Madamoiselle Esperance Have I not reason Tell-truth No truly for a Man may do such light actions or speak merrily or solidly without an evill design only to pass a way idle time Madamoiselle Esperance Lord how idly you speak Cousin as to think men might idly pass away their time when Nature allows life no idle time for all things are growing or decaying feeding life or getting food for to nourish life or bearing or breeding for increase and man which only by his shape exceeds all other Creatures in Reason Knowledge and Understanding and will you have him cast away these supreme gifts of Nature with idle time would you have men follow the Sense only like a Beast and not to be guided by reason to some noble study or profitable action would you have them yield to their surfeting Appetites and not indeavour to temper them is Sickness less painfull than Health is Disorder to be prefer'd before Method or Inconveniency before Conveniency Warrs before Peace Famine before Plenty Vice before Virtue all which would be if idle time wery allow'd for Idleness never found out Arts nor Sciences or rules of Government nor the ease of Temperance nor the profit of Prudence nor the commands of Fortitude nor the peace of Justice which Industry produceth but Idleness brings Confusion Exeunt Scene 10. Enter Monsieur Heroick with his Sword bloody and meets his friend Monsieur Amy. AMy. What hast thou been doing that thy sword is bloody Heroick Fighting Amy. With whom Heroick I know not Amy. For what did you fight Heroick For nothing or at least as bad as nothing for that I never saw nor heard of nor knew where to find Amy. This is a strange quarrel that you neither know the man nor the cause it was a mad quarrel Heroick You say right for as for my part I had little reason to fight I know not what my opposite had but prithy friend go help him for he lyes yonder and I doubt he is deadly wounded the whilst I will seek a Chirurgion to send to him Amy. You had need seek one for your self for you bleed I see by your shirt Heroick Yes so I will but it shall be the Lady that was cause of the wounds and I will try if her Beauty can heal them Exeunt Scene 11. Enter Monsieur Nobilissimo and Madamoiselle Amor NObilissimo My sweet Mistriss what is the cause you look so pale and Melancholy Amor I hear you have forsaken me and making love to another which I no sooner heard but shook with fear like to a tender Plant blown by a Northern wind wherewith my blood congeal'd with cold my thoughts grew sad and gathered like black Clouds which makes my head hang down my face all wither'd pale and dry but did I love as many do for Person not for Mind your Inconstancy would be a less Crime but were your Body as curious made as Natures skill could form you and not a Soul answerable I might Admire you but not Love you with adoration as I do Nobilissimo Fear not for as thy Tongue unlocks my Ears so it locks up my Heart from all thy Sex but thee and as a Cabinet doth keep thy Picture there Amor Heaven grant my Tongue may never rust but move with words as smoothed with Oyl turned by the strength of Wit easy and free Nobilissimo Dear Mistriss banish this Jealousy it may in time corrupt pure love and be you confident of my Affection as of your own Virtue Amor Your kind words I will take for a sufficient Seal and never doubt the Bond that Love hath made Exeunt Scene 12. Enter Monsieur Phantasie wounded being lead between Madamoiselle Bon and Monsieur Amy he seems to be so faint as not to pass any further but is forced to ly down Madamoiselle sits by him AMy. I will go fetch more help and Chirurgions Monsieur Amy goes out Madamoiselle Bon stayes and holds her Arm under his head Phantasie I am wounded more with thoughts of Sorrow than with my opposites Sword and wish that Death would strike me in thy Arms that I might breath my last there offer up my Soul upon the Altar of thy Breast and yield my life a Sacrifice unto thy Constancy Madamoiselle Bon. May Death exchange and take my life that is useless to the World and spare yours for noble actions to build a fame thereon Phantasie Speak not so Madamoiselle Bon. If my words offend you my tongue for ever shall be Dumb Phantasie No it is your Wish offends and not your Words for they are Musick to my Ears or like to drops of Balsom powr'd therein to heal my wounded Soul Madamoiselle Bon. If that my words could cure your wounds that bleed rather than want I le speak till all my breath were spent no life to form words with She weeps Phantasie Why do you weep Madamoiselle Bon. To see you bleed but if you bleed to Death I will weep to Death and as life issues through your Wounds so shall life issue through my Eyes and drown it self in floods of tears Phantasie Forbear let not the Earth drink up those tears those precious tears the Gods thirst after Enter Men and take him up and lay him forth Exeunt Scene 13. Enter Madamoiselle Grand Esprit and her Audience GRand Esprit Venus thou Goddess fair for thy Sons sake Cupid the God of Love O let me make A Banquet of sweet Wit to entertain This Noble Company and feast each brain And let each several Ear feed with delight Not be disturb'd with foul malicious spight Noble and Right Honourable I shall take my discourse at this time out of Beauty the ground of which discourse is Eyes Eyes are the Beauty of Beauty for if the Eyes be not good the face though ne'r so fair or otherwise well featur'd cannot be pleasing the truth is Eyes are the most Curious Ingenious Delightfull and Profitable work in Nature Curious in the Aspect and Splendor Ingenious in the form and fashion Delightfull in the Society and Profitable in their Commerce Trade and Traffick that they have with all the rest of Natures works for had not Nature made Eyes all her works had been lost as being buryed in everlasting darkness for it is not only Light that shews her works but Eyes that see her works wherefore if Nature had not made Eyes she had lost the glory of Admiration and Adoration which all her Animal Creatures give her begot raised or proceeding from what they see besides not only Light the presenter of objects would have been lost but Life would have been but only a dull Melancholy Motion for want of sight and for want of sight life would have wanted knowledge and so would have been ignorant both of its self and Nature but now life takes delight by the fight through the Eyes and is inamor'd with the Beauties it views and the Eyes do not only delight themselves and life with what they receive but
Trusty Beshrew your tongue wife for speaking so sharply to our young Lady she was left to our trust care and tender usage and not to be snapt and quarrelled with Nurse Fondly Yes and you would betray your trust to her childish folly Foster Trusty No that I would not neither would I venture or yield up her life to loves melancholly Nurse Fondly Come Come husband you humour her too much and that will spoile her I am sure Ex. Scene 8. Enter Sir Peaceable Studious with a Book in his hand a Table being set out whereon is Pen Ink and Paper After he hath walked a turn or two with his eyes fixt upon the ground he sits down to the Table and begins to write Enter the Lady Ignorant his Wife LAdy Ignorant Lord Husband I can never have your company for you are at all times writing or reading or turning your Globes or peaking thorough your Prospective Glasse or repeating Verses or speaking Speeches to your self Sir P. Studious Why wife you may have my company at any time Nay never to be from me if you please for I am alwaies at home Lady Ignorant 'T is true your person is alwaies at home and fixt to one place your Closet as a dull dead statue to the side of a wall but your mind and thoughts are alwaies abroad Sir P. Studious The truth is my mind sometimes sends out my thoughts like Coye ducks to bring more understanding in Lady Ignorant You mistake Husband for your thoughts are like vain or rather like false Scouts that deceives your understanding imprisons your senses and betrayes your life to a dull solitariness Sir P. Studious 'T is better to live a quiet solitary life than a troublesome and an uneasie life Lady Ignorant What is a man born for but to serve his Countrey side with his friends and to please the effeminate Sex Sir P. Studious You say right wife and to serve his Countrey is to finde out such inventions as is usefull either in Peace or War and to form order and settle Common-wealths by Devizing Laws which none but studious brains e're did or can do T is true practice doth pollish beauty and adorn but neither layes the Foundation nor brings the Materials nor builds the walls thereof and to side with friends is to defend Right and Truth with sound arguments and strong proofs from the tyrannical usurpation of false opinions vain phantasines malicious satires and flattering oratorie and to please the effeminate Sex is to praise their beauty wit vertue and good graces in soft Numbers and smooth Language building up Piramides of poetical praises Printing their fame thereon by which they live to After-ages Lady Ignorant Prithy Husband mistake us not for women cares not for wide mouthed fame and we take more delight to speak our selves whilst we live than to be talked of when we are dead and to take our present pleasures than to abstain our selves for After-ages Sir P. Studeous Well wife what would you have me do Lady Ignorance Why I would have you so sociable as to sit and discourse with our friends and acquaintance and play the good fellow amongst them Sir P. Studious What need we to have any other friends than our selves our studies books and thoughts Lady Ignorance Your studies books and thoughts are but dull acquaintance melancholly companions and weak friends Sir P. Studious You do not wife consider their worth for books are conversable yet silent acquaintance and study is a wise Counsellor and kind friends and poetical thoughts are witty Companions wherein other Societies and Companies are great inconveniences and oftimes produces evil effects as Jealousie Adulterie Quarrels Duels and Death besides slanders backbitings and the like Lady Ignorance Truly Husband you are strangely mistaken for those Societies as I would have you frequent doth Sing Dance Rallie make Balls Masks Playes Feasts and the like and also makes Frollicks or Rubices or Playes at Questions and Commands Purposes or Ridles and twenty such like Pastimes and fine sports they have Sir P. Studious But surely Wife you would not like this kind of life nor I neither especially if we were in one and the same Company for perchance you may hear wanton Songs sung and see amorous glances or rude or immodest Actions and when you dance have a secret nip and gentle gripe of the band silently to declare their amorous affections and when you are at Questions or Commands you will be commanded to kiss the men or they you which I shall not like neither should you or if they are commanded to pull of your Garter which no chast and modest woman will suffer nor no gallant man or honourable husband will indure to stand by to see and if you refuse you disturb the rest of the Company and then the women falls out with you in their own defence and the men takes it as an affront and disgrace by reason none refuses but you This causes quarrels with Strangers or quarrels betwixt our selves Lady Ignorant 'T is true if the Company were not Persons of Quality which were civilly bred but there is no rude Actions or immodest behaviours offered or seen amongst them Besides if you do not like those sports you may play at Cardes or Dice to pass away the time Sir P. Studious But Wife let me examine you have or do you frequent these Societies that you speak so Knowingly Learnedly and Affectionately of Lady Ignorance No otherwise Husband but as I have heard which reports makes me desire to be acquainted with them Sir P. Studious Well you shall and I will bear you company to be an Eye-witness how well you behave your self and how you profit thereby Lady Ignorance Pray Husband do for it will divert you from your too serious studies and deep thoughts which feeds upon the health of your body which will shorten your life and I love you so well as I would not have you dye for this I perswade you to is for your good Sir P. Studious We will try how good it is Ex. Scene 9. Enter Nurse Fondley and Foster Trusty her Husband NUrse Fondly How shall I keep your Journey secret but that every body will know of it Foster Trusty We will give out that such a deep melancholly have seized on her since her Fathers death as she hath made a vow not to see any creature besides your self for two years As for me that I have lived so solitary a life with my solitary Master this Ladies Father that I have few or no acquaintance besides I will pretend some business into some other parts of the Kingdom and I having but a little Estate few will inquire after me Nurse Fondly So in the mean time I must live solitary all alone without my Husband or Nurse-childe which Childe Heaven knows I love better than if I had one living of my own Foster Trusty I am as fond of her as you are and Heaven knows would most willingly sacrifice my old life could
honest soul and heart that is ready to serve you in any honest way but since I am deceived and couzened into love by false reports finding the best of man-kind basely wicked and all the World so bad that praise nothing good and strives to poyson vertue I will inancor my self and live on Antidotes of prayers for fear of the infection Lord Singul. And I will not you pray for me Affectionata I cannot chose my Lord for gratitude inforces me First because I have loved you next because I have served you and give me leave to kiss your hand and then there drop some tears at my departure Weeping kneels down and kisses her hand Lord Singularity Rise you must not go away until you have cleared your self from being a spie Affectionata I fear no accusations Exeunt FINIS THE SECOND PART OF LOVES ADVENTURES THe Lord Singularity Sir Serious Dumb Sir Timothy Compliment Sir Humphry Bold Sir Roger Exception Sir Peaceable Studious Foster Trusty Collonels Captains Lieutenants and Corporals Petitioners Officers Messengers Iudges Iuries Servants The Lady Orphant Lady Bashfull Lady Ignorance Lady Wagtail Lady Amorous Nurse Fondly Mistriss Reformer Lady Bashfulls woman Chamber-maids EPILOGUE NOble Spectators you have spent this day Not only for to see but judge our Play Our Authoress sayes she thinks her Play is good If that her Play be rightly understood If not 't is none of her fault for she writ The Acts the Scenes the Language and the Wit Wherefore she sayes that she is not your Debtor But you are hers until you write a better Of even terms to be she understands Impossible except you clap your hands THE SECOND PART ACT I. Scene 1. Enter the Lady Bashfulls Chamber-maid and Mrs. Reformer her woman REformer This dumb Lower is the most diligent'st servant that ever was and methinks my Lady is somewhat more confident than she was for she will sit and read whilst he sits by Maid Doth she read to him Reformer No she reads to herself Maid There comes abundance of Gallants to visit my Lady every day and they have all one answer that is she is not willing to receive visits and they all go civilly away unless Sir Humphry Bold and he rails horribly Reformer I have received from several Gentlemen above 20. Letters a day and as fast as they come she makes me burn them Maid But she reads them first Reformer No I read them to her Maid And doth she answer all those Letters Reformer She never answered one in her life and I dare swear she never will The Lady Bashfull calls as within another Room Reformer Madam Exeunt Scene 2. Enter the Lord Singularity and Affectionata Lord Singularity Affectionata Hast thou forgiven me my fault of doubting of thy vertue so much as to put it to a Tryal Affectionata My Noble Lord have you forgiven my facility and wavering faith that could so easily and in so short a time believe you could be wicked although you did accuse your self Lord Singularity Nay Affectionata I did not accuse my self though I did try thee Affectionata Then I have committed a treble fault through my mistake which requires a treble forgiveness Lord Singularity Thou art so vertuous thou canst not commit a fault and therefore needs no forgiveness Exeunt Scene 3. Enter the Lady VVagtail and Sir Humphry Bold SIr Humpry Bold Madam You have been pleased to profess a friendship to me and I shall desire you will do a friendly part for me Lady Wagtail Any thing that lyes in my power good Sir Humphry Bold Sir Humphry Bold Then pray Madam speak to the Lady Bashfull in my behalf that I may be her Husband Lady Wagtail I will Sir Humphry but she is bashfull yet I was there Yesterday and she entertained me indifferently well but seemed to be wonderfull coy but howsoever I will do my poor indeavour Sir Humphry Sir Humphry Bold Pray do Madam Exeunt Scene 4. Enter Affectionata walking in a melancholly posture his Hat pulled over his brows and his arms