our selves as betrothed to him in righteousness and loving kindness mercy and faithfulness 2 2 To expect the love of a Husband from him To expect all that love kindness tenderness Comfort nourishings and cherishings from Christ spiritually Eph. 5.29 which the wife looks to receive from her Husband corporally As the spouse doth in the Canticles the kisses of his mouth Cant. 1.2 the Embraces of his arms cap. 2.6 the refreshments of his presence to sit under his shadow with great delights Cant. 2 3. Cordials and Refocillations to support and comfort the Soul in his absence this is to be staid with flagons and comforted with apples verse 5. Also the discovery of Christ to the soul for he hath promised I will manifest my self to you John 14.21 Will not the husband let his wife behold his face and the sence of his love shed abroad in the heart Rom. 5.5 Oh that is better then wine Cant. 1.2 The Communication of the seed of Grace this is the benevolence which Christ as a Husband renders to our souls 1 Cor. 7.3 to make them fruitful in good works We are maried unto Jesus Christ saith Paul that we should bring forth fruit unto God Hence the spouse saith Rom. 7.4 Cant. 1.16 Col. 1.10 Our bed is green This denotes the fruitfulness and flourishing of the soul in every good work by the spiritual Communion or heavenly Conjunction of Christ with the soul 3. 3. To perform our duty to him To express and perform all that duty spiritually to Christ which the wife doth corporally to her husband as subjection obedience love loyalty chastity serviceableness To reserve our hearts wholly solely intirely for him as his bed to lie in his Throne to rule in now the husbands bed and the Kings throne admit no Corrivals to be for him and not for another Hosea 3.3 to tarry many dayes for his gracious Return and manifestation of himself to our souls after his departures and Occultations of himself in our apprehensions from us to embrace and imbosom Christ and lay him between our breasts Micah 7 19 Cant. 1 13. as a bundle of mirrhe or perfumed bags To subject our desires to him and submit our wills to his that his will may be ours and there may be but one will between Christ and our soules to refer our selves wholly to be at his command and dispose To open our hearts unto him inviting and intreating him earnestly to come in and not onely to sup and lodge in them but to make his abode in and with our souls I opened to my beloved saith the spouse Cant. 5.5 To be sick of love for Christ as the spouse was Cant. 5.8 sick with grief for his absence and with desires of his presence and to seek him up and down as the spouse did Cant. 3.1 2 3. by night on our bed in private inquiries breathings and restless desires and pursuits after him and in the streetes and broad wayes of the ordinances and communion of saints and not to give over till we find him and having found him to hold him fast and not let him go to joyn ouâ—selves 1. Christ by faith and love to be one spirit with him he that is joyned to the Lord is one spirit saith Paul 1 Cor. 6 17 as Husband and wife are one flesh To leave father and mother yea wife and children house goods land all we have whatsoever is near or dear to us for Christs sake to follow Christ and to go to Christ which is best of all for us Phil. 1.23 This is the Law of the Churches mariage with Christ Psal 45.10 Hearken O daughter forget thine owne people and thy fathers house He that loveth father or mother son or daughter c. more then me saith Christ is not worthy of me Math 10.37 to have me to be the Husband of his soul Luk. 14.26 Christ requires we should leave all to cleave to him The Apâ—stle in Ephes 5. describes the Union and amity of Christ and the spouse by the sameness of flesh which Mariage causeth between Husband and wife and reacheth maried persons their duties by the communion of Christ and the Church and the souls duty to Christ by the wives duty to her Husband This is to spiritualize mariage and to improve it to a high holy and heavenly use the benefit whereof wâ—â—l extend to the days of Eternity What Expression of Conjugal love is there between man and wife which carieth not a resemblance of some spiritual intercourse between Christ and the soul 2. Benefit of mariage is Domestical the building of families and kindreds 2 Domestical Benefits of Mariage Ruth 4.11 and the multiplication of them Women are Builders hereof as well as men Rachel and Leah did build the house of Israel Indeed mariage is the fountain of all humane societies 3. Benefit is Political 3 Political Mariage laies the foundation of cities countreys nations of Lawes and civil goverment of Common-wealths and Kingdoms all these are superstructures upon Mariage also it furnisheth the same with useful and serviceable instruments That Mariage upholds the fabrick of the republick the continuation and succession thereof Hence it is cald the Seminary of the Common wealth 4. 