a Lamb do there they saw thee in their ravenous jaws about to tear thy heart to suck out all thy blood and leave thee dead Have I not sat and read and read and wept in viewing over the story and could they forbear that with their watry eyes saw this scene then acted But whither O whither O ye blinded Jews are ye dragging this my Lord My spirit begins to faint I now can look no longer my heart now begins to swell with grief it must now break or I must vent it at mine eyes in streams Look see the Hammer and Nails the Hammer lift up to strike Bloody man thou durst not sure surely thou dost not know whose hands and feet thou art now piercing it is the Prince and Saviour of the world Foolish heart see how thou art mistaken look see it 's done the nails are driven to the head see how the crimson tears run trickling down his hands and feet and see how hardened hearts be laughing at it Oh silly foolish blinded men what laugh you at This very Christ whom now you mock shall be your Judg this very man Jesus whom you have thus abused shall come attended with thousands of Angels with the sound of Trumpets and shall sit upon your life and death Him whom you now have nailed to a Cross hath God exalted to be a Prince and a Saviour What then will you do when that great and terrible day of the Lord shall come How will you look him in the face whom you have spit on How will you dare to speak a word for your selves to him whom you have nailed to a tree and crucified His wounds in hands side and feet shall all bear witness against you and his innocent blood that you have spilt shall cry aloud about the throne for vengeance against you your flouts shall then be turned into tears and your taunts into lamentations And how will you then look and cry when God passeth sentence on you and thrust you down to Hell to bear the punishment of your sins this is the Lord that came to spare your lives yet your wickedness spared not his and how at length can you think to escape with yours But once again look up my soul and see what is become of thy nailed and crucified Lord Ah me he is not quite dead look how he gasps and pants for life Oh how his looks are changed How pale and wan do I see his cheeks the blood and all the spirits are quite drawn from them Methinks he should be dead for see how weak his neck is grown that it is not able to support his head that lyes a dying on his bleeding breast What yet not dead see how he shakes and stirs his dying limbs what gasps and groans do I hear him fetch as if his soul were strugling to get out Hark hark he speaks Oh let me catch the last breath of my dying Saviour What saith my Lord Hark what dost thou not hear what My God my God why hast thou forsaken me I am amazed to hear these words How couldst thou suspect thy Fathers love How could he be far from thee who was one with thy self But Oh! this is but the voice of his Manhood and not of his Godhead It was the voice of the dying and bleeding Man Jesus not the voice of the God Jesus But Oh my Lord what are those pains and gripes thou feelest that brings forth these complainings But why do I ask this question hath he not been all this while a drinking up the cup his Father gave him the bitter and sowr and poysonous cup of his Fathers wrath which I and all the world had else drunk of he just now swallowed down the last mouth full of the dregs whose bitter noisome taste hath sent forth these doleful lamentations for mark he had no sooner spoke these words but he gasped his last The causes of his Death And must the Son of God be humbled thus must he that was from everlasting raised and advanced above every name in heaven and earth he that lay in the arms and breast of God loved by the Father and his only Son honoured adored admired and beloved of ten thousand times ten thousands of Angels But must this God leave all this glory and change that sweet Heavenly and delightsome Palace for so mean so low so dirty a cottage as to be born a man And must his entertainment at first be no better than a stable or a manger could give him No sooner must he begin to live but must an enemy assault his life Must he travel up and down this earth and spend his time and strength in preaching glad tidings to miserable undone men and fill the world with signs and wonders and not deserve so much of men as a house to dwell in or a hole to put his head in and after all this humble holy long-suffering life must he be thought of by this unthankful and unbelieving world as one not worthy to live and not have a breathing in that air which he both made and gave them to breathe in but must he at length be laid hold of by a traiterous Judas that he had once taken for one of his own Apostles and must he suffer all this But ah alas what is this must he be also crowned with thorns and must he sweat and bleed Oh far more than tongue can utter Oh astonishing condescension thus did the Son become a servant and learn'd obedience by his sufferings and served a three and thirty years apprenticeship in the pain and travel of his soul here on earth a longer time than Jacob