inter-folded To him enters the Lord Singularity LOrd Singularity My Affectionata Why walks thou so melancholly He pulls of his Hat to his Lord and Bows Affectionata The cause is not that I lye under an aspersion by reason I lye not under a crime But truly my Lord I am troubled that I am threatened to be tormented for I would not willingly indure pain though I could willingly receive death but as for the aspersions I am no wayes concerned for I make no question but my honest life my just actions and the truth of my words will so clear me at the last as I shall appear as innocent to the World as Angels doth in Heaven Lord Singularity Comfort your self for I will rather suffer death than you shall suffer pain Affectionata Heaven defend you my Lord whatsoever I suffer Ex. Scene 5. Enter the Lady VVagtail and Mistriss Reformer LAdy Wagtail Pray Mistriss Reformer be Sir Humphry Bold's friend to thy Lady and I protest to thee he shall be thy friend as long as he and you live and I do not see any reason your Lady should refuse him for he is both as proper and stout a man as any is living this day in the Land Reformer Indeed Madam I dare not mention it to my Lady for she is so adverse against marriage as she takes those for her enemies as doth but mention it Lady Wagtail Then surely she is not a woman for there is none of the effeminate Sex but takes it for a disgrace to live an old maid and rather than dye one they will marry any man that will have them and the very fear of not marrying is so terrible to them as whilst they are so young as they are not fit to make wives they will miserably cast away themselves to the first that makes a proffer although they be poor base or mean rather than venture to try out their fortunes Reformer But my Lady is not of that humour Lady Wagtail Come come I know thou canst perswade thy Lady if thou wouldst and if you will Sir Humphry Bold will give thee 500 l. to buy thee a Husband for thou hast lived too long a maid I faith Reformer I am not a maid Madam I am a widow Lady Wagtail What a musty widow Reformer I know not whether I am musty but I am a widow Lady Wagtail Let mee tell thee that it is as great a disgrace to live a widow as an old maid wherefore take thee 500 l. to get thee a second Husband Reformer Truly I would not sell my Lady for all the World much less for 500 l. neither would I marry again if I were young and might have my choyce Lady Wagtail Lord bless me and send me out of this house least it should infect me for let me tell thee were my Husband dead to morrow I would marry the day after his Funeral if I could get any man to marry me and so I would serve 20. Husbands
rudely to contradict you Bon Compaignon It is neither erroneous nor vain to believe a truth Lady Doltche Nor civil to make a doubt Sir but I am obliged unto you for that you help to cover my defects and wants in nature with your civil commendation and your kind estimation of me Ex. Scene 11. Enter Monsieur Importunate and Madamosel Caprisia IMportunate My fair wit you look as if you were angry with me Capris. You dwell not so long in my mind as to make me angry my thoughts are strangers to your figures She offers to go away and he holds her from going Importunate Nay faith now I have you I will keep you perforce untill you pay me the kiss you owe me Capris. Let me go for I had rather my eyes were eternally seal'd up my ears for ever stopt close from sound than hear or see you I care not whether you hear or see me so you will kisse me Capris. Let me go or otherwise my lips shall curse you and my words being whetted with injurie are become so sharp as they will wound you Importunate I will keep you untill your words begs for mercy in the most humblest stile and after the most mollifying manner Capris. Hell take you or Earth devoure you like a beast never to rise Importunate Love strike your heart with shooting thorough your eyes Capris. May you be blown up with pride untill you burst into madnesse may your thoughts be more troubled than rough waters more raging than a tempest may your senses feel no pleasure your body find no rest nor your life any peace Importunate May you love me with a doting affection may I be the only man you will imbrace and may you think me to be as handsome as Narcissus did himself Capris. You appear to me in all the horrid shapes that fancy can invent Enter Madam Mere Madam Mere Why how now daughter alwayes quarreling Capris. Can you blame me when I am beset with rudeness and assaulted with uncivil actions Madam Mere Let her alone Monsieur Importunate for she is a very Shrew Importunate Well go thy wayes for all the Shrews that ever nature made you are the cursest one Ex. Scene 12. Enter Madamosel Volante and a Grave Matron Volante I am not of the humour as most vvomen are vvhich is to please themselves vvith thinking or rather believing that all men that looks on them are in love vvith them But I take pleasure that all men that I look on should think I am in love vvith them vvhich men vvill soon believe being as self-conceited as vvomen are Matron But vvhere is the pleasure Lady Volante Why in seeing their phantastical garbs their strutting postures their smiling faces and the jackanapesly actions and then I laugh in my mind to think vvhat fools they are so as I make my self merry at their folly and not at my own Matron But men vvill appear as much Jackanapeses when they are in love vvith you as if they thought you vvere in love vvith them for all Lovers are apish more or less Volante I grant all Lovers are but those that think themselves beloved appears more like the grave Babboon than the skipping Iackanapes for though their actions are as ridiculous yet they are vvith more formality as being more circumspectly foolish or self-conceitedly vain Matron Well for all your derisions and gesting at men I shall see you at one time or other shot vvith Cupids arrovv Volante By deaths dart you may but never by loves arrovv for death hath povver on me though love hath none Matron There is an old saying that time importunity and opportunity vvins the chastest She vvhen those are joyned vvith vvealth and dignity but to yield to a lawfull love neither requires much time nor pleading if the Suiters have but Person Title and Wealth which women for the most part do prize before valour wisdom or honesty Volante Women hath reason to prefer certainties before uncertainties for mens Persons Titles and Wealths are visible to their view and knowledge but their Valours Wisdoms and Honesties doth rest upon Faith for a coward may fight and a fool may speak rationally and act prudently sometimes and a knave may appear an honest man Marrons They may so but a valiant man will never act the part of a coward nor a wise man prove a fool nor an honest man appear a knave Volante There can be no proof of any mans Valour Wisdom or Honesty but at the day of his death in aged years when as he hath past the danger in Wars the tryals in Miseries the malice of Fortune the temptations of Pleasures the inticements of Vice the heights of Glory the changes of Life provokers of Passion deluders of Senses torments of Pain or painfull Torments and to chose a Husband that hath had the Tryals and experiences of all these is to chose a Husband out of the Grave and rather than I will marry death I will live a maid as long as I live and when I dye let death do what he will with me Ex. Scene 13. Enter Monsieur Profession in mourning then enters his Friend Monsieur Comorade MOnsieur Comorade Well met I have travelled thorough all the Town and have inquired of every one I could speak to and could neither hear of thee nor see thee Profession It were happy for me if I had neither ears nor eyes Comorade Why what is the matter man He observes his mourning and then starts Gods-me Now I perceive thou art in mourning which of thy Friends is dead Profession The chiefest friend I had which mas my heart For that is dead being kill'd with my Mistress cruelty and buryed in her inconstancy Comorade I dare swear not the whole heart for every mans heart is like a head of Garlick which may be divided into many several cloves Wherefore cheer up man for it is but one clove that death or love hath swallowed down into his Stomach to cure him of the wind-cholick and since thy heart hath so many cloves thou mayst well spare him one and be never the worse But if it be buryed as you say in your Mistresses inconstancy it is to be hop'd it will be converted into the same inconstant humour and that will cure the other part of thy heart Profession O! She was the Saint of my thoughts and the Goddesse of my soul Comorade Prethee let me be thy moral Tutor to instruct thee in the knowledge of Truth and to let thee know that vertue is the true Goddesse to which all men ought to bow to and that youth beauty and wealth are sixt to be forsaken when vertue comes in place and vertue is constant both to its principals and promises Wherefore if thy Mistresse be inconstant she cannot be vertuous wherefore let her go Monsieur Profession fetches a great sigh and goes out without speaking a word Comorade alone Comorade I think his heart is dead in good earnest for it hath no sense of what I have
Doctor help may be found in giving directions and ordering the cordial Doctor So I understand you would have my counsel what you should do and my industry to order and get a meeting between Monsieur Discretion and you and to make the match betwixt you Volante You understand me right Doctor VVell I will study the means and trye if I can procure thee a man Volante Good fortune be your guide Doctor And Monsieur Discretion your Husband Ex. Scene 41. Enter Madamosel Caprisia alone CApris. Thoughts be at rest for since my love is honest and the person I love worthy I may love honourably for he is not only learned with study experienced with time and practice but he is natures favourite she hath endued his soul with uncontrouled reason his mind with noble thoughts his heart with heroick generosity and his brain with a supream wit Besides she hath presented his judgement and understanding with such a clear Prospective-glasse of speculations and such a Multiplying-glass of conception as he seeth farther and discerns more into natures works than any man she hath made before him She slops a little time then speaks But let me consider I have us'd this worthy Gentleman uncivilly nay rudely I have dispised him wherefore he cannot love me for nature abhors neglect and if he cannot love me in honesty he ought not to marry me and if I be not his wife for certain I shall dye for love or live a most unhappy life which is far worse than death Hay ho Enter Madam la Mere her Mother Mere What Daughter sick with love Capris. O Mother love is a Tyrant which never lets the mind be at rest and the thoughts are the torments and when the mind is tormented the body is seldom in health Mere Well to ease you I will go to this Lord Generosity and pray him to give you a visit Capris. By no means Mother for I had rather dye with love than live to be despised with scorn for he will refuse your desires or if he should come it would be but to express his hate or proudly triumph on my unhappy state Madamosel Caprisia goes out Madamosel Mere alone Mere She is most desperately in love but I will endeavour to settle her mind Ex. Scene 42. Enter Doctor Freedom and Madamosel Volante DOctor Am not I a good Doctor now that hath got you a good Husband Volante Nay Doctor he is but a Suiter as yet Doctor Why do not you woe upon the Stage as the rest of your Comorades doth Volante O fye Doctor Discretion never whines our love in publick Doctor So you love to be in private Volante Why Doctor the purest love is most conceal'd it lyes in the heart and it warms it self by its own fire Doctor Take heed for if you keep it too tenderly and close it may chance to catch cold when it comes abroad Volante True love ought to keep home and not to gossip abroad Enter a Servant-maid Servant-maid Madam Monsieur Discretion is come to visit you Volante Come Doctor be a witnesse of our contract Doctor I had rather stay with your maid Volante She hath not wit to entertain you Doctor Nor none to anger me Volante Pray come away for no wise man is angry with wit Doctor I perceive if I do not go with you that you will call me fool Ex. Scene 43. Enter Monsieur Comorade and Monsieur Bon Compaignon BOn Compaignon Comorade what cause makes you so fine to day Comorade I am going to two weddings to day Bon Compaignon Faith one had been enough but how can you divide yourself betwixt two Bridals Comorade I shall not need to divide my self since the Bridals keeps together for they are marryed both in one Church and by one Priest and they feast in one house Bon Compaignon And will they lye in one bed Comorade No surely they will have two beds for fear each Bride-groom should mistake his Bride Bon Compaignon VVell I wish the Bride-grooms and their Brides joy and their Guests good chear Comorade VVill not you be one of the Guests Bon Compaignon No for a Bon Compaignon shuns Hymens Court neither will Hymen entertain him But who are the Brides and Bride-grooms Comorade Monsieur Nobilissimo and Madamosel Doltche and Monsieur Perfection and Madamosel Solid Bon Compaignon Is Monsieur Profession a Guest there Comorade No for he swears now that he hates marriage as he hates death Bon Compaignon But he loves a Mistress as he loves life Ex. Scene 44. Enter Monsieur Generosity and Madamosel Caprisia he following her GEnerosity Lady why do you shun my company in going from me praystay and give my visit a civil entertainment for though I am not worthy of your affection yet my love deserves you civility Capris. I know you are come to laugh at me which is ignobly done for heroick generous spirits doth not triumph on the weak effeminate Sex Generosity Pray believe I am a Gentleman for if I loved you not yet I would never be rude to be uncivil to you or your Sex But I love you so well as when I leave to serve you with my life may nature leave to nourish me fortune leave to favour me and Heaven leave to blesse me and then let death cast me into Hell there to be tormented Capris. I am more obliged to your generous affections than to my own merits Generosity The ill opinion of your self doth not lessen your vertues and if you think me worthy to be your Husband and will agree we will go strait to Church and be marryed Capri. I shall not refuse you Ex. FINIS PROLOGUE THE Poetress sayes that if the Play be bad She 's very sorry and could wish she had A better plot more wit and skill to make A Play that might each several humour take But she sayes if your humours are not fixt Or that they are extravagantly mixt Impossible a Play for to present With such variety and temperiment But some will think it tedious or find fault Say the Design or Language is stark naught Besides the loose unsetled brains she fears Seeth with squint eyes and hears with Asses ears But she is confident all in this round Their understandings clear and judgements sound And if her Play deserves not praise she knows They 'l neither scoff in words nor preposterous shows Without disturbance you will let it dye And in the Grave of silence let it lye Youths Glory and Deaths Banquet THE FIRST PART 1. THe Lord de L'amour 2. Sir Thomas Father Love 3. Master Comfort Sir Thomas Father Loves Friend 4. Master Charity the Lord de L'amours Friend 5. Adviser the Lord de L'amours man 6. A Iustice of Peace 1. The Queen Attention 2. The Lady Incontinent Mistriss to the Lord de L'amour 3. The Lady Mother Love wife to Sir Thomas Father Love 4. The Lady Sanparelle daughter to Sir Thomas Father and Lady Mother Love 5. The Lady Innocence the affianced Mistriss
