naturally an eloquent Orator yet the bare truth of his worthy Virtues and Heroical actions will be sufficient to make the story both profitable delightfull and famous also I must intreat you to choose out a Poet one that doth not meerly write for gain or to express his own wit so much as to endeavour to Pencil with the pen Virtue to the life which in my Lord was so beautifull as it was beyond all draughts but the theam will inspire his Muse and when both these works are writ printed and set out as divulged to the World as a patern for examples which few will be able to imitate then I would have these books ly by me as Registers of memory for next unto the Gods my life shall be spent in Contemplation of him I know I shall not need to perswade you to do this for your affection to his memory is ready of it self but love and duty binds me to express my desires for his Fame leaving nothing which is for my part thereunto Doctor Educature Madam all the service I can do towards the memory of my dear Pupil and noble Lord and Patron shall be most devoutly observed and followed for Heaven knows if I had as many lives to dispose of as I have lived years I would have Sacrificed them all for to haue redeemed his life from Death Doctor Educature goes out Madam Jantil alone Madam Iantil. When I have interred my Husbands body and all my desires thereunto be finished I shall be at some rest and like an Executrix to my self executing my own will distributing the Rites and Ceremonies as Legacies to the dead thus the living gives the dead but O my Spirits are tired with the heavy burden of Melancholy and grow faint for want of rest yet my senses invite me thereunto yet I cannot rest in my Bed for frightfull Dreams disturb me wherefore I will ly down on this floor and try if I can get a quiet sleep on the ground for from Earth I came and to Earth I would willingly return She lays her self down upon the ground on one side of her Arm bowing leaning upon her Elbow her Forehead upon the palm of her hand bowing forwards her face towards the ground but her grief elevating her passion thus speaks Madam Iantil. Weep cold Earth through your pores weep Or in your bowels my salt tears fast keep Inurn my sighs which from my grief is sent With my hard groans build up a Monument My Tongue like as a pen shall write his name My words as letters to divulge his fame My life like to an Arch over his Ashes bend And my desires to his grave descend I warn thee Life keep me not Company I am a friend to Death thy Enemy For thou art cruell and every thing torments Wounding with pain all that the World presents But Death is generous and sets us free Breaks off our Chains and gives us liberty Heals up our wounds of trouble with sweet rest Draws our corrupted passions from our breast Layes us to sleep on Pillows of soft case Rocks us with silence nothing hears nor sees She fetches'a great sigh O that I may here sleep my last After a short slumber she wakes If it were not for Dreams sleep would be a happiness next unto Death but I find I cannot sleep a long sleep in Death I shall not dye so soon as I would Love is so strong and pure it cannot dy Lives not in sense but in the Soul doth lye Why do I mourn his love with mine doth dwell His love is pleas'd mine entertains it well But mine would be like his one imbodied Only an Essence or like a Godhead Exeunt Scene 22. Enter Doctor Comfort and Doll Pacify DOctor Comfort How doth our Lady Doll Doll Pacify To day she began to sit up but yet she is very weak and faint Doctor Comfort Heaven help her Doll Pacify You that are Heavens Almner should distribute Heavens gifts out of the purse of your mouth and give her single Godly words instead of single silver pence to buy her some Heavenly food to feed her famisht mind Doctor Comfort Thou are a full-fed wench Doll Pacify If I were no better fed than you feed me which is but once a week as on Sundayes I should be starved Doctor Comfort You must fast and pray fast and pray Exeunt ACT V. Scene 23. Enter two Gentlemen 1 GEnt. All the young Gallants in the Town are preparing themselves with fine Cloths and Feathers to go a woing to the two rich Widows the Lady Iantil and the Lady Passionate 2 Gent. Riches are the Loadstone of affection or at least professions 1 Gent. The truth is Riches draw more Suters than Youth Beauty or Virtue Exeunt Scene 24. Enter two or three Gentlemen Monsieur Comerade Monsieur Compagnion and Monsieur la Gravity Monsieur Comerade For Heavens sake let us go and address our selves to the two Rich Widows Monsieur Compagnion For my part I will address my self to none but the young Widow the Lady Iantil and to her let us go without delay Monsieur la Gravity It will be uncivil to go so soon after their Husbands Death for their Husbands are not yet laid in their Graves Monsieur Compagnion If they were we should come too late for I knew a man which was a great friend of mine who was resolved to settle himself in a married course of life and so he went a wooing to a Widow for a Widow he was resolved to marry and he went a wooing to one whose Husband was but just cold in his grave but she told him she was promised before so he wooed another whilst she followed her Husbands Corps but she told him he came too late whereat he thought with the third not to be a second in his Sute and so expressed his desires in her Husbands sickness she told him she was very sorry that she had past her word before to another for if she had not she would have ma le him her choice whereat he curst his imprudence and wooed the fourth on her wedding day who gave him a promise after her Husband was dead to marry him and withall she told him that if she had been married before it had been ten to one but he had spoke too late for said she when we are Maids we are kept from the free conversation of men by our Parents or Guardians but on our wedding day we are made free and set at liberty and like as young Heirs on the day of one and twenty we make promises like bonds for two or three lives wherefore I fear we shall miss of our hopes for these two Widows will be promised before we address our Sute Monsieur la Gravity No no for I am confident all do not so for some love to have the freedoms of their wills for every promise is a bondage to those that make a Conscience to keep their promise besides it is not only variety that pleaseth women but
World for knowledge yet so as it looks as out of a window on a prospect it uses the World out of necessity but not serves the World out of slavery it is industrious for its own tranquility fame and everlasting life for which it leaves nothing unsought or undone is a wise soul Monsieur Profession Madam my soul is tyed to your soul with such an undissoulable knot of affection that nothing no not death can lose it nor break it asunder wherefore wheresoever your soul doth go thine will follow it and bear it company Madam Solid Then your soul vvill be incognita for my soul vvill not know whether your soul will be with it or not Ex. Monsieur Comorade Faith Thom. it s happy for thy soul to be drawn by her magnetick soul for that may draw lead or direct thy soul to Heaven otherwise thy soul will fall into Hell with the pressure of they sins for thy soul is as heavy as crime can make it Mons. Prof. Why then the divel would have found my soul an honest soul in being full weight his true coyn the right stamp of his Picture or Figure for vvhich he vvould have used my soul vvell and if Heaven gives me not this Lady Hell take me Monsieur Comorade Certainly you may be the Divels guest but whether you will be the Ladys Husband it is to be doubted Mons. Profession Well I will do my endeavour to get her and more a man cannot do Ex. Enter Madamosel Caprisia and Monsieur Importunate MOnsieur Importunate You are the rarest beauty and greatest wit in the World Mad. Capris. Wit is like beauty and beauty is oftener created in the fancie than the face so wit oftener by opinion than in the brain not but surely there may be a real beauty and so a real wit yet that real wit is no wit to the ignorant no more than beauty to the blind for the wit is lost to the understanding as beauty is lost to the eyes and it is not in nature to give what is not in nature to receive nor in nature to shew what is not in nature to be seen so there must be eyes to see beauty and eares to hear wit and understanding to judge of both and you have neither judgments eyes nor understandings ears nor rational sense Monsieur Importunate VVhy then you have neither beauty nor wit Mad. Capris. I have both but your commendations are from report for fools speaks by rote as Parrots do Ex. Monsieur Importunate solus Monsieur Importunate She is like a Bee loaded with sweet honey but her tongue is the sting that blisters all it strikes on Ex. Scene 8. Enter Madamosel Volante and Monsieur Bon Compaignon Bon Compaignon Lady why are you so silent Madam Volante VVhy soul I speak to those that understands me not Bon Compaignon VVhy are you so difficult to be understood Mad. Volante No but understanding is so difficult to find Bon Compaignon So and since there is such a total decay of understanding in every brain as there is none to be found but in your own you will make a new Common-wealth in yours where your thoughts as wife Magistrates and good Citizens shall govern and traffick therein and your words shall be as Letters of Mart and your senses shall be as legate Embassadors that lives in other Kingdoms which takes instructions and give intelligence or rather your thoughts are destinies and fates and your words their several decrees Mad. Volante Do you think my thoughts can warrant Laws or can my words decree them Bon Compaignon I believe your thoughts are so wise and just that whatsoever they allow of must be best and your words are so witty rational positive and powerfull as none can contradict them Mad. Volante Good Sir contradict your self or Truth will contradict you Bon Compaignon Nay faith I will never take the pains to contradict my self let Truth do what she will Ex. ACT II. Scene 9. Enter Madam la Mere and her daughter Madamosel Caprisia Madam Mere Daughter did you entertain the Lady Visit civilly Mad. Capris. Yes Mother extraordinary civilly for I gave her leave to entertain herself with her own discourse Mad. Mere That was rudely Mad. Capris. O no for certainly it is the height of courtship to our sex to let them talk all the talk themselves for all women takes more delight to discourse themselves than to hear another and they are extreamly pleased if any listens or at lest seems to listen to them For the truth is that talking is one of the most luxurious appetites women have wherefore I could not be more civiller than to bar and restrain the effeminate nature in my self to give her tongue liberty Madam Mere But you should have spoken a word now and then as giving her civilly some breathing rest for her discourse to lean upon Mad. Capris. Her speech was so strong and long-winded as it run with a full speed without stop or stay it neither need spurre nor whip the truth is it had been well if it had been held in with the bridle of moderation for it ran quite beyond the bounds of discretion although sometimes it ran upon the uneven wayes of slander other times upon the stony ground of censure and sometimes in the soul wayes of immodesty and often upon the furrows of non-sense besides it did usually skip over the hedges of Truth and certainly if the necessities of nature and the separations of Neigh-bourhood and the changes and inter-course of and in the affairs of the VVorld and men did not forcibly stop sometimes a womans tongue it would run as far as the confines of death Mad. Mere But let me tell you Daughter your tongue is as sharp as a Serpents sting and will wound as cruelly and deadly where it bites Capris. It proves my tongue a womans tongue Mad. Mere VVhy should a womans tongue have the effects of a Serpents sting Capris. The reason is evident for the great Serpent that tempted and so perverted our Grandmother Eve in Paradise had a monstrous sting and our Grandmother whetted her tongue with his sting and ever since all her effeminate rase hath tongues that stings Ex. Scene 10. Enter Madamosel Doltche and Monsieur Bon Compaignon BOn Compaignon Lady Monsieur Nobilissimo is so in love with you as he cannot be happy untill you be his wife Doltche I wonder he should be in love with me since I have neither beauty to allure him nor so much riches as to intice him nor wit to perswade him to marry me Bon Compaignon But Lady you have vertue good nature sweet disposition gracefull behaviour which are sufficient Subjects for love to settle on did you want what you mentioned out you have all not only what any man can with or desire with a wife but you have as much as you can wish and desire to have your self Doltche I will rather be so vain as to strive to believe you than