served for his beloved Rachel and that because he loved us better and therefore gave a better dowry for us But had I lived to have seen this Prince of Glory thus disguis'd this Eastern Sun thus benighted in a cloud this glorious God thus wrapped up in rags of flesh should I have known him or not my sensual heart I doubt thee much wouldst thou have cleaved to him loved him better than thy life and have said Though all leave thee I will not and with Paul I am willing and ready not only to be bound but to die for thee What thinkst thou Oh my soul couldst thou have left Husband Wife Father and Mother and all the rest of thy friends and have sold all that thou hast and followed him what him whom the Prophet foretold Isa 53.23 He hath no form or comeliness in him that you should desire him he is despised and rejected of men a man of sorrows and acquainted with griefs Tell me tell me couldst thou have divorced thy self from all and have taken this seemingly uncomely person for thy Lord and only Husband Ah me I do not know my heart but surely had I known him as I do now know him I should not have stuck at any thing for him For what if his Face did want comeliness seeing it came so with tears and grief
him thither as a mourner Shall it be said of the Prince of glory that he died and had the burial of an ass because there was none to sorrow forth those words of Ah my Lord What! shall it be granted to a Wife to mourn for the death of a beloved Husband and to a Child at the burial of a beloved Father Shall not such be blamed but rather pitied And shall their friends come in and confess the loss and the ground of their sorrow just and rather sit them down and bear them company in their grief And must I of all be thus censur'd Away with an Husband Wife or Child to me Is he not more to me than ten Husbands Might I not have had an hundred that would have never done half so much for me as he hath done That first left his glory for my sake and then laid down his life and took the stroke upon himself that I my self deserved and all because he lov'd me Was ever friend like this friend and ever love like this love Many waters cannot quench love but neither waters blood death nor many deaths could quench his love to me But shall he love and die in love and thus be forc'd to leave me because he lov'd me and I not mourn the absence of my best Beloved How unreasonably may any this deny me But ah what a bitter-worded check did I even now receive as if my sorrow would arise from the envying of his now glorious state and not from any love I bear him Oh! what needle-pointed words are those methinks they have pierc'd mine heart in every part and from each prick hath started forth a drop that hath set it o're with a bloody dew But how can it once be thought that envy should get a room in an heart that 's full of love with which it swells it bubbles up and runs all over it cannot be Bear witness heavens I do not grieve that you contain him but that I on earth have lost him Oh my God! I am not sorry that thy Son hath past his sufferings and is arriv'd to rest and got again into thy bosom his ancient nest of love and pleasure Oh you blessed Orders of Seraphims and Cherubims and you innumerable company of the spirits of the just men made perfect I do not envy that you have my Lord with you that you see his face and live and walk and joy in the light of his countenance Alas we your poor Brethren could not make him so welcome here on earth as you can there we lov'd him as sincerely as you and believ'd in him and took delight too in him but yet nothing near so much as you You know him better than we do for you know him as you are known and therefore know better how to prize him We know him but in part and the value price and love could but be in the like proportion He is therefore far much better there than here and how shall I then either envy him or you And what my soul should I wish him back again what if I thought I could prize and love him more and could promise the like for all his beloved disciples I could not alike engage for the wicked envious malicious unbelieving world I could not promise he should meet with no other Herod to seek his life or that the hard-hearted Jews would give him better entertainment whom they dare yet curse with the name of Conjurer though Moses and their Prophets bore witness to him and though they received a seal from Heaven in voices thunders signs and an innumerable company of real Miracles Oh no! my Lord though I could wish to fee thy face again on earth yet not in such a state of misery in the midst of a den of Bears and Lions as not long since thou wast Ah! thou knowest I took no delight to hear that traiterous news of thine own Apostle that had betray'd thee and that it fill'd mine heart with anguish to hear how shamefully and scornfully thou wast abused Thou sawest me blush when I heard thy face was spit on my head did ake when thine was crowned with thorns Anguish and indignation did loose my nerves and with a palsie shook mine hands when thine had a mock-Scepter put into them