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A20100 Vvest-vvard hoe As it hath been diuers times acted by the Children of Paules. By Tho: Decker, and Iohn Webster. Dekker, Thomas, ca. 1572-1632.; Webster, John, 1580?-1625? aut 1607 (1607) STC 6540; ESTC S109554 48,534 70

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rheume too Mouse what 's good for t Hony How often haue I tolde you you must get a patch I must hence Exit Iud. I thinke when al 's done I must follow his counsell and take a patch I haue had one long ere this but for disfiguring my face yet I had noted that a masticke patch vpon some womens Temples hath bin the very rheuwme of beauty Iust. Is he departed Is old Nestor marcht into Troy Iud. Yes you mad Greeke the Gentleman 's gone Iust. Why then clap vp coppy-bookes downe with pens hang vp inckhornes and nowe my sweete Honisuckle see what golden-winged Bee from Hybla flies humming with Crura thymo plena which he wil empty in the Hiue of your bosome Iud. From whom Iust. At the skirte of that sheete in blacke worke is wrought hys name breake not vp the wildfoule till anon and then feed vpon him in priuate there 's other irons i' th fire more sackes are comming to the Mill O you sweet temptations of the sonnes of Adam I commende you extol you magnifie you Were I a Poet by Hipocrene I sweare which was a certaine VVell where all the Muses watred and by Pernassus eke I sweare I would ●ime you to death with praises for that you can bee content to lye with olde men all night for their mony and walk to your gardens with yong men i' th day time for your pleasure Oh you delicat damnations you do but as I wud do were I the proprest sweetest plumpest Cherry-cheekt Corrall-lipt woman in a kingdome I would not daunce after one mans pipe Iud. And why Iust. Especially after an old mans Iud. And why pray Iust. Especially after an old Cittizens Iud. Still and why Iust. Marry because the Suburbes and those without the bars haue more priuiledge then they within the freedome what need one woman do ate vpon one Man Or one man be mad like Orlando for one woman Iud. Troth t is true considering how much flesh is in euery Shambles Iust. Why should I long to eate of Bakers bread onely when there 's so much Sifting and bolting and grynding in euery corner of the Citty men and women are borne and come running into the world faster then Coaches doe into Cheap-side vppon Symon and Iudes day and are eaten vp by Death faster then Mutton and porridge in a terme time Who would pin their hearts to any Sleeue this world is like a Mynt we are no sooner cast into the fire taken out agen hamerd stampt and made Currant but presently wee are changde the new Mony like a new Drab is catcht at by Dutch Spanish Welch French Scotch and English but the old crackt King Harry groates are shoueld vp feele bruzing and battring clipping and melting they smoake sort Iud. The worlds an Arrant naughty-pack I see and is a very scuruy world Iust. Scuruy worse then the conscience of a Broomeman that carryes out new ware and brings home old shoes a naughty-packe Why there 's no Minute no thought of time passes but some villany or other is a brewing why euen now now at holding vp of this finger and before the turning downe of this some are murdring some lying with their maides some picking of pockets some cutting purses some cheating some weying out bribes In this Citty some wiues are Cuckolding some Husbands In yonder Village some farmers are now-now grynding the Iawbones of the poore therefore sweete Scholler sugred Mistris Honisuckle take Summer before you and lay hold of it why euen now must you and I hatch an egge of iniquity Iud. Troth maister I thinke thou wilt proue a very knaue Iust. It s the fault of many that fight vnder this band Iud. I shall loue a Puritans face the worse whilest I liue for that Coppy of thy countenance Iust. We are all wethercocks and must follow the winde of the present from the byas Iud. Change a bowle then Iust. I will so and now for a good cast there 's the Knight sir Goson Glo-worme Iud. Hee s a Knight made out of waxe Iust. He tooke vp Silkes vppon his bond I confesse nay more hee s a knight in print but let his knight-hood be of what stamp it will from him come I to intreate you and Mistris Wafer and mistris Tenterhook being both my schollers and your honest pew fellowes to meet him this afternoon at the Rhenesh-wine-house i th Stillyard Captaine Whirlepoole will be there young Lynstock the Alder-mans Son and Heire there too will you steale forth tast of a Dutch Bun and a Keg of Sturgeon Iud. What excuse shall I coyne now Iust. Few excuses You must to the pawne to buy Lawne to Saint Martins for Lace to the Garden to the Glasse-house to your Gossips to the Powlters else take out an old ruffe and go to your Sempsters excuses Why they are more ripe then medlers at Christmas Iud. I le come The hower Iust. Two the way-through Paules euery wench take a piller there clap on your Maskes your men will bee behind you and before your prayers be halfe don be before you man you out at seuerall doores You le be there Iud. If I breath Exit Iud. Farewell So now must I goe set the tother Wenches the selfe same Coppy A rare Scholemaister for all kind of handes I Oh What strange curses are powred downe with one blessing Do all tread on the heele Haue all the art to hood-winke wise men thus And like those builders of Babels Tower to speake vnknowne tongues Of all saue by their husbands vnderstood Well if as Iuy bout the Elme does twine All wiues loue clipping there 's no fault in mine But if the world lay speechles euen the dead Would rise and thus cry out from yawning graues Women make men or Fooles or Beasts or Slaues Exit Scaena 2. Enter Earle and Mistris Birdlime Earle Her answer talke in musick Wil she come Bird. Oh my sides ake in my loines in my bones I ha more need of a posset of sacke and lie in my bed and sweate than to talke in musick no honest woman would run hurrying vp down thus and vndoe her selfe for a man of honour without reason I am so lame euery foot that I set to the ground went to my hart I thoght I had bin at Mum-chance my bones ratled so with iaunting had it not bin for a friend in a corner Takes Aqua-vitae I had kickt vp my heeles Earl Minister comfort to me Wil she come Bird. All the Castles of comfort that I can put you into is this that the iealous wittal her husband came like a mad Oxe belowing in whilst I was ther Oh I ha lost my sweet breth with trotting Earl Death to my hart her husband What saith he Bird. The freeze-lerkin Rascal out with his purse and cal'd me plaine Bawd to my face Earl Affliction to me then thou spak'st not to her Bird. I spake to her as Clients do to Lawiers without money to no purpose but I le