honest soul and heart that is ready to serve you in any honest way but since I am deceived and couzened into love by false reports finding the best of man-kind basely wicked and all the World so bad that praise nothing good and strives to poyson vertue I will inancor my self and live on Antidotes of prayers for fear of the infection Lord Singul. And I will not you pray for me Affectionata I cannot chose my Lord for gratitude inforces me First because I have loved you next because I have served you and give me leave to kiss your hand and then there drop some tears at my departure Weeping kneels down and kisses her hand Lord Singularity Rise you must not go away until you have cleared your self from being a spie Affectionata I fear no accusations Exeunt FINIS THE SECOND PART OF LOVES ADVENTURES THe Lord Singularity Sir Serious Dumb Sir Timothy Compliment Sir Humphry Bold Sir Roger Exception Sir Peaceable Studious Foster Trusty Collonels Captains Lieutenants and Corporals Petitioners Officers Messengers Iudges Iuries Servants The Lady Orphant Lady Bashfull Lady Ignorance Lady Wagtail Lady Amorous Nurse Fondly Mistriss Reformer Lady Bashfulls woman Chamber-maids EPILOGUE NOble Spectators you have spent this day Not only for to see but judge our Play Our Authoress sayes she thinks her Play is good If that her Play be rightly understood If not 't is none of her fault for she writ The Acts the Scenes the Language and the Wit Wherefore she sayes that she is not your Debtor But you are hers until you write a better Of even terms to be she understands Impossible except you clap your hands THE SECOND PART ACT I. Scene 1. Enter the Lady Bashfulls Chamber-maid and Mrs. Reformer her woman REformer This dumb Lower is the most diligent'st servant that ever was and methinks my Lady is somewhat more confident than she was for she will sit and read whilst he sits by Maid Doth she read to him Reformer No she reads to herself Maid There comes abundance of Gallants to visit my Lady every day and they have all one answer that is she is not willing to receive visits and they all go civilly away unless Sir Humphry Bold and he rails horribly Reformer I have received from several Gentlemen above 20. Letters a day and as fast as they come she makes me burn them Maid But she reads them first Reformer No I read them to her Maid And doth she answer all those Letters Reformer She never answered one in her life and I dare swear she never will The Lady Bashfull calls as within another Room Reformer Madam Exeunt Scene 2. Enter the Lord Singularity and Affectionata Lord Singularity Affectionata Hast thou forgiven me my fault of doubting of thy vertue so much as to put it to a Tryal Affectionata My Noble Lord have you forgiven my facility and wavering faith that could so easily and in so short a time believe you could be wicked although you did accuse your self Lord Singularity Nay Affectionata I did not accuse my self though I did try thee Affectionata Then I have committed a treble fault through my mistake which requires a treble forgiveness Lord Singularity Thou art so vertuous thou canst not commit a fault and therefore needs no forgiveness Exeunt Scene 3. Enter the Lady VVagtail and Sir Humphry Bold SIr Humpry Bold Madam You have been pleased to profess a friendship to me and I shall desire you will do a friendly part for me Lady Wagtail Any thing that lyes in my power good Sir Humphry Bold Sir Humphry Bold Then pray Madam speak to the Lady Bashfull in my behalf that I may be her Husband Lady Wagtail I will Sir Humphry but she is bashfull yet I was there Yesterday and she entertained me indifferently well but seemed to be wonderfull coy but howsoever I will do my poor indeavour Sir Humphry Sir Humphry Bold Pray do Madam Exeunt Scene 4. Enter Affectionata walking in a melancholly posture his Hat pulled over his brows and his arms inter-folded To him enters the Lord Singularity LOrd Singularity My Affectionata Why walks thou so melancholly He pulls of his Hat to his Lord and Bows Affectionata The cause is not that I lye under an aspersion by reason I lye not under a crime But truly my Lord I am troubled that I am threatened to be tormented for I would not willingly indure pain though I could willingly receive death but as for the aspersions I am no wayes concerned for I make no question but my honest life my just actions and the truth of my words will so clear me at the last as I shall appear as innocent to the World as Angels doth in Heaven Lord Singularity Comfort your self for I will rather suffer death than you shall suffer pain Affectionata Heaven defend you my Lord whatsoever I suffer Ex. Scene 5. Enter the Lady VVagtail and Mistriss Reformer LAdy Wagtail Pray Mistriss Reformer be Sir Humphry Bold's friend to thy Lady and I protest to thee he shall be thy friend as long as he and you live and I do not see any reason your Lady should refuse him for he is both as proper and stout a man as any is living this day in the Land Reformer Indeed Madam I dare not mention it to my Lady for she is so adverse against marriage as she takes those for her enemies as doth but mention it Lady Wagtail Then surely she is not a woman for there is none of the effeminate Sex but takes it for a disgrace to live an old maid and rather than dye one they will marry any man that will have them and the very fear of not marrying is so terrible to them as whilst they are so young as they are not fit to make wives they will miserably cast away themselves to the first that makes a proffer although they be poor base or mean rather than venture to try out their fortunes Reformer But my Lady is not of that humour Lady Wagtail Come come I know thou canst perswade thy Lady if thou wouldst and if you will Sir Humphry Bold will give thee 500 l. to buy thee a Husband for thou hast lived too long a maid I faith Reformer I am not a maid Madam I am a widow Lady Wagtail What a musty widow Reformer I know not whether I am musty but I am a widow Lady Wagtail Let mee tell thee that it is as great a disgrace to live a widow as an old maid wherefore take thee 500 l. to get thee a second Husband Reformer Truly I would not sell my Lady for all the World much less for 500 l. neither would I marry again if I were young and might have my choyce Lady Wagtail Lord bless me and send me out of this house least it should infect me for let me tell thee were my Husband dead to morrow I would marry the day after his Funeral if I could get any man to marry me and so I would serve 20. Husbands
will send you amongst the effeminate Sex where you may learn to sport with Ladies as well as fight with Turks Affectionata speaks softly to her self pray Jove they do not search me Exeunt Scene 26. Enter the Lady Wagtail and the Lady Amorous LAdy Wagtail I can tell you news Lady Amorous What news Lady Wagtail Sir Serious Dumb can speak again Lady Amorous I am sorrow for that for now he may tell tales out of School Lady Wagtail If he do we will whip him with the rods of tongues which is more sharp than the rods of wyer Lady Amorous We may whip him with words but we our selves shall feel the smart of reproch Lady Wagtail How simply you talk as if reproch could hurt a woman when reproch is born with us and dyes with us Lady Amorous If reproch have no power of our Sex why are all women so carefull to cover their faults and so fearfull to have their crimes divulged Lady Wagtail Out of two reasons first because those of the masculine Sex which have power as Fathers Uncles Brothers and Husbands would cut their throats if they received any disgrace by them for disgrace belongs more to men than women The other reason is that naturally women loves secrets yet there is nothing they can keep secret but their own particular faults neither do they think pleasure sweet but what is stollen Lady Amorous By your favour women cannot keep their own faults secret Lady Wagtail O yes those faults that may ruine them if divulged but they cannot keep a secret that is delivered to their trust for naturally women are unfit for trust or council Lady Amorous But we are fit for faction Lady Wagtail The World would be but a dull World if it were not for industrious factions Lady Amorous The truth is that if it were not for faction the World would lye in the cradle of Peace and be rock'd into a quiet sleep of security Lady Wagtail Prithee talk not of quiet and peace and rest for I hate them as bad as death Lady Amorous Indeed they resemble death for in death there is no wars nor noise Lady Wagtail Wherefore it is natural for life neither to have rest nor peace being cantrary to death Exeunt ACT IV. Enter the Lord Singularity and Affectionata AFfectionata My Lord I hear the King hath invited you to attend him in his progress this Summer Lord Singularity Yes but I have made my excuse and have got leave to stay at home for I will tell thee truly that I had rather march ten miles with an Artillery than travel one with a Court and I had rather fight a battel than be bound to ceremony or flattery which must be practised if one live at Court Besides I have been bred to lead an Armie and not to follow a Court And the custom of the one have made me unacquainted and so unfit for the other for though I may truly say I am a good Souldier yet I will confess ingenuously to thee I am a very ill Courtier Affectionata I think they are the most happiest that are least acquainted with a great Monarchs Court Lord Singularity I will tell thee a discourse upon this theam in the time of Henry the eighth of England there were many Courtiers of all degrees about him and the theam of their discourse was who was the happiest man in England So all the Nobles and inferiour Courtiers agreed unanimously it was his Majesty and it could be no man else and they all said that their judgements was so clear in that point that it could not admit of a contradiction or dispute Said Henry the eighth by the body of our Lord you are all mistaken then said one of the Courtiers I beseech your Majesty to tell us who is the happiest man By the Lord said the King that Gentleman that lives to his profit and dare moderately spend for his pleasure and that neither knows me nor I know him he is the happiest man in the Kingdom and I am of Henry the eights opinion but howsoever it were better to be such a one that goeth with the bagge and baggage of an Armie than one of the tail of a Court Affectionata But your Lordship would not refuse to be as the chief as to be a Favourite for a Favourite is more sought feared and flattered than the King himself Lord Singularity I think I should not refuse to be a Favourite by reason a Favourite is a General to command Martial and Conduct in all affairs both at home and abroad in peace and in war and all by the power and authority of the commission of Favourites Affectionata Which Commission hath a greater and larger extent than any other Commission Lord Singularity You say right for it extends as far as the Kings power Exeunt Scene 27. Enter the Lady Bashfull and Reformer her woman REformer Madam shall your wedding be private or publick Lady Bashfull Private Reformer I wonder you will have it private Lady Bashfull Why do you wonder Reformer Because the wedding-day is the only triumphant day of a young maids life Lady Bashfull Do you call that a triumphant day that inslaves a woman all her life after no I will make no triumph on that day Reformer Why you had better have one day than none Lady Bashfull If my whole life were triumphant it would be but as one day when it was past or rather as no day nor time for what is past is as if it never were and for one day I will never put my self to that ceremonious trouble which belongs to feasting revelling dressing and the like Reformer I perceive your Ladyship desires to be undrest upon the Wedding-day Lady Bashfull No that I do not but as I will not be carelesly undrest so I will not be drest for a Pageant show Exeunt Scene 28. Enter the Lord Singularity and AFfectionata AFfectionata I think there is no Family more methodically ordered prudently governed than your Lordships Lord Singularity It were a disgrace to my profession if I should not well know how to command for a good Commander in the field can tell how to be a good Manager in his private Family although a prudent Master of a Family knows not how to be a skilfull Commander in the field but a prudent Master must have a trusty Steward so a knowing General must have a carefull and skilfull Lieutenant-General or else he will be very much troubled also both Master and General must have other Officers or else they will not find their Accounts or Conquests as he hopes or expects For neither General nor Master can order every particular command nor rectifie every particular errour himself for a Generals Office is only to direct order and command the chief Officers and not the common Souldiers So the Master of a Family is only to direct order and command his Steward he the rest of the Officers and the common servants every one must order those that belongs
