everlasting why haltest thou between two opinions 1 King 18.21 if the Lord be God follow him and if Baal be God follow him If God be better than the world follow him fully and if the world be best then pursue it with all thy might but consider well what thou dost for this will be bitterness in the latter end Hast thou so long laboured and prayed and ran and wrestled for a prize that now seems not worth having dost thou now come within sight of Heaven and doth thy heart fail thee Hast thou put thy hand to the plow and now lookest back didst thou begin in the Spirit and wilt now end in the flesh wilt thou be like wicked men and Seducers that grow worse and worse Hath the world bribed thee or the Devil stopt thy mouth Take heed thou make not Judas's purchase or Demas's choice If thou change thy master consider what is his wages as well as what is his work and if this please thee go on Dost thou want nothing here to make thee happy that thou art so loth to away well let me tell thee if thou miss of Christ thou wilt want nothing to make thee everlastingly miserable if the world be all thou expectest then 't is no wonder thou art so loth to leave it for who can willingly part with his only Happiness and be stript of all his desired enjoyments and not only so but enter into everlasting misery for so they will do that have their portion in this life and those that make the world their God or love any thing though it be life it self above Christ 'T is no wonder that these fear the Pursevant that fetches them to execution and drags them to Hell He that hath the world for his All will be loth to lose all at one cast these may look upon death as one that comes to torment them before the time death to those is like as Belshazzars hand-writing was to him a terror and amazment and there is nothing that is in the world can speak peace to such a soul if his conscience be awake 'T is not Lucretius his Epicurean Rules nor Anacreons wanton Odes can then lull it asleep or cease the barking of it or shift off the terror of death A wounded Spirit who can bear but one that believeth that death is but a gathering to his Fathers a sweet sleep a going to Christ and being with him and that the body though laid in the grave shall not be lost but raised up again at the last day and made like unto the glorified body of Christ How unsuitable is it for such to be terrifyed with the apprehensions of it but the thoughts of the Immortality and the Incorruptibility and the Spirituality and Glory of the body at the Resurrection should drown the noise silence the doubts and fears of the danger that lies in the way and the pains and pangs of death it self The pains of death to these are worse than being dead and this is but a flea-biting to the joy that follows but to the wicked the pain of dying is nothing in comparison of the consequences of death and the tormenting pains of the second death for were Hell no worse than the pangs which dying men suffer it were not so formidable Rev. â— 6 6.16 In misery men shall seek death and shall not find it and shall desire to dye and death shall flee from them then will they say to the rocks and mountains fall on us and cover us c. 'T is wonder how wicked men can eat and drink and sleep and all this while know they are in debt and danger yea that there is a Sergeant ready to arrest them whensoever the Creditor will and to cast them into prison out of which they are never like to get sure some judiciary hardness is falne upon them that they are sleeping thus on the top of the Mast and playing securely before the mouth of the Lyon or before the Cannons mouth and are more insensible than brute Beasts of their danger approaching yea they hasten their death and misery by the intemperance of their lives and sacrifice not only their health but life also to Lust and Drunkenness to luxury and excess and will not suffer Nature to spin out the thred of their lives to the utmost extent but put a period to it themselves and cut off the thred of their lives with their own hands these men run headlong to Hell and wilfully upon death which they had cause most of all to fear and avoid The apprehension of approaching death is not the same to those men and to others that believe that death will end all their miseries and land them into everlasting happiness the same Judge absolveth the innocent and condemns the guilty and those men have not the same apprehensions of him the one longs for his coming the other fears it 'T is rather a wonder that the Saints that have assurance of their future glory do not long for the time of their dissolution and seek to hasten it by some illegal way than use any indirect means to live when they are called to dye I know the former is unlawful for we must keep our station while God appoints us and so is the latter for we must come off the Centinel when he calls us but it is more natural to desire happiness than misery and to use indirect means to procure the former than the latter We read in the primitive times when many Christians were to suffer of a Woman and her children that were hasting to the place and being met by one of the persecutors who demanded whither she went and why she made so much haste she answered She was a Christian and hearing many Christians were that day to suffer she hasted with her children to suffer with them and feared lest she should come too late Ignatius was afraid lest the Prayers of the Church should prevent him of suffering for Christ and of