I pray thee one of the yong men and one of the asses for I will haste to the man of God and come againe Againe that shee is to follow her husband when hee flitteth or departeth from place to place vnlesse hee forsake either her or Christ. To this purpose Paul saith hee had power to lead about a wife being a sister as well as the rest of the Apostles 1. Cor. 9. 5. Thus Sarah went with Abraham into Egypt Gen. 12. 11. and out of Egypt Gen. 13. 1. and to Gerar to soiourne there Gen. 20. 1. 2. 3. Thus the wiues of Iacob departed with him from their father Laban Gen. 31. 17. Contrary to these duties are the sins of wiues To be proud to be vnwilling to beare the authority of their husbāds to chide and braule with bitternes to forsake their houses c. Prou. 27. 15. A continuall dropping in the day of raine and a contentious woman are alike vers 16. He that hideth her hideth the winde she is as the oyle in his right hand that vttereth it selfe Exod. 4. 26. Then Zipporah said O bloodie husband because of the Circumcision It was the fault of the Leuites Concubine Iudg. 19. 2. Who played the whore and went away from him vnto her fathers house to Bethlem Iudah and there continued the space of foure moneths It was the sinne of Queene Vashi who refused to come at the Kings word which he had giuen in charge to the Eunuches therefore the King was verie angrie and his warth kindled in him Ester 1. 12. Lastly to be a cause of griefe to their kindred Thus the proud wiues of Esau the daughters of the Hittites were a griefe of mind to Isaak and Rebekah Gen. 26. 35. 27. 46. CHAP. 13. Of the Parent HItherto hath been treated of the first Couple whereof the family cōsisteth namely of married folkes Now follow the other and they are of two sorts either such as whereby the familie is increased and multiplied or such as are helpes thereunto Those whereby the familie is inlarged are also of two sorts Parents and Children Parents are they which haue power and authoritie ouer children The duties of parents are especially two One to bring vp their children The other to bestow them when they haue brought them vp Touching Education or bringing vp of children the parents care must bee both that they may liue and also that they may liue well Ephes. 6. 4. Touching the preseruation of the life of the child there are many duties required of the Parents specially foure First the mother is her selfe to giue the infant sucke and to wrap it vp in swadling clothes Paul cōmends it for a note of a good wife to nurse her owne children 1. Tim. 5. 10. Thus Sarah gaue sucke to Isaak Gen. 21. 7. Anna nursed Samuel 1. Sam. 1. 22. Dauid in likelihood was nursed by his mother Psal. 22. 9. Thou gauest me hope euen at my mothers breasts And our Sauiour Christ was also nursed by Marie his mother Luk. 11. 27. and swadled Luk. 2. 7. Now the reason hereof is plaine God hath giuen milke to women that beare children hath so appointed that no meat is more naturall to the child then the mothers milke And nature it selfe teacheth this in the course of other creatures The earth nourisheth that which it bringeth forth The fruit which the tree beareth is fed by the sap that comes from the root therof Yea amongst the bruit beasts euen those that be most sauage as the Tigres do giue sucke vnto the yong ones which they bring forth Yet in case of want of health or abilitie or any other iust impediment the mother may in equity beforborne and the child committed vnto a nurse And so we reade that Rebekah the daughter of Bethuel and afterward the wife of Isaak had a nurse Genes 24. 59. whose name was Deborah Gen. 35. 8. And Pharaohs daughter in a case of necessitie committed Moses to be nursed of an Hebrew woman whom she tooke not to be his mother but a stranger and her fact was allowed by God Exod. 2. 7. 9. The second dutie of the Parent is to prouide for his child meate drinke and clothing Our Sauiour Christ saith that Parents euen by the light of nature though they be euill will not denie or withhold necessarie food from their children Mat. 7. 9. 10. What man is there among you that if his son aske him bread will giue him a stone or if he aske a fish will giue him a scorpion And Paul saith If there be any that prouideth not for his owne and namely for them of his houshold hee denieth the faith and is worse then an Infidell 1. Tim. 5. 8. The third dutie is when God giueth abilitie meanes to lay vp some thing for the future maintenance of the child 2. Cor. 12. 14. for the children ought not to lay vp for the fathers but the fathers for the children Prou. 19. 14. House and riches are the inheritance of the fathers The fourth is to obserue both the inclination and the naturall gifts of bodie and mind that are in the child and accordingly to bestow it in some honest calling course of life Prou. 20. 11. A child is knowne by his actions whether his worke be pure and right In the Ecclesiasticall historie written by Ruffinus it is recorded that Alexander Bishop of Alexandria saw a far off in a place neare to the sea a companie of children playing together and in their play imitating himselfe in sundrie Ministeriall actions And whē he had a while viewed them he perceiued that they examined baptised one another according to the solemne order vsed in y ◠Cōgregation which thing whē he had made some of his Clergie acquainted withall and taken order that the children should be sent for and brought before him he demanded of them what sport they vsed and in what manner they played one with another The children at first for feare denied what they had done yet vpon further examination they confessed that they had made Athanasius who afterward became Bishop of the place their Bishop and that hee instructed and baptised sundrie of their companie He further asked both Athanasius himselfe and those which were said to haue been baptised what questions he asked them and what answeres they gaue and perceiuing by their speeches that they had framed themselues though in sporting maner to the Church-proceedings in those actions vpon conference had with his Clergie hee determined that those which had first been asked and had giuen answere fully according to the forme vsed in that Church and thereupon baptised should not be rebaptised And for Athanasius and the other children which had done the part of Ministers in their kind he sent for their parents and gaue them great charge that they should be brought vp in learning and religion that so they might in time be fit for the publike Ministerie The like course we reade to haue