4 Ecclesiastical Benefit of Mariage is Ecclesiastical the Propagation of the Church of God and of the trâ—e religion to replenish it with members as it furnished Christ the head of it and Saviour of the world with a body on earth for he was conceived and born of a woman that was begotten in wedlock Mariage afforded flesh unto the Messiah and provides materials for Gods Church both stones and pillars and helps to fill heaven with heirs therefore Mariage is called the Seed plot and Nursery of the church 5. Benefit of Mariage is universal 5 Universal the preservation and increase of mankind this was the end of Adam and â—ves creation and Mariage before the fall and this was Gods benediction upon them Be fruitful and multiply and replenish the earth Gen. 1.28 Were it not for mariage the world would come to an end Hence mariage is called the pillar of the world under God the right hand of providence Vse 1 Thankfulnes to God Vse 1. This should teach us thankfulness to God 1. For providing so comfortable useful and beneficial a Relation or condition for us as mariage is It is a great bundle of Benefits How many both private and publick are bound up together in it as in one volume 2. For all the benefit help and comfort God hath given us particularly in our Mariage in and by our yoake fellowes What shall I render to the Lord may the Husband say for giving me such a meet and sutable help as I think there is None such for me may the wife say for giving me so great a blessing in a wise loving tender Husband may both Husband and wife say for blessing us with the fruit of
Occasionatus a man occasionate a mans Occasion or the Occasion of a man to serve as an aid and as a Second to man 3. The woman was made after the man for Adam was first formed then Eve 1 Tim. 2.13 4. 1 Tim. 2.14 The woman was first in the Transgression She was first deceived by the Serpent then she drew her Husband into the same deception hereby she was the cause and beginning of sin and ruine to all mankinde and though she was given to be a help to man yet she proved at first to be a great hurt and hindrance to him From this priority and causality of the woman in sin the Apostle infers and presseth subjection and silence upon her to the man and not to usurp Authority over the man 1 Tim. 2.11 12 14. upon this account she was more straitly subjected to her Husband For this was inflicted as a chastisement for sin upon the woman Gen. 3.16 that her desire should be subject to her Husband he should ruleover her which implies as some observe a further Rule then man had over her by Creation and with more trouble and grief unto woman-kinde So that the yoke is now become to her more hard and heavy to be borne Women may Object Object That was Eves fault to be deceived by the Serpent and to be first in the Transgression not ours Answ Eves punishment is yours therefore her fault is yours Her peculiar sin is the fall distinct from Adams is justly imputed to you or else her particular punishment distinct from Adams is unjustly inflicted upon you Eves fault is as much yours as Adams sin is ours This subjection of the wife to the husband was the ground of the womans wearing a vail or covering as a sign she is under the power and Authority of her Husband 1 Cor. 11.9 10. and subject to him Rebekah took a vail and covered her self when she saw Isaac Gen. 24.65 Therefore she was made out of the side not of the head that she might be under him not above him in place and power Sarah obeyed Abraham whose daughters all obedient wives are 1 Pet. 3.6 And the holy women in old Time who trusted in God were in subjection to their own Husbands to v. 5. and those wives that are not obedient to their Husbands are not good Tit. 2.5 In this sence as some conceive the woman is said to be The Glory of the man 1 Cor. 11.7 scilâ—by her subjection when she obeyes her Husband as man is the glory of God when he obeyes God This is the first Duty of the wife Submission a Comely Lesson for her to learn Disobedience in a wife is a fault even in a Queen much greater in a meaner woman even among Heathens much more among Christians that are better taught as in Queen Vashti Esther 1.12.20 2. 2. Reverence Eph. 5.33 Duty of the wife is Reverence to her husbands person all due respect to him as her head in word and deed in gesture and deportment Even as Sarah obeyed Abraham and called him Lord. 1 Pet. 3.6 she is as one saith crowned and chronicl'd for it Michal mocked her Husband David 2 Sam. 6.21 23. and God smote her with barrenness for it she was childless to her death The wises reverential respect to her husband is an honour to him and an Ornament to her self 3. 