his Crown of Martyrdome These had not such fearful apprehensions of death as thou seemest to have Sure those that look for perfection by death should not be afraid of it and if these tabernacles of our bodies must down what matter is it whether they are taken down or burnt down seeing the materials both waies will be preserved the one turns them to dust the other to ashes and in a little time they will moulder of themselves into dust Death to the godly is but a parting of two intimate friends the Soul and the Body for a time and both the one and the other will be gainers by the separation the Soul goes immediately to Heaven and the Body lies in the grave for a season and shall thence be raised in unspeakable glory and God will build it up again an habitation for the soul at his own proper cost and charges Death to them is but a Gaol-delivery where the soul that hath been long a prisoner shall be set
that cannot be redeemed with the whole World 4 Direction The next thing I would advise you to which indeed is the chief of all is to get an Interest in Christ that so you may have a title to Glory for till this be had you cannot dye safely and till it be cleared up you cannot dye comfortably for who would leave a present Possession that hath no assurance of a future and when this is done Death will not be terrible But what can bear up the Soul against the pangs of Death if this be wanting Now the way to get an Interest in Christ is to espouse the Soul to him now there is nothing but Ignorance can stave off our affections from him ignotus nulla cupido The blind World can see no Excellency in him no need of him nor any use of him and therefore they have no love nor desire for him but all that know him will love him who prizeth a Physician that is not convinc'd of his skill and finds he hath a real need of him for who will take Physick before he be sick or minds a Plaister before he have a Sore But when the poor soul is convinced of her undone condition by Nature and that there is nothing in her or that can be done by her will serve turn for Salvation yea that help is not to be had in any Creature no not in the Angels themselves could she be Espoused to them for they cannot pay her debts nor secure the Soul in this desparing condition no wonder the Soul dreads death but when it knows withall that though there be an Emptiness in the Creature there is a Fulness in Christ and that he is fully able to make her eternally happy and that Christ doth make love to her and sends many Suitors in his behalf to woe for her affection and that he is the only suitable object in the world for her Affections and that he can make her happy when all the rest would leave her miserable I say under these convictions she begins to hearken to Christs proposals when she sees he is more useful than any other and will stand her in more stead both in Prosperity and Adversity in Health Sickness in Life and at Death when all other helps fail her While the world is lookt upon to be the best match Christ will not be valued till the cheat be found out for who will forsake the better to choose the worse but when they see Christ really better than the world they will then part with the world for him for who will stick at such a bargain when a man considers that the world can do him no good at Death or Judgment But Godliness hath the promise of this life 1 Tim. 4.8 and that to come and that it is profitable to all things Rom. 8.32 and that having Christ all shall be ours for if he spared not his own Son but freely delivered him up for us all how shall he not with him freely give us all things When the match is made up between Christ and the Soul all her Debts are made over to her Husband and he is touched also with the feeling of her Infirmities bears the heavier end of the Cross and in all her afflictions he is afflicted Isa 63.9 and he makes over all his riches to her his Merits his Righteousness his Spirit his Graces and his Glory Plal. 34.10 he hath promised she shall want nothing that is good and that he will never leave her nor forsake her Rom. 8.28 and that all things shall work together for her good Now whatever he hath promised he can make it good for he is both Omnipotent and Omniscient and he will make it good for he is Faithfull and the Experience of five thousand years prove it in all which time no man could stand forth and say This Promise God hath failed in the world yields us some little comfort if God give it a Commission but Christ is all and in all all the excellency that is in the Creature is but as a Vein to lead us to this Mine as a drop of this Ocean and as a ray of this Sun whatever our condition be he can help us if the Soul be sick he is her Physician and all others are Physicians of no value if wounded he hath a Plaister of his own Blood to cure her if she hunger here is food the Bread of life and the Water of life his flesh is meat indeed and his blood drink indeed If she be Poor and Blind and Miserable and Naked he can make supplies here is a Treasure to enrich her a Pearl of great price and spiritual Eye-salve to make her see if she have Enemies he is her Champion that can overcome the Devil and all his Instruments and none can hurt her but through his sides In a word she can want nothing when her Lord and Husband possesses all things the Cattle of a thousand hills are his yea all the beasts of the Forrest with his own Robes he arrayes her and with the Jewels of his Grace he adorns her with his Spirit