shades to find thee out O! O death quick dispatch Let me unprisoned be my body is old decayed and worn times ruins shews it Oh! Oh! let life fall for pitty pull it down stops a time Am I not dead you cruel powers above to lengthen out an old mans life in misery and pain why did not Time put out the sight of both my eyes and also deaf my ears that I might neither hear nor see the death of my lifes joy O Luxurious Death how greedily thou feedst on youth and beauty and leist old Age hang withering on lifes tree O shake me off let me no longer grow if not grief shall by force snip off my tender stalk and pitty lay me in the silent grave Heark Heark I hear her call me I come I come Childe He feches a great sigh O no she is gone she is gone I saw her dead her head hung down like as a Lilly whose stalk was broke by some rude blusterous wind He stares about There there I see her on her dutious knee Her humble eyes cast to the ground Her spotlesse hands held up for blessings crave asking forgivenesse for faults not done O no She is dead She is dead I saw her eye-lids cloze like watry Clouds which joyn to shut out the bright Sun and felt her hands which Death made cold and numb like as to Cristal balls She is gone she is gone and restless grows my mind thoughts strive with thoughts struggle in my brain passions with passions in my heart make War My Spirits run like furies all about Help help for Heavens sake and let life out Ex. Scene 15. Enter the Lady Mother Love alone LAdy Mother Love O my daughter my daughter is dead she is dead Oh that ever I was born to bear a Childe to dye before me Oh she was the Comfort of my Heart the pleasure of my Eyes the delight of my life Oh she was Good she was Sweet she was Fair O what shall I do what shall I do Ex. Scene 16. Enter Sir Thomas Father Love half distracted SIr Thomas Father Love Mercury lend me thy winged feet that I may fly to Heaven there to observe how all the Gods and Godesses doe gaze upon my Beautiful Childe for she is fairer than the light that great Apollo gives and her discourse more ravishing than the Musick of the Spheres but as soon as she sees me she will leave them all and run unto me as she used to do kneeling will kiss my hands which she must not do being a Goddess and I a Mortal wherefore I must kneel to her and carry her an offering but what shall the offering be Let me think Why I will kneel and offer up my Aged life unto her Memory but now I think of it better I cannot dye in Heaven wherefore let me Study let me Study what she did love best when she lived upon the Earth O I now remember when I did ask her what she lov'd best she would Answer her Father and her Fame but I believe if she were here it would be a hard Question for her to resolve which she preferr'd and being not to be separated in Affection we will not part in our Resurrection wherefore Mercury farewel for I will fly up with the Wings of her good Fame And carry up her Wit and there will strow It on Heavens floor as bright as Stars will show Her Innocency shall make new Milky waies Her Virtue shall Create new Worlds to praise Her never-dying Name Ha Ho! It shall be so it shall be so Ex. ACT IV. Scene 17. Enter the Lady Innocence alone studious with her eyes to the ground thou casting them up speaks LAdy Innocence I am not so much in love with the World as to desire to live nor have I offended Heaven so much as to be afraid to dye then way should I prolong my life when Honour bids me dye for what Noble Soul had not rather part with the Body than live in Infamy Then t is not Death that affrights me and yet I find my Soul is loath to leave its bodily Mansion but O to be buried in Oblivions grave is all I fear no Monumental Fame nor famous Monument my Soul displeases that makes it loath to leave the body in forgotten dust whilst it doth sadly wander in the Aire She walks a turn or two as in a musing thought then speaks Soul be at ease for the Memory of the dead is but like a dying Beauty vades by degrees or like a Flower whither'd hath neither Sent Colour nor Tast but moulders into dust so hath the mind no form of what is past But like as formless heaps those Objects lye And are intomb'd in the dark Memory O Foolish Vanity to be so much a slave to Fame since those that Fame doth love the best and favoureth most are not Eternal Wherefore Nature perswades me to release my woe Though foolish Superstition Natures foe Forbids it yet Reason aloud sayes dye Since Ease Peace Rest doth in the grave still lye Walkes about as in a silent musing then speaks I am resolv'd then Come sweet Death thou friend that never fails give me my liberty But stay my hasty resolution for I would not willingly go to the grave as beasts doe without Ceremony for I being friendless those humane Funeral rites will be neglected none will take the pains nor be at the charge to see them perform'd but some base vulgar person will throw me into the Earth without respect or regard wherefore I will Living perform the Ceremonies and as a guess or friend be at my own Funeral it shall be so and I will prepare it Ex. Scene 18. Enter Sir Thomas Father Love alone and for a time walkes as in a musing or thinking with his eyes cast on the ground then speaks FAther Love Multitudes of Melancholy thoughts croud in my brain And run to pull down Reason from his Throne Fury as Captain leads the way Patience and Hope is trod upon O these distracted thoughts burrie my Soul about Seeking a place to get a passage out But all the Ports are stopp'd O Cursed Death for to prolong a life that is so weary of its Mansion Enter Mr. Comfort Sir Thomas Father Loves friend Friend Sir will you give order for your Daughters Funeral and direct how you will have her interred Father Love How say you why I will have you rip my body open and make it as a Coffin to lay her in then heave us gently on sighs fetcht deep and lay us on a Herse of sorrowful groans then cover us with a Dark Black Pitchy Spungy Cloud made of thick Vapour drawn from bleeding hearts from whence may tears of showers run powring down making a Sea to drown remembrance in But O remembrance is a fury grown Torments my Soul now she is gone Friend Sir where there is no remedy you must have patience Father Love Patience out upon her she is an Idle lazy Gossip and keep
Funeral Oration Friend Why Sir your distemper hath so disordered all your Family as it was not thought of Father Love She shall not go to the Grave without due Praises if I have life to speak them Wherefore raise me up and carry me to the Holy place before her Herse thus in my Chair sick as I am For I will speak her Funeral Oration although with my last words Thus will I be carryed living to my Grave He is carried out in a Chair by Servants Ex. Scene 21. Enter the Lord de l' Amour alone as in a Melancholy humour LOrd de l'Amour When I do think of her my mind is like a tempestuous Sea which foams and roars and roles in Billows high My brain like to a Ship is wracked and in it's ravenous Waves my heart is drowned And as several winds do blow so several thoughts do move some like the North with cold and chilly Fears others as from the South of hot Revenge do blow As from the East despairing storms do rise A Western grief blows tears into mine eyes Walks about and weeps Enter Master Charity his Friend Mr. Charity My Lord why are you so melancholy for that which is past and cannot be help'd Lord de l'Amour Oh! the remembrance of her death her cruel death is like the Infernal Furies torments my soul gives it no case nor rest For sometimes my soul is flung into a Fire of Rage That burns with furious pain And then with frozen despair it rips it up again But I unjust and credulous I was the cause of her untimely death Enter the Maid that accused her Falshood O my Lord forgive me for I have murdered the innocent Lady you grieve for for my false Accusation was the hand that guided the dagger to her heart but my Ladies command was the Thief that stole the Chain for she commanded me to take the Chain and accuse the Lady of the Theft for which she gave me the Chain for a reward This I will witnesse by oath unto you and all the World For it is heavier than a world upon my Conscience Lord de l'Amour Why did your Lady so wicked an act Falshood Through Jealousie which bred Envy Envy Malice Malice Slander and this Slander hath produce Murder Enter Informer the other Maid Informer Oh my Lady My Lady hath hanged her self for when she heard Falshood was gone to tell your Lordship the truth of the Chain she went into a base place and hung her self and upon her breast I found this written Paper She gives it de l'Amour to read Lord de l'Amour It is the Lady Incontinents Hand-writing He reads it I have been false to my Marriage-bed lived impudently in the sin of Adultery in the publick face of the World I have betray'd the trust imposed to my charge slandered the Innocent poysoned the Instrument I imployed Falshood All which being summ'd up was worthy of hanging Falshood falls down dead Lord de l'Amour She hath sav'd me a labour and kept my Heroick Honour free from the stains of having laid violent hands on the Effeminate Sex Friend What shall be done with this dead Body Lord de l'Amour Let her Ladies body with hers be thrown into the Fields to be devoured of Beasts Ex. ACT V. Scene 22. Enter the Funeral Herse of the Lady Sanspareile covered with white Satine a silver Crown is placed in the midst her Herse is born by six Virgins all in white other Virgins goe before the Herse and strew Flowers white Lillies and white Roses The whilst this Song is sung SPOtlesse Virgins as you go Wash each step as white as Snow With pure Chrystal streams that rise From the Fountain of your eyes Fresher Lillies like the day Strew and Roses as white as they As an Emblem to disclose This Flower sweet short liv'd as those The whilst her Father is carryed as sick in a Chair the Chair covered with black and born black by Mourners he himself also in close Mourning when they have gone about the Stage The Herse is set neer to the Grave there being one made Then the Father is placed in his Chair upon a raised place for that purpose the raised place also covered with Black he being placed speaks her Funeral Sermon Father Love Most Charitable and Noble Friends that accompany the Dead Corps to the Grave I must tell you I am come here although I am as a Dead Man to the World yet my desire is to make a living Speech before I go out of the world not only to divulge the Affections I had for my Daughter but to divulge her Virtue Worth and good Graces And as it is the custome for the nearest Kindred or best and constantest Friends or longest acquaintance to speak their Funeral Oration wherein I take my self to be all wherefore most fit to speak her Funeral Oration For I being her Father am her longest acquaintance and constantest Friend and nearest in Relation wherefore the fitest to declare unto the world my natural and Fatherly Love Death will be a sufficient witnesse For though I am old yet I was healthful when she lived but now I cannot live many hours neither would I for Heaven knows my affections struggle with Death to hold Life so long as to pay the last Rites due to her dead Corps struck by Death's cruel Dart But most Noble and Charitable Friends I come not here with eye fil'd with salt tears for sorows thirsty Jaws hath drunk them up sucked out my blood left my Veins quite dry luxuriously hath eat my Marow out my sighs are spent in blowing out Life's Fire only some little heat there doth remain which my affections strive to keep alive to pay the last Rites due to my dead Child which is to set her praises forth for living Virtuously But had I Nestors years 't would prove too few to tell the living Stories of her Youth for Nature in her had packed up many Piles of Experience of Aged times besides Nature had made her Youth sweet fresh and temperate as the Spring and in her brain Flowers of Fancies grew Wits Garden set by Natures hand wherein the Muses took delight and entertained themselves therein Singing like Nightingales late at Night or like the Larks ere the day begin Her thoughts were as the Coelestial Orbes still moving circular without back ends surrounding the Center of her Noble mind which as the Sun gave light to all about it her Virtues twinkled like the fixed Starrs whose motion stirs them not from their fix'd place and all her Passions were as other starres which seemed as only made to beautifie her Form But Death hath turned a Chaos of her Form which life with Art and Care had made and Gods had given to me O cursed death to rob and make me poor Her life to me was like a delightful Mask presenting several interchanging Scenes describing Nature in her several Dresses and every Dresse put in a
