Selected quad for the lemma: duty_n

Word A	Word B	Word C	Word D	Occurrence	Frequency Band	MI	MI Band	Prominent
duty_n	care_n	child_n	parent_n	3,714	5	8.8140	4	true

Text snippets containing the quad

ID	Title	Author	Corrected Date of Publication (TCP Date of Publication)	STC	Words	Pages
A35407	Morall discourses and essayes, upon severall select subjects written by T.C., Esquire.	Culpeper, Thomas, Sir, 1626-1697.	1655 (1655)	Wing C7559; ESTC R13555	55,194	182

mistake this Argument for a kind of universal dispensation It is not easie ●n●eed yet possible It is not necessary yet very profitable It is but a help to devotion yet helps would not be sleighted where all is but too little and we can never be sure enough No man is excused without trial Neither can he answer it to Vertue or Conscience that might probably have obtained if he had not neglected it B●t what talk I of helps to Devotion or Perfection in Vertue A Mediocrity will serve turn A discreet Religion that can cut the thred and just turn the s●ales No plucking out of eyes I beseech you no cutting off of hands but a method of practical Divinity as short and easie as flesh and blood can contrive And good reason For then at least we are not in danger of will-worship the hideous bug-bear of so devou● and Orthodox an Age as our● XII Of Duties Matrimonial and Conjugall Love HAving briefly treated of single Life It remains now to take a survey of Conjugall The first concerns few and those esteemed but a kind of Anchorites and looked upon as the Schismaticks of humane Society The second is of a general extent And whatsoever is said upon that subject seems to touch Mankind Give me leave therefore to offer somewhat by way of Essay only without Argument or reproof in relation to Duties so vast and publick as those of Matrimony And let not any marvail That being neither in Act nor Contemplation as yet a Husband I am so busie to thrust my self into the Charge and instruct the maried For I conceive That as a third Party uninteressed I were the fitter if need required to interpose However since I undertake to state no Controversies but deliver Truths generally received and favourable alike to both sides My forwardnesse in this kind if it deserve no commendation can procure no just offence The Duties then betwixt man and wife are considered as common to both or peculiar and proper to either common to both And so they owe reciprocally each to the other 1 To make their Union an Act of prudent choice not of chance fondness or meer Avarice For it is no wonder that should miscarry which was misconceived Or that bitterness should be in the event where folly was in the Design 2 Communication of Vertuous knowledge and spiritual Commerce We cannot but desire to promote the happiness of those we love And that Passion should be so much the more fervent by how much its end is more excellent wherefore such as delight in each others well-fare here on earth cannot but far more earnestly covet to meet in Heaven 3 Mutual Fidelity For falshood of affection dissolves the Bond of Matrimony And those that transgress the limits of lawful love are already before God in a State of nullity We may say of them like St. Paul upon another account They have apostated from the faith and are worse then Infidels 4 Quiet Conversation and complianc● without publick jarrs or secret grudges If any discords happen yet they ought to be little short that by a sweet ingenuous return of friendship they may rather quicken then discompose the Harmony 5 Communion and Constancy in good and evil Fortunes To joy and sorrow thrive and wither live and die together since they are involved in each others sufferings and have espoused not persons only but Conditions even Afflictions and Infirmities 6 An intire affection to and care of their common issue whereby Conjugall love is increased and intended like reflected heat Indeed what greater re-enforcement of affectio● can there be since faithfull friends despair in any thing so lively to express or testifie their love and respect to deceased Parents as in the endearment of their surviving Children Peculiar Duties are either of the Man to his Wife or the Woman to her Hus●band The Husband owes his Wife 1 By his freedom and Complaisance in her society as much as in him lies to gratifie her just and kind expectations improve the comforts of her life and sweeten her solitudes lest she have cause to think her self in the condition of a Widow even whilst she is maried For since whilst she was free and might have refused her love to his Person bribed or swayed her to submit to his yoak He were very ungrateful to neglect her that chose him If elective Princes oppress they have no excuse since they violate not only the Rights but even the good will of their Electours 2 Tend●rness to her errours and a kind of equal jurisdiction not assuming the Authority of a censoriou● Paedagogue not p●tting her to the wrack of observancy not expecting so much regard as discreet VVives of their own accord allow 3 Confidence in her Vertue and honest freedom in her Actions and behaviour For jealousie is like a perpetuall alarm Herein most unjust That it bind● its Criminal to prove the Negative And arraigns her for a Crime whereof being once charged she can never purge her self 4 Communication of Counsels and secrets so far at least as will consist with Justice to others and by his own Prudence For he that locks up his bosom from his Wife especially in matters of Common Interest questions her fidelity or at best condemns her discretion 5 An Equal use of temporal Blessings Indeed a Wife is not like a Steward or Receiver Neither ought any Action of Accompt to lie against her who sharing with her Husband in Wealth and Poverty may not be presumed prodigal of her own Interest and improvident for her Children 6 A sober and careful Managery of his Estate without sinful imbezelling or sloathful impayring that Weal●h which is but half his own For what delight can there be in a declining fortune What feeming fondness can repair suc● a reall injury The VVife may well pitty or indulge but cannot truly affect a Husband from whose Luxury she apprehends or feels her own ruine let him pretend what love he will if she do no● distrust she hath too much cause to disdain it The VVife ows her Husband 1 Serenity of undoubted Vertue able of it self to prevent suspition or confute jealousie And this indeed is rather presumed then prescribed ●ince he that examines the Chastity of VVomen ●mpeaches it And hath already strangled their Innocency before he have proved their Guilt 2 Singular Modesty and simplicity of behaviour as the necessary Handmaid of honour For though unchastity be the fouler sin against God and her self Yet the scandall of Impudence i● far the greater wrong to her Husband 3 Sincere Love and endearement the perfection of Matrimonial union This would tame the roughest Satyre and molli●ie the fiercest Scythian This would reclaim the most dissolute and wean the most extravagant Where it prevails not it is a signe there remains no trace of Vertue or tincture of Ingenuity in that soul In all traverses of fortun● or distempers of mind this will teach her Husband to court his ease and