he directs her and if heavy laden bears her burden if she be weary he is her resting place and hath promised never to leave her nor forsake her Heb. 13.5 and then no matter what others do These promises the Soul may press home by Prayer as Jacob did in a great danger Gen. 32.9 Lord thou saidst thou wouldst do me good and this was as good as present pay for God loves to be bound by his word and to be sued upon his own bond Prayer is a putting the Promises in Suit God can no more deny such Prayers than he can deny himself what need the Soul to fear when Gods Word is out upon it That all things shall work together for her good and if all things then Afflictions nay Sin it self Seneca Venenum aliquando pro remedio fuit saith a Heathen 'T is said that to drink of the Wine wherein a Viper hath been drowned cureth the Leprosie and the Scorpion healeth his own wound the flesh of the Viper cureth the biting of the Viper and so God sometimes cureth us by the wound Sin gives us we usually say The act increaseth the habit but 't is not so here for the believer is like a Sheep that by his fall into the mire is warned to take better heed Now look over all the World and see if you can find such a match for the Soul whether any Creature in Heaven or Earth hath deserved thy Affections better than he or hath done more or will do more than Jesus Christ that is a greater Benefactor than he and hath bestowed better Gifts whether any other can pay thy Debts or make preparation for the Eternal well-being of the Soul and if he prove the fittest Match stand not upon Terms with him think not to alter his Conditions or make him abate of his Price he expects
ready to offer it up when God required it Acts 21.13 and was willing not only to be bound but to dye for Christ at Jerusalem the recompence of reward was in his eye the Crown of glory was in his sight which Christ the righteous Judge should give him at the last day Phil. 1.21 and his desire was that Christ might be magnified by him both by his life and by his death Thou canst contentedly endure pain for health and wilt thou not endure it for Christ and everlasting Happiness Wilt thou not endure some few gripes for glory Thou hadst thy life given thee upon this condition to part with it when God requires it thou art a Tenant at will and so at anothers dispose and if thou wilt surrender God will build thee up a more sumptuous house if thou wilt not he will distrain upon thee pluck down thy house shortly and cast thee into Prison Life it self was given on no other terms but to be at Gods dispose and think not that thou hast wrong Death is the common road wherein all men walk Kings and Emperours leave their Crowns and Scepters at his gate rich and poor great and small bond and free croud in at this door and travail this road if thou willingly resign thou maist make an advantage if not ere long thou wilt be constrained to do it upon harder terms and seeing a death thou must dye what matter is it what Messenger 't is that Death sends to distrain for this Rent whether an ordinary disease or an extraordinary Pursivant whether thou dye in thy bed or go to Heaven in a fiery Chariot and if so the Crown of Martyrdom will be thy Reward Death to the wicked is but an entrance into Hell the beginning of sorrowes yea of eternal death Rev. 20.6 but those that have a part in the first resurrection the second death of them shall have no power Oh my foul why art thou afraid of death seeing the sting is taken out and the nature of it changed let us view it a little better and see what the godly have thought of it and what the Scripture saith of it Isaiah tells thee Isa 57.1 2. The righteous are taken away from the evil to come to enter into peace and to rest in their beds and is Rest so terrible to the weary man Paul calls it a departing Phi. 1.23 and to be with Christ and is this so dangerous to lye in Christs bosom in eternal bliss Job makes no more of it than the cutting down of a flower Job 14.1 2. and is this a matter of such moment Simeon calls it a departing in peace Luk. 2.29 Lord now lettest thou thy servant depart in peace Joshua calls it The way of all the earth Joshua 32.14 Behold saith he I am this day going the way of all the earth and wilt thou be afraid of going in this beaten road In Christs account 't is but a falling asleep Our friend Lazarus sleepeth the like was said of Stephen And when he had said this Act. 7.60 he fell asleep and who is afraid of falling asleep 'T is called also a finishing our course 2 Tim. 4.7 I have fought a good fight saith Paul I have finished my course And who would be afraid of his journeys end 'T is called a going hence O spare me Psal 39.13 saith David that I may recover strength before I go hence and be no more a going home Man goeth to his long home Eccle. 