those back-holders that are the greatest Libertines make the best Husbands Lady Ward 'T is true he is of a noble nature valiant and generous prudent and just and temperate in all delights and free from all other vices but Incontinency civil and obliging to all the world but to me and I could love him better than life could he be constant and only love me as he ought to do a Wife otherwise Death were more pleasing to me Exeunt Scene 10. Enter the Lady Contemplation musing and the Lady Visitant comes to her LAdy Contempl. You were born to do me a mischief Lady Visit. Why how Lady Contempl. Why you have routed an Army Lady Visit. Which way Lady Contempl. I did imagine my self Married my Husband being a General of an Army who had fought many Battels and had won many Victories conquer'd many Nations at last an unfortunate day of Battel being fought my Husband being too active and venturous making lanes of slain bodies as he went and his horse riding thorow Rivers of blood those Rivers rising so high as his horse was forced to swim but the blood growing thick to a jelly obstructed his way which made his horse furious which fury added to his strength forced a passage over a hill or heap of slain bodies but the horses spirits being spent with fury and labour fell strengthless to the ground with my Husband upon his back and being in the midst of his Enemies Army his Enemies seeing him fall ran about him in great numbers and so took him prisoner whereupon his Souldiers soon missing him thought he was kill'd upon which belief their courages grew cold their limbs unactive and their spirits so benumm'd as they all seemed like to a number of stone-statues which unactive dulness gave their Enemies the Day without any after-blows I being in the Camp hearing of my Husbands misfortunes ran with a distracted fear towards the Enemies Camp I being espy'd by some of my Husbands scatter'd Troops was stop'd in the way and so brought back to my Tent again where when I was there some of my Husbands Officers of the Army told me That though the Day was lost yet there was a considerable Body left which I no sooner heard but my spirits took new life and then excusing my fear told those Commanders it was not through fear that made me run out of my Tent for I did not fly from my Enemies but to them and that I sought death and not life and to express my courage I told them That if they would give me leave I would take my Husbands Office and lead the Army They told me that if the rest of the Commanders would agree to it they were well contented So when all the Commanders met together I spake thus unto them Noble Friends and valiant Souldiers you may think it a vain ambition for me to desire to lead your Army especially against so potent an Enemy and being a woman which female Sex are usually unexperienced in Martial Affairs as also by nature fearful which fears may ruine an Army by giving wrong direction causing a confusion through distraction and truly an Army were not to be trusted unto a woman management and ordering if that Records had not given us Precedents which is that Woman have led Armies have fought valiantly themselves and have had good success and not so much by fortunes favour as by their own wise Conduct And to shew that Pallas is a friend unto her own Sex is that in all History there are very few women than can be found that have lost Battels in the field of Wars but many that have won Battels and in all publick Affairs it is to be observed the Gods do generally assist our Sex whereby to shew their own power and to abate the haughty pride of men But to induce you more for men trust not so much unto the Gods as to their own strength is that you are present in all Councels and Actions to assist and direct me besides I am Wife unto your General who was and is an expert Souldier and a valiant man although he now had ill fortune but ill fortune neither lessens valour nor experience but rather increases them This gallant and wise man my Husband and your General his Discourses have been my Tutors and his Example hath and shall be my Guide and if you dare trust me I dare venture otherwise I shall stay in my Tent and pray for your good success After I had left off speaking an old Commander which had served long in the Wars and was much esteemed answered me as thus Noble Lady although your youth doth disswade us yet your beauty and wit doth encourage us for what man although he were possest with fear itself can run away when a fair Lady sights for beauty triumphs in all hearts and commands the whole world wherefore that man that shall or will deny to follow your Command is of a bastard-kind although a lawful Issue With that all the rest of the Commanders cry'd or call'd out that none was so fit to Lead and Command them as I Thus being chosen I call'd a general Muster of my Souldiers and then gave order that some of the broken Regiments should be mended and made up with other broken Regiments also I made new Officers in the room of those that were slain or taken prisoners and after I surveyed my Artillery and Ammunition which done I drew my Army into a Body and after I had given Orders and Directions for the Souldiers to march towards the Enemies Camp which when the Enemy heard of a new Army coming towards them they drew out the Body of their Army in Battel Array But I shunn'd to fight so soon as appeared by reason my Army was tyred with marching wherefore I gave order to Intrench Besides I thought it might give my souldiers more courage when accustomed to the fight and neighbourhood of the Enemies But withall I made some of them give intelligence to the Enemy that a woman led the Army by which they might despise us and so become more negligent by which negligence we might have an advantage In the mean time I sent to Treat of a Peace and to have my Husband set at liberty but the Enemy was so averse to a peace as they returned me both jesting and scornful Answers So when I saw no peace could be made I drew out my Army into Battel Array which when the Enemy perceiv'd they did the like but it will be too tedious at this time to tell the Form and Figures I put my Army into as also what Commanders led or who commanded the Horse or who commanded the Foot that day only let me tell you I led the Van my self and was Accoutred after this manner I had a Masculine Suit and over that a cloth of silver Coat made close to my waste which reached to the ankles of my legs and those Arms I wore being all gilt were Back Brest Gorget
the wisest man as Solomon the wittiest man as David the strongest man as Sampson the fairest man as Paris of Troy the valiantest man as Achilles the subtilest man as Ulysses the power-fullest men as Alexander and Caesar Faction By your favour Women never made a Conquest of the two latter and therefore cannot be said to be absolute Conquerors for none are absolute Conquerors but those that conquer power that is those that get absolute dominion over all the World which Alexander and Caesar are said to have done by their Valour and Conduct and never any Woman or Women conquer'd those men as to get them to yield up their power for a womans sake which shews they were not rul'd by women although they lov'd women by which it is to be proved that women never made an absolute Conquest of men because they could never conquer absolutely those two absolute Conquerors and Masters of the World Pleasure But Livia Conquer'd Augustus Caesar and Ruled his Power and he was as absolute a Master of the Worlds Power as Iulius Caesar and Alexander Faction He was rather to be said the Possessor of the Worlds power than the absolute Conqueror of the Worlds power Superbe It is as good to be a Conqueress of the possessor of power as to conquer the Conqueror of power Ambition It is as good for the Benefit but not so much for the Honour of it Portrait But Alexander nor Caesar lived not so long a time as to be Conquer'd by women for women must have time and opportunity for to gain the Conquest in as well as men have Faction If Alexander and Caesar must have been old before they possibly could have been conquer'd it proves that women do rather conquer Age than power weakens the strength and the truth is women conquer nothing but the vices weaknesses and defects of men As they can conquer an unexperienc'd Youth and doting Age ignorant Breeding effeminate Natures wavering Minds facile Dispositions soft Passions wanton Thoughts unruly Appetites and the luxurious Lives of men but they cannot conquer mens fix'd Resolutions their heroick Valours their high Ambitions their magnificent Generosities their glorious Honours or their conquering or over-ruling Powers Nor can women conquer their moral Vertues as their Prudence Fortitude Justice and Temperance But put the case a man had the power of the whole World and could quit that power for the enjoyment of any particular woman or women yet he quits not that power for the womans sake but for his minds-sake his pleasure-sake as to satisfie his Fancy Passion or Appetites And what Conquest soever Women make on Men if any Conquest they do make is more by the favour of Nature than the Gods Ambition Well I wish I may be the Conqueress of one man let the favour proceed from which it will Exeunt Scene 4. Enter Ease Wanton and Idle EAse There hath been such a Skirmish or rather a Battel Idle How and betwixt whom Ease Why betwixt Grave Temperance and Mother Matron Idle What was the cause of their falling out Ease Why Mother Matron had a spic'd pot of Ale in her hand so she set it to her mouth and drank a hearty draught of it and finding it very good and refreshing drank another draught By my faith said she this is a cheerly cup indeed and a comfortable drink and with that drank another draught and so long-winded she was as she drank up all the Ale therein Whereupon Grave Temperance rebuked her for drinking so much saying that though a little as one draught or so might refresh the Spirits yet a great quantity would make her drunk Whereupon Mother Matron who could not then suffer a reproof in anger she flung the pot which was still in her hand at Grave Temperance's head Idle It was a sign she had drank all the good liquor out or otherwise she would not have throvvn the pot avvay Ease It was a sign she was drunk or else she would not have done so outragious an act as to have broke Grave Temperances head Enter Mother Matron as half drunk and scolding Matron Reprove me teach me Have not I liv'd long enough in the World to be able to govern my self but Temperance must govern me Am I a Child am I a Novice that I must be governed by Temperance No no let her go to Nunneries and let her be the Lady Prioress to govern Nuns for yfaith she shall not Prior me Idle Not Frier you do you say Matron No nor Nunn me neither for I will be neither Fryerd nor Nunn'd Ease Why what will you be Matron Why what should I be but as I am a wise sober and discreet Governess to a company of young Ladies Ladies that love the World better than Heaven and hate a Nunnery worse than Death and by my Faith they have reason for liberty is the joy of life and the World is the place of sensual pleasures and sensual pleasures are substantial and in being when the pleasures after death are uncertain but if they were certain yet I had rather have a draught of Ale in this World than a draught of Nectar in the next Idle This Ale hath heat her into a Poetical height Matron What do you say into a pots head Idle No I say your head is a pot filled with the fume of Ale Matron What have you to do with my head Ease What had you to do with Grave Temperances head Matron I would Temperances grave head were in your throat and then there would be two fools heads one within another Idle Come let 's leave her or she will talk her self into a fit of madnesse Ease and Idle go out Matron alone Matron A couple of Gill-flirts to heat me thus Exit Scene 5. Enter Monsieur Satyrical and Madamoiselle Bon' Esprit SAtyrical Dear Mistris have you freely pardon'd and forgiven me my faults Bon' Esprit Yes Satyrical But will you not reprove me for them hereafter Bon' Esprit In a pardon all faults ought to be forgiven if not forgotten and no repetitions ought to be made of the same for a clear pardon and a free forgiveness blots out all offences or should do so But you imagine your offences greater than they are and by your doubts I to be of less good nature than I am Satyrical There are none that have offended what they love but fears and hopes and doubts sight Duels in their Minds Bon' Esprit Banish those doubts and let the hopes remain to build a confident belief to keep out jealousie otherwise it will take possession and destroy at least disturb affection Satyrical Not my affection to you Exeunt Scene 6. Enter Superbe Ambition and Portrait FAction For Heavens sake let 's go see Mother Matron for 't is said she 's mad-drunk Ambition If she be mad-drunk she 's rather to be shunn'd than sought after Superbe Why do not we give money to see mad people in Bedlam and we may see her for nothing Ambition Those people