3. Helpfulnes Duty is Helpfulness to her Husband in every thing in his body to cherish that in his soul to tender that in his family to order that in his Estate to get at least to save and to dispose that aright not to spend or waste the same in his calling and affairs to promote them in his Name and Credit to preserve that in his secrets to lock them up in her bosom She ought to be a Help to him in every thing a hinderance in nothing Else she is a woman but not a wife and he that findes her doth not find a good thing Prov. 18.22 The wife should cherish her husband as the better part of her self For this very end God made her for man and maried her to man to be a help meet for him Gen. 2.18 If she be not a meet help for the man shee will not please satisfie and give content A wife is like a garment though the cloath it s made of be very good yet if it do not fit us it will not please us it wil be uneasy or uncomely we take no delight to wear it Conveniency causeth contentation If the wife be no meet help shaped and cut out as it were of purpose for the man to fit and sute him every way in his disposition conversation and occasions she will not sit close to the man as a garment doth to the body that fits it but hang loose or be ready to fall off and rather hinder then further him and not be an Ornament to him I commend Prov. 31. from 10. to the end as a Glass for all that would be good wives to look and dress themselves in or as a pattern to imitate or Rule to walk by every day A vertuous woman will do her husband good and not evil all the days of her life c. approve her self faithful to him in every thing that his heart may trust safely in her Pro. 31.11 12. For Mariage is Conjugium the fellowship of a yoak wherein the wife must bear one end and draw equally with her husband 4. 4. Chastity Tit. 2.5 Duty is Chastity of Conversation which followes from chastity of affection and disposition in the heart wives must abstain not onely from all acts but from all Appearances of lightness wantonnesse dalliance or unfaithfulness that their husbands who cast off ordinances and holy duties may by the holy and chaste conversation of their wives be gained to the Lord to have a liking and good opinion of the Gospel and the wayes of Christ in which they walk 1 Pet. 3.1 2. This should be the wises design upon her husband 5. 5. Fear Duty is Conjugal feare of offending or displeasing her husband She that is maried Saith Paul careth for the things of the world how she may please her husband 1 Cor. 7.34 Wives should couple chastity with fear in their carriage to their husbands not to cross or vex or greive them 6. 6 Modesty Duty of a wife is modesty of Apparel and of behaviour 1 Of Apparel 1 of Apparel not to affect costly gaudy attire new fangled fashions or to go above her rank or to give way to pride vanity excess therein or to account outward adorning as plaiting of the haire or wearing of Gold c. or decking of the body her chiefe Ornament but 1. A meek and quiet spirit the frame of the hidden man of the heart which is incorruptible which is of great price in the sight of God 1. Pet. 3.3 4. and a great Ornament in the sight of men For after this manner in the
themselves thereunto to take off dulness and aversness the one from the other Yoke fellows should draw on one another to God and good and towards Heaven to publick ordinances and private exercises and to the Communion of Saints They should be goads and spurs each to other and worship God together as Companions in his service and fellow travellers walking hand in hand together to the kingdom of glory That they may be like Zacharias and Elizabeth both righteous walking in all the Commandments and ordinances of the Lord blameless Luc. 1.6 like Abraham and Sara both believers like Elkanah and Hannah 1 Sam. 1. both true worshipers of God like Aquila and Priscilla both helpers in the work of Christ Rom. 16.3 4. Now if either father or mother believe the children are holy federally 1 Cor. 7.14 and many promises are made to them especially if both the Parents be saints and believers God blesseth such with pious and prosperous children which are double blessings as he did Abraham and Sarah with an Isaac Elkanah and Hannah with a Samuel Zacharias and Elizabeth with a John Manoah and his wife with a Sampson Such Godly compeers make mariaâ—e it self honourable and they will live and die with Glory 5 Patience The fifth Common duty is Patience Husband and Wife should not onely labour to heal of which before but if they cannot yet to bear with infirmities one in another Remember this Rule never to be angry both at once but the one should bear with the others frowardness and Passion and for a time give way to it This is the way to overcome and quench passion in a yoke-fellow and to make them afterwards love one another better when the one by yeelding a little hath conquered the other whereas to