12.5 saith Solomon and what danger is in going home 't is but a resting from our labour saith the Spirit Rev. 14.13 There the wicked saith Job cease from troubling and the weary are at rest Job 3.17.18.12 there the Prisoners rest together they hear not the voice of the Oppressor the small and the great are there and the Servant is free from his Master And how sweet is rest to a weary man and doubtless death to the godly is the end of all misery and the beginning of Happiness O my God I am fully convinc'd and I see great reason why I should submit to thee and lay down my life at thy feet and I resolve through thine assisting grace so to do and to submit my self to the stroak of death when and how it shall please thee Lord assist me in these resolutions lest my enemy surprize me and my deceitful heart betray me and my frail flesh insnare me and make me dishonour my God deny my Redeemer break my Peace with thee wound my Conscience and lose my soul by any sinâ—â—l complyance or denying my Life when thou cal'st for it MEDITAT II. Death is common to Good and Bad. O My Soul why art thou yet afraid at the apprehension of death why dost thou draw back why dost thou frame excuses is death any strange or unwonted thing that thou hast not seen nor heard of before then there were some cause but is it not as common as 't is for a man to be born is it not the end of all flesh the way of all the world Omnibus una manet nox et calcanda semel via lethi is it not the common road that all men tread when they go out of the world young and old great and small rich and poor good and bad all throng in at this Gate and art thou loath to stoop so low Death sometimes strikes the child in the womb and sometimes the man that stoops for Age and art thou afraid of that which unborn Babes and crooked old age undergo Heb. 9 27. and that which is as sure as the coat upon thy back It is appointed unto all men once to dye and after Death the Judgement All men dye once and most men twice but the second Death is far more formidable Job 14.1 2 5. Man that is born of a woman is of a few dayes and full of trouble He cometh up like a flower and is cut down he fleeth also as a shadow and continueth not His dayes are determined the number of his Months are with God he hath appointed his Bounds that he cannot pass Job 14.14 and 10.9 'T is therefore thy Duty all the dayes of thy appointed time to wait till thy change come for he hath made thee as the Clay and will bring thee to Dust again 1 Tim. 6.7 Wis 7.16 Thou broughtest nothing into the world and 't is certain thou shalt carry nothing out all have one entrance into Life and a like going out Death makes a very great change so that wicked men have cause to fear it the Godly to desire it and all to expect it Life flies away suddenly and cannot be retained Death comes speedily and cannot be resisted O death Ecclus. 41.1.2 how bitter is the remembrance of thee to a man that lives at rest in his possessions unto the man that hath nothing to vex him and hath prosperity in all things yea unto
ready and what hopes is there of thee if God spare thee another year that thou wilt bring forth better fruit is old age the best and fittest for repentance and preparation to dye when thou wilt find enough to do to wrastle with pains and bodily distempers would a Captain take it for a sufficient excuse if a Souldier that is by ingagement to be ready at an hours warning and should give him a week a month a years time to make ready and at the end of that time he should plead his Arms are not fixed nor other necessaries provided and if the Captain give him another year and at the end thereof he should plead the same excuse would this be taken for a good excuse yet this excuse hath been in thy mouth many years together and 't is doubt if God yet lengthen thy daies and give thee more years it will be the same Hath not death entred into thy habitation hath it not taken away thy parents thy loving wife thy dear children and other of thy near relations and didst not yet lay it to heart wa st thou no wiser than fatted beasts that are taken away one after another to the Shambles and those that remain are senseless of the danger neither consider their turn is coming yea hath not death thrown many a dart at thee and sometimes wounded thee in the head sometimes in thy bowels and yet dost not consider that he hath a dart will reach thy heart Yea sometimes thou hast thought thou hast had thy deaths wound and yet wilt take no warning to get on thy Armour doth not the pains the aches the distempers of thy body under which thou daily groanest bid thee prepare for thy winding-sheet doth not news ring dayly in thy ear this and that friend relation or neighbour is dead and ere long others will say of thee he is dead also hast thou not interred many a dead corpse and preacht may a Funeral Sermon and given many an exhortation to the living to prepare for death and comforted many that have lost their friends by death and wast never yet satisfied that thou wast mortal and must dye also didst thou think thy self only exempted from the common lot of all men or that God would bring thee to Heaven another way or couldst thou wish thou wert immortal and shouldst live on earth to Eternity art thou willing to take the Earth for Heaven and the creature for God and the happiness thou meetst with here for Heavens glory hast enough to satisfy thee here below and desirest no more if not why wouldst not dye and come to happiness if the earth be more desireable to thee one year why not twenty and why not to eternity if God should bid thee choose thy time and appoint it thy self what time wouldst thou require haply Methusalems daies well but these would expire and death at the end would be as bitter as now it is If death were the road to Hell as 't is to the wicked thou mightest well startle at it And I have wondred at those of them that have been so prodigal of their lives when Life is the only preservative out of Hell Or if thy case were that of the beasts and thou were to be reduced unto the horrid estate of nothing death might make thee shrug but when thou believest that death to thee will be an entrance