pleased O how truly blessed are these enjoyments what soul can be now sad in this enquiry Lord I now solemnly resolve upon this safe this sweet this blessed task I willingly abandon all excuses that may hinder me and joyfully embrace those happy duties which invite me nearer to thy heavenly presence thy yoak is easie and thy burthen light when thy grace hath redeemed me from the bondage of sin and restored me into the glorious liberty of thy child en I shall then find to my souls comfort that thy service is perfect freâ—domâ— from sin from shame from death from hell from all miseries here from all torments hereafter Be warie therefore O my soul and carefull to remove all lets that may disable thee but those especially that turn me from a Christian to a beast Satan hath many wayes to couzen me when he cannot beguile my judgâ—ment he will betray mine affections and lead me by a seeming good in friendly society to aâ—â— call evill in excess and so when he cannot corrupt my intentions he will undoubtedly divert mine actions as well knowing it is impossible for him to be devout who is not temperate Lord by how much Satan is more powerfull and malicious by so much make me more wise and circumspect that my intentions may be good my words gracious my actions vertuous my life holy my death happy Blessed God How large a portion of my little time have I bestowed on sin how eager have I been of it how negligent in asking pardon for it Lord pardon my unmindfulness of holy duties make me more watchfull for the time to come that I may constantly resolve upon amendment of my evill wayes and willingly endure thy fatherly afflictions for them Forgive those sinfull houres that have unfitted me for thy service suffer me not O Lord to wander in the waies of wickedness and when at any time the frailty of my wretched flesh shall tempt me to exceed those blessed bounds which thou hast set me O let thy saving grace restrain me let not this sinfull freedom captivate my precious soul to thy dishonour and mine own deserved shame but let thy gladding Spirit be my joyfull comfort to refresh me in life and protect me in death Make me more zealous more intent upon the wayes of godliness Lord suffer not my pious resolutions to abate with any outward obstacles let me not lean upon these broken reeds but rest on thee the rock of my defence and safety Make me content to leave these earthly vanities for thy sake who wert willing to forgoe Thy heavenly Throne for mine though the frailty of my nature hath too often led me into the bondage of sin yet let the freedome of thy grace now guide me into the footsteps of sorrow that this blessed sorrow may be turned into joy and that this joy the world may not take from me Lord open mine eyes that I may see the blessednesse of goodnesse the perfect freedome of thy service the glorious liberty of thy children so shall I willingly submit to thy commands and joyfully partake of thy rewards Blessed God with humblenesse of soul I offer up my self unto thee Lord Jesus accept of me and so assist me with thy grace that I may wholly dedicate my self to thy glory Amen CHAP. 23. Upon Unchristianlike dulnesse in affliction Lord I cannot live without crosses unlesse I can live without sin when they come therefore I will bid them welcome for thy sake from whom they are sent not one of them can afflict me without thy leave who hast directed their course limited their power let me not repine at that which I have justly dâ—served let me rather rejoyce that thou vouchsafest me this favour if I were not thy child I should not be under thy rod if thou Lord didst not love me thou wouldst not scourge me no outward thing can so well assure me of thy favour as the fellowship of thy sufferings for if I suffer with thee I shall assuredly be glorified together with thee Holy David was in trouble and it was good for him O let not that which was good for him be evill for me Lord if thy physick be bitter yet it is wholsome if it make me heart-sick now it will make me healthfull hereafter if I disturb it not by mine impatience it will work in me the quiet and the happy fruits of true repentance and amendment of mine evill waies it will remember me that I am a Stranger and a Pilgrim here that there is nothing in this life but wearine e and sorrow it will drive me from the penury of sin and tyranny of Satan to the riches of grace and liberty of goodnesse it will encourage me to walk worthy of the richnesse of my calling in Christ Jesus it will make me willing to goe home to thee my heavenly Father where I shall feel no more pain find no more sorrow suffer no more affliction where thou Lord wilt wipe away all tears from mine eyes all grief from my heart Thou O Lord alone knowest my disease and canst best temper my potion each degree must be answered so much sinfull pleasure as I enjoy so much sorrow must I drink and woe be unto me for ever if I drink it not if I tast not of this cup here I shall drink of the very dregs in hell Thou O Lord who hast freely forgiven me my sins hast not fully remitted my punishments thou who didst undergoe the misery of life and the bitternesse of death for me hast neither bought off the one nor taken off the other from me by thy sufferings I am