be both angry at once is to add fewel to the fire and to make the slame of Contention between them very great this will dissolve the glue of affecton that made them cleave together and separate them and make of one two Patience is necessary to prevent breaches and preserve Conjugal Amity and familiarity between maried Couples and to possess themselves and one another It was the speech of a godly man I count it a necessary Qualification in one whom I may match my self unto to have no predominant humor in her which I cannot bear but to be able to bear any Infirmity of mine Another Reverend man as is reported seeing a very cholerick couple live very lovingly and quietly together as Husband and wife asked them how they could so sweetly agree and consort together to whom the man answered when my wifes fit is upon her I yeeld to her as Abraham did to Sarah and when my fit is upon me she yeelds to me and so we never strive together but assunder This mutual forbearance each of other will beget contention with their Coujugal Condition and further their endeavours to sute their minde to their Choice and to be well pleased one in another after Mariage Mal. 15. though before mariage they might have fitted their Choice to their minde That Mariage hath a great blessing in it wherein the greatest Contention between Man and Wife is who should love each other most and please one another best 6. ProcreatioÌ„ of Children 6. The sixth Common duty Procreation of children I will saith Paul that the younger women mary and bear children 1 Tim. 5.14 especially to seek a godly seed To this end Husband and wife should wrest by prayer with God not onely to bless them with the fruit of the womb but with such a seed as shall be blessed is not onely to give them children but children of promise as well as of providence such as he will make his children by grace as well as their children by nature heirs of God and coheirs with Christ God at the first made onely one woman for one man though he being the God of the spirit of all flesh had power to have made more but he did Conjoyn one woman onely to that one man and still continueth his ordinance of the same single Copulation that he might seek a seed of God that is a religious and holy posterity such as might worship him the onely true God and propagate his Church This is a proper and principal end of Mariage to wit the procreation of children â—or the propagation of Gods worship and of his Church of which I shall speak again afterwards yea this was the end of it Even in mans Innocency when he was without sin Hence amongst Gods people virginity was a grief as in the Case of Jephtahs daughter Judg 11.37 40. and barrenness was accounted a shame and reproach 1 Sam. 5.6 7. as Elizabeths speech implies Luc. 1.25 Hannah had experience hereof upon this Account because they could not increase the Church of God For which end Paul bids the younger women mary Tim. 2 14. Whereas an ungodly seed serves to increase the Synagogue of Satan Idolatry and profaneness and cause exceeding grief and troubles to their godly Parents And as it should be their earnest desire to bring forth a godly seed so should it be their care to bring thâ—m up for God in the Discipline and nurture of the Lord Ephes 6.7 in the fear and knowledge of God and in his worship loving their souls better then their bodies Augustin praised his mother that she travelled in greater pain for his Soul then she did in bringing forth his bodie Solomons Mother taught him a Prophesie that is lessons of chastity and temperance and the properties of a good wife Prov. 31. His father David composed a Psalm for his instruction Psal 72. Timotheus mother taught him the scriptures from his Infancy 2 Tim. 1.5 3.15 7 to build a godly family 7. Common dutie is to build a godly family not onely by the procreation and religious Education of children which is a pillar of the house but by a wise and godly Goverment and ordering of the house in which the wife ought to act her part I will saith Paul that the younger women mary and bear children and guide the house that is domestick affairs 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 1 Tim. 5.14 domi-portae To this end they ought to be discreet that is prudent and circumspect and keepers at home Titus 2.5 housewives to carry their houses as it were on their backs as snails do The Harlot doth not so Prov. 7.11.12 Her feet abide not in her house now she is without now in the street But Abraham when he was askt where is Sarah thy wife he said Gen. 18 9. behold she is in the Tent. To this end Husband and wife should put forth joynt endeavours in five particulars 1. 5 Things are requisite hereto 1 Family duties Jer. 10.25 To performe holy duties in their houses constantly of reading the Scriptures and of prayer Evening and Morning For without prayer they and their Familie lies open to Gods wrath and
