit any other sinne forbidden by God the childe ought not to obey those things cannot be done in the Lord. Againe if parents forbid their children the doing of any necessary duty commanded of God the childe ought to doe it notwithstanding the parents inhibition We may well thinke that Ahaz who set himselfe so violently to deface the holy things of God to prophane his ordinances and to shut vp the doores of Gods House gaue strait charge to his sonne that he should not repaire them againe yet Hezekiah so soone as he had power did repaire all If a parent forbid his childe to goe to the Protestants Churches to heare a Sermon to pray in a knowne tongue to giue iust weight and measure to speake the truth when he is called to witnesse it with the like he must be of Daniels minde and notwithstanding that prohibition doe the things which God requireth §. 38. Of childrens sinne in yeelding to their parents against God Contrary to this limitation is on the one side a flattering eie-seruice in many children who care not what they doe be it good or euill lawfull or vnlawfull so they may please their parents thereby and on the other side a slauish fearefulnesse which maketh them so to dread their parents as they feare not God at all they will rather choose to sinne and so prouoke Gods wrath then doe any thing whereby their parents wrath may be prouoked It is a brand set vpon euill kings that they walked in the waies of their fathers and mothers and did wickedly as they counselled them Wherefore the following and obeying of
their parents in euill was so farre from extenuating their sinne as it did rather aggrauate the same The preferring of father and mother before the Lord Christ sheweth that such a childe is not worthy of Christ In comparison of Christ Father and mother must be hated But that vndue and vnchristian-like respect of parents aboue Christ is it that maketh so many young Papists young swagerers swearers liars deceitfull persons and lewd liuers For auoiding the two forenamed extremes let thine heart be filled with a true feare of God and withall consider the difference betwixt our earthly parents and our heauenly Father They are but parents of our flesh he is the Father of spirits They can but touch the body he can cast body and soule into hell They are but a while ouer vs he for euer Their authority is subordinate to his his supreme absolute of it selfe They can giue but a light temporary reward he an eternall weight of glorie They cannot shelter vs from his wrath he can from theirs Hitherto of such duties of children as respect their parents authority such as respect their necessity follow §. 39. Of childrens Recompence The generall head whereunto al the duties which children owe to their parents in regard of their Necessity is in one word Recompence which is a dutie whereby children indeauour as much as in them lieth to repay what they can for their parents kindnesse care and cost towards them and that in way of thankfulnesse which maketh a childe thinke he cannot doe too much for his parent well may he thinke so for a parent doth much more for his childe before it is able to doe for it selfe then the childe possibly can doe for the parent So as if the parents authority were laid aside yet the law of equity requireth this dutie of Recompence so also doth the law of piety and charity Wherefore of all other Duties this is most due It is in expresse termes giuen in charge to children by the Apostle who willeth them to learne to requite their parents Contrary is neglect of parents in their need which is more then monstrous ingratitude As all ingratitude is odious to God and man so this most of all and yet very many are guilty thereof In them the prouerbe is verified that loue is weighty For it is the property of weighty things to fall downe apace out to ascend slowly and that not without some violence Thus loue from the parent to the childe falleth downe apace â—ut it hardly ascendeth from children to parents In which respect another prouerbe saith One father will better nourish nine children then nine children one father Many children in his kinde doe no more for their parents then for strangers They either consider not how much their parents haue done for them or else they conceit that what their parents did was of meere dutie and needeth no recompence Fie vpon such barbarous and inhumane children §. 40. Of infirmities whereunto parents are subiect The rule of the forenamed recompence is on the one side the parents Necessity and on the other the childes Ability So as in euery thing wherein a parent needeth his childes helpe the childe to his power must afford his best helpe Beyond ones power nothing can be expected A parents Necessity may be through Naturall infirmities Casuall extremities  Naturall infirmities are Inward Outward  Inward Infirmities are weakenesse of iudgement slipperinesse of memory violence of passion with the like whence proceed frowardnesse testinesse suspiciousnesse iealousie feare griefe c. Outward Infirmities are such as arise from some instant temptation as were Noahs and Lots drunkennesse Lots and Dauids vncleanesse Abrahams and Isaakes dissimulation Iaakobs and Dauids excessiue lamentation c. Some of these latter which may seeme most heinous and odious sinnes are then to be accounted infirmities when they who commit them make not a sport of them nor delight to liue and lie in them as swine to wallow and lie in the mire but only at some times through some temptation as it were vnawares fall into them and after they are committed they are themselues more ashamed of them and more grieued for them then any other that see them or heare of them In regard of the naturall infirmities of parents the dutie of children is both to beare with them and also to couer them so farre as they can §. 41. Of childrens bearing with their parents infirmities Children beare with their parents infirmities when they doe not the lesse reuerendly esteeme their place or person nor performe the lesse dutie to them because of their infirmities This is the first particular branch of recompence For children in their yonger and weaker yeares are subiect to many infirmities if parents had the lesse respected them for their infirmities and from thence had taken occasion to neglect them and would not haue borne with them surely they could not haue beene so well brought vp That great patience long-sufferance and much forbearance which parents haue shewed towards their children requireth that children in way of recompence shew the like to their parents as occasion is offered It was a great infirmity in Isaak to preferre Esau a prophane childe before Iaakob a religious childe especially against Gods expresse word concerning Iaakob yet Iaakob respected not his father a whit the lesse for it as appeares by his feare to offend him and by his readinesse to obey him Iaakobs vniust reproofe of Ioseph was no small infirmity and yet how much Ioseph reuerenced and euery way respected his father the history following sheweth Sauls infirmities were farre more and much greater then any of theirs yet what dutie and faithfulnesse did Ionathan his sonne performe to him euen to their deaths for he died with him We haue herein the patterne of Christ himselfe how great infirmity did his mother bewray when ouer-rashly she rebuked him being about a good worke a bounden duty his Fathers businesse yet immediatly thereupon it is noted that he went downe with his parents and was subiect to them which manifesteth the honour he gaue to his mother notwithstanding her infirmitie Contrary to this duty doe they who take occasion from their parents infirmities to thinke basely of their person and their place and thereupon grow carelesse in duty either refusing to doe any duty at all or else doing it carelesly grudgingly disdainefully and scornefully Absolom made a supposed infirmity of his father the ground of his rebellion Had his pretence beene true yet had it not beene a sufficient cause for him to disgrace and rise against his father as he did The law that threatneth Gods vengeance against such children as mocke at their father or despise to obey their mother maketh no exception of parents infirmities §. 42. Of childrens couering their parents infirmities Children couer their parents infirmities both by
passing by them as we speake and taking no notice of them and also by concealing them from others as much as they can The Scripture noteth it to be a property of loue to couer a multitude of sinnes now in whom should loue abound if not in children And who should more manifest this property of loue then children Of passing by and concealing from others a parents infirmity we haue a worthy patterne in Shem and Iaphet when Noah their father being drunken lay vncouered in the midst of his tent they went backward that they might not themselues see their fathers infirmity and couered his nakednesse that others might not see it The blessing which vpon this occasion was then promised to them and their posterity sheweth how acceptable this dutie was to God Contrary was Chams practise who discouered and made knowne his fathers nakednesse The curse thereupon denounced against him sheweth how odious that sinne was vnto God Too many there be of Chams cursed brood who blaze abroad their parents infirmities and make such things knowne of them as otherwise would not be knowne whereby they bring much dishonour and shame vpon their parents which can be no honour to the children and withall a curse from their parents on themselues which the heathen accounted very dreadfull More contrary was Absoloms practise who raised a most malicious slander of his father and thereby alienated his subiects hearts from him Too many Absolom-like seeke to raise a supposed reputation and honour to themselues by vilifying and disgracing their parents but let them note Absoloms end Assuredly if they hold on in that course the like or a worse shall be their end §. 43. Of childrens bearing with their parents casuall necessities Casuall extremities are all manner of crosses which by the prouidence of God are laid vpon a man whether vpon his bodie as blindnesse lamenesse sicknesse c. or on his person as captiuitie banishment imprisonment c. or on his estate as pouerrie penurie c. In all these children must beare with their parents as in the forenamed infirmities neither lesse reuerendly esteeme of them nor performe the lesse dutie because of them These are such necessities as are not sinfull in themselues and therefore in regard of these parents are much more to be borne withall Though Isaak were blinde yet did not Iaakob a whit the lesse respect him Though Naomi were poore yet Ruth her daughter in law continued to doe a childs dutie and seruice vnto her Contrary is the vnnaturall disposition of such children as take occasion from these casuall necessities of their parents to despise them God hath made an expresse law against despising those who are by any outward defects impotent as deafe blinde c. If no person may despise another for these much lesse children their parents They are worse then Cham that doe so and may looke for an heauier curse §. 44. Of childrens releeuing their parents according to their neede Besides bearing with parents necessities in such cases as parents stand in need of their childrens releefe and succour they must afford it them In sicknesse they must visit them as Ioseph visited his father In time of mourning they must comfort them as the children of Iaakob In want they must prouide things needfull for them as the sonnes of Iaakob who went vp to buy food for their father and as Ioseph who sent for Iaakob into Egypt and there nourished him It is noted of Ruth that shee did not only gleane for her mother a poore woman but also reserued some of that food which was giuen to her selfe to eat for her In time of danger they must doe what they can for their protection and preseruation as Dauid had in this respect an especiall care of his father and mother Yea if God be pleased to take children out of this world before their parents and their parents be succourlesse they must take what order they can for the well-being of their parents after their owne departure as Christ who commended his mother to his disciple Iohn a little before his death These and such like duties are particular branches of recompence and are all comprised vnder that requitall which the Apostle requireth of children And they are but a small part of requitall of all the paines care and charges that parents haue been at with their children Yea this only thing that parents haue brought forth children into the world can children neuer sufficiently requite Nature hath taught thus much not only vnto heathen men but also vnto the vnreasonable creatures Among other vnreasonable creatures the example of the Storke is worthy to be noted for it is recorded of that kinde that when the dammes are old the young ones feed them and when through age they are ready to faint in their flying the young ones will helpe and when they are past flying the young ones carrie them on their backs The Greeke name of a Storke is taken from that word which signifieth to requite a parents kindnesse or else this word is taken from that name they are both of the same notation Contrary is the opinion of Pharisies who thought that children by consecrating their substance to the Temple might be freed from this dutie of recompence to parents which is the mysterie of that Hebrew word Corban They made a meere pretext of piety to God a cause of manifest impietie against parents Christ giueth this verdict of them that they make the word of God of none effect Papists are of the same opinion and so vnder the same censure Contrary also is their practise who hauing the goods of this world suffer their parents to want S. Iohn saith that the loue of God dwelleth not in him who shutteth vp his compassion from his brother in that case how then can it dwell in such a childe Not they only who suffer their parents to starue offend in this extreme but they also who suffer them to liue poorely and basely when themselues Diues-like fare delicately and goe gorgeously attired euery day In an higher degree doe they offend who bring their parents to such extremities as to pouertie by their lauish spending to prison by importuning them to be their sureties to excessiue griefe by their mischieuous practises as the sonnes of Iaakob But what shall we say of such gracelesse children as dare strike their parents Gods law accounteth such a childe vnworthy of life and adiudgeth him to death Nay what may be said of father-quellers and mother-quellers There was of old no particular law made against them because it is supposed that no childe can be so vnnaturall and inhumane In imitation whereof Solon that wise law-maker among the heathen made no law against them and his reason being asked he answered that he thought no childe would commit such a fact When afterwards such
inhumane impietie was manifested in the world the Ciuill Law ordained this punishment If any shall kill his parent let him not be put to the sword nor fire nor any other vsuall punishment but let him be sowed in a sacke with a dog and a cocke and a viper and an ape and cast into the next sea or riuer that while life is in him he may begin to want all vse of the elements and be depriued while he liueth of the aire and when he is dead of the earth This sinne hauing beene committed among the heathen the Apostle reckoneth it vp among other most notorious and barbarous sinnes 1. Tim. 1. 9. As murther is one of those sinnes which the earth can least beare and which cryeth loudest to heauen for vengeance so among the seuerall kinds of murther this is the most vnsupportable and crying Thus much of the duties of children which they are to performe while their parents liue It remaineth to speake of those which they are to performe when their parents are dead §. 45. Of childrens care to burie their parents being dead The duties which children owe to their parents after they are dead concerne the Bodie of their deceased pareÌ„t Credit   It is the dutie of children to bring the bodies of their parents deceased with such decencie and honour as may be answerable to the place and reputation wherein they liued So as both the thing it selfe and the manner of doing it is to be obserued The thing it selfe namely Buriall of the corps of such as are deceased hath euer beene in vse in Gods Church and it hath beene vsed as a meanes to maintaine our hope of the resurrection of our bodies Many of the heathen who neuer dreamt of the resurrection were wont to burne the dead bodies of their friends other heathen learned this manner of buriall from the Church though they knew not the mysterie thereof It is more cleare then needs be proued that Gods people from the beginning of the world haue performed this dutie of buriall to their friends but it is not pertinent to the point in hand to insist vpon the generall that it belongs especially to children to procure this dutie to be performed is now the point to be proued which is readily done by the approued examples of Isaak Iaakob Ioseph and others expresly recorded in Scripture And great reason there is for it for 1. It is a testimonie of great loue and good respect to the partie deceased Now who should manifest more loue and greater respect then a childe 2. It is a kinde of blessing promised by God to his Saints to be buried as on the other side it is a curse threatned against obstinate sinners not to be buried In this respect Dauid blesseth the men of Iabesh Gilead for burying Saul and acknowledgeth it a kindnesse done to Saul Now who ought rather to procure a blessing and doe a kindnesse to parents then children who are oft blessed through their parents meanes 3. It being a great deformity to haue a mans corps lie aboue ground for no carkase will be more loathsome then a mans if it lie vnburied children who are most bound to couer their parents deformity are in this respect bound to burie their corps Contrary is their practise whose mindes are so set on their parents goods as they cleane neglect their bodies So soone as their parents breath is out of their body they so busie themselues about the things which they haue left behinde them as their corps is ready to stinke before care be taken for the buriall of it Yea some will purposely keepe their parents corps aboue ground till they be exceeding noisome for receiuing some reuenues or debts or other accounts which must be paid before the corps be buried If their corps must needes for sometime be kept aboue ground let them be imbalmed or so vsed as they may not sauour They who are carelesse hereof shew that they respect their parents wealth more then his person and honour In which respect they also heinously transgresse who are so greedy of their parents estate as they must needs preuent his departure and like Adoniah enter vpon their fathers estate and take possession of his goods before breath is out of his body whereby they doe oft cause great disquietnesse to him that would depart in peace Againe others bearing an inward grudge and secret hatred against a brother or other kinsman whom their parent intirely loued and in that respect durst not meddle with him in their parents life-time so soone as their parent is dead picke a quarrell with the party hated and so disturbe and hinder their parents funerall Such a plot Esau intended but God defeated it whereby it appeareth that God is displeased therewith §. 46. Of the decency wherewith children ought to see their parents buried The manner after which children ought to see their parents buried must be with such decency as is agreeable to the commendable custome of the countrie and Church where their parents die and with such honour as is in some measure answerable to the estate and place of their parents while they liued at least if it be not aboue the meanes that the parent hath left or aboue the abilitie of the childe that maketh the solemnitie Ioseph was a great Gouernour in Egypt by reason whereof his father when he came thither was highly accounted of accordingly with great honour did he carry him to his graue There are two extremes contrary to the forenamed decency â—nd honour One is an ouerlauish and prodigall sumptuousnesse â—nd solemnitie at their parents funerall farre aboue the estate â—nd farre beyond the meanes which the parent hath left and â—arre also aboue the estate and ability of the childe himselfe â—ome by the needlesse solemnitie of their parents funerall are â—â— farre cast into debt as they are neuer able to recouer themselues againe and so bring more dishonour to their parents by â—he weaknesse of their childes estate then honour by the soâ—â—mnitie of the funerall there may be great honour and much decency in a funerall where is not extraordinary charâ—es instance Steuens funerall The other extreme is too base and priuate a manner of â—urying their parents much vnbeseeming both their parents â—nd their owne estate and means which ariseth from a mixture â—f pride and couetousnesse possessing their hearts Pride maâ—eth them haue no solemnity at all because couerousnesse will not suffer them to exceed in their solemnitie Hence it commeth to passe that they chuse out strange places where neither their parents or selues are knowne and the dead of the night that none may espie them and appoint an vncertaine time that no friend may accompany them God oft meeteth with such proud couetous children in their kinde and causeth them with like dishonour to be brought to their graues §. 47. Of childrens
paying their parents debts after their death As children must haue respect to the body of their parents deceased so also to their credit and name which is a thing of greater account and honour a thing wherein they may bring a kinde of blessing to their parents and make them liue after their death Parents themselues cannot doe any thing when they are dead to preserue the same children therefore being the liuing Image of their parents must indeuour to doe it Three things there be which children must make conscience of euen in regard of their deceased parents credit and reputation one to pay their debts another to suppresse ill rumors a third to imitate their good example I. If the estate of parents their goods or lands come to their children their dutie is to pay their debts so farre as they can especially if by law those debts may be recouered at their hands For what law may force others to doe in equitie and Iustice conscience must moue good children to doe in charitie and recompence to their parents The holy Ghost makes it a note of a wicked man to borrow and not to pay Wherfore to wipe away that blot from the name of a parent deceased children must be ready in this kinde to doe what the parent himselfe if he were liuing would or should doe Yea if children of themselues be well able though their parents left not sufficient to pay all their debts they ought to pay them Herein especially a childlike affection is manifested to the parent Contrary is their practise who striue to get all they can of their parents and yet make no conscience of paying any debts at all vnlesse law force them thereto What they doe in this case cannot be thought to be done for their parents sake but rather for their owne sake Many so little respect their parents credit in this kinde as they priuily conueigh away and vtterly conceale much of their parents estate of purpose to defeate Creditors which as it is a part of apparent iniustice so it is a cause of opening the mouthes of men against their parents to their discredit and shame §. 48. Of childrens suppressing euill reports against their parents deceased * The direction giuen before concerning childrens speech of their parents behinde their backs may fitly be applied also to the care which children ought to haue of the speeches and reports which are made of their parents after their departure It followeth as from the lesse to the greater that what children doe for their parents credit in absence behinde their backes they must much more doe when they are dead for then there is no hope no possibilitie that parents should doe any thing to right their owne wrong in that kinde it lyeth therefore vpon children to doe it Doe not they cleane contrary who take occasion from the departure of their parents both to open their eares to receiue any ill reports of them and also to open their mouthes to speake ill of them then blazing abroad all their infirmities and stretching their ill reports of their parents beyond the lists of truth Ill birds they are that so bewray their owne neast They know that their parents being dead can haue no notice thereof whereby they shew what little piety to God or parent is in their heart But there is an euer-liuing all-seeing and all-knowing Father that taketh notice of all who beside other â—engeance will cause such measure to be meated out to them â—s they mete to their parents There is no one thing wherein this prouerb With what measure you mete it shall be measured â—o you againe is more often verified then in childrens ingraâ—itude to their parents All ages haue giuen many instances thereof The very heathen obserued it Which sheweth Gods great indignation against it §. 49. Of childrens imitating their parents good example If parents haue beene persons of good carriage in their life time as religious towards God iust in their dealings with men mercifull to such as stood in need of their helpe doing much good in their place and so ended their daies with much credit it is an especiall meanes to maintaine and continue this their credit for children to walke in their steps and to indeuour to be like them Thus is a blessed memorie of their parents kept fresh and greene as we speake though their bodies be rotten For when they who knew the parents behold the like good qualities and actions in their children they will thereby be put in minde of the parties deceased and say Oh how such parents yet liue behold a liuely and liuing Image of them Thus did Salomon Asa Iehosaphat Hezekiah Iosiah and such like good Kings which came of the stocke and linage of Dauid keepe the memory of their father Dauid fresh faire and flourishing long after his body was rotten as is euident by these and such like phrases He walked in the ordinances of Dauid his father he walked in all the waies of Dauid his father he did that which was right as Dauid his father c. There can be no better monument of a parents pietie honestie and vertue then a childes liuely representation of the same Wherefore as a motiue to stirre vp children to walke in the good waies of their parents God hath promised to shew mercy to thousands of them that loue him and keepe his commandements that is such as hauing religious and righteous parents walke in their steps Contrary are both those that are vnlike good parents and those that are like euill parents The former sort doe much impeach and dishonour the reputation of their parents as Rehoboam who by his foolish rigorous and vniust carriage made the people speake contemptuously of Dauid The latter sort continue in memorie the euill name and the shame of their parents and cause them to stinke more and more as the sonnes and successors of Ieroboam who following his idolatrous course made it the more remembred and caused this blur to remaine in his stile from age to age Ieroboam which made Israel to sinne As they stop the current and hinder the passage of the blessing of righteous parents so these propagate and open a way for the curse of vnrighteous parents §. 50. Of the superstitious dutie enioyned by Papists to children after their parents decease To the two forenamed duties of burying the corps and preseruing the credit of parents Papists adde a third and Heathen a fourth whereof neither are warrantable by Gods word but directly contrary thereto That which Papists adde is that children after their parents death ought to procure Diriges Masses Pardons Releases and such like toies for them and make continuall prayers to free them out of Purgatory and bring them to rest in heauen of the vanity of these prayers and folly of the other toies I haue elsewhere spoken The Scripture expresly teacheth that after death the soule goeth to the place
appointed for it of endlesse blisse or woe so as there is no meanes of altering the one or helping forward the other §. 51. Of the vnlawfulnesse of childrens seeking to reuenge their parents wrongs That which Heathen adde is that children after their parents death reuenge such wrongs as haue beene done to them in their life time And they presse this so farre vpon children as they affright them with their parents Ghost saying that if they neglect to reuenge their parents wrongs their Ghost will follow them and not suffer them to liue in quiet but molest them continually This conceipt ariseth from the corruption of nature which is exceeding prone to reuenge but it is expresly forbidden in Scripture in these and such prohibitions Resist not euill Recompence to no man euill for euill Auenge not our selues c. Yet some in iustification thereof alledge Daâ—ids charge to Salomon of taking vengeance on Ioab and Sheâ—â—ei after his death Answ The charge which Dauid gaue Salomons execution thereof was no matter of priuate reuenge but only a lawfull execution of iustice which children may and ought to doe Iust reasons there were to moue Dauid to put off the execution of â—ustice vpon the one the other so long Ioab was too mightie to haue execution done on him in Dauids time and Shemeis offence was committed in the time of Dauids humiliation which made him sweare that he would not himselfe take Vengeance of him Besides Salomon executed iustice on the one and the other not for the wrongs they did to his father but for other crimes which they committed in his time onely their former offences were remembred to aggrauate the matter Thus farrc of childrens duties The manner of performing them followeth to be declared §. 52. Of the manner of performing childrens duties That clause which noted out the limitation of childrens duties affoordeth also an excellent direction for the manner of performing them It is this in the Lord that is Children must so performe their duty to their parents as they would or should performe it to the Lord. More particularly it implieth these six points 1. That their duties be performed in conscience or for conscience sake which is all one as for the Lords sake for the Lord onely is Iudge of the conscience and hath power ouer it Thus must subiects performe duty to magistrates much more children to parents The reason which the Apostle rendereth in these words This is wel-pleasing to the Lord sheweth that children in obeying their parents must labour to approue themselues to God 2. Their duties must be in sincerity which is when children pretend in shew to doe no more then in truth and heart they meane Whatsoeuer ye doe doe it heartily as to the Lord saith the Apostle Parents vse to deale with none more heartily then with their children accordingly must children deale with parents 3. They must be performed cheerefully with a willing and ready minde for the Lord loueth cheerefulnesse Herein lyeth a maine difference betwixt a filiall and seruile a childe like and slauelike obedience 4. They must be performed reuerendly as to them which beare the Image of God Hereof we spake before 5. They must so be performed as in performing them no sinne be committed against God Hereof also we spake before 6. Constancy must be added to all other vertues For as the Lord himselfe is constant in all his waies and workes so he expecteth that children should be in the duties which he requireth at their hands He that beginneth well and holdeth not on loseth all the glory of his good beginning If the examples of all good children commended in Scripture be well weighed we shall finde their duties so farre forth as they were acceptable to God performed after the foresaid manner in all the branches thereof §. 53. Of the aberrations of children in the manner of their obedience Contrary are these aberrations 1. When children performe their duties on by-respects for feare of parents wrath and the punishment following thereon for hope and expectation of greater portion and allowâ—nce vpon instant perswasion of friends with the like these respects simply in themselues are not for the Lord. 2. When they performe them only outwardly in shew complementally while parents are in presence or may know thereof This is not with respect to God who seareheth the â—eart 3. When they performe them grudgingly mutteringly disdainfully as if their parents authority were an vsurped â—ower and not giuen them of God Is this in the Lord 4. When they performe them rudely and vnmannerly his sheweth they consider not the glory of Gods Image shiâ—ing in their parents 5. When they care not how they sinne against God so â—â—ey may please their parents 6. When as if they repented of what they haue well done â—â—ey refuse to doe any more duty to their parents They waxe â—eary thinking that God hath laid too heauy a burden vpon â—â—em Many shew themselues more dutifull in their youngâ—â— then in their riper yeares That which maketh children â—eary in doing duty is commonly the great and long neede of â—â—eir parents as long sicknesse long impotency long pouerty with the like It appeares that such children looke only on their parents as men which as they imagine can neuer recompence their paines and cost they looke not to God who is able abundantly to recompence all These therefore performe not their duty in the Lord. §. 54. Of the equall respect that children are to beare to both parents As the distinct duties of children haue beene set forth so I thinke it requisite to declare distinctly who the parties be to whom those duties are to be performed These principally are the naturall parents both Father and Mother Secondarily such as are in the place of parents The first point then to be noted is that children beare an equall respect to both their naturall parents and performe duty to both alike The law expresly mentioneth both Honour thy Father and thy Mother Well may we thinke that there was some iust and vrgent cause that the law which so briefly vnder as few words as well could be compriseth exceeding much matter should expresly mention father and mother when as there is one word parent which includeth both Now what other reason can be rendred then the point in hand It is worthy to be noted how the Apostle contenteth not himselfe to haue named parents which implieth both but also annexeth the expresse words of the law which in particular setteth downe father and mother It is expresly set downe of Iaakob that he obeyed his father and his mother Among other pen-men of Scripture Salomon expresly mentioneth both father and mother euen almost twenty seuerall times in Prou. Many reasons there be to inforce this point 1. Both parents are vnder God a like meanes of their
childrens being Children come out of the substance of both alike 2. The care and pains of both for the good of the children is very great I know not of whether the greater The mothers paines and care in bringing forth the childe is indeed the greater and it may be also the greater in bringing vp the childe especially while it is young at least if she giue it sucke her selfe yet afterwards the fathers exceedeth in prouiding fit calling sufficient meanes of maintenance yea and portion or inheritance for it and that after he himselfe is dead Thus one way or other the childe is equally bound to both and accordingly Gods law maketh no difference betwixt them Obiect The wife is subiect to her husband therefore a childe ought to preferre his father before his mother Answ Though there be a difference betwixt father and mother in relation of one to another yet in relation to their children they are both as one and haue a like authority ouer them Now children are not to looke to that difference that is betwixt their parents in that mutuall relation that is betwixt husband and wife but to that authority which both parents haue ouer their children and so to carry an equall respect to both 2. Obiect What if the fathers and mothers disposition be contrary and the one command what the other forbids Answ The thing commanded or forbidden must be obserued if it be about a thing simply good or euill lawfull or vnlawfull then the parent which would haue the thing lawfull to be done or vnlawfull to be for borne though it be the mother must be obeyed for in this case she is backt with Gods authority But if the matter be meerely indifferent then I doubt not but the father must be obeyed yet so as the childe no way shew any contempt to his mother but with all reuerence and humility make it knowne to her that it is best both for her-selfe and himselfe that his father be obeyed But if the fathers contrary authority be not interposed or if the father be dead then is a mother as simply and absolutely to be obeyed in all things as a father §. 55. Of pretences alledged to obey father rather then mother Contrary on the one side is their childish fondnesse who so wholly respect their mother and seeke to please her as they little regard their father vnlesse through feare they be forced thereto and on the other side their scornefull spirit who only beare respect to their father and altogether neglect their mother if not despise her For the most part of the two the mother is lesse regarded The reasons whereof I take to be these following whereunto I will annex particular meanes to remoue the seeming force of those reasons as antidotes or remedies vnto them 1. The mother by reason of her sex is commonly the weaker and subiect to more infirmities Answ Children ought rather to looke vpon their mothers place and authority then their person and infirmitie so these would no whit impaire their respect of the other 2. The mother is more indulgent and tender to her children and vseth more familiarity towards them now familiarity breedeth contempt Answ This is the abuse of familiarity loue should breed loue and loue must be ordered according to the condition of the parties louing and loued As children with one eie behold the affection of the mother so with another they should behold Gods image in the mother and then that which is noted as the ground of all childrens dutie a louing-feare would be wrought in their heart which would cast out all contempt 3. The mother hath not that power to reward or reuenge that a father hath Answ 1. This is not to obey in the Lord. No outward respect should moue the childe to obey his parents so much as conscience to God-wards If children duly considered God how he hath made no difference but commanded them to obey both alike and how he is able abundantly to reward and seuerely to reuenge that reason would be no reason 4. The mother is subiect to the father Answ This was remoued before As a generall answer to these and all other such pretences as can be alledged let it be noted that the Lord doth not only in expresse termes charge children to feare their mother but also the more to presse this point sometime setteth the mother in the first place thus Yee shall feare euery man his mother and his father which is not so to be taken as if the mother of the two were the more excellent in this respect the father for the most part is first named but because it is the truest triall of a childes subiection to be subiect to his mother He that willingly and conscionably subiecteth himselfe to her who is in relation to her husband the inferiour in sex the weaker in condition subiect to more infirmities in her affections lesse moderate in power lesse able to reward or to punish will much rather no doubt subiect himselfe to his father §. 56. Of the difference of childrens subiection to naturall parents and to such as only are in the place of parents Beside naturall parents there are others by God so set ouer children as they owe in conscience child-like dutie vnto them These in generall are such as are in the place of parents and so performe or at least ought to performe the dutie of parents to children They are of two sorts 1. Such as are ioyned to a naturall parent in mariage commonly called Step-fathers and step-mothers or fathers in law and mothers in law 2. Such as haue the gouernment and tuition of children committed to them commonly called Guardians Tutors Gouernours yea also foster-fathers and foster-mothers Quest Is the same dutie in euery respect due to those who are in place of parents as to naturall parents themselues Answ Not so There is such a prerogatiue appertaining to naturall parents from whom children haue receiued their being that many things wherein children by an absolute necessity are bound to them are bound vnto the other who are but in place of parents only by the law of honesty of meetnesse conueniency Whence it commeth to passe that such things as being done by children rebelliously without or against the consent of naturall parents proue meere nullities will stand in force though they be done without or against the consent of such as are only in the place of parents instance contracts made about goods lands and such other things as parents retaine a right in whereunto many good Diuines adde contracts of mariage of calling and the like Yet notwithstanding seeing in conscience we are bound to those things which the law of honesty and conueniency requirety for whatsoeuer things are honest iust and of good report are to be done great is that dutie which children owe to those who are in place of parents §. 57. Of childrens subiection to fathers and
causall particle for prefixed before it sheweth It is a generall reason drawne from common equitie a reason which may moue all sorts euen Infidels and Pagans therefore much more Christians In saying It is right he implieth three things 1. That it is agreeable to all law To the law of God which is the fountaine of equitie To the law of Nature which proceeds from thence And to the law of Nations which is answerable in many respects The forenamed proofes out of Gods word shew it to be agreeable to Gods law The precepts which heathen men haue giuen of this point shew it to be agreeable to the law of nature And the many Constitutions of Law-makers in all ages shew it to be agreeable to the law of nations 2. That the place of parents requireth as much For RIGHT requireth that euery one haue his owne that which is his due It being therefore right that children obey their parents that dutie â—s due to them 3. That parents deserue as much for right presupposeth deâ—ert That which is done of right is done by way of recompence The cause of this desert is the loue which parents beare to children the paine paines care and cost they haue beene at in bringing them forth and bringing them vp These things being implied vnder right note what followeth â—rom the force of this reason 1. Disobedient and vndutifull children transgresse against Gods law against common equitie of all nations and against light â—f nature so as they are vnworthy of the name of Christians â—hey are worse then Infidels yea worse then the brute beasts 2. They haue no respect to the place of their parents they disgrace the image of God which their parents by vertue of their place carrie and they disturbe that comely order and degree which God hath set among men 3. They ill repay their parents care and paines for their good and shew themselues both vngratefull and vnnaturall which are two most monstrous and odious sinnes §. 61. Of Gods accepting childrens obedience The forenamed reason is by this same Apostle in another place thus set downe This is well-pleasing to the Lord. By comparing that place with my text I obserue that What is right is well-pleasing to the Lord. And againe What is well-pleasing to the Lord is right These two propositions are as we speake in Schooles conuertible and reciprocall either of them true of the other euery way Wherefore the Apostle in another place ioyneth them both together For hauing exhorted children to recompence their parents he saith That is good and acceptable before God Good or honest is in effect the same that right This sheweth that dutifull children as they doe that which is good or honest and right vnto their parents so also therein they highly please God so as they may be sure not to lose thereby At Gods hand they shall receiue a reward though their parents should little regard their dutifulnesse Thus God dealt with Iaakob His father in law ill repaid his faithfulnesse but God looked vpon him and abundantly recompenced all his paines This sheweth againe that vndutifull children as they doe not that which is right but rather wrong vnto their parents so they highly displease God they may be sure therefore not to escape vnpunished though their parents through ouer-much indulgencie should let them alone instance the two impious children of Elie Hophni and Phinehas and the two rebellious children of Dauid Absolom and Adoniah This therefore addeth force to the second reason and moueth children to doe right to their parents by obeying them as they respect God his good pleasure or displeasure as they looke for recompence or feare vengeance from him §. 62. Of Gods charge how inuiolable a bond it is to tie children to obey their parents III. The third drawne from Gods charge is not only in expresse termes noted but for more weight the very words of the morall law are quoted Honour thy father and thy mother and it is added that this is a commandement yea the first commandement and that with promise all which is for amplification of the point Here then consider we 1. The reason it selfe 2. The amplification thereof  From the reason that it is Gods charge I gather these three points 1. That it is no arbitrary matter left to childrens discretion whether they will obey their parents or no but a matter whereunto in conscience they are bound euen as they owe alleageance to God himselfe the great law-giuer so as in neglecting dutie to parents children sinne euen against God himselfe for the same God who hath commanded vs to honour himselfe hath commanded vs to honour father and mother 2. That this is a perpetuall and a generall law a law whereunto all children of all times places sexes estates and degrees alwaies haue beene still are and euer shall be bound For the morall law is of that extent it is generall for all persons perpetuall for all times Therefore no children may thinke to be exempted from it Quest What if children be growne to yeeres and not vnder their parents gouernment Answ There may be some difference both in some parts of subiection and also in the manner of subiection betwixt such children as remaine vnder their parents gouernment and such as are freed from it but yet so long as a childe hath a parent of what age or estate so euer he be he oweth an honour vnto his parent Ioseph when he was a great Gouernour of Egypt a man growne hauing wife and children yet performed the honour of reuerence obedience and recompence vnto his father Salomon when he was in an higher place then Ioseph euen an absolute King did the honour of Reuerence to his mother 3. That no man can giue children any dispensation or ex emption from their dutie to parents If any may he must be either the law-maker himselfe or one greater then he one that hath power ouer him Now God is the author and giuer of that law God spake all these words c. But is any greater then God hath any power ouer him Who then can dispence with children in this kinde Hence then I inferre these two conclusions 1. That the Popes dispensation is nothing worth they who make it to be of force must make him greater then God which is a horrible blasphemy 2. Though parents themselues should not exact dutie of their children yet children were bound to performe dutie to them because of Gods charge To this therefore are children to looke This sheweth that there is no lesse paine hanging ouer the heads of the transgressors of this charge then the curse of the law eternall condemnation §. 63. Of the title FIRST giuen to the fift commandement In the amplification of the forenamed reason the Apostle stileth the commandement of honouring parents the first with promise as to shew that it is the first which hath a particular promise