mankind Oh! Oh! that these Melancholy damps arising from my afflicted Soul could extinguish the Lamp of life or that my sad and grieved thoughts that feed upon my troubled Spirits could bite with sorrows teeth the thread of life asunder She sits down on the ground leaning her Cheek on her hand and weeps Enter to her her Maid Passive Passive My sweet Mistriss why do you weep Lady Innocence The spring of grief doth send forth streams of tears to wash off my disgrace and the foul spots which slandring tongues have stain'd or rather slain'd my reputation for which my eyes did they not weep would seem unnaturally unkind but my dead reputation is imbalm'd with salt tears bitter groans shrowded in sorrows and intomb'd in misery Passive My dear Lady you are imbalm'd with the pretious gums of Virtue and sweet spices of wit wrapt up in youth and beauty and are intombed or rather inthroned in honest hearts wherefore waste not your self with grief for certainly the world will condemn your Accusers and not you Lady Innocence Those feeble hopes cannot my spirits uphold they give no light of comfort to my mind for black despair like Melancholy night mustles my thoughts and makes my Soul as blind O but why do I thus mourn in sad complaints and do not curse Fortune Fates and destiny their Wheels there spindel threads and Chains She heaves up her hands and lifts up her eyes May Nature great turn all again to nought That nothing may with joy receive a thought She goes out in a very Melancholy posture Passive alone She is deeply Melancholy Heavens ease her mind Ex. Scene 12. Enter 2. or 3. Doctors 1. DOctor The Lady Sanspareile cannot live for the hath no pulse 2. Doctor No she is descending to the grave 3. Doctor But had we best tell her Father so 1. Doctor No by no means as yet 2. Doctor Why not he will know when she is dead Enter the Lady Mother Love as to the Doctors Lady Mother Love Mr. Doctors What do you mean to let my Daughter dye will you not prescribe something to give her 1. Doctor Madam we shall do our best you may be confident Lady Mother What if you prescribed a Glister or a Purge 1. Doctor I shall not need Madam Lady Mother Why if any one be sick they ought to have some remedies applyed to them 2. Doctor We shall consider what course is best to be taken Lady Mother Love For Gods sake do not neglect her Ex. Enter Sir Thomas Father Love to the Doctors Sir Thomas Father Love Mr. Doctors what is your opinion of my Daughter 1. Doctor Truly Sir she is very dangerous sick Sir Thomas Father Love I can find no pulse she hath 2. Doctor Nor we Sir that makes us doubt her Father Love Pray consult about her what is best to be done 1. Doctor We shall Sir Ex. Scene 13. Enter the Lord de l'Amour and the Lady Innocence LOrd de l'Amour What makes you look so gastly pale Lady Innocence I am so ashamed of my accusation as my bashfullness is beyond all blushing as greatest griefs are beyond all tears it causes my limbs to tremble face look pale like Death's assault making my courage fail Lord de l'Amour Perchance you are asham'd to confess so base a crime you may confess to me for I shall strive to hide your faults and cover them with some excuse wherefore confess for though it be a fault to steal yet it is a double fault to hide it with a Lye and by these crimes you do offend the Gods nor will their anger be remov'd unless you confess and ask pardon Lady Innocence Your Doctrine is very good and Application well applied had I been Guilty but being Innocent they are vainly uttered Lord de l'Amour I hope you will agree to resign the interest you have to me if I should desire you Lady Innocence Saints never offred up their Souls to God more willingly than I all interest to you not but that I love you yet I should be loath to be bound to one that hath so ill an opinion of me as you have Lord de l'Amour The World would condemn me if I should marry you to stain my Posterity with your Crimes Lady Innocence O Heavens is my scandal of so deep a dye as to stain Predecessors and Posterity yours may avoid it but my Predecessors are spotted all over She goes out weeping Lord de l'Amour I cannot chuse but love her although I fear she is guilty but I perceive she is resolv'd not to confess as being asham'd of it Ex. Scene 14. Enter the Lady Sanspareile in a bed as being sick the bed drawn on the stage and her Father kneels by the bed-side whilst she speaks as dying SAnspareile Let spotless Virgins bear me to my grave and holy Anthems sing before my Herse and soft-toucht Instruments to play the while and keep just time with tears that trickling fall from the sad eyes of my most sorrowful friends and one my Coffin spread upon a covering of smooth Sattin white to signify here how I lived a Virgin pure I lived and dyed and let my works which I have wrought and spun out of my brain be given to times Library to keep alive my name And set a Lilly-Garland on my Herse On every leaf therein stick on a verse And when my Coffin to the grave you bring Let Poets on my Herse some verses fling For whilst I liv'd I worship'd Nature great And Poets are by Nature favoured I in the Muses Arms desire to Dye For I was bred up in their Company And my request 's to them when I am dead I may amongst them be remembered But death drawes near my destiny is come Father farewell may time take up my years which death cuts off and add them to your life Peace keep your mind and Comfort give you rest He weeps But why do you weep dear Father my life 's not worth your tears yet Heavens doe weep and mingle with dull earth their Cristal streams and earth 's refresht thereby so is not death for death is ever dry Father O Child O Child my heart will break Sanspareile Sir why do you sigh and groan and grieve that I must dye life is perpetual and death is but a change of shape Only I wish that Death may order it so That from your rootes I may your flower grow I fear not Death nor am I loath to dye Yet I am loath to leave your Company But O the Muses stay my dying lips to close Farewel Dyes Her Father starts up from her Bed-side and stares about the Bed and the dead Lady is drawn off the stage Father What art thou sted dear Soul where dost thou goe stay and I will bear thee Company Stares about Where art thou Soul why mak'st thou such great haste I pray thee stay and take thy aged Fathers Soul along with thee left it should wander in the dark and gloomy
several way Also her life was like a Monarchy where Reason as sole King did govern al her actions which actions like as Loyal Subjects did obey those Laws which Reason decreed Also her life was like Ioves Mansions high as being placed above this worldly Globe from whence her Soul looked down on duller earth mixt not but viewed poor mortals here below thus was her life above the world because her life prized not the Trifles here Perchance this Noble Company will think I have said too much and vainly thus to speak That Fathers should not praise their Children so Because that from their Root and Stock did grow Why may not Roots boast if their Fruites be good As hindering worth in their own Flesh and blood Shall they dissemble to say they are naught Because they are their own sure that 's a fault Unpardonable as being a lye that 's told Detracting lyes the baser lyes I hold Neither can strangers tell their life and worth Nor such affections have to set them forth As Parents have or those that 's neer of Kin Virtuous Partiality sure that 's no sin And virtue though she be lovliest when undrest Yet she is pleas'd when well she is exprest But Oh! my words have spent my stock of breath And Life 's commanded forth by powerful Death When I am dead this company I pray The last rites done me by my daughter lay And as her soul did with the Muses flye To imitate her in her a verse I dye He falls back in his Chair and is dead Mr. Comfort Noble Friends you heard his request which was to be buryed in his daughters grave and whilst you show your charity in laying the Corps of his daughter in the grave I will carry out his body and put it into a Coffin and then lay him in the same grave The Company said Do so Goes out with the body The whilst the Virgins take up the Lady Sanspareiles Herse and whilst they are putting it into the grave this Song following was sung Tender Virgins as your Birth Put her gently in the earth What of Moral or Divine Here is lapt up in this shrine Rhetorick dumb Philosophy Both those arts with her did dye And grieved Poets cannot choose But lament for her their Muse When she was putting into the Grave this Song following was sung Her Tomb her Monument her Name Beyond an Epitaph her Fame Death be not proud imbracing more Now than in all thy reign before Boasting thy Triumphs since thou must But justly glory in her dust Let thy Dart rust and lay it by For after her none 's sit to dye After this her Peal is Rung on Lutes by Musicians And the Company goes out Scene 23. A Tomb is thrust on the Stage then the Lord de l'Amour enters LOrd de l'Amour Now I am free no hinderance to my own Tragedy He goeth to the Tomb This Tomb her sacred Body doth contain He draws his Sword then he kneels down by the Tomb and then prayes Dear Soul pardon my crimes to thee they were crimes of ignorance not malice Sweet gentle Spirits flye me not but stay And let my Spirits walk thy Spirits way You lov'd me once your Love in death renew And may our soules be as two Lovers true Our Blood 's the Bonds our wounds the Seals to Print Our new Contract and Death a witnesse in 't He takes his Sword Had I as many lives as Poors in skin He sacrifize them for my ignorant sin As he speaks he falls upon his Sword Enter his Friend Master Charity He seeing him lye all in blood almost dead runs to him and heaves him up Friend I did fear this which made me follow him but I am come too late to save his life O my Lord speak if you can Lord de l'Amour Friend lay me in this Tomb by my affianced Wife for though I did not usher her to the grave I will wait after her Dyes EPILOGUE Noble Spectators now you have seen this Play And heard it speak let 's hear what now you say But various judgements various sentences give Yet we do hope you 'l sentence it may live But not in Prison be condemn'd to lye Nor whipt with censure rather let it dye Here on this Stage and see the Funeral Rites Which is to put out all the Candle lights And in the grave of darknesse let it rest In peace and quiet and not molest The harmlesse soul which hopes Mercury may Unto the Elizium fields it safe convey But if you sentence life the Muses will Attend it up unto Parnassus Hill If so pray let your hands here in this place Clap it as an applause the triumph grace FINIS These Verses the Lord Marquesse writ This Song the Lord Marquesse writ This Song was writ by the Lord Marquesse This Song was writ by the Lord Marquesse of New-castle The first Part of the Lady Contemplation The Actors Names Lord Title Lord Courtship Sir Experience Traveller Sir Fancy Poet Sir Golden Riches Sir Effeminate Lovely Sir Vain Complement Sir Humphrey Interruption Mr. Adviser Doctor Practise and other Gentlemen Tom Purveyer Roger Farmer Old Humanity Servants and others The Lady Contemplation The Lady Conversation The Lady Visitant The Lady Ward The Lady Virtue Lady Amorous Mrs. Troublesome Mrs. Governesse the Lady Virtues Attendant Nurse Careful Nurse to Lady Ward Maudlin Huswife Roger Farmers wife Mall Mean-bred the daughter Nan Scape-all Maid to the Lady Virtue The first Part of the Lady Contemplation ACT I. Scene 1. Enter the Lady Contemplation and the Lady Visitant VIsitant What Lady Contemplation musing by your self alone Contemplation Lady Visitant I would you had been ten miles off rather than to have broken my Contemplation Visitant Why are you so godly to be so serious at your Devotion Contemplation No faith they were Contemplations that pleas'd me better than Devotion could have done for those that contemplate of Heaven must have death in their mind Visitant O no for there is no Death in Heaven to disturb the joyes thereof Contemp. But we must dye before we come to receive those joyes and the terrifying thoughts of Death take away the pleasing thoughts of Heaven Visitant Prethee let me know those pleasing thoughts Contemplation I did imagine my self such a Beauty as Nature never made the like both for Person Favour and Colour and a Wit answerable to my Beauty and my Breeding and Behaviour answerable to both my Wisdome excelling all And if I were not thus as I say yet that every one should think I were so for opinion creates more and perfecter Beauties than Nature doth And then that a great powerful Monarch such a one as Alexander or Caesar fell desperately in love with me seeing but my Picture which was sent all about the world yet my Picture I did imagine was to my disadvantage not flattering me any wayes yet this Prince to be inamoured with this shadow for the substance sake Then Love perswaded
Conver. T is true they did so in former times when the Crown kept up Ceremony and Ceremony the Crown but since that Ceremony is down their grandeur is lost and their splendor put out and no light thereof remains But they are covered with a dark rudenesse wherein the Clown justles the Lord and the Lord gives the way to the Clown the Man takes the wall of his Master and the Master scrapes legs with Cap in hand to the Servant and waits upon him not out of a generous and noble Nature but out of a base servile fear and through fear hath given the Power away Exper. Trav. I am sorry to hear the Nobility is so degenerated Ex. Scene 7. Enter the Lord Courtship and his Friend Master Adviser ADviser I wonder your Lordship should be so troubled at your Fathers commands which was to marry the Lady Ward unlesse she had been ill-favoured and old Lord Courtship O that 's the misery that she is so young For I had rather my Father had commanded me to marry one that had been very old than one that is so young for if she had been very old there might have been some hopes of her death but this young Filly will grow upon me not from me besides those that are young give me no delight their Company is dull Adviser VVhy she is not so very young she is fifteen years of Age Lord Court Give me a Lady to imbrace about the years of twenty rather than fifteen then is her Beauty like a full-blown Rose in Iune her VVit like fruit is ripe and sweet and pleasant to the ear when those of fifteen are like to green sharp Fruit not ripened by the Sun of Time Yet that 's not all that troubles me but I cannot endure to be bound in VVedlocks shackles for I love variety and hate to be ty'd to one Adviser VVhy you may have the more variety by marrying Lord Court No faith 't is a Bar for if I should but kisse my wives Maid which a thousand to one but I shall my wife if she doth not beat her Maid making a hideous noise with scoldings yet she will pour and cry and feign her self sick or else she would Cuckold me and then I am paid for all Adviser Faith my Lord it is a hundred to one but a man when he is maryed shall be Cuckolded were he as wife as Solomon as valiant as David as fortunate as Caesar as witty as Homer or as handsome as Absalom for Women are of the same Nature as men for not one man amongst a thousand makes a good Husband nor one woman amongst a thousand makes an honest Wife Lord Court No saith you might well have put another Cypher and made it ten thousand Adviser Well my Lord since you must marry pray let me counsel you This Lady Ward being very young you may have her bred to your own Humour Lord Court How is that Adviser VVhy accustome her to your wayes before you marry her let her see your several Courtships to several Mistresses and keep wenches in your house and when she is bred up to the acquaintance of your customes it will be as natural to her Lord Court VVhat to be a whore Adviser No to know your humours and to be contented thereat Lord Court VVell I will take your advice although it is dangerous And as the old saying is the Medicine may prove worse than the disease Adviser VVhy the worst come to the worst it is but parting Lord Court You say true but yet a divorce will not clearly take off the disgrace of a Cuckold Ex. Scene 8. Enter Poor Virtue and old Humanity HUmanity I have found out a service a Farmer which hath the report of an honest labouring man and his wife a good huswifely woman they have onely one daughter about your years a pretty Maid truely she is and seems a modest one but how you will endure such rough and rude work which perchance they will imploy you in I cannot tell I doubt you will tire in it Poor Virtue Do not fear for what I want in strength my industry shall supply Humanity But you must be fitted with cloaths according and proper to your service Poor Virtue That you must help me to Humanity That I will Ex. ACT III Scene 9. Enter Sir Fancy Poet and the Lady Contemplation SIr Fancy Poet Sweet Lady Contemplation although your thoughts be excellent yet there are fine curiosities and sweet pleasures to be enjoyed in the use of the world Contemplation Perchance so but would not you think that man a Fool that hath a great estate a large convenient house well situated in sweet and healthfull Aire pleasant and delightful having all about for the eyes to view Landskips and Prospects beside all the inside richly furnished and the Master plentifully served and much company to passe his time with as a resort of men of all Nations of all Ages of all qualities or degrees and professions of all humours of all breedings of all shapes of all complexions Likewise a recourse for all Wits for all Scholars for all Arts for all Sciences Also Lovers of all sorts Servants of all use and imployments Thus living luxuriously with all rarities and varieties and yet shall go a begging debasing himself with humble crouching inslaving himself to Obligations living upon cold Charity and is denyed often times unkindly or kickt out scornfully when he may be honoured at home and served in state would not you think that this man had an inbred basenesse that had rather serve unworthily than command honourably that had rather be inslaved than free Besides that mind is a fool that cannot entertain it self with it's own thoughts a wandring Vagabond that is never of seldome at home in Contemplation A Prodigal to cast out his thoughts vainly in idle words base to inslave it self to the Body which is full of corruption when it can create bodilesse Creatures like it self in Corporalities with which self Creatures it may nobly honestly freely and delightfully entertain it self VVith which the mind may not only delight it self but improve it self for the thoughts which are the actions of the mind make the soul more healthful and strong by exercises for the mind is the soules body and the thoughts are the actions thereof Fancy Poet After what manner will you form this Body Contempl. Thus Understanding is the Brain Reason the Liver Love is the heart Hate the Spleen Knowledge the Stomach Judgement the Sinews Opinions the Bones VVill the Veins Imaginations the Blood Fancy the Spirits the Thoughts are the Life and Motion or the Motions of the Life the outward Form is the Mind it self which sometimes is like a Beast sometimes like a Man and sometimes like a God Fancy Poet And you my fair Goddesse Ex. Scene 10. Enter the Lord Courtship and the Lady Amorous LAdy Amorous My Lord you are too covetous to take a wife meerly for her riches Lord Courtship Believe me Madam