judgments Let them pray with their family in the morning because some of them may fall sick and die before night and pray in the Evening also to commit themselves and their house to Gods safe keeping from all peril and danger for they know not what a Night may bring forth or day either and if evils befal them their hearts will smite them for neglect of this necessary duty of prayer in their families Also to Catechize repeat sermons and teach all in their house their duties and to seek the souls good of their servants as well as of their children and as well as to expect the service of their bodies and to charge them all to walk in Gods ways as Abraham did his children and househould after him Gen 18.19 Prov. 4.1 to 5. 1. Chron. 28.9 and as David charged his son Solomon in his life and at his death 1 Kin. 2.1.2 This is the mothers duty also to teach and command her children their duties My son saith Solomen Prov. 1.8 and 6.20 keep thy fathers Commandment and forsake not the Law of thy mother Josh 24.15 The master of the house should resolve with Joshua I and my house will serve the Lord every day together what ever other familes do we will pray and read Gods word that is perform holy duties together for the Glory of God and the good of all our souls as well as eat drink talk and sleep together and with David Ps 101.2 I will walk in the midest of my house with a perfect heart Esther 4.16 The wife also should be a help to her Husband in family duties and no hinderance therein Queen Esther and her Maides will fast and pray For if the wife should draw back from holy duties and be a discouragement to him therein the soul of her husband if he be godly can take no pleasure in her She is in a posture tending to perdition Hebr. 10.38.39 Mr. Abbot I have read a sad story reported by a Reverend Minister upon his own knewledge of an honest Christian that had a wife world ly and distrustful and he being much in Godly Excercise Morning and Evening in his family She would disturb him and goe about ratling her keyes or making some other noise to hinder him pretending that his Time spent that way might be imployed in getting of mony for his family This woman was given over by God to the Devils Temptations so far that she thrust a knife into the pit of her stomack and killed her self yet before she died she confessed thus much to that Minister and craved Gods pardon as well as she could Had it not been better that she had borne her husband company in holy duties and so gone hand in hand to heaven together Further set up Gods word to be the Law of your house to order your family and all the affaires of it according to the Rule of it For Gods word moulds and shapes every person in it for his Imployment and directs and keeps them in their several rankes Places and duties This is the way to have a Church in your house Rom. 16.5 as Aquila and Priscilla had 2. 2 Chuse good servants To chuse good servants such as know and fear God or as appear tractable and hopeful to be instructed and wrought upon Set David before you as a pattern herein Psal 101.6 7. Suffer no disordered swearing ranting persons to come into your house or to tarry in your sight such as will bring sin and a curse along with them Covet earnestly to have a choyce pickt family Acts 10.2 such as Cornelius had who feared God and all his house 3. 3 Exclude sin To shut sin out of doores as excessive drinking gaming swearing lying pride contentions Job 11.14 ch 22.23 vanities Follow the Councel which Jobs friends gave him as Zophar Let not wickednesse dwel in your Tabernacle and Eliphaz Put iniquity far from your Tabernacle then you shall know that your Tabernacle shall be in peace Chap. â— 24 God will keep house for you when you are from home as Bildad Job 8.6 If you be pure and upright God will make the Habitation of your righteousness prosperous Let it be your care to make it righteous and God will make it prosperous 4 Look well to the wayes of your houshold 4 Oversee the family to prevent or supress sin and to stop the beginnings thereof to cherish incourage good in all that live with you to reduce those that go astray in opinion or in conversation This is the duty of the wife as well as of the Husband Prov. 31.27 1 Sam. 3.13 14. The vertuous woman looketh well to the wayes of her houshold Because Elies sonnes made themselves vile and he restrained them not God judged his house for ever 5. 