hereof as Abrahams Isaacks Rebekahs and others Great reason there is why this affection should be fast fixed in the heart of parents towards their children For great is that paine paines cost and care which parents must vndergoe for their children But if loue be in them no paine paines cost or care will seeme too much Herein appeareth the wise prouidence of God who by nature hath so fast fixed loue in the hearts of parents as if there be any in whom it aboundeth not he is counted vnnaturall If loue did not abound in parents many children would be neglected and lost For if parents look not to their children who will If none looke to them they must needs perish for they are not able to helpe themselues As God by nature hath planted loue in all parents so Christians ought euen for conscience sake to nourish increase and blow vp this fire of loue that they may thereby be made more forward to doe euery duty with cheerefulnesse The more feruent loue is the more readily will euery duty be performed Obiect As too much fire is dangerous so too much loue Answ True Wherefore as in other things so in this the golden meane must be kept No dutie so holy and necessarie â—ut may be peruerted Let the extremes be auoided and the meane will better be kept §. 3. Of the contraries to loue The extreme contrary to loue in the defect is want of naturall affection which is reckoned in the catalogue of notorious â—â—nnes Though loue of children be by nature engrauen in mans heart yet many cleane put it out through couetousnesse â—â—st vaine-glory superstition idolatry and other vices whereby it commeth to passe that in stead of the good which they â—ould doe for their children they bring much mischiefe vpon â—hem Some spare not the pretious life of their children Among these barbarous idolaters doe most exceed in this kinde of vnnaturall cruelty sacrificing their children and offering them vp to deuils To this the great bloud-sucker Satan of old brought not only the heathen who being ignorant of God did seruice to the diuell but also the Israelites to whom Iehouah the true God made himselfe knowne and expresly forbid this cruelty and that vnder paine of death Behold how superstition and idolatry blinde the eies of men They who haue beene among the Sauadges in Virginea Florida India and other like places testifie that such cruelty is vsed to this day And it is rendred as a maine reason why notwithstanding such spacious places as they haue they increase no more in multitude because many of their children from time to time are offered vp in sacrifice Reasonable men herein shew themselues more vnreasonable then vnreasonable beasts which doe what possibly they can to preserue their young ones Though not so high yet too high on this ladder of vnnaturalnesse doe they climbe who hate their children and that which maketh the sin to be out of measure sinful for piety and integrity as many Popish and profane parents who haue children truly religious and in that respect ought so much the more to be loued The extreme in the excesse is too much doting vpon children as they doe who so vnmeasurably loue them as they make reckoning of nothing in comparison of children Euen God himselfe is lightly esteemed his worship neglected his word transgressed all dutie to others omitted their owne soules forgotten thorow care of children Is not this meeâ—â— apish kindnesse for Apes kill their young ones with hugging This is no loue but plaine dotage But what may be said of those that are so hellishly enamoured with their children as to commit incest or buggery with them §. 4. Of Parents praying for their children The first and best streame which issueth out of the forenamed fountaine of loue is faithfull and feruent prayer This extendeth it selfe to all things at all times thorowout the whole course of the childes life It is the first and it is the last dutie which parents ought to performe to their children euen that which they must doe without intermission Pray without ceasing Though praier be a generall dutie which all Christians owe one to another yet after a peculiar manner doth it appertaine to parents and of all others they are most bound to it For the promise which God maketh to a parent is extended to his seed and children as these and such like Scriptures shew I will be thy God and the God of thy seed That it may be well with them and with their children The promise is vnto you and vnto your children Parents therefore with most assurance of faith may call vpon God for their children For Gods promise is the ground of faith so farre as Gods promise is extended so farre our faith may and ought to extend it selfe Hence hath arisen the commendable custome of childrens asking their parents blessing which intimateth a desire that parents would pray for Gods blessing on them This dutie of praier must be performed before parents haue children that they may haue some as Isaak Annah and others did and so soone as children are conceiued especially if they obserue them to be quicke in the wombe as Rebekah did and againe when they are borne as Zachariah did and thorowout the whole course of their life as Iob did and when they are going out of this world and leauing their children as Isaak did There is no one thing wherein and whereby parents may doe more good for their children then in and by true praier God hath sanctified praier as a meanes to receiue all needfull blessing from himselfe the fountaine of all blessing If therefore Gods blessing be of vse to children what Atheists are they that beleeue it not then also is praier by which it is obtained §. 5. Of vices contrary to parents praying for their children The very neglect of this dutie is a sinne contrary to the dutie it selfe and many parents there be that stand guilty of this sinne Some thinke it needlesse to pray for a childe before it be borne not considering that in sinne it is conceiued When it is borne they referre this dutie to the midwife whereas it properly appertaineth to the father After it is growne to any ripenesse they put it off to the childe to pray for it selfe And when they are on their death-bed they thinke it enough if they can pray for their owne soules Such parents shew little true loue to their children but lesse faith in God But what may we say or thinke of such impious parents as feare not to make fearefull imprecations against their children God oft in wrath and vengeance heareth such imprecations to the woe of parent and childe whereby he sheweth his great indignation against them for the same §. 6. Of parents endeauouring to be righteous that they may leaue Gods blessing to their
children Another generall branch proceeding from parents loue to their children is that for their childrens sake they endeauour to walke vprightly before God and to please him This I doe the rather note because I finde the reward promised to righteous parents to be extended vnto their children The generation of the righteous shall be blessed saith Dauid And Salomon Blessed shall his children be after him and againe The good man shall giue inheritance vnto his childrens children This motiue is therefore vrged by the holy Ghost to prouoke parents vnto all righteousnesse Thus doth the Lord extend the reward of righteous parents vnto their children to shew his great good liking and high approbation of righteousnesse Reade for this purpose 1 King 11. 34. 2 King 10. 30. 1. Obiect The righteousnesse of the righteous shall be vpon himselfe Answ That is meant rather of a mans personall righteousnesse and grace it selfe which is not communicated to children then of the fruit thereof That faith in Christ feare of God obedience to Gods word or any other personall grace which is in righteous parents shall not iustifie or saue their children For the iust shall liue by his owne faith Yet this hindereth not but that the benefit and blessing of righteous parents may fall vpon their children according to the extent of Gods promise 2. Obiect By experience we finde it verified that the children of some righteous parents are cursed and the Scripture giueth vs many examples thereof as Cain Cham Absolom and others like them 1. Answ Such children by their vnworthy and degenerat cariage make forfeiture of Gods couenant and so depriue themselues of the benefit thereof 2. Answ Many good reasons may be giuen why God should sometimes alter his course and with-hold his blessings from the children of his seruants As 1. Lest Gods gifts and blessings should otherwise seeme to come rather by naturall propagation from the parent then by free donation from God 2. Lest parents should thereby be drawne to neglect the meanes of good education 3. Lest children also themselues trusting too much to their parents righteousnesse should take too much liberty and waxe licentious 4. Lest Gods free election should seeme hereby to be restrained 3. Obiect If this be so what motiue can it be vnto parents to labour after righteousnesse for their childrens sake Answ Though God doe reserue in himselfe a freedome to order his blessings as it pleaseth him and to bestow them vpon whom he will and thereupon sometimes blesseth the childe of a wicked parent instance Hezekiah denieth his blessing to the childe of a righteous parent instance Ammon yet in that it is a very vsuall course with him to extend his blessing according to his promise to the children of the righteous it is a strong motiue to such as desire the good of their children the rather for their childrens sake to endeauour after righteousnesse for thus doe they vse the meanes which by Gods word is warranted and sanctified for procuring Gods blessing to their children Leaue therefore a good memory to thy children rather then much wealth §. 7. Of the preposterous course which couetous and vniust parents take for the good of their children Contrary is the course of such parents as by vnrighteous meanes thinke to prouide well for their children For many doe not only too carkingly and distrustfully moile and toile to scrape together great masses of money or great store of land or other stockes for their children neglecting duties of piety and mercy but also by vniust and wrongfull courses defraud others to make their children rich So common is this vndue course of prouiding for children as thence hath arisen this prouerbe Happy are those children whose parents goe to the deuill A cursed prouerbe For what other thing can it intend but this that they who feare not God nor take care for their owne saulation will haue most respect to the outward estate of their children and be most carefull to make them great and rich in this world Wherein note how many waies they bewray their notorious folly 1. They preferre the outward estate of their children before the eternall saluation of their owne soules Yea and before God himselfe 2. They place the happinesse of their children in the goods of this world then which nothing more vaine 3. They make themselues drudges to their children and so debase themselues below that dignity which by reason of Gods image on them appertaineth to them 4. They with much paines care griefe and feare are long gathering that which their children in short time most riotously and prodigally will lauish out 5. They make themselues vassals to Satan and seeke by him to be made rich whereas indeed it is the blessing of God that maketh rich Thus they take a wrong course to get wealth If it be said that many are thus made rich I answer that as God gaue a King to Israell so he giueth wealth to them in wrath and in wrath will he take it away 6. They bring Gods curse into their house and leaue it vnto their children So as these are the riches that are reserued to the owners thereof for their euill Let not therefore care for children draw thee to any coueteous or vniust courses but know that he who made thy sonne made thee also and he who affoorded thee meanes of nourishment will also affoord thy children sufficient succour §. 8. Of Parents prouidence for their children The head whereunto all the particular duties which parents owe to their children may be referred is A prouident care for their childrens good This extendeth it selfe to all times and to all things To all times as to the infancie youth and man-age of their children and that not only while parents liue but after their departure To all things namely tending both to the temporall good of their children and also to their spirituall good Children are of the very substance of their parents therefore ought parents so farre to seeke their childrens good as their owne The patternes of holy parents recorded and commended in Scripture doe liuely set forth this prouident care But this generall we will exemplifie in the particulars and in order declare how parents must prouide both for the temporall and also for the spirituall good of their children in euery degree of their age They who at any time in any thing are negligent and carelesse of their childrens good offend in the contrary to this generall dutie The heinousnesse of which offences will appeare in the particulars §. 9. Of a mothers care ouer her childe while it is in her wombe The first age of a childe is the infancie thereof I will therefore first shew how therein parents must procure the temporall good of their children and then their spirituall good The first part of a childs infancie is while it remaineth in the mothers wombe Here therefore the
childe he gaue in charge to the Parent so to name him saying to him Thou shalt call his name thus and thus It is also euident that the time of Baptisme is the fittest time for giuing the name Vnder the Law childrens names were giuen at their Circumcision and so vnder the Gospell it hath in all ages beene vsed and that for these reasons 1. That their names may be a testimonie of their baptisme 2. That so oft as they heare their names they may be put in minde of their baptisme 3. That they might know how by name they are giuen to Christ to be his souldiers and therefore there must be no starting from him 4. That they may also be assured that being baptized with water and the spirit by name they are registred in heauen Now because names are so solemnly giuen and of so good vse most meet it is that fit names should be giuen to children And for proofe hereof let the names which in Scripture are recorded to be giuen by God himselfe and by such holy men and women as were guided by his spirit be obserued and we shall finde them to be holy sober and fit names For direction to parents in this dutie I will set downe some sorts and kinds of names as be fit and beseeming Christians 1. Names which haue some good signification and among them such as are warranted by the Scripture as Iohn the grace of God Ionathan the gift of God Andrew manly Clement meeke Simeon obedient Hannah gratious Prudens wise and such like that thus their name may stirre them vp to labour after the vertue signified thereby 2. Names which haue in times before vs beene giuen to persons of good note whose life is worthy our imitation as Isaak Dauid Peter Marie Elizabeth and such like that the names may moue them to imitate those worthies 3. Names of our owne ancestors and predecessors to preserue a memorie of the familie which appeareth to haue beene an ancient practise euen among Gods people in that the friends would haue had Zachariahs sonne named Zachariah and when the mother had iust cause to name him Iohn they answer none of thy kindred is called by this name 4. Vsuall names of the country which custome hath made familiar as Henry Edward Robert William and such like among vs. §. 21. Of Parents care in bringing their children to be baptized in due season Though Christians are not so strictly tied to a set day as the Iewes were to the eight day yet from that strict direction giuen to the Iewes we may well gather that it is not meet for Christians to defer the baptizing of their children beyond eight dayes for a young childe of that age may with more ease and lesse danger be baptized then circumcised The most seasonable time I take to be the day whereon Gods people vse in the place where the childe is borne publikely to assemble together to worship God next after the birth of the child if at least it fall not out within two or three dayes after which is somewhat with the soonest both for mother and childe Whether we respect the honour of God the riches of whose mercy is liuely set forth in the sacrament of baptisme or the good of our childe which in that sacrament receiueth a pledge and seale of that rich mercy of God Baptisme is of great consequence and therefore the first season of performing it to be taken For parents by their diligence and due speed therein giue euidence both of their zeale to Gods glory and also of their earnest desire of the childs spirituall good §. 22. Of Parents faults in neglecting their childrens Baptisme Contrary to the forenamed dutie of Parents about well baptizing their children are many aberrations as 1. The corrupt opinion of Anabaptists who denie the lawfulnesse of baptizing children The arguments before noted are sufficient to stop their mouthes 2. The practise of Separatists comming too neere to Anabaptisme who excepting against the ministerie and orders of our Church doe what they can to keepe their children from that Sacrament And to that end carry their wiues ready to be deliuered vnto a strange place where they are not knowne and anon after they are deliuered priuily conuey wife childe and all away that so the Magistrate may not against their will cause their childe to be baptized and hauing no ministerie of their owne nor meanes to conuey the childe ouer sea keepe it many yeeres vnbaptized Where is the euidence of their faith in Gods promise of their respect to Gods ordinance and of their desire of their childs spirituall good Though it be a great wrong to children to be kept from baptisme yet the sinne lieth on such parents as procure not baptisme for their children especially at that age when their children cannot gainsay it 3. The peruerse opinion and practise of certaine ancient heretikes who in stead of baptizing children with water had them branded with an hot iron They grounded their error on a false interpretation of this phrase he shall baptize with the Holy Ghost and with fire Answ 1. They erre in taking this word fire literally and properly which was meant mystically and metaphorically 2. They erre in applying that to the outward action of a Minister which was meant of the inward operation of Christ By this their misinterpretation they thwart the maine scope of him who first vsed that phrase which was to manifest the difference betwixt all other Ministers and Christ Iesus 4. The opinion and practise of those who vse other formes of Baptisme besides this In the name of the Father and of the Sonne and of the Holy Ghost Their opinion and practise is grounded on certaine concise phrases vsed by the Apostles such as these Baptized in the name of Iesus Christ In the name of the Lord In the name of the Lord Iesus c. Answ Those phrases rather set forth the very substance and inward matter of Baptisme then the forme thereof 5. Their opinion and practise who care not by whom their children are baptized whether heretiques idolaters laicks or women Little doe they regard the comfort of conscience and strength of faith that ariseth from this that a lawfull Minister in Gods roome and name as Gods ambassador putteth the seale of God to his couenant 6. The practise of those as I know not vpon what nicenesse or state must haue their children baptized at home in their priuate house This manner of baptising taketh away much from the honour of that high ordinance which ought to be done with all the seemly solemnitie that may be 7. Their practise who bring their childe to Church to be baptised accompanied only with the Midwife and three witnesses It were almost as good be baptised in a priuate house for it is not the walls of the Church but the assembly of Saints that addeth to the honour of the Sacrament and is most of all
to be respected 8. Their practise who vpon state or for great witnesses or such by-respects put off the baptising of their children longer then is meet some two or three weekes some two or three moneths some longer whereby they shew too light esteeme of this Sacrament in that they preferre meere complementall circumstances before a matter of so great moment God oft sheweth his iust indignation against such in taking away their â—hildren vnbaptised before the time set downe by them for baptisme be come 9. Their practise who care not what heathenish idolatrous â—idiculous names they giue to their children What respect â—oe they shew either to God in whose name their childe is â—aptised or to the holy Sacrament it selfe or to the congregaâ—ion of Saints before whom the name is giuen or to the childe â—â— selfe who all his life is to carrie that name §. 23. Of parents prouiding things needfull for the life and health of their children Hitherto of the duties of parents respecting their childrens Infancie Such as respect their childhood follow The childhood of a childe is â—eckoned from the time that it â—eginneth to be of any discretion and vnderstanding till it be â—t to be placed forth euen so Many distinguish the whole course of a mans life into foure parts 1. Childhood 2. Youth 3. Man-age 4. Old-age long as ordinarily it liueth vnder the parents gouernment The duties which parents for this time must performe to their children may be drawne to these two heads 1. Care to bring them vp 2. Care to place them forth For their well training vp respect must be had both to their temporall and also to their spirituall good Two things are required of parents in regard of the temporall good of their children 1. To nourish them well 2. To nurture them well Children must be well Fed. Taught  Child-hood from his birth to 14. yeeres Youth from 14 to 25. Man-age from 25. to 50. Old age from thence to his death But for better distinguishing the duties which parents are to performe I follow not so accurate a diuision but rather distinguish the degrees of age according to the times wherein new duties are to be performed and therefore I make a distinction betwixt infancie and childhood Feed them in discipline saith the Apostle Vnder nourishment are comprised all needfull things for health and life which parents ought to prouide for their children as 1. Food which Christ taketh for a ruled case Whence he draweth his argument to shew that God will prouide for his children What father saith he if his sonne aske him bread would giue him a stone c. Mat. 7. 9 10 11. 2. Apparell for it is expresly noted that Israel made his son a coat Gen. 37. 3. 3. Recreation which in young children especially is needfull for their health In that Zachary chap. 8. vers 5. told the Iewes and that in way of blessing that boyes and girles should be playing in the streets he implieth that it is a lawfull and meet thing which parents should permit vnto their children But yet the time and measure and kinde of recreation must be well ordered 4. Meanes for recouery of health when they are sicke for this end was it that Ieroboam sent his wife to the Prophet in behalfe of his sonne who was sicke that the Ruler came to Christ for his sonne also who was at point of death and that many others came to him for their sonnes and daughters being ill Whatsoeuer other things are needfull parents to their power must prouide for their children else the Apostle counteth them worse then Infidels Both equitie and necessitie require thus much of parents Equitie in that children owe all their paines and seruice to their parents while they are vnder them and are wholly at their command and in that regard haue no meanes to prouide needfull things but by their parents helpe Parents therefore in all right must herein be helpfull to them Necessitie in that if the life and health of children be not well prouided for no dutie no seruice can be expected at their hands §. 24. Of parents too much niggardlinesse and carelesnesse toward their children There are two extremes contrary to the forenamed prouident care of parents for their childrens good In the defect Couetousnesse In the excesse Lauishnesse Some parents so farre faile in the defect as they almost starue their children through want of necessaries not affording them sufficient wholesome food nor meet and comely appaâ—ell but suffer them to goe tagged and ragged like beggars â—rats if they be sicke God may recouer them if he please but the parents will vse no meanes when they are well they afford them no time of refreshing themselues by any recreation but â—uer-strictly hold them in There is not only want of charity â—ut plaine vnnaturalnesse in such parents euen more then in â—â—e most cruell beasts For the wilde beasts doe with much tenâ—ernesse prouide for their young ones §. 25. Of parents too much lauishnesse and indulgency vpon their children Others surpasse as much in the excesse feeding them too â—â—intily attiring them too garishly tending them too cockeringly and letting them spend too much time in sport and play Many and great are the mischiefes that follow thereupon as 1. They who are in their childhood daintily fed and too much pampered besides that for the most part they are most sickly they will in time grow so squeamish and choice of meats as their parents shall not know what to prouide for them or when to giue it them The full soule loatheth an hony combe yea if a stranger commeth to the table where such a childe sitteth he may soone obserue that he hath beene too daintily fed If at first children be fed with ordinary moderate diet they will afterwards both be in better health and liking and also more contentedly and thankfully accept whatsoeuer shall be prouided for them But excesse breedeth diseases both in body and minde 2. Vanity in apparell doth also much corrupt young children for there is in them euen from the cradle a naturall disposition to outward brauery now for parents to pranke them vp what is it but to blow vp the fire of that vanity and make it arise into such a flame as in time may much scorch the parents themselues and vtterly consume the children and yet how vsuall a fault is this how monstrously doe many parents offend therein what foolish fashion is vsed of the greatest swaggerers and lightest strumpets which they will not bring their children vnto and that when their children are not able to discerne betwixt stuffes or colours what can this proclaime but parents pride and folly Proud maids are many times the instruments of pranking vp children especially when they are little ones more then is meet but yet the blame lieth on parents for suffering it 3. Tending children too cockishly maketh them too long children and too tender and oft
shew of religion in them no maruell that they haue no manners If some examples of such as are truly religious and want good manners should be shewed their patterne is no president much lesse can it proue that to be no duty which Gods word hath set downe for a duty Many that well performe some duties much faile in other duties Who almost followeth Gods word as he should in euery thing §. 30. Of parents suffering their children to be rudely brought vp Contrary to parents care in teaching their children good manners is dissolutenesse when parents suffer their children to grow vp in rudenesse not caring how they carry themselues at home or abroad toward their parents or toward others Rude bringing vp maketh children to be of a crooked peruerse stubborne churlish furly doggish disposition as on the other side good nurture in this kinde breedeth in genuity amiablenesse curtesie and kindnesse If such as are rudely brought vp be children of professors of the true religion they bring a staine vpon their profession yea they dishonour God as if he were the author of vnmannerlinesse and confusion against which the Holy Ghost protesteth and they make themselues and their children a scorne in the eie and mouth of profane persons who will be ready to point and say Behold the children of professors how rudely they are brought vp and ill taught they haue not so much as good manners in them For auoiding this blemish Schoole-masters and all such as haue the charge of trayning vp young children must bean helpe to parents in teaching children good manners §. 31. Of parents training vp their children to some good calling The second branch of good nurture is a training vp of children vnto a good calling This charge traine vp a child in the way that he should goâ— directly condeth to this purpose This duty hath from the beginning of the world beene performed by parents and their performance thereof commended by the holy Ghost Adam brought vp his sonnes to seuerall callings one was a keeper of sheepe another a tiller of ground The like is noted of Iaakobs sonnes Labans and Reguels daughters Ishas sonne and many others Much good may from hence arise to parents themselues to their children and to the people and places where such children shall liue 1. A good calling is an especiall meanes for children to maintaine themselues and family to releeue those that stand in need to ease their parents and if the need of parents require it to releeue and maintaine them 2. It is that way wherein Gods Angels haue a charge to keepe them while they walke in it 3. It is a meanes wherein and whereby they may be seruiceable to the common wealth where they liue 4. It is the best place wherein the generall duties of Christianity may be most manifested and best performed 5. It is the best ordinary meanes that can be prescribed to keepe a childe from the vanities of youth from immoderate pursuit of pleasures from vnlawfull games from idlenesse from ill company and such like euils which as they are sinnes in themselues so occasions and prouocations to other most â—grieuous and enormous sinnes and proue to be the very â—bane of youth Obiect Many parents haue good lands to leaue to their children what need is there of a calling to such Answ 1. Much land may soone be consumed by such as haue not skill well to vse it 2. Maintenance is but one end of a calling and that not the chiefest and most principall 3. More good may be done by skill in a calling then by great store of land 4. We are borne for others as well as for our selues it is not therefore sufficient to say I haue enough to maintaine my selfe §. 32. Of parents care in choosing a fit calling for their children The point in generall being declared to be a dutie I will adde some directions for the better performing of it 1. Children are to be trained vp in those things which are the ground worke of all callings as reading writing and principles of learning Whatsoeuer the particular calling be these will be of great vse to any one Many that haue not beene taught them at first would giue much for them afterwards Parents at the first might teach their children those things with much ease and small charge which afterwards cannot be so well learned partly for want of leasure and partly because the parts of those who are growne in yeares are not so fresh and fit to learne as in child-hood they were Those things are not to be contemned as small without which great things cannot stand 2. The calling whereunto children are trained vp must be lawfull approued by Gods word and not against the generall rules thereof so may they keepe a good conscience in the exercise thereof 3. The calling must be fit for the childe that is trained vp to it As there are diuers callings so there are diuers abilities of sundry children some are fittest for callings of wit and learning others for callings that require an able and strong body Wherein the wise disposing prouidence of God is much commended for thus are men much more vsefull one to another Now for choise of a fit calling a childs best ability wherein especially it consisteth whether in the exercise of minde or of body is duly to be obserued and also his inclination to what calling he is most disposed 4. Among fit callings for there may be many that which is best and the most excellent is to be preferred To this purpose not vnfitly may I apply that of the Apostle ccuet earnestly the best gifts On this ground let parents be exhorted to traine vp such children as they finde fit to the great and weighty calling of the ministery no calling wherein any may doe more good and wherein if they be able and faithfull Ministers they can receiue more comfort and contentment This exhortation is the more to be regarded because in comparison of those who are trained vp to other callings so few are trained vp to this § 33. Of parents faults contrary to their dutie of training their children vp to a calling On the contrary many parents much offend in not training vp their children to a calling as they should And the offence in this kinde is committed many waies As 1. When parents suffer their children to liue like little masters at home and passe ouer all their youth in idlenesse Thus they proue very drones and caterpillars in the common wealth if they haue a patrimony they soone waste it if they haue none they oft proue either theeues or beggars they are fit for all companies the readiest prey for the deuill that can be for they are like the house empty swept and garnished which when the euill spirit espieth he presently entereth into it with seuen other spirits worse then himselfe The wise law-maker among the heathen is
said to order that the childe which by his parents had beene taught no Art should not be forced to nourish them though they were old or poore This I all eage not to iustifie the law for it is against the Christian rule of ouercomming euill with goodnesse but to shew how the very heathen iudged the neglect of this dutie a great fault in parents 2. When parents neglect to teach their children in their child-hood the generall and common grounds of all callings some vpon niggardlinesse others vpon carelesnesse Thus poore men make their children vnfit for many meanes whereby they might well maintaine themselues and rich men make theirs vnfit for magistracy and for good society Yea poore and rich are thus nousled vp the more in ignorance and made the more vnfit to profit by the preaching of the word and other meanes of spirituall edification 3. When parents bring vp their children in vnwarrantable and vnlawfull callings as to be of popish and idolatrous orders to attend vpon papists to be stage-plaiers keepers of dice-houses c. Some which is horrible to thinke of traine vp their daughters to be common strumpets and some which is yet more horrible traine vp their children to be sorcerers and witches How can they in these keepe a good conscience when the very workes of their calling are sinne Is not this to thrust them headlong into hell They who thus binde their children to the deuils sacrileges are spirituall murtherers of them 4. When parents haue no respect at all to the fitnesse of the calling as when they traine vp children of able bodies but dull and slow capacity of a stuttering tongue and other like imperfections to learning wherein they proue very dunces and lose all their time or are not able to make vse of the learning which they haue or when they traine vp children which haue a great inclination to learning and are very fit thereunto in some other trade which after many yeeres speut therein they are forced to leaue 5. When parents only seeke after the most gainfull trade and neuer thinke to educate their children most to the honour of God How can such expect Gods blessing vpon the meanes vsed for their childrens good Hence is it that among Papists so many are trained vp to Ecclesiasticall orders and functions and so few among Protestants For there is very great maintenance and reuenues for such among Papists but little in comparison among Protestants §. 34. Of parents teaching their children piety The spirituall good of children and that in their childhood is to be procured by parents as well as their temporall Wherefore Parents must traine vp their children in true piety This is expresly commanded in my text vnder this phrase admonition of the Lord. Vnder the law God did both simply command it and that very often and also ordained diuers outward rites and caused many visible and extraordinary monuments to be set vp that thereby children might be occasioned to aske of their parents the mysterie of them and that parents from that inquirie of their children might take occasion to teach them the ordinances of the Lord. This expresse charge of the Lord is further commended by that practise which holy parents from time to time haue yeelded thereunto instance the examples of Abraham Dauid Bathsheba Lois and Eunice with many others 1. Pietie is the best thing that a parent can teach his childe for as reason maketh a man differ from a beast and as learning and ciuilitie maketh a wise and sober man differ from sauages and swaggerers so pietie maketh a sound Christian much more to differ from the most ciuill and well ordered naturall man that can be Learning ciuilitie calling portion are all nothing without pietie Now it is an especiall point of wisdome to seeke the best good that we can as for our selues so also for our children yea this is an euident signe of a parents true loue of his childe 2. There is a necessitie that children be taught pietie because they are not borne but made Christians by nature they are vtterly destitute of all pietie for by nature euery imagination of the thoughts of mans heart is only euill continually Gen. 6. 5. and in that respect man is borne like the wilde asse colt Iob 11. 12. so as a man were better be vnborne then not taught pietie 3. The charge and office of parents bindeth them to teach their children pietie for they are by God made watchmen ouer their children if therefore their children liue and die in impietie through their parents negligence their bloud shall be required at their parents hands instance the example of Elie. Obiect This dutie appertaineth to Ministers Answ 1. God hath giuen an expresse charge hereof to parents as we heard before 2. In the familie a parent is all in all ouer his childe a King a Priest and a Prophet Therefore that which a Minister is to doe for matter of instruction in the Church a parent must do at home 3 Children haue need of daily instruction the parents paines in this kinde must be added to the Ministers and both are little enough 4. Parents hauing more familiaritie with their children then Ministers must needs better know their capacitie and their disposition and so may better know after what manner to instruct them whether to giue them milke or strong meat whether to deale mildly or roughly with them 5. Instructions from parents are commonly more kindly accepted then from others and children will the better rellish them when they come from their parents They say that a plant will best grow in the soile out of which it first sprung so instructions comming from those who both brought vs forth and first brought vs vp are like to doe most good 6. There is no such meanes to breed loue in a childs heart as to be an instrument of bringing piety thereinto Now who should more seeke the true loue of a childe then a parent In this respect a parent is more bound to this dutie then a Minister 7. It is impossible that a Minister who it may be hath many hundred children vnder his charge should well instruct them all It is therefore requisite that each parent looke to his owne children As these distinct answers satisfie the obiection so they serue as so many more reasons to inforce the dutie wherefore to proceed in adding other reasons 4. Great equitie there is that parents teach their children piety because they conceiued and brought them forth in iniquitie If they suffer them to lie and die in that corrupt estate they are more cruell then the Ostrich and Dragon 5. Children are most properly Gods borne to God he is the most proper parent of them in comparison of God fathers and mothers of the flesh are but nurses They must therefore nurture them in the admonition of the Lord. 6. Pietie is that
of solemniâ—ing that day And as God doth any great workes of mercy â—r of iudgement point them out to children When there is great famine plague or any mortality instruct children in â—he causes thereof when victory plenty peace or the like â—ach children from whence these come Outward sensible things doe best worke vpon children 7. Let religious schoole masters be chosen for children soâ—â—ewise other masters to whom children are put forth and religious houses where they are placed Hannah commended â—er first borne childe to old Eli a good religious high Priest ◠〈◊〉 â— masters themselues be religious there is good hope that they will instruct in piety such as are vnder them which if they â—oe what an helpe will that be to parents If both parents and masters ioyne therein it must needs be very profitable to â—e children If parents should faile yet might masters make a â—ood supply 8. Let parents be to their children a good patterne and example in pietie I and my house saith Iosua will serue the Lord he setteth himselfe first as a guide to the rest I will walke in mine house with a perfect heart saith Dauid whereby he would make himselfe an example as to others of his family so to his children Example is a reall instruction and addeth a sharpe edge to admonition Much more shall a religious parent doe by practise then by precept For children are much inclined to follow their parents let them goe before children will soone follow after Practise is an euident proofe of the necessitie of the precept deliuered §. 36. Of Parents faults contrary to their dutie of teaching their children piety Many are the aberrations contrary to the forenamed care of teaching pietie For 1. Most parents care only for the temporall and ciuill good of their children so their children may be well fed and clothed and brought vp in some profitable calling whereby they may well maintaine themselues in this world little thought is had or care taken for their spirituall life in this world or eternall life in the world to come Wherein are these parents better then heathen Iob was otherwise minded he was more carefull for their soules then for their bodies 2. Many are so farre from teaching piety as they teach their children profanenesse pride riot lying deceit and such like principles of the deuill It had beene better for such children to haue liued among wilde beasts then vnder such parents As the children hereby are thrust headlong to hell so their blood shall be required of their parents 3. Others thinke it enough that their children be taught a religion but what religion it skilleth not Such are they as hauing rich kindred but popish commend their children to the education of such kindred in hope of some temporall benefit that their children may reape from them If they were as carelesse of their childrens bodies they would be accounted little better then murtherers and is not the soule more pretious then the body 4. So farre are many from catechising their children and that daily as they teach them not so much as the Lords praier the Beleefe and the ten Commandements Wherein Papists shall rise vp in iudgement against them that are very diligent in teaching their children Pater noster Aue Maria and such like Latine principles as the children cannot possibly vnderstand 5. Few vse the forenamed outward helpes as the holy rites appointed of God the great and glorious workes of God his extraordinary workes of mercy or iudgement to instruct their children thereby As they themselues care not to take notice of any such thing so they care not whether their children doe it or no. 6. So much doe some preferre a little pelfe before the true good of their children as they care not to what schoolemaster they put their children be he profane or popish or vnlearned especially if he be a kinsman or one of their friends Few will so doe in case of their health or outward estate but will rather get the best Physitian or the best Lawyer that they can Children oft learne such euill qualities of their schoolemasters as they can neuer shake off againe 7. Many proue very bad patternes to their children and giue very ill example by profanensse riotousnesse swearing drinking playing at vnlawfull games c. These parents as they brought forth their children in sinne so they lead them on forward to hell Their euill example is not only an hinderance to the good instruction of others but also maketh all their owne counsells if at any time they doe giue any good counsell to be in vaine for the left hand of euill example soone pulleth downe more then the right hand of instruction can build againe To conclude those parents whose children are not brought vp in the instruction of the Lord shew plainly that they regard neither the saluation or damnation of their soules §. 37. Of instructing children so soone as they are capable Hitherto of the Kindes of nurture The Time thereof followeth In handling the time of good nurture I wil shew 1. When it ought to be begun 2. How long it ought to be continued  1. Parents ought to begin to nurture their children so soone as they are capable of any instruction Euen as young birds are taught by their dammes to flie so soone as their wings can carry them Traine vp a childe saith Solomon that is while he is young and tender and againe He that loueth his childe nurtureth him be times Thus was Samuel sent when he was very young to be trained vp vnder Eli 1 Sam. 1. 24. and Solomon was instructed by his father when he was tender Pro. 4. 3. and Timothy was taught the Scriptures from a young childe or infant There are both priuatiue and positiue reasons to presse this point Priuatiue in regard of the mischiefes that may be preuented thereby Positiue in regard of the good that may be gained thereby 1. Many are the euils which children by nature are prone vnto euen as ranke ground is subiect to bring forth many weeds for the imagination of mans heart is euill from his youth and foolishnesse is bound in the heart of a childe If therefore they be not well nurtured betimes what can be looked for but the fruits of euill and folly But timely nurture will preuent such fruits and be an excellent preseruatiue against their owne naturall corruption against Satans temptations and against the allurements or discouragements of the world 2. Continuance in euill maketh children obstinate and inflexible therein Elies sonnes being suffered to goe on in wickednesse till they came to ripenesse of yeeres would not afterwards harken to the voice of their Father What creature can be tamed if it be not begun with while it is young 3. When children first begin to be capable of instruction they are most pliable to follow the direction of their parents as
is euident by the ordinary course of nature in all things Clay wax and such other things while they are soft receiue any impression twigs while they are tender are bowed any way birds and beasts are easily tamed when they are young corne sowne betimes bringeth a timely and plentifull haruest 4. That which in childhood is learned is longest retained Traine vp a childe in the way he should goe and when he is old he will not depart from it A vessell longest keepeth that sauour with which at first it is seasoned and by experience we may note old men best to remember the things which in their childhood they learned yea by well educating children from their infancy much labour may afterwards be spared for constant vse of vertue bringeth it vnto a law Obiect To teach children while they are young is but as to teach a Parrot or such like vnreasonable creatures they may learne what is taught them but they cannot conceiue it 1. Answ Though children haue not so deepe an apprehension while they are young as they haue when they come to riper yeares yet so soone as they are capable of instruction they doe much better conceiue what is taught them then vnreasonable creatures can doe 2. Though that were granted yet it would not thereupon follow that it is better not to be taught while they are young For first it is better that they should be framed and squared to a good course before they can discerne betwixt good and euill â—hen be suffered to runne on in euill till they get an habit â—herein which after it is got will hardly be cast off Secondly by teaching them before they can well conceiue their apprehension is much helped What may be the reason that â—hildren of kings and great men are commonly of more vnderstanding at 12. or 14. yeares of age then poore and meane â—ens children at 17. or 18. but that they are sooner and beter instructed Thirdly as by age their vnderstanding commeth to more and more ripenesse they will more and more â—â—nceiue that which at first they did not so well vnderstand Then schollers first learne their Latine rules they learne them â—eerely by rote without vnderstanding the meaning of them â—t afterwards come to make very good vse of them Whereâ—â— children are to be instructed betimes euen for the benefit at may be after reaped as corne is sowne in winter to receiue â—â—op the haruest following and to preuent the mischiefes at may fall out lest they get head ouer their parents against â—ir minde §. 38. Of mothers peculiar care in nurturing young children By the way let mothers especially note this point of timely nurture as a point in peculiar appertaining to them The grandmother Lois and mother Eunice first taught Timothy Bathsheba taught Salomon when he was young Oft doth Salomon warne children not to forsake their mothers teaching Whereby he implieth that mothers should teach their children especially while they are young which duty so belongeth to a mother as Salomon laieth the blame and shame of the neglect thereof vpon her on the other side the honour of well nurturing children redoundeth especially to the mother To this purpose is it that the particular names of the mothers of the kings are recorded in Scripture intimating thereby that mothers were a maine cause of the piety or impiety of such children Salomon and Absolom had both one father but diuers mothers May we not well thinke that Salomons mothers care to instruct him was an especiall meanes of his piety and that Absoloms mothers neglect of this duty was some cause of his impiety It is expresly noted of Ahaziahs mother that she was his counseller to doe wickedly which made him so wicked as he was Home-experience confirmeth as much for if father and mother be of diuers religions most of the children will follow the mother For while children are young their mother is most in their sight she feedeth she apparelleth them she tendeth them when they are not well when the Shunemites childe being ill said to his father my head my head he said to his seruant carrie him to his mother Her precepts therefore and practise in that respect are best heeded by the children and she hath the best opportunity to perswade them to what she liketh best so as what they learne in their younger yeares commonly they learne of their mothers and that which then they learne for the most part sticketh most close vnto them and is longest retained by them as was noted before I haue not thus in particular pressed this point vpon mothers as if I exempted fathers from all care of nurturing their children in the beginning for in my text the Apostle named Fathers and Salomon saith that his father taught him eueâ— while he was tender and Dauid felt the smart of neglecting hiâ— other children It is therefore as hath before beene proued a ioynt duty belonging to both Fathers therefore must doe their best endeuour and see that mothers doe theirs also because he is a gouernour ouer child mother and all §. 39. Of letting slip the best time for nurture Contrary is the negligence of most parents who let the best yeares wherein their children are most docible passe ouer in wantonnesse vanity and folly and so lose that which can neuer be recouered againe most precious time Hence is it that when they goe about to reclaime their children they finde them exceedingly peruerse and head-strong much like to a strong bigge arme of a tree which if a man goe about to straiten he cannot easily make it bow and though it bow yet will it not continue to stand as he would haue it nay it may be that it will rather breake then bow much Such a branch was Adoniah It is apparent that in his childhood he was not well nurtured for his father would not displease him from his childhood The fathers putting off this duty to the mother and the mothers putting it off to the father is a great cause of the neglect thereof Were both of them perswaded that it belonged to them both and in that respect would to their power be helpfull each to other children would much better be instructed §. 40. Of parents continuing to nurture their children As parents must begin betimes to nurture their children so they must hold on therein as long as they retaine any gouernment ouer them yea so long as they remaine to be parents vnto them Some difference there may be in the manner of performing this duty for children are to be vsed as children and they who are growne in yeares and of riper vnderstanding accordingly to be dealt withall yet still must parents haue a care of their well doing The word vsed in my text and translated Children is a generall word which in Scripture and other writers is vsed to set forth all sort of children of what sexe of what age of what degree