into glory an outlet to misery and an inlet to happiness and the same road that Christ and all the glorified Saints have gone to Heaven in how can this be reconciled with thy fears Hast thou had so many discourses of death and with death and dost believe that the sting is taken out by Christ and dost yet run from this Serpent and take him for an enemy that is but thy Fathers Messenger sent for thy good This must needs be thy sin and thy folly and doth too evidently bespeak thy Infidelity or the weakness of thy Faith Thou hast comforted others at the last gasp and prayed with them and for them thou hast strengthened the weak hands and feeble knees and now dost faint under the same burden But hadst thou had more mortifying Meditations of death and with the Apostle hadst learned to dye daily death would not have been so terrible a Bugbear to thee as now it seems didst thou once a day look him in the face by a serious meditation and by a believing expectation he would not look so grim and terrible Bears and Tigers are not so terrible to those that are their keepers and acquainted with them as to others The Lion in the Fable was at first sight a terror to the Fox but time much allayed his fear the more thou beholdest death the less deformed yea the more lovely he doth appear death will be no excepter of persons the rich and poor high and low whether they will or no must dance in this Ring when God commands he must and will strike death is written upon thy cradle and thou wast rockt upon the mouth of the grave and ever since no day hath been sure to thee but it might have been thy dying day 't is not long since thou didst bewail the death of thy Parents and 't is not long before thy children will bewail thine one generation comes and another goes and the latter treads out the steps of the former we trod out the steps of our predecessors and our posterity will do as much for us The world is but a Tent to abide in for a time an Inne to tarry in a night a Lodging place for a wayfaring man a baiting-place in a Journey Oh the folly of most men that take it for their Inheritance and look for no more but to the Godly 't is no continuing city no abiding place neither indeed worthy our love Were the world as the garden of Eden full of delights and pleasures thou hadst something to say for it and yet the worm of time would eat out the very heart of it the shortness of the continuance would spoyl the sport Many doat on beauty but none but the blind will fall in love with deformity it self The world is a Bochim a place of Lamentation and who falls in love with sorrow 't is a Golgotha a place of dead mens skuls and who but mad men converse among the Tombs 'T is a pest-house an infected and an infecting place where most we converse with are infectious 't is a prison a place of hardship where the soul hath not liberty to act according to its nature 't is a place of Egyptian bondage and slavery where there is little but moiling toyling working caring from morning till night for a poor living wherein we are so chained to our Oars that we have scarce time to eat our meat and what madness is it over eagerly to desire such a life and to quarrel those that ease us of our burden and put an end to our labours Here thou livest under continual pains aches griefs
full of trouble Yet many wish their dayes were three times double The Captive Slaves that in the Gallies lye To end their Bondage yet are loth to dye They flee from death although he be their friend For when he stops their Breath their Sorrows end Life is a warfare Death doth stint the strife We leave not fighting till we leave our life We fight against our sins the world and Devils At death we fully Vanquish all those evils To heavenly Joyes Death opens us the door Where sin and sorrow they shall be no more There 's no Corruption shall molest us there There 's no Temptation that we need to fear Why fear we Death then he this Boon will give Our Enemies shall dye but we shall live Life is the day wherein we labour hard Death is the night and then comes our reward Now we with Tempests on the Seas are driven Death is the Wind that blows us to our Haven Is he less happy that a brisker Gale Drives to the Shore or he that 's under Sail Whom fierce tempestuous winds as yet are driving Who with a thousand dangers yet are striving In life we in the raging Surges be Death comes and lands us in Eternity In life the Saints are Heirs but under age When death comes they receive their Heritage Heaven is our Kingdom but to come thereat There is no other way but through this Gate Life is our Journey Death our Journeys end Life is our Enemy and Death our Friend Death like a Pilot guides us to the Shoar He is the Porter that must ope ' the door We cannot serve our God or Christ enjoy Without distraction till our dying day Death 's but a quiet sleep when wearied 'T is but put off our Cloaths and go to bed Death is Gods pursivant and will compell Gods Friends to go to Heaven his Foes to Hell He is his Messenger none can prevent him None can resist him or the Lord that sent him Both Prince and Peasant drink of the same cup When he invites them home with him to Sup. All men must pledge the health Abel began There 's none exempt the Master nor the man The greatest Potentate cannot escape The way to Heaven and Hell lye through this Gate The high the low the rich and eke the poor When he doth knock must open him the door Nor fear nor favour makes him turn aside He will not be perverted