fully and for ever freed from the guilt and torments of sin by mine own corruptions I am liable unto the act of sin and so even unto death allso as a temporall punishment for sin Thou camest not O Lord wholly to abolish sin in me but to become righteousnesse and sanctification and redemption unto me not to abate my sorrows but to uphold my sufferings that I being thereby made conformable unto thee in grace may hereafter be partaker with thee of thy heavenly glory How fearfull ought this to make me to commit sin how carefull to avoid occasions of allurements to it how thankfull how joyfull to receive Gods Fatherly chastisements for it I may here see and joyfully admire the wisedome justice goodnesse mercy of my heavenly Father his justice in punishing sin his wisedome in the proportion and end of this punishment his goodnesse by susteining me under it by redeeming me from it his mercy by making it to work for me a far more exceeding and eternall weight of glory Lord he that can droop under thy Crosse shall never follow thee to thy Crown when I once find the lightnesse of this load by the strength of thy supporting grace I shall then feel to my souls exceeding comfort that one sin is of more weight than an age of sorrow And now Lord I am joyfully prepared for the worst
depraved nature this sin had doubtless been a sad memoriall to my grave such is the power of sin once grown habituall O let my sorrowfull confession be the readers usefull instruction that thou mayst have the glory I the shame of my mis-doing Lord I have often sinned against thee by my wretched violation of the truth in envious detractions from the good of my neighbour vain-glorious aggravations of mine own abilities censorious taxations of my brethrens infirmities indulgent diminutions of mine own iniquities I have often grieved thy good Spirit by which thou hast sealed me up unto the day of redemption by my vain and idle communications by my rash and sinfull exprobations by my weak and froward objurgations to the great dishonour of thee my God to the cominuall grief of thy Saints to the sad disturbance of my self All this to my hearts grief have I often done and by all this I may now plainly see how much I have hitherto been the servant of sin and Satan how great an enemy to thy glory and to the good of mine own soul But now Lord by thine assistance my speciall care shall henceforth be to allow my self no liberty of speech but what is aiming at Eternity if my heart be heavenly my words will be gratious my actions holy mine end happy and that all this may be so indeed by thy grace Lord I will observe with carefulness and constancy these following cautions 1. Before I speak I will consider that I am in thy blessed presence that what is once â—pâ—kâ—n can never be recalled but is recorded for eterternity 2. That each idle word must be accounted for and that my whole life hitherto hath been little else but vain and empty discourse tending much to thy dishonor the hurt of my neighbour and without mercy in Christ the destruction of my own soul 3. That there is no truer testimony of a graceless heart than a licentious tongue that if I be not holy in my discourse I can never be happy in mine actions 4. That it is impossible for those prayers to be pleasing to God which are offered up with that sinfull member that is so shamefully defiled with evill and corrupt communications amongst men 5. That if I make a mock at Christianity by having onely a form of godliness in mine outward actions but denying the power thereof in my usuall conversation God will one day pay me home by shewing me the richness of his sufferings but denying me the benefits thereof and the sweet enjoyments thereby 6. That without helinesse no man shall see the Lord and that such as is my common and most accustomed discourse in my life I may well fear will be my last and most uncomfortable expressions at my death 7. Unto all this I will adde the shortnesse misery and uncertainty of a sinfull life the horrour and amazement of a wretched death the extremity and eternity of torments after death Lord when my heart is thus guarded by thy grace my lips I trust will be ever open to thy praise Blessed God If thy holy Angell durst not give railing accusations against the devill if thy Sainss in patience possesse their own soules and their speeches he seasoned with salt administring grace to the hearts of the hearers if thou the blessed Saviour of the world when thou wert reviled reviledst not again but as a lamb before the shearers so openedst thou not thy mouth with what comfort can I now appear before thee with what confidence expect a blessing from thee With grief and sorrow I confesse that my heart hath ever been full of corruption and naughtinesse my mouth full of cursing and bitternesse my daily discourse full of folly and uncleannesse the whole course of my life full of misery and wickednesse O that my head were water and mine eyes a fountain of tears that I might weep day and night that I might mourn continually for mine own and others sins Lord purifie my heart and rectifie my tongue that both may be accepted of thee and now and ever graciously directed by thee Lord I acknowledge my faults and my sin is ever before me O let the