Selected quad for the lemma: duty_n

Word A	Word B	Word C	Word D	Occurrence	Frequency Band	MI	MI Band	Prominent
duty_n	child_n	marriage_n	parent_n	2,707	5	9.3519	5	true

Text snippets containing the quad

ID	Title	Author	Corrected Date of Publication (TCP Date of Publication)	STC	Words	Pages
A13240	The araignment of leuud, idle, froward, and vnconstant women or the vanitie of them, choose you whether : with a commendation of wise, vertuous and honest women : pleasant for married men, profitable for young men, and hurtfull to none.; Arraignment of lewd, idle, froward, and unconstant women. 1615	Swetnam, Joseph, fl. 1617.	1615 (1615)	STC 23534; ESTC S529	43,338	78

vs many pretty toyes to moue vs to mirth and laughter and when they are bigger growne and that age or pouerty hath afflicted the Parents then they shew the duety of children in relieuing their old aged parents with what they can shift for and when their parents are dead they bring them to the earth from whence they came Yet now consider on the other side when a wrinckled and toothlesse woman shall take a beardlesse boy a short tale to make of it there can be no liking nor louing betweene such contraries but continuall strife and debate so likewise when matches are made by the Parents and the dowry tolde and paid before the young couple haue any knowledge of it so many times are forced against their minds fearing the rigour displeasure of their parents they often promise with their mouthes that which they refuse with their hearts Also if a man marry a wife for fayre looks without dowry then their loue will soone waxe cold insomuch that they vse them not like wiues but rather like kitchinstuffe whereas those which marry rich wiues they haue alwaies something to be in loue withall It is a common thing now a dayes that fayre women without riches find more louers then husbands Choose not a wife too faire nor too foule nor too rich for if she be faire euery one will be catching at her and if she be too foule a man will haue no mind to loue her which no body likes if too rich thou thinkest to marry with one which thou meanest to make thy companion thou shalt find her a commaunding Mistresse so that riches causeth a woman to be proud beauty makes her to be suspected hard fauoured maketh her to be hated Therefore choose a wife young well borne and well brought vp reasonable rich and indifferent beautifull and of a good wit and capacity also in choyse of a wife a man should note the honesty of the parents for it is a likelyhood that those children which are vertuously brought vp will follow the steps of their parents but yet many a tree is spoyled in the hewing there are some which haue but one onely daughter and they are so blinded with the extreame loue that they beare her that they will not haue her hindered of her will whatsoeuer she desireth so suffering her to liue in all wanton pleasure delicacy which afterwads turneth to be the cause of many inconueniences Now the Father before he marry his daughter is to sift throughly the qualities behauiour and life of his sonne in law for he which meeteth with a ciuill and an honest sonne in law getteth a good sonne and he which meereth with an ill one casteth away his daughter The husband must prouide to satisfie the honest desires of his wife so that neyther necessity nor superfluity be the occasion to worke her dishonour for both want and plenty both ease and disease makes some women oftentimes vnchaste and againe many times the wife seeing the husband take no care for her making belike this reckoning that no body else will care for her or desire her but to conclude this point shee onely is to be accounted honest who hauing liberty to doe amisse yet doth it not Again a man should thus account of his wife as the only treasure he enioyeth vpon earth hee must also account that there is nothing more due to the wife then the faithfull honest and louing company of the husband he ought also in signe of loue to impart his secrets and counsell vnto his wife for many haue found much comfort and profite by taking their wiues counsell and if thou impart any ill hap to thy wife shee lightneth thy griefe eyther by comforting thee louingly or else in bearing a part thereof patiently Also if thou espie a fault in thy wife thou must not rebuke her angerly or reprochfully but onely secretly betwixt you two alwayes remembring that thou must neyther chide nor play with thy wife before company those that play and dally with them before company they doe thereby set other mens teeth on edge and make their wiues the lesse shamefaste It behoueth the married man alwayes to shew himselfe in speech countenance both gentle and amiable for if a woman of modest behauiour seeth any grosse inciuility in her husband she doth not onely abhorre it but also thinketh with her selfe that other men are more discreet and better brought vp therefore it standeth him vpon to be ciuill and modest in his doings lest he offend the chaste thoughts of his wife to whose liking he ought to conforme himselfe in al honest and reasonable things and to take heed of euery thing which may mislike her Why some women loue their louers better then their husbands the reason is the louer in the presence of his Lady is very curious of his behauiour that he vseth no vnseemely gestures whereby there may no suspition of iealousie or any exception bee taken by any thing hee doth it behoueth euery woman to haue a great regard to her behauiour and to keepe her selfe out of the fire knowing that a woman of suspected chastity liueth but in a miserable case for there is but small difference by being naught and being thought naught and when she heareth other women ill spoken of let her thinke in her mind what may be spoken of her for when a woman hath gotten an ill name whether it bee deseruedly or without cause yet shee shall haue much adoe to recouer againe her honour and credite thereof let a woman auoyde so much as may bee the company of a woman which hath an ill name for many of them indeauour by their euill fashions and dishonest speech to bring others to doe as they do and many of them wish in their hearts that all women were like vnto themselues it may be sayd of many women that the feathers are more worth then the birds therefore it behooueth euery woman to behaue her selfe so sober and chaste in countenance and speech that no man may bee so bold as to assayle her for commonly Castles if they come once to parlie are at point to yeeld therefore if a woman by chance bee set vpon let her make this answere When I was a maid I was at the disposition of my parents but now I am married I am at the pleasure of my husband therefore you were best speake to him and to know his mind what I shall doe if her husband be out of the way let her alwayes behaue herselfe as if he were present Also a woman may consider if her husband be cholericke and hasty she must ouercome him with milde speech and if he chide she must hold her peace for the answere of a wise woman is silence and shee must stay to vtter her mind vntill hee be appeased of his fury and at quiet for if women many times would hold their tongues they might be at quiet There was a very angry couple married