the iust commendation of Rebekahs parents who though they were Idolaters yet had that regard of equity that they first called her and asked her consent before they sent her away with Abrahams seruant to be maried to Isaak Gen. 24. 58. Now in case the Parents faile in their dutie in this regard the son or daughter may lawfully declare the matter first to their kinsfolke and afterward if need be to the Minister or Magistrate and sue for redresse by their means and direction CHAP. 14. Of the Sonne THe sonne is he who is in subiection to his parents The duties of a son to bee performed to his parents are principally two First to yeeld them obedience whether they be his naturall parents or otherwise as his step-father step-mother and that while he liueth Eph. 6. 1. Children obey your parents in the Lord for this is right Luke 2. 51. Then hee went downe with them and came to Nazareth and was subiect to them Exod. 18. 19. Moses father in law said vnto him Heare now my voice I will giue thee counsell and God shall be with thee Ruth 3. 5. And Ruth said vnto Naomi her mother in law All that thou biddest me I wil do Iob 1. 5. And whē the daies of their bāquetting were gone about Iob sent and sanctified them This obedience must shew it selfe in two things First in the choyce of a lawfull calling wherein the child is to be ordered and appointed at the discretion of the parent Secondly in mariage For in that the parent is the principall agent and disposer of the child Now although his authoritie be not so great as that the child is to be forced and compelled by him yet the reuerent and dutifull respect which the child ought to beare towards him ought to be a strong inducement not to dissent or renounce his aduice without great and waightie cause Yea the child must endeuour by all manner of dutifull cariage to ouercome or at least to mitigate his parents seueritie in that behalfe Now for the daughters They must yeeld obedience to their parents in all Domesticall labours that they may be skilfull in houshold affaires Thus did the seuen daughters of the Priest of Midian accustome themselues to draw water and fill the troughes to water their fathers sheepe Exod. 2. 16. Thus Rebekah was seene to come out of her fathers house with her pitcher vpon her shoulder and to go downe with it to the well to fill it and giue drinke to her fathers Camels Gen. 24. 16. 17. The second dutie of the sonne is to recompence his fathers loue and care ouer him by relieuing him in case of want if God giue abilitie with food and rayment and other necessaries Herein children must deale with their parents as the brood of the Storke is reported to do with her by feeding her when she is old wherein they doe no more but what shee before hath done vnto them It is Pauls counsell that childred nephewes should recompence the kindnes of their kindred in the first place 1. Tim. 5. 4. and therefore to their parents the head foūdation of their kindred When Ioseph was in prosperitie and his father Iacob in want he first gaue him corne freely and afterwards sent for him to Egypt and there prouided for him in so much as the text saith of him that he nourished his father and his brethren and all his fathers house-hold with bread Euen as the mother puts meat into the childs mouth Gen. 47. 12. When Naomi the step-mother of Ruth was of great yeares and her strength spent Ruth gathered corne in the haruest for reliefe of them both Yea when Boaz gaue her to eate and to drinke she reserued part of her victuals brought it home with her gleanes to refresh her mother Ruth 2. 14. 18. The necessitie of the performance of these duties is so great that if the sonne neglecteth them and doth the contrarie by ill vsage of his parent either in word or deed he is worthie of death euen by Moses law Exod. 21. 15. He that smiteth his father or his mother shall die the death The law of the first borne of a mans children that he should haue a greater portion of his fathers goods then any of the rest of his brethren is perpetuall and admits no exception but only in the case of notorious wickednes Deut. 21. 17. He shall acknowledge the son of the hated for the first borne giue him a double portion of all that he hath for he is the first of his strength and to him belongeth the right of the first borne This was the law yet we reade that Ruben lost this prerogatiue by reason of his incest and Iudah the fourth sonne of Iacob had the dignitie of the first borne Gen. 49. 8. Thou Iudah thy brethren shall prayse thee thy fathers sonnes shall bow downe vnto thee In the Church of the old Testament the priuiledge of the first borne was three-fold the first of gouernment and royaltie the second of Priesthood the third of the double portion And it is probable that this was for the most part Ceremoniall and was accomplished and determined in Christ who was the Image of the inuisible God the first borne of euery creature Colos. 1. 15. Heere two questions are propounded Quest. I. Whether is it lawfull for the sonne to make a vow belonging either to religion or to ciuill conuersation without the consent of the parent Answ. A vow so made is not of force to bind the child but by the Law of nature common equitie is to be made void For it is a ruled case that he which is not his owne man that is to say at his owne libertie but vnder the power of another cannot bind himselfe Againe the authoritie of the parent by the law of God is great For it alloweth the father to make void the vow of the child pertaining to Gods worship Numb 30. 6. Quest. II. Whether is the consent of the parents to be required in the second mariages of their children Answ. 1. Of ancient times both by Ciuill lawes also by Imperial constitutions it was prouided that no widowes though made free by their former mariages should make any contract againe without the good will of their parents 2. Consent in this case though it be not absolutely necessarie yet it is to be thought fit and conuenient because children in some regards exempted from parents authoritie doe owe notwithstanding the dutie of honor vnto them by Gods expresse commandement Exod. 20. 12. and consequently ought to testifie the same by being ordered and aduised by them in some sort euen at the after-bestowing of themselues Hence it is that later Diuines haue holden vpon good ground That the espousals of widowes who haue some more libertie then the child first married being made without their parents knowledge cannot but incurre iust reprehension howsoeuer they may stand in force without it CHAP. 15.