Sleep two very good safe Doctors Pleasure Send Ease presently to fetch them bid her make haste Exeunt Enter the five Senses as being very sick yet Touch seems not so sick as melancholy They all pass silently over the Stage Enter Temperance and Madamoiselle Pleasure Pleasure Temperance are the Doctors come Temperance Yes and gone again Pleasure And what have they prescribed Temperance Abstinence Pleasure And will that cure them Temperance They say it will prove a perfect cure Probatum est Pleasure The next act I do shall be to turn away Wanton Idle Excess and Surfet Temperance You will hardly get them out of your Service although you should beat them out Exeunt ACT IV. Scene 27. Enter Madamoiselle Ambition and her Waiting-woman VVOman Madam me thinks Monsieur Vain-glorious is a very proper man and would be a fit Match for your Ladyship Ambition Let me tell you I will never marry a man whose Soul hath Vacuum but that man I would marry should have a soul filled with Natures best Extractions his Head the Cabinet of Natures wisest Counsels and curiousest Fancies his Heart the Treasury of Natures purest currentest and Heroick Virtue For if ever I marry I will have a Husband that is able to govern Kingdoms to Marshal Armies to Fight Battels and Conquer Nations and not a self-conceited Fool or fantastical Gallant such as speaks ranting Words wears slanting Cloaths walks with a proud Garb looks with a disdainful Countenance Courts Mistrisses loves Flatteries hates Superiors and scorns Inferiors keeps a greater Retinue than his Revenue will maintain who like moths eat through the cloth of his Estate and he like another fly plays so long in his Vain-glorious Flame until he is consumed therein spending with an open purse and prodigal vanity and yet receives with a covetous hand So Vanity flies and flutters about in the heat of Prosperity and dies in the Winter of Adversity No I will have a Husband if ever I have any whose Minde is settled like the Centre which can neither rise nor fall with good or bad Fortune and not a little Soul in a narrow Heart and witless Brain Exeunt Scene 28. Enter Monsieur Satyrical and another Gentleman GEntlem. Sir I desire you will pardon me but I am commanded to bring you here a Challenge Gives it Satyrical Are you the Second Sir Gentlem. No Sir He read Satyrical Are you a Pimp Sir Gentlem. I scorn your base words for I am a Gentleman Satyrical Many a Gentleman scorns base words but not base Actions Gentlem. I scorn both base words and base Actions Satyrical It doth not seem so by the Challenge you have brought Gentlem. Why what is the Challenge Satyrical The Challenge is from a Woman and I will read it to you He reads the Challenge Monsieur Satyrical I Challenge you and am resolv'd to fight Not in the Field of Mars as Champion Knight Nor in the Court of Venus will I be But to the Lists of Mercury Challenge thee Where all the Muses will Spectators sit To Iudge which is the great'st Victor of Wit The Weapons which we fight with must be Words For I a woman am not us'd to Swords Custome and Education leaves us bare To Natures Arms the Arms of Death we fear Your Servant Bon' Esprit Satyrical These two last Lines make you a Pimp Sir Gentlem. I must be contended for there is no Revenge to be taken against Ladies But Mother Matron had been a more properer Messenger than I for this Challenge Satyrical I shall send my Answer by a more inferiour person than you are and so shall take my leave for this time Gentlem. Your Servant Exeunt Scene 29. Enter Madamoiselle Bon' Esprit Portrait Faction Ambition Superbe FAction All Poets and Musicians are mad more or less for Madness is caused by a distemper of the Brain like as the Pulse which beats quicker than the natural motion Bon' Esprit You mistake madness for madness is not caused by the quickness of motion but by the irregularity of the motion And as for Poetical and Musical Motions although they are quick yet they keep Time Time and Order when those Motions that cause madness do not But the quick-moving brains of Poets are caused by their lively elevated Spirits which are Active and Industrious always creating for delight or profit as Verses Fancies Scenes Sonnets or inventing Arts And if you account these Ingenious and Divine Spirits to be mad I shall desire to be mad too as they are Faction But some Spirits are so quick that they out run all Invention Bon' Esprit Those are neither the spirits of Poets nor Musicians not but that Poets and Musicians may be mad as other men but their madness is not caused by the Poetical and Harmonical spirits but some other defects of the brain or distemper of the spirits but there are many mad that are so far from Poetical Fancies or Musical skill or Inventions as they can neither conceive the one or learn the other or understand either but Musick and Poetry have oft-times cured madness and certainly are the best and most excellent Physicians for that disease For though madness is but one and the same disease as madness yet the Causes and Effects are divers Superbe A Feaver in the Brain causeth madness Bon' Esprit It rather causeth madness to have outragion Effects but a cold brain may be mad But it is neither heat nor cold that causeth madness but the irregularity of the Spirits Ambition But heat and cold may cause the irregularity of the Spirits for as cold Livers make the Veins like standing ponds which putrifies the blood for want of motion so very cold Brains may be like Snow or Ice to obstruct or bind the Spirits hindring the regular motions Bon' Esprit You say right and that is a stupid madness And as a hot Liver may boyl and inflame the blood so hot Brains may inflame the Spirits causing Combustious Motions as Thundring which is a raging madnesse Enter Monsieur Censurer Censure Who is raging-mad Faction A despairing Lover Censure Hang him in his Mistris Frowns or strangle him in the Cords of her Cruelty Superbe Would you be served so Censure Yes when I am a mad Lover For I had rather die than be in love with a hard-hearted Mistris for of the two I had rather imbrace death than Court her in which Courtship I should be Transform'd or Metamorphos'd into many several things As I should be a River of Lovers Tears a Ventidock of Lovers Sighs an Aquaduct of Lovers Griefs and a Chilling grotto of Lovers Fears and rather than I would endure these Transformations I would be well contended to be annihilated Ambition O fie had you rather be nothing than a Lover Censure I had rather be nothing than a thing worse than nothing Faction Well I hope to see you a desperate Lover at one time or other Censure I hope not for I have no cause to fear for my Mind
marry me Portrait If it be a Charity to you it would be none to my self but the contrary I should prove cruel to my self in making my life unhappy Sensuality Yet it will be a meritorious Act for what is more meritorious than to save a soul Portrait So I shall rob Pluto of his due and just right Sensuality He will never miss his loss for on my Conscience he is not so good an Arithmetician as he could count and number the Millions of souls he hath in Hell or those he hath right to nay if he had the skill of Utlick he could not number them for they surmount all Accounts Portrait But the torments he puts souls to will find them out Sensuality It is a question whether souls are capable of torments but howsoever to put it out of question pray marry me for I am become of a sudden very consentious Portrait But there will be another question which is Whether Mariage will save you or not Sensuality O yes for the Purgatory of Mariage doth purifie Souls and make them fit for Heaven Portrait But I fear if I should marry you I should do like those that strive to save a drowning man so I indeavouring to save you should lose my self Sensuality There is no Honourable Act without some danger to the Actor Portrait But all wise Actions have security Sensuality There is no security in Nature Portrait I will consider although after a wise consideration I do a foolish action as most considerers do Exeunt ACT V. Scene 22. Enter Monsieur Heroick and Madamoiselle Ambition HEroick Madam I hear I live in your good Opinion Ambition Your merits do Heroick I hope if you do esteem my merits if I have merits to be esteem'd you will not despise my Person nor deny my Sute Ambition I esteem of your person for your merits sake and those that have merits and are worthy will make no ignoble Sute wherefore I may grant it before I know it Heroick My Sute is to accept of me for your Husband Ambition I shall not deny to be your Wife Enter as to these Couple all the Cabal as Pleasure Portrait Faction Superbe Bon' Esprit Temperance Matron Wanton Excess Ease Tranquillitous Peace Vain-glorious Censure Satyrical Frisk Sensuality Busie Inquisitive Liberty Tranquill Well met Monsieur Heroical and Madamoiselle Ambition Inquisitive Now we are all met how shall we pass the time away Pleasure Nay rather how shall we recreate our time Vain-glor. Let us sit and declare what we love or hate All speak Agreed Superbe Shall we declare our love or our hate first Censure Our love first Heroick Nay faith let love close up our discourse Ambition Then let hate be the Gentleman-Usher Bon' Esprit She will usher you into foul ways Sensuality Let her usher us into as foul ways as she will we will follow her All speak Begin begin Superbe I hate poverty for that dejects the Spirits and oppresseth the Life Satyrical I hate falshood for that deceives my Reason and blind-folds my Senses Bon' Esprit I hate a fool because he obstructs my Understanding and sets my Brain on the Rack Tranquill I hate noise because it disturbs my thoughts hurts my hearing and buries sense reason and auricular words Pleasure I hate sickness because it is a friend to Death Vain-glor. I hate vain follies because they bring neither content pleasure nor profit Ambition I hate a Court because it puts Modesty out of countenance Patience out of humour and Merit out of favour Heroick I hate a slavish Peace because there is no imployment for noble active spirits Excess I hate truth because it tells me my faults Busie I hate truth because it hinders my search thereof Ease I hate motion because therein there is no rest Inquisitive I hate rest because it makes no Inquiries Temperance I hate life because therein is more pain and trouble than pleasure or peace Liberty I hate restraint because it inslaves life Wanton I hate a Nunnery because it doth not only restrain but bar our Sex from the sight of men Temperance Thou lovest men well that their very sight delights thee Censure I hate light because it discovers Lovers Faction I hate darkness because it conceals Adulteries Sensuality I hate a chaste Beauty because she quenches my hopes and inflames my desires Portrait I hate Madamoiselle la Belle because Monsieur Sensuality did like her Frisk I hate Age for that vades Beauty and banishes Lovers Matron No more of Age and Hate take Love without Beauty Bon' Esprit Mother Matron would have you take her Frisk Nay faith we will leave Mother Matron and begin with Love Inquisitive I love plenty for in plenty lives happiness Wanton I love freedom for in freedom lives pleasure Temperance By your favour Plenty may want happiness and Freedom pleasure Sensuality I love to go to Church Temperance What to hear a Sermon Sensuality No to meet a Mistris Temperance Out upon thee thou Reprobate would you make a Church a Bawdy-house Sensuality No I would make that place where Beauties were a Church and the fairest should be the Godess I would pray to Temperance There are not any that are fair will hear you Sensuality And those that are foul I will not pray to Censure Follow Love for that makes all things fair and pleasing Ease I love silence for in silence my life lives easily my thoughts freely and my mind harmoniously Temperance Sometimes the thoughts disturb the mind and so the life more than noise disturbs the thoughts Vain-glor. I love Honour for in Honour lives Respect Portrait I love Beauty for in Beauty lives admiration Heroick I love Fame for in Fame lives the memory of the best of my Actions Ambition I love power for in power lives Adorations Satyrical I love Wit for that delights my self and recreates my friends Bon' Esprit I love Eloquence for that delights my Ear Temperance But Eloquence will deceive your Judgment delude your Understanding and flatter your Passions with insinuating perswasions and will draw you into an Erroneous Belief and by that unto unjust actions Sensuality I love Madamoiselle Portrait Portrait I love Monsieur Sensuality Heroick I love Madamoiselle Ambition Ambition I love Monsieur Heroick Satyrical I love Madamoiselle Bon' Esprit Bon' Esprit I love Monsieur Satyrical Vain-glor. I love Madamoiselle Superbe Superbe I love Monsieur Vain-glorious Tranquill I love Madamoiselle Pleasure Pleasure I love Monsieur Tranquillitous Peace Censure I love Madamoiselle Faction Faction I love Monsieur Censure Busie I love ma filia Excess Excess I love Monsieur Busie Liberty I love ma filia Wanton Wanton I love Monsieur Liberty Ease I love a single life for in Mariage lives too much trouble to live in Ease Temperance I love to continue a Widow for Temperance is banish'd from most places and persons Matron I love Monsieur Frisk but Monsieur Frisk loves not me Censure Faith I 'll perswade him to love if
light from the Sun or the World from its Center or the fix'd Stars from their assigned places than draw away love from him Sensible Why how if he will not have you Amor I can only say I shall be unhappy Sensible I hope you will be wiser than to make your self miserable for one you cannot have to be your Husband Exeunt Scene 27. Enter many of Monsieur Malateste's Servants writing against their Master and Ladies comming home Enter Monsieur Malateste and his Lady SErvants Heaven give your Worship joy and our noble Lady Madam Mal. What is this your best House Monsieur Mal. Yes and is it not a good one Sweet Madam Mal. Fie upon it I hate such an old-fashiond House wherefore pray pull it down and build another more fashionable as that there may be a Bell-view and Pergalus round the outside of the Horse also Arched Gates Pillars and Pilasters and carved Frontispeeces with Antick Imagery also I would have all the lower rooms vaulted and the upper rooms flat-roof'd painted and gilded and the Planchers checker'd and inlaid with silver the Stair-case to be large and winding the steps broad and low as shallow then to take in two or three Fields about your House to make large Gardens wherein you may plant Groves of Mirtle as also to make Walks of green Turf and those to be hanging and shelving as if they hung by Geometry also Fountains and Water-works and those Water-works to imitate those Birds in Winter that only sing in Summer Monsieur Mal. But this will cost a great summ of money Wise Madam Mal. That 's true Husband but to what use is money unless to spend Monsieur Mal. But it ought to be spent prudently Madam Mal. Prudently say you why Prudence and Temperance are the Executioners of Pleasure and Murtherers of Delight wherefore I hate them as also this covetous humour of yours Exeunt Monsieur Malateste and his Wife 1 Servant I marry Sir here is a Lady indeed for she talks of pulling down this House before she hath throughly seen it and of building up another 2 Servant If you will have my opinion the old servants must go down as well as the old house 3 Servant I believe so for she look'd very scornfully upon us nor spoke not one word either good or bad to us 4 Servant Well come let us go about our imployments and please as long as we can and when we can please no longer we must seek other Services Exeunt Scene 28. Enter Monsieur Frere and Madam Soeur MAdam Soeur Do not pursue such horrid Acts as to Whore your Sister Cuckold your Brother-in-Law dishonour your Father and brand your life and memory with black infamy Good