so cause me to feed on digest improve his body and blood having the same expectation of Spiritual and Eternal life from him that I have of temporal life from my food Let me eat not only the Bread of the Lord but the Bread which the Lord that as by my senses I receive â—he Elements to my Corporal so by faith 〈◊〉 may receive and apply him to my Spiriâ—â—al nourishment Let the Ordinance be a â—â—vely resemblance remembrance and â—pplication of the sufferings and earnest of the Supper of the Lamb. Let Christ be 〈◊〉 lively set forth as if Crucified before by eyes dying for me that beholding â—mbracing and even putting my fingers â—nto the print of his nails and feet and â—hrusting my hand into his side so fully â—erswaded of his suffering for me that I â—â—ay not be faithless but believing saying â—y Lord and my God he loved me and â—ave himself for me my beloved is mine â—nd I am his O that I may so touch him â—s may find and feel strength peace virâ—ue come from him and be healed of all â—â—y uncleanness that they may not be â—nto death but unto the glory of thy â—ercyâ— in pardoning and grace in purifying 〈◊〉 polluted a Wretch That it may be he food the feast of my graces the poiâ—â—on the funeral of my corruptions Let â—â—e so feed on his blessed Bodie and bathe â—â—y soul in his pretious Blood that my Soul may magnifie the Lord and mâ—â— Spirit rejoyce in God my Saviour whoâ—â— having not seen I may love in whâ—â— though now I see him not yet believing 〈◊〉 may rejoyce with joy unspeakable and fuâ—â— of glory Circumcise my Heart to loâ—â— thee with all my Soul Love and witâ— all my strength Let my hearâ— be ravisht with this infinite merciâ—â— in thee to sinful miserable man in cotriving and giving so glorious a Reddeemer and Redemption to save him and now in presenting us with such special Seals of his love and admitting uâ—â—â— into so near so holy a Communion 〈◊〉 For this let me be dissolv'd into lovâ— to thee and thy Son and to man foâ— his sake and into a steadfast vow of lifâ— and death to thy service that I will give and forgive do and suffer any thing foâ— thee Let me be fill'd with holy raptures joys and hopes in so great a goodness who having done this will deâ—â— me nothing and maugre the rage and malice of hell not see my soul lost foâ— whom all this is done Oh let me meet with strong endearments of Affections melting and flowing over toâ—ards thee languishing with desires enjoy thee even turn'd into made 〈◊〉 of love for thee that I may be the â—isciple whom thou lovest and laid in â—y bosom Oh deal with me as thou â—ften dost with those that draw near to â—â—ee though I burn not with so hot a â—ame yet through thy grace I crave it â—f thee that I may participate with â—nd be numbred among such fervent â—overs If I cannot say I am sick of Love â—et am sick that I cannot love thee â—here wilt thou give me thy love â—dmission to more familiar fellowship â—earâ—r manifestation sensible feeling â—nd assurance of thy love and affectiâ—n unto me that I am beloved of â—hee Give me grace to love the Lord â—esus in sincerity let him dwell in my â—eart by Faith and Love that being â—â—oted and grounded in Love I may be â—ble to comprehend with all Saints â—hat is the breadth and length and â—epth and heighth and to know the â—ove of Christ which passes knowledge â—hat the remembrance of him may pierce â—e with grief transport me with love captivate my will engage all my affections to him and for him And let me knoâ— I am passed from death to life because love the Brethren Shed abroad thâ— love in my cold frozen heart and inflaâ—â— it with fervent affection to thee and thing While my love is burning towards thâ— self oh how can it chuse but be imparâ—â— to thy Friends who sincerely love theâ— and on whom thou hast set thy heart arâ—shed thy love thy spirit whereby the are made like unto thee They mâ—â— needs be lovely in my eyes to whoâ— Christ is pretious Oh let me not conâ—â— to this Love-feast with a bitter but chanâ—â— table spirit Purge out therefore tâ—â— old leven of malice which will sow the Ordinance to me Oh that our Fâ—ther in Heaven may look down upon 〈◊〉 children feasting together in mutual loâ—â— and delight in the remembrance of 〈◊〉 that love he hath shewn us and joyâ—â— expectation of what further he hath pâ—â—mised to us Let me not sit sad aâ— dejected Joy and Thanksgiving as if I liked 〈◊〉 the provision or though my self not welcom Maâ—â— this real magnificent solemn sumptuous Feast these Celestial Viands wherewith thou feedest thy people by thy gracious comfortable discoveries of thy self a spiritual banquet unto my soul a feast of fat things a feast of wine on the lees of fat things full of marrow of wine on the lees well refin'd Do not onely stand and knocks but open