â—hey keepe the way of the Lord to doe righâ—â—eousnesse and iudgement that the Lord may bring vpon Abraham that which he hath spoken to him â—en 18. 19. To the same purpose speaketh Ioshua If it seeme euill vnto you to serue the Lord chuse this day whom yee will serue whether the gods whom your Fathers serued that were beyond the floud or the gods of the Amorites in whose land ye dwell But I and my house will serue the Lord Iosh. 24. 15. And Cornelius is reported to haue been a deuout man and one that feared God with all his household Act. 10. 2. Thirdly common reason and equitie sheweth it to be a necessarie dutie for the happie and prosperous estate of the familie which consisteth in the mutuall loue and agreement of the Man and Wife in the dutifull obedience of children to their parents and in the faithfull seruice of seruants to their Masters wholly dependeth vpon the grace and blessing of God and this blessing is annexed to his worship for 1. Tim. 4. 8. Godlinesse hath the promises of this life and the life to come Psalm 127. 1. Except the Lord builde the house they labour in vaine that builde except the Lord keepe the Citie the keeper watcheth in vaine Vers. 2. It is in vaine for you to rise early and to lie downe late and eate the bread of sorrow but he will surely giue rest to his beloued Vers. 3. Beholde children are the inheritance of Iehouah and the fruite of the wombe his rewarde Psalm 128. 1. Blessed is euery one that feareth the Lord and walketh in his waies Vers. 2. When thou eatest the labours of thy hands thou shalt be blessed and it shall bee well with thee Vers. 3. Thy wife shall be as the fruitefull vine vpon the sides of thy house and thy children like Oliue plants round about thy table Vers. 6. Yea thou shalt see thy childrens children and peace vpon Israel 1. Sam. 1. 27. I prayed saith Hannah for this childe and the Lord hath giuen mee my desire which I asked of him The household seruice of God hath two parts the first is a conference vpon the word of God for the edification of all the members thereof to eternall life The second is Inuocation of the name of God with giuing of thankes for his benefits both these are commended in the Scriptures Deut. 6. 6. These words which I command thee this day shall be in thy heart Vers. 7. And thou shalt whet them vpon thy children talke of theÌ„ wheÌ„ thou tariest in thine house as thou walkest by the way and when thou liest downe and when thou risest vp Vers. 20. When thy sonne shall aske thee in time to come saying what meane these testimonies and ordinances and lawes which the Lord our God hath commanded you Vers. 21. Then thou shalt say vnto thy son we were Pharaohs bondmeÌ„ in Egypt but the Lord brought vs out of Egypt with a mightie hand Vers. 24. Therefore the Lord hath commanded vs to do all these ordinaÌ„ces to fear the Lord our God Psal. 14. 1. The foole hath said in his heart There is no God v. 4. They cal not vpoÌ„ God The times of this seruice are these The morning in which the familie comming together in one place is to call vpon the name of the Lord before they begin the workes of their callings The euening also is another time to be vsed in prayer because the familie hath seene the blessing of God vpon their labours the day before and now the time or rest draweth on in which euery one is to commend his body and soule into the protection of the Lord for no man knoweth what shall befall him before he rise again neither knoweth any whether euer he shal rise againe or not it is therefore a desperate boldnesse without praying to go to rest Besides this there be other times also wherein to performe this dutie as before and after meales For meats and drinkes are blessed to the receiuers by the word and prayer 1. Tim. 4. 4. Whatsoeuer God hath created is good neither is any thing to be refused if it be taken with thankesgiuing for it is sanctified by the word of God and prayer Now these times the word of God approueth Deut. 6. 6. Thou shalt talke of them when thou liest downe aud when thou risest vp Psalm 55. 18. Euening and morning and at noone I will pray and make a noise and he wil heare my voice Psa. 127. 1. It is in vaine to rise earely and to lie downe late and eate the bread of sorrow except the Lord vouchsafe a blessing who will surely giue rest to his beloued To these may sometimes be added the exercise of fasting which is as occasioÌ„ serueth to be vsed both publikely priuately especially when they of the familie be therunto called by some present or imminent calamitie Hest. 4. 16. Go and assemble all the Iewes that are found in Shusan and fast yee for mee and eate not nor drinke in three daies day nor night I also and my maids will fast likewise and so will I go in to the King which is not according to the law and if I perish I perish Zachar. 12. 11. And in that day shall there be a great mourning in Ierusalem and the land shall bewaile euery familie apart the family of the house of Dauid apart and their wiues apart the family of the house of Nathan apart and their wiues apart c. Wherefore those families wherein this seruice of God is performed are as it were little Churches yea euen a kind of paradise vpon earth And for this purpose S. Paul writing to Philemon greeteth the Church that is in his house Philem. 1. 2. And in like manner he sendeth salutations to the Church of Corinth from Aquila and Priscilla and the Church which was in their house 1. Cor. 16. 19. On the otherside where this dutie of Gods seruice is not vsed but either for the most part or altogether neglected a man may tearme those families no better then companies of prophane and gracelesse Atheists who as they deny God in their harts so they are knowne by this note that they doe not call vpon the name of the Lord Psalm 14. 4. Yea such families are fitly compared to an heard of swine which are alwaies feeding vpon the maste with greedinesse but neuer looke vp to the hand that beateth it downe nor to the tree from whence it falleth The other dutie concerning the house it selfe is That euery member in the familie according to their abilitie employ themselues in some honest and profitable businesse to maintaine the temporall estate and life of the whole Gen. 3. 19. In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread till thou returne to the earth for out of it wast thou taken for dust thou art and to dust shalt thou returne 1. Cor. 7. 20. Let euery man abide in the same vocation wherein he was called Now