5. To Sanctify the sabbath To keep holy the Sabbath day not onely you but all within your house the charge whereof lyeth mainly on the master of the house and next upon the mistress Exod. 20.9 10. This Godly Covenant of your houshold will draw down Gods protection and blessing upon your habitation relations and upon all your affairs The use hereof is to exhort all Marying and married persons 1 To learn these mariage duties both special and Common Vse 1. Learn these mariage duties For any to mary before they know their dutie or how to carry therein is like setting up before one hath learnt the trade or like answering a Matter before one hears it which is folly and shame unto him Prov. 18.13 2 Vse 2. perform them To perform these duties of mariage carâ—full and constantly I commend unto you four Motives or inducements hereunto 4 Motives 1. 1 Duties of Mariage aâ—e matters of Religion Though Mariage in it self be but a civil matter yâ—t the duties of Mariage are Matters of Religion oâ— conscience and obedience to the gosâ—el â—â—ing fully prescribed and injoyned 〈…〉 And Christ will one day come in slaming â—ire to taâ—â—â—vengeance on them that obâ—â— not the Gospel in the precepts of it 2 Thes 1.8 2 2 To do the dutie This to get the Comfort thereof In the diligent and Conscionable performance of the dutie of mariage you may expect the comforts benefits and blessings of mariage A wife may draw forth the love and kindeness of a husband and a Husband may extract the helpfulness and comfort of a wife by the religious doing of their duties the one to the other For man or woman to expect the Comfort of a Relation and to neglect the duty thereof is to tempt God Math. 25.24 and to act the part of a hard man who looks to reap where he hath not sowen and to gather where he hath not strowed 3. 3 The mariage covenant Motive The solemn league and covenant you enter into mutually at Mariage whereof God himself is a witness Malac. 2.14 both of your making it
because the Author hath no copy of it There have been hitherto some expectations that this loss might have been recovered that this spiritual Tract might have been added unto the former but now through long disappointments our hopes grow more faint If hereafter Gods good hand of providence should bring this Manuscript either unto the Author at Lincoln or to my self at London the Restorer thereof should be well recompenced and it should be forthwith published for common profit Christian Reader as the Author deserveth so he beggeth thy Prayers who is Octo. 15. 1657. Thy Friend and Servant in Christ Simeon Ashe Let the Reader be desired to amend these faults with his pen before he peruse the Bâ—ok ERRATA PAge 2. Line 4. for efficiency read efficient p 2. l. 6. f justification r. institution p. 5 l. 13 f Love r. Lover p. 6. l. 9. r. to act in to his Church p. 6. l. 32. f. justification r. institution p. 8 l. 9 f. Lincy r Lâ—nâ—ey Margent r. 1 Kings 11 â— 3 â— p. 14 in marg Col. 18. 3. r Col. 3 18. p. 15. l. ult l is r. in the salâ— p 18. l. 17. f follows r. flons p. 23 l. 25 f Proprietors r. Proprietaries p. 25 l 3. f spiritual r special p. 25 l. 5 f. walking r. wel-being p. 26. l. 19 f. adâ—ance r. clean marg r. 1 Kings 11. 2. p. 26. l. 34. f. communion r communication p. 27. l. â—5 f. parties r. partie l. 26. f. it is r. and is aptest l 32. f heaven 1 healers p 30. l. â— f. allunder r asunder l. 2. f contention r. contentation l. 16. f. wrest r wresâ—le l. 19. put out is p 31. marg r 1 Tim. 5 14. f. Tim. 2. 14. p. 33. l. 26. f. covenant r. government l. 30 f. exercises r. exercise p. 44. l. 1. â—â— r. to thrist p. 53. l. 13 f. fore-arned r. fore-armed p. 59. l. 3. f. our r. or l. 28. f. ours r. our p. 60 l 3. f. learn r leave p. 64. l. 29. f. word r. world p. 70. l. 3. f. fitted r. filled THE HONOUR OF MARIAGE There be four things considerable in it The Honour Duties Benefits Troubles of it I. The Honour of Mariage Heb. 12.4 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 MAriage is honourable in all saith Paul of high esteem and great account among all sorts of Persons high and low rich and poor and the bed considered in it self is undefiled Adam and Eve might have used it in their Innocencie This is common to all mankind Reas 1. from the Author Reas 1. From the efficiency or Author of it that is God 5 wayes 1 By justification Mariage is Gods ordidinance he first invented it and appointed it What is of God is excellent and honourable 2 By administration he maried Adam and Eve When he had builded the rib he took out of the mans side into a woman Gen. 2.22 he brought her to the man that is joyned her in mariage with him and God is said now to joyn man and wife together Math. 19.6 that is by his ordinance and by his providence 3 By Qualification of the Persons for a Matrimonial Relation Gen. 2.18 making the woman to be a help meet for the man and the Man to be a fit head and guide for the woman This is Gods work A prudent wife is from the Lord. Prov. 19.14 So is a loving Husband God makes them so 4 By Benediction God blesseth them together to make them partakers of al the Ends and comforts of mariage As he did Adam and Eve when he had made them and maried