soeuer they be In handling the duty of children we shewed that children owed a subiection to parents so long as they liued together wherefore by the rule of relation so long also an authority remaineth in parents ouer their children and accordingly they ought to haue a fatherly care for their good On this ground Eli did well in admonishing his children after they were maried his fault was that he went not farre enough in doing his duty somewhat he did but not all that he should and might haue done Iob is commended for the care he had ouer his children when they were growne in yeares for day by day he sent for them and sanctified them and that after they had seuerall houses of their owne and dwelt apart and this all their daies For the performance of that which is now vrged parents must so carrie themselues from time to time towards their children as they euer keepe the reines in their owne hands and retaine a power to curbe their children as they see occasion They may as their children grow vp in yeares slaken the reines more and more but neuer let them cleane goe and cast them loose on their childrens necke §. 41. Of parents folly in letting goe all their power ouer their children Contrary is their folly who put themselues in their childrens power and let goe all their authority ouer them Many parents that haue thus done hauing by wofull experience found the mischiefe and inconuenience that hath followed thereupon haue much repented their folly and vsed meanes of redresse but all too late For a mischiefe is much more easily preuented then redressed All the power that Dauid had could not hold in Absolom after he was permitted to haue horses and chariots and men at his command If Dauid as he begun had continued to keepe him within a compasse and still held him vnder all the treasonable plots which he put in execution might easily haue beene preuented Our times afford too many examples of parents folly in this kinde and of the mischiefes following thereupon Of Time of nurture thus farre The meanes thereof follow §. 42. Of adding admonition to instruction The meanes of helping forward the good worke of nurture are especially two 1. Frequent admonition 2. Due correction Both of them are implied in this text one in the word translated admonition which according to the notation of the Greeke word is a putting of a thing into the mind an vrging and pressing of it the other in the word translated nurture Now both these are to be ioyned together as being very helpfull each to other For admonition without correction is like to proue but meere vanity and correction without admonition will be too much austerity The dutie which the first of these setteth forth is this Parents must oft whet instruction vpon their children they may not thinke it enough to tell their children what they ought to doe but to instruction they must adde admonition and as it were beat into their childrens heads the lessons which they teach them that so they may make a deeper impression in their hearts Thus shall their instructions be like the words of the wise which are as nailes fastened or fast knocked in they remain firme where they are once fastened and cannot easily be pluckt out for as many blowes doe knocke a naile vp to the head as we speake so many admonitions doe settle good instructions in a childes heart and cause that the heart be established in that which is taught which is a thing to be laboured after The generall exhortation of being instant in season and out of season may be applied to this purpose but more pertinently that direction which is in particular giuen to parents of whetting Gods words vpon their children To this purpose is it that Solomon vseth to double his instructions and vrge them againe and againe as heare the instruction forsake not the law receiue my words hide my commandements within thee incline thine eares apply thy heart c. yea of the repeateth the very same precepts The apprehension of children is fickle and their memory weake if they be but once or seldome or sleightly instructed that which is taught will soone slip away and doe little or no good For the better performing of this dutie parents must thinke of the best meanes they can to fasten their instructions vpon their children and obserue their inclination and disposition and see with what they are most moued Constant exhortations and powerfull perswasions are comprised vnder admonition which in their kindes as occasion requireth are to be vsed §. 43. Of parents wearisomnesse in instructing their children Contrary is the practise of those parents who soone waxe weary in instructing their children The Apostle laieth it downe as a generall caueat in good duties that we wax not weary if in no good thing we must wax weary shall parents wax weary in doing good to their children Yet how many be there that hauing once taught their children thinke they haue done dutie enough in that kinde if their children will take it they may They are loth to take too much paines in often vrging the points which they haue taught them Thus that teaching vanisheth away and so it falleth out as we say in the prouerbe as good not at all as neuer the better This is one point wherein old Eli failed for he gaue very good instruction to his children but because he there staied neither was that accepted of God as a sufficient discharge of his duty nor were his children any whit bettered thereby If this were a fault in him notwithstanding his children were come to yeares of discretion and to ripenesse of vnderstanding how much greater is the fault in those whose children are but young Obiect If a childe take not instruction at first he is but of an vntoward and peruerse disposition all the paines that can be taken will be lost Answ It may be childishnesse rather then peruersnesse or some imperfection rather then obstinacy Considering the necessity of good nurture no paines may be thought too much There is more peruersenesse and vntowardnesse i◠such parents as wax weary in doing this dutie then in such children as at first are not wrought vpon for this is a means ordained of God to cure this vntowardnesse §. 44. Of parents reprouing their children The other meanes of helping nurture is correction Which is of two sorts Verball by Words Reall  Blowes  The former is reprehension and it must alwaies goe before the latter which is most vsually and properly called Correction Reprehension is a kinde of middle thing betwixt admonition and correction it is a sharpe admonition but a milde correction It is the rather to be vsed because it may be a meanes to preuent strokes and blowes especially in ingenuous and good natured children for a reproofe entereth more into him that is wise
then a hundred stripes into a foole and because it may be vsed when it is not so meet to vse strokes and blowes as when children are growne to man-age The many good fruits which the holy Ghost noteth to proceed from due reproofe doe shew that it is a dutie whereof parents ought to make conscience as they desire to promote the good of their children and so much the rather because many good fruits redound to the parents that reproue as well as to the children reproued In regard of their good who are reproued it is said Reproofes for instruction are the way of life they cause vnderstanding and make prudent In regard of their good who reproue it is said To them that rebuke shall be delight that is much comfort and matter of reioycing so as they shall not need to repent what they haue done and a blessing of good shall come vpon them that is either a blessing of good men who will blesse praise and commend them or a blessing of good things and that from the Lord who will reward them for this conscionable performance of their dutie Vpon these grounds holy men haue not spared to rebuke their children as there was occasion Though Eli did somewhat in this duty yet because he was not more seuere therein â—he brought destruction both vpon himselfe and his children The direction noted § 40. and 47. and Treat 4. § 35. may be here applied §. 45. Of parents cockering their children Contrary is their too much doting on children who are â—oth to giue them a foule word Dauid though otherwise a â—very wise man herein manifested much folly for he displeased â—ot Adoniah at any time in saying why hast thou done so and like enough it is that also he so cockered his other rebellious sonne Absolom Note the fearefull issue that followed thereupon both to father and children Though their father would not displease them yet they cared not to displease their father yea to grieue his heart and vex his soule The like may all foolish doting parents looke for at their childrens hands For first parents by neglect of this dutie highly displease God therefore in iust reuenge will God giue their children ouer to displease and vex them Secondly neglect of reproofe is a meanes to make children rude presumptuous rebellious and so carelesse to please their parents Yea all things where in children offend through want of education shall be required at their parents hands §. 46. Of correcting children The latter and more proper kinde of correction which is by stripes and blowes is also a meanes appointed by God to helpe the good nurture and education of children It is the last remedy which a parent can vse a remedy which may doe good when nothing else can It is by the holy Ghost both expresly commanded and also very oft pressed vnder these and such like phrases Châ—sten thy sonne correct thy sonne with-hold not correction from the childe thou shalt smite him with the rod. Were there no other motiue this were sufficient Gods charge was such a motiue to Abraham as at it he would haue sacrificed his sonne and wilt not thou at Gods command correct thy childe It is further commended by Gods owne example which is not only set forth in some particular instances but by his generall constant dealing with all and that as an especiall token and fruit of his loue For whom the Lord loueth he chasteneth and scourgeth euery sonne whom he receiueth If ye be without chastisement wherof all are partakers then are ye bastards and not sonnes Let this example of God be well weighed for it is of great weight Who can better tell what kinde of dealing is fittest for children then God Who can better nurture children then God Who doth more truly aime at and procure the good of children then God Yea who doth more tender children then God If God the father of spirits in wisdome and loue thus deale with his children fathers of the flesh may not thinke by the contrary to shew wisdome or loue Their wisdome will be folly their loue hatred Vpon these grounds it is taken for a thing granted that parents who tender the good of their children as they should doe chastise their children as need requireth for it is said that the Lord correcteth whom he loueth as a father the sonne in whom he delighteth If parents vsed it not this were no good inference to say as a father againe as a thing without controuersie it is said we haue had fathers of our flesh which corrected vs. The grounds of the equitie of this dutie respect partly the children corrected and partly the parents that correct In regard of children it freeth them from much euill and worketh in them much good Correction is as physicke to purge out much corruption which lurketh in children and as a salue to heale many wounds and sores made by their folly In which respect Solomon saith that Foolishnesse is bound in the heart of a childe but the rod of correction shall driue it farre from him and againe The blewnesse of a wound is a purging medicine against euill so doe stripes the inward parts of the belly In regard of the inward operation of this physicke correction is further said to preserue a childe from death if thou beatest him he shall not die and that not only from temporall death as many children are thus preserued from the Magistrates sword but also from eternall death thou shalt deliuer his soule from hell Note this ye cockering parents whose ouer-much lenitie is very great crueltie For may we not iustly count him a cruell parent that should suffer diseases boiles sores and wounds to remaine increase and fester in his childe and giue him no physicke nor apply any plaisters or medicines to him Nay rather who seeth his sonne running into a flaming fire or deepe water and would not hold him backe Euen so cruell and more cruell are they who suffer their children to runne on in euill rather then correct them Obiect Who can endure to make his owne childe smart and to put him to paine Answ The future fruit is more to be considered then the present paine Potions pills and corasiues are fulsome bitter and painfull but because there is a necessitie of vsing them and great mischiefe is preuented by the vse of them wise parents will not forbeare them for the sensible bitternesse and paine Fitly doth the Apostle thus answer that obiection No chastning for the present seemeth to be ioyous but grieuous neuerthelesse afterward it yeeldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousnesse This may be applied to parents corrections as well as to Gods The good which correction bringeth to children is by Solomon noted in this and such like phrases The rod giueth wisdome for it maketh children obserue what is good and what euill what commendable and what
blame-worthy and accordingly to doe the good and leaue the euill which is a great point of wisdome Obiect Instruction will better doe this Answ Instruction may giue them more knowledge but it is correction which bringeth them to practise what they know which is the chiefest point of wisdome In regard of parents due correcting of their children both freeth them of many inconueniences and also bringeth to them much quiet 1. It spareth them much paines For many admonitions oft repeated and inculcated againe and againe will not make many children so much to heed wholsome and good aduice as a little correction They are much more sensible of smart then of words 2. It preuenteth much griefe shame and vexation for a foolish sonne is a griefe to his father and bitternesse to her that bare him But it is the rod of correction that driueth away foolishnesse and so preuenteth that griefe and bitternesse 3. It freeth them from the guilt of their childrens sinne so as they are not accessarie thereto as Eli was For correction is the last remedie that a parent can vse if by that he can doe no good it is presupposed that he hath done his vttermost endeuour in which respect though the childe die in his sinne yet the parent hath deliuered his owne soule The quiet which is brought to parents by correcting their children is thus noted out by Solomon Correct thy sonne and he shall giue thee rest yea he shall giue delight vnto thy soule For children well nurtured and by correction kept in a filiall awe will so carrie themselues as their parents may rest somewhat secure and not disquiet themselues as they doe with children set at libertie yea as trees well pruned and ground well tilled they will bring forth pleasant and abundant fruit and so their parents will haue iust cause to reioyce in them §. 47. A direction to parents in correcting their children For well vsing this biting corasiue of correction parents must haue respect to the matter for which they doe correct and to their manner of correcting In regard of the matter these three things must be noted 1. That they be sure there is a fault committed that so there be iust cause of correcting else more hurt then good will proceed from thence If a corasiue be laid where there is no sore it will make one If correction be vniustly giuen it may prouoke to wrath but will doe little good This is it wherein earthly fathers are taxed and made vnlike to God for that many times they correct after their owne pleasure which is a point of great iniustice 2. That the fault be made knowne to the childe corrected and he apparantly conuinced thereof Correction must be for instruction which cannot be except the childe know why he is corrected for it is all one to him as if he were corrected for no fault if he know not his fault God thus a first proceeded with the serpent with Eue and with Adam Thus Iudges proceed in punishing malefactors Yea thus will men deale with a dog Should they not much more with a childe 3. That the faults be such especially as the parents can shew to their children if at least they be of so much discretion to be against Gods word as swearing lying pilfring and the like for 1. these are most dangerous faults and therefore more carefully to be purged out 2. the childe corrected will thus be the better euicted of his fault the more condemne himselfe and more contentedly beare the correction In regard of the manner of correcting foure generall and foure particular rules are to be obserued The generall rules are these 1. An eye must be had to Gods manner of correcting his children and in particular of Gods correcting the parent himselfe no better generall direction can be giuen for Gods patterne is a perfect rule 2. Prayer must be made by parents for themselues and for their children for themselues to be directed in doing it for their children to be bettered by it Thus will good Physitians in ministring physicke In all duties is prayer to be vsed especially in this for a parent is ready partly through his owne intemperate passion and partly through the childs impatiencie to fall into one extreme or other This is not to impose vpon all whensoeuer they take vp the rod to goe and make a solemne prayer but to lift vp the heart for direction and blessing 3. Correction must be giuen in loue All things must be done in loue much more this that carieth a shew of anger and hatred In loue they will giue physicke to their children and splinter a ioynt if need be God correcteth his children in loue so must parents Loue will make them doe it with tendernesse and compassion 4. Correction must be giuen in a milde moode when the affections are well ordered and not distempered with choler rage furie and other like passions Disturbed passions cast a mist before the vnderstanding so as a man cannot discerne what is enough what too much When passion is moued correction must be deferred God correcteth in measure The particular rules are these 1. Due order must be kept Correction by word must goe before correction by the rod. I rebuke and chasten saith the Lord. Thus a parent will shew that he taketh no delight in smiting his childe it is necessitie that forceth him thereunto Thus a parent sheweth himselfe like to God who doth not punish willingly Lam. 3. 33. Physitians when they minister strong physicke will giue a preparatiue rebuke may be as a preparatiue Good and pitifull Chirurgions will try all other meanes before they come to launce and seere 2. Due respect must be had to the partie corrected if he be young and tender the lighter correction must be vsed Solomon oft mentioneth a rod as meetest for a childe for that is the lightest correction So if the childe be of a flexible and ingenuous disposition soone sneapt the correction must accordingly be moderated If he be well growne and withall be stout and stubborne the correction may be more seuere 3. Due respect must be had to the fault Sinnes directly against God open notorious scandalous sinnes knowne sinnes sinnes often committed in which they are growne vp and whereof they haue gotten an habit are with greater seueritie to be corrected 4. A parent must behold his owne faults in correcting his childes so more compassion will be wrought in him §. 48. Of parents too much indulgency Contrary to this dutie of correcting are two extremes 1. Too much lenitie 2. Too much seueritie Many so cocker their children as they will suffer them to run into any misdemeanour rather then correct them They cannot endure to heare their children cry and therefore their children must be pleased in all their humours and euill desires These parents bring shame to themselues and mischiefe vpon their children for God is oft
forced to correct such Heauy are Gods corrections and oft light on parent and childe both as appeareth by the iudgement on Eli and his sonnes for such parents make themselues accessary to their childrens sinnes yea also to the iudgements laid vpon their children God saith of such parents that they honour their children aboue God It is therefore a fond indulgency which maketh parents regard neither Gods honour nor their owne or childrens safetie Mothers for the most part offend herein who are so farre from performing this dutie themselues as they are much offended with their husbands if they doe it And to proclaime their folly to all the world they cannot commit their children to a Tutor or Schoole-master but with a strait charge that they correct them not Obiect Correction maketh children sots and blocks Answ If Gods spirit deserue to haue more credence then such foolish women that obiection is most false for we heard before how correction giueth wisdome and driueth out foolishnesse 2. Obiect Mothers may be the more borne with herein because with long trouble they did beare and with great trauell bring forth their children Answ That may be a good motiue for them to seeke the true good of their children that so their trouble and trauell may not be in vaine but not to vphold them in the broad way that leadeth to destruction §. 49. Of parents too much seueritie in correcting their children They who offend in the other extreme of seuerity of the two are the more vnnaturall parents they offend directly against the first branch of this text Prouoke not to wrath Nothing more prouoketh then immoderate seuerity for 1. It argueth no loue in the parent but rather hatred at least wrath and other such like distempered affections 2. It softeneth not the childes heart but hardeneth it rather 3. It maketh him dull and stupid and cleane peruerteth the right and true end of correction 4. It oft maketh a childe thinke of doing some mischiefe to his parent or himselfe That parents may the rather take heed of this extreme I will briefly note wherein excesse in seueritie is shewed It is shewed when correction is giuen 1. For no fault In this case though correction be neuer so light it is too seuere 2. For small faults in wrath and furie though the stripes be few and light yet the parents behauiour is too much seueritie 3. To children that are young and tender or soft milde and ingenuous as if they were in some yeeres the most obstinate and peruerse that could be 4. Too often for euery thing done amisse whereas parents should seeme not to see or heare many things which they see and heare 5. Too sorely so as the childe is lamed or some way so hurt as he shall feele it as long as he liueth §. 50. Of Parents care in prouiding fit callings for their children Hauing laid downe such duties of parents as especially respect the childhood of children I proceed to lay forth such as haue respect to their riper yeeres wherein they are to be placed forth Here we are to note 1. The kindes of those duties 2. The meanes of performing them  The kindes may be drawne to two heads 1. Prouiding fit places and callings for them to exercise their gifts 2. Prouiding fit mariages for them We heard before how children were to be trained vp and fitted to some good calling euen in their childhood Now further when by vertue of good education they are inabled to discharge the functions and duties of a calling and by yeeres they are well growne vp so as it is time they should be set to some particular calling Parents ought to prouide fit callings for their children and fit places for them to exercise the gifts which by nature or education they haue gotten For example If children haue beene brought vp in learning parents must vse what lawfull and honest meanes they can to settle them in such a place and course as they may professe and exercise their gifts according to their seuerall kindes be it Diuinitie Law Physicke or the like or if they haue beene brought vp in any trade to prouide that they may set vp as we speake and exercise their trade The two first children that euer were borne of woman Cain and Abel were placed forth in seuerall callings and without doubt their places were so ordered by their parents The like may be gathered out of these phrases Esau was a man of the field and Iaakob dwelt intents It is noted of Samuel that he made his two sonnes Iudges Had they beene as faithfull in well vsing their places as their father was carefull in prouiding them they might haue liued well themselues and done much good to others Ishai hauing many sonnes had a care hereof for he sent his three eldest sonnes to the war and placed them in a souldiers course of life his youngest he made a shepheard which was in those daies and places a calling of greater reckoning then now it is with vs. 1. Thus shall they make vse of that abilitie whereunto by their parents prouidence and their owne diligence they haue attained otherwise that abilitie may soone be lost Doth not daily experience shew that many who haue beene well trained vp by their parents in learning so farre as they haue beene fit to haue entred into the ministerie for want of place and imploiment haue in time so forgotten all as if they had neuer beene trained vp in learning and so in other sciences 2. Thus come they to doe much more good in Church or Common-wealth till men be placed in distinct callings they are but fitting and preparing for future times I denie not but that both Church and Common-wealth may reape much benefit by the paines and labour of the younger sort who are trained vp vnder others but most properly are they counted members of the Church and Common-wealth and actuall instruments of the good thereof who haue some particular distinct calling whereby they doe good to others 3. Thus they come to liue of themselues and to be able to releeue others also All the time of their education they are commonly at the charge of others at least though by their paines they may gaine much yet the gaine returnes to others they themselues for the most part haue but a bare maintenance meat drinke and cloth as we say little haue they to lay vp for themselues for the time to come or to giue to others for the present 4. They thus come to traine vp others against after times as they themselues haue beene trained vp whereby a continuall and perpetuall succession of all kindes of callings is from time to time preserued and thus Family Church and Common-wealth vpheld and maintained In short time would all callings and functions vtterly decay if a continuall supplie were not thus made §. 51. Direction for parents in prouiding callings for their children Two
especiall cautions are to be obserued by parents in prouiding callings for their children 1. That such callings be prouided as their children haue beene trained vp vnto and are in some measure fitted and enabled to performe the duties thereof as to prouide a Ministers place for him that hath beene brought vp in learning and studied diuinity so in other callings such as their children may be their crafts-masters therein Thus shall their children doe the more good therein both to others and themselues Bezaleel and Aholiab were chosen to build the tabernacle because they were filled with wisdome to worke all manner of worke likewise the seruants of Hirom were chosen to hew Cedar trees for the temple because among the Iewes there were not any that could skill to hew timber like vnto the Sidonians Pharaoh was carefull to haue men of actiuity rulers ouer his cattell 2. That such meanes be vsed for prouiding a calling as parents in vsing them may with faith call vpon God for his blessing They that by lawfull meanes are brought into a calling whereunto they are fitted are set therein by God as is implied by this phrase as God hath called euery one c. A lawfull entrance into a calling is a matter of great moment he that so entreth may in a right vse thereof cast himselfe vpon Gods blessing and with strong confidence expect the same saying as the Prophet did Lord I haue not thrust in my selfe thou knowest §. 52. Of the extremes contrary to a parents lawfull care in prouiding fit callings for his children The extreme in the defect contrary to a parents prouident care in prouiding a fit calling is a carelesse neglect of children after they are well educated a leauing them to shift for themselues It is noted of the rauenous fowles that haue sharpe talents that so soone as they perceiue their young ones to be able to fly they will flap and beat them with their wings and driue them out of their nests and after that take no further care of them We may not be like such cruell birds reason â—nd religion teacheth vs otherwise Good education is a good duty but not a parents whole duty the stay which is here made may make all the former care and paines to be of little â—â—se Obiect This is to be left to Gods prouidence Answ Meanes rightly vsed are subordinate to Gods prouidence and by them doth God manifest his prouidence and bring his counsell to passe to neglect meanes is to thwart and crosse the diuine prouidence It is therefore well done to rely on Gods prouidence but ill done to neglect the meanes of effecting it Gods blessing is best discerned in the vse of meanes The extreme in the excesse is a preposterous greedinesse in parents to bring their children to a calling This is manifested two waies 1. When they care not how fit their children be for the place so it be a place of gaine and honour Experience sheweth that this is the bane of Church and commonwealth Hereby it falleth out in the politique body as it would in a naturall body if the hand should take vpon it to see or the leg to heare or the foot to taste what could from thence be expected but ruine to the body Trades-men oft vndoe themselues their families and friends by vndertaking such trades as they haue no skill in or whereof they are not crafts-masters The more excellent the calling is the more mischiefe is done by this greedy preposterousnesse This extreme is so much worse then the former as it is worse to doe much hurt then no good 2. When they make no conscience of the meanes which they vse to bring their children into callings but by vnlawfull meanes purchase their desires as by Simony to procure an ecclesiasticall function whence oft followeth also periury or by bribery to procure an office These indirect meanes take away difference betwixt fitnesse and vnfitnesse of persons for the vnfittest that be may by money purchase a place Besides though children be neuer so 〈◊〉 for these callings yet there is little hope of any blessing from God when the first entrance is without him yea against his will and word Who can thinke that God hath placed such aâ— one in his place if God haue not placed him with what faith can he seeke a blessing with what hope can he expect a blessing Much terror is by this meanes brought to many men conscience and they are oft in a great strait not knowing whether it be fittest for them to retaine or relinquish theâ—â— place But by the way to resolue that doubt if one that hath vnlawfully entred be fit for the performance of his place it then safest for him to seeke pardon for the former offence and reconciliation with God and vpon true and vnfained repentance to hold the place if at least the law vnder which he liueth establish him therein and be so much the more faithfull in the discharge of the duties thereof §. 53. Of parents care in prouiding fit mariages for their children God hath further laid a charge vpon parents to prouide mariages for their children for thus saith the Prophet in the name of the Lord vnto parents Take wiues to your sonnes and giue your daughters to husbands and thus the Apostle If any man thinke that he behaueth himselfe vncomely toward his virgin if she passe the floure of her age and need so require let them marry This direction was giuen in times of persecution when by reason of the present necessity it was better not to marry if then a parent ought to be carefull need requiring to prouide a mariage for his daughter much more ought he in times of peace Holy parents commended by the Holy Ghost haue beene carefull in performing this duty as Abraham Isaak Naomi and others yea Hagar had learned this duty in Abrahams house But the perfect patterne which surpasseth all other examples is of God himselfe who prouided a fit match for his sonne Adam 1. Children may not marry without consent of parents as was before shewed Parents therefore must be carefull in time to prouide for them 2. Parents are to children in Gods place they must therefore take vpon them this care of God 3. Mariage is the meanes which the Lord hath sanctified to preserue our bodies chaste and vndefiled as parents therefore desire to keepe their children from vncleannesse and pollution they must take care that this meanes be vsed Not only holy Apostles but also heathen Philosophers and that by the light of nature haue found this to be the fittest course 4. This also is a meanes as to increase the commonwealth and preserue an holy seed and to erect new families so to continue parents owne houses and name §. 54. Direction to parents in prouiding mariages Two cautions are to be obserued of parents in prouiding mariages
for their children 1. That the match which they prouide be meet so said God when he was about to prouide a match for Adam I will make him an helpe meet for him Therefore the match prouided must not be too neere of kin of a contrary religion of too vnequall an age of too great disparity in estate These things will hinder loue and cause disdaine and hatred of one another 2. Though the match may seeme meet in the parents eie yet he may not force his childe thereto Could a fitter match haue beene found out for Rebekah then Isaak yet Rebekahs friends asked her consent I denie not but parents may vse all manner of faire meanes to moue their children to yeeld to that which they see good for them but if they cannot moue them to yeeld to referre the matter to God and not against their childrens minds to force them When God had made a most meet match for Adam he brought her to the man namely to see how he would like her For the neerest bond of all is betwixt man and wife a man must leaue father and mother and cleaue vnto his wife man and wife must alwaies liue together great reason therefore that at the first ioyning them together there be a mutuall liking of one another lest euer after there be a perpetuall dislike and though the authority of parents ought in this case to be inuiolable yet a middle course is so to be held as the parties may willingly with a mutuall consent ioyne themselues together §. 55. Of the extremes contrary to parents care in prouiding fit mariages for their children The extreme in the defect is when parents carelesly let their children passe the floure of their age and neuer consider whether need require that they should mary or no. Their children may sit long enough before they seeke out a match for them vnlesse it be brought to them and when one is offered though it be neuer so fit yet except they may make an aduantage thereof to themselues they will hardly yeeld to it Thus they make their children to seeke out mariages for themselues and without their consent to make them vp or else to liue in discontent if not in vncleannesse By the carelesnesse of parents in this respect are children oft made a prey to the deuill whereof at the day of iudgement parents shall giue an account to God The extreme in the excesse is when parents through a couetous desire to get great and rich matches for their children marie them before they be of yeares of discretion to like or dislike to know what is meet or vnmeet or able to performe euen the essentiall duties of mariages seldome doe such vnlawfull mariages prosper In a like excesse doe they offend who for outward aduantages match their children to such as by nature are vnfit for mariage to ideots to idolaters to profane persons or they care not to whom And if their children like not these matches they will doe to the vttermost of their power what they can to force them thereunto Many mischiefes ordinarily fall out vpon such mariages as vtter dislike betwixt husband and wife continuall complaining one of another inquiring after diuorce or any other separation wishing yea practising one anothers death To all these mischiefes doe parents the cause thereof make themselues accessary §. 56. Of parents prouiding a stocke for callings and mariages of their children An especiall outward meanes whereby parents may be the better inabled to prouide fit callings and mariages for their children is before hand to lay vp some stocke or competent portion for their children This is comprised vnder that generall prouision whereof he that is carelesse is counted by the Apostle worse then an insidell but more expresly is it noted in these words Parents ought to lay vp for their children and commended in Abrahams example While children are vnder their parents they haue no meanes to lay vp for themselues for all their seruice is for their parents But in regard of the times wherein we liue it is needfull for setting vp in a good calling and for obtaining a fit match that children haue some stocke and portion It lieth therefore vpon the parents and their duty it is to prouide it Obiect Christ forbiddeth to lay vp treasures on earth Answ If the scope of that place be rightly marked it will appeare that Christ there forbiddeth not simply the thing it selfe but 1. The minde of him that layeth vp namely when it is filled full of carking and distrustfull thoughts fearing that in the time to come he shall not haue sufficient To this purpose doth Christ propound Gods prouidence ouer fowles and lillies 2. The manner of laying vp when temporall things are preferred before spirituall and heauenly therefore he addeth this precept but lay vp treasures in heauen c. 3. The measure when men neuer thinke they haue laid vp enough but scrape what they can come by iustly or vniustly and spare more then needs euen things necessary from themselues and others to make a great stocke and portion for their children The word of treasuring vp which Christ there vseth implieth an immoderate measure Among other needfull cautions for parents to be obserued in laying vp for their children these three are especially to be noted 1. That iustly they come by that which they lay vp and lay nothing towards a childs portion which is any way vniustly gotten for the treasures of wickednesse profit nothing they may proue a fire to consume parents themselues their children their house and whole posterity 2. That they couet not too much to make their children rich and for that purpose liue meanly and basely themselues yea and depriue themselues of many necessaries An egregious point of folly is this which Solomon hath much taxed 3. That all needfull duties of charity to the poore and of iustice to the Church and common-wealth be performed and pretext of laying vp for children hinder none of these §. 57. Of the extremes contrary to a parents prouiding portions for his children The extremes contrary to the forenamed dutie are these 1. When parents liue at the vttermost extent of their estate and from time to time spend all their reuenues or all their gaines and so are scarce able to make euen at quarter day or yeares end What stocke or portion can they lay vp for children 2. When parents liue aboue their estate and spend riotously their ordinary gaines or reuenues and for other necessary affaires are forced to runne into debt Many are so farre from helping their children in this kinde as they are maine hinderance vnto them vrging their eldest sonne especially who is their heire to be bound for them and so lay such a burden on his backe as to vse the common phrase they make it cracke againe 3. When parents haue enough for themselues and their children and yet so
couetously dote vpon their wealth as they will not bestow a groat to helpe them in calling and mariage but say they keepe all for them What a wretched and foolish disposition is this that they should still lay vp more and more for their children and yet refuse to bestow any part thereof vpon them in their greatest need when it might redound to their greatest benefit God oft meeteth with such couetous misers and crosseth their purposes by making strangers to enioy that which they greedily hoorded vp §. 58. Of parents last speech to their children The last dutie which parents owe to their children is when they cease to be parents that is when they are going out of this world Their dutie at that time in generall is to doe what lieth in them that it may goe well with their children after their departure Both the reasons which are oft vrged by the Holy Ghost to stir vp parents to yeeld obedience to God taken from extent of Gods blessing in this kinde of phrase Blessed shall their children be after them and Gods promises made to that purpose doe proue as much For the better performing of this dutie three generall points tending both to the temporall and also to the spirituall good of children are to be obserued and two particular points most tending to their temporall estate The three generals are these 1. Good direction 2. Faithfull prayer 3. A wise choise of some friends to be as parents to them 1. For direction When parents obserue their time to draw neere they ought to commend some wise and wholsome precepts vnto their children the better to direct them in their Christian course So did Isaak and Iaakob Ob. These Patriarchs had an extraordinarie spirit of prophecying by vertue thereof foretold their children things to come Answ They sustained a double person one of a prophet another of a father as prophets they had an extraordinarie spirit as parents they performed ordinarie dutie by their extraordinarie spirit they foretold things to come the ordinarie dutie which they performed was to direct their children how to carrie themselues in those times to come For their prophesies were not only predictions but also instructions to direct and teach them what to doe What they did by an extraordinarie spirit in extraordinarie things we must doe in ordinarie duties by the ordinarie spirit of vnderstanding and wisdome which the Lord giueth vs. But the direction which Isaak gaue to Iaakob when he sent him to Laban was no extraordinarie prophesie nor that which Dauid when he was old gaue to Solomon and againe when he lay on his death-bed Now these things are thus written for our imitation And great reason there is to imitate those holy men in these things For 1. The words of a dying parent are commonly most regarded his last words doe make a deepe impression this doe the brethren of Ioseph presse vpon him If euer therefore there be a time seasonable for a parent to giue good instructions to his children then is the time when parents are cleane departing from their children 2. Thus shall a parent manifest his true affection and earnest desire of his childrens good for now they cannot thinke that he seeketh his owne ease and profit more then their good as at other times some will be ready to say of their parents instructions and admonitions Our parents know what is good for themselues That the last words of parents may be the more seasonably and profitably deliuered to their children they must note on the one side what euils their children are most prone vnto what temptations they are most assaulted withall what snares they are most like to fall into and on the other side what vertues and graces are most needfull for them and wherein they faile most and accordingly they must order and frame their last words Note for a patterne herein Isaaks counsell to Iaakob when he sent him to Laban and thought he should neuer see him againe and Dauids to his sonne Solomon §. 59. Of Parents last blessing to their children II. Concerning the prayers of parents for their children I noted it before to be a generall dutie neuer to be omitted yet here in particular I mention it againe because a parents blessing consisteth therein especially and then is the most proper time for parents to bestow a blessing on their children as Isaak Iaakob Dauid and others did Let parents therefore as they commend their owne soules into Gods hand so commend their children vnto Gods grace and blessing Gods prouidence is a good inheritance many children doe thereby exceedingly prosper though they haue but small outward meanes whereas others that haue great meanes vsed for their good come to ruine Gods curse following them Now no such meanes can be thought of to procure Gods blessing or to with-hold his curse as the faithfull prayers of parents for their children especially when parents are leauing their children and going to God §. 60. Of parents care to commend their children to some faithfull friends III. The third generall point of making choise of some faithfull friends to commend their children vnto is especially in behalfe of such as are not of sufficient age and discretion to looke to themselues or to those weightie affaires which belong vnto them The friends which in this case are made choise of ought to be such as the parents themselues by good experience haue found to be honest wise faithfull and louing to them and theirs whom parents are to set in their owne place for the good of their children This meanes did Dauid vse when he was old in the behalfe of his sonne Solomon Many children haue found much helpe thereby Such may make a good supply of the departure of parents These are so much the more needfull by how much the more vnstable and vnbridled youth is and by how much the lesse able children are to helpe and guide themselues §. 61. Of parents neglect of their children for the time to come Contrary to a parents prouidence for the good of his children after his departure is the carelesnesse of parents for the time to come They thinke the world is gone with them when they are gone and therefore they will take no thought for the future times that shall be after them as if it were enough for euery one to looke to his owne time There may seeme to be more selfe-loue in such parents then loue of their children in that their care determineth with their owne time and extendeth not it selfe to the time and continuance of their children Hence is it that not a word of direction and exhortation commeth out of their mouths to their children when they are departing no blessing that they will leaue behinde them no friends shall be deputed by them to be as parents to their children Let God prouide say they But where there is a referring of
matters to Gods prouidence without the vse of those meanes which God hath warranted and commended by his word there can be little hope that God should take care of that which is so commended to him Such men doe not in faith depend vpon Gods prouidence but make the very name thereof a pretext to cast off that care which God as a bounden dutie requireth of them As there is little loue of their children in such parents so there is lesse zeale of Gods glory for a parents care of his childrens welfare especially of their continuing to feare and serue the Lord after their owne departure out of this world is an especiall meanes of preseruing Gods feare in the world and propagating it from age to age so as this neglect is a greater fault then many are aware of §. 62. Of parents making a Will before they die The two particular things to be obserued by parents for manifestation of their prouident care ouer their children for the time to come euen after their departure especially in regard of their temporall estate are these 1. That they make a will 2. That they leaue their estates to their children 1. It hath beene an ancient commendable practise both among Gods people and others also that haue beene guided with common ciuilitie when they who haue any estate waxe old or sicke and haue any occasion of expecting death offered vnto them to make their last Will and testament This is set forth in the old Testament vnder this phrase Put thy house in order A dutie it is expresly commanded by God and that not without good reason For 1. A parents Will is an especiall meanes to settle peace among children after his departure and to make them content with that allowance which he hath set out vnto them because by the Will they know it was their fathers pleasure they should haue such and such a portion If controuersies should arise yet a Will is a meanes for the law speedily to determine the same without any tedious and chargeable suits for the Apostle taketh it for a ruled case that no man disanulleth or addeth any thing to a mans ' testament 2. After a parent hath made his Will he may the more quietly settle himselfe for heauenly contemplations and preparations to death and thinke of such good instructions as are most fit to giue as his farewell to his children and the more willingly expect the moment of his dissolution and the more patiently submit himselfe to the very stroke of death In performing this dutie a man must both obserue a fit time and also take good aduice The fit time is while his vnderstanding is good and his memorie perfect so as he may call to minde his debts what he oweth and what is owing to him as also what goods he hath to bestow and with discretion and wisdome order his estate And because through the cauils which many vnconscionable lawyers and others are like to make his true meaning may be peruerted it is meet to haue the aduice of such as can in distinct words and phrases so expresse his meaning as they shall be free from exception Matters of weight are wisely to be managed §. 63. Of neglecting to make a Will Contrary is the daily practise of too many parents who are not willing to make any will at all or else on vaine hope that they may liue longer and when they are sicke vpon conceit that they may recouer or at least longer continue to enioy the vse of their vnderstanding and memory put off the making of their Will till it be too late and so die without Will or make such a Will as ministreth more matter of sute then if they had no Will at all either because doubt is made whether he that made it had his vnderstanding and memory or no or because his Will is so abrupt and ambiguous as his meaning cannot be knowne The mischiefes that follow these neglects are many As 1. Discredit to the partie deceased 2. Contentions among his suruiuing children 3. Wasting a great part if not his whole estate in suits of law 4. Defeating many creditors of their due debt The reason which maketh many to put off the making of their Will is a foolish conceit that if a mans Will be once made then he must needs die out of hand But what ground haue men for any such conceit If sicknes grow vpon a man so long as his Will is vnmade his minde is vnsetled his minde being vnsetled the physicke that is ministred to him cannot so kindly worke so as his death may be the more hastened for not making a Will Besides if his speech faile before his vnderstanding the thought that then he shall die without a Will may so perplex him as his departure will be very vnquiet and troublesome §. 64. Of parents leauing their estate to their children when they die It was before shewed that parents were to lay vp a portion for their children against their entrance into a calling and mariage There is a further duty required when they are going out of the world namely that they leaue their whole estate to their children Where I say whole I exempt not workes of charity nor payment of debts which is a point of iustice but I include more then is giuen as portions or stockes in their life time That estate especially which parents haue receiued from their progenitors are they most bound to leaue vnto their children It is expresly recorded that Abraham gaue all that he had to Isaak Gods law did prouide for this among the Iewes for a man might not sell his land to cut it off from his posterity This was it that made Naboth refuse to sell his vineyard to Ahab as his answer implieth God forbid that I should giue the inheritance of my fathers vnto thee because it was the inheritance of his fathers that is he had receiued it from them he thought it vnlawfull to depriue his children of it This phrase if children then heires taketh it for a granted truth that children haue a right to their parents estate and if they haue a right thereto they may not be defeated thereof God giueth wealth vnto parents but for their life time in which time they are but as Guardians vnto Gods children and are accountable to God so as they haue not an absolute power to doe with it what they will but according to the directions of the great Lord and Master they must vse it reserue it and leaue it For this end parents must order their manner of liuing according to that portion which the Lord hath appointed vnto them and by his prouidence bestowed vpon them they must as it is said in the prouerbe cut their coat according to their cloth Of the two it is much better for parents to liue vnder then aboue their meanes Prouided that they neglect no duty of charitie or iustice