sorrowfull remembrance of my sins invite thee to a sweet remembrance of thy mercies that thou mayest have the praise and I the comfort of thy gracious pardon Lord let my heart be inflamed with thy love and my mouth filled with thy praise that I may sacrifile my oul unto thee that I may sanctifie my soul before thee by devout thoughts by gracious words and godly actions that so I may with joyfulnesse and thankfulnesse appear in thy fight not onely all the day long but even all my life long that thou my God mayst be glorified thy Saints delighted and my sinfnll foul eternally comforted Amen CHAP. 39. Upon holy revenge for sin with motives and encouragements thereunto Lord I Have ever been too apt to revenge the smallest injuries offered unto me by others in relation to mine outward condition and too remiss in that holy revenge of those great and insufferable wrongs which I daily and hourly obtrude upon mine own soul this plainly sheweth me to have been too much savouring of flesh and blood too little mindfull of thy kingdom and the righteousness thereof That soul which is truly sensible of its own injury will by thy grace be dayly minding of its own redresle and that sinner which is uncapable of slight offences will in time become insensible of greater My greatest enemies are those of mine own houshold The world may allure me the devill perswade me but it is mine own false heart alone that betrayes me and mine own corrupt nature that enslaves me my greatest care shall therefore be to bend my strongest force against mine own corruptions to labour much to subdue mine affections and to take an holy revenge upon my sinfull actions not to satisfie thy justice but to implore thy mercie that I may thereby truly manifest my perfect hatred against sin and the sincerity of my soul to thy service There need none other motives to invite me to this holy duty than the wofull breaches sin hath daily made in my soul such as without mercy will never be repaired this is too sadly proved by the sensible decay of goodnesse and the too powerfull growth of ungodlinesse in my corrupt heart as it is easie for that Castle to stand a close siege that is well fortified man'd and victualled so is it impossible for that Fort to hold out long which maketh no resistance Lord as mine own spirituall ruins have hitherto been caused by mine own neglects so by thy gratious assistance mine own repairs shall be begun and finished by my present desires and future endeavours That time which I have lost by former carelesnesse and coldnesse in Religion I will endeavour to redeem by holy vigilance and Christian fortitude and that I may sincerely be what I intend with willingness of heart I offer up this solemn Vow unto
subordinate to this sweetness Christian liberty may be easily mistaken and become licentious wickedness there is often-times most danger in those things which seem most necessary if not used with moderation And now Lord having seriously considered what time is and wherefore I admire the folly and lament the misery of all those whose onely aim is to mis-spend it My dayes are few and full of evil O let my greatest care be to husband my time well I have much business and great to dispatch and I know not whether this dayes lâ—ght may be my last Mine eternity of joy or sorrow hath its dependance on this short moment If I think upon it seriously I shall grudge to spend one minute vainly Lord there is no distinction of time with thee one day with thee is as a thousand years and a thousand years as one day O let me seriously consider that with me there is that I must work while it is called to day that mine houres are swift and short that the night of death cometh when I cannot work that the end of all things cometh when time shall be no more By thy grace therefore I will piously devote the remnant of my life to holy duties so shall mine age of sin be nothing in thy sight and one day well spent in thy remembrance as a thousand years Blessed Lord Wilt thou accept of such a sinfull creature as I am to appear before thee to approach unto thee to sue to thee for mercy How bold am I to look up unto thee with these adulterous eyes that have so long been gazing on these earthly joyes how much presuming on thy mercy to implore thee with that tongue that hath so much provoked thy displeasure how impudent to offer that disloyall heart unto thee that hath so fast been wedded to this sinfull world Lord when mine own wretchedness had brought thy gracious visitation on me when thy hand pressed me sore when thine arrows stuck fast in me and the venome of them drank up my spirits when my heart was in hcaviness and my soul in bitterness when my life was drawing near unto the grave when mine own conscience pleaded powerfully against me and the terrors of a second death were ready to devour me I then earnestly implored thee for mercy and thou freely forgavest me I then begged my life of thee that I might thankfully devote the remnant of my life unto thee Ah Lord how wretchedly hath mine own heart deceived me what serious vows and faithfull promises did I then make unto thee and yet how carelesly how foolishly am I departed from thee how vainly have I trifled out that precious time which thou hast given me