with a Bribe What though some have their lives drawn out at length And we cut down by Death in our full strength What Hurt to us if we receive our pay For one Hours work as much as for a day What dammage to us if Commandment come When others work till night to leave at Noon The weary labourer pants and longs for rest And when he 's in his bed he thinks he 's best The Bed of Death to th' weary will give ease Our sleep's not broken there by worms nor fleas No fearfull Dreams nor Visions of the night Disturb our Fancies there or minds affright Within Death's Sheets the Grave we rest secure Free from oppression and tyrannick Power Our Souls like Captive Birds in Cages sing Death breaks the Cage and then the Birds take wing The world 's a Pest-house sin doth us infect Death 's our Physitian shall we him reject The Soul 's infected with sins foul disease And naught but Death can give us our release The world 's a Prison and we Captives be And only Death our Champion sets us free We mortal are when Death of life bereaves us We dye no more Death doth immortal leave us A thousand Maladies do each day attend us We 're sick to Death and none but Death can mend us In life we languish Death can make us well He 's like Achilles Spear can wound and heal Poor and in want we up and down do wander Death makes us all as rich as Alexander Death levels all both rich and poor do stand On equal ground none serve nor none command When Death hath done his work there 's no man can Discern between the Master and the man The Princes Skull no more than other men Bears the impression of a Diadem 'T is true of terrors Death is call'd the King And well he may while he retains his Sting But to Believers he no hurt can do For he hath lost his Sting and Poyson too In Stinging Christ this Serpent lost his Sting He that brought terror then doth comfort bring Christ conquer'd him and shall we fear to meet A Vanquisht Foe lying prostrate at our Feet For since that he was overcome and foil'd He is no Enemy but reconcil'd To good and bad he shews not the same face He 's Foe to Nature but a Friend to Grace We are poor mortals life is our disease Death our Physitian that can give us ease We groan for pain yet would not be set free We love our Bondage hate our Liberty Rather than over Jordans streams we 'l venture We 'l dye i' th' Wilderness or Egypt enter This Son of Anak Death more terror brings Than all the fiery Serpents with their Stings And though Egyptian Bondage doth torment us Flesh Pots and Leeks and Onions here content us At Death 't is true we must to Ashes turn But God will keep those Ashes in his Urn. And when the all-awakening trump shall sound The smallest Atoms of it shall be found And then by vertue of a new Indenture The Soul into her new-built house shall enter God shall with robes of honour then invest her And sin and sorrow shall no more molest her She shall by Christ her Judge be then acquitted And all her sins and trespasses remitted She shall in glory Halelujah's sing Unto the mighty God the worlds great King And wedded be to Christ in endless Joy And in her Husbands Bosom lye for aye Sorrow and Sighing then shall fly away And Tears shall swallowed be in endless Joy Then set thy House in order for thou must Within a little time return to Dust Lord make me then to know my later end How long the number of my dayes extend That I may know how frail I am before I go from hence and shall be seen no more When will this Joyfull Marriage be oh when Oh come Lord Jesus quickly come Amen Edward Bury FINIS The Author hath in the Press a. Book on the Subject these Poems are of Printed for Tho. Parkhurst at the Bible and three Crowns at the lower end of Cheapside
't is but the weakness of thy faith and love or thou wouldst not desire to be absent from Christ upon such poor tearms Oh the hourly danger thou art in by reason of enemies without within and round about thee Oh the dangerous snares they lay for thy feet Oh the fears the cares and manyfold troubles thou daily meetest withall enough to make thee weary of thy life and with Job to wish for death and wilt not indure a little pain when it would set thee out of harms way out of the Devils reach or mans malice The love of Christ in the Martyrs was hotter than the flames they burnt in they could cry out None but Christ none but Christ true love desires union with the party beloved and how canst thou say thou lovest Christ when thy heart is not with him when thou desirest not his company or to enjoy him thou pretendest love to him and yet art willingly desirously absent from him and wilt not come to him at his call but wilt rather deny him and thy interest in him thou cal'st him thy Husband and pretendest thou hast devoted thy self wholly to him and given up not only thy Name but thy Heart to him and promised to forsake all other for him and obey him whoever was disobeyed yet when it comes to the trial with Demas thou choosest the world before him thou wilt not obey him neither forsake the world for him but lovest thy life above him what hypocrisie what dissimulation is this to pretend to follow him and yet really run from him when he calls thee well may he give thee a bill of divorce and put thee away who dost thus wilfully desert him Thou hast preacht for him and spoke for him and suffered for him but all this will not serve thy turn if thou love any thing above him thou must give up all or thou canst not have him he will admit of no Rival he will have the prevailing