a while longer for the Curtezans sake for we shall never get such store nor such choise of Mistrisses therefore though the sober and chaste women are kept up here in Italy yet the wild and wanton are let loose to take their liberty But in Turky that barbarous Country all are kept close those that will as well as those that will not but if they had the custome of Italy to keep up only their honest women it were a Charity for otherwise a man loses his time in Courting those women that will not accept of his love for how should a man know whether women will or will not having all sober faces and demure countenances coy carriages and denying words Frere But yet they consent at last for Importunity and Opportunity 't is said wins the chastest she Friend Faith all the flowry Rhetorick and the most observing times and fittest opportunities and counterfeiting dyings win nothing upon a cold Icy Constitution or an obstinate Morality 't is true it may work some good effect upon an Icy Conscience Enter a man to Monsieur Frere with a Letter Frere From whence comes that Letter Man From France Sir I believe from your Father Exit man He opens it and reads it to himself Friend What News Hath thy Father sent thee money Frere Yes but it is to return home for he hath sent me word my Sister is marry'd to a very rich honest and sweet-natur'd man and that also he would have me come home to marry a rich Heir one that is his Neighbors Daughter for my Father says he desires to see me setled in the World before he dies having but us two my Sister and I Friend Why is he sick that he talks of dying Frere No but he is old and that is more certain of Deaths approach Friend But is your sister marry'd say you Frere Yes Friend Faith I am sorry for 't for I thought to have marry'd her myself Frere Marry she would have had but a wilde Husband if she had marry'd you Friend The thoughts of this Rich Heir make thee speak most precisely as if thou wert the most temperate man in the world when there is none so deboist as thou art Frere Prethee hold thy tongue for I am very discreet Friend Yes to hide thy faults to dissemble thy passions and to compass thy desires but not to abate any of them Well if thy sister had not been marry'd I would have prais'd thee but now I will rail against thee for losers may have leave to talk Frere Why what hopes could you have had to marry her Friend VVhy I was thy Friend and that was hope enough But is thy sister so handsome as Fame reports her Frere I cannot tell for I never saw her since I was a little boy and she a very child I being kept strictly at School and from thence to the University And when I was to travel I went home but then she was at an Ants house a hundred miles from my Fathers house so as I saw her not but I must leave off this discourse unless you 'l return into France with me Friend No faith thou shalt return without me for I will not goe so soon unless my Friends had provided me a rich Heiress to welcom me home but since they have not I mean to stay and entertain my self and time with the plump Venetians Frere Fare thee well Friend and take heed you entertain not a disease Friend Thou speakest as if thou wert a Convertito Exeunt Scene 2. Enter Madam Bonit alone and sits down to work as sowing as she is working Monsieur Malateste her Husband enters Monsieur Malateste You are always at work for what use is it You spend more money in silk cruel thread and the like than all your work is worth Madam Bonit I am now making you bands Malateste Pray let my bands alone for I 'm sure they will be so ill-favour'd as I cannot wear them Bonit Do not condemn them before you have try'd them Malateste You may make them but I wi'l never wear them Bonit Well I will not make them since you dislike it Exeunt Scene 3. Enter two Gentlemen 1 GEnt. Come will you go to the Gaming-house 2 Gent. What to do 1 Gent. To play at Cards or the like Games 2 Gent. I will never play at such Games but with women 1 Gent. Why so 2 Gent. Because they are Effeminate Pastimes and not manly Actions neither will I meerly rely upon Fortunes favour without merit as Gamesters do 1 Gent. Why then will you go to a Tavern 2 Gent. For what 1 Gent. To drink 2 Gent. I am not thirsty 1 Gent. But I would have you drink until you are thirsty 2 Gent. That 's to drink drunk 1 Gent. And that 's that I desire to be 2 Gent. What 1 Gent. Why drunk 2 Gent. So do not I for I will not wilfully make my self uncapable as I can neither be able to serve my King Country nor Friend nor defend my Honour for when I am drunk I can do neither for a man drunk I weaker than a child that hath not strength to go or stand and is worse than those that are dumb for the dumb keep silence when those that are drunk doe stutter and stammer out non-sense and make themselves fools besides every Coward will take courage to beat at least affront a man that is drunk when as he dares not look ascue or come near him without respect when he is sober 1 Gent. Come come thou shalt go if it be but to decide our drunken quarrels and allay the wrathful vapour of Bacchus 2 Gent. No I will never decide the disputes of Fool Mad-men Drunkards nor Women for Fools understand no Reason Mad-men have lost their Reason Drunkards will hear no Reason and Women are not capable of Reason 1 Gent. Why are women not capable of Reason 2 Gent. Because it is thought or rather believ'd that women have no rational souls being created out of man and not from Iove as man was 1 Gent. If Iove hath not given them rational fouls I am sure Nature hath given them beautiful bodies with which Iove is enamour'd or else the Poets lye 2 Gent. Poets describe Iove according to their own passions and after their own appetites 1 Gent. Poets are Ioves Priests 2 Gent. And Natures Panders 1 Gent. Well if you will neither go to the Gaming-house Tavern nor Bawdy-house will you go and visit the sociable Virgins 2 Gent. Yes I like sociable Virginity very well But pray what are those sociable Virgins which you would have me go to see 1 Gent. VVhy a company of young Ladies that meet every day to discourse and talk to examine censure and judge of every body and of every thing 2 Gent. 'T is pity if they have not learn'd the rules of Logick if they talk so much that they may talk sense 1 Gent. I will assure you they have voluble Tongues and quick VVits 2 Gent. Let
light from the Sun or the World from its Center or the fix'd Stars from their assigned places than draw away love from him Sensible Why how if he will not have you Amor I can only say I shall be unhappy Sensible I hope you will be wiser than to make your self miserable for one you cannot have to be your Husband Exeunt Scene 27. Enter many of Monsieur Malateste's Servants writing against their Master and Ladies comming home Enter Monsieur Malateste and his Lady SErvants Heaven give your Worship joy and our noble Lady Madam Mal. What is this your best House Monsieur Mal. Yes and is it not a good one Sweet Madam Mal. Fie upon it I hate such an old-fashiond House wherefore pray pull it down and build another more fashionable as that there may be a Bell-view and Pergalus round the outside of the Horse also Arched Gates Pillars and Pilasters and carved Frontispeeces with Antick Imagery also I would have all the lower rooms vaulted and the upper rooms flat-roof'd painted and gilded and the Planchers checker'd and inlaid with silver the Stair-case to be large and winding the steps broad and low as shallow then to take in two or three Fields about your House to make large Gardens wherein you may plant Groves of Mirtle as also to make Walks of green Turf and those to be hanging and shelving as if they hung by Geometry also Fountains and Water-works and those Water-works to imitate those Birds in Winter that only sing in Summer Monsieur Mal. But this will cost a great summ of money Wise Madam Mal. That 's true Husband but to what use is money unless to spend Monsieur Mal. But it ought to be spent prudently Madam Mal. Prudently say you why Prudence and Temperance are the Executioners of Pleasure and Murtherers of Delight wherefore I hate them as also this covetous humour of yours Exeunt Monsieur Malateste and his Wife 1 Servant I marry Sir here is a Lady indeed for she talks of pulling down this House before she hath throughly seen it and of building up another 2 Servant If you will have my opinion the old servants must go down as well as the old house 3 Servant I believe so for she look'd very scornfully upon us nor spoke not one word either good or bad to us 4 Servant Well come let us go about our imployments and please as long as we can and when we can please no longer we must seek other Services Exeunt Scene 28. Enter Monsieur Frere and Madam Soeur MAdam Soeur Do not pursue such horrid Acts as to Whore your Sister Cuckold your Brother-in-Law dishonour your Father and brand your life and memory with black infamy Good Brother consider what a world of misery you strive to bring upon your self and me Frere Dear Sister pity me and let a Brothers pleading move your heart and bury not my youth in Death before the natural time Soeur 'T is better you should die and in the grave be laid than live to damn your soul Frere To kill my self will be as bad a crime Soeur O no for Death any way is more honourable than such a life as you would live Exeunt Scene 29. Enter the two Gentlemen 1 Gent. FRiend prethee tell me why you do not marry 2 Gent. Because I can find no woman so exact as I would have a Wife to be for first I would not have a very tall woman for the appears as if her soul and body were mis-match'd as to have a pigmy soul and a gyantly body 1 Gent. Perchance her soul is answerable to her body 2 Gent. O no for it is a question whether women have souls or no but for certain if they have they are of a dwarfish kind Neither would I have a wife with a masculine strength for it seems praeposterous to the softness and tenderness of their Sex neither would I have lean wife for she will appear always to me like the picture of Death had she but a sythe and hour-glass in her hand for though we are taught to have always Death in our Mind to remember our End yet I would not have Death always before my Eyes to be afraid of my End But to have a very lean wife were to have Death in my Arms as much as in my Eyes and my Bed would be as my Grave 1 Gent. Your Bed would be a warm Grave 2 Gent. Why man though Death is cold the Grave is hot for the Earth hath heat though Death hath none 1 Gent. What say you to a fat woman 2 Gent. I say a fat woman is a bed-fellow only for the Winter and not for the Summer and I would have such a woman for my Wife as might be a nightly companion all the year 1 Gent. I hope you would not make your Wife such a constant bed-fellow as to lie always together in one bed 2 Gent. Why not 1 Gent. Because a mans stomack or belly may ake which will make wind work and the rumbling wind may decrease love and so your wife may dislike you and dislike in time may make a Cuckold 2 Gent. By your favour it increases Matrimonial Love 't is true it may decrease Amorous Love and the more Amorous Love increases the more danger a man is in for Amorous Love even to Husbands is dangerous for that kind of Love takes delight to progress about when Matrimonial Love is constant and considers Nature as it is Besides a good Wife will not dislike that in her Husband which she is subject to her self but howsoever I will never marry unless I can get such a Wife as is attended by Virtue directed by Truth instructed by Age on honest grounds and honourable principles which Wife will neither dislike me nor I her but the more we are together the better we shall love and live as a maried pair ought to live and not as dissembling Lovers as most maried couples do 1 Gentlem. What think you of choosing a Wife amongst the Sociable Virgins 2 Gent. No no I will choose none of them for they are too full of discourse for I would have a Wife rather to have a listning Ear than a talking Tongue for by the Ear she may receive wise instructions and so learn to practise that which is noble and good also to know my desires as to obey my will when by speaking muck she may express her self a fool for great Talkers are not the wisest Practisers Besides her restless Tongue will disturb my Contemplations the Tranquillity of my Mind and the peace quiet and rest of my Life Exeunt Scene 30. Enter Madam Malateste and another Maid and Nan the former Ladies Maid MAdam Mal. Are you she that takes upon you to govern and to be Mistris in this House Nan Why I do but that I did in the other Ladies time Madam Mal. Let me tell you you shall not do so in my time nay you shall have no doings wherefore get you out of the