nor through miserablenesse and niggardlinesse carry themselues vnbeseeming the place wherein God hath set them and estate which he hath bestowed vpon them He that liueth somewhat vnder his meanes hath opportunitie to lay vp portions for other children if he haue many and to reserue his inheritance intire to his eldest beside many other good workes of charity as God shall offer occasion which he that liueth aboue his meanes cannot doe §. 65. Of the inconueniences which improuident parents bring their children vnto after their death Contrary to this branch of a parents prouidence are many courses of improuident parents For 1. Some parents lauish and bezell out all their estate in their owne life time making it to determine in their persons Vnworthy they are to receiue any inheritance from ancestors Their fault is double 1. In spending prodigally aboue their estate 2. In wronging their children and depriuing them of their right for particular persons succeding one another are but as diuers linkes of a continued family which are by Gods prouidence added one to another this chaine is not to be broken at any mans pleasure but for the preseruation thereof that which hath beene receiued of the predecessors must be left to the successors 2. Others leaue their estate to their children but so incumbred with debts bonds recognizances and statutes as their children were better be without it then haue it For the hauing it maketh them liue at an answerable rate and bringeth many burdens vpon them besides the debts wherein they stand obliged make them as seruants to their creditors and in time they must be forced to sell all or as captiues lie in prison 3. Others though they deale not so hardly with their children yet they deale too hardly by peeling and polling their inheritance as much as they can they wil not forbeare to make any present gaine that they can though it tend neuer so much to the preiudice and dammage of their children after them as they who cut downe all the timber and wood that they can and take out all the heart of their land 4. Among these may be reckoned such parents as by meere negligence suffer things to goe to decay for want of timely reparations whereby it commeth to passe that such dammages as in the parents time might haue beene preuented with laying out a few shillings cannot be renewed with many pounds 5. Such also as care not in their life time to cleere the titles of those things which they leaue to their children but leaue all things so vnsetled and litigious as it oft costs children more in suit of law to maintaine the inheritance which their parents leaue them then the inheritance is worth and yet after all their paines and cost lose the inheritance too whereas the parent that knew more then the childe can might with small paines and charge haue well setled and cleered all These are mischiefes that many children haue beene brought into by the improuidence of their parents which are the rather to be made knowne that such as come after may proue the more prouident for their children §. 66. Of parents impartiall respect to all their children Hitherto of parents duties The persons to whom those duties are to be performed are distinctly to be considered The parties to whom parents are to performe all the forenamed duties are expressed vnder this word Children which hath not any speciall respect to prioritie of birth to constitution of body to affection of parent or any such thing as if first borne proper beautifull darling or the like children were only meant but all that are begotten and borne of parents all their children are meant Whence I obserue that Parents ought to haue an impartiall respect to all their children and performe dutie indifferently and equally to all We haue for proofe hereof Gods patterne who accounteth all his children deare or beloued children The Greeke word translated deare is very emphaticall it is properly attributed to an only childe the seuentie that translated the Hebrew Bible into Greeke doe with this word interpret that phrase Only Sonne for where in Hebrew it is thus said to Abraham take thy sonne thine only one they thus translate it take thy sonne thy deare one or thy beloued one Other Greeke authors doe so attribute the same word to an only childe yea also and to an only eie as when a man hath but one eie they call it a beloued eie This word then sheweth that God so respecteth all his children as if all were but one all a first-borne all a darling childe So rare a vertue this impartiall respect is rare in the excellencie of it rare also in the scarcitie of it as thorowout the Scripture I can scarce finde a perfect patterne thereof among the sonnes of men Many may be giuen of the contrary as we shall after heare But the more rare it is the more we must labour after it that so we may resemble Gods fatherhood 1. All our children come from our owne substance and bowels Why then should we respect one childe aboue another more then we doe one eie or one eare aboue another We are as tender ouer one as ouer another though it may be we haue more vse of one then of another 2. All our children are alike committed to vs by God the same precepts and directions giuen for all alike the like account to be giuen for all If a King should commit many of his children to one nurse would not he be offended and that iustly if she should put such a difference betwixt them through a foolish partialitie as to respect some and neglect others §. 67. Of parents preferring a dutifull childe before a disobedient childe Obiect What if one childe be more pious to God and parent another more rebellious may not a parent respect that more then this 1. Answ He may take notice of their different carriage and accordingly reward the one and punish the other and yet carrie an equall desire of doing good to both of them alike for the punishing of the rebellious childe is a parents dutie an euidence of loue and a meanes of doing him good 2. Answ It is no partialitie to like grace and goodnesse in a childe and for grace and goodnesse sake to loue his childe so much the more as also for impietie and obstinacy in rebellion to haue his heart the more alienated from his childe this is rather a vertue in a parent Partialitie is when on by and vndue respects one childe is preferred before another §. 68. Of the prerogatiue of the first-borne sonne Quest May not a parent preferre his first-borne childe and heire before his other children Answ We must put difference betwixt a fathers disposing his estate vpon his children and the ordering of his affection towards them A parents affection and care of good education and desire of true good and faithfull praiers to God may be as great towards his younger
children as towards his eldest sonne and heire and yet may he bestow the greatest patrimony vpon the heire which is no partialitie 2. Quest Is it then iust and equall that the eldest sonne should haue a greater patrimony then any of the rest Answ It is most iust and equall For 1. God hath so appointed it yea he made this to be one of the prerogatiues of the first-borne to haue a double portion Vpon this ground Ioseph who was the first-borne of the true wife had a double portion and as a testimony thereof his posteritie made two tribes 2. The lawes of all nations doe order as much 3. Our law giueth the whole inheritance of freeholds to the eldest sonne in which respect it is due vnto him For in ciuill and temporall matters this rule is true we liue by law I take it to be a matter of conscience for a parent to leaue that to euery childe which by law is due to him Neither is it without good reason that the law ordaineth that a parents whole estate of freehold land should descend for 1. There is an excellency in the first borne as is euident by Iaakobs speech to his eldest sonne thou art my first borne my might and the beginning of my strength the excellency of dignity and the excellency of power And thereupon God tooke the first borne as peculiar to himselfe 2. Houses and families by this meanes are vpheld and continued from age to age How needfull it is for the establishment of a commonwealth that families should thus be continued is euident both by experience to all such as haue but halfe an eie to see wherein the stability of a common wealth consisteth and also by the many lawes which God ordained among the Iewes for this purpose as 1. That no land should be quite cut off from a family 2. That if any through pouerty were forced to sell his land the next of kin was to buy it 3. That if a man that had sold his land could by no meanes redeeme it againe at the yeere of Iubilee he was to haue the possession of it againe 4. That if daughters were heires they should not marry out of their fathers tribe and this reason is giuen that euery man may enioy the inheritance of his fathers Obiect By leauing the whole inheritance to the eldest he may be made a Gentleman and all the other beggars Answ In this respect parents ought to be so much the more prouident for their other children in training them vp to callings or laying vp portions or setling other estates vpon them beside the maine inheritance or in taking order that compâ—ent portions be raised out of the inheritance of the eldest son â—n case God take them away before they haue otherwise proâ—ided for their children Out of this answer may a third reason be gathered to shew that it is a behouefull law for the commonwealth that the heire should haue all the land For this law maketh parents more carefull in training vp their younger sonnes to sundry callings which are profitable to a commonwealth If euery childe should haue a part of his fathers lands they would all so depend thereupon as none of them would exercise themselues to such callings as are meanes of mens maintenance §. 69. Of parents partiality towards some children Contrary to the forenamed duty of a parents equall respect to all his children is partiality in fathers and mothers manifested sundry waies For 1. Many parents haue their darling children to whom so much affection is shewed as in comparison none is shewed to others When some are hugged in the bosome others are neglected as if they were none of their owne but basely borne The vnnaturalnesse of the eagle is noted in this kinde that she flaps and driues out of the nest one of her young ones and feedeth only the other as her owne From such partiality in parents proceed many mischiefes as these 1. They giue occasion to such as obserue it to suspect that those children who are so little respected are none of their owne 2. They cause enuy malice and much contention to arise among children When Iosephs brethren saw that their father loued him more then all them they hated him and could not speake peaceably vnto him 3. They prouoke God to inflict some iudgement on those children that are so cockered and preferred before the rest that so they may the better see their folly This sinne of parents partiality is so much the greater when vpon outward respects they preferre the wicked and vngodly children before pious and gracious children Isaak herein much failed for he loued Esau a profane wretch because he did eat of his Venison 2. Other parents so set themselues to raise their house as aâ— their care is to aduance their eldest sonne by education by liberall allowance and by leauing all they haue to him and iâ— the meane while neglect their younger children Though as was noted before the maine inheritance may iustly without shew of partiality be left to the heire yet to be carefull only for him and to neglect the other sauoureth ranke of partiality It is most agreeable to naturall reason that as life is giuen to all children so meanes of maintaining life should be giuen to all 3. In the number of partiall parents may they be reckoned who vniustly disinherit their first borne For the inheritance of right belonging to them and they not deseruing to be disinherited assuredly it is some by respect or other which maketh parents prefer the younger before the elder and this is plaine partiality This kinde of partiality is commonly in such parents as haue had children by seuerall wiues Sometimes dislike of a former wife maketh a father dislike the children he hath by her and through dislike to disinherit the heire by her God gaue the Iewes an expresse law against this kinde of partiality Sometimes againe a gripulous seeking of aduantage to themselues maketh parents to disinherit the right heire as when a man after he hath buried the mother of his first borne hearing of another woman which is of great wealth maketh sute for her She refuseth because he hath an heire of a former wife He to remoue that blocke entereth couenant to make the sonne which he hath by her if he haue any his heire hereupon the mariage is consummate his second wife bringeth forth a sonne he for his couenant sake disinheriteth the first heire An vniust and vnlawfull practise §. 70. Of the causes for which the first-borne may be disinherited Quest May not then a first-borne sonne be disinherited Answ Yes The Scripture noteth two causes wherein the first-borne may be put from the inheritance 1. If he be illegitimate for such an one hath no good title The sonne of the bondwoman shall not be heire with my sonne saith Sarah and that iustly To like purpose say the sons of Gileads
wife to Iephthah Thou shalt not inherit in our fathers house for thou art the sonne of a strange woman Iust was that blame which Iotham laid vpon the men of Shechem for making Abimelech the base sonne of Ierubbaal King and iust was Gods vengeance vpon them for that wrong done to Ierubbaals legitimate children 2. If he be notoriously wicked Thus Ruben for committing abominable incest lost his birthright Many particular crimes are reckoned vp by the ciuill Lawyers which would be too long here to recite §. 71. Of the dutie of fathers and mothers in law The extent of this title Fathers is in the last place to be considered Not only naturall parents themselues but also all that are in their place are comprised vnder it As they who are in the place of parents 1. By the bond of mariage 2. By propinquity of bloud 3. By voluntary appointment The first sort are fathers and mothers in law who are so reckoned either by the mariage of parents themselues or by the mariage of their children That man or woman which is maried to a parent that had children before their mariage is in the place of a naturall parent thus Ioseph was a father to Iesus and Keturah a mother to Isaak So againe the naturall parents of that sonne that hath maried a wife or of that daughter that is maried to an husband are in the place of parents to the wife of their sonne and to the husband of their daughter Thus Iethro was a father to Moses and Naomi a mother to Ruth All these are to account their children in law that is the children of their husband and wife or the wiues of their sons and the husbands of their daughters as their owne naturall children and according to the age and place of these children to performe the forenamed duties and euery way to seeke their good except in such duties as after a peculiar manner belong to naturall parents as nursing to a naturall mother leauing the inheritance to a naturall parent For a patterne hereof take the forenamed examples of Ioseph and Naomi What naturall parents could doe more for their owne children then Ioseph did for Iesus and Naomi for Ruth The history noteth how Ioseph tooke care to haue his wiues childe circumcised and presented in the temple how he fled from place to place to preserue the childs life how perplexed he was when he thought the childe was lost how he trained him vp in his owne house The history also noteth how Naomi brought Ruth her sonnes wife into her own countrey and retained her with her selfe and directed her whither to goe and what husband to haue and became a nurse to her childe 1. Mariage maketh man and wife one flesh in which respect they ought to haue one minde and the same affections as mutually each to other so ioyntly to the children of each other On which ground also the husband and wife of a childe being one flesh with the childe ought as the childe to be respected On this ground God counteth the Saints his deare children because they are espoused to his naturall son 2. To respect the children of an husband or wife as their owne is a great euidence of intire loue to the husband and wife And to respect the husband and wife of a childe is a great euidence of loue to the childe it selfe If the worlds prouerbe hold true loue me and loue my dog how much more true is this Christian rule loue me and loue my childe or loue me and loue mine husband or loue me and loue my wife 3. This also is an especiall meanes to kindle and preserue mutuall loue betwixt man and wife who haue children of former husbands and wiues as also betwixt parents and children §. 72. Of the peruerse cariage of fathers and mothers in law to their children Contrary is the cariage of most fathers and mothers in law especially of those who are maried to husbands or to wiues that had children before mariage so farre they are from performing the forenamed duty as rather they enuy at the prosperity of their husbands and wiues children and secretly endeuour to hinder it in what they can and cunningly leeke to alienate the naturall parents affection from them whence fearefull tragedies haue beene made and lamentable mischiefes haue followed What other reason can be giuen hereof but a plaine instigation of the deuill who thus laboureth to disunite those whom God hath ioyned together For auoiding this snare note the mischiefes that follow from thence 1. Such parents sinne against Gods ordinance and as Eue leane more to Satans suggestion then to Gods direction 2. They alienate the hearts and affections of one from another not only from their children but from themselues 3. They prouoke their children in law to contemne and despise them and to yeeld no duty vnto them Hence note into what an hell vnkinde fathers and mothers in law doe cast themselues If this were duly weighed I thinke they would be otherwise minded But the god of this world doth so blinde their eies with selfe-loue and with enuy that they cannot see the mischiefes whereinto they implunge themselues This is a point the more to be weighed because the fault here taxed is so common and hath in all ages beene too common What grieuous complaints haue in former times beene made and still are made by children against fathers and mothers in law Whence also direfull imprecations haue followed Let widowers and widowes that haue children seriously thinke of it before hand and be the more circumspect in taking a second or third husband or wife and after they are maried let them take heed of Satans snares and let conscience of dutie more preuaile with them then corruption of nature §. 73. Of the faults of parents to their childrens husbands and wiues Many parents to the husbands and wiues of their children doe also much transgresse and swarue from their dutie for 1. They will shew much more respect to their owne children then to the children of their husbands or wiues as by comming to their daughters when their husbands are abroad and neuer but then and sending for their sonnes to their house but not for their wiues 2. In all differences they will take part with their owne children though it be in the worse part and shew great partiality 3. They will oft giue very ill counsell aduising their sons to keepe their wiues short aduising their daughters not to be too subiect to their husbands yea priuily to purloine from their husbands 4. If they liue with their children they will so prie into euery thing that their childrens husband or wife doth and shew such suspicion and iealously in euery thing as they cannot but cause much discord and hence it oft commeth to passe that either parent and childe or husband and wife must be parted
they cannot all in peace liue together These faults I thus note that they may the more carefully be auoided §. 74. Of their dutie who are in stead of parents to Orphants The next sort of those who are in stead of parents are those who in bloud and kindred are next to parents as grandfathers grand-mothers vncles aunts elder brothers or sisters their husbands or wiues and cosins These commonly are counted to be in the place of parents when God taketh away naturall and immediate parents from their children so as they are parents to Orphants The duties which were prescribed to naturall parents appertaine to them except before excepted Their dutie is to see these Orphants well educated well placed in some good calling well maried and if the Orphants be left destitute of meanes well prouided for Mordecai is a worthy president and patterne for this kinde of parents He brought vp Esther his vncles daughter for she had neither father nor mother he tooke her for his owne daughter when she was taken from him he went to know how she did and what should become of her and he gaue her aduice from time to time how to carrie her selfe Let such as are parents to Orphants take this example as a direction and as a motiue to performe the other duties prescribed to naturall parents as need requireth and occasion is offered God by his prouidence taking away naturall parents committeth their Orphants as a charge to the next of kin that as their naturall parents brought them forth these should bring them vp therefore for their recompence let them looke to God who taketh vpon himselfe to be a father of the fatherlesse and for their incouragement remember the reward which Mordecai receiued of the Lord yea also let them remember the blessing that God bestowed vpon Esther God doth oft so blesse the meanes vsed for the education of Orphants as they who take the care thereof haue no cause to repent their paines and cost but rather haue much matter of comfort ioy and thanksgiuing §. 75. Of the common neglect of Orphants Too too common is the contrary disposition of most kinsmen and kinswomen they thinke they are bound to none but their owne children and if they haue no children to none at all Many are of Ruths kinsmans minde they feare to marre their owne inheritance Though they be themselues exceeding rich and spend much in apparell pastimes and house-keeping yet they can suffer the Orphants of their poore kindred to want and to beg for need This is it that maketh the losse of naturall parents to be so much the greater And herein many Christians are more inhumane then the heathen which the Apostle implieth where he faith they are worse then infidels for Orphants next of kinne are to be reckoned among those whom the Apostle termeth a mans OVVNE §. 76. Of the dutie of Guardians The last sort of those who are in place of parents are such as haue the charge of children committed to them by voluntary appointment of parents or are chosen by children themselues or by the magistrate when parents are dead or lunatike or any other way impotent and vnable to traine vp their owne children Of these care and conscience is rather required then cost and charges for commonly both their charges are allowed and their paines recompenced They who by reason of the death or impotency of naturall parents haue the charge of children committed to them are commonly called Guardians of whom two generall duties are required 1. That they looke to their Pupils good education 2. That they preserue their patrimony and inheritance For their education the directions giuen before to naturall parents are to be obserued by them For preseruation of their patrimonie they must doe for their Pupils what they would doe for their owne children and so carry themselues as with good conscience they may giue that account to their Pupils or any other which the law requireth The two forenamed duties are the rhaine ends for which Guardians are chosen in performing whereof if they be faithfull great redresse will be made of the vntimely death of parents and notwithstanding parents die before their children be of discretion to manage their estate yet will their houses and families be maintained and young heires kept from cunnie-catchers and cheaters It is noted of Iohn who had the mother of Iesus commended to him that he tooke her to his owne home whereby is implied his prouident care for her good §. 77. Of the fraud of Guardians Contrary is the practise of most Guardians who take Pupils for their owne aduantage and make a prey of them The heathen could say that Guardianship is to be performed for the benefit of the Pupill and not of the Guardian Yet among Christians is the forenamed fault of Guardians 1. There are few children that haue not naturall parents to looke to their good education but are exceedingly neglected therein and brought vp very rudely and licentiously yea many times too sparingly and â—iggardly for diet apparell and other needfull things though they haue sufficient to discharge all that shall be laid out vpon them 2. The maine estate patrimonie of many Pupils is much impaired and if they haue lands as much waste is made vpon them as possibly can be and when a reckoning is to be giuen it shall be a large vniust and most vnconscionable reckoning of the Guardian can but get a generall release it is all that the caueth for 3. Mariages are after a for forced vpon many Pupils and such matches put vpon them as they cannot like yea such as are no way fit for them neither for estate nor yeeres nor proportion of bodie nor qualities of minde Little doe these Guardians thinke of that account where unto they shall be brought an other day before the Lord who stileth himselfe the helper of the fatherlesse and who beholdeth mischiefe to requite it Fearefull is that iudgement which the Lord hath threatned against those that oppresse the fatherlesse Let not therefore vniust Guardians thinke that the gaine they get wrongfully from their Pupils shall prosper but rather let them looke for Gods curse vpon their owne children and goods If such as parents themselues haue vpon their death-beds committed their children vnto in confidence of their faithfulnesse shall deale deceitfully with their Pupils their sinne is doubled and trebled For 1. They violate the bond of friendship faithfulnesse and trust reposed vpon them 2. They sinne directly against iustice 3. Most monstrously they transgresse the rules of charitie §. 78. Of the dutie of Schoolemasters and Tutors Among those who are by voluntarie appointment set in the place of parents are Schoolemasters and Tutors to be reckoned The authoritie and charge of a parent is for a time committed to them therefore for that time they ought to performe a parents dutie Their dutie is appropriated to education it appertaineth not to
5. 23 24. n Eph. 4 8. o Ioh. 14. 3. p Reu. 22. 17 20. 1. Vse An high fauour to be the spouse to Christ 1 Sam. 25. 41. Luk. 15. 19. Mar. 1. 7. * §. 33 34. 2. Vse Direction How Christs spouse must cary her selfe Est 1. 16. c. 3. Vse Triall Who are Christs spouse * §. 24. 4. Vse Consolation The priuiledges of Christs spouse Ecclesia omnem sponsi potestatem tenet Aug. contr Don. l. 4. c. 1. Ioh. 1. 18. Prou. 8. 30. Ephes 4. 9. Ioh. 16. 28. Mark 3. 33 34. Vse Imitation All to be forsaken for Christ Psal 45. 10. Matth. 10. 37. Luke 14. 26. expounded How parents to be hated for Christ Deut. 33. 9. Gen. 41. 4. Matth. 19. 27. Hosea 2. 19. Isa. 61. 8. 54. 10. Reason Ioh. 13. 1. Rom. 11. 29. Mal. 2. 16. Ier. 3. 1. Vse Cleaue to Christ d Deut. 10. 20. 13. 4. Acts 11. 23. 1 Sam. 18. 1. Rom. 8. 35. c. All the Saints made one Spouse 1 Cor. 12. 13. See §. 22. Gal. 3. 28. Reason Vse Christus nihil aliud deputat corpus suum i. Ecclesiam quam seipsum quia de Christo ecclesia verius intelligitur Erunt duo in carne una Aug. de pec mer. lib. 1. cap. 31. * See §. 70. * §. 84. 1 Cor. 6. 17. 12. 12. Heb. 10. 27. Heb. 12. 15. Eph. 4. 27. Of a mysterie see more in the whole armour of God Treat 3. §. 168. on Eph. 6. 19. 1. Vse The mysterie of our vnion with Christ not to be measured with the last of our reason 2. Use No carnall thing in our vnion with Christ Ecclesia Christo in occulto vxor est Occultè quippe atque intus in abscondito secreto spiritali anima humana inhaeret verbo Dei vt sint duo in carne vna Aug. contr Faust Man lib. 22. cap. 38. 3. Use Papists make our vnion with Christ a carnall matter Joh 6. 52. Ioh. 3. 4. Multos adulteros video qui sponsam tanto pretio emptam possidere volunt id agunt vt pro sponso amentur Aug. in Ioh. Tract 12. Uide Bern. ep 237. ad Eugen. * See §. 17. 2 Cor. 11 2. Quod est in Christo in Ecclesia magnum hoc in singulis quibusque viris vxoribus minimum Aug. de nupt concup lib. 1. cap. 21. * Alphons à Castro contr haer lib. 3. Petrus à Soto de Matr. lect 2. Concil Trident. Sess 24. Can. 1. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Reu. 2. 7. x Luk. 8. 8. Mar. 13. 37. Eph. 5. 14. Rom. 11. 20. Reason The life of Gods word in application 1 Cor. 14 9. Vnum duntaxat tibi considerandum est quo pacto te praestes innoxium Chrys hom 26. in 1 Cor. 11. Reasons Act. 20. 35. Rom. 14. 12. Ezec. 18. 5. c. Luk. 17. 34. Vse Non quae alijs data sunt praecepta quaerimus quando alicuius criminis ac cusamur Chrys loc citat * §. 10. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Who are to be accounted children who parents * Treat 5. §. 56 57 c. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 All duties of children comprised vnder obedience 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 * Chap. 5. vers 22. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Why the morall law is alleaged A genere ad speciem Honour compriseth all childrens duties Why both father and mother expressed How the fift commandement is the first with promise 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Rom. 13 8. Difference betwixt the promise in the second and fist commandement First simply taken Exod. 13. 2. Matth. 1. 25. Isa 38. 2 3. 1. Vse 2. Vse 3. Vse 4. Vse Cautions in seeking our owne good Cic. lib. 2. de Offic. Paradox 1. Vse Nihil bonum Scriptura nisi quod honestum asserit Ambr. Offic. lib. 2. cap. 3. b Exod. 20. 12. c Deut. 5. 16. Longlife and prosperitie ioyned together Deut. 5. 16. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Temporall prosperitie promised 1 Tim. 4. 8. Deut. 5. 16. Prosperitie a good thing Leuit. 26. 4. c. Deut. 28. 1. c. Gen. 28. 20. 32. 10 11. Leuit. 26. 15. c. Deut. 28. 16. c. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Psal 73. 13. Ier. 12. 1. Hab. 1. 3. How prosperitie proues a curse to the wicked Matth. 5. 45. Rom. 2. 4. Ose 13. 11. 1 Tim. 6. 9. Gen. 40. 19. Rom. 8. 28. Complaints of Saints impeach not their well being b Iob. 9. 3. 2 Cor. 12. 9. c Epb. 3. 1. d Psal 119. 67 e Iob 1. 12. f Ose 5. 15. g 2 Cor. 5. 2. Long life a blessing Psal 6. 5. Isa 38. 18. Phil. 1. 24. Iob. 32. 7. Iob. 9. 4. Gal. 6. 10. Gen. 15. 16. Rom. 2. 5. m 1 King 14. 13. n 1 King 13. 14. Isa 17. 1. o 1 Cor. 11. 32. p Gen. 5. 24. Heb. 11. 5. Deut. 6. 2. Psal 34. 12 13 14. Rut. 3. 1. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 How disobedient children hinder their welfare and shorten their daies Deut. 21. 21. Judg. 9. 5 6. a 1 Sam. 2. 34. b 2 Sam. 18. 14. c 1 King 2. 25. How fitly prosperity and long life are ioyned together God makes his sauours true blessings Gen. 17. 19. Isa 38. 5 6. 39. 8. 2 Sam. 7. 9. c. 1. Vse 2. Vse 3. Vse Psal 37 37 38. Eccl. 8. 12 13. Isa 3. 10 11. 4. Use Prou. 22. 6. Doctr. Substance of promises made to the Iewes still remaineth Heb. 13. 5. Act. 2. 39. Vse Rom. 15. 4. Rom 4. 23. 1 Cor. 10. 11. Hinc patescit humanae vitae terminum non esse decreto simplici absoluto constitutum c. Zach. Muthel in hunc loc N. Heming alijque Mans time set Iob 7. 1. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Iob 14. 14. Iob 14. 5. Eccles 2. 3. Iob. 7. 30. Isa 38. 5. Mat. 10. 30. 6 27. Stat sua cuique dies c. Virg. Aenied 10. Vses to be made of the determined time of mans life Dan. 3. 17 18. Iob. 9. 4. Against merit * Whole armour of God Treat 2. Part. 4. §. 7. on Ephes 6. 14. 1. Obseru Parents bound to duties How parents duties are implied in the 5. Commandement 1. Vse Ministers must prouoke parents to their dutie 2. Use 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Vers 1. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Occasions of prouoking children to wrath Heb. 12. 10. * See Treat 5. §. 31 41. 2. Obser Ezec. 3. 18. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 3. Obser 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Enutrite Beza Nourrissez Fr. 4. Obseru Parents to prouide all needfull things for children 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 5. Obseru 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 6. Obseru 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Instituere
the Churches iustification 55 37 Of the Churches sanctification 56 38 Of the Churches purity before God and man 56 39 Of the order and dependance of iustification and sanctification one vpon another 58 40 Of Sacramentall washing of water 59 41 How Baptisme is a meanes of cleansing and sanctifying 60 42 Obiections against the efficacie of Baptisme answered 61 43 What kinde of meanes of grace baptisme is 62 44 Of the necessitie of baptisme 62 45 Of the contrarie extremes of Papists and Ana. baptists about the necessity and efficacie of baptisme 63 46 Of the inward washing by baptisme 65 47 Of ioyning the word with baptisme 66 48 Of the inference of glorification vpon instification and sanctification 68 49 Of the fruition of Christs presence in heauen 70 50 Of the glory of the Church in heauen 72 51 Of the Churches freedome from all deformity in heauen 73 52 Of the perfect puritie of the Church in heauen 74 53 Of the application of the things which Christ hath done for the the Church vnto husbands 75 54 Of the application of the loue which a man beareth to himselfe vnto an husband 76 55 Of the amplification of a mans loue of himselfe 78 56 Of mans naturall affection to himselfe 79 57 Of naturall selfe-loue 80 58 Of spirituall selfe-loue 82 59 Of euill self-loue 82 60 Of the error of Stoicks in condemning all passion 83 61 Of well vsing naturall affection 83 62 Of mans forbearing to wrong himselfe 84 63 Of vnnaturall practises against ones selfe 85 64 Of haters of others 86 65 Of mans care in prouiding and vsing things needfull for his body 87 66 Of them that neglect to cherish their bodies 88 67 Of contentment in that which is sufficient 89 68 Of Christs forbearing to hate the Church 90 69 Of Christs nourishing and cherishing his Church 91 70 Of the vnion betwixt Christ and the Saints 93 71 Of the priuiledges appertaining to the Saints euen in this life by reason of their vnion with Christ 98 72 Of the priuiledge of our vnion with Christ in the time of death 102 73 Of the priuiledge of our vnion with Christ after death 103 74 Of the duties which are required of the Saints by vertue of their vnion with Christ 104 75 Of their regeneration who are members of Christ 105 76 Of the author of our regeneration Christ 106 77 Of the matter of our regeneration Christ 108 78 Of the excellency of regeneration 109 79 Of the ancient law of mariage 110 80 Of preferring husband or wife before parents 112 81 Of the firmnesse of the matrimoniall bond 114. 82 Of two only to be ioyned together in mariage 114 83 Of polygamy and bigamy 115 84 Of the neere coniunction of man and wife together 115 85 Of the matrimoniall coniunction of Christ and the Church 117 86 Of Christs leauing his father and mother for his spouse 120 87 Of the indissoluble vnion betwixt Christ and the Church 121 88 Of the equall priuiledge of all the Saints 122 89 Of the neere vnion betwixt Christ and the Church 123 90 Of the mysterie of the vnion of Christ and the Church 124 91 Of the Popes vsurping to be spouse of the Church 125 92 Of the false sacrament of mariage 126 93 Of the summe of husbands and wiues duties 128 94 Of applying the word to our selues 129 95 Of euery ones looking to his owne duties especially 130 96 Of the meaning of the first verse of the sixt chapter 132 97 Of the meaning of the second verse 134 98 Of aiming at our owne in seeking the good of others 137 99 Of preferring honestie before commoditie 138 100 Of the meaning of the third verse 139 101 Of prosperity how far forth it may be a blessing 140 102 Of prosperity bestowed on the wicked how it proues a curse 141 103 How both hauing and wanting prosperity is a blessing to the Saints 142 104 Of long-life how farre forth it is a blessing 143 105 Of long life prouing a curse to the wicked 144 106 Of limiting the promises of temporall blessings 144 107 Of appropriating prosperity and long life to the obedience which children yeeld to their parents 145 108 Of Gods ordering his fauours so as they may appeare to be true blessings 147 109 Of Gods high account of dutifull children 148 110 Of childrens doing good to themselues by honouring their parents 148 111 Of parents doing good to their children by keeping them vnder obedience 149 112 Of the perpetuity of the substance of such things as in their circumstances respecting the Iewes are vanished 150 113 Of the determined period of mans life 151 114 Of reward promised to obedience that it implieth no merit 153 115 Of the connexion of parents dutie with childrens 153 116 Of the extent of these words fathers children 154 117 Of parents prouoking children 155 118 Of parents seeking the good of their children 156 119 Of parents nurturing their children 157 120 Of parents fixing precepts in their childrens mindes 158 121 Of adding information to discipline 158 122 Of parents teaching their children the feare of God 159 123 Of the subiection which beleeuing seruants owe. 159 124 Of the meaning of the fift verse 160 125 Of the meaning of the sixt verse 164 126 Of the meaning of the seuenth verse 168 127 Of the meaning of the eight verse 168 128 Of the connexion of masters duties with seruants 171 129 Of the meaning of this phrase doe the same things 172 130 Of masters forbearing threatning 174 131 Of masters subiection to a greater master 175 132 Of Gods being in heauen 175 133 Of Gods hauing no respect of persons 177 II. TREATISE PART I. Of husband and wife who are so to be accounted § 1. OF those who may seeke to be maried 179 2 Of ripenesse of yeares in them that are to be maried 180 3 Of impotent persons that ought not to seeke after mariage 181 4 Of barrennesse that it hindereth not mariage 182 5 Of that ineuitable danger which hindereth mariage 183 6 Of the lawfulnesse of mariage to all sorts of persons 183 7 Of the things which are absolutely necessary to make a person fit for mariage 185 8 Of the lawfulnesse of other mariages after one of the maried couple is dead 186 9 Of equality in yeares betwixt husband and wife 188 10 Of equality in estate and condition betwixt those that are to be maried together 189 11 Of equality in piety and religion betwixt those that are to be maried together 191 12 Of mariages betwixt persons of diuers professions 192 13 Of that mutuall liking which must passe betwixt mariageable persons before they be maried 196 14 Of a contract what it is 198 15 Of the grounds of a contract 198 16 Of the reasons which shew how requisite a contract is 200 17 Of abusing or neglecting a contract 202 18 Of the distance of time betwixt a contract and mariage 202 19 Of a religious consecrating of mariage
is ready to doe what good he can to another This is common to all Christians a dutie which euen superiours owe to inferiours according to the fore-named extent of this word one another in which respect euen the highest gouernour on earth is called a minister for the good of such as are vnder him Secondly we must put difference betwixt the worke it selfe and the manner of doing it That worke which in it selfe is a worke of superioritie and authoritie in the manner of doing it may be a worke of submission viz. if it be done in humilitie and meeknesse of minde The Magistrate by ruling with meeknesse and humilitie submitteth himselfe to his subiect In this respect the Apostle exhorteth that nothing no not the highest and greatest workes that can be be done in vaine-glory but in meeknesse Thirdly we must distinguish betwixt the seuerall places wherein men are for euen they who are superiours to some are inferiours to others as he that said I haue vnder me and am vnder authoritie The master that hath seruants vnder him may be vnder the authoritie of a Magistrate Yea God hath so disposed euery ones seuerall place as there is not any one but in some respect is vnder another The wife though a mother of children is vnder her husband The husband though head of a family is vnder publike Magistrates Publike Magistrates one vnder another and all vnder the King The King himselfe vnder God and his word deliuered by his Ambassadours whereunto the highest are to submit themselues And Ministers of the word as subiects are vnder their Kings and Gouernours He that saith Let euery soule be subiect to the higher powers excepteth not Ministers of the word and he that saith obey them that haue the ouersight of you and submit your selues excepteth not kings only the difference is in this that the authoritie of the king is in himselfe and in his owne name he may command obedience to be performed to himselfe but the authoritie of a Minister is in Christ and in Christs name only may he require obedience to be performed to Christ The reason why all are bound to submit themselues one to another is because euery one is set in his place by God not so much for himselfe as for the good of others whereupon the Apostle exhorteth that none seeke his owne but euery man anothers wealth Euen Gouernours are aduanced to places of dignitie and authoritie rather for the good of their subiects then for their owne honour Their callings are in truth offices of seruice yea burdens vnder which they must willingly put their shoulders being called of God and of which they are to giue an account concerning the good which they haue done to others for the effecting whereof it is needfull that they submit themselues Let euery one therefore high and low rich and poore superiour and inferiour Magistrate and subiect Minister and people husband and wife parent and childe master and seruant neighbours and fellowes all of all sorts in their seuerall places take notice of their dutie in this point of submission and make conscience to put it in practice Magistrates by procuring the wealth and peace of their people as Mordecai Ministers by making themselues seruants vnto their people not seeking their owne profit but the profit of many that they may be saued as Paul Fathers by well educating their children and taking heed that they prouoke them not to wrath as Dauid Husbands by dwelling with their wiues according to knowledge giuing honour to the wife as to the weaker vessell as Abraham Masters by doing that which is iust and equall to their seruants as the Centurion Euery one by being of like affection one towards another and by seruing one another in loue according to the Apostles rule Let this dutie of submission be first well learned and then all other duties will better be performed Be not high minded nor swell one against another Though in outward estate some may be higher than other yet in Christ all are one whether bond or free all members of one and the same body Now consider the mutuall affection as I may so speake of the members of a naturall body one towards another not any one of them will puffe it selfe vp and rise against the other the head which is the highest and of greatest honour will submit it selfe to the feet in performing the dutie of an head as well as the feet to the head in performing their dutie so all other parts Neither is it hereby implied that they which are in place of dignitie and authoritie should forget or relinquish their place dignitie or authoritie and become as inferiours vnder authoritie no more than the head doth for the head in submitting it selfe doth not goe vpon the ground and beare the body as the feet but it submitteth it selfe by directing and gouerning the other parts and that with all the humilitie meeknesse and gentlenesse that it can So must all superiours much more must equals and inferiours learne with humilitie and meeknesse without scorne or disdaine to performe their dutie this is that which was before by the Apostle expresly mentioned and is here againe intimated none are exempted and priuileged from it We know that it is vnnaturall and vnbeseeming the head to scorne the feet and to swell against them but more than monstrous for one hand to scorn another what shall we then say if the feet swel against the head Surely such scorne and disdaine among the members would cause not only great disturbance but also vtter ruine to the body And can it be otherwise in a politique body But on the contrarie when all of all sorts shall as hath beene before shewed willingly submit themselues one to another the whole body and euery member thereof will reape good thereby yea by this mutuall submission as we doe good so we shall receiue good §. 4. Of the feare of God Hitherto of the exhortation The direction followeth In the feare of the Lord. This clause is added to declare partly the meanes how men may be brought to submit themselues readily one to another and partly the manner how they ought to submit themselues The feare of the Lord is both the efficient cause that moueth a true Christian willingly to performe all dutie to man and also the end whereunto he referreth euery thing that he doth For the better conceiuing whereof I will briefly declare 1. What this feare of the Lord is 2. How the Lord is the proper obiect of it 3. What is the extent thereof 4. Why it is so much vrged First feare of God is an awfull respect of the diuine Maiestie Sometimes it ariseth from faith in the mercy and goodnesse of God for when the heart of man hath once felt a sweet taste of Gods goodnesse and found that in his fauour only all happinesse consisteth it is
appeare by a particular consideration of the three forenamed properties of this matrimoniall bond the preheminencie firmnesse and neerenesse thereof §. 86. Of Christs leauing his Father and mother for his spouse I. The preheminencie of the matrimoniall bond betwixt Christ and the Church herein appeareth that Christ left his Father and his mother for his spouse the Church As Christ is God God is his Father as man the Virgin Marie was his mother Now the leauing of his Father must be taken only by way of resemblance in that he came from the place of his Fathers habitation to the place where his Spouse was The Scripture saith that he was in the bosome of his Father by him as one brought vp with him his daily delight reioycing alway before him yet descended he into the lowest parts of the earth where his spouse was He came out from the Father and came into the world But truly and properly did he preferre his Spouse before his mother For when he was instructing his Spouse and his mother came to interrupt him he said to his mother who is my mother and to his Spouse behold my mother Of the same minde must the Church and all that are of the Church be vnto Christ she must forget her owne people and fathers house Seeing Christ hath gone before vs and giuen vs so good an example what an high point of ingratitude would it be for vs to preferre father mother or any other before Christ our husband Note what he saith in this case He that loueth father or mother more then me is not worthie of me And againe If any come vnto me and hate not his father and mother he cannot be mine To hate here is to be so farre from preferring father mother before Christ as rather then not to loue Christ to hate father and mother Or so intirely to loue Christ aboue all as our loue of parents in comparison thereof to be an hatted Thus Leui said vnto his father and mother I haue not seene him for they obserued the word and kept the couenant of Christ This then is our dutie that we suffer not any naturall affection and dotage on our parents to swallow vp that loue we owe to Christ as Pharaohs ill-fauourèd and leane-fleshed kine eat vp the seuen well-fauoured and fat kine How much lesse should any loue of this world of the profits promotions or pleasures of this world draw away our hearts from Christ should we not rather say and doe as the Apostles did Behold we haue for saken all and followed Christ §. 87. Of the indissoluble vnion betwixt Christ and the Church II. The firmnesse of that bond whereby Christ and the Church are said to be glued together is greater and more inuiolable then that whereby man and wife are ioyned together Death parteth man and wife but death cannot make a diremption betwixt Christ and the Church so as we may well from this metaphor inferre that Christ and the Church are inseparably knit together I will betroth thee vnto me for euer saith Christ vnto the Church The couenant which Christ maketh with his Church is an euerlasting couenant The mountaines shall depart and the hils be remoued before his kindnesse shall depart from the Church The stedfastnesse and vnchangeablenesse of his will is the only cause thereof Whom he loueth he loueth vnto the end His gifts and calling are without repentance He is not like the hard hearted Iewes who vpon euerie sleight occasion would put away their wiues The Lord hateth putting away Though therefore the Church through her weaknesse doe depart from him and play the harlot yet returne againe to me saith the Lord. Learne we by this patterne to cleaue close vnto the Lord which is a dutie most due to Christ who cleaueth so close to vs and therefore oft expressed in the Scripture Three vertues there are which are of speciall vse to this purpose Faith Hope Loue. Faith is the hand whereby we lay fast hold on Christ and as it were knit him to our selues as he by his Spirit knitteth vs to himselfe This maketh vs rest and repose our selues on him for all needfull things and not to leaue him for any thing Hope is the anchor which holdeth vs fast against all the stormes of Satan so as they can neuer driue vs out of our harbour which is the Lord Iesus Christ Loue is the glue and soader which maketh vs one with Christ for it is the propertie of loue to vnite those that loue one another in one Ionathans soule was knit with the soule of Dauid For why Ionathan loued him as his owne soule He that loueth is well pleased with him whom he loueth and seeketh also to please him that they may mutually delight one in another Were these three vertues well rooted in vs we would say who shall separate vs from the loue of Christ shall tribulation or distresse c. §. 88. Of the equall priuiledge of all the Saints III. Concerning the phrase whereby the neerenesse of man and wife is set forth they two shall be one flesh it may be demanded how this can be applied to Christ and the Saints who are more then two Answ Christ by one Spirit knitteth vs all into one bodie and so maketh all ioyntly considered together one Spouse The multitude of Saints doth no more imply many wiues then the multitude of members which the naturall bodie of a wife hath This point then teacheth vs that In the mysticall mariage betwixt Christ and the Church all and euerie of the Saints haue an equall priuiledge Some are not Concubines some wiues nor some more loued or preferred to another but all one wife All are one in Christ Iesus Neither the Father that gaue them all nor the Sonne who tooke them all saw any thing in one more then in another their meere grace moued them to doe what they did Well may euerie one apply all the forenamed priuiledges vnto themselues and not one emulate another This affordeth instruction to the more eminent in the Church that like proud dames they insult not ouer others as if they were their hand-maids and consolation to the meaner sort that they may vphold themselues and possesse their soules with patience and not enuie or grieue at the outward prosperitie and priuiledges of others In the greatest priuiledge they are equall to the greatest This of the parties coupled to Christ For these words they two shew that all the Saints are but one Christ is the other of the two The next words are one flesh shew how neere those Saints are to Christ §. 89. Of the neere vnion betwixt Christ and the Church The maine point here to be noted is that Christ and the Church are most neerely linked together What can be neerer then that two should come into one flesh This is