degree of thy Love or thou shalt have none of him if thou prize thy life above him he will prize himself to be too good for thee 1 Cor. 13.1 2 3. for love is to him more acceptable than any Sacrifice his love to thee made him exchange Heaven for the Earth and glory for misery and will not thy love to him make thee willing to exchange Earth for Heaven and the Creature for God though a wife pretend love to her husband yet if in her husbands absence she desires not his return and refuseth to go to him 't is a sign her love is cold and she hath something else she affects above him that she hath dealt treacherously with him and placed her affections elsewhere Were thy love to thy Lord and Husband but as strong as a covetous mans love is to his Riches or an ambitious mans to his Honour or the unclean persons to his Lust thou wouldst not think a little pains too much to enjoy him for these run through the pikes of danger to obtain their end and bring about their designs and though Damnation lye in the way they will venture one and march up into the Cannons mouth and expose themselves to the everlasting destruction of Body and Soul which is a thousand times worse than death it self before they will fail in their enterprize Did but thy heart pant after God as Davids did Psal 42.1 2. thou wouldst long for the time when thou shouldst appear before God hadst thou but a believing sight of the Heavenly Canaan and its glory thou wouldst then see the worlds emptiness vanity and misery and be more senbsile of thy wilderness troubles and long to pass over this Jordan thou wouldst be more willing to leave the one and go to the other But it may be 't is not thy dispute whether Heaven or Earth be the better choice but thy own Interest that thou questionest some enjoyments thou hast here and loth thou art to leave them till thou art sure of better but hath not this been thy objection many years and hast not yet got over this stile why how hast thou spent thy time what hast thou been doing what is the result of thirty or forty years trial of the estate hadst any greater work lay upon thy hand did not God send thee into the world upon this very business and hast thou spent thy time in hunting Butter-flyes or weaving the Spiders web to catch flyes all this while how canst eat or drink or sleep in quiet without some comfortable assurance when thou knowest not but the next morning thou mayst awake with hell-flames about thy ears thou art sent to run a race to fight a fight to lay hold upon Heaven by violence and hast all this while sate idle Heaven and Earth may stand amazed at thy folly If God allow thee more time what hopes is there that thou wilt make more haste or get clearer Evidence for Heaven think not that to deny Christ thy life when he requires thâ—â—â—o lay it down for him is to gain time for better preparation nay it layes such a barr in thy way to Heaven which it is much to be feared thou wilt never remove the very thoughts of using this unlawful means to save thy life do evidence that grace is either weak or wanting in thy soul Time was thou didst carry thy life in thy hand and hold forth the contempt of the world and mad'st a shew that thou matteredst the world no more than it did thee and that thou didst believe true happiness was not to be had under the Sun and is thy judgment now altered and in thy elder dayes art thou grown more wise and by diligent search hast found out thy mistake and not only thine but the mistake of all the godly and now dost begin to grasp after the world and art loth to leave it why dost not recant in publick why dost not discover to the people thy former errour and bid them look for their happiness here Wisd 2. â— 9. and crown themselves with rose-buds before they wither let us be partakers of our wantonness let us leave some tokens of our pleasure in every place for that is our portion and this is our lot Is this the doctrine thou wouldst have others believe and the counsel thou wouldst have them take if not why dost thou give them an Example to choose thy portion here and let Christ which was thy pretended portion go and grasp after that little which the world calls Portion so greedily and why art thou so loth to go where true Treasure is to be had why dost choose to be tossed to and fro by the billows of this raging Sea and endure the tempest and storms of trouble rather than come into a safe Harbour an Heaven of rest because the mouth of it is straight and the entrance uneasie Dost thou put thy self into the case of the wicked and dost expect their portion that thou lookest upon death as thy enemy also 't is
true it wounds thy body but thy Soul is safe but it destroyes them both in body and soul and it brings more profit to the soul than dammage to the body 't is but as the prick of a pin to a dangerous Ulcer which were it not prickt would prove mortal it will put an end to thy pains and a beginning to thy Joyes for when thy life expires sin also dyes and sin and sorrow are breathed out with thy life and from this day thy Lease in Heaven bears date which shall never expire Rouse up thy self O my Soul be not dejected God minds thee no hurt Death will not cannot hurt thee Kill me they may saith the Martyr hurt me they cannot the worst they can do is but to send me to my Fathers house the sooner Many a warning thou hast had many a Corps thou hast interred many a Funeral Sermon thou hast Preached for shame say not thou hadst not sufficient warning wast thou so mad as