home but I will go to bed for I am not very well 1 Servant You do not look well Sir Malateste Indeed I am sick Exeunt Scene 42. Enter Madam Soeur and Monsieur Frere MAdam Soeur Lord Brother what is the reason you are come back so soon Hath not your Barb run the Race Frere No Soeur What makes you here then Frere To see you Soeur To see me why I shall give you no thanks because you left my Husband behind you Frere I do not come for your thanks I come to please my self Soeur Prethee Brother get thee gone for thy face doth not appear so honest as it uses to do Frere I do not know how my Face doth appear but my Heart is as it was your faithful Lover Soeur Heaven forbid you should relapse into your old disease Frere Let me tell you Sister I am as I was and was as I am that is from the first time I saw you since I came from Travel I have been in love with you and must enjoy you and if you will imbrace my love with a free consent so if not I 'll force you to it Soeur Heaven will never suffer it but cleave the Earth and swallow you alive Frere I care not so you be in my Arms but I will first try Heavens power and struggle with the Deities He takes her in his arms and carries her out she cries help help murther murther Exeunt Scene 43. Enter Monsieur Malateste as being not well and his Wife Madam Malateste MOnsieur Mal. Wife Is this the way to cure melancholy to sit up all night at Cards and to lose five hundred pounds at a sitting or to stay all night abroad a Dancing and Revelling Madam O yes for the Doctors say there is nothing better than good company to imploy the Thoughts with outward Objects otherwise the Thoughts feed too much upon the Body besides they say that Exercise is excellent good to open Obstructions and to disperse melancholy Vapour and the Doctors say there is no Exercise better than Dancing because there are a great Company meet together which adds Pleasure to the Labour Monsieur My other Wife did not do thus Madam Wherefore she died in her youth with melancholy but I mean to live while I am old if mirth and good company will keep me alive and know I am not so kind-hearted to kill my self to spare your Purse or to please your Humour The Lady goes out and he goes out after sighing Scene 44. Enter Madam Soeur alone as ravished Soeur Who will call unto the Gods for aid since they assist not Innocency nor give protection to a Virtuous Life Is Piety of no use or is Heaven so obdurate no holy prayers can enter Heaven-gates or penitential tears can move the Gods to pity But O my sorrows are too big for words and all actions too little for his punishment Enter Monsieur Frere all unbutton'd and his sword drawn in his hand Frere Sister I must die wherefore you must not live for I cannot be without your company although in death and in the silent grave where no Love 's made nor Passion known Soeur It 's welcom News for if death comes not by your hand my hand shall give a passage unto life Frere There is none so sit to act that part as I who am so full of sin want nothing now but murther to make up measure He wounds her to death Soeur Death thou are my griefs Reprieve and wilt unlade my Soul from heavy thoughts that miserable life throws on and sinks me to the Earth Brother farewel may all your crimes be buried in my grave and may my shame and yours be never known Oh Oh dies Frere Now she is dead my Mind is at rest since I know none can enjoy her after me but I will follow thee I come my Mistris Wife and Sister all in one Monsieur Frere falls upon the point of his sword then falls clos'd by Madam Soeur and lays his Arm over her then speaks You Gods of Love if any Gods there be O hear my prayer And as we came both from one Womb so joyn our Souls in the Elizium out Bodies in one Tomb Oh oh oh dies Scene 45. Enter Monsieur Malateste upon a Couch as sick of a Consumption his Friend Monsieur Fefy sitting by him Then enters Madam Malateste to her sick Husband MOnsieur Mal. Wife you are very unkind that you will not come to see me now I am sick nor so much as send to know how I do Madam I am loth to trouble you with unnecessary visits or impertinent questions Monsieur Is it unnecessary or impertinent to see a Husband when he is sick or to ask how he doth Madam Yes when their visits and questions can do them no good But God be with you for I must be gone Monsieur What already Madam Yes for I doubt I have staid too long for I have appointed a meeting and it will be a dishonour for me to break my word Fefy But it will be more dishonour to be dancing when your Husband is dying Lady Madam What will you teach me go tutor Girls and Boys and not me Monsieur Let her go friend for her anger will disturb me Exit Lady Fefy I know not what her anger doth you but her neglect of you doth disturb me And for my part I wonder how you can suffer her Malateste Alas how shall I help or remedy it But Heaven is just and punishes me for the neglect I used towards my first Wife who was virtuous and kind Fefy She was a sweet Lady indeed Malateste O she was But I Devil as I was to use her as I did making her a slave unto my whore and frowns conjecturing all her Virtues to a contrary sense for I mistook her patience for simplicity her kindness for wantonness her thrist for covetousness her obedience for flattery her retir'd life for dull stupidity and what with the grief to think how ill I used her and grieving to see how ill this Wife uses me wasting my Honour and Estate she hath brought me into a Consumption as you see But when I am dead as I cannot live long I desire you who are my Executor to let me buried in the same Tomb wherein my Wife is laid for it is a joy to me to think my dust shall be mixt with her pure ashes for I had rather be in the grave with my first Wife than live in a Throne with my second But I grow very sick even to death wherefore let me be removed Exeunt Scene 46. Enter Monsieur Pere and his Son-in-law Monsieur Marry MOnsieur Pere Son-in-law did your Brother say he was very ill Marry He said he had such a pain on his left side as he could not sit on his horse but must be forced to return home again Pere Heaven bless him for my heart is so full of fears and doubts as if it did Prognosticate some great
and quite from my Patience which makes me miserable and Misery is worse than Death for Death is a cessation of pain and Misery a torment of life But if this Report be true I will lay more curses on his head than a long penitential life shall be able to take off Exit Enter the two Maids of Sir John Dotard 1 MAid Lord Briget is so proud since she is preferr'd to be my Masters Laundry-maid as she will touch none but my Masters linnen 2 Maid She is become very fine upon her preferment I am sure it is not five or ten pound wages that will or can maintain her at that rate she goes for she hath had to my knowledge two new pair of shooes within three weeks of each other whereupon I told her that the shooes that she cast by would be very strong and serviceable if they were cobled and her Answer was what did I think she would wear cobled shooes I told her why not now as well as she did for she us'd to send her shooes to be cobled three or four times over and her wastcoat to be patch'd and her petticoats to be new-border'd and her stockings to be heel'd as the rest of us did and I knew of no Lands that had befallen her and therefore she may doe the same still 1 Maid And what said she then 2 Maid She bid me meddle with my own matters and not meddle with her and I dare not offend her for fear I should be turn'd away nay she is so proud as she turns her head aside when Richard the Carter comes to kiss her and she strives to shun his company when once within a short time she would make haste to wash her dishes that she might have time to sit in Richards Lap and there they would sit colling and kissing until the sea-coal-site was burn'd out 2 Maid But now she sits in a better seat Exeunt Scene 8. Enter Mistris Forsaken in mans Apparel naming her self Monsieur Disguise MOnsieur Disguise I cannot believe he will prove so false and perjurious but this Disguise I hope will bring me to discover the Truth And if he be false for his sake may all the Masculine Sex be slaves to the Effeminate Sex not bound by Love but by base servile fear may they long after the power but never get it may women govern the World and when they command the men dare not disobey and be despis'd for their reward may their Jealousies disturb their Rest their Cares increase their Labours may they work like Horses fawn like Dogs and bear like Asses But if he be constant may all the Masculine Sex be bless'd for his sake may all women desire admire and love him may Pleasure imbrace him Health preserve him and Time attend him may he be arm'd with Power crown'd with Peace and all Obedience bow to his command may the sound but of his Name bring joy to all hearts may all be pleas'd for his Birth pray for his Life and fear his Death may good Fortune trace his ways whilst he tides upon the wings of a glorious Fame Exeunt Scene 9. Enter Sir Francis Inconstant as in another Country with his new Mistris INconstant Sweet Mistris you are the Elixar of Beauty all other women are as unrefin'd metal like base coyn New Mistris Whilst I am unmarry'd you 'l flatter me but when I am your Wife you will change your complemental discourse to quarrelling disputes or insulting commands Inconstant O never never your Eye shall direct all my Actions your Commands shall rule my Life and your Pleasures shall be my onely Delight Exeunt Scene 10. Enter Sir James Hearty and his Man HEarty Here take this Note that you may not forget the Guests that are to be invited to my Daughters Wedding The man takes the Note and looks on it Can you read it Man I cannot tell Sir Hearty Let me hear if you can or not Man Imprimis Sir William Lovewell and the Lady Hypocondria his Wife Item Sir Henry Sage and the Lady Chastity his Wife Item Sir Edward Courtly and the Lady Iealousie his Wife and Mistris Iane Single her Sister Item Sir Thomas Cuckold and the Lady Wanton his Wife Item Sir Humphey Disagree and the Lady Disagree his Wife Item Sir Timothy Spendall and the Lady Poverty his Wife Item the Lady Procurer Item Monsieur Amorous Hearty Well read well read As for the Lord Widower I know he will not come for I hear his Lady is newly dead This is the Nature of the World some marry and some die Man Troth Sir of the two Evils I think it is better to die than to marry Hearty I am not of your mind for I had rather have a ruddy plain soft Wench to be my Bed-fellow than pale grim lean numb cold Death But go your way about this Imployment the whilst I will give direction for the Entertainment Exeunt Scene 11. Enter the Lord VVidower and the Lady Sprightly his Eldest Daughter and other small Children and Doll Subtilty all weeping LOrd We have reason to weep for you my Children have lost a good Mother and I a loving Wife and her servants a kind Lady but we cannot alter Heavens Decrees wherefore we must take comfort in what is and not grieve for what cannot be helpt And now Daughter Sprightly you must be as my Wife Friend and Daughter all in one for as your Mother did when she had health govern my Family so must you now she is dead and you must take care of your young Brothers and Sisters and Heaven will reward thee with a good Husband and Children of your own And as for her Maid here who hath taken great pains all the time of your Mothers sickness ought to be rewarded for her care wherefore Daughter let her wait upon you as she did upon your Mother Doll Subtilty I thank your Lordship Exeunt Scene 12. Enter all the Bridal Guests and pass over the Stage as thorough a Room Scene 13. Enter Monsieur Disguise as from the sea MOnsieur Disguise Surely the Fates have conspired against me the winds were so cross just like men sometimes for us and sometimes against us Enter a Skipper Have you found out the Gentlemans lodging Skipper Yes Sir Disguise And was he at home Skipper He hath that which will invite him to stay at home and keep him from wandring abroad for some time Sir Disguise What 's that Skipper A fair Wife Sir for a drunken Serving-man told me that one Sir Francis Inconstant had maried his Masters Daughter and that the Wedding-Feast would continue a Week if not a Fortnight Disguise And was the man drunk that told you so Skipper Yes surely he seem'd so to me Disguise Then perchance he might tell you a lye Skipper He was not so drunk but that he might tell a truth Disguise Prethee Friend do me one favour more and then I will pay thee for thy pains Skipper What you please to command me