is set in the first place These words following which is the first commandement with promise are fitly included in a parenthesis because they are not the words of the law but inserted by the Apostle as a reason to inforce the law and so make a fourth reason Quest In what respect is this commandement called the first with promise Answ 1. The * word here vsed by the Apostle properly signifieth an affirmatiue precept as our English word commandement doth Now then of the affirmatiue precepts it is the first with promise 2. The Scripture oft appropriateth the law to the second table as where he saith he that loueth another hath fulfilled the law and so in other places Now this is the first commandement of the second table 3. It is generally true of all the commandements for among the ten it is the first with promise Obiect The second commandement hath a promise annexed to it Answ 1. That which is annexed to the second Commandement is not expresly a promise but rather a declaration of Gods Iustice in taking vengeance of transgressors and of his mercie in rewarding obseruers of the Law yet I denie not but that a promise by consequence is implied but here it is expressed 2. The promise there implied is only a generall promise made to obseruers of the whole Law and therefore he vseth the plurall number Commandements but here is a particular promise made to them that keepe this Commandement in particular 2. Quest Why is it then said the first when no other Commandements with promise follow Answ This particle first hath not alwayes reference to some other following but is oft simply taken to shew that none was before it so is the word first-borne vsed in the Law and so Christ is called the first-borne Sonne of Marie The word promise sheweth that this fourth reason includeth some benefit redounding to those children themselues that honour their parents the benefit is expresly mentioned in the next verse which we will afterwards distinctly consider §. 98. Of aiming at our owne in seeking the good of others Here in generall we may note that It is not vnlawfull to aime at our owne good and benefit in doing the duties which God requireth at our hands to others for that which God himselfe propoundeth and setteth before vs we may seeke and aime at Many like promises there be in Scripture and many approued prayers grounded on those promises whereby the truth of the doctrine is confirmed vnto vs. Hezekiah maketh the good seruice he had done to God and his Church a ground to obtaine longer life so others For God layeth no dutie on any man but therein he aimeth at the good of him who performeth the dutie as well as of him to whom the dutie is performed Whereby he would shew that his Commandements are no strait yokes and heauie burthens but meanes of procuring their good who fulfill them How highly doth this commend the good respect that God beareth to all the sonnes of men seeking their good in euerie place wherein he setteth them either of authoritie or subiection How ought this to stirre vs vp willingly and cheerefully to obserue the Lawes which God commandeth vs and performe the seruices he requireth of vs seeing thereby we procure our owne good How fully may this satisfie and euen stop the mouthes of all such as are discontent with their places and mutter against that subiection which God enioyneth to them What a good direction and resolution may this be to many who being moued in conscience to seeke the good of others doubt whether therein they may aime at their owne good or no To make this case cleare by an instance which may serue in stead of many A Minister faithfull in his place and verie painfull and in that respect of a good conscience but withall of a tender and weake conscience doubteth whether thereby he may seeke maintenance to himselfe fearing that so he seeketh himselfe and not simply the edification of Gods Church But by the forenamed doctrine we see that both may be aimed at for God commandeth the one and promiseth the other As we haue one eye on Gods Commandement for direction so we may haue another on his promise for incouragement Yet because through the corruption of our nature we are too prone to seeke our selues some cautions are in this point carefully to be obserued 1. That we seeke not our owne good by any transgression for it is promised vnto obedience 2. That we doe not so wholly seeke our selues and our owne good as we neglect others for God hauing ioyned both together no man may put them asunder 3. That we aime at our owne good as a reward following vpon the dutie which God commandeth and so be as willing to doe the dutie as desirous of the reward 4. That our owne benefit be not the only no nor the chiefest thing we aime at in doing our dutie but rather come as a motiue to adde an edge and to sharpen other motiues of greater moment And thus much the order which the Apostle obserueth in setting downe his reasons noteth vnto vs for the three former haue respect to God and to that good conscience which children ought to carrie towards him the first pointeth at Gods image which parents carie in the Lord the second setteth forth that right which God hath prescribed to children the third declareth Gods charge this fourth only which is the last hath respect to the profit and benefit of children themselues §. 99. Of preferring honestie before commoditie From the forenamed order we may further gather that Equitie and good conscience ought more to moue vs to doe our dutie then our owne profit and the benefit that thereby redoundeth to vs. If there should come such an opposition betwixt these that they could not both stand togethet but that for doing that which is right and which God hath commanded our prosperitie must be hindred and life shortned we should so stand to that which is right and commanded of God as prosperitie life and all be let goe To this purpose tend all the exhortations in Scripture to forsake goods lands life and euerie thing else for righteousnesse sake So cleare is this point that the Heathen discerned it by the glimpse of that light of nature which they had for they could say that that which is honest and right is to be preferred before that which is commodious and profitable There is no comparison betwixt honestie and commoditie right and profit The one is absolutely necessarie for attaining to eternall saluation the other giueth but a little quiet and contentment in this world nay if profit be without right it can giue no true contentment or quiet at all Vnworthie therefore they are of the name of Christians who so wholly and only aime at their outward profit and prosperitie as they regard not what is right and what God hath
masters haue beene made 4. The law of equitie doth so also One good deserueth another good therefore the Apostle saith to masters giue vnto your seruants that which is iust and equall Now let masters take notice hereof and know that God the great Lord of all hath made this relation betwixt master and seruant and hath set each of them in their seuerall and distinct places for the mutuall good of one another so as seruants are no more for the good of masters then masters are for the good of seruants Wherefore as they looke for dutie let them performe dutie if seruants faile in their dutie let masters see if they themselues be not the cause thereof by failing in theirs Their authoritie will be no excuse before Christ but a meanes to aggrauate their fault and increase their condemnation for the greater the talent is the more diligence is expected and the straiter account shall be exacted §. 129. Of the meaning of this phrase Doe the same things These two titles Masters Seruants are so taken here as they were before in the fift verse All the duties of masters are comprised vnder this phrase doe the same things which at first sight may seeme to be somewhat strange for may some say The things which seruants must doe are these to feare to obey to doe seruice with the like and are masters to doe the same things Answ 1. These words are not to be referred to those particular duties which are proper to seruants but to those generall rules of equitie which are common to masters as well as seruants namely that in their seuerall places with singlenesse of heart as vnto Christ not with eie seruice as men pleasers but as the seruants of Christ they doe the will of God from the heart 2. Those words may be referred to the eight verse the verse going immediatly before which laieth downe a generall rule for all men in their seuerall places to doe the good things of their places Now then as seruants must haue an eie to their places to doe the good things thereof so masters must doe the same things that is they must haue an eie to their places to doe the good things thereof 3. Those words may be taken without reference to any former words and expounded of a mutuall reciprocall and proportionable dutie that ought to passe betwixt master and seruant not in the particulars as if the same duties were to be performed by each of them for that were to ouerthrow the order and degrees which God hath set betwixt master and seruant to crosse Gods ordinance and inferre contradiction but in generall that duties are to be performed of each to other in which respect the Apostle said before of all sorts superiours and inferiours Submit your selues one to another And thus by this phrase the doctrine before mentioned is confirmed that Masters are as well bound to dutie as seruants None of these answers thwart another but all of them may well be admitted and all of them well stand together They all imply a common equitie betwixt masters and seruants but no equalitie mutuall duties but diuers and distinct duties appertaining to their seuerall places Compare with this text that which the Apostle himselfe hath more plainly and fully noted Col. 4. 1. and we shall obserue him to expound his own meaning for that which here he implieth vnder this phrase the same things that he expresseth there vnder these two words iust equall whereof we shall hereafter more distinctly speake Purposely doth the Apostle infold masters duties vnder this generall phrase the same things to preuent a secret obiection raised from the eminency and superioritie of masters aboue seruants which maketh them thinke that seruants are only for the vse of masters and that masters are no way tied to their seruants But if in the generall masters must doe the same things then they are for their seruants good as well as seruants for theirs §. 130. Of masters forbearing threatning The Apostle in these words forbearing threatning doth not simply forbid all manner of threatning but only prescribe a moderation thereof and so much haue the Kings translators well expressed in the margin against this Text. Threatning is a dutie which as occasion serueth masters ought to vse and that to preuent blowes But men in authoritie are naturally prone to insult ouer their inferiours and to thinke that they cannot shew their authoritie but by austerit ie for which reason the Apostle dehorteth husbands from bitternesse and parents from prouoking their children to wrath Besides the Gentiles and Heathen thought that they had an absolute power ouer seruants and that of life and death whereupon the Roman Emperors made lawes to restraine that rigour for they would vse their seruants like beasts Now that Christian masters should not be of the same minde the Apostle exhorteth them to forbeare threatning Hence note that Authoritie must be moderated and kept in compasse else will it be like a swelling riuer without bankes and wals Threatning is here put for all manner of rigor whether in heart looke words or actions for it is vsuall in Scripture to put one instance for all of the same kinde Forbearing implieth a restraint of all manner of excesse as 1. In time and continuance when there is nothing but continuall threatning vpon euery small and light occasion 2. In measure when threatning is too fierce and violent so as it maketh the heart to swell againe and as it were fire to come out of the eies and thunder out of the mouth and the body to shake in euery part thereof 3. In execution when euery vengeance once threatned shall surely be put in execution though the partie that caused the threatning be neuer so sorie for his fault and humble himselfe and promise amendment and giue good hope thereof Woe were it with vs the seruants of the high God if he should so deale with vs. Here note that men may exceed in doing a bounden dutie and so turne a needfull vertue into an hurtfull vice great respect therefore must be had to the manner of doing good and lawfull things Yet further for the extent of this prohibition we are to know that vnder the vice forbidden the contrarie vertues are commanded as mildnesse gentlenesse patience long suffering with the like §. 131. Of masters subiection to a greater master The latter part of this verse containeth a reason to enforce the directions in the former part The reason in summe layeth downe that subiection wherein masters are vnder God A point whereof none of them could be ignorant and therefore he thus setteth it downe knowing for All men know that there is an higher then the highest on earth The light of nature reuealeth as much no Pagan much lesse Christian can be ignorant thereof In that speaking to masters he telleth them that they haue a master thereby he giueth them to
is incest a sinne not only forbidden by Gods word but so horrible euen to the heathen as to vse the Apostles words 1 Cor. 5. 1. it is not so much as named among the Gentiles Excellently is that censure verified by the heathen Orators patheticall exclamation against one Sassia who maried her sonne in law in these words O incredible wickednesse of a woman not heard of in any age but this O vnbridled and vntamed lust O singular boldnesse Not to feare the power of God and fame of men c. Lust impudencie madnesse ouercame shame feare and reason What may we now thinke of the dispensations which the Pope giueth for incestuous mariages allowed vnto great Princes euen by the Tridentine councell doth he not herein shew himselfe to be that man of sinne who opposeth and exalteth himselfe aboue all that is called God 4. One that is free nor maried nor betrothed to another the law of mariage noteth thus much in this clause They two shall be one flesh And in that the law inflicteth the same punishment vpon the person which being betrothed committeth vncleannesse that it doth vpon a maried person it is euident that it is vnlawfull to marie one betrothed to another as well as one maried to another So firme is a contract as the law calleth a betrothed maid a wife and a betrothed maid might not be put away without a bill of diuorce Contrary is Bigamy and Polygamy whereof before vnto which head may be referred mariages with such as haue beene espoused to others before These are vtterly vnlawfull §. 8. Of the lawfulnesse of other mariages after one of the maried couple is dead 1. Quest Are they who haue buried their husband or wife so free as they may marie againe Answ Yea as free as they who were neuer before maried The law doth not only permit a widow to marie againe but if her husband died before he had any children it commanded the next kinsman that was liuing and free to marie her that he might raise vp seed to his brother deceased which if he refused to doe a penalty of ignominy was inflicted on him the widow reiected was to loose his shooe from his foot and to spit in his face in the presence of the Elders The Apostle expresly saith that a woman when her husband is dead is at liberty to be maried 1. Cor. 7. 39. yea speaking of young widowes he further saith I will that they marie 1. Tim. 5. 14. This libertie which the Prophet of God and Apostle of Christ grant to a wife can by no shew of reason be denied to an husband for the bond of mariage giueth them a like power ouer one anothers body 1 Cor. 7. 4. and knitteth one as inuiolably as the other Mat. 19. 6. Husbands therefore as well as wiues haue vsed this libertie as Abraham Gen. 25. 1. The Apostle that giueth this libertie rendreth a reason thereof taken from the limitation of that time wherein maried persons haue power one ouer another and that is the time of this life only For the woman which hath an husband is bound by the law to her husband so long as he liueth but if the husband be dead she is loosed c. On this ground all the reasons which warrant or moue such as neuer were maried to mary may be applied to them that by death haue their yoake-fellow taken from them 2. Quest May this libertie be extended any further then to a second mariage Answ We finde no restraint from a third or fourth or more mariages if by the diuine prouidence so many wiues or husbands one after another be taken away while there is need for the suruiuing partie to vse the benefit of mariage The woman of Samaria that had fiue husbands one after another is not blamed for being maried to so many but for liuing with one after the other were dead that was not her husband Ioh. 4. 18 Neither did the Lord condemne that woman which was said to haue seuen husbands one after another Mat. 22. 25 c. Contrarie is the opinion of Montanists and Cataphryges ancient heretiques that accounted those mariages which the suruiuor made after the death of a yoke-fellow to be adulterous with which heresie Tertullian an ancient and learned father was so farre infected as he wrote a treatise in defence thereof It seemeth by their arguments that one maine ground of their error was a misinterpretation of those Scriptures which forbid men to haue two wiues at once and women to haue two husbands at once as Two shall be one flesh Gen. 2. 24. A Bishop and a Deacon must be the husband of one wife 1 Tim. 2. 2 10. Let a widow be taken that hath beene the wife of one husband 1 Tim. 5. 9. These are indeed expresse texts against such Digamists and Polygamists as haue beene described before but they make no more against second or other after-mariages one mate being dead then against first mariages Into the roll of these heretiques may they be put who denie such after mariages to any kinde of Ministers So doe our aduersaries they exclude such as are maried againe after one wife is dead from such functions of inferiour orders as they admit those who are but once maried vnto They alleage many of those Scriptures which Montanists doe as 1 Tim. 2. 2 10. and 5. 9 which sheweth that they are infected with the same heresie though they pretend to renounce it §. 9. Of equalitie in yeeres betwixt husband and wife That matrimoniall societie may proue comfortable it is requisite that there should be some equalitie betwixt the parties that are maried in Age Estate Condition Pietie 1. For Age as the partie that seeketh a mate must be of ripe yeeres fit to giue consent and able to performe mariage duties so the mate which is taken must be somewhat answerable in age if one young both young if one of middle age both so if one growne to yeeres the other also It is noted of Zacharie and Elizabeth that both were well striken in yeeres If both were old together then both also were young together Equalitie in yeeres maketh maried persons more fit for procreation of children for a mutuall performance of mariage duties each to other and for making their companie and societie euery way more happie This equalitie is not ouer strictly to be taken as if the maried couple were to be iust of the same age but only for some answerablenesse in yeeres which may be though there be a disparitie of fiue or ten or somewhat more yeeres especially if the excesse of yeeres be on the husbands part for besides that according to the ordinarie course of nature a mans strength and vigour lasteth longer then a womans it is very meet that the husband should be some what elder then his wife because he is an head a gouernour a protector of his wife The
common-wealth For by mariage families are erected and Church and common-wealth increased and continued 2. Mariage is honourable The most sacred and inuiolable bond that knitteth any two persons together 3. Mariage is Gods couenant wherein he himselfe hath a maine and principall stroke For God is the chiefest agent in ioyning man and woman in mariage On these grounds it hath beene thought very requisite that mariage should be solemnized in the day time as a worke of light that need not be couertly and closely done and that in a publike place whether any that will may haue free accesse either to except against it and hinder it if there be iust cause or to be a witnesse thereof and to adde his blessing thereto And among publike places the Church is thought the fittest because it is the house of praier where persons and actions are most solemnly blessed And of all persons a publike Minister is thought to be the meetest to celebrate mariage and to ioyne the parties to be maried together because he stands in Gods roome and in and by his ministerie God ioyneth them together and blesseth them so as after the minister hath rightly ioyned man and wife together in matrimony it may be well said Those whom God hath ioyned together let no man put asunder The forme of consecrating mariage which is prescribed in our liturgie or common-prayer-booke doth so distinctly perspicuously and fully set downe whatsoeuer is to be obserued and done by the parties to be maried their parents or other gouernours and the Minister that ioyneth them together that I can adde nothing thereunto There are declared the grounds ends and vses of mariage There open proclamation is made whether any can except against the intended mariage There each partie is solemnly charged that if either of them doe know any impediment why they may not lawfully be maried to disclose it There also each partie is openly demanded if freely and willingly they will take one another for man and wife There the duties of maried persons are declared and they seuerally asked whether they will subiect themselues thereto or no. All which being openly professed the parent or some in his stead is called forth to giue the Bride to the Bridegroome Then they two actually taking each other to be man and wife and testifying the same by expresse words and by mutuall pledges the Minister in Gods name ioyneth them together pronounceth them to be lawfull husband and wife and by prayer craueth Gods blessing vpon the action and vpon their persons Thus is the mariage consecrated and they two made one flesh that is lawfully ioyned together by the inuiolable bond of mariage §. 20. Of clandestine mariages Contrary are clandestine mariages such as are made in priuate houses or other secret places or in Churches without a sufficient number of witnesses or in the night time or without a lawfull Minister of the word with the like As such seeking of secrecie taketh much from the honour and dignitie of mariage so it implieth some euill cleauing thereto For euery man that euill doth hateth the light There is little hope that such mariages should haue any good successe For where such meanes as are sanctified for obtaining a blessing on mariage are neglected what blessing can thereupon be expected §. 21. Of a ciuill celebrating of mariage Though vpon the forenamed consecrating of mariage it be in regard of the substance thereof fully consummate yet for the greater solemnity of so honourable a thing it is very requisite that further there be added a ciuill celebration of it vnder which I comprise all those lawfull customes that are vsed for the setting forth of the outward solemnitie thereof as meeting of friends accompanying the Bridegroome and Bride both to and from the Church putting on best apparell feasting with other tokens of reioycing for which we haue expresse warrant out of Gods word For the generall that the mariage time is a time of reioycing some gather from the notation of the word as if it were stiled mariage of merry age But to let that passe The Scripture vseth to set forth a time of reioycing by the ioy of the Bridegroome ouer his Bride and stileth the voice of a Bridegroome and a Bride the voice of ioy and gladnesse And on the contrary counteth it a iudgement when ioy is taken away from the Bridegroome and the Bride For meeting of friends at the time of mariage it is noted that Laban gathered together all the men of the place when his daughter was maried And when Sampson was maried they brought thirtie companions to him And when a friend of the virgin Marie was maried Iesus and his Disciples besides many other were inuited thereto And in the parable of the mariage of the Kings sonne it is noted that many guests were bidden to the wedding In all which histories it is further noted that feasts were made at the solemnizing of those mariages And the phrases which the Prophet vseth of a Bridegroomes decking himselfe with ornaments and a Brides adorning her selfe with Iewels giue warrant for putting on the best apparell at that time Here by the way let good heed be taken that the things which may lawfully be vsed be not vnlawfully abused as commonly mariage-festiuities and that especially in feastings are §. 22. Of ill or well ordering mariage feasts Mariage feasts are abused 1. When they are made at an vnseasonable time as on the Lords day or in a time of mourning 2. When they exceed the abilitie of him that maketh the feasts 3. When the abundance prepared is immoderatly taken euen to gluttony and drunkennesse The lewd practise of drinking healths to the Bridegroome and Bride oft causeth much excesse in drunkennesse 4. When too much time is spent therein 5. When God is cleane forgotten therein and the companie poysoned with corrupt communication vnchaste songs and the like 6. When the needy and distressed are not remembred therein For preuenting of these abuses a seasonable time for celebrating mariage must be chosen out and moderation vsed both by him that maketh the feast and also by them that partake thereof moderation I say in the measure of eating and drinking and in the time spent therein which time must be sanctified with such communication as is good to the vse of edifying that it may minister grace vnto the hearers And for the more cheerefulnesse therein witty questions and doubtfull riddles may be propounded as Sampson did to exercise the wit and iudgement of the guests there may be also singing Psalmes and hymnes and spirituall songs making melodie in their hearts to the Lord. Yea further that the mariage meeting mirth and feasting may be the better sanctified good choice is to be made of the guests that are inuited thereto Hereof we haue a worthy patterne in those who were maried in Cana of Galile
of a wiues separation for her disease Leu. 15. 19. c. For what can be expected â—m such polluted copulation but a leprous and loathsome generation This kinde of intemperancie is expresly forbidden Leuit. 18. 19. and a capitall punishment inflicted on such as offended therein Leuit. 20. 18. Abstinence in this time is set in the catalogue of those notes which declare a man to be righteous Eccles 20. 7. and the contrary intemperancy is put in the roll of such abominations as prouoked God to spue out the Canaanits Leuit. 18. 28. and to forsake his owne inheritance Ezek. 22. 10. To this kinde of intemperancie some referre a mans knowing of his wife after she hath conceiued with childe But I finde no such matter condemned in Gods word neither dare I make that a sinne which is not there condemned Certaine Sectaries among the Iewes are branded for this error 1. Obiect No other creature will so doe so as it may seeme to be against nature Answ 1. I denie the argument though some forbeare yet all doe not 2. I denie the consequence for other creatures are not so tied one male to one female as an husband to his owne wife Besides that which beasts by nature are tied vnto must be left to mans discretion 2. Obiect After a woman hath once conceiued no more conceptions can be expected till she be deliuered Answ Conception is not the only end of this dutie for it is to be rendred to such as are barren Quest What if the wife giue sucke to her childe ought not her husband then to forbeare Answ Because giuing sucke is a mother dutie man ought to doe what he can to containe §. 10. Of mutuall loue betwixt man and wife Hitherto of those common mutuall duties which tend to the preseruation of the very being of mariage and are in that respect absolutely necessarie The other common mutuall duties though they be not of so absolute necessitie as the former are in their kinde necessary for the good estate of mariage and for the better preseruing of that knot so as if they be not performed the end and right vse of mariage will be peruerted that estate made vncomfortable very burdensome The first of these is Loue. A louing mutuall affection must passe betwixt husband and wife or else no dutie will be well performed this is the ground of all the rest In some respects Loue is proper and peculiar to an husband as I purpose to shew when I come to speake of an husbands particular duties But Loue is also required of wiues and they are commanded to be louers of their husbands as well as husbands to loue their wiues so as it is a common mutuall dutie belonging to husband and wife too and that is true wedlocke when man and wife are linked together by the bond of loue Vnder loue all other duties are comprised for without it no dutie can be well performed Loue is the fulfilling of the Law that is the very life of all those duties which the law requireth It is the bond of perfection which bindeth together all those duties that passe betwixt partie and partie Where loue aboundeth there all duties will readily and cheerefully be performed Where loue is wanting there euery duty will either be altogether neglected or so carelesly performed that as good not be performed at all in which respect the Apostle willeth that all things be done in loue Loue as it prouoketh the partie in whom it ruleth to doe all the good it can so it stirreth vp the partie loued to repay good for good It is like fire which is not only hot in it selfe but also conueigheth heat into that which is neere it whence ariseth a reflection of heat from one to another Note how admirably this is set forth betwixt Christ and his Spouse in the Song of Salomon and it is further manifested in the examples of all good husbands and wiues noted in the Scripture they did mutually beare a very louing affection one to another Though loue be a general duty which euery one oweth to another euen to his enemie yet the neerer that God hath linked any together the more are they bound to this dutie and the more must they abound therein But of all others are man and wife most neerely and firmly linked together Of all others therefore are they most bound hereunto that in the highest degree that may be euen like to Ionathans loue who loued Dauid as his owne soule Salomon saith He that findeth a wife findeth a good thing and obtaineth fauour of the Lord which by the rule of relation is also true of an husband Shee that findeth an husband findeth a good thing and obtaineth fauour of the Lord. Man and wife therefore are each to other an especiall pledge of Gods fauour and in this respect aboue all others vnder God to be loued If this be the ground as it ought to be of their mutuall loue their loue will be feruent and constant Neither will the want or withering of any outward allurements as beautie personage parentage friends riches honours or the like with-hold or with-draw extinguish or extenuate their loue neither will any excellencies of nature or grace in other husbands and wiues draw their hearts from their owne to those other nor yet will the loue of a former yoake-fellow dead and gone any whit lessen the loue of the liuing mate This instance I haue the rather mentioned because in many who are farre from setting their affection on strange flesh their loue of a former husband or wife departed is so fast fixed in their heart as they can neuer againe so intirely loue any other They who are so minded are not fit to be ioined with another yoke-fellow after they are loosed from one If they mary againe and manifest such a minde they plainly shew that they respect this or that person more then Gods ordinance By Gods ordinance man and wife are no longer bound one to another then they liue together Death is an absolute diremption and maketh an vtter dissolution of the mariage bond If the man be dead the wife is deliuered from the law of the man so as shee may take another man Which liberty is also giuen to the man Being now free if they mary another that other being now a true husband or wife their loue must be as intire to that other as it was to the former yea and more intire if there were any defect in the former For as children maried out of their parents house must not retaine such a loue of their parents as shall swallow vp their loue of the partie to whom they are maried but must according to the law leaue father and mother and cleaue to their yoke-fellow so neither must the loue of a former husband or wife be predominant when they are maried to another This other must be as close cleaued
knowne who had it Many there be who in mistrust of their husbands prouidence or in dislike of them or on some other by-respects commit whatsoeuer they can get to the trust and custody of others whereby it oft commeth to passe that they themselues meeting with deceitfull friends are vtterly defeated euen because they dare not make their fraud knowne As Couetousnesse is in it selfe an odious sinne so it is made much more hainous by defrauding husband or wife who ought to be as deare each to other as themselues 2. Prodigalitie and too lauish spending vpon themselues and those things which are most agreeable to their owne corrupt humor as when husbands without any meane or meaâ—ure spend their goods abroad in hunting hauking carding â—icing eating drinking or the like and suffer their wiues to want at home and yet tooke their wiues to maintaine them and therefore had their portion Or when wiues bring their husbands into debt and weaken if not cleane ouerthrow their estate by gorgeous decking and adorning their houses by braue and costly apparell by dainty fare by gossipping abroad with the like Many wiues are so violent herein that if their desire and humour be not satisfied their husbands shall haue no rest forsooth they brought a portion and maintained they must and will be it skilleth not whether their husbands estate can beare it or no in so much as many are forced wittingly for quietnesse sake to suffer their estate to sinke O foolish and wretched wiues how little do they consider that they were maried to doe their husbands good and not euill all the daies of their life is this to be an helpe to man or rather is it not cleane to thwart Gods counsell and peruert his purpose can we thinke that God will forbeare and not be auenged of them yet much more will God be auenged of the forenamed husbands because of that image of himselfe which he hath placed in them and because of that place and authority wherein he hath set them The Apostle expresly saith of them that they are worse then Infidels which being so they must looke for the greater iudgement 3. Idlenesse and a carelesse neglect of their estate Many men spend day after day like a bird that flieth vp and downe as it falleth out from tree to tree from twigge to twigge they goe from place to place but know not for what end as they meet with any company so they abide as long as the company tarrieth and then seeke after other company and are ready to goe with any to Ale-house Tauerne Play-house Bowling-alley or other like places Many women also spend all the forenoone in lying a bed and tyring themselues and the afternoone as occasion is offered in sitting idly at home or walking forth to little purpose but only to weare out time little regarding their husbands estate whether it increase or diminish Thus by the idlenesse and carelesnesse of husband and wife come faire estates many times to ruine and both of then brought to penury and beggery §. 40. Of husbands and wiues ioint care in gouerning the family Hitherto I haue deliuered such common duties as mutually respect the husband and wife and are to be performed of each to other There are other common duties which they are both iointly bound to performe to other persons and those either members of the family or strangers comming to the family Concerning the members of the family though there be some peculiar duties belonging to the master and some to the mistresse some to the father and some to the mother of which we shall speake in their due place yet in generall the gouernment of the family and the seuerall members thereof belongeth to the husband and wife both if at least they haue a family and a ioint common dutie it is to be helpfull one to another therein Obiect Seeing it is not necessarily required that a husband and wife should haue a family to gouerne for two may be maried and haue neither children nor seruants as many are and yet be true husband and wife why is this care of a family ranked among the duties of husband and wife Answ 1. Because ordinarily when two are maried they gather a family and are the gouernours thereof so as though it faile in some particulars yet for the most part it holdeth 2. Because the ioint gouernment whereof I speake in this place is by vertue of the mariage-bond for if a man and a woman should liue together in an house and by mutuall consent haue a ioint authority and gouernment this would be very offensiue to all that should know it or heare of it neither were they by any ordinance of God bound to be so helpfull one to another as husband and wife nor the members of a family so bound to subiect themselues to both 3. The duty whereof I speake though it be about the gouernment of a family yet hath it respect to an husband as he is an husband and to a wife as shee is a wife namely that by vertue of their mariage-bond and neere vnion they be helpfull one to another in well-ordering the things of the family Whether the man ought to look to the good gouernment of his house is a question without all question He is the highest in the family and hath both authoritie ouer all and the charge of all is committed to his charge he is as a king in his owne house as a king is to see that land well gouerned where he is king so he that is the chiefe ruler in an house The dutie which the Apostle applieth in particular to Bishops Deacons in generall appertaineth to all husbands that they rule their owne house honestly and againe that they be such as can rule their children well and their owne housholds The care of many husbands is in this respect commended in Scripture as of Abram of Iaakob of Iosuah of Dauid the Ruler at Galile and of many other That the wife also ought to be an helpe to him therein is very euident for the Apostle layeth it expresly to their charge that they gouerne the house would the Wise man haue so highly commended a wife for well gouerning her husbands house if it had not appertained to her It is very likely that wise Abigail had a great hand in gouerning Nabals house because the seruants made complaint to her of Nabals churlishnesse and because she had the seruants at command readily to doe what she would haue them yea also because she could so readily prepare such store of prouision for Dauid and his men as she did Hence is it that the wife is called mistresse of the house as well as the husband master of the house Obiect A woman is not to teach nor to vsurpe authoritie ouer the man Answ 1. That branch of teaching hath respect to publike assemblies and Churches in which she may not
teach but not to priuate families in which she may and ought to teach for Barthshebah taught Salomon When Apollos was brought to the house of Aquila Priscilla the wife of Aquila did helpe to expound to Apollos the way of God more perfectly 2. The other branch concerning authoritie hath not reference to the inferiour members in the family ouer which the wife of an houshold gouernour hath authoritie but only to the husband ouer whom if she take any authoritie she vsurpeth it Therfore neither this place of Scripture nor any other doth exclude the wife being iointly considered with the husband to rule gouerne those in the family which are vnder them both 2. Obiect This ioint gouernment of the wife doth much impaire the dignity and authority of the husband Answ Nothing lesse for she is subordinate to her husband and must so rule others as she be subiect to her husband and not command any thing against his command prouided that his command be not against the Lord and his word We see that in all estates the king or highest gouernour hath other Magistrates vnder him who haue a command ouer the subiects and yet thereby the kings supreme authoritie is no whit impaired but rather the better established and he the more honoured So is it in a family Let therefore husbands and wiues herein assist one another for so they may be very helpfull one to another and bring by their mutuall helpe in gouerning much good to the family The husband by his helpe aiding his wife addeth much authoritie vnto her and so causeth that she is not despised nor lightly esteemed The wife by her helpe causeth many things to be espied and so redressed which otherwise might neuer haue beene found out for two eies see more then one especially when one of those is more at hand and in presence as the wife is in the house Besides there are many things in well gouerning a family more fit for one to meddle withall then for the other as for the husband to meddle with the great and weightie affaires of the family as performing Gods worship appointing and setling good orders prouiding conuenient house-roome and other necessaries for the family keeping children when they grow great or waxe stubborne in awe ruling men seruants with the like And for the wife to meddle with some lesse but very needfull matters as nourishing and instructing children when they are young adorning the house ordering the prouision brought into the house ruling maid seruants with the like Yea further as the man especially is to performe the very actions of prayer reading the word catechizing and other like duties in the family so the wife may be a great helpe in putting her husband in minde both of the dutie it selfe and of the time of performing it and incouraging him to doe it in gathering the family together and exhorting them to be forward in making her selfe an example to the rest by her diligent and reuerend attention in oft vrging and pressing to her children and seruants such points of instruction as her husband hath taught yea in praying reading teaching and performing like exercises her selfe so farre as she is able when her husband is absent or negligent and carelesse and will not himselfe doe them or it may be is not able to doe them or if she performe them not her selfe in getting some other to performe them §. 41. Of the vices contrary to a ioint care of gouerning the family The minde and practise of many both husbands and wiues is contrary to this dutie Many a husband because the wiues office is especially to abide at home will put off all gouernment to the wife leauing it to her not only to order the things in the house but also to bring in all needful things to order and gouerne the children both young and old yea euen to prouide for them also to take in to put out to vse all sorts of seruants as pleaseth her yea if seruants shall be stubborne and stout against her he will take no notice of it nor endure to be told of it much lesse afford her his assistance but suffer her to be disgraced and despised As for religious duties he will no way meddle with them Oh base minded men vnworthy to be husbands and heads of wiues shall your wiues who were made to be an helpe to you haue no helpe from you â—o not in those things which especially belong to your charge shall the weaker vessels beare all the burden Assuredly as the man carrieth away the greatest reputation and honour when a family is well gouerned though it be by the ioynt care and wisdome of his wife so lieth he most open to the iudgement of God if the gouernment thereof be neglected and through the neglect thereof children and seruants grow impious instance Elie and Dauid For as in a common-wealth the greatest honour of good gouernment victorious battels happy peace and prosperity and the greatest dishonor and dammage of the contrary redoundeth to the king so to the man who is chiefe gouernour in a family for it is presupposed that all which doe any good are instruments of the highest gouernour if any euill or mischiefe fall out that it is through his negligence On the other side because the husband is the most principall many wiues thinke that the gouernment of the family nothing at all appertaines to them and thereupon are carelesse of the good thereof and will not stirre their least finger to order any thing aright but if any thing be amisse lay all the blame on their husbands Doe not such peruert that maine end for which God made them euen to be an helpe Doe they not carrie themselues most vnworthy of the place wherein God hath set them namely to be ioynt-gouernours with their husbands and partakers of their dignities As by their negligence they make themselues accessary to all the euill which falleth out in the family so assuredly shall they haue their part in those iudgements which are executed on the head thereof Most contrary to the forenamed dutie is the practise of such as are hindrances one to another in gouerning the family as when wiues are not only negligent themselues in comming to religious exercises but keepe backe children and seruants and so are a great griefe vnto their religious husbands or when they vse any of the children or seruants to be instruments of iniquity or are themselues disquiet and troublesome in the house like to her of whom Salomon speaketh in this prouerbe It is better to dwell in the corner of the house top then with a contentious woman in a wide house Husbands also are oft an hinderance to that good gouernment which their wiues would helpe forward when they scoffe and scorne at that good counsell which their wiues giue them for that purpose or when they will not suffer their wiues to meddle with any thing at