to think of going to Heaven another way or that thou wast immortal when thou sawest so many about thee dye daily or that thou shouldst live to old age when thou sawest so many dye young and felt so many sensible Symptoms of thy approaching death thou hast as thou didst suppose some grounded hopes that thou hadst a part in the first Resurrection and that therefore the second death on thee had no power and why then is death so terrible Many have more distempers in their Souls than in their Bodies 't is true this is thy case yet thou hast hoped thine are not mortal the malignity of the disease is over when many others have Plague-Sores running upon them these may expect death and have cause to fear it it will but heal thy distempers but inrage theirs thou hast had many meditations of death and many discourses with death and you did seem pretty well agreed thou hast looked death in the face and is he now become more terrible or art thou more timerous that when he comes to thy Bed-side draws thy Curtains and shakes thee by the hand thou tremblest hath Christ done thee no good by his passion by subduing Death disarming him pulling out the sting and trampling him under foot yea laying him prostrate at thy feet hath all the pains thou hast taken in heavens way workt no more upon thee set thee up no higher where now is thy promised obedience and thy prayers Thy will be done when thou art ready to resist Gods Will when 't is manifested and preferrest thine own before it why dost call thy Father the only wise God when thou thinkest thy own wit best and that thou knowest best when 't is best for thee to dye and wilt not submit to his will and that if thou wouldst speak out thy mind is to indent with Christ this thou wilt do or Suffer but not that this sin thou wilt leave but that thou wilt not thou wouldst pick and choose thy duties and take the easiest part of it and leave the difficult dangerous and costly part undone and wilt not have heaven at so dear a rate Thou pretendest a desire to be happy and who doth not Balaam desires the death of the righteous and that his end may be like his but they will not live the righteous mans life and thou art not willing to dye his death for he is conformable to the will of God both in life and death which is that thou dost dislike O my Soul some great thing is amiss with thee thy corruptions are as strong fetters to hold thee in the Devils Slavery thy grace is weak and cannot procure thy freedom the Devil is too cunning for thee the world subtil and thy own heart deceitful to betray thee into Satans hands Oh my God this is my condition this is the estate of my Soul here lyes my distemper the world lyes too close to my heart and Christ lyes at too great a distance my corrupt deceitful heart is ever and anon puting me on to choose this for my happiness a little Grace I see will not carry me through the temptations that lye before me but Lord speak the word and grace will flourish and corruption will dye thou hast said and I believe it that thou wilt not break the bruised reed Mat. 12.20 nor quench the smoaking flax till thou bring forth Judgment unto victory Lord I believe help my unbelief and let not my little grace be lost in the great heap of the rubbish of my corruptions Lord if thou open mine eyes to see the emptiness of the creature and the fulness of Christ then shall I love the one and despise the other Psal 119.32 and shall run the ways of thy Commandments when thou shalt inlarge my heart I see no reason why I should be exempted from obeying thy Will even to the laying down of my life and though flesh and blood will not yield willing obedience to it yet 't is my resolution thus to do Lord strengthen my resolution I know my fears are the result of my Infidelity Lord strengthen my faith that I may overcome them for by thy strength I shall stand and without thy assisting grace I shall Apostatize and fall back Leave me not to my self for then I shall undo my self dishonour my God scandalize Religion bring a reproach upon the Gospel wound my Conscience break my Peace with my God and undo my Soul Luk. 9.62 Let me not O Lord now I have put my hand to the Plow look back again Nor when I have begun in the Spirit Gal. 3.3 end in the flesh Rev. 2.10 Lord make me faithful to the death and then give me a Crown of Life MEDITAT V. The World is not desirable to a Christian OH my Soul why art thou desirous to stay in the World and why so unwilling to go to thy Father The time was when thou wast otherwise minded thou lookedst upon it as Bochim a place of tears a Golgotha an unlovely habitation thou wast not willing to dwell in Meseck and in the tents of Kedar thy affections did like fire mount upward and what Load-stone hast now to draw thee back thou wast at a point with all things under the Sun and didst wear the World about thee as a loose garment ready to cast off upon all occasions and dost now spit upon thy hands and take better hold dost now set up thy Staff and with Peter say 't is good being here Art now beginning to build Tabernacles here and slight that house not made with hands but eternal in the Heavens thou didst conclude with Solomon Eccles 1.14 All is Vanity and vexation of spirit and now at last hast found some solidity 2 Pet. 2.22 art thou now returnining with the dog to his Vomit and the washed Sow to her wallowing in the Mire are the Scales of ignorance now fallen from thine eyes and dost thou see some excellency in the worlds enjoyments that before