been taken by the Heathen for iudgement of the inclination and towardnesse of their children The Athenians made a law that before children were bestowed in any calling they should bee first brought into a publike place where Instruments belonging to all sorts of trades were laid and look in what kind of Instrument any of them tooke most delight the child was thought to bee most fit for the trade whereunto that Instrument belonged and afterward applied to the same with good successe Now the Parents first and principall care must be for the Church that those of their children which haue the most pregnant wit and be indued with the best gifts be consecrated vnto God and brought vp in the studie of the Scriptures to serue afterward in the Ministerie of the Church Thus Anna dedicated Samuel her son vnto God by vow 1. Sam. 1. 11. And shee vowed a vow and said O Lord of Hostes if thou wilt giue vnto thine handmaid a man-child theÌ„ I wil giue him vnto the Lord all the daies of his life And she did according to her vow and the Lord blessed Samuel her sonne who in processe of time became a great Prophet The next point of Education of children is to prouide that they may liue well and lead a godly life To this purpose Parents must do three things First they are to be carefull that the child so soone as may bee after it is borne bee admitted into the true Church of God by Baptisme and haue a fit name giuen vnto it Secondly they are to endeuour to sow the seeds of godlinesse and religion in the heart of the child so soone as it comes to the vse of reason and vnderstanding and as it growes in yeares so care must be had that it grow in knowledge and grace To this purpose is the vow and promise made in Baptisme which parents are bound to call vpon the child to remember when it comes to yeares It was the godly care of Timothies parents 2. Tim. 3. 14. But continue thou in the things which thou hast learned knowing of whom thou hast learned them vers 15. And that thou hast knowne the holy Scriptures of a child which are able to make thee wise vnto saluation through the faith which is in Christ Iesus This was the commandement of God to the parents of his people Deut. 6. 7. Thou shalt rehearse these words which I command thee continually to thy children and shalt talke of them wheÌ„ thou tarriest in the house And vers 20. When thy sonne shall aske thee in time to come saying What meane these Testimonies and Ordinances and Lawes which the Lord our God hath commanded you Then thou shalt say vnto thy sonne We were Pharaohs bondmen in Egypt c. This was obserued by the Israelites in the ages â—cceeding Psal. 44. 1. We haue heard with our eares O God our fathers haue told vs the workes that thou hast done in their daies in old time Thirdly the first instruction of children in learning religion must be so ordered that they may take it with delight For which purpose they may be sometimes allowed in moderate maner to play and solace themselues in recreatioÌ„s fitting for their yeares And if they do amisse in either they are to bee restrained by the bridle of discipline First by reproofe in word and when that wil not helpe by the rodde of correction Zach. 8. 5. The streets of the citie shall bee full of boyes and girles playing in the streets thereof Prou. 29. 15. The rod and correction giue wisdome but a child set at libertie makes his mother ashamed vers 17. Correct thy son and he will giue thee rest and giue pleasures to thy soule Hebr. 12. 9. We haue had the fathers of our bodies which correct vs and we gaue them reuerence Yet in this point two extreames are carefully to be auoided That the Parent be not either too seuere or too indulgent to the child For seueâ—itie Paul giues his rule Ephes. 6. 3. Parents prouoke not your children to anger that is by too much austeritie in gouernmeÌ„t For lenitie we haue old Eli his example 1. Sam. 2. 23. And he said vnto them Why do yee such things for of all this people I heare euill reports of you Doe no more my sonnes c. So much for Education The second general dutie of parents is the bestowing of their children This bestowing is when they knowing their children fit for mariage not to haue the gift of continencie do vse their best indeuour to prouide matches for them in time or at least do aduise them therunto by themselues or by their friends 1. Cor. 7. 36. If any man thinke it vncomelie for his virgin to passe the flower of her age and need so require let them bee married vers 38. he that giueth her to mariage doth well Ierem. 26. 6. Take yee wiues and take wiues for your sonnes and giue your daughters to husbands c. Gen. 28. 1. Isaak called Iacob and blessed him and charged him and said vnto him Take not a wife of the daughters of Canaan Arise get thee to Padan Aram and thence take thee a wife of the daughters of Laban thy mothers brother Iudg. 14. 2. Sampson came and told his father and his mother and said I haue seene a woman in Timnah of the daughters of the Philistims now therefore giue me her to wife This dutie is now adaies carelessely neglected of Parents and the fruit therof is dangerous For hence it comes to passe that their children oftentimes do either commit whoredome or vndertake wicked and vngodly mariages In the choice of a husband or wife the Parents ought to haue a greater respect vnto pietie and wisedome then vnto beautie and riches or any other outward blessings Yet where they all concurre the partie so qualified is the more thankfully to be entertained Vpon these grounds the Priest of Prince of Midian gaue his daughter Zipporah to Moses and Moses agreed to take her Exod. 2. 19. A man of Egypt deliuered vs from the Philistims and also drew vs water enough watered the sheepe And Moses agreed to dwell with the man who gaue vnto Moses Zipporah his daughter Iosu. 15. 16. Then Caleb said He that smiteth Kiriath-sepher and taketh it euen to him will I giue Achsah my daughter to wife Yea it is a sinne to marrie only for beautie without consideration of the better things Thus the old world sinned wheÌ„ the sonnes of God saw the daughters of men that they were faire and tooke them wiues of all that they liked Gen. 6. 2. and Sampson who only vpon the sight of the woman in Timnah of the daughters of the Philistims without further inquirie desired that she might be giuen him for his wife Iudg. 14. 2. Againe it is meet that pareÌ„ts should deale moderately with their children in this case and not vndertake at any hand to force and compel them to marrie this or that partie This was
