marriages for hence ensue perpetuall discontentments to the parties so forcedly conjoyned an utter frustration of the end of mariage which should be mutuall comfort and not seldome dangerous machinations against the life of the disaffected consort as it were too easie to instance every where but especially if the affections of the yong couple have been before as it oft falls out placed elsewhere what secret heart burnings what loathing of conjugall society what adulterous plottings doe straight follow what unkind defiances passe between them how do they weare out their days in a melancholick pining wish each other themselves dead too soon Yea herin an imperious or covetous parent may be most injurious to him selfe in robbing himselfe of that comfort which he might receive from a dutifull child in her person in her posterity for the avoiding of which mischiefs it were meet happy that both parent and child could both know their limits which God and nature hath set and keep them Let the child then know that he is his parents that as he was once a part of them in respect of his natural being so he should be still in his affections and obsequiousness and therfore that hee ought to labour by all means to bring his heart unto a conformity to his parents will desire according to that universall rule of the Apostle Children obey your parents in all things for this is well pleasing unto the Lord Colos. 3. 20. The word is comprehensive In all things Things unlawfull passe for impossible we only can doe what we ought In all those things then which are honest lawfull just parents must be obeyed And the motions for marriage being such impose upon the child so far a duty of obedience as that he is bound to work his affections what he may to a compliance with his parents will the wilful neglect whereof is no better then a kind of domestique rebellion Let the parent again consider that the child however derived from his loins is now an entire person in him self that though the body came from him yet the soule was from above that the soul of his child is endowed with powers and faculties of its own that as he is not animated by his parents spirits so he is not in wardly swayed by his parents will or affections that when his reason coms to be improved there may bee differences of judgement betwixt his parent and him and from thence may arise a diversity or contrariety of affections and desires and these affections and passions may grow to such strength as that he himselfe shâ—ll not be able to maâ—ter them and if the parent feele himself subject to such infirmities well may he be induced to pity those whom a vigorous heat of youth hath rendred more head-strong and unruly withall let him consider that though the child shold be advised by the parent yet it is fit that he should like for himselfe that the will is to be led not driven that no marriage can be happy but that which is grounded in love that love is so altogether voluntary that it can not consist with constraint Lastly let him know that the power of the father though great yet is not unlimited It is the charge which the father of mercies hath laid upon all earthly fathers in their carriage towards their children Fathers provoke not your children to wrath or as the Vulgar reads it to indignation lest they be discouraged and surely if there be any thing wherein the passion of the child may be like to be inordinately stirred it is in the crossing of an once-well-setled-affection and diverting the streame of love into another channell For the avoiding whereof the imperiall lawes have been so indulgent to the child as that according to their best glosses they permit not the father to disinherit the daughter for chosing an husband not unworthy of her self though against her fathersâ— mind yea some of them have gone a step further but I forbeare How far it may be lawfull and fit for the parent to puniâ—h the disrespect of a child in so important a case is not for me to determine doubtlesse where the provision is arbitrary the parent will be apt so to manage it as to make the child sensible of a disobedience so as both parts herein suffer and are put into a way of late repentance Briefly therefore on the one side the Son or Daughter doe justly offend if without cause or wilfully they refuse the parents choyce and are in duty bound to worke their hearts to an obedient subjection to those unto whom they owe themselves and for this cause must bee wary in suffering their affections to over-runne their owne reason and their parents guidance eyther suppressing the first motions of unruly passions or if they grow impetuous venting them betimes into the tender eares of their indulgent Parents or discreet and faithful friends that so they may seasonably prevent their own misery and their parents grief On the other side the parent shal offend if holding too hard an hand over the fruit of his own body he shall resolve violently to force the childs affections to his own bent where he finds them setled wil rather break then bow them not caring so much to perswade as to compell love These harshnesses have too much of Tyranny in them to be incident to a Christ an parent who must transact all these matrimonial affaires in a smooth plausible way of consent indulgence A noble and ancient pattern whereof we find in the contract betwixt Isaac his Rebecca Gen. 24. 49 50 51 52 c. the match was treated on betwixt Abrahams proxie and the maids father Bethuel and her brother Laban The circumstances drew their full consent all is agreed upon betwixt parents but when all this is don nothing is don till Rebecca have given her assent they said Wee will call the damsell and enquire at her mouth ver 57. And they called Rebecca and said unto her Wilt thou goe with this man And she said I will goe ver 58. Now the contract is made up till then all the engagements of Bethuel and Laban were but complements Till then all the rich Jewels of Gold and Silver given to the intended Bride and all the precious things given to her mother brother were but at the mercy of the receivers Neither ought it to be other in all Christian espousals the free and cheerfull consent of parents and parties makes the match both full and happy Let not the Childe dare to crosse his parents let not the Parent think to force the child and when an undue bargain is through the heat of passion made up past reclamation let love and pity so far intercede for the offenders that they may smart for their rashness neglect without their utter undoing CASE V. Whether the marriage of Cousens Germans that is of Brothers or Sisters Children be lawfull THe displeasure of the Canon