Brother consider what a world of misery you strive to bring upon your self and me Frere Dear Sister pity me and let a Brothers pleading move your heart and bury not my youth in Death before the natural time Soeur 'T is better you should die and in the grave be laid than live to damn your soul Frere To kill my self will be as bad a crime Soeur O no for Death any way is more honourable than such a life as you would live Exeunt Scene 29. Enter the two Gentlemen 1 Gent. FRiend prethee tell me why you do not marry 2 Gent. Because I can find no woman so exact as I would have a Wife to be for first I would not have a very tall woman for the appears as if her soul and body were mis-match'd as to have a pigmy soul and a gyantly body 1 Gent. Perchance her soul is answerable to her body 2 Gent. O no for it is a question whether women have souls or no but for certain if they have they are of a dwarfish kind Neither would I have a wife with a masculine strength for it seems praeposterous to the softness and tenderness of their Sex neither would I have lean wife for she will appear always to me like the picture of Death had she but a sythe and hour-glass in her hand for though we are taught to have always Death in our Mind to remember our End yet I would not have Death always before my Eyes to be afraid of my End But to have a very lean wife were to have Death in my Arms as much as in my Eyes and my Bed would be as my Grave 1 Gent. Your Bed would be a warm Grave 2 Gent. Why man though Death is cold the Grave is hot for the Earth hath heat though Death hath none 1 Gent. What say you to a fat woman 2 Gent. I say a fat woman is a bed-fellow only for the Winter and not for the Summer and I would have such a woman for my Wife as might be a nightly companion all the year 1 Gent. I hope you would not make your Wife such a constant bed-fellow as to lie always together in one bed 2 Gent. Why not 1 Gent. Because a mans stomack or belly may ake which will make wind work and the rumbling wind may decrease love and so your wife may dislike you and dislike in time may make a Cuckold 2 Gent. By your favour it increases Matrimonial Love 't is true it may decrease Amorous Love and the more Amorous Love increases the more danger a man is in for Amorous Love even to Husbands is dangerous for that kind of Love takes delight to progress about when Matrimonial Love is constant and considers Nature as it is Besides a good Wife will not dislike that in her Husband which she is subject to her self but howsoever I will never marry unless I can get such a Wife as is attended by Virtue directed by Truth instructed by Age on honest grounds and honourable principles which Wife will neither dislike me nor I her but the more we are together the better we shall love and live as a maried pair ought to live and not as dissembling Lovers as most maried couples do 1 Gentlem. What think you of choosing a Wife amongst the Sociable Virgins 2 Gent. No no I will choose none of them for they are too full of discourse for I would have a Wife rather to have a listning Ear than a talking Tongue for by the Ear she may receive wise instructions and so learn to practise that which is noble and good also to know my desires as to obey my will when by speaking muck she may express her self a fool for great Talkers are not the wisest Practisers Besides her restless Tongue will disturb my Contemplations the Tranquillity of my Mind and the peace quiet and rest of my Life Exeunt Scene 30. Enter Madam Malateste and another Maid and Nan the former Ladies Maid MAdam Mal. Are you she that takes upon you to govern and to be Mistris in this House Nan Why I do but that I did in the other Ladies time Madam Mal. Let me tell you you shall not do so in my time nay you shall have no doings wherefore get you out of the
home but I will go to bed for I am not very well 1 Servant You do not look well Sir Malateste Indeed I am sick Exeunt Scene 42. Enter Madam Soeur and Monsieur Frere MAdam Soeur Lord Brother what is the reason you are come back so soon Hath not your Barb run the Race Frere No Soeur What makes you here then Frere To see you Soeur To see me why I shall give you no thanks because you left my Husband behind you Frere I do not come for your thanks I come to please my self Soeur Prethee Brother get thee gone for thy face doth not appear so honest as it uses to do Frere I do not know how my Face doth appear but my Heart is as it was your faithful Lover Soeur Heaven forbid you should relapse into your old disease Frere Let me tell you Sister I am as I was and was as I am that is from the first time I saw you since I came from Travel I have been in love with you and must enjoy you and if you will imbrace my love with a free consent so if not I 'll force you to it Soeur Heaven will never suffer it but cleave the Earth and swallow you alive Frere I care not so you be in my Arms but I will first try Heavens power and struggle with the Deities He takes her in his arms and carries her out she cries help help murther murther Exeunt Scene 43. Enter Monsieur Malateste as being not well and his Wife Madam Malateste MOnsieur Mal. Wife Is this the way to cure melancholy to sit up all night at Cards and to lose five hundred pounds at a sitting or to stay all night abroad a Dancing and Revelling Madam O yes for the Doctors say there is nothing better than good company to imploy the Thoughts with outward Objects otherwise the Thoughts feed too much upon the Body besides they say that Exercise is excellent good to open Obstructions and to disperse melancholy Vapour and the Doctors say there is no Exercise better than Dancing because there are a great Company meet together which adds Pleasure to the Labour Monsieur My other Wife did not do thus Madam Wherefore she died in her youth with melancholy but I mean to live while I am old if mirth and good company will keep me alive and know I am not so kind-hearted to kill my self to spare your Purse or to please your Humour The Lady goes out and he goes out after sighing Scene 44. Enter Madam Soeur alone as ravished Soeur Who will call unto the Gods for aid since they assist not Innocency nor give protection to a Virtuous Life Is Piety of no use or is Heaven so obdurate no holy prayers can enter Heaven-gates or penitential tears can move the Gods to pity But O my sorrows are too big for words and all actions too little for his punishment Enter Monsieur Frere all unbutton'd and his sword drawn in his hand Frere Sister I must die wherefore you must not live for I cannot be without your company although in death and in the silent grave where no Love 's made nor Passion known Soeur It 's welcom News for if death comes not by your hand my hand shall give a passage unto life Frere There is none so sit to act that part as I who am so full of sin want nothing now but murther to make up measure He wounds her to death Soeur Death thou are my griefs Reprieve and wilt unlade my Soul from heavy thoughts that miserable life throws on and sinks me to the Earth Brother farewel may all your crimes be buried in my grave and may my shame and yours be never known Oh Oh dies Frere Now she is dead my Mind is at rest since I know none can enjoy her after me but I will follow thee I come my Mistris Wife and Sister all in one Monsieur Frere falls upon the point of his sword then falls clos'd by Madam Soeur and lays his Arm over her then speaks You Gods of Love if any Gods there be O hear my prayer And as we came both from one Womb so joyn our Souls in the Elizium out Bodies in one Tomb Oh oh oh dies Scene 45. Enter Monsieur Malateste upon a Couch as sick of a Consumption his Friend Monsieur Fefy sitting by him Then enters Madam Malateste to her sick Husband MOnsieur Mal. Wife you are very unkind that you will not come to see me now I am sick nor so much as send to know how I do Madam I am loth to trouble you with unnecessary visits or impertinent questions Monsieur Is it unnecessary or impertinent to see a Husband when he is sick or to ask how he doth Madam Yes when their visits and questions can do them no good But God be with you for I must be gone Monsieur What already Madam Yes for I doubt I have staid too long for I have appointed a meeting and it will be a dishonour for me to break my word Fefy But it will be more dishonour to be dancing when your Husband is dying Lady Madam What will you teach me go tutor Girls and Boys and not me Monsieur Let her go friend for her anger will disturb me Exit Lady Fefy I know not what her anger doth you but her neglect of you doth disturb me And for my part I wonder how you can suffer her Malateste Alas how shall I help or remedy it But Heaven is just and punishes me for the neglect I used towards my first Wife who was virtuous and kind Fefy She was a sweet Lady indeed Malateste O she was But I Devil as I was to use her as I did making her a slave unto my whore and frowns conjecturing all her Virtues to a contrary sense for I mistook her patience for simplicity her kindness for wantonness her thrist for covetousness her obedience for flattery her retir'd life for dull stupidity and what with the grief to think how ill I used her and grieving to see how ill this Wife uses me wasting my Honour and Estate she hath brought me into a Consumption as you see But when I am dead as I cannot live long I desire you who are my Executor to let me buried in the same Tomb wherein my Wife is laid for it is a joy to me to think my dust shall be mixt with her pure ashes for I had rather be in the grave with my first Wife than live in a Throne with my second But I grow very sick even to death wherefore let me be removed Exeunt Scene 46. Enter Monsieur Pere and his Son-in-law Monsieur Marry MOnsieur Pere Son-in-law did your Brother say he was very ill Marry He said he had such a pain on his left side as he could not sit on his horse but must be forced to return home again Pere Heaven bless him for my heart is so full of fears and doubts as if it did Prognosticate some great
saying is Confidence makes Cuckolds Chastity Your confidence of me shall never harm you Sage But your too serious studies will harm your health and if you be sick I cannot be well besides it will decay your Beauty waste your Youth like Oyl spent in a melancholy Lamp where Life is always blinking Chastity It were better that my Body should be sick than my Mind idle my Beauty decay than my Understanding perish my Youth waste than my Fame lost my Life blinking than my Honour sinking for an idle Mind not well imploy'd creates a restless body which runs from place to place and hates to be at home Thus Mind and Body both being out extravagant Words and Actions run about and Riot keeps possession And though the Beauty withers and decays Yet Wit and Wisedome with the ruine stays And if the Youth doth waste and Life's Oyl 's spent Yet Fame lasts long and builds a Monument A melancholy life doth shadows cast But sets forth Virtue if they are well plac'd Then who would entertain an idle Mirth Begot by Vanity and dies in scorn Or proud or pleas'd with Beauty when the Birth Becomes the Grave or Tomb as soon as born But Wisedome wishes to be old and glad When youthful Follies die which seem as mad If Age is subject to repent what 's past Prudence and Experience redeems what 's lost Sage I perceive Wife the Muses have kept you company although you walk by your self but now I desire you will leave their company for a time and entertain mine Chastity VVith all my heart but the Muses are never with me but when you are imploy'd about serious Affairs for though they are my Visitors yet they are your Domestick Servants Exeunt Scene 24. Enter Sir Humphrey Disagree and his Wife the Lady Disagree LAdy Disagree Dear Husband where have you been Sir Hum. Disagree My dear kind VVife I have been in the Garden where I have heard little Robin Red-breast sing Lady Disagree That 's a sign Sweet-heart we shall have warm weather otherwise they would come into the House Sir Hum. Disag. I had rather believe my pretty Bird we shall have cold weather for they sing always in the coldest time of the year as in the depth of Winter Lady Disagree How ignorantly you speak good Husband as if the Robin Redbreast sings onely in the cold Winter and not in the warm Summer as well Sir Hum. Disagree Why not good VVife as well as Nightingals which only sing in the Spring and Swallows in the heat of Summer Lady Disagree That doth not prove that the Robbin doth not sing in Summer Sir Hum. Disag. I never heard the Robbin sing in Summer Lady Disagree Your never hearing of it is not a sufficient proof Sir Hum. Disag. It is to me Lady Disagree To say it is without a Reason proves a Fool Sir Hum. Disag. I only prov'd my self a Fool in marying you Lady Disagree I was accurst when first I gave consent to be your Wife Sir Hum. Disag. You were easily won Lady Disagree What because I consented to a Knave that wooed Sir Hum. Disag. You are a false woman for calling me a Knave Lady Disagree You are a Cuckold for calling me false Sir Hum. Disag. Am I so Mistris I will be sure to thrust my Horns thorough your Heart He offers to strike her she gets up a stool and slings at him he gets a cushion and slings at her and then gets hold of her she cries out Murder in comes their friends and servants and parts them Sir Hum. Disag. Dam me I 'll kill her Lady Disagree You 'l be hang'd will you Friend Nay good Sir be not angry Servant Good Madam go away until my Masters anger is pass'd over Exeunt ACT III Scene 25. Enter Sir Francis Inconstant alone as being very melancholy INconstant I will read this Letter once again although it shakes my Soul and makes me almost mad He reads aloud the Letter Sir THe wrongs you have done me are more than Heaven can give me patience to endure for which wrongs may thick black clouds of Infamy overspread your Memory and may my Sorrows beat upon your Soul as Northern Winds upon the Sea and raise up all your thoughts in discontent as raging billows causing your voice to roar out loud with hideous noise confounding all the Actions of your Life and way your hopes be drown'd in the salt water of despairing Tears The Heavens cannot condemn me for cursing a man which hath betray'd my Youth by Flattery violated my Chastity by Protestations tormented my harmless thoughts with Perjury disquieting my peaceable Life with Misfortunes But the burthen of my wrongs being too weighty for life to bear hath sunk it to the Grave where I hope all my disgrace will be buried with me though not the revenges of my Wrongs for those will punish you when I am dead For the Gods are just although Mankind is not Enter Nic Adviser Sir Francis Inconstants man Inconstant O Nick what a Villain am I Adviser For what Sir Inconstant For Perjury and Murther for I did not only break those Bonds I had sealed with holy Vows but my Falshood hath kill'd a fair young Lady for she hearing I had forsaken her and was to be maried to another she dy'd for grief Adviser Alas Sir we are all by Nature both frail and mortal wherefore we must complain of Nature of her Inconstancy and Cruelty in making our Minds so changeable and our Bodies so weak the one being subject to Death the other subject to Variety But Sir in my Opinion you have no cause to grieve but rather to rejoyce for what you have erred by Nature you have repaired by Fortunes favour for if that Lady which is dead had lived you would have been incumber'd with many troubles Inconstant As how Nick Adviser Why you would have been as a young Bear baired by two young Whelps the forsaken Lady railing and exclaming against you in all Company she came into and your Wife tormenting you with sharp words and loud noise insomuch as you would have neither ear drank or slept in quiet Thus both abroad and at home you would have heard nothing but your own reproaches Inconstant But shall not I be the same now she is dead think you Adviser No faith Sir for Death hath stopt the mouth of the one and Kisses may chance to muzzle the mouth of the other but if you be melancholy your Lady will think you do repent and will believe that you do prefer the memory of your dead Mistris before the enjoyment of your living Wife besides women are so jealous as they will not allow their Husbands to think that makes them talk so much as they do for they think Thoughts are Bauds to Adulterous Actions and that Imaginations commit Fornication with the Ghosts and Spirits of the dead Inconstant Well Nick I will take thy counsel and cast off melancholy and be merry in Jovial Company Exeunt Scene