time proues incurablie contagious and so lothsome that the one may iustly feare to keepe and conuerse with the other as it falleth out when one is tainted with leprosie then the contract is vtterly to be dissolued as if God himself should haue commanded it though the promise was formerlie made the parties themselues should be vnwilling God hath ordained Matrimonie to helpe not to hurt either the persons themselues or others Where therefore these diseases be which may infect hurt or destroy others there God hath as it were testified from heauen that the act done is not pleasing vnto him and that presently it ought to be frustrate The contract being thus once dissolued the sounder partie shall be at his or her libertie to marrie againe But the diseased is by the Magistrates authoritie to be forbidden societie with any other in way of mariage and commanded to lead his life where he may conueniently from companie for feare of infection And withal he is for his owne part to sue vnto God by prayer in faith for the gift of continencie For certaine it is that he to whom God hath denied the power of vsing mariage with good conscience is thereby euen called to continencie and single life But if the disease be not contagious yet either incurable or so nastie that either of the espoused hath iust cause to be afraid of the others companie then both are to be aduised not to claime their right but willingly to surrender it each to other by mutuall consent that they may be free againe not bound by any former promise to liue together as man and wife Considering that they haue no hope mutually to conuerse together with comfort contentment while they so remaine Vpon this aduice giuen by their lawfull Pastor or some in his stead if they both yeeld or one of them at the least desires to be at his owne libertie the espousals are forthwith to be brokeÌ„ off But if neither will consent to a separation but rather proceed as they haue begun and in probability the one haue no iust cause to hold the other in suspition in respect of contagion they are not to be hindered from the consummation of their mariage Furthermore though one of them should haue a disease which is continuall without intermission yet curable or any other incoÌ„uenience should befall either of them after the sure-making wherby they become lame deafe or dumbe c. yet this is not a sufficient cause to moue them to renounce and dissolue the contract A second Case What if it falleth out that after the finishing of the contract one of the espoused persons bee long absent from the other so as the absence bee preiudiciall to the mariage that should ensue vpon the contract Answ. Inquirie must be made whether this absence be voluntarie or against the will of the partie If it be voluntarie For example if the man vpon an honest and iust cause the woman also being priuie thereunto shall go beyond seas and being admonished of his dutie before hand shal notwithstanding stay a whole yeare or more and will not returne but further wilfully absent himselfe then may it be lawfull to the woman to craue of the publike Magistrate a dissolution of the couenant made consequently marry another man vnlesse the former to whom she was contracted be heard of If he be then shall it be lawfull for him to pleade for himselfe and tendring no iust cause of his refusall he shall be forced by the Magistrates authoritie to stand to his promise and take the woman for his wife And the same order is to be taken in the wilfull absence of the woman after she is contracted If againe the man or woman shall vpon an euill mind and with purpose to deceiue each other absent theÌ„selues and depart meanes must be vsed that they may be admonished of their dutie That being done or at least vndertaken and yet the partie offending will not appeare if the other that is present vpon certaine knowledge of his or her want in respect of continencie shall sue to the Magistrate after publike and solemne notice giuen the contract may be broken But if on the other side either of them be absent against their wil and intendeth no fraud or deceit but is violently detained by captiuitie imprisonment sicknes force banishment transportation or such like then the partie present being desirous of the consummation of the mariage ought either to make meanes vnto him and expect his returne or haue certaine notice of his death before she promise or haue to do with any other in way of mariage A third Case What if after the contract one of the parties becomes furious or madde Answ. If the disease be continuall without intermission in all equitie and likelihood the espousals are to be dissolued vnlesse both parties after knowledge and experience of the disease haue knowne one another yet in this and all such like cases it is fit that all good meanes be tried and vsed and sufficient time be giuen for the restoring of the diseased to their former good estate and for the accomplishment of the mariage lawfully begun as before CHAP. 8. Of Mariage MAriage is that wherby the coniunction formerly begunne in the contract is solemnely manifested and brought to perfection Mariage is consummate by three sorts of actions one of the parents of the Bride and Bridegroome the other of the Minister in publike the third of the persons coupled together The action of the Parents is vpon the Mariage-day to bring the Bride and deliuer her to the Bride-groome that they two may become actually man and wife and performe each to other all matrimoniall duties And where the mariage is complete in any other manner so as the Parents vpon sound iudgement and deliberation shall deny their full and free consent either in expresse words or by coÌ„niuence and silence and that vpon iust and lawfull cause there though in the ciuill courts of men it may stand and the children borne therein bee legitimate before men yet the truth is before God it is of no force but a meere nullitie And because this doctrine touching consent of parents in these Cases is of great vse and auaileth much to the supporting and maiâ—â—â—ining of families I will first open the truth thereof and then proue it by reasons Vnder the name of parents are comprehended First the Father and Mother Secondly all Tutors and Guardians who haue the proper sole charge of wards or others vnder yeares of discretion Thirdly all such as are kindred of blood who are in stead of parents to childreÌ„ as the vncle by the fathers side the vncle by the mothers side and such like Now touching the consent of parents that is of father and mother I hold it requisite of necessitie to marriage For the authoritie of parents must not be resisted or violated As for Tutors and such as haue the place of parents their consent is not