partner in the injury if for want of his seasonable interposition a good cause is lost and a false plea prevailes That therefore which in the second place he alledgeth that the Subject can have no reason to complaine of the Judge for as much as it is out of his power to remedy the case and to passe other sentence than is chalked forth by the rule of Law might as well be alledged against him in the plea of life and death wherein he will by no meanes allow the Judge this liberty of an undue commendation neither is there any just pretence why an honest and well-minded Judge should be so sparing in a case of life and so too prodigall in matter of livelyhood As for this third reason that the mis-judgement in case of a pecuniary damage or banishment may be afterwards capable of being reversed and upon a new Traverse the cause may be fercht about at further leisure whereas death once inflicted is past all power of revocation It may well inferre that therefore there should bee so much more deliberation and care had in passing sentence upon capitall matters than civill by how much life is more prcious and irrevocable than our worldly substance but it can never inferre that injustice should bee tolerable in the one not in the other Justice had wont to be painted blind-fold with a paire of scales in her hand wherefore else but to imply that he who would judge aright must not look upon the issue or event but must weigh impartially the true state of the cause in all the grounds and circumstances thereof and sentence accordingly To say then that a Judge may passe a doome formally legall but materially unjust because the case upon a new suit may be righted were no other than to say I may lawfully wound a man because I know how to heale him againe Shortly therefore whether it be in causes criminall or civill whether concerning life or estate let those who sit in the seat of Judicature as they will answer it before the great Judge of the World resolve what event soever follow to judge righteous judgement not justifying the wicked not condemning the innocent both which are equally abominable in the sight of the Almighty CASE VII Whether and in what cases am I bound to be an accuser of another TO be an accuser of others is a matter of much envy and detestation insomuch as it is the style of the Devill himselfe to be accusator fratrum an accuser of the brethren Yet not of his owne brethren in evill It was never heard that one evill spirit accused another but of our brethren Revelat. 12. 10. it was a voice from heaven which called him so Saints on earth are the brethren of the glorious spirits in heaven It is the wickednes of that malicious spirit to accuse Saints But though the act be grown into hatred in respect both of the Agent and of the Object yet certainly there are cases wherein it will become the Saints to take upon them the person and office of accusers Accusation therefore is either voluntary or urged upon you by the charge of a superiour Voluntary is either such as you are moved unto by the Conscience of some hainous and notorious crime committed or to be committed by another to the great dishonour of God or danger of the common peace whereto you are privy or such as whereunto you are tyed by some former engagemeut of vow or oath In the former kinde a worthy Divine in our time travailing on the way sees a leud man committing abominable filthinesse with a beast the sinne was so foule and hatefull that his heart would not suffer him to conceale it hee therefore hastens to the next Justice accuses the offender of that so unnaturall villany the party is committed endicted and upon so reverend though single testimony found guilty Or if in the case of a crime intended you have secret but sure intelligence that a bloudy villaine hath plotted a treason against the sacred person of your Soveraigne or a murther of your honest neighbour which hee resolves to execute should you keep this fire in your bosome it might justly burn you Whether it be therefore for the discovery of some horrible crime done or for the prevention of some great mischief to be done you must either be an accuser or an accessary The obligation to accuse is yet stronger where your former vow or oath hath fore-ingaged you to a just discovery you have sworn to maintaine and defend his Majesty's royall Person State Dignity and to make knowne those that wilfully impugne it if now you shall keep the secret counsels of such wicked designments as you shall know to be against any of these how can you escape to bee involved in a treason lined with perjury These are accusations which your conscience will fetch from you unasked But if being called before lawfull authority you shall be required upon oath to testifie your knowledge even concerning offenders of an inferiour nature you may not detract your witnesse though it amount to no lesse than an Accusation Yet there are cases wherein a Testimony thus required tending to an accusation may be refused As in case of duty and nearenesse of naturall or civill relation It were unreasonably unjust for a man to be pressed with interrogations or required to give accusatory testimonies in the case of parents or children or the partner of his bed Or if a man out of remorse of conscience shall disclose a secret sin to you formerly done in a desire to receive counsaile and comfort from you you ought rather to endure your soule to be fetcht out of your body than that seeret to bee drawn out of your lips Or if the question be illegal as those that tend directly to your own prejudice or those which are moved concerning hidden offences not before notified by publique fame or any lawfull ground of injury which therefore the Judge hath no power to ask In these cases if no more the refusall of an accusation though required is no other than justifiable But where neither the conscience of the horridnesse of a crime done nor prevention of a crime intended nor duty of obedience to a lawfull authority nor the bond of an inviolable pre-ingagement call you to the Bar It is not a more uncharitable than thanklesse office to bee an accuser Hence it is that Delators and Informers have in all happy and well-governed States been ever held an infamous and odious kinde of Cattell A Tiberius and a Domitian might give both countenance and reward to them as being meet factors for their tyranny but a Vespasian and Titus and Antonius Pius and Macrinus or what ever other Princes carryed a tender care to the peace and welfare of their Subjects whipt them in the publique Amphitheater and abandoned them out of their dominions as pernicious and intolerable And as these mercenary Flies whether of State or of Religion are justly hatefull