how justly mayst thou now deprive me of this wretched life by which I have so much dishonored thee And now Lord when I have even wearied out my self in wickedness when my soul is overcharged with sin and my heart with sorrow when the vanity of this life is ready to forsake me and there is nothing left but misery and shame to seize upon me I have not yet resolved seriously to come unto thee Lord leave me not unto the weaknesse of mine own infirmities expose mee not unto the raging hillowes of these strong temptations suffer me not to sink into this depth of sin to be destroyed by this dreadful storm of Satan and mine own accusing conscience rebuke these windes and waves and cause a blessed calm within me reach out thy hand of mercy and support me strengthen my drooping soul that I may joyfully and faithfully lay hold upon thee give me a fixed heart that I may seriously return unto thee and may this hour be graciously accepted of thee Lord wean me from the false imbraces of this evill world turn all these sinfull joyes to bitterness unto mee make me to see their foulnesse and deformity their emptinesse and vanity their shortness and uncertainty their falshood and flattery their wearinesse and misery O let my heart be filled let my soul be ravished with those transcendent joyes of thine which are for ever give me a joyfull soul to rest securely in them a ready heart devoutly thankfull for them Lord moderate my desires to outward injoyments let me rellish no sweetnesse but in thy love no goodnesse but in thy grace no comfort but in the full assurance of thy glory Forgive those wretched houres which have been stoln from thy service O Lord my God I heartily bewail them and willingly resolve to spend my days in sorrow for them Make me more watchfull over my corrupt heart more carefull of my precious time more serious in the weighty work of my salvation more sorrowfull for sin more mindfull of the hour of death and day of judgejudgement That so I may affect the pleasures of this life soberly enjoy them sparingly and leave them cheerfully Amen CHAP. 20. Upon the great danger of deferring the hour of repentance COnsider O my Soul of the great danger of delaying thy repentance of judging that so easy which will prove so difficult of thinking that allmost finisht which is scarce yet begun Believest thou it will suffice thee to have some transitory thoughts of thine amendment to have perhaps some pinching sighs some stings of conscience some shews of sorrow for thy sins to hang down thy head like a bulrush for a day and yet afterwards to return with the dog to thy filthy vomit and with the sow to the wallowing in the nasty mire of sin While thou continuest in this course thy hopes of amendment are extreme doubtfull of reconciliation dangerous of repentance desperate If ever thou hopest to inherit heaven let not Satan thus delude thee look well into thine evill and corrupt heart and thou shalt there find that this is not the cure but the discase of sin that thou grievest not for thine offence but for thy punishment that thou mayst yet go much farther in this supposed path of thy repentance and still be far short of that sincerity of heart which God requireth of thee and yet have no part nor fellowship in Christ Thou mayst with Saul express thy sorrow with thy tears with those Beleevers in the Gospel receive the word with joy with Demas shew thine inward grace by thine outward obedience and in some sort be made partaker of the Holy Ghost and have a tast of the good things of the world to come and yet for all this come far short of this unfeigned work of true repentance Alass what can it profit thee to bewail that sin which thou wilt not forgo what reward canst thou expect for that obedience which so soon fainteth what comfort in that joy which is but temporary Remember how great a work thou hast in hand how many millions of lost souls complain eternally in hell of this neglect O look into the foulness of thy sin and then into the trueness of thy sorrow If thou art Gods child thou wilt be grieved for offending of so good
a Father thou wilt abhor that sin that hath so much provoked his displeasure thou wilt most solemnly protest against it and seriously resolve for ever to avoyd it thy sin will be ever before thee to humble thee here to exalt thee hereafter Thy degrees of sin will have thy degrees of sorrow thy measure of pollution will require thy measure of sanctification As thou hast given up thy members to be servants of sin so thou must now yeeld them up to be weapons of righteousness as thou hast been drowned in pleasure so thou must be drencht in tears yea those tears will be thy dayly food to nourish thee in grace to enrich thee in glory O how truly-blessed is that soul which hath unfeignedly resolved on this good this great this necessary work that can cheerfully and joyfully express it self with holy David and say Lord I am bowed down greatly I goe mourning all the day long I have roared out for very anguish and unquietness of heart If thou hast Davids sorrow O my soul thou shalt assuredly have Davids joy thou shalt say with him allso Lord I am thy child and the son of thine handmaid thou hast broken my bonds in sunder Psal 116.16 Satan may now tempt thee