only the vse but the bond and couenant of mariage Matth. 19. 9. I say therefore vnto you that whosoeuer shall put away his wife except it be for whoredome and marrie another committeth adulterie c. And yet the same bond may be continued and grow vp againe by the good will and consent of the partie innocent and consequently they may be reconciled and dwell together still 1. Sam. 25. 44. Now Saul had giuen Michal his daughter Dauids wife to Phalti the sonne of Laish which was of Gallim 2. Sam. 3. 14. Then Dauid sent messengers to Ishbosheth Sauls sonne saying Deliuer me my wife Michal which I married for an hundred foreskins of the Philistims The same course may be taken in like cases by the innocent specially vpon the repentance of the guiltie person But yet euery man must be left to his owne conscience and none is to bee compelled to take another from whom hee may iustly bee separated against his will Now in requiring of a diuorce there is an equall right and power in both parties so as the woman may require it as well as the man and he as wel as she The reason is because they are equally bound each to other and haue also the same interest in one anothers bodie prouided alwaies that the man is to maintaine his superioritie and the woman to obserue that modestie which beseemeth her towards the man After the diuorcement made it shal be lawful for the harmelesse partie not hauing the gift of continencie vpon leaue obtained of the Church and the Christian Magistrate to marrie againe But what then shall become of the partie offending Answ. If vpon the hazard of his Conscience in want of the remedie any libertie of second mariage bee to bee granted vnto him by the Church or Ciuill Magistrate as indeed here in England there is not diuers restraints in this Case must be obserued First no such libertie is to be granted so long as the matter remaines vncertaine whether they may be reconciled specially while the partie innocent liueth in single life Secondly it must euidently appeare that the said offending partie hath earnestly rpented him of his sin before he can either be receiued into the Church or admitted to a second mariage Thirdly this liberty is not to be granted him either presently or vnaduisedly but vpon frequent and serious admonition rather to giue himselfe to mourning and lamentation and still to remaine alone then to desire againe to enioy the benefit of that state which he hath alreadie so shamefully abused So much of the first way of performance of due beneuolence The second way is by cherishing one another Ephes. 5. 29. No man euer hated his owne flesh but nourisheth and cherisheth it as Christ also doth the Church This cherishing is the performing of any duties that tend to the preseruing of the liues one of another Wherefore they are freely to cōmunicate their goods their coūsel their labors each to other for the good of themselues and theirs The third way is by an holy kind of reioicing and solacing themselues each with other in a mutuall declaration of the signes and tokens of loue and kindnesse Prou. 5. 18. Reioyce with the wife of thy youth vers 19. Let her be as the louing Hind and pleasant wild goat let her breasts satisfie thee at all times and delight in her loue continually Cantic 1. 1. Let him kisse me with the kisses of his mouth for thy loue is better them wine Gen. 26. 8. So after he had bin there a long time Abimelek King of the Philistims looked out at a window and loe hee saw Isaak sporting with Rebekah his wife Then Abimelek called Isaak and said Loe shee is of a suretie thy wife Esay 62. 7. As a yong man marrieth a virgin so shall thy sonnes marrie thee and as a Bridegroome is glad of the Bride so shall thy God reioyce ouer thee This reioycing and delight is more permitted to the man then to the woman and to them both more in their yong yeares then in their old age CHAP. 11. Of the Husband MArried folkes are either husbād or wife The husband is he which hath authoritie ouer the wife hereupon in Scripture he is called the guide of her youth Prou. 2. 17. and they twaine being but one flesh he is also the head ouer his wife The duties of the husband towards the wife are these I. To loue her as himselfe Eph. 5. 33. Let euery one loue his wife euen as himselfe Gen. 24. 67. Afterward Isaak brought her vnto the tent of Sarah his mother and hee tooke Rebekah and she was his wife and he loued her so Isaak left mourning for his mother Note how the loue of the husband to the wife mitigates sorrow for the death of the mother He is to shew this loue in two things First in protecting her from danger Gen. 20. 16. And vnto Sarah he said behold I haue giuen 1000. shekels of siluer vnto thy brother behold he is the couering of thine eies amongst all that are with thee Let it be knowne amongst all be thou instructed 1. Sam. 30. 5. Dauids two wiues were taken prisoners also Ahinoam the Izreelite and Abigail the wife of Nabal the Carmelite v. 8. Then Dauid asked counsell of the Lord saying Shall I follow after this companie shall I ouertake them And hee answered him Follow for thou shalt surely ouertake them and recouer all Secondly in regarding her estate as his owne and prouiding maintenance for her both for his life time and as much as he may for time to come after his death Ephes. 5. 28. So ought men to loue their wiues as their owne bodies he that loueth his wife loueth himselfe vers 29. For no man yet hated his owne flesh but nourisheth it c. Exod. 21. 10. If he take him another wife he shall not diminish her food her rayment and recompence of her virginitie Ruth 3. 9. Vnto whom he said who art thou which said I am Ruth thine handmaid spread therefore the wing of thy garment ouer thine handmaid for thou art the kinsman II. To honor his wife 1. Pet. 3. 7. Giuing honor to the woman This honor stands in three things First in making account of her as his companion or yoke-fellow For this cause the woman when she was created was not takē out of the mans head because she was not made to rule ouer him nor out of his feet because God did not make her subiect to him as a seruant but out of his side to the end that man should take her as his mate Secōdly in a wise patiēt bearing or couering of her infirmities as anger waywardnes and such like in respect of the weaknes of her sexe 1. Pet. 3. 7. Giuing honor to the woman as vnto the weaker vessell seeing yee are heires together of the grace of life that your prayers bee not hindred Thirdly by suffering himselfe sometimes to be admonished or aduised by