not be seen unless to some particular persons or neer friends 1 Lady And how doth she become her Religious Habit 2 Lady So handsomely as she is far handsomer in her Pease habit than when she was drest with all the Arts of Vanityes 1 Lady What manner of Habit is it 2 Lady Somewhat like the Normetanes but much more becoming 1 Lady Well I will go to the Lady her Mother and intreat her to let me go with her to see her Daughter Exeunt Scene 28. Enter two Gentlemen 1 GEntleman 'T is said that now the Lady Perfection is incloystered that the Treaty goeth on betwixt the Arch-Prince and the Emperor Enter a Gentleman running as by they stay him 2 Gent. What 's the matter you run so hastily 1 Gent. I am running to give the Arch-Prince notice that his Neece is in labour and is so ill she is like to dy 2 Gent. We will not stay you then Exeunt Scene 29. Enter Mistriss Odd-Humour and her Maid Nan MIstriss Odd-Humour It 's said the Lady Perfection hath entered into a Religious Order she is happy would I were so Nan It is a question whether you would think your self so if you were as she is Mistriss Odd-Humour I think the happiest life is to be a Devote Nan Faith Mistriss you wish to be a Devote not so much out of a devotion as for a change in life as many wish to be marryed out of a desire to alter their course of life and when they are marryed they wish to be unmarried again so would you do if you were a Devote Mistriss Odd-Humour Oh no for though those that are married wish to be unmarried by reason Marriage is the most troublesome unquiet life that is but a Devotes life is the most peaceable and quiet life that is so as there is as much difference in the course of a Married life and an Incloystered life as between Heaven and Hell Nan Then the most part of the World prefers Hell before Heaven for more are Married than are Incloystered Mistriss Odd-Humour Truly by the course of the VVorld and the action of men one would think there would be more Devils in Hell than Saints in Heaven Exeunt Scene 30. Enter two Gentlemen 1 GEnt. You hear the news of the Princess delivery and her Death 2 Gent. Yes I heard she died as soon as delivered but she hath left a Son and Heir to her sorrowfull Husband 1 Gent. I do not believe her Husband is much troubled or grieved for her Death as his Father is 2 Gent. Indeed I think the young Lord had no great affections for her 1 Gent. No surely for he loves the Lady he was first married to so well as he could spare no love for any other woman 2 Gent. If that Lady had not entered into a Religious Order he might have remarried her but now he cannot 1 Gent. I believe that if the other Lady had known the Princess should have died so soon she would not have been so Religious as to have Incloystered her self from the VVorld and to ha' bard up her liberty with Vows 2 Gent. 'T is like when she hears of the Princesses Death she will repent the acts of devotion 1 Gent. Then Repentance is not always for acts of evill but sometimes of good 2 Gent. There is Repentance of all sorts and degrees and there are more enter into Religious Orders out of Discontent than for Love to God 1 Gent. That is an uncharitable opinion 2 Gent. Nay 't is not a bare Opinion that may be proved nor uncharitable to speak the truth Exeunt ACT IV. Scene 31. Enter Mistriss Odd-Humour and her Maid Nan MIstriss Odd-Humour Oh Nan I am undone for ever Nan As how Mistriss Mistriss Odd-Humour Why by your neglect and carelessness for your not watching my Fathers coming home to give me notice my Father hath found my Chair for I hearing him come run to hide a-way my Chair he coming and seeing me scuttle about the room imagined I desired to hide something from him for which he searches all my Chamber over at last he went and looked into the Cole-hole where I had flung my Chair and finding it he carried it a-way in one hand and led me a-long in the other hand and causing a fire to be made of the Chair made me stand by to see the Martyrdome whereat I was so afflicted as I lost my fight in tears which tears I let run on the fire hoping to quench it out but they were so brind with grief as they did rather augment the fury of the fire than abate the rage of the flame so that which I thought would have been a preserver did hasten the destruction Nan Faith Mistriss it is none of my fault for your Mother sent me of an errand and whilst I was absent by your Mothers commands it seem'd your Father came home Mistriss Odd-Humour This is an excuse Nan You may believe it 't is no excuse but truth for I that ventured the loss of my Soul by telling a lie to save your Chair would not neglect the watch had not I been commanded away Mistriss Odd-Humour I am of an opinion you were brib'd to betray the life of my Chair and bribes are so powerfull as they corrupt promises and vows even the Soul its self though the Soul makes no use of bribes yet it will venture to be damn'd for a bribes sake Nan Well Mistriss since a mistrust is all my reward you shall tell the next lie your self Mistriss Odd-Humour No prethee Nan let us be friends for I shall never get a Servant that will so readily tell lyes for me as you do wherefore let us shake hands and be friends They shake hands Nan VVell Mistriss let me tell you that my hand and tongue is at your service the one to work the other to lie for your service Mistriss Odd-Humour I thank you Nan for many Servants will lie but few will work Exeunt Scene 32. Enter two Gentlemen 1 GEnt. The Lord Melancholy hath such a sober sad Countenance as I never saw any young man have the like 2 Gent. Indeed I never saw him smile in my life 1 Gent. I askt a Gentleman that waits on him whether his Lord did ever smile he said he never saw him smile since he parted from his first Lady 2 Gent. Then he hath not smiled this nine years for so long it is since he parted from his first Lady 1 Gent. If the siege last one year more it will be as long a siege as the siege of Troy 2 Gent. Indeed the causes of either siege resembles each other as both for the love of fair Ladyes I know not whether the effect will prove alike as whether it will be the destruction of his heart as the siege of Troy was the destruction of Troy 1 Gent. But the Lord Melancholy is rather like Hellen than Menelaus for he hath had two wives and the Lady Perfection is as Menelaus for her
Husband is taken away from her as his wife was from him but leaving this siege let us return to our own homes Exeunt Scene 33. Enter the Lord Melancholy as the Grate of the Cloyster of the Lady Perfection then she draws the Curtain before the Grate and appears to him LOrd Melancholy Madam yesterday when you were pleased to speak with me as now through this Grate you were pleas'd to tell me your Vows were so binding as they could not be dissolved wherefore I am not now come to examine or perswade nor to trouble your Devotions or to hinder your Meditations but to take my last leave for I shall never see you more at least not in this VVorld Lady Perfection Are you going to Travel Lord Melancholy I cannot say my body is going a far Journey I know not what my Soul may do Lady Perfection Shall not they go together Lord Melancholy No Death will make a divorce as the Law did betwixt you and I Lady Perfection Are you resolved to dye Lord Melancholy Yes Lady Perfection VVhy so Lord Melancholy To be at rest and peace for know that ever since I was last married my life hath been a Hell my Mind was tortured with thoughts of discontent and though I am releast from what I did dislike my mind is restless still for what it would enjoy this resolution is not new it hath been long considered for since I cannot live with that I love better than life I le try whether the passions of the Soul doe with the Body dye if so Death will be happy because it hath no sense nor feeling Lady Perfection How long have you been resolved of leaving life Lord Melancholy I have pondered of it ever since I was last Married but was not resolved untill you enter'd into this Order Lady Perfection Can I not perswade you to live Lord Melancholy Not unless you break your Vow Lady Perfection That I may not do Lord Melancholy Nor can I perswade you for I love your Constancy Lady Perfection Will you grant me one request before you dy Lord Melancholy Yes any thing but what may hinder my dying Lady Perfection Swear to me you will Lord Melancholy I swear by Heaven and Love I will Lady Perfection Then the time you are resolved to dye come hither and dye here that I may bear you Company dying the same minute if I can that you do Lord Melancholy How Lady Perfection Nay you have sworn it and if it be best for you it will be so for me for when you are dead I shall possess those torments that you in life feel now and if you love me so well as you express you do you will not desire to leave me to endure that you cannot suffer Lord Melancholy 'T is fit you should live to be a President to the World Lady Perfection Were I a President fit for the World to follow yet the World would not practice my precepts it is too bad to follow what is good and since my life cannot better the World and Death will ease my life of that which will trouble and afflict it I am resolv'd to dye And in the grave will bear you Company Lord Melancholy I do accept of thy dear Company Heaven so joyn our Souls they never may be separated and to morrow we will leave the World Lady Perfection Let me advise you concerning the manner of our Deaths get a Sword pointed sharp at both ends and when we are to dye put one end of the Sword through this grate and just when you set your heart to the end towards you I will set mine to the end towards me and thrusting forward as to meet each other the several points will make several passages or wounds into our several or rather our own united hearts and so we dye just together Lord Melancholy I shall follow your advice and be here to morrow at the time Which time will seem to me like as an Age Till that our Souls be fled forth from their Cage Lady Perfection My Soul will fly your Soul to imbrace And after Death may hope a resting place Exeunt ACT V. Scene 34. Enter two Gentlemen 1 GEnt. You here the match is concluded betwixt the Emperors Daughter and our Prince 2 Gent. Yes and I hear that the Lord Dorato was a great Instrument to help the match forward 1 Gent. Methinks they should need no other Instrument to forward the match than the Princes interest 2 Gent. 'T is true but the Princes affection being placed upon another Lady it was hard first to draw off those affections and then to place them anew besides the Death of his Neece was some hinderance 1 Gent. All great Princes doe soon cast off all Funeral sadness but the Lord Dorato methinks takes the Death of his Daughter to heart 2 Gent. 'T is a doubt whether he will continue in such great favour with the Prince now his Neece is dead 1 Gent. There is no likelyhood he should be in less favour since the Princess Death for it was the favour he had with the Princess that caused the match with his Son besides he hath left a Son which the Prince no doubt will favour the Grandfather the more for the Childes sake 2 Gent. I wonder whether the Lord Melancholy the Princesses Husband will marry again for he had ill fortune with his Wives 1 Gent. Methinks he hath had good Fortune for the Laws have quitted him of one and Death of the other but that Husband hath ill fortune that neither Law nor Death will free him from Exeunt Scene 35. Enter the Lord Melancholy at the Grate the Curtains open and appears the Lady Perfection he takes the Sword out of the sheath LOrd Melancholy Sweet here 's that will quit us of all trouble Lady Perfection Indeed life is a trouble and nothing is at rest but what lyes in the grave Lord Melancholy Are you not affraid of the sight of a murthering Sword Lady Perfection No more than you are affraid of the sight of the glorious Sun Lord Melancholy You seem to have a courage above you Sex Lady Perfection My love is above Life as far as my Courage is beyond Fear I neither fear Death nor consider Life but can imbrace the one and fling away the other for Loves sake Lord Melancholy Then dear Wife for so you are my heart did never own another I wish our breaths and bloods might intermix together and as Deaths Ceremonies might joyn our Souls Whilst he speaks he puts one end of the Sword through the Grate she takes hold of it Lady Perfection They 'r joyned already by love and Death's sufficient to bring them both together and our bloods 't is like will run in trickling streams upon this Sword to meet and intermix Whilst he holds the Sword in one hand he unbuttons his Doublet with the other hand so she unties her Cord about her Gown Lord Melancholy These Buttons are like troublesome guests at