and through thy frailty and infirmity prevail against thee but to become a customer to evill the powers of hell cannot entice thee a thousand worlds are not now of that value with thee as the joyfull remembrance of thy passed dangers thy present comfort thy future safety Thou hast now seen O my soul how absolutely necessary this great work is think now how happy will be the performance how full of danger the delay the longer thou continuest in sin the more remote thou art from grace What extreme folly is this in thee to deprive thy self of that friend of whom thou hast most need If thou findest thy self so backward to this holy duty now how averse wilt thou be hereafter when sin is more deeply rooted in thee the devill in more firm possession of thee and God himself removed further off from thee From whence now are these false hopes these vain promises of future happiness how darest thou refuse these gracious offers of eternity how full of doubtfulness and extreme hazard is this false assurance of that holy Spirit which thou hast so often grieved Be not deceived God is not mocked look what a man soweth even that shall he reap he that soweth in the flesh shall reap corruption he that soweth in the Spirit life everlasting If thou wilt not hear Gods call in this life he will not hear thine in that to come if thou wilt not mourn for thy sins here thou shalt howl for them for ever And who shall then have pitty upon thee or who shall be sorry for thee or who shall pray for thy peace thou hast abandoned me saith God thou hast gone from me and now will I stretch out my hand against thee to destroy thee Jerem. 15.5 6 Lord let this teach me to deal truly with my self to search narrowly for sin timely for sorrow and speedily for pardon Seek the Lord O my soul while he may be found for in the great water-floods of his eternall wrath thou shalt not come nigh him Lord I have sinned and I desire to repent I have layen long festering in the grave of sin and cannot be now raised without a miracle I have sinned in delight in consent in action in custom in long continuance of custom without remorse of conscience without thought of repentance I am grown old and impudent in sin and am no more worthy to be called thy child Lord I am become loathsom to my self how much more odious unto thee who art a God of pure eyes and canst behold none iniquitie I have sinned against thee I cannot repent but by thee my transgression is active my obedience passive I can no more arise from sin than death even this desire of sorrow is from thee the repair of my corruption is the work of thy creation when thou hast raised me by thy grace thou supportest me by thy goodnesse thou leadest me by thy providence thou drawest me by thy patience thou compellest mee by thy power Such is my weakness such is my feebleness by nature that I cannot rise without thee that I cannot stand without thee when I am raised by thee such is my strength such is my ability by grace that I am able to go with thee that I am joyfull to run after thee Lord quicken and revive me from the death of sin and grave of misery sustain my wounded conscience with the sweetness of thy saving promises let thy patience and long-suffering lead me in to repentance thy holy Spirit unto perfect holiness and endless happiness Lord Jesus draw me and I shall joyfully run after thee my body in obedience to my soul my soul and body in obedience to thy blessed will more zealously more willingly more constantly to my lives end Amen CHAP. 21. Upon Servile fear and the danger thereof NO child can fear his father as lie ought that is not jealous of his fathers honour that is not feelingly affected with his injuries and zealously devoted to perpetuate his praise and it is as equally impossible that this father can affect that son whose obedience is rather enforced by power than invited by affection If this be so in Nature it is much more so in Grace for thou O Lord art now a double father to me thou art my father by creation and my father by redemption Lord as thou hast doubled thy goodness towards me I should have doubled my return of thankfulness towards thee Thy love to me is absolute no breach can dissolve it no time determine it thy love to me was from the beginning and whom thou lovest thou lovest to the end My love to thee is fickle false and full of imperfections and if my filiall fear even in my rest performances be full of spots and blemishes in thy sight how most deformed shall I appear when I serve thee with an irreligious and ungodly fear when I doe thy will repiningly and coldly not for love of thy mercy but for fear of thy justice when I am knowingly and willingly consenting to thy great dishonour when I am so zealous in the worlds cause yea too too often in the devils cause and so benummed in thine when sorrows dismay me and sins delight me Ah Lord how far am I from what I ought to be If I go on in this path I perish everlastingly while I continue in this course of disobedience I hang over hell fire by the slender twig of an uncertain life and if that once break my loss is irrecoverable Thou Lord hast sayd it and thy word is truth He which denieth me before men him will I deny before my Father which is in heaven Lord let this teach me to delight in thy service to be jealous of thine honor to thirst for thy