Of the Master NExt vnto parents and children wherby the family is increased is a second sort of couples which are helpes therunto And they are Masters and seruants The Master is a member in the familie which hath power and beareth rule ouer the seruant And his dutie stands principally in three things First To make a good choice of his seruants which is then done when he inquireth first after such as feare God and be willing to serue him Paul makes the seruice and feare of God the maine ground of true obedience in seruants Ephes. 6. 5. 6. 7. Colos. 3. 22. It was the rule of Dauids choice Psal. 101. 6. Hee that walketh in the perfect way he shall serue me Abrahams chiefe seruāt of his house was a man that feared God as appeareth in that he made conscience of his oath Gen. 24. 2. 3. and prayed also for successe in the busines whereabout he was sent Gen. 24. 12. O Lord God of my Master Abraham I beseech thee send mee good speed this day and shew mercie to my Master Abraham Cornelius of Caesarea the Captaine of the Italian band had a souldier that daily attended on him who feared God and seruants also beside him to whom hee made knowne the heauenly vision which hee saw Act. 10. 7. Secondly To enioyne them labour and not to require more of them then their strength will beare The master is to rule ouer the seruant in iustice And then is his cōmandement vniust whē it will not stād with the course of nature with the abilitie of his seruant or with the word of God Therefore he is to require labour at their hāds proportionable to their strength yeeld thē sometimes intercession rest Leuit. 25. 46. Ouer your brethen the children of Israel ye shall not rule ouer one another with crueltie 1. Pet. 3. 8. Bee pitifull bee courteous one beare with another And for the furtherance of busines it is conuenient that the master be oftentimes present with the seruāts in their works Prou. 27. 23. Be diligent to know the state of thy flock and take heed to thy heards The good matron ouerseeth the waies of her houshold Prou. 31. 27. A man of Libya being asked what it was that might make a horse fat he answered The masters eye Thirdly To recompence the diligence and paines of his seruant and that three waies First by giuing him his due of meat and drinke for the present The good matron giueth the portion to her houshold and the ordinary to her maids Prou. 31. 15. Secondly by paying him his hire in the end of his seruice The labourer is worthie of his wages Luk. 10. 7. Well done good seruant and faithfull thou hast been faithfull in little I will make thee ruler ouer much enter into thy masters ioy Mat. 25. 21. Heere three caueats are to be obserued I. That the wages be proportionable to the work II. That it be paid in due time without deferring So the Master of the vine-yard when euen was come called his seruants together to giue thē their hire Mat. 20. 8. III. That the seruāt be not defrauded of any part of his due For this is a crying sin Deut. 24. 15. Thou shalt giue him his hire for his day neither shall the Sunne go downe vpon it lest hee crie against thee vnto the Lord and it bee sinne vnto thee Iam. 5. 4. Behold the hire of the labourers which haue reaped your fields which is kept backe by fraud crieth and the cries of them which haue reaped are entred into the eares of the Lord of hosts Thirdly if the seruant in time of his seruice be sicke the masters care must be by all means possible to procure his recouery Equitie must be the rule in these cases and masters are to do to their seruants that which is iust and equall Col. 4. 1. Now the seruant haplie falles sicke by and in his seruice and his health yeelds not only profit to his master but incouragement also to himselfe The good Centurion in case of his seruants sicknesse tooke the best course to haue him restored Matth. 8. 6. CHAP. 16. Of the Seruant THe Seruant is a person in the family subiect vnto his master The dutie of a seruāt is faithfully and diligētly to demeane himselfe in the affaires of his master and to doe seruice vnto him as vnto Christ though he be froward and hard-harted Titus 2. 9. Let seruants be subiect to their masters and please them in all things not answering againe Ephes. 6. 5. Seruants be obedient to them that are your masters according to the flesh with feare trembling in singlenes of your hearts as vnto Christ. Col. 3. 22. Thus Iacob serued Laban Gen. 31. 38. This twentie yeares haue I bin with thee thine ewes and thy goates haue not cast their yong and the rammes of the flocke haue I not eaten c. Contrariwise the seruant must take heed that he doe not his masters businesse negligently or for fashion sake or with eye-seruice as a man-pleaser that in case of rebuke or controlement he answere not againe lastly that hee be trustie withhold his hands from picking and his heart from deceiuing his master Seruants are of two sorts either free or bond-seruants A free-seruant is he whom his master hireth for wages to do him seruice To him belongs the iust paiment of his hire and in case of offence them master hath authoritie to censure and correct him prouided that in the execution thereof respect bee had vnto his age and the correction be vsed with moderation as if hee were his sonne A bond-seruant is a seruant bought for money and is commonly called a slaue Touching this sort a question is moued whether a Christian may with safe conscience haue and vse a man as his slaue Answ. The power right of hauing bond-men in those countries where it is established by positiue lawes may stand with good cōscience if it be vsed with moderation That authoritie in this behalfe is moderate wherein these seuen caueats be obserued I. That the master haue not ouer his seruant the power of life and death for this takes away the lawful power of the Magistrate to whom only the Lord hath committed the sword of iustice II. That there be not libertie granted him to vse his seruant at his owne will and pleasure in all things for this was not granted by the law of God to his owne people Exod. 21. 26. If a man smite his seruant or his maid in the eye and hath perished it he shall let him go free for his eye Also if he smite out his seruants or his maids tooth he shall let him go out free for his tooth III. That the power be not enlarged to the commanding of things against piety or iustice for in these cases a man must rather obey God then man Act. 4. 19. IV. That masters do not take libertie to make separation of those their seruants that be married