yet I will not say but amongst dust there is Pearle found and in hard rockes Dyamonds of great value and so amongst many women there are some good as that gracious and glorious Queene of all womankinde the Virgin Mary the mother of al blisse what won her honour but an humble minde and her paines and loue vnto our Sauiour Christ. Sara is commended for the earnest loue that she bare to her husband not onely for calling him Lord but for many other quallities Also Susanna for her chastity and for creeping on her knees to please her husband but there are meaner histories which makes mention of many others as that of Demetryes how that shee was content to run Lackey by her husbands side Likewise Lucretia for the loue and loyalty that shee bare to her husband being vnkindly abused by an vnchast lecher against her will she presently flew her selfe in the presence of many rather then shee would offer her body againe to her husband being but one time defiled It is recorded of an Earle called Guncalles that vpon the Kings displeasure was committed to prison and his wife hauing liberty to visite him in prison on a time she caused him to put off his apparrell and to put on hers so by that meanes got out by the Porter and she remained in prison and so by this meanes he escaped the angry rage of his Prince and afterwards his wife was deliuered also Likewise it was no small loue that Artymenes bare to her husband for after his death shee built such a famous Sepulchre and bestowed the greatest part of her wealth thereon in so much as at this day it is called one of the seuen great wonders of the world Also Pliny makes mention of a Fisher-man which dwelt neere vnto the Sea side and hee fell sicke of an vncurable disease by which meanes hee endured such torment and paine that it would haue grieued any creature to behold him his carefull and louing wife laboured trauelled farre and neere to procure his health againe but at last seeing all meanes in vaine shee brake out with him in these words Death at one time or another will come and therefore rather then you should any longer indure this miserable life I am content that both of vs preuent death before hee come so this poore grieued mā did yeeld to her counsell and they went forth to the top of an exceeding high Rocke there this woman bound her selfe fast to her husband and from thence casting themselues downe ended their liues together Now I doe not commend this death to be godly although it shewed great loue in the woman no doubt but the King of Ayra had a very kind and louing wife as shall appeare for when Alexander the great had depriued him of the greatest part of his kingdome yet he bare it out very patiently with a valiant and manly courage and without any shew of outward griefe at all but when newes was brought him that his wife was dead he then most grieuously brake into teares and wept bitterly and withall hee said that the losse of his whole Kingdome should not haue grieued him so much as the death of his wife It is also recorded of Alexander that at the death of his wife he made such a sorrowfull kind of speech for her saying Death were kind if he tooke nothing but that which offendeth but he hath taken her away which neuer offended Oh death thou hast bereaued mee of the better part of my life It is also said of Valerius Maximus that he on a time finding two Serpents in his bed-chamber being strangely amazed thereat he demaunded of the South-sayers what it meaned and they answered him That of necessity he must kill one of them and if he killed the male then hee himselfe must first die and if the female then his wife should die before him because he loued his wife better then himselfe he most grieuously made choyce of the male and killed him first and shortly after he dyed leauing his wife a widdow Such a kind foole to his wife was Adam for hee was forbidden on paine of death not to eate of the tree of good and euill yet for all that Adam notwithstanding to gratifie his wiues kindnesse and for loue he bare her refused not to hazzard his life by breach of that commaundement But because in all things there is a contrary which sheweth the difference betwixt the good and the bad euen so both of men and women there are contrary sortes of behauiour if in thy choise thou happen on a good wife desire not to change for there is a Prouerbe faith Seldome commeth a better And there is none poorer then those that haue had many wiues Thou maist beare a good affection towards thy wife yet let her not know it thou maist loue her well and yet not carrie her on thy backe a man may loue his house well and yet not ride on the ridge loue thy wife and speake her faire although thou doe but flatter her for women loue to be accounted beautifull and to be mistresses of many maides to liue without controlement and kinde wordes as much please a woman as any other thing whatsoeuer and a mans chiefest desire should be first the grace of God a quiet life and an honest wife a good report and a friend in store and then what neede a man to aske any more Saint Paul saith those which marry doe well but he also saith those which marry not doe better but yet also he sayeth that it is better to marry then to burne in lust A merry companion being asked by his friend why hee did not marry he made this answere and said That hee had beene in Bedlam two or three times and yet hee was neuer so mad to marry and yet there is no ioy nor pleasure in the world which may bee compared to marriage so the parties are of neere equall yeeres and of good qualities then good fortune and bad is welcome to them both their cares are equall and their ioyes equall come what will all is welcome all is common betwixt them the husband doth honour and reuerence her and if he be rich he committeth all his goods to her keeping and if he be poore and in aduersity then he beareth but the one halfe of the griefe furthermore shee will comfort him with all the comfortable means she can deuise and if he will stay solitary in his house she wil keepe him company if he will walke into the fields why shee will goe with him and if he be absent from home shee sigheth often and wisheth his presence being come home he findeth content sitting smiling in euery corner of his house to giue him a kind and a hearty welcome home and she receiueth him with the best and greatest ioy that she can Many are the ioyes and sweet pleasures in marriage as in our children being young they play prattle laugh and shew