of afflictions which either sin or Satan life or death can bring upon me scourge me launce me bruise me break me doe what thou wilt with me here so thou spare me for ever Lord allthough thou killest me yet will I trust in thee for I know assuredly that all these outward things shall work together for the best for me and that my present sufferings thou hast sent in mercy to me to humble me for sin to preserve me from shame I kisse them I embrace them and am sincerely thankfull for them Lord let me clearly see for what sin thou hast inflicted this punishment that I may bewail it abhor it forsake it implore thy pardon for it when I am thus armed I shall be able to encounter thy fiercest affliction if I am found naked the weakest will foyl me To thee O Lord whose wise and over-ruling hand disposeth all occurrences of life and sweetly guides them to the good of thy children doe I addresse my sinfull soul for mercy and protection Lord open mine eyes that I may see and believe the constancy of thy love in the mutability of mine outward condition Give me a patient and a willing heart to welcome all the changes of this present life to be humble under them to rejoyce in them and be thankfull for them Forgive the pride of heart and prodigality of hand attending on my prosperous estate my great repinings and ungodly passions incident to my declining happinesse and increasing misery As thou hast weaned me from the pleasures of this life by the rod of thine afflictions so wean me allso from the sins of this life by the staff of thy consolations that so my heart may be wholly taken off from all earthly enjoyments that I may become even as a weaned child to forgoe willingly what thou deniest me to receive quietly what thou providest for me What I want of these outward blessings supply â—nto me by thine inward comforts which are inâ—finitely better for me and shall be therefore â—ver dearer to me Lord furnish me with graces suitable to all events and able to encourage me in all afflictions Lord sanctifie this present sorrow to my sinfull soul so sweeten it by thy grace that it may bring forth in me the quiet and the happy fruits of righteousnesse Make it a sure pledge of thy fatherly affections towards me let it daily and hourely draw me nearer to thy presence let it wean me from the miseries of sin and at last bring me to the sweet fruition of eternitie Amen CHAP. 24. Upon Unchearfulness in Christianity with incouragements to avoyd it AH Lord from whence is my uncheerfulness my dulness in my Christian calling how much below that glorious hope which thou hast given me When I consider of the richness of thy love in Christ I find thee to be all in all unto me and may well wonder at mine own unthankfulness and ignorance that is stll doting on this worlds nothing and uncertainty Thou O Lord art truly and eternally good and therefore able to derive eternity of happiness Before I was created I was thine and when I was not mine own thou becamest mine thou O my Saviour who hast given me thy sâ—lf canst deny me nothing What is too good too great too glorious for that soâ—â— which thou hast redeemed at so dear a rate â—s the price of thine own blood and espoused to thine own bosom Thy creatures are at peace with me thy holy Angels attend me guard me fight for me rejoyce at my conversion thy Saints triumphant pray for me the Devils fly from me and thou O Lord by thine all-mighty power and gracious providence art ever with me thou carest for me from the cradle to the tomb Thou art about my bed and about my paths and spyest out all my waies Yea Thy mercy embraceth me on every side when I sleep I am safe when I awake joyfull in prosperity I have thy rod to afflict me in adversity thy staffe to comfort me Lord while I am in thy favour I can look no way but to happiness if I walk not answerable to it I may well fear to be deprived of it And doubtless O my soul those eyes which look so graciously upon thee in this life will behold thee with a more earnest with a more endeared love in that to come these transitory glances are but the faithfull pledges of those future embraces Those arms of mercy which now support thee in thine often failings shall then encompass thee with glory those blessed hands which now chastise thee for thy rebellions will then wipe away all tears from thine eyes and that relenting heart which sometimes is most unwillingly withdrawn from thee for thy Apostasie will then unite it self to thine for ever Lord who can be a Christian and be sad who can believe all this and not triumph in joyfull exaltation and not insult over the sorrows of this life and not contemn the joyes of this bewitching world and not resist these cloudy discontented thoughts these close assaults of Satans never-resting malice Millions of Worlds Miriads of Angels cannot restore that cursed spirit to this happiness which thou now enjoyest and yet so slightly regardest O let this teach thee to abhor his foul temptations to consider of thy worth in Christ and to raise thy self above the reach of earthly misery to love thy God faithfully to serve him cheerfully to persevere joyfully to be patient in tribulation to rejoyce