industry then the F●ench and other Tongues which commonly cost those that are least pregnant no more to gain even the perfect speech of them then the leasure or passe-time of two or three years Sixthly The learned and able Professors of Arts and Sciences should endevour to render them more clear and Mathematical by vindicating them from many of those uncertainties and intricacies wherewith they are now entangled that our knowledge be no longer buil● upon such Hypotheses as are more easily admitted then consented to or proved so that m●ny of our found●tions being blown away with one blast of denial we are as far to seek ●s if we had n●ver studi●d And being once beaten from Aristotle stand as mute as an ignorant Catholick would do if he could be driven from his impregnable Citadel the Church Why should Scholars in disputation give such false fire wrangle about meer notions and fight with their own shadows why should Sciences be encumbered with such a throng of distinctions wher●by Sophistry is maintained and truth concealed like a true Diamond in a heap of counterfeit Jewel● why should we acquiesce in Authori●y which though most necessary to Law and Gospel is the bane of Arts and a ne plus ultra to knowledge Some I confess have very auspiciously begun a Reformation in this behalf but it is in the embrio and will require a Colledge of the most learned to finish it indeed it is almost like the translation of the Bible work fitter for national Synods the private men S●venthly Those p●rsons to whose direction and conduct youth is committed should not be taken at random but with the same prudence and choice wherewith we elect our Magistrates or Delegates their profession should not be made the last refuge of such men as despair or are bafled in better preferments but should be accounted as indeed it is most honourable And the● should know how much both the pr●sent age expects from their Fidelity and future times from their Vertue as well by due regard to their persons as encouragement of their labours but alas our Age so abounds in loathsom pedantry that as the contempt of the Calling discourages many worthy men from professing it so the contemptibleness of the ●ersons yet brings the Calling into greater contempt Lastly There should not be wanting encouragements and rewards proportionable to the number and merits of ●arned and excellent men And wise Governours should study to distribute them not by chance but true desert The end of planting Nurseries is seasonably to convert them into Orchards otherwise the Planter is commonly a loser by them Where therefore there is no recompence expected men will rather content themselves with easie and thrifty ignorance And he will in time be a learned Priest that hath his breviary by heart Hence I fear it partly happens That such amongst us as have free fortunes and can live of their own account themselves ●s justly exempt from study and ingenious industry as in some Countries Gentlemen are from paying Taxes for all our Vertues are fostered by necessity or fed with expectation no knowledge or excellency is without its arrogancy and ambition which renders it impatient to be hearded with the vulgar being conscious of its own desert That wise Emperour Charls the fifth in his excellent Legacy of politick instructions to his Son Philip advising him to purchase the service of able men at any rates tells him he must by all means seek them out for as their Vertue teaches them Modesty so even that Modesty hath its Pride and looks that Preferment should court it Indeed the want of seasonable and convenient advancements for great wits and spirits drives them oft times to seek it by indirect means and possibly hath been the hidden spark that hath in all ages kindled notable flames in the world VIII Of Travelling and the qualifications unto it I Confess I am not of the humour of the age I live in which takes it for granted that such as travel not have scarce lib●●al education so that their lameness can be no way supplied or out grown I conceive Wisdom to be none of those Merchandises for which we trafick only in far Countries nor do I take good manners to be of so vast a b●lk that they require the fraught of a Ship or Bark If change of Climates and Meridians were sufficient alone to produce those excellencies we aime a● what abilities might we not exp●ct in our publick M●ssengers and weekly Posts certainly there are as wise men and every way as accompl●shed that never fo●sook their native Countries as those that have traversed the known world I rather incline to their Stoical opinion who believe that notwithstanding those goodly glosses and appearances which fond Custom hath put upon this method of breeding yet the goodness of the fruit scarce answers the fairness of its blossoms but that on the contrary it is the Sep-mother of Learning the Imposture of Vertue and a vast prodigality of Time for it is observable of many novices when they travel that at best they do but spend their curiosity in gazing upon sensible Objects Towns Palaces Bridges and the like as if they were only sent for silly spies to view the situation of the ●ountry B●t since the prejudice of times in this behalf is such that to disp●te against it is in danger to be accounted rather Heresie then good Philosophy I will endeavour to offer some preparatives by way of caution that Youth may travel with more benefit or lesse mischief Let then the grounds of true Religion be first imprinted in early Youth with such lively Characters as will not easily be defaced for Travellers seldom meet with those that catechise th●m many objects indeed they shall have to distract and alienate but few or none to perswade or encourage them in pious duties so that if they have not a stock to subsist in time of dear●h they may soon perish being so remote from the nurture of Parents and destitute of friendly admonitions in Countri●s● where a different worship being establshed they are constrained either to forsake their Religion or forget their piety Let them have civil and liberal Education to shame neither their friends nor themselves for else they will seem to travel like Barbarians into Greece not so much to learn the Arts and Ornaments of other Countries as to discover the Nakednesse of their own Let them be untainted with Vices which in travelling increase like snow-balls Above all let them be armed with Temperance and free from the habit of Wine-bibbing else the novelty of delicious fruits and pleasant Wines in Southern Climates will debauch them to the hazard of their health and wits and for reputation make them seem swine in the eyes of such civil and well-governed people as those amongst whom they shall live neither will any caution preserve them vertuous where Incontinency is boldly profest and Lust is become not a Custom only but a Diet. Let