them Gen. 1.28 Gen. 33 5. he pronounced a large blessing upon them saying Be fruitful and multiply and replenish the earth Children and famlies Psalm 107.41 are Gods gifts 5 By Mission of his Angels which God sends forth to be ministring spirits to his servants for assistance in this business as to Abrahams Servant when his Master sent him to Mesopotamia to take a wife unto his son Isaac and to Ioseph Mary's Espoused husband Gen. 24.7.21.40 Math. 1.20 Math. 1.20 and 2.13 The Ministry of Angels about mariage by Direction and protection implyes it to be weighty and worthy in it self though unto many it seemeth Worldly and base Reas 2. from the subject and circumstances Reas 2. From the Subject and Circumstances of mariage at the first Who were the first couple whom God maried Adam and Eve who were the common Parents of all Man-kind of all the Kings Queens Princes and Nobles in the world yea of Jesus Christ according to the flesh Even he was The Son of Adam Luke 3.38 Where was mariage first Celebrated In paradise where God manifested his presence to our first Parents which made the place a Heaven upon Earth When was mariage first instituted and ministred In the time of mans Innocency before his fall Before sin entred into the world Therefore there is no sin in Mariage but mariage is now a Remedy against sin The persons place and Time of the first mariage or of mariage at the first doe put Honour upon it Reas 3 From Jesus Christ Reas 3. From Jesus Christ who highly honoured mariage not onely by chusing to be conceived and born of a woman Espoused to a man and by his presence at that mariage in Cana of Galilee where he wrought his first miracle John 2.1 2 10.11 and manifested forth his Glory by turning water into wine and by comparing the kingdom of Heaven to a weddin Mat. 22. feast But especially by chusing a Conjugal Relation to stand in to his Church as husband to wife and therein 1. To manifest and Communicate himself to her 2. To solace and delight himself with her 3. To gloryfie himself in her and her with himself for ever in Heaven This mariage is begun between Christ and his Church and every true believer in Espousal upon Earth Hosea 2.19 2 Cor. 11.2 and it is consummated in Heaven Revel 19.7 8 9. Blessed are they which are called to the Mariage-supper of the Lamb that is as some expound it the Time of Celestial Joyes Hence the Civil mariage between man and wife is made by Paul a figure or representation of the Mystical Mariage between Christ and his Church and every childe of God in respect of the union or neer conjunction of them This is now bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh said Adam of his wife Gen. 2 23. we are members of his that is Christs body of his flesh and of his bones saith Paul of Saints and Beleivers Ephes 5.30 and of Conjugal Communion between them Therefore Paul concludes verse 32. This is a great Mystery but I speak concerning Christ and the Church as if he had said All I have written concerning husband and Wife sets forth the Matrimonial Relation and fellowship between Christ and his Church his expressions of love to her and interchangeably her duties
to him Let me adde Is it not an honour to Mariage that a most sweet choice Piece of Scripture was indited by the Holy Ghost as an Epithalamium or Mariage-song called The Song of Songs that is Cant. 1.1 of all songs the most excellent because it celebrateth the Mystical Mariage between Christ and the Church and poureth forth a Torrent of Spiritual love that is between them The forty and fiâ—th Psalm is of the same subject A Psalm of Love or Mariage-Hymn setting forth Christ the bridegroom in his Glory and the Church his spouse in her beauty Reas 4. 〈◊〉 General consent Reas 4. From General Consent and Opinion which as some observe hath setled mariage in Dignity and Honour Regers of Matrimonial Honour and graced it with Priviledges and granted Immunities to it far above single life both in war and peace Vse 1. Slight not Mariage Vse 1. Think not slightly of Mariage as a low contemptible thing but highly as a Solemn Ordinance of God of great consequence and Importance to you wherein the future Comfort of your Lives is bound up Therefore enter not rashly into it but advisedly with due consideration for the choise of a fiâ— yoke-fellow Prov. 20. â— Every purpose saith Solomon is established by Counsel and with good advice make war I may adde with good advice maâ—y because Mariage is not upon liking God hates putting away Mala. 2.16 but for life It is the tying of such a knot as nothing but death can loose it is a businesse of lasting importance An Errour therein may prove dangerous Shall we account that Relation or condition mean or inconsiderable whereof God himself was the Institutor and Minister Adam and Eve the first couple and Paradise the place where