a reed and a scoff Hail Jesus King of the Jews And did not mine heart break and bleed to hear that thine was pierced Ah my Lord and shall I yet find an heart to wish thee here again No no I am glad thou hast escap'd their bloody hands and now got quite without their reach I am glad thou hast got to perfect ease and rest and know'st no pains nor griefs nor sorrows Oh! take a full possession of thy Fathers breast and sit thee down upon his Throne Thou art a King for ever And take delight in these thy soul-did travel die and bleed for on earth I will repine at nothing that shall advance thy glory But Oh! thou cruel bloody unbelieving world you wicked murtherous bloody Jews though I rejoice my Lord is safe arrived home and quietly landed within his haven yet from you I cannot hold mine anger that made his Sea a Sea of blood and drain'd his heart to make it deep and fill'd his sails with sighs and groans that caus'd his voyage to be so doleful What good got you to stand and laugh to see him sorrowful to scoff and jeer to hear his lamentations what cursed rage was that to make such hast to fetch him vinegar and gall to prolong his life to lengthen out his dolors How could you find such barbarous hearts to triumph over a bleeding dying lamb that was so innocent How could you taunt at him when you heard him praying for you Father forgive them and so tenderly excusing you for they know not what they do Methinks that kindly harmless carriage should have pierced your hearts those melting words should have dissolv'd them and instead of piercing him I should have thought you pierced And ah but that I know an unbelieving heart my self and understand what hardness means I should stand and wonder Oh! it 's too hard an Adamant for downy words and doleful sounds and tender carriages to break and shatter How often have I outstood all those my self And when I served my flesh how little did I mind them And when they have been presented to me in the Gospel or in a Sermon told that all these tortures he endur'd for me and I in part believed it too yet was I not as a man bereft of my senses and I was no more mov'd in mine heart as if I had not heard or understood and were quite bereav'd of sense and reason But had I thus continued in my senseless unbelieving state and as I liv'd so died yet how deservedly should I have born the wrath of God and have been sent to Hell as a recompence of mine unbelief And yet you careless secure Jews can you think to escape when
God comes to make inquisition for blood How will you do if this sin shall find you out If God requires blood for blood what will become of yours If he had been no more than a common man the Law would then have required your lives for payment But how if in the end he prove a Prophet nay more than that the Son of the most high God the Prince and Saviour whom God had promised to raise the Messiah whom Moses and the Prophets bare witness to and him that you so long long'd and wisht to see How will you look what will you say what answer will you make when all these truths are cleared where will you hide your selves for shame and what will you do when confusion shall thus take hold upon you What! will you then confess the fact or will you deny it with what face can you do the first And if you do the latter the curse you and your Fathers drew upon your selves Let his blood be upon us and our children stands still on record against you and will cry you guilty Will you excuse it with your unbelieving ignorance But how will you be able to rub your brows into so much confidence How dare you say you were ignorant of him when you say you knew both Moses and the Prophets and they bare witness of him You askt a sign and did he not give you both signs and wonders How often did he cure your Lame How wonderfully did he heal your Lepers and those sick of the Palsie yea of all manner of diseases How did he open the eyes of the blind and give light to him that was born blind yea restore the withered hand and make the crooked straight and open the ears of the deaf and cast out Devils and raise the dead Therefore let all the house of Israel know assuredly that God hath made that Son Jesus whom ye have crucified both Lord and Christ Upon which Text Act. 2.36 the Author Mr. Tho. Wadsworth preach'd at Gregories Church by Pauls March 29 1656. evidencing clearly from those words 1 That the poor life and ignominious death of him that was crucified at Jerusalem was no good argument why the Jews should reject him from being the promised Messiah 2 That that very God-man named Jesus Christ that was crucified at Hierusalem was the true Messiah whom God made and appointed to be Saviour to the World If his Notes were sufficiently legible in the proving and improving of these two Propositions so that they might have been publisht as they cannot unless any took them in short-hand for his own use there would have been found in that Discourse a notable antidote against the poysons of Judaism and the Atheism of this present age Three Letters of Mr. Tho. Wadsworth to his Sister Elizabeth