service to you Sir Cuckold Sir I am your most humble Servant and shall strive by all the ways I can to appear worthy your favours The Ladies speak familiarly Wanton Lord Lady Procurer how are you drest to day in a most careless fashion Procurer It is the mode it is the mode to go undrest Cuckold Wife this is not a fit room to entertain this noble Gentleman Sir will you be pleas'd to walk into another room Amorous All rooms are fine Sir where you and your Virtuous Lady are Exeunt Sir Thomas Cuckold and Monsieur Amorous Procurer 'Faith if I had not come running in before your Husband he had catch'd you Lady Wanton claps the Lady Procurer on the cloaths VVanton 'Faith Procurer thou art such another Lady-wag as all the Town cannot match thee Procurer I was I was but now I am grown old I am grown old but I was born to do good Offices Exeunt Scene 34. Enter two Maids of the Lady Poverty 's 1 MAid I wonder my Lady is able to stay in the room with my Master his vomiting hath so fumed the room as there is such a stink that by my troth I am almost strangled with the smell of the corrupted drink 2 Maid Alas poor Lady she is forc'd to stay for fear he should be outragious in his drunken humour for if she stirs or speaks he swears as if he would draw the Devils out of Hell 1 Maid Hell is not so bad as to be where he is now he is drunk Enter another Maid 3 Maid My Master is asleep and my Lady would have you make lesse noise and not to talk so loud for fear you should awake him 1 Maid If he be asleep we may make what noise we will or can make he will not wake until such time as the fume or vapour of wine be out of his head no sound can enter But I wonder my Lady will take such care of him when he hath no respect to her but transforms himself from man to beast every day indeed she sees him only a beast not a man for before he is wholy sober he rises to go to a Tavern to be drunk again 2 Maid If my Master transforms himself into a beast ere that he comes to my Lady he imitates Iove for he transform'd himself into a Bull for the sake of fair Europa 1 Maid But not into a drunken roaring Bull as my Master is 3 Maid 'Faith if I were my Lady I would hold by his Horns and then let him roar and drink and whore as much as he will 1 Maid Yes so she might chance to be drench'd in a Bathing-tub as Europa in the Sea Exeunt Scene 35. Enter Nan the Lady Jealousies Chamber-maid and her Master Sir Henry Courtly meets her and kisses her Enter the Lady Jealousie and sees him LAdy Iealousie So Husband I perceive Nan is in your favour Nan runs out of the room Courtly 'Faith Wife Nan is a careful and industrious Wench for she strives to serve us both for she makes you candles and feeds me with kisses Lady Iealousie Or rather Husband you feed Nan and Nan feeds me Courtly Faith the truth is I need you both Lady Iealousie But Nan hath the greatest share that makes her so proud and I so sickly But since you are so liberal to her and so sparing to me I will board elsewhere and so as I may carve where I like best Courtly Sure Wife you will not Lady Iealousie Surely Husband I will do my endeavour Courtly What to be a Whore Lady Iealousie Yes if being a whore will make you a Cuckold Exeunt Scene 36. Enter the Lady Hypocondria and her Maid LAdy Hypocondria My Husband hath been a long time abroad pray Iove he be safe if he should chance to have a quarrel and fight a hundred to one but he is killd for otherwise he would have come home do you think he is well Ioan Maid You need not fear for my master is of so civil a behaviour and of so sweet a disposition as he can have no enemies Lady Hypocon. O But he is a man that is very valiant and one that is very sensible of disgrace and affronts Maid Truly I believe you have no reason to fear Lady Hypocon. Do you but believe so nay then you doubt and therefore I know he is kill'd and I will go and find out the murtherer and kill him my self The Lady Hypocondria offers to run out of the room as in a frighted passion the maid stops her Maid My Noble Lady do not run in this passion for all the idle men and women and boyes and girles will run after you as thinking you mad for they make no difference betwixt melancholy and madnesse Lady Hypocon. I am not able to overcome this fear I shall die Maid Pray stay and send out one of our men to inquire where he is Lady Hypocon. Call Roger Trusty The Maid goes out The Lady alone Lady Hypocon. O You defendant Gods assist my Husband Enter Joan and Roger Trusty Lady Hypocon. Trusty go presently and seek out your master and bring me word where he is and how he doth and be sure if you see a grim look't fellow near him that you stir not from your Master but wait upon him home for fear some trechery should beset him Trusty Who shall bring you word of his health or sicknesse life or death Lady Hypocon. Death do you say O you have heard he is kill'd Trusty By Pluto I have heard no such thing Lady Hypocon. Why do you talk of death then Trusty Because you send me to know whether he be dead or alive Lady Hypocon. That is true wherefore let one of the Foot-boyes go along with you to bring me an answer but be sure you stay with your Master Trusty I shall Lady Hypocon. Make all the haste you can to find him Exeunt Scene 37. Enter Sir Henry Sage and the Lady Chastity SIr Hen. Sage Is the Lady Procurer a Baud say you Lady Chastity A perfect one I think for she pleaded as earnestly as Lawyers for a fee Sir Hen. Sage No doubt but she hath as much reason for sure she doth it for gain not out of love to wicked basenesse but I believe poverty perswades her or rather inforces her Chastity No surely it is an inborn or at least an inbred baseness for neither death nor torments can inforce nor riches nor preferrments allure a noble mind to such base acts but some are so unworthy or rather wicked as to delight to intice and to pervert all they can get acquaintance with Sir Hen. Sage And some doe it to hide their own faults thinking to bury them under the vices of others or smother them in the presse of a multitude but let me advise you not to entertain her company any more Chastity I believe she will not visit me again Exeunt Scene 38. Enter the Lady Sprightly and one of her women LAdy Sprightly Lord Lord this nasty
Lovewel Rogue that he was that he was that told her who was it Roger Trusty It was I Sir when I went to fetch your Leaguer-cloak to keep you warm Lovewel Villain I 'll run you through Trusty What you please Sir but my Lady takes it very patiently for when she heard of it she was playing on the Lute and did not leave playing at the report Lovewel I am glad she is so discreet Trusty Truly Sir I think my Lady is now one of the wisest and discreetest Ladies in the Town Lovewel What for playing on the Lute Trusty No Sir but for being so patient and temperate as all wise persons are who bear afflictions with that Moral Philosophical Carelesness and as they call it passive Courage composing their Faces into a Grave surly Countenance fashioning their Behaviour with Formality walking with a slow and stately Pace speaking nothing but Wise Sentences and Learned Morals Lovewel You are a moral Ass and although my wounds are but small yet I grow faint with standing to hear a fool talk Exeunt Scene 21. Enter the Lady Inconstant and Monsieur Disguise LAdy Inconst. Sir I believe you may wonder and think it strange that a woman can love a stranger so soon and so much Disguise I doe not think it strange in Nature but I think it strange you should affect me a person which is no way worthy of your Favour and your Love unless you like a Deity humbly descend to mortals accepting of their Adorations and Offerings And as a mortal to a Deity I offer up my Heart on the Altar of your Obligations Inconstant Here I do vow to Venus not only to offer you my person and all delights that it can yield but I offer you my Honour my Fathers Honour my Husbands Honour nay their lives if you require it Disguise I must confess your Husbands life is dangerous for we cannot well enjoy our loves with safety if that your Husband lives Inconstant Name but the way unto his Death and I will execute it Disguise I cannot for you must do it as you find Fortune gives you opportunity Inconstant Farewel and believe I shall let no opportunity slip that might bring my designs to pass The Lady Inconstant goes out Monsieur Disguise alone Disguise My revenge is too big for words all actions to little for his punishment wherefore you furies I invoke you to assist me and if Hell gives me not help Heaven or Death give me ease Exit Scene 22. Enter the Lady Procurer and Monsieur Amorous LAdy Procurer Now Monsieur Amorous you and the Lady Wanton shall not need to make so many excuses to meet for your going into the Country with Sir Thomas Cuckold you will be always in the House with his Lady Amorous Faith I have a great deal of business in the City which may suffer if I should go out of the Town Procurer Out upon you make excuses already Amorous I do not make excuses I only tell you the truth of my affairs Procurer Can you have any affairs greater or of more concernment than waiting on a Mistriss and such a Mistriss as you were a dying for to enjoy but a little time since well go thy ways Monsieur Amorous for thou art like a woman that hath fits of the Mother often swouning and sick but never dyes in any of them Amorous The Lady Chastity would be like a draught of cold water to bring me to life again Procurer Let me tell thee as those fits will never kill thee so all the Chastity in the Town can never cure thee Exeunt Scene 23. Enter the Lady Hypocondria and Joan her Maid LAdy Hypocondria Pray Iuno my Husband doth not perceive I have cry'd Ioan. You need not fear it for the hot Cloath you laid to your eyes hath sok'd out the redness and abated the swelling thereof but I doubt you will cry when you see him Hypocondria I hope I shall be wiser than to cry for I would not have my Husband think me a Fool or troublesome for the world Ioan. But surely Madam you must needs torment your Soul to strive so much against nature Hypocondria Love had rather torment it self then torment what it loves Ioan. Your Ladyship will make the old Proverb good which sayes love overcomes all things and surely it overcomes all when it overcomes nature it self Exeunt Scene 24. Enter the Lady Jealousy and the Fool LAdy Iealousy Prethy Fool watch thy Master and my Maid Nan and when they are together give notice and I will give thee a new Coat Fool. I shall stand Sentinel and give the watch-word The Lady Jealousy goes out The Fool alone Fool. Most Creatures their tails lyes in their heads or their heads lyes in their Neighbours tayles nose to breech for they are always thinking thereof which makes their thoughts as sluts and slovens their brains like to a heapt-up Dunghil but I must watch my Master and his Maid to catch Exeunt Scene 25. Enter Master Makepeace and Master Perswader friend and Chaplain to Sir Humphrey Disagree MAster Makepeace 'T is strange that Sir Humphrey Disagree and his Lady cannot agree yet they are both of good natures and generous Souls keep a noble House and are bountifull to their Servants kind and courteous to their Friends and he a very understanding Gentleman and a learned Scholar and an honest Man Perswader And she is a very Chast Lady a good Huswife and very orderly in her House as concerning what she is to take care of or to direct and is very pious and devout and yet both to be so indiscreet as to fall out about light toys and frivolous matters Makepeace 'T is strange and truly great pitty wherefore we ought to do our indeavour to try if we can make them friends Perswader Surely that might be easily done for they are as apt and as soon friends when their anger 's over as they are apt to fall out when they are friends and I make no doubt to make them friends but the business is to keep them friends and the question is whether it were not better they should be parted friends than present enemies Makepeace Yet we have discharged our parts if we make or do our indeavour to make them friends Perswader Well Sir perswade the Husband and I will try to perswade the Wife Exeunt Scene 26. Enter Monsieur Disguise and Sir Francis Inconstant SIr Francis Inconstant Sir you do amaze me for I have not been so long married as to give her time for Incontinency nor have I been so ill a Husband as yet as to create or beget her hate towards me Disguise Sir if I do not prove it I shall be content to suffer the heaviest punishment you can inflict upon me and because your belief is wavering I will place you where you shall hear her declare her intentions as towards your Death Inconstant I long to prove the Truth Exeunt Scene 27. Enter the Lady Wanton and the Lady
in foul disgrace Single But hopes and fears bribe or force the VVorld to praise a worthless He or Shee Fool. 'T is true hopes of gain are bribes and fear of punishments are threats for to perswade or force the tongue to flatter yet none but Gods and Kings are subject to this flattery and you are not to marry either the one nor yet the other for Gods joyn not to Mortals and Kings are far too proud to marry Subjects nor were it good for you if that they would as that you were matcht to a King for happiness lives in equallity Single Faith thou art too wise to wear a Fools-Coat wherefore cast it oft Fool. And faith I should be more Fool than my profession makes me if I should cast it off therefore I will keep it on Exeunt ACT V. Scene 39. Enter the Lady Inconstant and Monsieur Disguise LAdy Inconstant O my Dear love I have such an opportunity that Fortune could never have given me a better for my Husband is fallen Sick and if I Poyson him now the VVorld will say and think it was his Sickness that kill'd him and that will secure me Disguise I he be Sick perchance he may dye and that will save you the labour and hazard of poysoning Inconstant O But if he should recover again then I were undone wherefore I will not venture to rely upon his Sickness Disguise Use your discretion but t is not fit we should be seen together wherefore I will kiss your hands and leave you for a time Inconstant And I hope the next time we meet we shall be rid of the obstructor of our loves Exeunt Scene 39. Enter the Lady Wanton and the Lady Procurer LAdy Wanton Madam did you give Monsieur Amorous the present I sent you to give him Procurer Yes there was Shirts Caps and Handkerchiefs of each two dozen Wanton There were so Procurer They were of the finest Holland and Flanders Lace that ever I saw what might the present cost you Wanton Not much above five hundred pounds Procurer You speak as if it were but a slight present but if your Husband knew of it he would think it were too much by four hundred ninety and nine pound nineteen shillings eleven pence halfpeny farthing Wanton But what said Monsieur Amorous when you presented that present as from me Procurer At the first he would not receive the present saying it was too costly and that he could not return enough thanks for it and so should seem as ungratefull against his will but at last upon my perswasion he took your present and to Morrow he will come and give you thanks Wanton I had rather meet him in some other place than receive his visit at home where my Husband is Exeunt Scene 40. Enter the Lady Poverty weeping and two or three Children following her Then Enters her Husband LAdy Poverty Husband how shall these Children live Spendall By Heavens Providence Wife Poverty I fear they will starve unless your providence feeds them Spendall It was imprudently done to get them Poverty But now they are got they must be provided for Spendall Yes as Beggers provide for their Children put them to the Parish Poverty The Parish will not keep them Spendall Then sell them to Animal Merchants they will Traffick with them into the Barbadoes or Barmudes or Virginy or the like places Poverty And how shall I live Spendall Why you may go along and be their Nurse Poverty And the Merchants Whore Spendall As you can agree for he may sell you at as great a prize after as if you were honest besides your Children will prove you to be fruitfull for which they will give a double or trebble price for you and if you thrive send me word and I will come to you if I cannot live here Poverty I thank you Husband for you have made me miserably unhappy by your mispendings yet you would feed upon my good fortune if it can be call'd good fortune to thrive with dishonesty Spendall Faith Fortune hath undone me but may be she will be charitable to you Poverty I hope so for Fortune never befriends those whom Vices besots and though your deboysteries have undone you I hope my Virtues will help to save me Spendall But I never perceived your virtue to do you any good but for any thing I perceive to the contrary you are like to starve for all your virtues Poverty I hope when I am parted from you and your wickedness Heaven will powre down some mercy on me Exeunt Scene 41. Enter the Lady VVanton and the Lady Procurer LAdy Wanton Pray Madam inform me where Monsieur Amorous is for I have sent two or three times to his Lodging and my Messenger is answered still he is from home Procurer He is a wanderer Wanton I think he is wandred into some other parts of the World for after he went from us I sent a dozen Letters whilst I staid in the Country and received not one answer Procurer Faith Madam Monsieur Amorous is one of the lasiest of Mankind Wanton I am resolv'd when I see him to chide him for I could not conveniently do it when he came to give me thanks for my present Enter Sir Thomas Cuckold Procurer Sir Thomas Cuckold you are welcome to the Town for though I have had the Honour to see your Lady two or three times yet I could not got a sight of you never since you came out of the Country Cuckold My Wife did wish for your Company whilst we were in the Country a hundred times Procurer I should be glad to be in any place to do my Lady Service Cuckold I was abroad even now where I met Monsicur Amorous who lookt upon me as if he knew me not or rather as if he did despise me Procurer Perchance he did not know you Cuckold His memory must be very short if he could forget me so soon Wanton Perchance Husband you lookt strangely upon him Cuckold Truly Wife I went to imbrace him as I was used to do with kind love and he crost the street to shun me Wanton I dare lay my life it is some mistake Husband Procurer Friends Sir Thomas must never be exceptious Cuckold I am not apt to be exceptious I will assure you Madam no Man is freer from that humour than I am Exeunt Scene 42. Enter Sir Francis Inconstant as sick upon a Couch he being alone SIr Francis Inconstant This feigned Sickness shall serve as a snare to catch my Wives design Enter the Lady Inconstant Lady Inconstant My dear heart how are you Francis Inconstant Very Sick so Sick as I fear Heaven doth envy my happiness and will part us by Death Lady Inconstant The Gods forbid I hope you will live so long as to Crown your Virtuous life with aged years Francis Inconstant O no I find my life draws towards an end and Death will separate us from each other but you being young Wife will soon forget me placing