the door of my heart vouchsafe to come in and abide with me that there may be a chearful comfortable converse sup with me and let me sup with thee that I may be abundantly satisfied with the fatness of thy house feel and find abundance of soul-satisfaction reached out to me in the Ordinance and do thou make me drink of the River of thy pleasure quench my thirst after carnal and let me be fill'd with Divine pleasures ravishments and contentments flowing from the inexhaustible fountain of Divine plentie Let my soul be satisfied as with marrow and fatness and my mouth praise thee with joyful lips Let me come before thee with thanksgiving and praise thee with my whole heart Let there be Angels work at Angels food make me joyful in thy house of prayer By and for him let me offer the Sacrifice of Praise to God the fruit of my lips giving thanks unto his Name in the great Congregation and Praise thee among much People Thou art ready to give bread to the hungry to fill them with good things Spiritual Thirst and the water of life to him that is athirst Thou art not straitned in thy self but I am straitned in my own bowels the desire and the meat the necessity and relief are all from thee Oh thou that providest Food give also a stomach bid and make me welcom say eat oh Friend drink yea drink abundantly oh Beloved Oh create and stir up in me earnest longings and a Spiritual appetite that I may come to be made partaker of the good things thou hast prepared for me with enlarged affections and longing desires after answerable to my need of the Ordinance and Christ offered in it as full nourishment for my Soul under the forms of Bread and Wine and with strong expectations to receive him and his benefits with desire let me desire to eat this Passeover
sins oh that none of you might escape here that ye may all lye bleeding as so many Sacrifices at the Altar of my Lord oh let them now feel the weight and sharpness of thy Cross here let them be slain at thy foot that I may not carry away one of them alive How can my Heart refrain from tears of sorrow and joy to think of its unkindness and of his strange love what heart can be so hard as without pain to think we love him no more who put himself to such pains for us Oh how am I troubled that my heart should be so cold when his was so hot with love as to send forth its life-blood for my Redemption and yet when I consider that in this stream of blood my sinful Soul is washed and that by his stripes I am healed that instead of sin and death and Hell deserved Righteousness and life and Heaven is purchased how can I chuse but rejoyce in his love and hope he will accept of my poor acknowledgement who so pardons as might even melt the hardest heart and for ever silence and satisfie it by the love of God and sufficiency of the Sacrifice Oh how am I ravished therewith I am justified by Faith and at peace with God the flames of Hell shall never touch me Death is swallowed up in victory I am consigned to a blessed immortality But oh my Lord I take the boldness to complain unto thee and expostulate with thee how sayest thou that thou lovest me if thou discover thy self no more unto me if I have no more love unto thee no more life from thee if I be so barren and unfruitful towards thee so dull and cold in thy service so unwilling to execute thy commands so weak and unable against assaults if thou be with me who can be against me what can be too hard for me what cannot be done by me through thee O! since it is thy pleasure to be so familiar with me if thou lovest me so much fulfil in me all the good pleasure of thy will and the work of Faith with power Oh let the merit of Christ's death free me from the guilt upon me and his Spirit cleanse me from the stains within me Let holiness to the Lord be written upon my whole Soul and Body that they may be a delectable habitation for thee unite my heart unto thee transform me altogether in thee I put my self out of my own power I accept of and close with thee as my Maker and Preserver Lord and Sovereign Priest and Prophet King and Captain Head and Husband to be ordered disposed provided for by thee I give my hearty consent that thou shouldest dwell within me as the alone Prince of my soul the possession of it I for ever surrender up unto thee I cease to be my own I renounce the Devil the World and the Flesh I profess my acceptance of submission to to place my happiness in and to resign my self wholly unto thee to be provided for disposed of led saved by theē Oh how am I pleased with my choice that I have parted with my self and am become thine How am I beholden to thee that I may give my self unto thee that thou hast brought me into the Bond of the Covenant Oh come dear Redeemer to the price of thy own blood cease thine own and save