of the father which may be prejudicial to the government of the family paternal pow'r which is sufficient for my purpose in the question in hand And although those Casuists doe sufficiently doat upon their Monkery and the vows thereunto appertayning yet they ascribe so much to the bond of filial duty as that they teach That a sonne which his parents being in extreme need and wanting his help enters into a religious order or comes not out of it though professed when hee might be likely by his coming forth to bee aidfull to his said Parents is guilty of a sin against the fift Commandement so as even with them the respect to a parent ought to overweigh a vow of religion although consummate by a solemn profession But that you may not object to me the age of the law as therefore abrogated because Mosaicall heare what the chosen vessell saies under the new law of the Gospel If any man thinke that he behaveth himselfe uncomely towards his virgin if shee passe the floure of her age and need so require let him doe what hee will hee sinneth not let her marry 1 Cor. 7. 36. Neverthelesse he that standeth stedfast in his heart having no necessity but hath power over his owne will and hath so decreed in his heart that he will keep his virgin doth well c. ver 37. Loe the Apostle supposeth it in the parents power either to keep his daughter a virgin or to dispose of her in marriage she is not her owne either to hold or give but must be altogether ordered by the superior will of a parent Not that any force is allowed either way to be used towards the daughter whether to continue her in a constrained virginity or to call her against her minde upon a dis-affected match No that God who disposeth all things sweetly would have us doe so too hee allowes parents to be rulers of their children but not tyrants what they doe therefore in this kinde must be more by councel then command and with more sway of love then authority thus consulting wisely with the state of times and the childs disposition and abilities of contayning must the parent either keep his virgin or labour for the provision of a meete consortship Thus did the two great Patriarchs of Gods ancient Church Abraham and Isaac provide fit matches for their holy seed whiles the unholy provided unfit matches for themselves Thus did their godly issue in all generations take their parents along with them in the choice of meet yoke-fellowes whiles the godless whether out of impetuous lust or stubborn disobedience affect with Esau Gen. 28. 6 7 8. to be their owne purveyors to the great regret and heart-breaking of their parents Lastly the latitude that S. Paul gives of the liberty of marriage to al Christians is Tantum in Domino onely in the Lord 1 Cor. 7. 39. Now how can that marriage bee in the Lord which is against him and how can that bee other then against the Lord which is against the Lords commandement And what commandment can be more express then Honor thy father and thy mother Gal. 6. 1. And Children obey your parents ver 2. And what can bee more contrary to the honour and obedience due to Parents then to neglect them in the main business that concernes our lives And what businesse can concern our life so much as the choice of a meet partner with whom we may comfortably weare out all the dayes of our pilgrimage on earth Doubtlesse then we may in a generality safely conclude that it is altogether unlawfull for a childe to sleight his Parents consent in the choice of his marriage There may be some particular cases incident wherein perhaps this may without sinne or blame be forborn as when the child either by general permission or former elocation shall be out of the Parents disposing or where the parent is defective in his intellectuals or where the child lives in remotis out of the compasse of intelligence or where the Parent being averse from the true Religion denies his consent to match with any but those of his own straine or shall upon other by-occasions wilfully stand upon so unreasonable terms that neither friends nor authority can over-rule him But where these or the like preponderating exceptions doe not intervene the child cannot without sin balk the Parents consent to his choice in marriage But though such marriages without or against consent bee not lawfully made yet being once made they are valid The civill law out of the grounds of policy goes herein too far which sentenceth those marriages void which are made without the consent of Parents of Guardians but as Matrimony hath somthing in it of Nature something of Civility something of Divinity as instituted by God and by him to be regulated so sure this last interest ought to over-sway the other two The marriage therefore thus made being though faulty yet true is doubtlesse after consummation indissoluble The parties repentance and the parents sorrow may have leisure to afflict them no power to relieve them CASE II. Whether Marriage lawfully made may admit of any cause of divorce save only for the violation of the marriage bed by Fornication or Adulterie OUr Saviour hath so punctually decided the case in his Divine Sermon upon the mount that I cannot but wonder at the boldnesse of any man who calls himself a Christian that dares raise a question after so full and clear a determination from the mouth of truth it self Whosoever saith he shall put away his wife saving for the cause of fornication causeth her to commit adultery and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery Mat. 5. 32. Yet I find this so evident an assertion checked by two sorts of adversaries The one certain wild Novellists who admit of very sleight causes of separation the other Romish Doctors who plead for some other main and important additions to this liberty of divorce I have heard too much of once saw a licentious Pamphlet thrown abroad in these lawlesse times in the defence and encouragement of Divorces not to be sued out that solemnity needed not but to be arbitrarily given by the disliking husband to his displeasing and unquiet wife upon this ground principally that Marriage was instituted for the help and comfort of man where therefore the match proves such as that the wife doth but pull downe a side and by her innate peevishnesse and either sullen or pettish and froward disposition brings rather discomfort to her husband the end of Marriage being hereby frustrate why should it not saith he be in the Husbands power after some unprevailing means of reclamation attempted to procure his own peace by casting off this clog and to provide for his own peace and contentment in a fitter Match Woe is me To what a passe is the world come that a Christian pretending to Reformation should dare to tender so loose a project to