your love upon some other Man in whom all the remembrance of me will be buried Lady Inconstant Dear Husband speak not so Melancholy your words strike such terrour into my heart as I cannot indure to hear them I had rather Death should strike me than you Dear Husband cheer up your self your Disease is only Melancholly wherefore take such nurishing things as may give your Spirits strength and life shall I bring you a little Burnt Wine to comfort your Spirits or some Jelly broath to strenghten your Stomack Francis Inconstant If you please VVife The Lady Inconstant goes out He alone Francis Inconstant Now for the poysoned Draught Enter the Lady with a Porrenger of Broath Lady Inconstant Here my dear heart drink this He takes the Porrenger and when it was in his hand he rises and goeth to the Chamber Door and locks it Lady Inconstant VVhat mean you Husband to lock the Door Francis Inconstant Because none shall enter untill the Broath be drunk VVife She seems to be afraid and desires to go forth of the Chamber He stays her Francis Inconstant No Wife you must not go out for I mean to nourish you with that Broath that you would have nourished me with Lady Inconstant Why Husband I am not Sick I do not require Broath Francis Inconstant O yes VVife your Soul is Sick although your Body is well and this Broath may perchance cure the one although it kills the other wherefore drink it Lady Inconstant I will not Francis Inconstant You shall and if you drink it not willingly I will force it down you throat Lady Inconstant Dear Husband spare me Francis Inconstant Why I give you nothing but that which you prepared for me and if it were good for me it is good for you Lady Inconstant Dear Husband have mercy on me and I will confess my crimes Francis Inconstant No VVife no more mercy than you would have had one me and therefore drink it Lady Inconstant 'T is Poyson Husband Francis Inconstant That is the reason you shall drink it VVife Lady Inconstant Dear Husband let me live but to repent my sinns which like a black thick cloud do cover all my Soul Francis Inconstant This will be a sufficient punishment for if you be punished in this World you may escape the punishment of the next Lady Inconstant Good Husband consider youth that is apt to run into errors not being guided with good Counsel as it ought Francis Inconstant I will consider nothing and therefore drink it or by Heaven I will force you to it and therefore linger not The Lady Inconstant takes the Cap and then kneels and lifts up her eyes towards Heaven and then prayes Lady Inconstant You Gods forgive me my crimes and let this deadly draught purge clean my Soul from sin She drinks the poysoned Broath Francis Inconstant Now VVife have you any Amorous desires to Monsieur Disguise Lady Inconstant No the fire of my unlawfull love is quencht She sinks to the ground Heaven receive my Soul O O Husband forgive me Dies Francis Inconstant Ha she is dead what hath my furious passion done I was too sudden to crop her tender life so hastily without more strickt examinations for it was likely thus spruse Gallant corrupted her with his alluring looks and smoth inticing words which he knew well how to apply and youth is credulous and women soon perswaded and being joyned in one they easily are overcome I do repent He walks a turn or two in a Melancholy muse I will revenge my self of those that were the cause Exeunt Scene 43. Enter the Lady Procurer and the Lady VVanton LAdy Wanton Where is Monsieur Amorous that he comes not with you you said you would bring him with you Procurer Faith he desires to be excused for he saith he is not well Wanton This is but an excuse for he hath made an hundred within this week but since he doth neglect me I will have another that shall be more constant Procurer You are wise Madam for since men are so various as they are women would seem but fools should they be constant Wanton Well then Madam you must do me a favour for since I became acquainted with Monsieur Amorous upon your perswasion you must contrive a private meeting for me and another Gentleman upon my perswasion Procurer Sweet Lady you do oblige me to imploy me in your Service Exeunt Scene 44. Enter two Maid Servants that were the Lady Poverties 1 MAid O Ursely I am glad to see thee with all my heart 2 Maid Truly Ioan so am I to see you 1 Maid When did you hear of our good Lady the Lady Poverty 2 Maid It was not long since I saw her 1 Maid And how doth she live poor Lady 2 Maid Why she lives privately but is likely to live happy enough for let friends have now taken care of her and her Children upon the condition that she will receive no visits from her Husband but banish his Company left he should encrease their charge with more Children neither will they allow him any thing 1 Maid By my troth he doth not deserve any maintenance but I am glad she is provided for being a shiftless creature for her self and Children but where do you live Ursely 2 Maid Why I live with an old Widower 1 Maid And I with a grave Matronly Widow wherefore let us endeavour to make a match betwixt them that so we may live once again in a House together for you and I were always dear friends you know 2 Maid 'T is true Iane but as you are my friend I must tell you I should be an ill friend to my self if I should perswade my Master to marry 1 Maid Nay if it be so Ursely make the best of him and if thou wilt shew me where thou dwellest I will come and visit thee when I have leisure 2 Maid Come with me and I will shew you where I live Exeunt Scene 45. A Table set out cover'd and furnish'd with meat Enter Sir Humphrey Disagree and the Lady Disagree and their Friends every one takes their place and sits as to eat SIr Humphrey Disagree Wife where are the Fidlers that you promist we should have Lady Disagree I did forbid them to play untill such time as we had half din'd for their scraping would hinder our eating Humphrey Disagree Pray wife let them come in for I love my meat should dance in my mouth my teeth keeping just time to the tune and the Musick will make my meat turn nimbly in my mouth and will heat my cast to a high gusto Lady Disagree The noise that they will make will take away my Stomack and will make my head ake besides no body will hear one another speak neither will our Servants hear what we call for Humphrey Disagree It will make our Servants the more diligent for Musick will revive their Spirits and will make them agil wherefore pray VVife let them come in and play Lady
this discourse is that since Self-love is the Fountain of and in Nature from whence issue out several Springs to every several Creature wherein Mankind being her chiefest and Supreme work is filled with the fullest Springs from that Fountain which is the cause that Mankind is more industrious cruel and unsatiable to and for his self ends than any other Creature he spares nothing that he hath power to destroy if he fears any hurt or hopes for any gain or finds any pleasure or can make any sport or to imploy his idle time he melts metalls distills and dissolves plants dissects animals substracts and extracts Elements he digs up the bowels of the Earth cuts through the Ocean of the Sea gathers the winds into Sails fresh waters into Mills and imprisons the thinner Ayre he Hunts he Fowls he Fishes for sport with Gunns Nets and Hooks he cruelly causeth one Creature to destroy another the whilst he looks on with delight he kills not only for to live but lives for to kill and takes pleasure in torturing the life of other Creatures in prolonging their pains and lengthning their Deaths and when Man makes friendship of Love it is for his own sake either in humouring his passion or feeding his humour or to strengthen his party or for Trust or Counsel or Company or the like causes if he dies for his friend it is either for fame or that he cannot live himself happy without his friend his passion and grief making him restless if Man loves his Children Wife or Parents t is for his own sake he loves his Parents for the honour he receives by them or for the life he received of them if he loves his Wife or the Wife the Husband it is for their own sakes as their own pleasure as either for their Beauties Wits Humours or other Graces or for their Company or Friendships or because they think they love them if they love their Children it is for their own sakes as to keep alive their memory and to have their duty and obedience to bow and do homage to them If Masters love their Servants it is for their own sakes because they are trusty faithfull and industrious in their affairs imployments or for their own profit or ease and if Servants love their Masters it is for their own sakes as either for their power to protect them or for the regard they have to them or for the gain they get from them or for their lives that are nourished and maintained by them if Amorous Lovers love it is for their own sakes as to please the Appetite and to satisfy their desires if Subjects love their Soveraigns it is for their own sakes as that they may have Law and Justice Peace and Unity If Sovereigns love their Subjects it is for their own sakes because they bear up his Throne with their Wealth and Industry and fight to maintain or get him power My Application most Noble and Right Honourable is that since we do all and in every act for our own sakes we should indeavour and study for that which is best for our selves and the ground of our indeavour is to learn and know our selves every particular person must learn and know himself not by comparative as observing others for every man is not alike but by self study reading our own Natures and Dispositions marking our own Passions mours and Appetites with the Pen of Thought and Ink of Examination and let the Truth be the Tutor to instruct you in the School of Reason in which you may Commence Master of Art and go out Doctor of Judgment to practise Temperance for Temperance keeps in its full strength prolongs Beauty quickens Wit ripens Youth refreshes Age restores Decayes keeps Health maintains Life and hinders Times ruines but Temperance is not only a Doctor of Physick a Physician to the Body but a Doctor of Divinity a Divine for the Soul It preaches and teaches good Life it instructs with the Doctrine of Tranquillity and guides to the Heaven of Happiness also Temperance is the Doctor of Musick it tunes the Senses composes the Thoughts it notes the Passions it measures the Appetites and playes a Harmonious Mind Thus Most Noble and Right Honourable I have proved that Self-love is the Fountain of Nature and the Original Springs of her Creatures and that Temperance is the strongest Foundation of Self-love although few build thereupon but upon Intemperance which is a huge Bulk of Excess the substance of Riot worm eaten with Surfers rotten with Pain and sinks down to death with Sickness and Grief not being able to bear and uphold Life wherefore build your Lives upon Temperance which is a strong and sure Foundation which will never fail but will uphold your Lives as long as Time and Nature permits them and your Souls will dwell peaceably and happily therein Exeunt ACT V. Scene 14. Enter Madamoiselle Amor alone as musing to her self alone then speaks MAdamoiselle Amor I will confess to him my Love since my designs are Noble but O for a woman to woo a man is against Nature and seems too bold nay impudent only by a contrary custome but why should not a woman confess she loves before she is wooed when after a seeming coyness gives consent as being won more by a Treaty than by Love when her obscure thoughts know well her heart was his at first bound as his prisoner and only counterfeits a freedome besides it were unjust although an antient custome if dissembling should be preferred before a Modern Truth for length of Time and often practices makes not Falshood Truth nor Wrong Right nor Evill Good then I will break down Customs Walls and honest Truth shall lead me on Love plead my Sute and if I be deny'd My heart will break and Death my Face will hide Exit Scene 15. Enter Monsieur Esperance and his Wife Madamoiselle Esperance MOnsieur Esperance Wife whither do you go when I come near you you always turn to go from me Madamoiselle Esperance I saw you not for I had rather be fixt as a Statue than move to your dislike Monsieur Esperance Why do you blush surely you are guilty of some crime Madamoiselle Esperance 'T is said blushing comes unsent for and departs without leave and that it oftner visits Innocency than guilt Madamoiselle Esperance weeps Monsieur Esperance What do you weep Madamoiselle Esperance How can I otherwise choose when my Innocent Life and True Love is suspected and all my pure affections are cast away like dross and the best of all my actions condemn'd as Traytors and my unspotted Chastity blemish'd with soul Jealousy and defamed with slandering words Monsieur Esperance Prethy Wife do not weep for every tear wounds me to Death and know it is my extreme Love which creates my fears but you might have had a Husband with more faults Madamoiselle Esperance 'T is true but not so many noble qualities as you have which makes