me assist and strengthen me feed and preserve me never leave me nor forsake me The Cup. COme my beloved now I have drunk thy Cup of wrath pledge me in this Cup of Salvation for which I pierc'd my side I drew this wine on purpose for thee when I trod the wine-press of my Fathers wrath alone This Cup is the New Testament in my blood is a pledge of signifies and represents by representation is my bloud in which the New Testament between God and Man is founded and established confirmed and ratified and by which remission of sins and all other consequent blessings of the New Covenant are purchased It s glorious liberties and immunities I hereby sign and seal unto you a full release and discharge from all your debts from the house of bondage sin the grave and hell Here I deliver yon your Protection from all your Enemies will I save you from the Arrests of the Law from the powers of darkness from the victory of the world from the curse of the Cross none shall prove too hard for you all shall work good unto you I hereby confer upon and instate you in all its royal priviledges and prerogatives behold I give my self to you to be your God and instead of all relations I will be a Friend and Physician a Shepherd Sovereign and Husband unto you to espouse your interest to counsel and heal you to feed and comfort you to watch over and defend you Lo I make over my self to you in all my Essential perfections mine omnipotency shall be your guard my omnisciency your overseer my omnipresence your companion my mercy your store my wisdom your counsellor my justice your revenger and rewarder my holiness a fountain of grace unto you my sovereignty to be commanded by you my infiniteness and all-sufficiency the lot and extent of your inheritance my Faithfulness unchangeableness the rock of your rest and security my eternity the date of your happiness I will be yours in all my personal relations a Father unto you what would my Children have of your Fathers instruction and probation protection and provision care and ear bread and rod heart and house pity and compassion I here assure you my Son and Spirit I give you to cloath and teach you assist and comfort you intercede in and for you sanctifie and save you with my self I give you all things mine Angels for your guardians and attendants my Word and Ordinances Ministers and providences for your guide and good Whether Paul or Apollo or Cephas or the World or life or death or things present or things to come all are yours And that you may know I am in earnest lo I establish my Covenant with yon ordered in all things and sure written in the blood founded in the all-sufficient merits of your surety in whom I am well-pleased whose death made this Testament unchangeable for ever so that your name can never be blotted out nor your inheritance alienated nor your legacies diminished nothing can be altered I here solemnly deliver it to you as my Act and Deed sealed with the Oath and Blood of God who engages here his own Body for security Come ye blessed fear not the donation is free and full I have received a ransom and expect only you believe know and accept of your own blessedness Here are the conveyances see the seals take the writings behold the blood of the Covenant receive the instruments of your salvation This I give you as a pledge of my love and of the truth of all I have promised I hereby plight you my troth and set to my hand
of an ungrateful world was so mindful of your good and comfort to arm establish and refresh you and will you neglect dis-esteem contemn it doth not the benefit of my passion without your desert plead for the constant meditation of it without your scandal The frequent faithful remembrance of what I did and suffered for you is my chief request and your only requital and yet do you distaste what I â—mbraced and endure not to think of what I refused not to endure loath you the cup of Salvation that cost me a cup of Astonishment Have I left the Glory of my Father to be cloathed with and dwell in flesh Led a life of suffering undergone a shameful painful accursed death rose again ascended prepared mansions taken possession for you where I plead your cause and will come ere long to absolve you before all the world and with whom you shall be for ever Have I given such costly evidences of my love unto you and love you not to do this in remembrance of me Do But for thee dear Saviour I had been for ever undone for thee then and for thy sake what is it that I should not do Thy desires are my Injunctions there 's Authority enough in thy love to do thy pleasure Since thou would have no nature but mine I will have no will but thine When once signified by command upon my obligation I should upon my Fealty to thee the King of the Church and Soveraign as well