in hope to pray continually to thirst after the sweetness of his grace and earnestly to long for the consummation of his glory Blessed God How unworthy am I to be called thy servant who have so long been subject to the worlds commands how undeserving of the glorious liberty of thy Sons who have so willingly been fetter'd by mine own corruptions how uncapable of thy heavenly comforts that can rejoyce in nothing but these earthly vanities Lord open mine eyes that I may see the richness of the price of my high calling in Christ Jesus and endeavour to walk worthy of it that I may earnestly desire thee joyfully embrace thee and constantly and cheerfully devote my service to thee Forgive my drowsiness my dulness my backwardness to holy duties awake my sinfull soul from sensuallity and raise it to the blessed thoughts of sweet eternity Compassionate my weakness accept my willingness forgive my sinfulness quicken my dulness correct my untowardness Lord bring me to such a blessed frame of heart that I may willingly forgo the sins and miseries of this life and frequently delight my self with contemplation of thy joyes in that to câ—me CHAP. 25. Upon Mans sinfull frailtie in the hour of Temptation with motives to make resistance I Am now in the lists with Satan and this hour to fight the Lords battail God seeth me and his holy Angels see me I have long professed my self to be Christs souldier and he hath now brought me to the field to prove me now is
frailties commiserate his infirmities forgive his iniquities Lord purge him by thy pretious blood cloath him with thine own righteousnesse inrich him with thy blessed merits and plead them to thy Father for him O thou holy and for ever blessed Spirit who art the pure fountain of eternall love be present with him relieve and comfort him in all these bitter pangs of his last hour indue him with a willingnesse and cheerfulnesse to leave this transitory life and crown him with eternity of joyes in that to come And now O Lord we come unto thee for our selves who are here at this time upon our sinfull knees before thee Lord open our eyes that we may seriously consider of that last and solemn hour of our departure Lord sanctifie our hearts that while we are encompassed with sinfull flesh we may lament our often failings and infirmities and every day be more and more desirous to goe home to thee who art the God of spirits Lord give us grace that we may walk soberly and righteously and holily as becometh thy children that at the resurrection of the just our soules and bodies may enjoy the blessed consummation of their endlesse happinesse Lord hear our prayers and let our cries come unto thee for thy name sake for thy promise sake for thy blessed Sons sake Amen The Conclusion BLessed Lord God by whose onely mercy I have finished this imperfect Work as I began it by thy goodnesse so I desire to end it with thy praise Lord accept of it and graciously afford thy blessing to it Let not the weaknesse and the sinfulnesse of me the Instrument be the Readers discouragement but give glory and honour to thee the Agent for of thee and through thee and to thee are all things to thee be praise for ever Amen SOLI DEO GLORIA For the comfort and assistance of those that are ready to depart this life I have hereunto added the dying Confession of Mr. Anthâ—ny Sadler Minister of Gods Word at West-Thorock in Essex of which I was an Ear-witness Obiit vicesimo die Maii Anno 1643. THE Lord hath laid a gratious and a gentle visitation on me I doe acknowledge with a thankfull heart that this weakness of body this languishing of nature these painfull daies and nights are from him For misery cometh not out of the dust neither doth affliction spring out of the earth Job 5.6 Ah my friends little doe men think how much the great disturbances of sickness how much he pains and infirm ties of a dec ying body distract those blessed thoughts those sweet and happy meditations which the troubled soul desires The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak Lord Jesus strengthen the inward man and lay no more upon this sinfull bâ—dy than thou in mercy shalt enable it to bear I am now verily perswaded that God hath purposed to determine my daies his blessed will be done even so Lord Jesus come quickly He that looketh into his life past that ransaketh his soul and calleth to minde the sinfull failings of his youth will finde it very hard and difficult to make his calling and election sure I have earnestly desired to leave no corner of my soul unsearcht and I finde my self to be a very great and wretched sinner I have committed grievous sinnes very grievous sinnes such sinnes as are not fit to be named before God's Saints I have examined my soul by each particular Commandment and I finde my self guilty of the breach of all and that in an high manner especially considering that weighty Function God's providence hath called me unto I have not onely sinned against mine own soul but against the soules of others too whom I have corrupted by my ill example and that very often And now when I look upon the glasse of the Law and there see mine owne vildnesse I finde Gods justice and mine own deserts even ready to surprise and cast me down into the nethermost