a kinde of obeysance This is not so to be taken as if no difference were to be made betwixt the carriage of a seruant or childe and a wife or as if a wife should bow at euery word that she speaketh to her husband Though in the kinde and extent of many duties the same things are required of wiues which are required of children and seruants because God hath made them all inferiours and exacted subiection of all yet in the manner and measure of many duties there is great difference as in this the obeysance of children and seruants ought to be more submissiue and more frequent Yet because God hath placed authority in the husband ouer his wife she is euery way to testifie her reuerend respect of her husband and therefore at some times on some occasions as when he is going on a iourney for a time from her or when he returneth home againe or when she hath a solemne and great sute to make vnto him or when he offereth an especiall and extraordinary fauour vnto her or as I haue obserued such wiues as know what beseemeth their place and are not ashamed to manifest as much when she sitteth downe or riseth vp from table to declare her reuerence by some obeysance This cannot but much worke on the heart of a good and kinde husband and make him the more to respect his wife when he beholdeth this euidence of her respect to him Yea it cannot but be a good patterne to children and seruants and a motiue to stirre them vp to yeeld all submissiue obeysance both to her husband and to her selfe For it may make them thus to reason with themselues shall we scorne or thinke much to yeeld that to our father or master which our mother or mistresse thinketh not much to yeeld to her husband shall-she bow to him and shall not we much more bow to her Thus a wiues honouring of her husband by yeelding obeysance to him maketh both him and her selfe to be more honoured of others Contrarily minded are they who not only altogether omit this dutie but also gibe and scoffe at the very hearing thereof saying thus wiues shall be made no better then children or seruants But though scornefull dames deride these outward euidences of their subiection yet such wiues as feare the Lord ought not to be hindered thereby from doing their dutie for by such euill examples they might be discouraged from euery good dutie It is sufficient that such holy women as trusted in God so behaued themselues But for this particular we know that equals scorne not vpon occasions to performe this kinde of courtesie in making obeysance one to another how much lesse ought wiues who are their husbands inferiours §. 12. Of wife-like modestie in apparell Modestie appertaining to a wife is much manifested in her apparell S. Paul requireth this modestie in generall of all sorts of women but S. Peter presseth it in particular vpon wiues For as it well beseemeth all women so wiues after a peculiar manner namely in attiring themselues to respect rather their husbands place and state then their owne birth and parentage but much rather then their owne minde and humour A wiues modestie therefore requireth that her apparell be neither for costlinesse aboue her husbands abilitie nor for curiousnesse vn beseeming his calling As a poore mans wife must not affect costly apparell so neither Ministers graue Counsellours sage Magistrates no nor conscionable Professours wiues hunt after new fashions or in light and garish apparell attire themselues It is a token of great reuerence in a wife towards her husband to haue an eye to his place and state in her apparell On the contrarie such proud daines as must haue their owne will in their attire and thinke it nothing appertaineth to their husbands to order them therein who care not what their husbands abilitie or what his place and calling be they shew little respect and reuerence to their husbands Such are they who are no whit moued with their husbands example but though the mans apparell be plaine and graue yet the wiues shall be costly and garish Yea many there be that stand in some more awe of their husbands sight but shew little more respect vnto him who haue their silken gownes Beauer hats and other like attire not agreeable to their place and state lie in the countrey if they be of the citie or in the citie if they be of the countrey in a friends house where their husbands shall not know it and when their husbands are not with them weare them and paint their faces lay out their haire and in euerie thing follow the fashion What can they which behold this thinke but that such a wiues care is more to please other light vaine persons then her graue discreet husband or that her husband can nothing at all preuaile with her which as it staineth her owne credit so it leaueth a blot of dishonour euen vpon him If the care of a wife were to giue euidence of the reuerence which she beareth to her husband his desire and example would in this respect more preuaile with her then the humour of her owne heart §. 13. Of a wiues reuerend speech to her husband As by gesture so by speech also must a wiues reuerence be manifested this must be answerable to that For by words as well as by deeds the affection of the heart is manifested Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh A wiues reuerence is manifested by her speech both in her husbands presence and also in his absence For this end in his presence her words must be few reuerend and meeke First few For the Apostle enioyneth silence to wiues in their husbands presence and inforceth that dutie with a strong reason in these words I permit not the woman to vsurpe authoritie ouer the man but to be in silence the inference of the latter clause vpon the former sheweth that he speaketh not only of a womans silence in the Church but also of a wiues silence before her husband which is further cleared by another like place where the same Apostle enioyneth wiues to learne of their husbands at home The reason before mentioned for silence on the one side implieth a reuerend subiection as on the other side too much speech implieth an vsurpation of authoritie Obiect Then belike a wife must be alwayes mute before her husband Answ No such matter for silence in that place is not opposed to speech as if she should not speake at all but to loquacitie to talkatiuenesse to ouer-much tatling her husbands presence must some what restraine her tongue and so will her verie silence testifie a reuerend respect Otherwise silence as it is opposed to speech would imply stoutnesse of stomacke and stubbornnesse of heart which is an extreme contrarie to loquacitie But the meane betwixt both is for a wife to be sparing in speech to expect
then to keepe in their tongues with bit and bridle but most of all to take heed that their husbands taste not of the bitternesse thereof no not though they should by some ouersight of their husbands be prouoked It is to be noted how Salomon calleth the iarres which are betweene man and wife the contentions of a wife whereby he intimateth that she commonly is the cause thereof either by prouoking her husband or not bearing with him §. 16. Of a wiues speech of her husband in his absence The reuerence which a wife beareth to her husband must further be manifested by her speeches of him in his absence So did Sarah manifest her reuerence and so must all such as desire to be accounted the daughters of Sarah The Church speaking of her Spouse doth it with as great reuerence as if she had spoken to him It was for honour and reuerence sake that the Virgin Mary called Ioseph the Father of Iesus when she spake of him This sheweth that a wiues reuerend speeches in presence of her husband and to his face are not in flatterie to please him and fawne vpon him but in sinceritie to please God and performe her dutie Contrary therefore to their dutie deale they who in presence can afford the fairest and meek est speeches that may be to their husbands face but behinde their backs speake most reproachfully of them §. 17. Of a wiues obedience in generall Hitherto of a wiues reuerence it followeth to speake of her obedience The first law that euer was giuen to woman since her fall laid vpon her this dutie of Obedience to her husband in these words Thy desire shall be to thine husband and he shall rule ouer thee How can an husband rule ouer a wife if she obey not him The principall part of that submission which in this text and in many other places is required of a wife consisteth in obedience and therefore it is expresly commended vnto wiues in the example of Sarah who obeyed Abraham Thus by Obedience doth the Church manifest her subiection to Christ The place wherein God hath set an husband namely to be an head the authoritie which he hath giuen vnto him to be a Lord and Master the duty which he requireth of him to rule doe all require obedience of a wife Is not obedience to be yeelded to an Head Lord and Master Take away all authoritie from an husband if ye exempt a wife from obedience Contrary is the stoutnesse of such wiues as must haue their own will and doe what they list or else all shall be out of quiet Their will must be done they must rule and ouer-rule all they must command not only children and seruants but husbands also if at least the husband will be at peace Looke into families obserue the estate and condition of many of them and then tell me if these things be not so If an husband be a man of courage and seeke to stand vpon his right and maintaine his authoritie by requiring obedience of his wife strange it is to behold what an hurly burly she will make in the house but if he be a milke-sop and basely yeeld vnto his wife and suffer her to rule then it may be there shall be some outward quiet The ground hereof is an ambitious and proud humour in women who must needs rule or else they thinke themselues slaues But let them thinke as they list assuredly herein they thwart Gods ordinance peruert the order of nature deface the image of Christ ouerthrow the ground of all dutie hinder the good of the family become an ill patterne to children and seruants lay themselues open to Satan and incurre many other mischiefes which cannot but follow vpon the violating of this maine duty of Obedience which if it be not performed how can other duties be expected §. 18. Of the cases wherein a wife hath power to order things of the house without her husbands consent A wiues obedience requireth Submission Contentment  Submission in yeelding to her husbands minde and will Contentment in resting satisfied and content with his estate and abilitie That Submission consisteth in two things First in abstaining from doing things against her husbands minde Secondly in doing what her husband requireth The former of these requireth that a wife haue her husbands consent for the things which she doth For the better cleering whereof we are to consider 1. What kinde of husbands they must be whose consent is required 2. How many waies his consent may be giuen 3. What are the things whereabout his consent is to be expected For the first as on the one side it oft falleth out that a wife prouident and religious man is maried to a foolish woman a very ideot that hath no vnderstanding of whom there can be no question but that such a wife is to doe nothing of her selfe and of her owne head but altogether to be ordered by her husband So on the other side it oft falleth out that a wise vertuous and gratious woman is maried to an husband destitute of vnderstanding to a very naturall as we say or a â—renzy man or to one made very blockish and stupid vnfit to manage his affaires through some distemper wound or sicknesle In such a case the whole gouernment lieth vpon the wife so as her husbands consent is not to be expected Quest What if the husband be a wicked and prophane man and so blinded and stupified in his soule doth not this spirituall blindnesse and blockishnese giue a religious wife as great libertie as naturall stupiditie Answ No verily For S. Peter exhorteth faithfull wiues that were maried to Infidell husbands to be subiect to them and that in feare The reason is cleare For spirituall blindnesse disableth not from ciuill gouernment indeed nothing that such a man doth is acceptable to God or auailable to his owne saluation but yet it may be profitable to man a wicked man may be prouident enough for wife children and whole family in outward temporall things Againe it oft falleth out that an husband is a long time farre off absent from the house sometimes by reason of his calling as an Ambassadour Souldier or Mariner sometimes also carelesly or wilfully neglecting house goods wife children and all and in his absence hath left no order for the ordering of things at home in this case also there is no question but that the wife hath power to dispose matters without her husbands consent prouided that she obserue those rules of Gods word concerning iustice equitie truth and mercie which an husband in his disposing of them ought to obserue The first of these cases declareth an impotencie in the husband the other an impossibilitie for him to order matters wherefore the wife being next to the husband the power of ordering things is diuolued on her she is not bound to haue his consent §. 19.
Of diuers kindes of consent II. A consent may be generall or particular A generall consent is giuen when without distinct respect to this or that particular libertie is granted to a wife by her husband to doe all things as seemeth good in her owne eyes That excellent good wife and notable good house-wife that is set forth by the Wise-man had such a consent For first it is said The heart of her husband trusteth in her and then it is inferred that she ordereth all the things of the house whereof many particulars are there specified Whence I gather that her husband obseruing her to be a godly wise faithfull and industrious woman gaue her power and liberty to doe in the house-hold affaires what she thought good he being a publike magistrate for he was knowne in the gates sitting among the Elders of the land and accordingly she vsed her liberty A particular consent is that which is giuen to one or more particular things as that consent which Abraham gaue to Sarah about Hagar and that which Elkanah gaue to Hanna about tarrying at home till her childe was weined This particular consent may be expressed or implied An expressed consent is when the husband manifesteth his good liking by word writing message or signe and that whether his consent be asked as was noted in the example of Elkanah or freely offered An implicit consent when by any probable coniecture it may be gathered that the husbands will is not against such a thing though he haue not manifested his minde concerning that very particular This implicit consent may be gathered either by his silence when he is present to see a thing done or otherwise hath knowledge thereof or else when he is absent by his former cariage or disposition in other like cases The Scripture accounteth an husbands silence when he knoweth a thing and may but doth not forbid it to be a consent as in the case of a wiues vow For any thing we read to the contrary the Shunemite had no other consent to prepare a chamber for the Prophet and to goe vnto him then her husbands silence and not forbidding it when he knew it As for the other kinde of implicit consent it may be set forth in this following instance suppose a good wife hath an husband whom she knoweth by his former cariage and disposition to be a pittifull and charitable man taking all occasions to shew mercy and in his absence there falleth out a fit and needfull occasion of shewing mercy if she take that occasion to shew mercy she hath an implicit consent for she may well thinke that if her husband knew it he would approue what she doth It is to be supposed that Annah vpon some such ground vowed her childe to God For it is not likely that she who would not tarry at home to weine her childe without her husbands consent would much lesse vow him to the Lord which was a farre greater matter without some perswasion of her husbands good liking thereof Now that a wife may shew she dealeth vprightly in this case vpon a true perswasion of her heart concerning her husbands minde she ought when conueniently she can to make known to her husband what she hath done as without all question Annah did and so much may be gathered out of these words which Elkanah vttered to Annah the Lord establish his word §. 20. Of the things whereabout a wife must haue her husbands consent The things whereabout an husbands consent is to be expected are such as he by vertue of his place and authoritie hath power to order as for example ordering and disposing the goods cattell seruants and children of the family entertaining strangers yea also ordering euen his wiues going abroad and making of vowes with the like now then distinctly to lay downe a wiues dutie in this first branch of obedience it is this A wife must doe nothing which appertaineth to her husband authoritie simply without or directly against his consent Doe not these words of that old law thy desire shall be to thy husband imply as much I deny not but that there may be sundry things proper and peculiar to a wife wherein I will not restraine her libertie and therefore I vse this phrase which appertaineth to her husbands authoritie And I grant the forenamed generall and implicit consent to be a true consent so as there needeth not an expresse particular consent for euery thing and therefore I haue added these clauses simply without or directly against consent That is done simply without consent which is done without all warrant from the husband and that so couertly as she is afraid it should come to his notice imagining he would by no meanes like it As Rahels taking her fathers idols without all consent of Iaakob That is done directly against consent which is expresly forbidden and disclaimed by the husband But to descend to the particulars before mentioned First concerning the goods of the family It is a question controuerted whether the wife haue power to dispose them without or against the husbands consent Before I determine the question I thinke it needfull to declare 1. What goods 2. What occasion of giuing the question is about §. 21. Of the things which a wife may dispose without her husbands consent 1. For the goods some are proper and peculiar to the wife others are common Goods proper to the wife are such as before mariage she her selfe or her friends except from the husband to her sole and proper vse and disposing whereunto he also yeeldeth or such as after mariage he giueth vnto her to dispose as she please suppose it be some rent annuity fees â—ailes or the like These kindes of goods are exempted out of the question in hand the wife hath liberty to dispose them as she please without any further consent then she had by vertue of her hausbands former grant To these I may referre other goods but of another nature namely such as some friend of hers suppose father mother brother or any other obseruing her husband to be a very â—ard man not allowing sufficient for her selfe much lesse to distribute on charitable vses shall giue vnto her to dispose as â—e please charging her not to let her husband know thereof How because it is in the power of a free doner to order his â—ift as he please and because he so ordereth this gift as he will not haue her husband know of it I doubt not but she may of her selfe according to the doners minde without her husbands consent dispose such goods She is herein but as a â—offee in trust Againe of common goods some are set forth by the husband to be spent about the family other he reserueth for a â—ocke or to lay forth as he himselfe shall see occasion Concerning those which are set forth to be spent I doubt â—ot but the wife hath power
to her husband and also to her selfe To her husband in that it will make her manifest her respect of him before others behinde his backe as well as before himselfe in his presence and also will make her faithfull to him and carefull to doe his will wheresoeuer he be with her or from her To her selfe in that it will minister inward sweet comfort vnto her though her husband should take no notice of her subiection or mif-interpret it or ill requite it for she might say as Hezekiah did Remember ô Lord how I haue walked before thee in truth and with a perfect heart and haue done that which is good in thy sight That the Church doth season all her subiection with sinceritie is cleare in that she is said to be all glorious within there is no glory within without sinceritie and in that she is oft said to seeke him whom her soule loued if her soule loued him in sinceritie of heart she was subiect to him Therefore as the Church is sincerely subiect to Christ so let wiues be to their husbands §. 58. Of wiues complementall subiection Contrary to sinceritie is dissimulation and meere outward complementall subiection when a wife doth euen despise her husband in her heart as Michal did Dauid and yet carry a faire face before him as that adulterous woman who eateth and wipeth her mouth and saith I haue not committed iniquitie Salomon maketh it a note of a lewd wife to flatter with her words Though such a wife should performe all the duties named before yet would those all be nothing to God if they were done with a double heart and not in singlenesse of heart For as many outward imperfections are pardoned by God where sinceritie is so no outward actions are accepted of him though they seeme neuer so faire where there is no sinceritie §. 59. Of wiues cheerefulnesse in euery dutie III. Cheerefulnesse is more apparant then sinceritie and maketh subiection the more pleasing not only to God but also to man who by the effects thereof may easily discerne it For God as he doth himselfe all things willingly and cheerefully so he expecteth that his children should therein follow him and thereby shew themselues his children God loueth a cheerefull giuer not only a cheerefull giuer of almes but of all dutie to God and man For men it maketh them also much better accept any dutie when they obserue it to be done cheerefully this did euen rauish Dauid with ioy to see his people offer their gifts willingly vnto the Lord when an husband seeth his wife willingly and cheerefully performe her dutie it cannot but raise vp loue in him This cheerefulnesse is manifested by a ready quicke and speedy performance of her duty Sarahs readinesse to obey sheweth that what she did she did willingly That thus the Church subiecteth her selfe to Christ is euident by that which Dauid saith They shall be willing in the day of thy power Therefore as the Church is cheerefully subiect vnto Christ so let wiues be to their husbands §. 60. Of wiues sullen and forced obedience Contrary to this cheerefulnesse is the sullen disposition of some wiues who will indeed be subiect to their husbands and obey but with such a lowring and sowre countenance with such powting and muttering as they grieue their husbands more in the manner then they can be pleased with the thing it selfe that they doe herein they shew themselues like to a curst cow which hauing giuen a faire soape of milke casteth all downe with her heele and so verifie the prouerbe A good neuer a whit as neuer the better Such subiection is in truth no subiection it can neither be acceptable to God nor profitable to their husbands nor comfortable to their owne soules §. 61. Of wiues constancy in doing their dutie IIII. Constancy is a vertue which maketh all the rest perfect and setteth the crowne vpon them without which they are all nothing This is in those who after they haue begun well continue to doe well vnto the end and thereby reape the fruit of all It hath respect both to continuance without intermission and also to perseuerance without reuolting and giuing cleane ouer So as it is not enough to be subiect by starts and fits one while yeelding all good obedience another while stout and rebellious neither is it sufficient in former times to haue beene a good wife and after proue bad but there must be daily proceeding and holding on from time to time so long as husband and wife liue together This grace was in her of whom it is said She will doe him good and not euill all the daies of her life Such were all the holy wiues commended in Scripture among other particulars mention is made of the wife of Phinehas who on her death-bed shewed the reuerend good respect she bare to her husband though he were a wicked and lewd man This grace doth the Church adde to all her other vertues she in all parts of her subiection remaineth constant faithfull vnto the death whereby it commeth to passe that at length she receiueth the reward of her holy obedience which is full and perfect communion and fellowship with her spouse Christ Iesus in heauen In regard of her vnmoueable constancy it is said that the gates of hell shall neuer preuaile against her Therefore as the Church is constantly subiect vnto Christ so let wiues be to their husbands §. 62. Of wiues repenting their former goodnesse Contrary to this Constancie is first intermission of duty a returning to it and a leauing it off by turnes like one that is sicke of an ague sometimes well sometimes ill one while hot another while cold That sometimes ceasing taketh away all the vertue grace and glory from sometimes doing Besides it is twenty to one that through the corruption of nature that diuersitie and entercourse of fits at length will cease and end in the worse It is very likely that Michal was such an one for one while she shewed her selfe so full of respect to Dauid as for his sake she incurred the King her fathers displeasure another while in her heart she despised him and with her tongue taunted him Contrary also to the forenamed Constancy is Apostasie that is a cleane relinquishing of the former good course as if a wife repented her of her former good beginning Such an one is she that is said to for sake the guide of her youth and forget the couenant of her God For ought we reade to the contrary Iobs wife was such an one And such are many who in their younger yeares while their religious parents liued as Ioash while old good Iehoiada liued haue behaued themselues very well like good dutifull wiues but being grown to elder yeeres haue growne also so stout and rebellious as if they cleane repented themselues of their former good beginning This reuolt ariseth sometimes
affection whereof I speake is not a carnall sensuall beastly affection but such an one as may stand with Christian grauitie and so briety hauing relation to the soule of a mans wife as well as to her body grounded both on the neere coniunction of mariage and also on the inward qualities of his wife Thus farre of an husbands inward respect of his wife It followeth to speake of his outward cariage towards her §. 13. Of an husbands kinde acceptance of such things as his wife doth S. Peter giueth a generall rule for an husbands outward cariage to his wife which is that he dwell with her according to knowledge that is as a man able to order his cariage wisely to his owne honour and his wiues good that so she may haue iust cause to blesse God that euer she was ioyned to such an husband Out of this generall these two branches sprout forth 1. That an husband giue no iust offence to his wife 2. That wisely he order that offence which is giuen by her To auoid giuing of offence he must haue respect 1. To that which she doth as duty to him 2. To that which he doth as duty to her In regard of the former two things are requisite 1. That he kindly accept what she is willing and able to doe 2. That he wisely commend and reward what she doth well Thus hauing for orders sake laid downe these heads I will distinctly handle the seuerall points The first particular wherein an husband sheweth himselfe to be a man of knowledge in walking before his wife is by a kinde and respectiue acceptation of euery good duty which his wife performeth Abraham in testimony of his good acceptance of Sarahs pains in nursing her childe made a great feast when the childe was weined and Elkanah on a like respect gaue liberty to his wife to doe what seemed her best A great incouragement must this needs be vnto wiues to be subiect vnto their husbands in all things when they obserue no part of their subiection to be carelesly neglected but rather graciously accepted it quickens the spirit of a wife to thinke that her care and pains in pleasing her husband shall not be in vaine §. 14. Of husbands sleighting and reiecting their wiues goodnesse Contrary is their practise who thinking all which a wife doth to be but her duty take little or no notice thereof or if they cannot but take notice of it yet lightly regard it and sleightly passe it ouer This oftentimes maketh a wife euen repent the good she hath done as Dauid repented the seruice which he had done for Nabal The truth is that wiues ought rather to looke vnto God for his acceptation then vnto their husbands and though their husbands will take no notice or not regard what good thing they doe yet for conscience sake and for the Lords sake to doe their duty But yet notwithstanding considering our weaknesse and backwardnesse vnto euery duty it can not be denied but that an husbands sleight regarding of his wiues goodnesse is an occasion to make her weary thereof and that he doth as much as in him lieth to make her repent thereof But what may we say of such as scornfully reiect their wiues duty yea like them the worse for making conscience thereof and so cleane contrary to the rule of christianitie ouercome goodnesse with euill Surely they shew a very diabolicall spirit to be in them and cannot but minister much griefe and offence to their wiues and make that which they doe to be very irksome and tedious Fathers ought not to prouoke their children much lesse husbands their wiues §. 15. Of husbands courteous accepting their wiues reuerend cariage For the better conceiuing of this so needfull a point I will somewhat more particularly and distinctly applie the same to the seuerall duties of a wife which were drawne to two heads Reuerence Obedience For the first if a wife manifest her dutifull respect of her husband by any reuerend behauiour gesture or speech he ought to meet her as we say in the middest of the way and manifest his gratious acceptance thereof by some like courteous behauiour gesture and speech being seemely not foolish Obiect Thus shall an husband abase himselfe and disgrace his place Answ The courtesie which I speake of as it commeth from a superiour being a meere voluntary matter and a token of kindnesse and fauour is no abasement of himselfe but an aduancement of his inferiour a great grace to her no disgrace to him Abram was counted of the Hittits a Prince of God yet in communing with them he bowed vnto them It is noted as a commendable thing in Esau that though at that time he was his brothers superiour at least he tooke himselfe so to be yet obseruing how Iaakob reuerenced him bowing seuen times to the ground he ranne to meet him and embraced him and fell on his necke Most pertinent to the point is the example of King Ahashverosh who beholding Esthers reuerend standing before him held out his Scepter vnto her which in a King is great courtesie But to put the matter out of all question let the example of Christ noted in Salomons song be obserued and we shall finde his courtesie euery way answering the reuerence of his Spouse §. 15. Of husbands too great loftinesse Contrary is a loftie carriage of husbands to their wiues who ouerlooke all reuerence shewed by wiues no more respecting their wiues in this case then children or seruants or then Kings doe respect the reuerence of their subiects Oft haue I noted that there is a great difference betwixt a wife and all other inferiours in which respect all euidences of reuerence should much better be respected yet we know that Kings and Queenes will put out their hands to be kissed by their subiects when they kneele before them which is a token of courtesie how much more ought husbands to shew courtesie Vnworthy they are to be reuerenced of their wiues who too Lord-like ouerlooke them §. 16. Of husbands ready yeelding to their wiues humble suits Againe it being a token of reuerence in a wife humbly to make knowne her desire to her husband he ought to shew so much courtesie as readily to grant her desire this courtesie the forenamed Ahashuerosh afforded to Esther Dauid to Bathsheba Isaak to Rebekah Abraham to Sarah and many other husbands to their wiues Abraham shewed herein such respect to his wife that though the thing which she desired were grieuous to him yet he yeelded to his wife Obiect God first commanded him so to doe Answ This addeth the more force vnto the argument shewing that it is Gods expresse will that an husband should shew this kinde of courtesie to his wife Much more ought a man to doe at his wiues request then at any others whether friend childe or parent yea much more free
to the Church as Spouse Loue Doue with the like I doe not deny but that in the Song of Salomon and in other places of Scripture many titles are giuen and speeches vsed by Christ to the Church which are not meet to be vsed by husbands to their wiues because they are metaphoricall and hyperbolicall but yet in them all we may obserue tokens of amiablenesse kindnesse and mildnesse which is the end for which I haue alledged his example But contrary are such titles as on the one side set the wife in too high a place ouer her husband as Lady Mistresse Dame Mother c. And on the other side set her in too meane a rancke as woman wench c. And their Christian names contracted as Sal Mal Besse Nan. c. and names of kindred as Sister and Cosen and opprobrious names as stut drab queant and names more befitting beasts then wiues as Cole Browne Muggle c. Obiect These are titles of mildnesse kindnesse and much familiarity for husbands call their wiues by these names not when they are angry with them and displeased but ordinarily and vsually euen when they are best pleased Answ The mildnesse and familiarity which is required of an husband must be such as may stand with his authority and place of eminency as some of those names doe not and with that neere coniunction which is betwixt man and wife about all others as other doe not and with Christian grauity and discretion as other doe not Christians therefore must take heed that by their practise they iustifie not corrupt customes §. 25. Of an husbands manner of instructing his wife 2. To instruction the Apostle expresly annexeth meeknesse Instruct saith he with meekenesse those that oppose themselues If ministers must vse meekenesse when they instruct their people much more husbands when they instruct their wiues if in case of opposition meekenesse must not be laid aside then in no case at no time In this case to manifest meekenesse let these rules be obserued 1. Note the vnderstanding and capacity of thy wife and accordingly fit thine instructions if she be of meane capacity giue precept vpon precept line vpon line here a little and there a little a little at once oft giuen namely euery day something will arise in time to a great measure and so arise as together with knowledge of the thing taught loue of the person that teacheth will increase 2. Instruct her in priuate betwixt thy selfe and her that so her ignorance may not be blazed forth priuate actions passing betwixt man and wife are tokens of much kindnesse and familiarity 3. In the family so instruct children and seruants when she is present as she may learne knowledge thereby there can be no more meeke and gentle manner of instructing then by one to instruct another 4. Together with thy precepts mixe sweet and pithy perswasions which are testimonies of great loue Contrary is an harsh and rough manner of instructing when husbands goe about to thrust into their wiues heads as it were by violence deepe mysteries which they are not able to conceiue and yet if they conceiue not they will be angry with them and in anger giue them euill language and proclaime their ignorance before children seruants and strangers This harshnesse is ordinarily so fruitlesse and withall so exasperateth a womans spirit as I thinke he were better cleane omit the duty then doe it after such a manner §. 26. Of an husbands manner of commanding his wife any thing 3. The commandements which an husband giueth to his wife whether they be affirmatiue bidding her to doe something or negatiue forbidding her to doe this or that must all be seasoned with mildnesse For which end respect must be had to the matter and manner of his commandements In regard of the matter the things which he commandeth his wife to doe must be 1. Such as are indeed lawfull and honest 2. Such as she is perswaded to be so 3. Such as beseeme her place 4. Such as are of weight and moment And on the contrary the things which he forbiddeth must be 1. Such as are indeed vnlawfull to be done 2. Such as he can euidently proue vnto her to be vnlawfull 3. Such as are vnbeseeming her place 4. Such as will haue some euill and mischieuous effect if they be done 1. To command a thing vnlawfull or forbid a thing which ought to be done is to bring his owne authority into opposition with Gods in which case he bringeth his wife into this strait either to reiect Gods commandement or his How then can she thinke that her husband loueth her when he bringeth her into such snares and straits that she must needs fall into the gulfe of Gods displeasure or knocke against the rocke of her husbands offence Mildnesse is farre from such commandements 2. The like may be said of such things as to a wiues conscience seeme to be sinnefull if they be enioyned to her or her bounden duty if they be forbidden especially if she haue any ground for her conscience out of Gods word The conscience is subiect to God alone if it be forced it will be a fearefull horror and a very hell in that party whose conscience is forced She that doubteth is condemned if she doe that whereof she maketh doubt 1. Obiect In doubtfull matters the commanding power of a gouernour is sufficient warrant and ground to resolue the conscience of them that are vnder authority Answ 1. In things meerely doubtfull concerning which the partie in subiection hath not warrant out of Gods word one way or other it may be so But when the conscience doth not doubt and hang in suspence but is out of some ground taken from Gods word perswaded that that which is commanded is vnlawfull or that which is forbidden is a bounden dutie then to doe this or to leaue that vndone is to the party so perswaded a sinne and this is the doubting whereof the Apostle speaketh that condemneth a man In this case to vrge a wife to doe this or not to doe that is to vrge her to sinne which a milde spirit and louing heart will not doe 2. Though the husbands command be sufficient warrant to the wife and if he peremptorily presse her to this or that she ought to yeeld yet the loue and mildnesse required of an husband should make him so to tender her as to remit something of his power and when he seeth her conscience troubled about his command to releeue her conscience by for bearing to presse that which seemeth so burthensome to her A husband may sinne in pressing that too much vpon his wife which she vpon his pressing may without sinne yeeld vnto §. 27. Of an husbands wise carriage when his wife is erroneeusly scrupulous 2. Obiect What if an husband vpon his knowledge obserue his wife to be erroneously scrupulous and to misinterpret and misapply the word of
is as it were set on a racke if at least the trauell be sharpe and all their parts so stretched as a wonder it is they should euer recouer their health and strength againe or that they should hold out the brunt and not die with their trauell as Rachel and the wife of Phinchas and many in all ages haue done Surely among ordinary deliuerances I know none so neere a miracle none wherein the Almighty doth so euidently manifest his great power and good prouidence as in the safe deliuerie of women Besides the great pang of trauell women are also after their deliuerie subiect to many after-throws which are very painfull From all these paines and great weaknesse which befalleth women in childbed especially if they nurse their children men by reason of their sex are freed Now then to apply this point seeing women are brought to such paines and weaknesse in bringing forth those children which are the man 's as well as hers and he freed from all is it not very iust and meet that he should prouide all things needfull for her welfare ease and recouery of strength 3. Because the want of things needfull is at that time very dangerous dangerous to the health and life of the woman and childe also §. 51. Of neglecting wiues in their weaknesse Contrary to an husbands prouident care in generall are those vices which were taxed in the treatise of common duties as grudging at the charges bestowed on a wife Couetousnesse Prodigality and Idlenesse But contrary in particular to an husbands care for his wife in childbed is the inhumane and more then barbarous vnkindnesse of many husbands who no whit consider the weaknesse of their wiues in this case to helpe ease and comfort them but rather make their burden much more heauy For 1. Some through couetousnesse refuse before hand to afford meanes to their wife to prouide such things as are needfull for her selfe and child when the time commeth if their wife be desirous of a Midwife that requireth somwhat more charges then she that is next she shall haue none if she will not haue the next And as for a nurse to tend her they thinke their Maid will serue the turne wel enough they need not be at the charges to bring a Nurse into the house In regard of conuenient lodging some will not sticke to say Cannot my wife be brought to bed in a roome without a chimney as well as the Virgin Mary Why should my wife need more things then she did Yea further there be many that whē the time that their wife should be deliuered approacheth neere carie her from al her friends into a place where she is not knowne lest her friends should by importunity draw him to expend and lay out more vpon his wife then he is willing In the time while their wife is weake in childbed many are loath to allow them any other diet then is for themselues and children prouided in the house not considering that her stomach cannot be like theirs Many other such bitter fruits of vnkinde husbands arising from couetousnesse might be reckoned vp whereby husbands plainely shew that they loue their wealth better then their wiues they had rather lose them then part with that 2. Others through iealous suspicion forbeare not euen in the time of their wiues paine and weaknesse to vpbraid them with lightnesse and to say that the childe is none of theirs To lay this to a wiues charge vniustly is at any time a most shamefull and odious reproach but in the time of childebirth whether iust or vniust a thing too too spightfull and reuengefull Some wiues are so farre ouercome thereby especially in the time of their weaknesse as they are not able to beare it but euen faint and die vnder the reproach others more stout vow neuer to know their husbands againe Many like mischiefes follow on such vnkindnesse §. 52. Of an husbands prouiding for his wife according to his estate and abilitie In an husbands prouiding for the body of his wife respect must be had to the measure and to the manner The measure must extend to his ability for an husband ought to maintaine his wife in as good an estate and fashion as himselfe by mariage she is aduanced to as high an estate and dignity in relation to others as he is and for her owne vse she is made a partner of all his goods and accordingly ought to partake thereof For the manner he must suffer her if at least he obserue her to haue any competent discretion to order such things as are needfull for her selfe according to her best liking as Elkanah in another case said to his wife Doe what seemeth thee best Both in the measure and in the manner of prouiding there must be a difference put betwixt a wife and seruants or children These may haue their portions of meat apparrell and like necessaries proportioned out and stinted vnto them which is vnmeet to be done to a wife Neither is it needfull that so plentifull a prouision be made for them as for her §. 53. Of an husbands nigardlynesse to his wife Contrary is an husbands nigardly dealing with his wife when the allowance she hath is both farre vnder his estate and also so giuen her by little and little as if she were a childe Many husbands make their wiues drudge at home fare hardly and goe meanly who are themselues braue in apparrell frolicke in their feasting abroad and so exceed their wiues as they are ashamed to be seene in company with them They who marry their maids or others of meaner ranke then themselues oft so deale with them esteeming them but as seruants and meane persons though they be their wiues But it hath beene before shewed that wiues by marriage are aduanced to their husbands dignity how meane soeuer they were before §. 54. Of husbands allowing their wiues to bestow on others as they see good occasion So farre ought the prouident care of an husband for his wife to extend as she may haue beside things needfull to her selfe to bestow on such as it is requisite for her to giue vnto as namely on children and seruants in the house and others also out of the house For so much is noted in Salomons description of a good wife She giueth meat to her houshold and a portion to her maidens all her houshold is clothed with scarlet namely by her ordering and disposing the matter Her children rise vp and call her blessed as for her generall cariage in the family so for her particular fauours bestowed on themselues As for others out of the house it is also noted that she stretcheth out her hand to the poore and reacheth forth her hands to the needie These things she did by virtue of that power and liberty which her husband gaue her as appeareth by two points there noted 1. In that before any mention is made of those things
honour against them yea though they be children of a former wife §. 59. Of an husbands maintaining his wife against children of a former venter and seruants Obiect Mothers in law often proue vnkinde and vniust stepmothers and deale vnmercifully with their husbands children must an husband in such cases assist his wife against his children Answ The protection I speake of is in case a wife be wronged then her husband is to doe what he can to right her as we speake But if she be the wrong-doer he may by no meanes boulster her vp against his children and so make their wrong the greater Yet so far ought he to respect his wife as by all the faire meanes he can to labour to pacific her minde and turne her heart towards them and if he obserue her heart to be cleane alienated from them then to put them forth to be brought vp in some other place and so to take away from her the obiect of her displeasure that he and she may liue more quietly together For if a man must forsake father and mother he must also forsake children and cleaue to his wife Peace and vnitie betwixt man and wife must of all other be kept inuiolable Though thou cast away all nothing can happen more troublesome to thee then not to haue a quiet wife at home Thou canst finde no sinne more grieuous then to haue contention with a wife If a wife must be maintained against the stubbornnesse of children much more against the insolencie of seruants for which purpose the example of Abraham is recorded whose seruant might haue a priuiledge aboue others because he had made her his bedfellow yet when she waxed insolent against her mistresse first he put her into her mistresses hand to doe to her as it pleased her and afterwards he cast her out of his house §. 60. Of neglecting to maintaine their wiues Contrary is a dissolute carelesnesse of husbands who care no more to helpe and succour their wiues then any other 1. Some more feare to offend their wiues then they care to doe them good and in that respect they let any sort of people come to their wiues that are welcome to them If Magistrates in a Common-wealth shall answer for suffering seducers to come into their dominions to deceiue their people much more shall husbands answer for suffering them to come and deceiue their wiues 1. Because they haue a greater charge ouer their wiues then Magistrates ouer their people 2. Because wiues ought to be dearer to husbands then people to Magistrates 3. Because they may sooner espie them in their house then Magistrates in the Common-wealth 4. Because they may be much more easily kept out of an house then out of a Common-wealth or a Citie 2. Others care not whither their wiues wander and if they doe goe out of their house they shall neuer be sought after by their husbands though this may be a iust punishment on wandring wiues yet is it not iust for husbands so to deale with them If Christ our husband should so deale with vs we should soone be lost for wee oft goe astray like wandring sheepe but hee is that good shepherd who seeketh after the lost sheepe vntill he finde it 3. No maruell then that many husbands are no more affected with the ill reports and rumors raised against their wiues when they so little regard who come to them or whither they goe Assuredly the discredit of a wife will turne to the mans dishonour for as a vertuous wife is a crowne to her husband so by the rule of contraries an infamous wife is a shame to her husband If therefore not for his wiues sake yet for his owne sake a man ought not too carelesly passe ouer the ill reports which are raised against his wife 4. There be such vnkinde husbands as are moued with no ill vsage done vnto their wiues nor will heare any complaint that they make vnto them yea if they see them misused they will either not seeme to see it or but smile at it and so goe their way and suffer their wiues to right themselues as well as they can As this beseemeth not any Christian to suffer his neighbour to be wronged for it is noted as a commendable matter in Moses that when he saw two Hebrewes striuing together he tooke his part that had wrong done to him and reproued the other so much â—esse an husband to whose safe-guard his wife is committed Nature teacheth vs that the head is as much affected with a wrong â—one to the bodie as to it selfe so ought an husband 5. As the wrong which is done by those who are in subiection â—n the house vnder the wife is greater then that which is done by â—trangers so is the husbands fault the greater in suffering it for â—e hath more power ouer them in his house then ouer others What then may we thinke of such as either by their conniuence â—r by taking part against their wiues suffer both children and serâ—ants to insult ouer them Assuredly those husbands themselues will finde some smacke of the bitter and euill fruit thereof â—â—d that not only by that great discontent which their wiues must â—eeds take thereat but also by that contempt which will follow on their owne persons both by their wiues who cannot thinke them meet heads to gouerne others but also by their children and seruants who thereby will take occasion to waxe proud and presumptuous against him By despising the weaker men grow by little and little to despise the stronger This men of wisdome and experience well know whereupon in Common-wealths and Policies gouerned by wise men the authoritie of inferiour Magistrates is vpheld and maintained superiour Magistrates will not suffer them who are in authoritie vnder them to be despised for it is well knowne that it tends not to the honour and ease only but to the safetie also of the supreme Magistrate to haue the power and authoritie of inferiour Magistrates respected and not trampled vnder feet It argueth therefore both want of affection and of discretion and vnderstanding in husbands to suffer childe seruant or any other in the house to insult ouer their wiues who are ioynt gouernours with them ouer the house §. 61. Of an husbands first beginning to loue his wife The generall matter together with the particular kindes of husbands duties being thus farre handled The manner also of performing them is to be deliuered To instruct an husband in the manner of performing his duties to his wife the Apostle laieth downe two patternes 1. Christ vers 25. 2. Our selues vers 28.  As Christ loueth his Church and as we loue our selues so must men loue their wiues That we may the better follow these patternes we must distinctly note how Christ loueth his Church and how we loue our selues The loue of Christ to his Church is commended vnto vs in six seuerall