Wadsworth in Southwark when he was a young Student in Christs-Colledg in Cambridge wherein we may see the early breathings of his pious Soul Dear Sister YOU may remember very well that I sent a Letter to you all in general to wit my Brother and other Sisters but it is my wonder and grief that I should receive an answer from none of you I thought that your loves to me were not so contracted but that I might have procured such a favour at your hands as three or four lines in a Letter but however your not regarding of me hath not begotten in my soul such regardlesness towards you and therefore from among the rest I have chosen you out in particular to see whether you in particular will give me an answer to my other Letter I remember that the last time I was with you upon Conference that I had with you I found a good and pliable nature in you some softness of heart appear'd by that crystal dew which trickled down your cheeks I would have wisht in some respects that it had continued until this time For truly nothing speaks fairer weather in Heaven than moistned cheeks below on earth you must not think to come to Mount Zion the Heavenly Jerusalem before you have past thorow a vail of tears Heaven is not a bauble and it can't be attain'd by mirth and jollity you must not think to live merrily in Earth and in Heaven too I know you are naturally merry and jocond but you must labour to mortifie that merry nature you have you are naturally full of talk but if you love your soul you must labour to bridle the tongue Perhaps you would say O Brother this I would willingly do but I cannot tell how I will give you this answer First Labour to live more seriously to talk less let your thoughts be on God and think that he hears every word you speak and as our Saviour says You must give an account for every idle word You must not think you shall ever be swallowed up in love that you shall ever bathe your self in Divine ravishments to all eternity with God in glory and walk so lightly and vainly here on earth O that I could but perswade your soul of this If I could I know that you would desire no other glory than to swim all your life-time in a river of tears I shall not here speak of the glory which your soul should enjoy in Heaven lest my soul in writing should be swallow'd up with confusion for if I knew where to begin yet I should never know where to make an end Angels themselves have been wading these five thousand years in this Ocean and cannot come to the depth of it yea and shall be wading to all eternity with the glorified Saints and yet shall never fathom it And now if thou art willing that thy soul should accompany my soul unto this Ocean of Love take notice then of these paths which I shall here set down which will lead thee unto this desir'd happiness And truly I beg of thee and likewise charge thee in the presence of the Almighty God as thou shalt one day answer it at the Judgment-seat when God shall judg the quick and the dead that you do not when you have read this Letter cast it away and look on it no more Therefore I beseech of thee as thou art dear to me as a Sister that thou wouldst put into practise every word that I shall say First then Be constant in prayer by thy self both evening and morning and if you find any good motion in the day-time go then again to prayer And if you ask me How you should pray I answer thee pray against every sin thou find'st thy heart prone to commit Pray against thy carnal joy and beg that thou maist be most serious in thy conversation Dost thou find in thy soul that thou canst not mourn for sin Pray that God would soften thy hard heart that he would make thee to mourn to weep and lament thy sins because they are against such a tender and loving Father as God Dost thou find that thou art given to anger pettishness and frowardness pray
pore about a channel was Which pains had open'd wide Through which as through sulphureous mynes Did scalding liquors glide Amidst those simpring plashes lay My wrinkl'd par-boil'd skin In my own sweats I had expir'd Had not my good Lord been My God then dri'd up all my dews Me richest cordials gave Out of those waters I did cry And he my life did save Colds gone and waters now asswag'd A fire fast hold doth catch My muddy cottage was on flame Through sparks within my thatch Its sindgings made my former griefs Desir'd they would return That winds would blow or waters flow To cool me that did burn While my house flam'd about my ears My soul wisht to get out I cri'd I call'd my God did hear And then put th' hot fire out Next must my rest a burthen prove Unto my drowsie head My spirits spent my strength 's decay'd I was as those are dead My eyes as useless were through sleep My tongue had lost her taste Each thing it did offend my smell My flesh about did waste That very God that on dry bones Did breathe and make them live That very pow'r that Laz'rus rais'd Again this life did give He put this quickness in my joints These spirits in mine eyes Restor'd this joy unto my heart Thus answer'd all my crys HYMN XIII Remedies against