a table and a stoole and a candlesticke that he may turne in hither when he commeth to vs. These are the duties Heere if it be demanded whether the master of a familie is alway and necessarily bound in his owne person to doe all these things I answere that if there be iust and necessarie cause either in respect of his owne inabilitie or in regard of publike imployment vpon a lawfull calling whereby he is hindred so as he cannot do any of them himselfe at some times it is lawfull for him to haue and vse a deputie This our Sauiour Christ teacheth in effect when he saith Who then is a faithfull seruant and wise whom his master hath made ruler ouer his houshold to giue them meate in season Mat. 24. 25. Thus Abraham had a steward of his house Eliezer of Damascus Gen. 15. 2. and he performed the waightiest matters that concerned the establishment and continuance of Familie not by himselfe but by his Steward as namely the choice of a wife for his sonne Isaak Gen. 24. 2. Therefore Abraham said vnto his eldest seruant of his house which had the rule ouer all that hee had Put now thine hand vnder my thigh c. Thus Pharaoh King of Egypt had Ioseph Gen. 39. 4. So Ioseph found fauour in his sight and serued him and hee made him ruler of his house and put all that he had in his hands CHAP. 18. Of the Mistresse of the familie or Goodwife of the house THe Goodwife or Mistresse of the house is a person which yeeldeth helpe and assistance in gouernmeÌ„t to the Master of the familie For he is as it were the prince and chiece ruler she is the associate not only in office and authoritie but also in aduise and counsell vnto him 1. King 17. 17. And after these things the sonne of the woman which was wife or mistresse of the house was sicke Her dutie is two-fold First to gouerne the house as much as concerneth her in her place 1. Tim. 5. 14. I will therefore that the yonger women marrie and gouerne the house And that she doth three waies I. By exercising her selfe in some profitable employments for the good of her charge Prou. 31. 13. She seeketh wooll and flax and laboureth cheerefully with her hands II. By appointing her maids their worke and ouerseeing them therein Vers. 15. She riseth whiles it is yet night and giueth the portion to her houshold and the ordinary to her maids III. By ordering her children and seruants in wisdome partly by instruction partly by admonition wheÌ„ there is need Vers. 26. Shee openeth her mouth with wisdome and the law of grace is in her tongue vers 28. Her children rise vp and call her blessed c. Tit. 2. 5. That they be discreet chast keeping at home c. Act. 18. 26. Priscilla in her house with Aquila instructed Apollos in that wherin he was wanting expounding vnto him the way of God more perfectly Gregorie Nazianzen in an Oration made for his father saith That his mother was not only an helper but also a teacher or instructer and guide vnto his father in matters of religion godlines The second dutie is to giue the portion of food vnto her familie or cause it to be giuen in due season Prou. 31. 15. She riseth whiles it is yet night and giueth the portioÌ„ or meat to her houshold Thus did Rebekah in her house Gen. 27. 9. Get thee now to the flock bring me theÌ„ce two good kids of the goats that I may make pleasant meat of theÌ„ for thy father such as he loueth Quest. Whether may the goodwife without the consent of the goodman giue and bestow the goods belonging to the familie Ans. I. There are some things which are proper to her selfe and not part of her dowry which she brought vnto her husband And these she may claime as her owne because either they were reserued vpon the match made betweene them or else are peculiar vnto her by their mutuall consent and of them she may lawfully giue without her husbands knowledge II. The goods which are common to them both are of another nature and these shee may not bestow without his allowance either expresse or at least general and implicite specially when the giuing of them doth or may grow in likelihood to the hinderance and preiudice of the state of the familie FINIS * 〈…〉 〈…〉 Xenoph. ibid. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Cic. 3. de Nat. Deor. 1. Tim. 3. 5 Gen. 6. 12. 1. Sam. 2. 12. 23 24 25. 2. Sam. 14 33. 1. King 5. 6. 2. Sam. 15 1. King 1. Aristot. Politic. Xenoph. in Oecon. Psal. 128. 1 1. Tim. 4. 8 1. Cor. 7. 1. 2. 8. 9. Bellarm. de Matrim Sacram. libr. c. 19. Concil Trident. Sess. 24. Decreto de clandest Matrim Matth. 5. 32. Concil Trid. Sess. 24. Can. 7. a See the Code in sundrie places Lib. 5. tit 4 de Nuptijs tit 5. de incesto c. b Concil Trid. sess 24. can 12. Bellarm. de Matrim Sacram. cap. 32. Psal. 128. 3. Act. 20. 32 * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 * Diu deliberandum quod sâ—mel staâ—uendum * In verâ—is de 〈…〉 * In futurum * Non de facto de â—ure * De praesenti * Jn sauorem Matrimony Rom. 1. 26 * Species Leuit. 18 22. 23. * Ebr. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Sobriuo propior De ciuit Dei lib. 1â— ca. 16. Epistâ—l li. 〈◊〉 66. 1. Cor. 6. Beza de repudijs 82. * Cuius nuptias inâ—re non licet eius nec coniuâ—is licet Chap. 18. * Impuberes * Turpi Tertul. ad vxor li. 2. * Dilucida interualla Gal. 4. 1. Repudium * De honestate Sub Innocent 3. canon 51. Tertul. lib. ad vxorem 2. ad finem * Ritè Iure Basil. epist. 1. ad Amphiloch Canon 42. Lib. 2. ad vxorem * Oblationem sic exponit Beatus Rhenanus Niceph. lib. 14. cap. 55. Ambros. epistolar lib. 9. epist. 70. ad Vigilium Ambros. in 1. Cor. 7. 15. Libr. 4. dist 39. Lib. de Fide operib cap. 1â— Canon Proposuisti Distinct 82. Sozomen lib. 3. cap. 16. Sess. 8. Canon 9. 10. Ambros. lib. de Philosoph citat ab August contr Iulianum lib. 2. Arist. Ethic lib. 8. In 1. Cor. 11. Homil 26. 〈…〉 * In potestate patris Ruffin Eccles hist. lib. 1. c. 14. Nazianz. epist. ad Eudoxam * C. de Nuptijs L. vidua L. in coÌ„iunctione * Beza de repud diuort sect de spoÌ„salibus absque consensu parfactis Arist. Oeconom 7. Theodor Orat. 8. Aristot. polit lib. 1. * Ethchanicau suos initiatos * In Ioan. tract 51. in fine * Bagnalath babbaijth Domina domus