their speech not only themâ—efore â—efore their faces but also of them behinde their backes must 〈◊〉 so framed both for matter and manner when they haue any â—â—casion to fall into speech of their parents as all that heare â—â—em may note them to beare a reuererend respect to their â—â—rents As a generall direction for the better performing of this â—â—ty let children speake nothing of their parents that they would be loath should come to their parents eare More particularly let them speake of those things which most tend to their commendation that so as Christ said of his father they may honour their parents Let other things be buried in silence so much as in them lieth And if others speake of matters disgracefull to their parents let them interpret in the better sense things doubtfull and so farre as they may extenuate things euident and sharply reproue them that slander their parents This is that blessing which children owe to their parents for neglecting whereof the wiseman taxeth children saying There is a generation that doth not blesse their mother Contrary to that kinde of blessing is discouering of parents infirmities noted in cursed Cham and broaching vntruths of them noted in impious Absolom and mocking and cursing them expresly condemned The reward whereof is by Gods law death yea a shamefull and ignominious death for the Rauens of the valley shall plucke out his eies and the young Eagles shall eat it which phrase setteth forth the end of a notorious malefactor that is hanged §. 8. Of a childs reuerend cariage to his parent As the speech so the cariage of children towards their parents must be seasoned with reuerence for 1. This is a fruit and proofe of filiall feare as well as that 2. Of the two this is the surer euidence for actions are better signes of the disposition of the heart then words 3. Faire words ioyned with contrary deeds cannot but be accounted meerely complementall and hypocriticall 4. Where there is a contrariety betwixt words and deeds the one will be a witnesse against the other and that mans condemnation the greater Wherefore let all reuerence be manifested in childrens behauiour to their parents and that in these and such like instances 1. If a parent be comming to a childe and the childe obserue it let him haste to meet his parent so did Ioseph to his father and Salomon to his mother Which two examples are the rather to be noted because both were in eminent place one a great gouernour the other a king 2. Let such child-like obeisance be performed as becommeth the age and sex either in going to remaining before or going from a parent as vncouering the head bending the knee bowing the body standing vp with the like The two forenamed eminent persons Ioseph and Solomon bowed the one to his father the other to his mother 3. Let the countenance and gesture of the body be so soberly and modestly ordered in the presence of the parent as may argue due respect 4. Let the vpper place and hand be giuen to parents and if occasionally a childe be aboue his parent let him come below him For that is a manifest token of inferiority and subiection What maketh men to striue for the vpper hand but because they would be accounted better then those with whom they striue But that ought not to be the minde of children to their parents Quest What if children be in estate more wealthy or honourable then their parents are they then to giue the hand to them Answ No honour is comparable to the dignity of fatherhood it giueth a greater eminency to the parent ouer his childe then any other honour can to the childe ouer his parent I grant that a childe may by some office and outward dignity be so aduanced aboue his father as other men may more honour and reuerence the childe and giue the vpper place to him and for order sake the childe may and ought to take it in company but when they are alone the childe must rather reuerence the father 5. According to the custome of the time and place wherein they liue let children aske their parents blessing §. 9. Of childrens asking their parents blessing whether it be lawfull or no. Some doubt is made of this duty both in regard of the thing it selfe and also of the gesture of kneeling vsed in the performance thereof I will therefore distinctly proue both For the thing it is noted of Iaakob that he carried sauory meat to his father that he might blesse him and of Ioseph that he went to his father and carried his two sonnes with him that his father might blesse both him and them for which end the twelue sonnes of Iaakob assembled to their father Obiect These were extraordinary examples the Patriarchs were indued with the spirit of prophesie whereby they reuealed to their children what their estate should be in the times to come for knowledge whereof their children came to them 1. Answ Their blessings were more then predictions of things to come they were confirmations and assurances to the children that God would indeed performe that blessing which their parents had pronounced For they sustained a double person the person of a Prophet and of a father as prophets they foretold things to come as fathers they obtained the blessings pronounced and an assurance thereof to their children and that by faith and praier 2. Answ Though all parents cannot with such an extraordinary spirit assure vnto their children any distinct particular blessing yet the faithfull praier of parents is an especiall and ordinary meanes to obtaine a blessing from God vpon their children and that because of Gods promise which extends it selfe not only to fathfull parents but also to their seed Wherefore as the children of the patriarches came to their fathers to be assured of some extraordinary blessing so may other children goe to their parents as a meanes to obtaine an ordinary blessing It is noted of Eliah that by an extraordinary spirit in praier he obtained extraordinary matters Yet the Apostle setteth forth that example to all Christians as a motiue to stirre them vp in faith to pray for ordinary blessings But for further clearing of this point note the phrase vsed in the fift commandement as a reason to moue children to honour their parents this it is word for word That they may prolong thy daies c. how can parents prolong their childrens daies but by begging that blessing of God The praiers then of parents are a great blessing to children and children ought to seeke this blessing of their parents Obiect If parents be wicked their praier is abomination what blessing then can children looke for from wicked parents Answ Though God heare not wicked parents in loue and goodnesse to themselues yet for the good of their children he may and will
they are vnder their parents gouernment For that time the consent of parents is not only meet but necessarie and that for these reasons 1. Children are as the goods of their parents wholly in their power to be ordered and disposed by them On this ground Satan hauing all that Iob had put into his hand tooke libertie ouer his children as well as ouer his goods and chattell 2. Children while they be vnder gouernment euen the eldest that are heires differ nothing from seruants 3. By Gods law giuen to the Iewes parents had power to sell their children 4. Parents had power to disanull such things as children had done Instance the case of a vow made to God which was one of the most inuiolable things that one could doe Contrary is the opinion and practise of many who hold parents consent at the most but a matter of conueniencie that it is good if children will to haue their parents consent if they haue it not the matter is not great their contracts or other things which they doe are as firme and good without as with their consents If this were so wherein is the authoritie of a parent more then of a wise experienced friend It is meet and good to haue such an ones consent But that the power of parents and dutie of children in this point may the better be seene I will exemplifie it in fiue particular cases 1. Entring into a calling 2. Making mariage 3. Disposing of goods 4. Ordering apparell 5. Making vowes §. 13. Of consent of parents for childrens entring into a calling I. That children ought to haue the consent of their parents in making choise of their calling and not place themselues as they please is euident by the approued practise of the Saints recorded in Gods word Iaakob was sent by his parents to Laban to be educated vnder him Dauid was appointed by his father to keep sheepe when Saul was desirous to haue Dauid attend vpon him he sent to Ishai Dauids father for him In that Ishai was â—o carefull to send prouision to his three eldest sons that followed Saul to the warre we may well thinke that they went to the warre with his consent It is noted of Ionadab that he appointed his â—onnes to dwell in tents and that accordingly they did so and are â—ommended and rewarded for this their obedience It is collected â—oth by ancient and later Diuines that our Lord Iesus Christ 〈◊〉 his younger yeeres before he began to exercise his publike ministerie occupied himselfe in his fathers trade and that this was â—â—e thing wherein he manifested his subiection to his parents This collection is made by comparing Luk. 2. 51. where his subâ—â—ction is noted with Mar. 6. 3. and Mat. 13. 55. where he is calâ—â—d the Carpenter and the Carpenters sonne Equitie requireth that parents should haue an hand in placing â—â—th their children because they brought them forth into the â—orld and brought them vp with much care paines and charge â—hile they were young and till they were fit for a calling Besides Godhath laid it as a charge vpon parents that they â—ould see their children well trained vp great reason therefore at parents consent be had in setting forth children to a calling §. 14. Of the vnlawfulnesse of childrens entring into religious orders without consent of parents Contrary is the opinion of Papists who say that children may â—er into religious orders not only without consent but also aâ—â—â—nst the minde and good like of their parents Whereby they 〈◊〉 not only patronize apparent disobedience in children against the expresse word of God but also disable children from helping their parents in case of necessitie for both which Christ rebuked the Scribes and Pharisies in a like case Obiect Papists doe grant that if parents be in such necessitie as they cannot liue without their childrens helpe their children may not by entring into any religious order forsake their parents For they are bound by the law of God to succour their parents Answ 1. This caution hath beene extorted from them by euidence of argument taken from Gods word and pressed by their aduersaries 2. It toucheth not the principall argument taken from Gods precept which they make of none effect by this their tradition 3. Though parents be not at that present when children first enter into their religious order in such extreme need yet they may be afterwards But after that children are once entred they hold it vtterly vnlawfull that children for any necessitie of the parent should attend vpon them for their succour Obiect Children being entred into religious orders may helpe them as becommeth religious persons by their praiers to God Answ 1. This is iumpe the Pharisies Corban whereof Christ maketh mention Mar. 7. 11. and whereby he notably discouereth the hypocrisie of the Pharisies who made pretence of religion an hinderance to that obedience which God required of children 2. To pray for that which a man indeuoureth not to doe when he may doe it is a plaine mocking of God The arguments which they alledge for confirmation of their erroneous opinion are taken from extraordinary examples or from mysticall resemblances as 1. Abrahams leauing his fathers house 2. Leuies speech of his father and mother who said I haue not seene him 3. The aduice giuen to the royall Queene Forget thy fathers house 4. The triall of our loue of Christ by louing him more then father or mother 5. Christs forbidding one that followed him to goe and burie his father Answ 1. For Abrahams example 1. it cannot be proued that he left his fathers house without the consent of his father 2. He was then maried and so of another house 3. He had an expresse particular charge of God to leaue his fathers house euen as he had to sacrifice his sonne Except the like charge can be shewed his example maketh nothing to the purpose 2. For Leuies speech 1. It was noted by Moses in relation to a particular zealous fact of the Leuites in executing the vengeance of the Lord and so to be reckoned among such extraordinary things as are not exemplary 2. That which moued the Leuites to make no difference betwixt their parents and others was the Lords cause their parents and kindred as well as others had notoriously sinned against God and in that respect the Leuites took no notice of them But they are not such parents which Papists teach children to forsake but any parents Now what consequence is this Some children haue been Gods Ministers in executing iust punishment on their wicked parents therefore children may enter into such places as shall exempt them from helping any parents though well deseruing 3. The Leuites had an expresse charge for that which they did but that which Papists inferre from their example doth make the commandement of God of none effect 3. For
dutie lieth principally vpon the mother who so soone as she perceiueth a childe to be conceiued in her wombe ought to haue an especiall care thereof that so much as in her lieth the childe may be safely brought forth The heathen Philosophen by light of nature obserued this to be a dutie and prescribed it to mothers A mother then must haue a tender care ouer her selfe when shee is with childe for the childe being lodged in her and receiuing nourishment from her as plants from the earth her well-being tendeth much to the good and safetie of the childe but the hurt that commeth to her maketh the childe the worse if it be not a meanes to destroy it Why was the charge of abstaining from wine strong drinke and vncleane things giuen to Manoahs wife but because of the childe which she conceiued In this case there is a double bond to make mothers carefull of themselues 1. Their owne 2. Their childs good Husbands also in this case must be very tender ouer their wiues and helpfull to them in all things needfull both in regard of that dutie which they owe to their wiues and also of that they owe to their children Why was Manoah so desirous to heare himselfe the forenamed direction which the Angell gaue to his wife and why did the Angell againe repeat it to him but to shew it belonged to him to see her obserue it They who through violence of passion whether of griefe or anger or through violent motion of the bodie as by dancing striuing running galloping on horsebacke or the like or through distemper of the bodie by eating things hurtfull by eating too much by too much abstinence by too much bashfulnesse in concealing their desires and longings as we speake cause any abortion or miscariage fall into the offence contrary to the forenamed dutie If women were perswaded that in conscience they are bound to the forenamed dutie they would I thinke be more carefull of themselues For if through their default they themselues or their childe miscarry they make themselues guilty of that miscariage if both miscarry they make themselues guiltie of the bloud of both at least in the court of conscience before God But they who purposely take things to make away their children in their wombe are in farre higher degree guiltie of bloud yea euen of wilfull murther For that which hath receiued a soule formed in it by God if it be vniustly cast away shall be reuenged So farre forth as husbands are carelesse of their wiues being with childe denying them things needfull they are accessarie to the hurt which the woman or childe taketh guiltie of the sin and liable to the iudgement §. 10. Of prouiding things needfull for the childe so soone as it is borne and of crueltie contrary thereunto The next degree of a childs infancie is while it is in the swadling bands and remaineth a sucking childe In this also the care especially lieth vpon the mother yet so as the father must afford what helpe he can The first dutie here required is that sufficient prouision of all things needfull for a childe in that weaknesse be before hand prouided What the particulars be women better know then I can expresse For me it is sufficient to lay downe the dutie in generall which is commended vnto vs in that worthy patterne of the Virgin Marie who though she were very poore and forced to trauell farre and brought to bed in a strange place where she was so little respected as she was not afforded a place meet for a woman in her case but was faine to content her selfe with a stable in a common Inne yet she prouided for her childe For it is said She wrapped him in swadling clothes Luk 2. 7. Contrary is the practise of such lewd and vnnaturall women as leaue their new-borne children vnder stalls at mens doores in Church porches yea many times in open field It is noted as a point of vnnaturalnesse in the Ostrich to leaue her eggs in the earth and in the dust in which respect she is said to be hardned against her young ones as though they were not hers Iob 39. 14 16. Much more hardned are the foresaid lewd women The Eagle is counted an vnnaturall bird because she thrusteth her young ones which she hath brought forth out of her nest Are not then such mothers much more vnnaturall They oft lay their children forth in publike places for others to shew that mercy which they themselues haue not The Ciuill Law iudgeth this to be a kinde of further §. 11. Of giuing sucke to children Among other needfull things the milke of the breast is fit for â—oung babes and with it they are to be nourished I thinke none â—oubt of the equitie of this It hath in all ages and in all counâ—ies beene accounted the bestfood that can be for young babes The metaphor which S. Peter vseth taken from young infants in these words As new-borne babes desire the sincere milke of the â—ord confirmeth as much So doth also the desire which such â—nfants haue to the milke of the breasts and the abilitie and â—omptnesse which is in them to sucke and Gods prouidence in â—using a womans breasts to yeeld forth such milke and the constant manner of nourishing little infants after this manner commended in the Scriptures and to conclude the naturall instinct which many vnreasonable creatures haue thus to nourish their young ones They who on meere curiositie where no vrgent necessitie requireth try whether their children may not as birds be nourished without sucke offend contrary to this dutie and reiect that meanes which God hath ordained as the best and so oppose their shallow wit to his vnsearchable wisdome §. 12. Of mothers giuing sucke to their owne children Of nourishing children with brest-milke there is no great question therefore I haue with a touch passed it ouer The chiefest question of doubt is concerning the partie who is bound to this dutie namely whether the mother be bound to doe it her selfe or no. Many strong arguments there be to presse it vpon the consciences of mothers and to shew that so farre as they are able they are bound to giue sucke to their owne children Some are taken from the light of Gods word and some from the light of nature Gods word doth in many places by iust consequence imply that it is a bounden dutie in other places it doth expresly commend it by the practise of holy women and againe in other places it taketh it for a granted truth and ruled case not to be denied 1. The consequences whereby the word implieth this dutie are these 1. In the blessing giuen to Ioseph thus speaketh old Iaakob God shall blesse thee with the blessing of the breasts and of the wombe By the blessing of the wombe what can be meant but children By the blessing of the breasts what but milke whereby those children are nourished As
if he had said I will blesse thee with such women as shall both beare thee children and also giue sucke to them which they beare The consequence then is this As it is a blessing to haue children of a true lawfull wife so to haue those children nursed of the same wife their mother Obiect They haue the blessing of breasts that haue other women to nurse their children Answ By the same reason it may be said they haue the blessing of the wombe who haue strange women to beare them children But the ioyning of these two branches of blessing together sheweth that both must be taken in the same kinde so that as the blessing of the wombe is to haue children of a mans wife so the blessing of the breasts is to haue them nursed of his wife If it be a blessing for the woman which beareth the childe to giue it sucke then mothers are bound to performe this dutie 2. It is denounced as a curse that women shall haue a barren wombe and drie breasts If it be a curse for women to haue drie breasts then may not women wittingly make them drie which all mothers doe that giue not sucke to their children 3. Manoahs wife being promised to beare a sonne had this charge giuen her Drinke no wine nor strong drinke c. those things were especially hurtfull for her milke It is therefore implied thereby that she should so order her diet as she might well nurse her childe and haue good milke for him 4. God by his good prouidence brought it to passe that the mother of Moses though she were forced to cast out her childe should nurse her owne childe Yea the mother her selfe was desirous to doe it and therefore appointed her daughter â—o watch who should take it vp These two circumstances â—mplie that it appertaineth to a mother to nurse her children 5. The Apostle layeth this downe as a note of a good woman who in her place hath beene carefull to doe her dutie â—nd thereupon fit to doe seruice in Gods Church If she haue â—ourished her children or word for word If she haue fed her children Now the proper food for young babes is breast-milk which by the Apostles rule the mother must giue 6. The same Apostle commandeth mothers to loue their children How can a mother better expresse her loue to her â—oung babe then by letting it sucke of her owne breasts As his is a testimony of loue so it is a meanes of preseruing and increasing loue for daily experience sheweth that mothers â—ue those children best to whom they themselues giue sucke Summe these seuerall consequences together and we â—all finde the dutie in question to be very strongly inforced hereby 1. As a blessing it is promised that mothers shall giue sucke to the children that they beare 2. As a curse it is threatned that women shall not be able to giue sucke 3. An Angell gaue direction to a mother so to carrie her selfe as she might haue store of good milke for the childe which she should beare 4. God by his speciall prouidence manifested that the proper mother was the best nurse for a childe 5. It is the note of a good woman to performe this part of her particular calling namely to nurse her owne childe 6. Women ought to doe all the best duties of loue that they can to their children Therefore mothers ought to nurse their owne children II. Some of the most worthy patternes in whose example this dutie is commended to mothers are these 1. Sarah gaue sucke to Isaak This example is to be noted especially of the greater sort as rich mens wiues honourable mens wiues and the like For Sarah was an honourable woman a princesse a rich mans wife a beautifull woman aged and well growne in yeeres and a mistresse of a family Are not these excuses pretended by many mothers for not nursing children themselues 2. The virgin Mary gaue sucke to Iesus This example is to be noted especially of the meaner sort for the virgin Man was young poore persecuted forced to remoue and flie with her childe from countrie to countrie Are not these excuses pretended by other mothers These two patternes doe not only commend the duty but also strippe all mothers that are negligent therein of all excuse To these may be added the examples of Annah of Dauids mother and of many others What if also I adde the example of that true naturall affectionate mother who stood before Salomons throne to plead for her childe she thus saith of her selfe I arose to giue my sonne sucke c. If this had not beene a good motherly dutie she would not then and there haue pleaded it III. The places of Scripture which take this dutie for a matter granted and for a ruled case are such as these 1. Where Sarah saith Who would haue said to Abram that Sarah should haue giuen children sucke In this phrase she setteth forth Gods blessing in giuing Abram a sonne by her Now in that she expresseth the blessing vnder this phrase of giuing sucke she taketh it for grant that the mother which beareth children must giue them sucke 2. Where Dauid saith thou diddest make me hope vpon my mothers breasts he doth not onely imply that his mother gaue him sucke but by the phrase maketh it a ruled case that the childe which suckes must hang vpon the mothers breast 3. Where Salomon saith O that thou wert as my brother that sucked the breasts of my mother he taketh if also for grant that brothers and sisters as they come out of the same wombe so they should sucke the same breasts euen the breasts of her out of whose wombe they came their owne mothers breasts 4. Where the woman said to Christ Blessed is the wombe that bare thee and the paps which thou hast sucked she taketh it for grant as it was an vsuall practise in those daies that the â—aps of that woman whose wombe beare him gaue him â—ucke These arguments we haue from the light of Gods word other we may haue from Gods workes and the light of nature as 1. God hath giuen to women two breasts fit to containe â—nd hold milke and nipples vnto them fit to haue milke drawne from them Why are these thus giuen to lay them â—rth for ostentation There is no warrant for that in all Gods â—ord They are directly giuen for the childs food that commeth out of the wombe for till the childe be borne there is â—o milke in the breasts anon after it is borne milke ordinariâ—â— floweth into the breasts yea a great part of the meat which â—â—ey eat turneth into milke They make this admirable worke â—f Gods prouidence to be in vaine that drie vp this spring â—â—d suffer not their children to partake of the benefit of it 2. That nourishment whereon the childe fed in the moâ—â—ers wombe and whereby it was there sustained turneth into milke
and commeth into the breasts when the childe commeth out of the wombe Whence we may gather that of all womens milke that womans milke is fittest for the childe out of whose wombe the childe came 3. Together with the milke passeth some smacke of the affection and disposition of the mother which maketh mothers to loue such children best as they haue giuen sucke vnto yea and oft times such children as haue sucked their mothers breasts loue their mothers best yea we may obserue many who haue sucked others milke to loue those nurses all the daies of their life 4. Other things are nourished by the same that they are bred The earth out of which plants grow ministreth nourishment to the said plants trees that bring forth fruit yeeld sap to that fruit whereby it groweth to ripenesse vnreasonable creatures and among them the most sauage wilde beasts as Tigers and Dragons yea sea-monsters giue sucke to their young ones whereupon the Prophet saith of women that giue not sucke to their Children that they are more cruell then those sea-monsters Like the Ostriches in the wildernesse for the cruell Ostrich and the hatefull Cucco are the two kinde of creatures which are noted to leaue their young ones for others to nourish the Ostrich leaueth her eggs in the dust the Cucco leaueth hers in other birds nests Other creatures if nature afford them not milke and dugges as to birds it doth not feed their young ones other waies yet by themselues 5. Shall I adde another argument which daily experience confirmeth namely Gods blessing vpon this motherly dutie commonly such children as are nursed by their mothers prosper best Mothers are most tender ouer them and cannot indure to let them lie crying out without taking them vp and stilling them as nurses will let them crie and crie againe if they be about any businesse of their owne For who are commonly chosen to be nurses euen poore countrie women which haue much worke to doe and little helpe and so are forced to let the childe lie and crie many times till it burst againe Children nursed by their mothers are for the most part more cleanly and neatly brought vp freer from diseases not so many die I am sure not so many through negligence cast away The number of nurse children that die euery yeere is very great It hath beene obserued in many countrie villages that the most part that from time to time die there are nurse children Are not mothers that might haue nursed their owne children if they would accessary to the death of those that are cast away by the nurses negligence On these and other like reasons heathen women and very sauages haue in all ages beene moued to nurse their owne children and some heathen Philosophers haue vrged and pressed the necessitie of this dutie Neuer was it more neglected then among those that beare the name of Christians Let mothers know of what ranke or degree so euer they be that out of the case of necessitie they haue no warrant to put forth their children to others to nurse We read not in all the Scripture of any holy women that euer did it §. 13. Of the obiections for putting children forth to nurse Obiect Many nurses are mentioned in Scripture as Rebekahs nurse Mephibosheths nurse Ioash his nurse and others 1. Answ Such nurses mentioned in Scripture were commonly drie nurses Rebekahs nurse went with her before she was maried how can it be thought that she was a milch nurse Could they tell when Rebekah should haue a childe or when he had one that Deborah the nurse there mentioned should haue milke for her It is said that Naomi became nurse to Ruths â—hilde now Naomi was old long before this she was past â—hild-bearing without an husband for many yeeres how then was it possible that she should giue sucke She was therefore a â—rie nurse as other nurses mentioned in Scripture 2. Answ The mothers of those children which are said to â—aue nurses if those nurses were milch-nurses might be â—ead or if liuing not able to giue sucke for want of milke â—ipple or for some other like defect or if able sinne in putting forth their children 3. Answ Though it be said that there were nurses yet is no where said that a mother put forth her childe to sucke 2. Obiect Pharohs daughter put forth the childe which she â—â—oke for her owne to nurse Answ She bare not this childe nor was the naturall mother of it so as this is nothing to the purpose Yea it maketh against the obiectors in that the true mother of this childe nursed it 3. Obiect The metaphor taken from nurses is oft vsed and applied to God and to Gods ministers 1. Answ The vsing of a thing by way of comparison and resemblance doth not simply iustifie it instance the parable of the vniust steward and of a theefe 2. Answ The metaphor may be taken from a drie nurse as well as a milch nurse for the comparisons are not vsed of giuing sucke but of bearing and carrying in armes as drie nurses vse to carry children 3. Answ The metaphors are most fitly taken from mothers that are nurses to their owne children 4. Obiect Many mothers haue not such skill in giuing sucke as nurses haue Answ Let them learne seeing it is their dutie 5. Obiect Mothers that are of great wealth and high place cannot endure the paine of nursing nor take the paines in handling young children as they must be handled 1. Answ The greatest that be must set themselues to doe that duty which God requireth at their hands though it be with paine and paines Note Sarahs example before recorded 2. Answ By this it appeareth that if other women could beare their children in the wombe nine moneths and endure the paine of trauell for them they would hire them to doe it But seeing they doe the one namely beare and bring forth their owne children with hard labour why should they not doe the other If they say there is an vnauoidable necessity of bearing and bringing forth their children I answer that conscience ought to moue them to nurse those children which necessity forceth them to bring forth God by this latter oâ— nursing children maketh triall of women whether they will for conscience sake doe that duty which they may if they will put off But because God knew that many will doe no more then necessity laieth vpon them he hath made it a matter oâ— impossibility for women to beare and bring forth their children by another 3. Answ If women would with cheerefulnesse set themselues to performe this duty much of the supposed paine and paines would be lessened 4. Answ Though they put not forth their children to nurse they may for their ease entertaine a nurse so they giue sucke themselues 6. Obiect A mother that hath a trade or that hath the care of an house will neglect much businesse by nursing her
childe and her husband will saue more by giuing halfe a crowne a weeke to a nurse then if his wife gaue the childe sucke Answ No outward businesse appertaining to a mother can be more acceptable to God then the nursing of her childe this is the most proper worke of her speciall calling therefore all other businesses must giue place to this and this must not be left for any other businesse As for the husbands sauing by putting the childe forth to nurse no gaine may giue a dispensation against a bounden duty 7. Obiect It will breake tender faire women and make them looke old too soone 1. Answ Gods ordinance must not giue place to womens â—â—icenesse Sarah was faire and old The Virgin Mary was faire and young 2. Answ Drying vp a womans milke will more breake her then her childes sucking of it for it is a meanes both of better health and also of greater strength as to beare children so to giue them sucke Barren women and bearing women which put forth their children to sucke are most subiect to sicknesse and weaknesse The drawing forth of a womans milke by her childe is a meanes to get and preserue a good stomach which is a great preseruatiue of good health 8. Obiect Husbands are disturbed in the night time and hindred of their sleepe by their wiues giuing sucke to their children 1. Answ By this reason neither mothers nor other nurses which haue husbands should giue sucke to children 2. Answ Seeing children come from the loines of the father as well as out of the wombe of the mother they must be content to endure some disturbance as well as their wiues and so much the rather that they may the more pitty their wiues and afford vnto them what helpe they can 9. Obiect Many husbands will not suffer their wiues to nurse their children themselues Answ Because it is a bounden duty wiues must vse all the meanes they can by themselues or others to perswade their husbands to let them performe it they must take heede that they make not this a pretext to couer their owne sloth and lothnesse to this duty they may not make themselues accessarie to their husbands fault by prouiding a nurse and sending the childe away themselues if their husbands will stand vpon their authority and be perswaded by no meanes to the contrary they must be meere patients in suffering the childe to be taken away 10. Obiect Many poore women maintaine their house by nursing other folkes children Answ If they were not that way imployed they might take paines in some other thing But the gaine of one may not make another neglect her duty 11. Obiect Some mothers cannot giue sucke they haue no milke others cannot very well in that they haue no nipples or they haue sore breasts or are sickly or it may be that they haue such a disease as the childe if it should sucke of their milke would draw to it selfe and so the sucking might proue very dangerous to the childe 1. Answ God requireth no impossibilities wherefore in propounding the duty I put in this caution so far as they are able 2. God requireth mercie and not sacrifice if therefore in truth it be so that the mothers giuing sucke to the childe will be dangerous to her selfe or to the childe she may and ought to forbeare for giuing sucke is but as sacrifice to preuenting of danger which is mercie But women must take heed that they pretend not inability and danger without iust cause Some are themselues the cause of wanting milke because they will not let it be drawne downe or because they will not vse meanes for meanes there are to get and increase milke There are meanes also to raise nipples where the breasts are very flat Refusing to giue sucke many times causeth some sickishnesse in a woman and sore breasts which might be preuented with the childes sucking If the forenesse be only in the nipples a mother with enduring a little more paine may safely giue the childe sucke Many mothers haue giuen their children sucke when bloud hath runne by the mouth of the childe by reason of sore nipples and yet both mother and childe done very well 12. Obiect Diuers children being nursed by the mother haue died one after another Answ Due and thorow search must be made by those that are skilfull and if any cause be found in the mother then the rule holdeth Mercy and not sacrifice but if none can be found the issue must be referred to Gods prouidence and the vncertaine euen must not be an hinderance to a knowne dutie Thus the answering of the forenamed obiections maketh the point so much the more cleere §. 14. Of the fathers dutie in incouraging his wife to nurse her childe The dutie which on a fathers part in this respect is required is that he incourage his wife and helpe her with all needfull things for the performance of this dutie It is noted of Elkaâ—ah that he suffered his wife to tarry at home while she gaue sucke to her sonne and would not force her to goe vp to the tabernacle as his other wife did but gaue her all the ease and content he could saying to her Doe what seemeth thee good And of Abraham it is noted that after Sarah had done giuing the childe sucke he made a great feast euen the day that Isaak was weined one end whereof was to testifie his reioycing for Gods blessing on her motherly dutie so well performed §. 15. Of the faults contrarie to a mothers nursing her childe Contrary to this dutie doe all such mothers offend as for any by-respects when no necessity requireth put forth their children to be nursed by others 1. Some doe it for ease and quiet because they cannot endure to haue their sleepe broken or to heare their childe wrangle and crie 2. Others doe it for nicenesse because they are loth to open their breasts or to soile their cloathes 3. Others vpon pride conceiting that their beauty would be impaired and they looke old too soone 4. Others vpon gaine because they can haue a childe cheaper nursed abroad then at home where at least they must hire a maid the more 5. Others vpon pleasure that they might more freely ride abroad and meet their Gossips 6. Others vpon other by-respects all which doe argue much selfe-loue little loue to their childe and little respect to God They can be counted but halfe-mothers for nursing a childe is as much as bearing and bringing it forth §. 16. Of a fathers fault in hindring his wiues nursing of her child To the forenamed fault of mothers doe all such fathers make themselues accessary as forbid their wiues to nurse their children or are a griefe to them by their complaints of trouble disquiet and expence or afford not things needfull or doe not incourage them all they can to doe it The mothers both paine and paines is the greatest it is in comparison but a small thing
which of all other things will make the childe most obedient and gratefull to his parents for thus there is a double bond to binde him 1. his birth 2. his new birth especially when the cause of the one hath beene also the cause of the other 7. Nothing can more settle the heart of a wise parent on his death-bed concerning his children then assurance that pietie is planted in them for then may he with stronger confidence commend them to Gods prouidence and with greater assurance expect his blessing vpon them after he is dead 8. Parents by teaching their children pietie are an especiall meanes of propagating true religion from age to age and from generation to generation No better meanes can be thought of For if all parents were carefull of their dutie in this kinde as there is a succession of children and thereby a preseruation of mankinde so there would be a succession of those that feare God and thereby a preseruation of true religion My children that are taught by me may be fathers of children and so teach that to their children which they haue learned of me yea after them may grand-children proue fathers of other children and they teach their children the same and so from age to age others after them This is the meanes on our part and in our time we must doe our part and for those who come after vs leaue the issue to God Not only the great benefit of this point but also the too much neglect thereof in most families hath moued me the longer to insist on it and the more forcibly to presse it For the better performing thereof I will adde some directions §. 35. Of directing parents how to teach their children true pietie 1. Whatsoeuer principle of pietie parents doe teach their children they must be sure that it be grounded on Gods word thus much this phrase admonition of the Lord implieth Thus shall parents be sure to feed them with good wholesome spirituall food such as shall make to their spirituall nourishment and eternall life In this respect principles of religion grounded on Gods word are called sound or wholsome or healthfull words and that both in regard of their matter and substance and also in regard of their effect they cause and preserue good sound spirituall health We know that naturall men haue a care to giue their children such food as is wholsome for their bodie for will a father that is euill giue his childe a stone or a serpent and not that which is good Conscience must moue religious parents to haue the like care of the soules of their children as nature teacheth all parents to haue of their bodies If parents be carefull to draw those principles wherein they instruct their children out of Gods word they shall be sure not to poyson their soules with any error heresie superstition or idolatrie 2. When children begin to read let them read the holy Scripture so was Timothie trained vp from a childe 2 Tim. 3. 15. Thus will children sucke in religion with learning for there is a secret vertue lurking in the holy Scripture which is Gods owne word more then in any bookes of men so as through Gods blessing there may by this meanes be an inward worke of grace in children euen in their young yeeres Besides no bookes are more easie then many parts of Scripture and no histories more admirable and delightfull then the histories of the Scripture It is the aduice of an ancient Father that young children be made acquainted with the words and names of holy Scripture and that in stead of tales and fables choice histories of the Bible be made knowne to them and that they be instructed in the Prouerbs of Solomon 3. Let children be catechised constantly from day to day rehearse them continually vnto thy children saith the Law That which is daily done is in Scripture said to be done continually as the sacrifice which was daily offered was called a continuall offering Here let this caueat be noted that in giuing this spirituall food parents deale with their children as skilfull nurses and mothers doe in feeding infants they will not at once cram more into their mouthes then their stomach is able to digest but they will rather oft feed them with a little so it is not meet that parents be too tedious that will but dull a childs vnderstanding and breed wearisomnesse and make it loath to be againe instructed but precept vpon precept precept vpon precept line vpon line line vpon line here a little and there a little Thus shall they learne with case and delight and this being oft performed in time a great measure of knowledge will be gained thereby If a vessell haue a little mouth we vse not to fill it by powring whole paile-fuls vpon it for so all may be spilt and it receiue little or nothing but we let the liquor fall in by little and little according to the capacitie of the mouth so is nothing lost and the vessell filled the sooner Thus are children to be dealt withall 4. To the set times of catechizing children let other occasions of teaching them pietie be added as at table by resembling the spirituall food of their soules to that corporall food whereby their bodies are nourished when they are walking abroad by shewing them the starres how they remaine stedfast in their course the trees how they bring forth fruit in their season how all things are for the vse and benefit of man and thereupon make spirituall vses note the direction which for this purpose the Law giueth to parents Thou shall talke to thy children of my words when thou sittest in thine house and when thou walkest by the way and when thou liest downe and when thou risest vp 5. Let parents open to their children the mysteries of those outward rites which God hath ordained in his Church as of Preaching Baptising children administring the Lords Supper ceasing from worke on the Lords day with the like This was expresly commanded vnder the law Visible rites are great helpes to the weake vnderstanding of children when they are plainly opened and applied yea they are also especiall meanes of keeping in memory the mysteries contained vnder them as course threds or wiars are meanes to preserue pearles put vpon them So oft as they see the rites they will be put in minde of the mysteries implied vnder them 6. To this may be referred a declaration of such great and admirable workes as God in former times hath done for his Church especially such workes as haue beene done in their time and if any memorials be remaining of them make them knowne to children This direction was also giuen vnder the law concerning the monuments which were set vp of the great deliuerances that God gaue to his people In particular when the day of the gunpowder-treason is solemnized parents ought to teach their children the occasion
them to maintaine the children committed to them they are rather themselues by their paines that way maintained All the duties which were before comprised vnder nurture belong to Schoolemasters and Tutors More particularly they are to instruct children in three things 1. In learning 2. In ciuilitie and good manners 3. In true pietie and religion I shall not need to speake more of these points then hath before beene deliuered only to prouoke them to be diligent in well nurturing children in those three points let the benefit of good Schoolemasters and Tutors be well noted Schoolemasters commonly cast the first seed into the hearts of children they first season them as the seed is such will the crop be as the first seasoning is so will the sauour continue to be If they sowe no good seed at all what haruest can be looked for If they sowe a corrupt seed of rudenesse licentiousnesse profanenesse superstition and any wickednesse the crop must needs be answerable thereto But if they sowe the good seed of learning ciuilitie and pietie there is great hope of a good crop Hence it followeth that they are of great vse and may bring much good not only to the children themselues and their parents but also to the Church and Common-wealth Iulian the Apostat was not ignorant hereof and therefore endeuouring to root Christianitie out of the world he suffered no man that professed himselfe a Christian to teach a schoole but in stead of Christian Schoolemasters he set vp in euery part of his dominions heathenish Schoolemasters Tutors to whose gouernment young schollers that are sent to the Vniuersities are committed haue to deale with children in their riper yeeres euen when the time of setling them in a course is come the very time wherein much good may be done to children or else wherein they may be vtterly peruerted There will be little hope of bowing them and drawing them into another course after they be freed from the gouernment of a Tutor Tutors therefore as they haue need of great wisdome so of good conscience that they may haue the greater care of their Pupils and take the greater paines in teaching them the three forenamed points learning ciuilitie and pietie A good Tutor may doe much to repaire the negligence and amend the defects of a Schoolemaster but there remaine none to redresse the failings of a Tutor children for the most part are past redressing when they cease to haue a Tutor §. 79. Of the negligence of Schoolemasters and Tutors The vices contrary to the forenamed dutie of Schoolemasters are these 1. Unskilfulnesse Many that are more fit to be taught then to teach take vpon them this weightie calling Some haue not sufficient learning some againe are rude and know not themselues good manners and some know not the first principles of the oracles of God No good can be expected from these 2. Couetousnesse All that many seeke is to multiply the number of their schollers and to get as much as they can for boording and teaching they aime more at their owne gaine then at their schollers profit Children are not like to thriue well vnder them 3. Negligence Many are loth to take the paines of a Schoolemaster and thereupon come as little into the schoole as they can take euery small occasion to be gone againe care not how much their children play if they be able to hire a poore Vsher all the burden shall be cast vpon him Little is that fruit that can be looked for from them 4. Want of pietie Many skilfull and painfull Schoolemasters vnder whose teaching children come forward exceeding well in learning thinke it nothing appertaineth to them to teach the grounds of religion so as they altogether neglect pietie Assuredly they want it themselues for were their owne hearts seasoned with true pietie their consciences would moue them to teach it to their children The things of the kingdome of God are like vnto â—eauen which seasoneth the whole batch of dough with that season and sauour which it selfe hath When children spend almost all their time with their Schoolemasters of whom should they learne it if not of them What blessing can be hoped from the paines of such Schoolemasters I might to these adde the ouer-much remisnesse of some whereby children get too great an head and the too great seueritie of others either in frequencie of correcting as if they delighted therein or in the measure thereof as if they had to doe with beasts whereby they affright children make them dull yea and impudent also But these extremes were before handled The common fault of Tutors is altogether to neglect their Pupils Many thinke a Tutor to be a meeretitular matter no more to be required of them but to beare the very name and to vndertake that the Colledge be discharged for their Pupils diet This conceit and the practise answerable thereunto is the blemish and bane of the Vniuersities Many children well trained vp in schooles vtterly lose the benefit of all their former education when they are sent to the Vniuersitie because their Tutors altogether leaue them to themselues and so they are made a prey to idle and lewd companions By reason hereof many parents are vtterly discouraged to send their children to the Vniuersitie The seuenth Treatise Duties of Seruants §. 1. A Resolution of the Apostles direction to Seruants EPHES. 6. 5. Seruants be obedient to them that are your Masters according to the flesh with feare and trembling in singlenesse of your heart as vnto Christ 6. Not with eie-seruice as men-pleasers but as the seruants of Christ doing the will of God from the heart 7. With good will doing seruice as to the Lord and not to men 8. Knowing that whatsoeuer good thing any man doth the same shall he receiue of the Lord whether he be bond or free THe third and last couple of a family are Masters Seruants  The direction which the Apostle giueth to seruants is in this text set downe Therein he 1. Declareth their duties 2. Addeth motiues to performe them  I. In declaring seruants duties he noteth 1. The kindes of them 2. The manner   3. The extent   1. The kindes of seruants duties are noted in two words Obey vers 5. Serue vers 7.  2. The manner is set downe Affirmatiuely vers 5 7. Negatiuely vers 6 7.  1. Affirmatiuely by shewing what graces are requisite to which purpose he reckoneth vp foure particulars 1. Feare and trembling 2. Singlenesse of heart 3. Conscience to Christ 4. Good will Vnder which are comprised 1. Cheerfulnesse 2. Readinesse  3. Diligence  4. Faithfulnesse  2. Negatiuely by shewing what vices are to be auoided and these are two especially 1. Eie-seruice which is opposed to doing of things as Christs seruants from the heart  2. Men-pleasing which is opposed to doing the will of God 3. The extent of seruants duties is noted in these foure phrases 1.