new Changes for stale Acquaintance is as unpleasant as want of change and the only hopes I have to the end of my Sute is that I am a Stranger and unknown for women fancy men beyond what they are when unknown and prize them less than their merits deserve when they are acquainted Monsieur Comerade Well we will not stay but we will do our indeavour to get admittance Exeunt Scene 25. Enter Madam Passionate as very ill sitting in a Chair groaning Enter Madam Jantil as to see her MAdam Iantil. Madam how do you find your health Madam Passionate Very bad for I am very ill but I wonder at your Fortitude that you can bear such a Cross as the loss of your Husband so patiently Madam Iantil. O Madam I am like those that are in a Dropsie their face seems full and fat but their liver is consumed and though my sorrow appears not outwardly yet my heart is dead within me Madam Passionate But your young years is a Cordiall to restore it and a new love will make it as healthfull as ever it was Enter Doll Pacify the Lady Passionat's Maid with a Porrenger of Cawdle Doll Pacify Pray Madam eat somthing or otherwise you will kill your self with fasting for you have not eaten any thing since the beginning of your sorrow Lady Passionate O carry that Cawdle away carry it away for the very sight doth overcome my Stomack Doll Pacify Pray Madam eat but a little Lady Passionate I care not for it I cannot eat it nor will not eat it wherefore carry it away or I will go away Both the Ladies goe out Enter Nell Careless Madam Jantils Maid Nell Careless Prethee if thy Lady will not eat this Cawdle give it me for I have an Appetite to it but I wonder you will offer your Lady any thing to eat but rather you should give her somthing to drink for I have heard sorrow is dry but never heard it was hungry Doll Pacify You are mistaken for sorrow is sharp and bites upon the Stomack which causes an eager Appetite Nell Careless I am sure weeping eyes make a dry Throat She eats and talks between each spoonfull Doll Pacify But Melancholy Thoughts make a hungry Stomack but faith if thou wert a Widow by thy eating thou wouldst have another Husband quickly Nell Careless Do you think I would marry again Doll Pacify Heaven forbid that a young woman should live a Widow Nell Careless Why is it a sin for a young woman to live a Widow Doll Pacify I know not what it would be to you but it would be a case of Conscience to me if I were a Widow Nell Careless By thy nice Conscience thou seem'st to be a Puritan Doll Pacify VVell I can bring many proofs but were it not a sin it is a disgrace Nell Careless VVhere lies the disgrace Doll Pacify In the opinion of the VVorld for old Maids and musty VVidows are like the plague shun'd of by all men which affrights young women so much as by running from it they catch hold on whatsoever man they meet without consideration of what or whom they are by which many times they fall into poverty and great misery Nell Careless You teach a Doctrine that to escape one mischief they fall on another which is worse than the first wherefore it were better to live a musty VVidow as you call them than a miserable VVife besides a man cannot intimately love a VVidow because he will be a Cuckold as being made one by her dead Husband and so live in Adultry and so she live in sin her self by Cuckolding both her Husbands having had two Doll Pacify I believe if you were a VVidow you would be tempted to that sin Nell Careless Faith but I should not for should I commit that sin I should deserve the Hell of discontent Doll Pacify Faith you would marry if you were young and fair and rich Nell Careless Those you mention would keep me from marrying for if any would marry me for the love of youth and beauty they would never love me long because time ruins both soon and if any one should marry me meerly for my riches they would love my riches so well and so much as there would be no love left for me that brought it and if my Husband be taken Prisoner by my wealth I shall be made a Slave Doll Pacify No not if you be virtuous Nell Careless Faith there is not one in an Age that takes a wife meerly for virtue nor valews a wife any thing the more for being so for poor Virtue fits mourning unregarded and despised not any one will so much as cast an eye towards her but all shun her as you say they do old Maids or musty Widows Doll Pacify Although you plead excellently well for not marrying yet I make no question but you would willingly marry if there should come a young Gallant Nell Careless What 's that a Fool that spends all his wit and money on his Clothes or is it a gallant young man which is a man enriched with worth and merit Doll Pacify I mean a Gallant both for bravery and merit Nell Careless Nay they seldome go both together Doll Pacify Well I wish to Heaven that Hymen would give thee a Husband and then that Pluto would quietly take him away to see whether you would marry again O I long for that time Nell Careless Do not long too earnestly lest you should miscarry of your desires Enter Madam Passionate whereat Nell Careless hearing her come she runs away Madam Passionate VVho was it that run away Doll Pacify Nell Careless Madam Iantils Maid Madam Passionate O that I could contract a bargain for such an indifferent mind as her young Lady hath or that the pleasures of the VVorld could bury my grief Doll Pacify There is no way for that Madam but to please your self still with the present times gathering those fruits of life that are ripe and next to your reach not to indanger a fall by climing too high nor to stay for that which is green nor to let it hang whilst it is rotten with time nor to murmur for that which is blowen down by chance nor to curse the weather of accidents for blasting the blossoms nor the Birds and VVorms of Death which is sickness and pain for picking and eating the berries for nature allows them a part as well as you for there is nothing in the VVorld we can absolutely possess to our selves for Time Chance Fortune and Death hath a share in all things life hath the least Madam Passionate I think so for I am weary of mine The Lady goes out Enter a Man Man Mistriss Dorothy there are two or three Gentlemen that desire to speak with one of the VVidows Maids and you belong to one Doll Pacify VVell what is their business Man I know not but I suppose they will only declare that to your self She goeth out and enters again as meeting the
no comfort left upon the Earth Let me consider Vegitable birth The new born virgin Lilly of the day In a few hours dyes withers away And all the odoriferous flow'rs that 's sweet Breath but a while and then with Death do meet The stouter Oak at last doth yield and must Cast his rough skin and crumble all to dust But what do Sensitives alas they be Beasts Birds and flesh to dy as well as we And harder minerals though longer stay Here for a time yet at the last decay And dye as all things else that 's in this World For into Deaths Arms every thing is hurll'd Alass poor man thou' rt in the worst Estate Thou diest as these yet an unhappier fate Thy life 's but trouble still of numerous passions Torments thy self in many various fashions Condemn'd thou art to vexing thoughts within When Beasts both live and dye without a sin O happy Beasts than grasing look no higher Or are tormented with thoughts Flaming fire Thus by thy self and others still annoid And made a purpose but to be destroyed Poor Man Here ends my Lord Marquesses Verses Muses some short time then kneels to the Tomb again and prayes as to her self then rises and bows to the Tomb so Exit Scene 14. Enter two Gentlemen 1 GEnt. What news Sir of our Armies abroad 2 Gent. Why Sir thus in the time of our Masculine Armies recruiting the Female Army had taken the Fort they besieged where upon the taking of that Fort many considerable Towns and strong holds surrendred and submitted to the Female Army whereupon the Lady Victoria sent to her Husband to bring his Army when the General and all the Masculine Army came to the Female Army much mirth and jesting there was betwixt the Heroicks and Heroickesses and so well they did agree as the Female Army feasted the Masculine Army and then gave the possession of the surrendred Towns to the Lord General and the Lady Victoria and all her Army kept themselves in and about the Fort laying all their victorious spoils therein and whilst the Masculine Army is gone to Conquer the Kingdome of Faction they stay there upon the Frontiers passing their time in Heroick sports as hunting the Stags wild Boars and the like and those that have the good Fortune to kill the Chase is brought to the Fort and Trenches in Triumph and is Queen untill another Chase is kill'd but we hear the Masculine Army goeth on with victorious success 1 Gent. I am very glad to hear it Exeunt Scene 15. Enter Doll Pacify and Nell Careless NEll Careless O Doll I hear thy Lady is married and not only married but she hath married a very young man one that might be her Grand-Son or Son at least Doll Pacify Yes yes my Lady doth not intend to live with the dead as your Lady doth but to have the Company and pleasure of that which hath most life which is a young man Nell Careless Her marriage was very sudden Doll Pacify So are all inconsiderated marriages but happy is the wooing that is not long a doing Nell Careless If I had been your Lady I would have prolonged the time of my wooing for the wooing time is the happiest time Doll Pacify Yes if she had been as young as you or your Lady but time bids my Lady make haste Exeunt Scene 16. Enter two Gentlemen 1 GEnt. Do you hear the news 2 Gent. What news 1 Gent. Why the news is that all the Kingdome of Faction hath submitted to the Kingdome of Reformation and that the Armies are returning home 2 Gent. I am glad of it Exeunt Scene 17. Enter Madam Passionate alone MAdam Passionate O unfortunate woman that I am I was rich and lived in plenty none to control me I was Mistriss of my self Estate and Family all my Servants obeyed me none durst contradict me but all flattered me filling my Ears with praises my Eyes with their humble bow and respectfull behaviours devising delightfull sports to entertain my time making delicious meats to please my palat sought out the most comfortable drinks to strengthen and encrease my Spirits thus did I live luxuriously but now I am made a Slave and in my old Age which requires rest and peace which now Heaven knows I have but little of for the minstrels keep me waking which play whilst my Husband and his Whores dance and he is not only contented to live riotously with my Estate but sits amongst his Wenches and rails on me or else comes and scoffs at me to my face besides all my Servants slight and neglect me following those that command the purse for this idle young fellow which I have married first seized on all my goods then let Leases for many lives out of my Lands for which he had great fines and now he cuts down all my VVoods and sells all my Lands of Inheritance which I foolishly and fondly delivered by deed of gift the first day I married devesting my self of all power which power had I kept in my own hands I might have been used better whereas now when he comes home drunk he swears and storms and kiks me out of my warm Bed and makes me sit shivering and shaking in the Cold whilst my Maid takes my place but I find I cannot live long for age and disorders bring weakness and sickness and weakness and sickness bring Death wherefore my marriage Bed is like to prove my grave whilst my Husbands Curses are my passing Bell hay ho Exit Scene 18. Enter two Gentlemen 1 GEnt. I hear the Army is returning home 2 Gent. Yes for they are returned as far back as to the Effeminate Army and all the Masculine Commanders have presented all the Female Commanders with their spoils got in the Kingdome of Faction as a tribute to their heroical acts and due for their assistance and safety of their lives and Country 1 Gent. And do not you hear what privileges and honours the King and his Counsel hath resolved and agreed upon to be given to the Female Army and the honours particularly to be given the Lady Victoria 2 Gent. No 1 Gent. Why then I will tell you some the Lady Victoria shall be brought through the City in triumph which is a great honour for never any one makes triumphs in a Monarchy but the King himself then that there shall be a blank for the Female Army to write their desires and demands also there is an Armour of gold and a Sword a making the hilt being set with Diamonds and a Chariot all gilt and imbrodered to be presented to the Lady Victoria and the City is making great preparation against her arrival 2 Gent. Certainly she is a Lady that deserves as much as can be given either from Kings States or Poets Exeunt Scene 19. Enter the Lady Jantil as being sick brought by two men in a Chair and set by the Tomb of her dead Lord and many Servants and Friends about her weeping MAdam Iantil. VVhere