as Saviour of my Soul I ought I may I must not dispute nor delay I dare not but must Do else how must I be look'd upon when the King commands all his loving Subjects to take the Oath of Allegiance and I stay away and refuse Do I not publickly disown him for my Soveraign who hath enjoyn'd the Celebration of this as an evidence and symbol of my Relation to and communion with him Is not this appointed for a memorial of his death whereby he delivered his people and destroyed their enemies transcendently to us what the Passeover was to the Jews and the neglect of it more provoking yet the man that is unclean and is not in a journey and forbeareth to keep the Passeover at the time appointed when he might and ought eat it even the same soul shall be cut off from his people because he brought not the offering of the Lord in his appointed season that man shall bear his sin There 's a punishment annexed to the neglect as well as ill performance of it he that eats irreverently is guilty of prophaning the Lords Body and he that eats not of despising it and of preferring his lusts before him the one eats damnation to himself and the other by not eating judges himself to be in a damnable State 'T is dangerous staying in that condition wherein we judge our selves unmeet society for Christ if I cannot partake of his Supper here how can I think my self fit to feast with him in Heaven or hope to look on his face with comfort there and take no pleasure to behold remember come near have any thing to do with him here will not his presence be most terrible then to whom his memory is no way delightful now Am I troubled for neglect of other duties and not of this when Christs Items at the last day are made up of sins of omission Dare I pick and chuse when whosoever shall keep the whole Law yet offend in one point is guilty of all This Not to climb a Cross or undergo a bitter passion for thy sake I should not think much to do that who hast done so much more for me Not to be had to a Scaffold but to come to thy Table not to go to Slaughter but a Feast not to Bleed or Burn but to Eat and Drink and that not Bread of Affliction or Water of Adversity which flags the Spirit but such Bread and Wine as confirms and comforts my Heart Not a Mourners Bread Tears or a Martyrs Cup Blood but a Saviours fare Blessed Wine and Bread yea in them what both is and makes blessed his body and blood meat and drink bread of life and well of life that both joys my heart and saves my soul Didst thou on the Cross drink Vinegar made infinitely more tart by my sins for me and shall not I at thy Table drink Wine for my self made infinitely sweeter with the blood it conveys Didst thou drink a Cup of wrath and shall not I drink the cup of Blessing Eat the bread of affliction and shall not I eat the bread of life suffer thy passion and shall not I enjoy it Didst thou stretch out thy hands on the Cross and shall mine be withered and shrunk towards thy Table Hadst thou bid me do some great thing for procuring so great a good that there had been between the service and reward no disproportion should I not endeavour'd to do it how much more when thou bidst me eat and live I am not saved but by thy Body I shall be damned without thy Blood Didst thou offer them for me on the Cross and shall I not take the pledge from thee at thy Supper Dost thou give me a Title to them and shall I bar my self of possession rob my self of thy mercy and my right of no less then the price of my Redemption Dost thou give me the purchase in thy Blood and shall I deny my self the Seal in thy Church Dare I be guilty of so great a Robbery and Rebellion to violate thy will and seal to steal at once thy Bread and Cup and Scepter against thy express Will and Testament to take the Bread and Cup out of my own hand and the Scepter out of thine to deprive my soul of thy Body and Blood and thee of thy Authority by thy grace I will never but observe as thou appointest If this be thy command O Saviour I am a Rebel as much to my good as thy Law a damned Rebel if I do not this In Remembrance I blush Lord to see my self need thy memento Have I a room for the trash of the world and none for thee memory for what I list and none for what I should O thou that hast so done thy marvellous works that they ought to be had in everlasting remembrance whose name is wonderful and all thy works as thy name and this above all thy works can I ever forget thee can I forget my self so much that breaths not a moment on Earth or out of Hell without thee If I forget thee O Saviour let my tongue cleave to the roof of my mouth If I remember not thee let my right hand forget her cunning Sure that harp had never known the tune of joy nor hand to do with harp hadst not thou put a world all out in order again and set all in tune And is that all when I owe a thousand lives unto thee to require not my Body but my Mind to say Remember not to Dye