Masters after the flesh vers 5. 2. As to Christ vers 5.  3. As seruants of Christ vers 6.  4. Doing Gods will vers 6.  II. The motiues which the Apostle vseth are partly Implied Expressed  They are implied three waies 1. By declaring the place of a Master as to Christ 2. By noting out the honour of their seruice as seruants of Christ 3. By shewing the ground of seruants subiection Gods will The motiue expressed is the Recompence which seruans shall haue for their paines largely laid forth vers 8. Therein these distinct points are noted in order 1. The assurance thereof knowing 2. The ground thereof taken from a generall rule whatsoeuer good thing any man doth 3. The particular application thereof whether bond or free 4. The kinde thereof the same shall he receiue 5. The author and giuer thereof of the Lord. §. 2. Of the lawfulnesse of a masters place and power In handling seruants duties I will proceed according to the order propounded In the first place therefore I will note out the kindes of seruants duties For finding out the kindes I will obserue the method followed in handling childrens duties Note then 1. The Fountaine of seruants duties 2. The Streames that issue from thence The Fountaine resteth partly in the opinion and partly in the affection of seruants In their Opinion they must be informed and resolued that the place of a master and a seruant is lawfull and warrantable that God ingenerall ordained degrees of superioritie and inferioritie of authority and subiection and in particular gaue to masters the authoritie which they haue and put seruants in that subiection wherein they are Till the iudgement be resolued hereof nor reuerence nor obedience will be yeelded as it ought For Reuerence hath reference to Eminencie and superioritie and Obedience to Authoritie and power Who will reuerence or obey him whom he taketh to be his equall This was the ground of the conspiracie of Corah Dathan and Abiram that they thought Moses and Aaron tooke too much vpon them and lift themselues vp aboue the congregation of the Lord. Wherefore I will here note the grounds of a masters authoritie and seruants subiection 1. God hath giuen expresse commandement vnto masters to gouerne their seruants and vnto seruants to be subiect to their masters In the fourth commandement God giueth a charge to masters ouer their seruants to see that they doe no manner of worke And the Angell biddeth Hagar humble her selfe vnder her mistresse hands And here seruants are commanded to obey their masters 2. Many directions are giuen both to masters and seruants in regard of their different places how to carry themselues one to another Read for this purpose the many lawes which Moses prescribed to both the many counsels which Solomon in his prouerbs especially giueth also to both and particularly the directions of this and other Apostles 3. Saints in all ages haue beene set in these places some in the places of masters and some in the places of seruants and according to the place wherein God hath set them they haue performed their dutie masters the duties of masters and seruants the duties of seruants 4. The many parables which Christ vseth taken from the power which masters haue and exercise ouer their seruants and the subiection which seruants yeeld to their masters shew that the authoritie of the one and subiection of the other are things without question granted and not denied 5. God hath made many promises of reward both to masters and seruants that conscionably performe the duties of their place and hath made many threatnings against the one and the other that are negligent therein All these grounds are so cleerely and plentifully noted in the Scripture that any one who is any whit acquainted therewith may know them to be so Were there no other arguments then this text which I haue in hand it were enough to confound all gainsaiers and to moue such as beleeue the rather for their faith and profession sake to serue their masters after the flesh §. 3 Of the Anabaptists arguments against the authoritie of masters and subiection of seruants Contrary to this first ground of seruants subiection is the opinion of Anabaptists who teach that all are alike and that there is no difference betwixt masters and seruants Their reasons whereby they would make shew to proue their vnreasonable opinion are these 1. Obiect Masters are either Infidels or Christians and so seruants either one or other If masters be Infidels and seruants Christians how vnmeet is it that Christians should be subiect to Infidels and if master and seruant be both Christians they are brothers but brothers are equalls and neither subiect to other Answ Rule and subiection are matters of outward policy they tend to the outward preseruation of Church Common-wealth and family in this world but faith piety and such graces are inward matters of the soule tending to a better life These being thus different one that is more excellent in the one may be inferiour in the other Yea though there be an equality in the one namely in spirituall things yet there may be a disparity in the other namely in ciuill and temporall matters And though Saints may be farre inferiour to infidels in outward estate yet they are not a whit the lesse glorious before God The honour proper and peculiar to Saints is inward not visible to the carnall eye of a naturall man 2. Obiect It is against nature for one to be seruant especially a bond-seruant to another Answ To grant that it is against that absolute and perfect nature wherein at first God created man and that it came in by sinne yet is it not against that order and course of nature wherein God hath now setled man God hath turned many punishments of sinne to be bounden duties as subiection of wife to husband and mans eating bread in the sweat of his brow 3. Obiect It is the prerogatiue of Christians to be all one but subiection of seruants to masters is against that prerogatiue Answ That prerogatiue is meerely spirituall for in Christ all are one as they are members of Christ which is a spirituall body not as they are members of a politique body A politipue inequality is not against a spirituall equality 4. Obiect This subiection is against the liberty that Christ hath purchased for vs and wherewith he hath made vs free Answ It is not For that liberty is from the curse and rigor of the morall law from the ceremoniall law and the rites thereof from Satan sinne death and damnation but not from those degrees which God hath established betwixt man and man for the good of mankinde 5. Obiect We are expresly forbidden to be seruants of men Answ To be a seruant in that place is not simply to be in subiection vnder another and to doe seruice vnto him but to be so obsequious to a
man so addicted to please him and so subiect to his will as to doe whatsoeuer he will haue done to regard nothing but his pleasure to prefer it before Gods word and will It is not therefore the thing it selfe but an excesse therein which is there forbidden §. 4. Of a seruants feare of his master The other part of that fountaine from whence the duties of seruants flow resteth in the affection and it is in one word Feare which is an awfull dread of a master An awe in regard of his masters place a dread in regard of his masters power An awe is such a reuerend esteeme of his master as maketh him account his master worthy of all honour which S. Paul expresly inioyneth seruants to doe A dread is such a feare of prouoking his masters wrath as maketh him thinke and cast euery way how to please him This is it which the Apostle here intimateth vnder these two words feare and trembling In both these respects S. Peter commandeth seruants to be subiect in al feare So proper is this feare to a seruant in relation to his master as where it is wanting there is a plaine deniall of his masters place and power which God intimateth vnder this expostulation If I be a master where is my feare that is you plainely shew that you account me not your master because in your heart there is no feare of me This feare will draw seruants on cheerefully to performe all duty the more it aboundeth the more desire and endeuour there will be to please and to giue good contentment and this is a point commanded to seruants to please well in all things yea it will glad the heart of a seruant to see his seruice prosper well hereof we haue a worthy patterne in Abrahams seruant whose care to doe his businesse as his master would haue it and prayer for Gods assistance therein and thanks for Gods blessing thereon sheweth an awefull respect which he bare to his master Againe on the other side this feare will keepe men from of fending their masters which was one reason that moued Ioseph not to yeeld to his mistresse and in this respect it may preuent many mischiefes which their masters offence and wrath might bring vpon them One especiall meanes to breed and preserue this feare in seruants is a due consideration of the ground of their masters place and power which is Gods appointment God hath placed them in his stead and in part giuen them his power they are the Deputies and Ministers of God and therefore in Scripture the title Lord is after a peculiar manner giuen to them What maketh subiects stand in awe of inferiour Magistrates Is it not because they beare the Kings person and haue authority and power giuen vnto them of the King §. 5. Of the extremes contrary to seruants feare of their masters Two extremes are contrary to this seruant-like feare 1. In the excesse a slauish feare when they feare nothing but the reuenging power of their master the staffe or the cudgell as we speake so they may auoid that they care not whither their master be pleased or no. This maketh them oft to wish that their masters had no power ouer them or that they were dead This was that feare which possessed the heart of that vnprofitable seruant who said to his master I knew thee that thou art an hard man and I was afraid Such seruile seruants will neuer be profitable 2. In the defect a light esteeme and plaine contempt of masters That this is contrary to feare is euident by that opposition which God maketh betwixt them in these words If I be a master where is my feare ô ye that despise my name As if he had said Hereby ye shew that ye feare me not as a master because ye despise me This sinne of despising masters is expresly forbidden and for it was Hagar dealt hardly withall When masters are poore meane weake aged or otherwise impotent then proud seruants are prone to despise them which argueth a base minde shewing that they respect their masters power more then his place the poorest and weakest haue the same place and authority ouer seruants that the richest and strongest haue all beare Gods image alike but disdainfull proud seruants shew that they regard not Gods image at all §. 6. Of seruants reuerence in speech The two maine streames which issue out of the forenamed fountaine are Reuerence Obedience  Reuerence is manifested in Speech Cariage  In Speech by Refraining Speech Well ordering   Seruants reuerence in refraining speech is manifested 3. waies 1. By sparing to speake without iust cause in their masters presence or audience This phrase they stand continually before thee and heare thy wisdome spoken of Salomons seruants sheweth that they were slow to speake and swift to heare in their masters presence 2. By forbearing to reply when they obserue their masters vnwilling that they should speake any more Thus did Peter forbeare when his master gaue him this short answer What is that to thee 3. By attending to that which their masters shall deliuer to them for seruants ought to shew such a respect to their masters speaking to them as Samuel did to God when he said Speake for thy seruant heareth The titles of Lord and Seruant doe shew that this speech is taken from the duty of seruants The notation of the Greeke word vsed by the Apostle translated Obey implieth as much This reuerence did Abrahams seruant shew to his master when he gaue him a charge about choosing a wife for his son Seruants for well ordering their speech vnto their masters must obserue fiue cautions 1. That they haue iust occasion to speake and that is either when their masters require them to speake as the disciples or when they see it behouefull for their masters that they should speake In such cases speech argueth reuerence as well as silence in other cases The generall points which were before deliuered of the reuerence of wiues to their husbands and of children to their parents may be applied to seruants and pressed vpon them as an argument from the lesse to the greater thus If wiues who in many things haue a ioynt authority with their husbands children who are not in so seruile a degree subiect to their parents as seruants to their masters must manifest their inward feare of their husbands and parents by outward reuerence much more must seruants to their masters To declare the force of this consequence so much the more let it be noted that the Apostle addeth another kind of word here then he did before either in wiues or childrens duties namely trembling Quest In what cases may it be behouefull for masters that their seruants speake to them Answ 1. When they know any thing that may be profitable for their masters they ought to
that he went to receiue gifts for himselfe Many such lewd seruants there be that knowing such and such friends of their master who will be ready to doe any kindnesse for them will vse their masters name to borow money or get some other fauour and neuer let their-masters know of it 3. When seruants will chuse their owne worke and doe that which liketh themselues best or else doe nothing at all Thus where many seruants be in one house together if they be not in such places as they like themselues they will mumble and grumble and doe nothing well 4. When seruants especially maid-seruants that are bound doe purposely mary to free themselues because our lawes doe free a maide that is maried from her seruice to master and mistresse 5. When they are liberall of their masters goods in giuing them away Some thinke that because they are of the house they may dispose the things of the house vpon charitable vses But pretence of charitie is no excuse for iniustice Seruants may giue notice to their masters or mistresses that there are in the house such and such things meet to be giuen away or that there are such and such poore folkes that stand in great need but priuily without any consent at all they may not giue away any thing of their masters 6. When vpon discontent they run away from their masters The two seruants of Shemei which run from their master are taxed for it by the holy Ghost One simus that run from his master is sent backe againe by S. Paul and Hagar is sent backe by an Angell Obiect What if master and mistresse be sharpe rigorous and cruell Answ An Angell from heauen giueth one answer Submit thy selfe vnder her hands And an Apostle giueth another Be subiect with all feare to the froward for conscience toward God endure griefe suffering wrongfully These faults are thus noted that seruants taking notice of them may the more carefully auoid them §. 13. Of seruants obedience to their masters commandements The affirmatiue and actiue part of seruants obedience consisting in a ready yeelding to that which their masters will haue done hath respect as the like kinde of childrens obedience to the Commandement Instruction Reproofe and Correction of their master I. A master hauing power to command his seruants it is a dutie of seruants to obey their master therein The particular worke which appertaineth to a seruant by vertue of his place is to haue an eie to his master to see what he requireth at his hands Dauid thus describes the property of good seruants Their eies looke to the hand of their master That looking as it implieth an expectation of releefe and succour so also a readinesse to receiue and execute any thing from them that they would haue done The Centurion commendeth this duty in the example of his seruants who euery one of them did what their master commanded them to doe It is further commended in the examples of Abrams seruant Eliahs seruant and many others Note how farre the Lord Christ exacteth this dutie of seruants Though a seruant hath beene all day plowing a laborious and wearisome worke yet when he commeth home his master commanding him to dresse his supper and wait he must doe it By all these proofes it appeareth that if a master bid his seruant come goe doe this or that he must obey The contrary hereunto is the highest degree of disobedience as when seruants refuse to be at their masters command and to doe what they charge them to doe as Ziba who being commanded to saddle his masters Asse went away and did it not and Iobs seruants who being called would not answer Of all other offences this doth most prouoke masters for it is a plaine contempt of their authoritie §. 14. Of seruants hearkning to their masters instructions in matters of their calling II. As a master hath power to command so his dutie it is to instruct his seruants in the way of righteousnesse and in that ciuill course of life wherein he is to walke The dutie then of seruants it is in both to hearken and be obedient vnto them 1. Such seruants as are vnder masters to learne their trade are bound many waies to hearken to them 1. That for the time they may doe the better seruice to their masters 2. That by learning a trade or skill in any good calling they may be the better able when the time of their seruice is out to maintaine themselues to teach other seruants which shall be vnder them and to doe the more good in the place where they shall liue 3. That thus they may the better discharge a good conscience in that particular place wherein God hath set them Contrary is the idle sluggish dull disposition of many seruants who by reason of their carelesnesse and vntowardnesse in doing that which they are taught vex and grieue their masters yea and make them weary of instructing them Many prentises spend all the time of their prentiship without reaping any good at all they neuer proue their crafts masters so many in the countrey liue vnder good husbands many Clearks vnder good Lawyers many maids vnder good houswiues and that many yeares together yet through their negligence get no good at all whereas if they would haue beene attentiue and carefull they might haue learned much Enemies these are to their masters to themselues to the city and country where they liue and to their friends and parents especially if they haue any aliue §. 15. Of seruants hearkning to their masters instructions in piety Such seruants as haue religious masters who are carefull to instruct their houshold in the way of righteousnesse ought to be obedient to their instructions so were Iosuahs seruants or else could not Iosuah haue vndertaken for them as he did and the seruants of that Ruler of whom it was said that himselfe beleeued and all his house and the seruants of Lidia and of the Iayâ—er concerning whom it is said She was baptised and her houshold he beleeued in God and all his house Vnder these words house and houshold none doubteth but that seruants are comprised Now then if the seruants of these had not hearkened and yeelded to the instructions of their master and mistresse would they haue beleeued in him in whom their masters beleeued or beene baptised when their mistresse was The like may be gathered out of this phrase The Church in their house for thereby is implied that all in the house were of the same faith that their master and mistresse were It is expresly noted of the Souldier that waited continually on Cornelius that he was a deuout man whereby it is presupposed that he hearkned to his masters instructions for it is noted of the master also that he was a deuout man and feared God The benefit which redoundeth to seruants by obeying such instructions is vnspeakable much
them namely when they haue them beyond sea to Turks and Infidels some to Papists and other Idolaters some to profane persons some to cruell inhumane beasts some to men of vnlawfull trades some to men of no trades Such masters as make their seruants ouer to such as these are or like to these shall answer for all the wrong is done to them §. 20. Of masters well managing their authoritie This Apostle in another place giueth this charge to masters Giue vnto your seruants that which is iust and equall By doing these two things masters shall well manage their authoritie Iustice respecteth the place and seruice of seruants Equitie respecteth their minde and manner of doing seruice All seruants in that they are seruants and doe their masters worke must haue that which of right belongeth to seruants This is Iustice Such seruants as beare an especiall loue and liking to their masters doing seruice not by constraint or with eye-seruice as men-pleasers but in singlenesse of heart with good will and all good faithfulnesse seeking to the vttermost of their power their masters good must be accordingly respected and dealt withall This is Equitie As the Apostle compriseth Iustice vnder this phrase doe the same things for seruice giue due recompence so more especially he compriseth Equitie vnder it for seruants good will and more then vsuall respect of their masters let masters returne good will and more then ordinarie respect to seruants S. Peter noteth these two vertues vnder two other words good gentle A masters goodnesse hath relation to Iustice his gentlenesse to Equitie §. 21. Of masters endeuouring the saluation of their seruants That Iustice which is required of masters respecteth the soule bodie and estate of their seruants In respect of their soules good masters must seeke the spirituall edification of their seruants When Zacheus first beleeued Christ said Saluation is come to this house Luk. 19. 9. why to this house rather then to this person but because he knew that Zacheus would doe the dutie of a good master and seeke the saluation of his houshold Herein must masters beare an impartiall respect to all in their house as the holy Fathers who though about temporall goods they put difference betwixt the place of children and condition of seruants yet in seruing God wherein eternall happinesse is looked for they did with an equall respect prouide for all the members of their house The proofes alleadged for seruants obedience to masters care in this point doe shew that this dutie appertaineth to masters See Treat 7. § 15. The respect which masters owe to God themselues their seruants the Church and Common-wealth where they liue requireth as much 1. God hath commanded as much Deut. 6. 7. as this charge implieth Thou shalt talke of my Lawes when thou sittest in thine house and God hath manifested his approbation thereof by commending Abraham for commanding his children and household to keepe the way of the Lord Gen. 18. 19. 2. Masters themselues reape great benefit by a faithfull discharge of this dutie and that both by discharging a good conscience to God who requireth this at their hands in that he hath made them prophets and priests in their house as well as kings and will require an account of them for all that are vnder their gouernment and also by bringing their seruants to doe more faithfull seruice to them For there is no such meanes to stirre vp seruants to doe all good dutie as the feare of God planted in their hearts That seruant that shall finde true grace either first wrought or further increased in him by his mastersmeanes will thinke him selfe so beholding to such a master as he shall neuer be able to make any sufficient recompence therefore will endeuour to do what good seruice he can in way of thankfulnes he will not only be faithfull diligent in his businesse but he will call vpon God to prosper his seruice for his masters good and to recompence that kindnesse which his master hath done to him 3. No earthly thing that a master can doe for his seruant be it portion of money preferment to any place of profit or credit or skill in a good trade and calling can be comparable to the edifying of a seruant in grace 4. Seruants well instructed in pietie are likeliest to proue most profitable not only to the familie but also to the Church and Common-wealth where they liue That masters may the better edifie their seruants 1. They must daily instruct them in the principles of religion and all duties of pietie admirable is the profit which will arise from a daily and constant vse of religious exercises though but a little time be spent at once yet will much knowledge be gained by a frequent vse of them This dutie is so much the more necessarie because publike Ministers cannot take such particular notice of euery seruant in their Parishes as masters may in their families 2. Masters must cause their seruants to goe to the publike ministerie of the word and worship of God to be further built vp thereby and confirmed in their faith Masters vnder the Law were commanded to let their seruants eat of the Passeouer which was a solemne sacrament The Law which enioyneth all males to appeare on the solemne feast dayes before the Lord implieth that seruants also should goe This dutie must especially be performed on the Lords day for the charge giuen to masters in the fourth commandement for sanctifying that day is extended to seruants in these words Thou nor thy man-seruant nor thy maid-seruant 3. Masters beside instructing seruants at home and causing them to goe to Church must take an account of their profiting both by the publike and also by the priuate meanes of edification Otherwise they shall not know how to order their manner of instructing them when to giue them milke when strong meat 4. To make the meanes more effectuall and profitable they must to instruction adde prayer Meanes without Gods blessing vpon the meanes are nothing As they obserue any grace wrought in their seruants they must be thankfull vnto God for the same and pray for the increase of it §. 22. Of masters neglecting to edifie their seruants Contrary is the minde and practise of most masters they thinke if they allow their seruants sufficient diet lodging and clothing or wages according to their couenant they haue done all that they need to doe and answerably they doe no more wherein they shew themselues no better then the heathen For doe not the heathen so Obiect At first taking of a seruant no more was couenanted Answ There are two couenants whereunto a master standeth bound one with God the other with his seruant Though his couenant with his seruant requireth no more then some temporall commodities yet Gods couenant requireth spirituall edification Many masters are so greedie of their seruants worke as they are loth to afford any time at
A Will to be made b 2 King 20. 1. Gal. 3. 15. Direction Inconuenience of dying without a Will * §. 56. The estate of parents to be left to their children Gen. 25. 5. Leu. 25. 23. 1 King 21. 3. Rom. 8. 17. Direction d Pro. 22. 7. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Eph. 5. 1. Gen. 22. 2. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Hesychius 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 exponit 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Plutarchus dicit 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 vocari 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Arist Rhet. 1. vocat vnicum oculum 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Reasons b Deut. 21. 17. c 1 Chr. 5. 2. d Gen. 49. 3. e Exod. 13. 2. f Leu. 25. 23. g Vers 25. h Vers 28. i Num. 36. 8. Iniquissima volucris aquila in educanda sua prole dicitur esse Pullorum enim alterum alis percussum abigit alterum solum vti suum educat Basil Hexaem hom 8. Gen. 37. 4. c Gen. 25. 28. d Heb. 12. 16. * §. 68. Consentaneum est rationi naturae vt aequè tribuere cuique vitam sic etiam viuendi facultates praestare Basil loc citat Deu. 21. 15. c. Gen. 21. 10. Iudg. 11. 2. Iudg. 9. 18. e Gen. 49. 4. 1 Chro. 5. 1. * Sum. Syluest part 1. Tract de haered Who are in place of parents b Luke 2. 48. c Gen. 25. 1. d Exod. 18. 1. e Ruth 3. 1. Parents in law to performe like duties as naturall parents f Luk. 2. 21 22. g Mat. 2. 14. h Luk. 2. 48. i Uers 51. k Ruth 1. 22. l 2. 22. m 3. 1. n 4. 16. Reasons o Eph. 5. 1. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 p 2 Cor. 11. 2. Senecae Hippolytus Ouid. Metamorph l. 15. sab 45. Lurida terribiles miscent aconita nouercae Ouid. Metam l. 1. fab 4. The next of kin to Orphants to be as naturall parents * §. 71. b Est 2. 7. c Vers 11. d Vers 20 22. Chap. 4. vers 13. f Psal 68. 5. Ruth 4. 6. 1 Tim. 5. 8. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Ioh. 19. 27. Tutela ad vtilitatem eorum qui commissi sunt non ad corum quibus commissa gerenda est Cic. Offic. l. 1. c Psal 10. 14. d Exo. 22. 22 c. * §. 28 34. The benefit of a good Schoolmaster Scholas phrontisteria virorum mulierum philosophiae ethnicae addictorum constru◠it Nicep eccl hist l. 10. c. 21. The benefit of a good Tutor * §. 48 49. Seruants must be informed of the lawfulnesse of a masters authoritie a Numb 16. 3. Grounds of masters and seruants places b Exo. 20. 10. c Gen. 16. 9. Serui cum crediderint plus dominis carnalibus seruire debent Cypr. Testim l. 3. c. 72 See Treat 1. §. 123. Prima seruitutis causa peccatum est c. Verum poenalis seruitus ea lege ordinatur qua naturalem ordinem conseruari iubet c. Aug. de Ciu. Dei l. 19. c. 15. b Gal. 3. 28. c Gal. 5. 1. d 1 Cor. 7. 23. See Treat 1. §. 124 125 126. Seruants ought to feare their masters b 1 Tim. 6. 1. 1 Pet. 2. 18. Mal. 1. 6. Tit. 2. 9. Gen. 24. Gen. 39. 8. Direction * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Gen. 24. 9. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Eph. 6. 5. Slauish feare in seruants Mat. 25. 24 25. Seruants despising their masters Mal. 1. 6. c 1 Tim. 6. 2. d Gen. 16. 6. a 1 King 10. 8. b Iohn 21. 22. c 1 Sam. 3. 10. d 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 See Treat 1. §. 96 124. e Gen. 24. 9. f Mat. 16. 14. * Treat 3. §. 13. * Treat 5. §. 4. 5. c. When behouefull for seruants to speake to masters * See Treat 1. §. 124. g 2 King 5. 3. 2 King 5. 13. Mat. 26. 17. Gen. 24. 5. 1 Sam. 24. 10. Directions for seruants well framing their speech to masters * §. 4. 2 King 5. 13. 2 King 6. 2. c. Mar. 4. 10. 1 Sam. 26. 17. Mat. 16. 16. Ioh. 6. 68. 1 Sam. 3. 18. 2 Sam. 14. 18 19. Gen. 24. 35 c. Tit. 2. 9. Pro. 29. 19. * See §. 5. Pro. 15. 1. Mar. 3. 32. Iob 19. 16. 2 King 5. 25. 2 Sam. 16. 3. 1. Seruants obeysance to their masters Gen. 27. 29. 2 King 2. 15. 2. Seruants dutifull behauiour before their masters d 1 King 10. 5 8. 3. Seruants seemly apparell 1. King 10. 5. 1. Rudenesse 2. Too much familiaritie 3. Pride Zeph. 1. 8. * Treat 3. §. 17. Treat 5. §. 11. Luke 19. 14. Exo. 21. 6. Psal 40. 6. Gen. 24. 5. Mat. 8. 9. Gen. 30. 35 36. 2 Sam. 18. 19 c. Pro. 31. 15. Mat. 8. 9. Mat. 25. 16 17. Exo. 21. 4. 1 Cor. 7. 2. * Sui iuris n 1 Cor. 7. 36 c. Luk. 16. 1 2. vers 8. o Gen. 30. 26. p 31. 20. 2 King 5. 20. 1 King 2. 39. Philem. ver 12. Gen. 16. 9. Gen. 16. 9. 1 Pet. 2. 18 19. What masters command seruants must doe Psal 123. 2. Mat. 8. 9. d Gen. 24. 9. e 1 King 18. 43. f Luk. 17. 7 8. Contrary Refusing to be at command 2 Sam. 19. 26. Iob 19. 16. See Treat 8. §. 21 38. Obedience of seruants to pious instructions b Ios 24. 15. c Iohn 4. 53. d Acts 16. 15 e 34. f Rom. 16. 5. Philem. v. 2. g Act. 10. 7. h Vers 2. Contrary 1. Loth to serue religious masters 2. Mutter against them being in seruice 3. Negligent because masters religious 1 Tim. 6. 2. 1 Pet. 2. 18. c. b Psal 105. 18. c Gen. 39. 20. * 1 Pet. 2. 21. d Rom. 12. 19. e Matt. 5. 39. f Rom. 12. 21. g 1 Pet. 2. 21. b Tit. 2. 9. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 * See §. 12. e 1 Pet. 2. 21. f Mat. 26. 53. * See more of this point Treat 5. §. 33. 34. b Philem. vers 11. c Pro. 13. 1. d Pro. 26. 3. e Pro. 17. 10. f Pro. 27. 22. I. Iam. 3. 12. * §. 4. * See Treat 1. §. 124. 2 Sam. 18. 12. 1 King 18. 9. c. Iudg. 9. 28. m Luk. 19. 14. n Psal 2. 3. 11. Col. 3. 23. Gen. 39. 11 12. Gen. 39. 6. Psal 12. 2. 2. King 5. 25. Iohn 13. 29. Eye seruice Matth. 24. 49. III. Sit seruus non vt seruus ad oculum sed vt domini studiosus Constit Apost l. 4. c. 12. Gen. 39. 9. Gen. 24. 12 27. Seruice on by-respects Matth. 6. 2. IIII. Seruice to be done cheerefully b Phil. 2. 7. c Psal 40. 8. d Joh. 4. 34. e Gen. 29. 20. * Apostolus seruos monet dominis suis ex animo cum bona voluntate seruire vt scilicet si non possunt à dominis liberi fieri suam seruitutem ipsi quodammedo liberam faciant Aug de Ciu. Dei l. 19. c. 15. Direction Heb. 11. 26. Contrary Discontentednesse Quicknesse b