hell and that most righteously But O see the goodnesse of a gratious God! I now come to lay hold upon the promises but how not without repentance not presumingly I apply them not in a generall but particular way I doe not onely believe that Christ Jesus came iâ— to the World to save sinners but I believe allso that he died for my sinnes and rose again for my justification God hath promised and all his promises are Yea and Amen that he will not forsake those which trust in him nay he hath bound himself unto it by an oath by two immutable things which cannot fail his Truth and his Holinesse Heb. 6.18 and God hath said That he which confesseth and forsaketh his sinnes shall finde mercy 1 Joh. 1.9 I acknowledge them I confesse them I am grieved for them I forsake them I abhorre themwhat should I doe more God requireth not more of me These pauses were supplied with tears and yet for all this I cannot find my self assured of his favour methinkes this sorrow is not so hearty as it ought to be and yet I know and stedfastly believe that if God did not work with me this sorrow could not be and where he worketh there can be nothing wanting I know that the most righteous man alive cannot perform this work so perfectly as he ought and therefore I believe that he which is ascended up on high hath done it for me in that full and ample manner which is able to appease his Father's wrath and I now trust that by his perfect obedience this imperfect worke of mine shall find a gratious acceptation This is my hope and this my beliefe Nay I can goe yet a little further to strengthen my assurance that my peace is made with God I every day and every houre doe pray unto my Saviour to intercede his Father for me and if I implore him he will intercede his Father and if he intercede his Father he cannot be denied O my God impute my sinnes to him transferre his righteousnesse to me and then I know I shall appear a glorious soul before thee Amen FINIS THE CONTENTS CHAP. 1. UPon the sinfulnesse of our thoughts touching the sacred Deity with holy cautions to order our devotions aright pag. 2. CHAP. 2. Upon the consideration of God's love and man's unthankfulnesse A Meditation suited to the morning pag. 9 CHAP. 3. Upon the consideration of Divine Providence A Meditation for noon pag. 14 CHAP. 4. Upon the consideration of the sinfulnesse shortnesse and uncertainâ—y of life A Meditation suited to the evening pag. 17 CHAP. 5. Upon our approaching unto God's House with necessary cautions for our behaviour there pag. 20 CHAP. 6. Upon our returning from God's House and the neglect of private duties pag. 24 CHAP. 7. Upon the want of due preparation for Receiving of the Lord's Supper pag. 27 CHAP. 8. Containing pious Ejaculations at the time of Receiving pag. 30 CHAP. 9. Containing a brief Meditation and pious Thanksgiving after our Receiving pag. 31 CHAP. 10. Upon a Journey undertaken and the many dangers incident thereunto pag. 32 CHAP. 11. Containing pious Meditations and zealous Ejaculations after a Journey pag. 34 CHAP. 12. Upon the great danger of Security pag. 37 CHAP. 13. Upon the great danger of Prosumption pag. 41 CHAP. 14. Upon quenching of the motions of God's holy Spirit pag. 47 CHAP. 15. Upon the consideration of God's peculiar Providence to his Children pag. 51 CHAP. 16. Upon sinfull Anger and the great disturbance thereof pag. 55 CHAP. 17. Upon Man's inordinate love to the Creature pag. 58 CHAP. 18. Upon the sin of Uncleaness with Incouragements to avoid it pag. 63 CHAP. 19. Upon immoderate Mirth and the great Inconveniencies thereof pag. 67 CHAP. 20. Upon the great danger of deferring the hour of Repentance pag. 75 CHAP. 21. Upon Servile Fear and the danger thereof pag. 79 CHAP. 22. Upon the great neglect of reckoning daily with our Thoughts and the benefits lost thereby pag. 84 CHAP. 23. Upon Unchristian-like Dulnesse in Affliction pag. 87 CHAP. 24. Upon uncheerfulnesse in Christianitie with Incouragements to avoyd it pag. 91 CHAP. 25. Upon mans sinfull frailty in the hour of Temptation with Motives to make resistance pag. 94 CHAP. 26. Upon the Infirmitie of the Saints pag. 97 CHAP. 27. Upon Desertion pag. 101 CHAP. 28. Upon sudden danger pag. 106 CHAP. 29. Upon the weaknesse of Faith and sinfulnesse of Thoughts tending to Despair pag. 107 CHAP. 30. Upon the great Neglect of the duty of Prayer pag. 111 CHAP. 31. Upon the great neglect of Reading the sacred Scriptures pag. 114 CHAP. 32. Upon the neglect of Divine Meditation pag. 117 CHAP. 33. Upon Unchristian-like Dejectedness in Poverty pag. 119 CHAP. 34. Upon Sickness and ungodly repining thereat pag. 122 CHAP. 35. Upon the misery of Life and blessednesse of Death pag. 126 CHAP. 36. Upon the great neglect of opportunities in doing good to the Saints pag. 131 CHAP. 37. Upon the deceitfulnesse of the heart in the performance of holy duties pag. 135 CHAP. 38. Upon the unrulinesse of the Tongue with necessary cautions to restrain it pag. 140 CHAP. 39. Upon holy revenge for sin with motives and incouragements thereunto pag. 144 CHAP. 40. Upon the blessed condition of the Saints with motives and encouragements unto Godlinesse pag. 147 A comfortable Prayer to be used at the point of Death by the Visitors of the Sick pag. 157 FINIS