Search my Soul so to the bottom that none of my wounds may fester but be all discovered and cured consider from whence I am fallen before and since the last Communion and repent and O that I may be so sensible of my sin and misery that I may be truly apprehensive of and thankful for infinite love and mercy I dare not presume to compass thine Altar most holy Lord before I have washed my hands in Innocency and purified my heart by Repentance and Faith in the blood of my Redeemer I will now therefore call my sins to remembrance and set them in order before mine eyes and remember mine own evil ways and my doings which have not been good and loath my self in my own sight for my iniquities and for my abominations O I am not able to reckon up or remember my innumerable breaches of thy most holy Commandments The 1. By not knowing acknowledging thinking remembring chusing believing esteeming adoring loving desiring fearing obeying of trusting joying in acquainting my self with not demeaning my self towards thee as God and my God but preferring sin self Satan the world any thing before thy self The 2. By mis-apprehensions gross conceits of thee not setting my whole delight in reposing all my confidence on expecting all my happiness from addressing all my complaints prayers praises unto thee not worshipping thee as to manner and means agreeable to thy word The 3. By not acknowledging or effectually remembring and delighting to speak of thee as I have had occasion to make thy praise glorious or doing it irreverently dealing falsly in my Covenant with thee not vindicating thy Honour not grieving for thy Dishonour weariness of thy commands non-observance distrust misapplication of thy providences unthankfulness for great mercies dejection impatience under small crosses insensibleness incorrigibleness under judgments and afflictions not using thy Name Attributes Ordinances Works every thing whereby thou may'st be known as is required The 4. By unmindfulness beforehand to prevent or avoid whatsoever might distract in the duties of the Sabbath not preparing my self not resting from needless thoughts words actions mis-spending it in idleness and vanity not performing publick and private duties of Prayer Reading Hearing Examination wheting thy Law upon my heart and others contemplating thy Word and Works with that care reverence sincerity spirtualness profit delight as I ought not calling the Sabbath a Delight Holy of the Lord Honorable The 5. By not behaving my self answerable to my several Relations with all due reverence and respect to my Natural Ecclesiastical Political Parents in heart word behaviour prayer thanksgiving for Superiours covering their infirmities in love not admonishing and encouraging Inferiours in well-doing not by a grave wise holy exemplary carriage procuring glory to thee and preserving the honour and authority thou hast put upon me not regarding the dignity and worth of my Equals or rejoycing in their gifts advancement prosperity as my own The 6. By sinful anger hatred secret grudges injurious thoughts excessive passions distracting cares immoderate use of diet labour rest recreation reviling saddening provoking grieving speeches falling short in maintaining mutual Friendship and in following peace with all men sowing discord among Brethren concealing their dangers unprofitable conversation quenching suppressing holy suggestions preferring things of time before eternity or by whatsoever may tend not to the health but prejudice of my own or others Soul or Bodies not weeping with them that weep being sensless hard-hearted unaffected at publick evils and others miseries The 7. By unchaste thoughts purposes affections looks company words actions or listening to them not labouring to quench my fleshly concupisence by watching over my senses heart and ways not shunning all occasions to or acts of uncleanness in or with my self or others not keeping my bodie and soul from all filthiness of flesh and spirit but making my heart a cage of impure thoughts my mind a stie of the unclean spirit The 8. By unbecoming arts in Bargaining not dealing with others as I would men should with me not endeavouring by all just means to procure preserve and further the welfare of others as well as my own withholding good from them to whom it was due suffering Christ to stand at and go away from my door hungry cold naked succourless and when the leanness of his cheeks pleaded pitie the hardness of my heart would shew no compassion The 9. By slandering backbiting detracting reviling harsh flattering misconstruing discouraging sinister intentions words and actions listening to and