and Innocency the state or Time when Mariage was celebrated at first which Christ hath chosen to act into his Church unto Eternity Vse 2. Preserve the Honour of it Vse 2. Then Husbands and Wives should preserve the Honour of Mariage in their Carriage and not blemish or stain the Glory of it Either 1. By being light vain loose frolick in their spirits or demeanour for that is a dishonour to the Gravity of Mariage 2. Or by being froward peevish proud sullen discontented impatient disdainful in their spirits or carriage for that is a dishonour to the Amity Suavity and Society of Mariage 3. Or by unfaithfulnesse and bodily uncleannesse embracing the bosoms of strangers for that is a dishonour to the Unity Purity Chastity of Mariage Whoremongers and Adulterers God will judge Hebr. 13.4 if Magistrates do not 4 Or by loving any other man or woman in a conjugal way better then his own wife or her own Husband This is a dishonour to Gods Justification of mariage and to the mariage-bond and covenant which tieth Husband and wife to forsake all others in this way and to cleave in love one to another inseparably till death Vse 3. Honour God in mariage Vse 3 Then take Care and indeavour to honour God in your Mariage by marying in the Lord 1 Cor. 7.39 and 11.11 Qu. What is it to marry in the Lord Ans To make God the beginning and end of our Mariage 1 The beginning of it Make God the beginning of Mariage by seeking earnestly to God for councel direction therein for guidance of our Affection to a right object for the choice of a fit yoak-fellow for making the Woman a Comfortable help and the man a sutable Head expecting to receive one another as a special gist and token of favour from the hand of God For who findeth a wise findeth a good thing and obtaineth favour of the Lord saith Solomon Prov. 18.22 Prov. 19.14 And House and riches are the Inheritance of fathers a man may have a woman and a portion from her father but a prudent wife or the Qualifications of a woman to make her a wife is from the Lord the same may be said of the man Also by looking chiefly at or for the grace of God one in another as the load-stone of our love and the inkindler of our affections each to other Look more at inward goodness then at outward goods or beauty especially at sutableness in Religion Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers saith Paul 2 Cor. 6.14 Do not mary with Idolaters or Infidels this is 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 as when beasts of diverse kinds draw together an ox and an asse might not be coupled together in the law Deuâ— 22.10 We should be affraid to yoke our selves with any untamed heifers or bullocks that will not bear Christs yoke We should let Religion have a Negative voice in our choice that is not to mary any who are not really or hopefully religious When persons match themselves to those that are either profane and of no reglion or of false and contrary Religions then their wedding garment as one saith is made of Lincy wolsey Deut. 22.11 and the wedding Ground is plowed with an Ox and an Asse Such mongrel mariages brought destruction upon the old world Gen. 6.2 3. God forbids such ungodly matches Deut. Gen. 26.35 chap. 27.46 7.3 4. Esaus marying the daughter of the Canaanites was a great grief of minde to his father and mother and made Rebekah weary of her life If Moses mary an Ethiopian he cannot change her colour or her Qualities she will be a vexation to him Wo to Sampson if he mary a Philistine though he was the strongest man If Solomon mary Idolatrous wives they will turn away his heart after other Gods though he was the wisest man upon earth Kings 11.1.3 4 To marry unequally as a wise man to a foolish woman or a vertuous woman to a profane wicked man Charron is as one saith to binde the living to the dead which was the cruellest Death invented by Tyrants to make the living languish and die by the company of the dead 2 To make God the end of our Mariage Make God the end of mariage 1 by propounding Gods glory as the principal end of all our Mariage-comforts and enjoyments 2 By ordering our whole Carriage in that Matrimonial state according to the rule of Gods word 3 By depending on God for his presence therein and blessing thereon 4 By improving mariage to promote our serving of God and the saving of our own souls But more of these in the next thing to be confidered in Mariage II. The Duties of Mariage WHich are 1 Special of the one Party to the other 2 Or common to both and to be performed by both joyntly and mutually 1 1 Special duties of husband to wise 6.1 Love The special Duties of husband to wife are these 6. 1 A love to her which should be pure chaste sincere intire constant The Husband should love his wife 1 As Christ loved his Church Eph. 5.25 2 As the man loveth his own body ver 28. 3 As he loveth