Discontents THAT blessed peace which all men wish That none but good enjoy Is when all states of life do please And nothing doth annoy If thus unshaken thou wouldst live Contemplate God on high As near as may be live like him Fixt in self-constancy Wish nothing more than to be good Do justly fear no man Think on the blest eternity Let th' world do what it can Be no more mov'd with thy reproach Than God when men blaspheme Let not want loss or death affright Which men so dreadful deem Think that the world below the Moon As yet thy self contains And that all things here ebb and flow That nothing fixt remains What wonder is' t the Mariner At sea meets with a storm How boldly yet he plows the waves In danger fears no harm The traveller his weary steps Directs unto his Inn Sometimes meets Sun-shine and then storms Yet ne'r leaves travelling Are not our days and months and years Now foul and sometimes fair Variety doth not annoy Change makes things please as rare Why should I wish it always day The world without a night Why should I wish it always Spring For flowers for delight Were I not fool to weep to see A cloud creep o're the Sun Such folly is it to lament A cross when it is come II. Rash man complains In any strait But this I could be blest Any mans trouble I could bear Mine only gives no rest Says he what sorrow can be like To want and beggery This this I feel or else I fear Which makes me wish to die Man be thou faithful do thy work Thou serv'st a righteous Lord He will not let his servant want But bread will sure afford Starving-extremity thou fear'st This beggars never feel Better allowance God them gives To whom his dole he deals Hunger and cold and nakedness True blessed Paul complains Yet so as that he glorieth In them so in his chains Are not the Lilies gaily cloath'd They neither toil nor spin Are not the birds of th' air fed That ne'r brought harvest in Will God give grace and glory both Yet barely bread deny Will he give Crowns and Scepters too Of want yet let thee die True murm'ring Israel cri'd out Can God a Table spread Can he in this vast wilderness Prepare for all here bread The Devil could have taught those men That God of stones could take Could mould and knead them up to dough And of them bread could make III. The fool fears want while plenty lasts Like one in Summers day Should shake and blow his hands for cold Then winters coming say Or like one that in streams doth swim Yet gasps and crys for thirst Then says Oh me what shall I do This river leave I must It 's best things should be as they ' r made That rivers ebb and flow That glass or earthen ware may break That riches come and go Fool do'nt torment thy heart in vain If these things fleeting be Fix but thy soul on things above They ' l constant prove to thee All will be gone say let them go Man lives not all on bread There is a word of promise that In want holds up thy head I never will to death thee leave I 'le never thee forsake Think but on this do but believe Thine heart 't will joyful make IV. I know whence spring more troubles yet That do annoy me here My undertakings oft are great And I success do fear I often am engag'd in more Than able to go through Which makes me sit and moan my self Not knowing what to do Whose fault is that why didst thou so Thy God's too good a Lord To set thee on more work than he To do doth strength afford Where he finds will he doth accept With eye to what thou hast Give but thine all he wont refuse To crown that all at last I often have intended much But could not what I meant I would men save but ah I can't Because they wo'nt consent Instead of thanks for my good-will With taunting scoffs I meet I would them raise up unto Thrones They would me under feet Sometimes I talk like to a fool Deridingly they say I now teach false and then too sharp I can't please any way Be wise and such things ne'r will touch Thy heart as to disturb All thy attempts if good should joy Though insuccess them curb It 's reason to think in this world That good things should be crost If thou wilt fish for men thou must With winds and waves be tost What if I disappointments meet They are in use with men Why should I not expect to share Alike with my breth'ren What wonder is' t that they should call That false or sharp that tart That frets the sinews of their soul And that corrodes their heart Can the old man it quiet take To see him bound about That thence where so long he hath lodg'd He should be thus cast out Is not my work a warfare call'd What and no enemy How canst thou fight and not oppose Or use Heav'ns armory HYMN XIV TWO things Lord I desire of thee First that with thee I live If thou delay'st to bring me there Oh then assurance give Content I 'le be in th' shades of night Until my glory dawn Do but for surety grant this wish That I may keep the pawn Give Lord the earnest in my breast A gracious heart to see Let me but know thou dost me love And I shall quiet be Can I have peace whilst that I fear Thy curse hangs o're my head It makes my heart to ake to think What now if I were dead Pardon O Lord it