spreading the faults of others not charitable in my thoughts and speeches to them not freely acknowledging their gifts and graces not readily receiving a good report but willingly admitting an evil one not discouraging tale-bearers flatterers slanderers not loving desiring rejoycing in caring for defending and upholding their good name not sorrowing for and covering their infirmities but practising or not avoiding my self or not hindring what I can in others such things as raise jealousies and suspicions procure an ill name to my self or others The 10. By self-love evil thoughts covetousness inordinate prizing and affecting distrustful distracting solicitous care and study in getting keeping or using temporal things discontent with my own estate envying and grieving at my neighbours unlawful motions and affections to things that are his And to these I have added multitudes of sins against the Gospel by not as I ought labouring to acquaint my self with it Ignorance flighting of not sufficiently esteeming admiring thankful for that infinite love in my Redemption not loving rejoycing in Christ and him Crucified relying on owning of him in all his Offices accounting all things loss and dung for him not taking that pains I ought to know him and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of his sufferings and to be made conformable to his death if by any means I might attain unto the resurrection of the dead and be made perfect as my Father in Heaven is perfect Not claiming his promises as my heritage nor esteeming them the joy of my heart and as unsearchable riches exceeding great and precious not believing prizing embracing of hoping waiting for the good of them with so much readiness and steadfastness as their excelcellency and certainty requires and applying them as I ought to this and the next life not careful they have their due effects on my Soul in making me partaker of the divine nature not dying daily to sin nor acting growing in grace and in the knowledge of Christ not thirsting after righteousness and that poor mournful meek merciful pure Spirit that shall be blessed not confessing but being ashamed of Christ before men and my relation to him not denying my self taking up my Cross and following him Not doing all things to the glory of God nor rejoycing in him always Not receiving not doing the good nor improving time mercies judgments forein perturbations national discontents and divisions irreligious confusions domestick distinguishing favours as I ought Strangeness
among worse as well as died among â—hieves Blessedness is made not earth â—nely but wo to bring earth from wo to â—lessedness Behold him now O my soul hanging â—pon the Cross and thy sins putting him â—nto that gore saying Weep not for me â—hat endures it but weep for your selves â—hat causes it read in me the cruelty of â—our sins see how barbarously they have â—sed me how miserably I am torn and wounded by you how many thorns in this Crown of thorns are your sins how my blood with my warmest love runs out to fetch you home to God Oh my head my side my hands and my feet Look through these gaping wounds into my heart pierc'd first by love and then by a spear for you Was ever any sorrow or love like unto mine Can I do more then die for you Will you not be perswaded what an evil and bitter thing sin is unto me Do you not see how it rakes into my side and tears my very heart how greedily it sucks my blood Behold the pits it diggeth the very print of its nails see the very place where it hath thrust its spear Canst thou hug and embrace bloody Parricides shew any kindness to so deadly an enemy harbour them that have used me thus You say You are my friends will you not take my part against them Have not all these wounds mouths enough to persvvade you to fall out vvith sin Would you have me used thus again Could you find in your heart to see me once more upon a Gibbet Will you tear open my wounds crucifie me afresh Else why can you not be prevail'd with by this sight Why do you not spit in the face of your sins do all the despight you can unto revenge me perfectly upon them â—ail them unto my Cross if you would have me embrace you O how ought my Adamantine heart to rend in pieces when all thy tortures and grones are for are from us And yet as if once were not sufficient how often do we joyn with those that crucifie thee afresh By hypocrisie we bend the knee with ludibrious devotion saying Hail King of the Jews By presumption we put a Reed in thy hand We smite and buffet thee with the works of darkness saying Prophesie who smote thee By Prophaneness we spit in thy face the filth of our rotten hearts By Sacriledge we cast lots for thy garments By Schism we divide thy seamless Coat which the rude Soldiers did not By