our lives did part After she had walkt silently a turn or two about her Chamber her eyes being sixt on the ground she return'd as to her Bed Exit Scene 15. Enter a Gentleman and another meets him as in great haste 1 GEnt. What news what news 2 Gent. Sad news for there hath been a Battel fought betwixt the two Armies and our Army is beaten and many of our gallant men slain 1 Gent. I am sorry for that The second Gentleman goeth out Enter a third Gentleman 1 Gent. Sir I suppose you are come newly from the Army pray report the Battel 3 Gent. Truly I came not now from the Army but from the Town the Generals heroical Lady and the rest of the heroicks did surprize seise and plunder 1 Gent. What the Garrison Town they were sent to for safety 3 Gent. Yes 1 Gent. And doth their number encrease 3 Gent. O very much for after the suprisal of the Town the women in that Town did so approve of their gallant actions as every one desired to be inlisted in the roul and number of the Amazonian Army but in the mean time of the forming of their Army intelligence was brought of the Battel which was fought and that there was such loss of both sides as each Army retir'd back being both so weak as neither was able to keep the Field but that the loss was greater on the reformed Army by reason there was so many of their gallant men slain but this news made many a sad heart and weeping eyes in the Female Army for some have lost their Husbands some their Fathers others their Brothers Lovers and Friends 1 Gent. Certainly this will fright them out of the Field of War and cause them to lay by their Heroick designs 3 Gent. I know not what they will do for they are very secret to their designs which is strange being all women Exeunt ACT IV. Scene 16. Enter two women like Amazons 1 WOman Our Generalless seems to be troubled perceiving how heavily this Female Army takes their losses 2 Woman She hath reason for it may hinder or at least obstruct her high designs Exeunt Scene 17. Enter the Lady Victoria and her Amazons she takes her stand and speaks to them LAdy Victoria Noble Heroicks I perceive a mourning veil over the Face of this Female Army and it becomes it well for 't is both natural and human to grieve for the Death of our friends but consider constant Heroicks tears nor lamentations cannot call them out of the grave no petitions can perswade Death to restore them nor threats to let them go and since you cannot have them alive being Dead study and be industrious to revenge their quarrels on their Enemies lives let your justice give them Death for Death offer upon the Tombs of your Friends the lives of their Foes and instead of weeping Eyes let us make them weep through their Veins wherefore take courage cast off your black Veil of Sorrow and take up the Firematch of Rage that you may shoot Revenge into the hearts of their Enemies to which I hope Fortune will favour us for I hear that as soon as the Masculine Army have recovered strength there will be another Battel fought which may be a means to prove our loves to our Friends our hate to our Enemies and an aspiring to our honour and renown wherefore let us imploy our care to fit our selves for our march All the women We shall follow and obey you where and when and how you please Exeunt Scene 18. Enter Doctor Educature and Nell Careless the Doctor weeps DOctor Educature Doth my Lady hear of my Lords Death Nell Careless The Messenger or Intelligencer of my Lords Death is now with her Exeunt Scene 19. Enter Madam Jantil and a Gentleman Intelligencer the Lady seems not disturb'd but appears as usually MAdam Iantil. How died my Lord Gentleman Madam he fought with so much courage as his actions will never dye and his valour will keep alive the memory of this War for though he died his Death was Crown'd with Victory he digg'd his Grave out of his Enemies sides and built his Pyramid with heaps of their Bodies the groans of those he slew did ring his dying Knell Madam Iantil. What became of his body Gentleman He gave order before the Armies joined to fight that if he were kill'd his body should be sought out and delivered to you for he said it was yours whilst he lived and he desired it might be disposed of by you when he was dead his desires and commands were obeyed and his body is coming in a Litter lapt in Searcloth Madam Iantil. Worthy Sir I give you many thanks for your noble relation assuring my self it is true because you report it and it is my Husband that is the subject and ground of that honourable relation whom I always did believe would out-act all words Gentleman He hath so Madam Madam Iantil. Sir if I can at any time honourably serve you I shall be ready whensoever you will command me Gentleman Your Servant Madam He was going forth and returns If your Ladyship hath not heard of Monsieur la Hardy's Death give me leave to tell you he is slain Madam Iantil. I am sorry and for his Lady for she loved him most passionably The Gentleman goes out Enter as running and calling out Doll Pacify Madam Passionate's Maid Doll Pacify Help help my Lady is dead my Lady is fallen into a swound at the report of my Masters being kill'd The Lady goeth out and the Maid then they enter strait again with two or three Servants more bringing in the Lady Passionate as in a swound Madam Iantil. Alas poor Lady her Spirits are drown'd in Sorrow and Grief hath stopt her breath loosen her Garments for she is swell'd with troubled Thoughts her Passions lie on heaps and so oppress life it cannot stir but makes her senceless Upon the loosing of her garments she revives and cryes out Madam Passionate O my Husband my Husband She swounds again Madam Iantil. Bow her forward bow her forward Madam Passionate revives again Madam Passionate O let me dye let me dye and bury bury me with him Swounds again Madam Iantil. Alas poor Lady put her to Bed for her life will find most case there The Servants goes out with Madam Passionate Madam Jantil alone Madam Iantil. O life what art thou and Death where doest thou lead us or what dissolv'st thou us into Exeunt Scene 20. Enter two Gentlemen 1 GEnt. I wonder there is no news or Messenger come from the Army yet when there usually comes one every day Enter a Messenger 2 Gent. O Sir what news Messenger Faith there hath been nothing acted since the last Battel but it is said there will be another Battel very suddenly for the Enemy provokes our men to fight by reason our Lord General lies sick of his wounds having had a Feavour caused by the anguish of his hurts and by his Sickness
naturally an eloquent Orator yet the bare truth of his worthy Virtues and Heroical actions will be sufficient to make the story both profitable delightfull and famous also I must intreat you to choose out a Poet one that doth not meerly write for gain or to express his own wit so much as to endeavour to Pencil with the pen Virtue to the life which in my Lord was so beautifull as it was beyond all draughts but the theam will inspire his Muse and when both these works are writ printed and set out as divulged to the World as a patern for examples which few will be able to imitate then I would have these books ly by me as Registers of memory for next unto the Gods my life shall be spent in Contemplation of him I know I shall not need to perswade you to do this for your affection to his memory is ready of it self but love and duty binds me to express my desires for his Fame leaving nothing which is for my part thereunto Doctor Educature Madam all the service I can do towards the memory of my dear Pupil and noble Lord and Patron shall be most devoutly observed and followed for Heaven knows if I had as many lives to dispose of as I have lived years I would have Sacrificed them all for to haue redeemed his life from Death Doctor Educature goes out Madam Jantil alone Madam Iantil. When I have interred my Husbands body and all my desires thereunto be finished I shall be at some rest and like an Executrix to my self executing my own will distributing the Rites and Ceremonies as Legacies to the dead thus the living gives the dead but O my Spirits are tired with the heavy burden of Melancholy and grow faint for want of rest yet my senses invite me thereunto yet I cannot rest in my Bed for frightfull Dreams disturb me wherefore I will ly down on this floor and try if I can get a quiet sleep on the ground for from Earth I came and to Earth I would willingly return She lays her self down upon the ground on one side of her Arm bowing leaning upon her Elbow her Forehead upon the palm of her hand bowing forwards her face towards the ground but her grief elevating her passion thus speaks Madam Iantil. Weep cold Earth through your pores weep Or in your bowels my salt tears fast keep Inurn my sighs which from my grief is sent With my hard groans build up a Monument My Tongue like as a pen shall write his name My words as letters to divulge his fame My life like to an Arch over his Ashes bend And my desires to his grave descend I warn thee Life keep me not Company I am a friend to Death thy Enemy For thou art cruell and every thing torments Wounding with pain all that the World presents But Death is generous and sets us free Breaks off our Chains and gives us liberty Heals up our wounds of trouble with sweet rest Draws our corrupted passions from our breast Layes us to sleep on Pillows of soft case Rocks us with silence nothing hears nor sees She fetches'a great sigh O that I may here sleep my last After a short slumber she wakes If it were not for Dreams sleep would be a happiness next unto Death but I find I cannot sleep a long sleep in Death I shall not dye so soon as I would Love is so strong and pure it cannot dy Lives not in sense but in the Soul doth lye Why do I mourn his love with mine doth dwell His love is pleas'd mine entertains it well But mine would be like his one imbodied Only an Essence or like a Godhead Exeunt Scene 22. Enter Doctor Comfort and Doll Pacify DOctor Comfort How doth our Lady Doll Doll Pacify To day she began to sit up but yet she is very weak and faint Doctor Comfort Heaven help her Doll Pacify You that are Heavens Almner should distribute Heavens gifts out of the purse of your mouth and give her single Godly words instead of single silver pence to buy her some Heavenly food to feed her famisht mind Doctor Comfort Thou are a full-fed wench Doll Pacify If I were no better fed than you feed me which is but once a week as on Sundayes I should be starved Doctor Comfort You must fast and pray fast and pray Exeunt ACT V. Scene 23. Enter two Gentlemen 1 GEnt. All the young Gallants in the Town are preparing themselves with fine Cloths and Feathers to go a woing to the two rich Widows the Lady Iantil and the Lady Passionate 2 Gent. Riches are the Loadstone of affection or at least professions 1 Gent. The truth is Riches draw more Suters than Youth Beauty or Virtue Exeunt Scene 24. Enter two or three Gentlemen Monsieur Comerade Monsieur Compagnion and Monsieur la Gravity Monsieur Comerade For Heavens sake let us go and address our selves to the two Rich Widows Monsieur Compagnion For my part I will address my self to none but the young Widow the Lady Iantil and to her let us go without delay Monsieur la Gravity It will be uncivil to go so soon after their Husbands Death for their Husbands are not yet laid in their Graves Monsieur Compagnion If they were we should come too late for I knew a man which was a great friend of mine who was resolved to settle himself in a married course of life and so he went a wooing to a Widow for a Widow he was resolved to marry and he went a wooing to one whose Husband was but just cold in his grave but she told him she was promised before so he wooed another whilst she followed her Husbands Corps but she told him he came too late whereat he thought with the third not to be a second in his Sute and so expressed his desires in her Husbands sickness she told him she was very sorry that she had past her word before to another for if she had not she would have ma le him her choice whereat he curst his imprudence and wooed the fourth on her wedding day who gave him a promise after her Husband was dead to marry him and withall she told him that if she had been married before it had been ten to one but he had spoke too late for said she when we are Maids we are kept from the free conversation of men by our Parents or Guardians but on our wedding day we are made free and set at liberty and like as young Heirs on the day of one and twenty we make promises like bonds for two or three lives wherefore I fear we shall miss of our hopes for these two Widows will be promised before we address our Sute Monsieur la Gravity No no for I am confident all do not so for some love to have the freedoms of their wills for every promise is a bondage to those that make a Conscience to keep their promise besides it is not only variety that pleaseth women but
is my Secretary Secretary Here Madam Madam Iantil. Read the Will I caus'd you to write down The Will read I Jantil the Widow of Seigneur Valeroso do here make a free gift of all these following Item All my Husbands Horses and Saddels and whatsoever belongs to those Horses with all his Arms Pikes Guns Drums Trumpets Colours Waggons Coaches Tents and all he had belonging to the War to be distributed amongst his Officers of War according to each degree I freely give Item All his Library of Books I give to that College he was a Pupill in when he was at the University Item To all his Servants I give the sum of their yearly wages to be yearly paid them during their lives Item I give two hundred pounds a year pension to his Chaplin Doctor Educature during his life Item I give a hundred pound a year pension to his Steward during his life Item I give fifty pound a year pension to his Secretary during his life Item I give a hundred pound per annum for the use and repair of this Tomb of my dead Husbands Item I give a thousand pounds a year to maintain ten religious persons to live in this place or House by this Tomb Item I give three thousand pounds to enlarge the House and three thousand pounds more to build a Chapell by my Husbands Tomb Item Two hundred pounds a year I give for the use and repair of the House and Chapell Item I give my Maid Nell Careless a thousand pound to live a single life Item I give the rest of my Estate which was left me by my Husband Seigneur Valeroso to the next of his name These following Speeches and Songs of hers my Lord the Marquess of Newcastle writ Iantil. So 't is well O Death hath shakt me kindly by the hand To bid me welcome to the silent grave 'T is dead and nuns sweet Death how thou doest court me O let me clap thy fallen Cheeks with joy And kiss the Emblem of what once was lips Thy hollow Eyes I am in love withall And thy ball'd head beyond youths best curl'd hair Prethee imbrace me in thy colder Arms And hug me there to sit me for thy Mansion Then bid our Neighbour worms to feast with us Thus to rejoyce upon my holy day But thou art slow I prethee hasten Death And linger not my hopes thus with thy stay 'T is not thy fault thou sayest but fearfull nature That hinders thus Deaths progress in his way Oh foolish nature thinks thou canst withstand Deaths Conquering and inevitable hand Let me have Musick for divertisement This is my Mask Deaths Ball my Soul to dance Out of her frail and fleshly prison here Oh could I now dissolve and melt I long To free my Soul in Slumbers with a Song In soft and quiet sleep here as I ly Steal gently out O Soul and let me dy Lies as a sleep SONG O You Gods pure Angels send her Here about her to attend her Let them wait and here condoul Till receive her spotless Soul So Serene it is and fair It will sweeten all the Air You this holy wonder hears With the Musick of the spheres Her Souls journey in a trice You 'l bring safe to Paradice And rejoice the Saints that say She makes Heavens Holy-day The Song ended she opens her Eyes then speaks Death hath not finish'd yet his work h 'is slow But he is sure for he will do 't at last Turn me to my dear Lord that I may breath My last words unto him my dear Our marriage join'd our flesh and bone Contracted by those holy words made one But by our Loves we join'd each others heart And vow'd that death should never us depart Now death doth marry us since now we must Ashes to ashes be mingling our dust And our joy'd Souls in Heaven married then When our frail bodyes rise wee 'l wed again And now I am joy'd to lie by thy lov'd side My Soul with thy Soul shall in Heaven reside For that is all my In this last word she dies which when her Servants saw they cryed out she is dead she is dead Here ends my Lord Marquesses writing Doctor Educature sayes thus Doctor Educature She is dead she is dead the body hence convey And to our Mistriss our last rights wee 'l pay So they laid her by her Husband upon the Tomb and drawing off the Tomb goe out Exeunt ACT V. Scene 20. Enter Citizens Wives and their Apprentices 1 CItizens Wife Where shall we stand to see this triumphing 2 Citizens Wife I think Neighbour this is the best place 3 Citizens Wife We shall be mightily crouded there 2 Citizens Wife For my part I will stand here and my Apprentice Nathaniel shall stand by me and keep off the croud from crouding me Nathaniel Truly Mistriss that is more than I am able to do 3 Citizens Wife Well Neighbour if you be resolved to stand here we will keep you Company Timothy stand by me Timothy If you stand here Mistriss the Squibs will run under your Clothes 3 Citizens Wife No matter Timothy let them run where they will They take their stand 1 Citizens Wife I hope Neighbour none will stand before us for I would not but see this Lady Victoria for any thing for they say she hath brought Articles for all women to have as many Husbands as they will and all Trades-mens Wives shall have as many Apprentices as they will 2 Citizens Wife The Gods bless her for it Enter a Croud of people She is coming she is coming Officers come Stand up close make way Enter many Prisoners which march by two and two then enter many that carry the Conquered spoils then enters the Lady Victoria in a gilt Chariot drawn with eight white Horses four on a breast the Horses covered with Cloth of gold and great plumes of feathers on their heads The Lady Victoria was adorned after this manner she had a Coat on all imbrodered with silver and gold which Coat reach'd no further than the Calfs of her leggs and on her leggs and feet she had Buskins and Sandals imbroidered suitable to her Coat on her head she had a Wreath or Garland of Lawrel and her hair curl'd and loosely flowing in her hand a Crystall Bolt headed with gold at each end and after the Chariot marched all her Female Officers with Lawrel Branches in their hands and after them the inferiour she Souldiers then going through the Stage as through the City and so entring again where on the midst of the Stage as if it were the midst of the City the Magistrates meet her so her Chariot makes a stand and one as the Recorder speaks a Speech to her VIctorious Lady you have brought Peace Safety and Conquest to this Kingdome by your prudent conduct and valiant actions which never any of your Sex in this Kingdome did before you Wherefore our Gracious King is pleased to give you that which was never granted nor