popularity we wash our hands as innocent and to please men condemn thee By unhallowed cups we give thee gall to drink By Superstition betray thee vvith a kiss and despise thee vvith seeming honour By Apostacy deny forswear thee By Heresie rack and disjoynt thee By the roareâ— laughs and scoffs oaths and blasphemies tear and rend thee By any common sin we prefer Barabba before thee O weâ—â— thy pains so light that we must every day redouble them Is this the kindness the entertainment thou deservest the recompence of thine inestimable love thus cruelly to vex and wound thee O how can we hope to find Redemption by thy Blood while we continue by our horrid crimes to make new gashes in thy side to rub thy wounds afresh and cause them to stream anew that were even closed up before an act more Jewish then the Jews Oh! I sigh unto thee for want of grief for thy grievous sufferings Oh that I could turn my self into tears that I might wash the wounds I have made seeing thou diedst for my sins how ought I to despise my self who have so cruelly offended and tormented thee the very party whose offences have brought those miserable torments and death upon thee Oh how must this needs irreconcile and engage me to pursue them to death that in the eye of all the world brought so great shame and pain and amazement on the Lord of Life and Glory Come along with me Oh ye vile ye sinful passions and corrupt affections into his presence if ye dare live so long and there receive your mortal wound from him Methinks you should begin to die at the very thoughts of a dying Redeemer and swoun away at the sight of yonder Blood and not stay till you come to his Cross but give up the Ghost before you see but the image his death do you not feel the power of it afar off doth not his pierced side pierce your heart before you behold it Oh ye bloody things what have ye done what wounds have you made in the Bodie of my Lord lay your necks quietly on the block prepare your selves for death which is approaching nay never struggle nor resist think not to live any longer for I have vow'd you in sacrifice to him And now what remains Ends in going but that I renew a quick and lively sense of the ends of this Rite and of mine in going and what lies hid under the Ceremonie Oh my Soul whither art thou going What is that Table which I see yonder spread for us and what is thy chief design in going to it what means that broken bread that is provided for vvhat end vvas that body Crucified do men use to drink a cup of Blood Oh let me knovv the bottom of this mysterie let me enter into this secret and my ovvn heart's Renouncing my own Righteousness and Preparation in his name merits mediation strength and righteousness in obedience to thy command and thy follovvers practice to renevv my Covenant vvith thee to commemorate and be affected vvith his death to ovvn and encrease my Spiritual Union and Communion vvith him and his members to further my joy in the Holy Ghost peace of Conscience and hopes of Eternal Life for the nourishment of my Soul to get povver against my sins to act and excite and strengthen my graces to make fresh applications of his blood to have the Covenant of Grace vvith all its blessings sealed unto me I go unto thy Table O stir up in me thirsting desires after strong expectations to receive these blessed ends and benefits and do thou make them good unto me Oh how weak To strengthen my Inner man how imperfect are my Graces I see and know but in part so love obey believe but in part Oh how many temptations adversaries difficulties assault me How seldom have I a will to do good and when I would do good evil is present with me All I have â—an or am is from thee so due unto thee but all still unworthy of thee yet how heart-bound is that little all of service I do thee I pray as if afraid to be heard bear as if unwilling to be saved communicate as if loth to receive thee serve thee as if I would not please thee To that end I go to the Lords Supper sutable and sufficient to nourish my inner man where â—re rendred most familiarly and effectually his Flesh and Blood meat and drink indeed Oh that I may have such â—xpectations of
hath purchas'd for us a Kingdom hath thrown in stored up all necessaries for our passage thither maintenance for his Heirs while they come to Age. He will not neglect his members not starve his own Body He will refresh the weary Pilgrim furnish and supply us with provision to serve us by the way till we come home to himself How shall he refuse our prayers for any thing now we are united to his person our souls joyned to and nourished by his body sanctified by his blood and cloathed with his robes marked w th his character sealed with his spirit renewed with his vows consigned to his glory adopted to his inheritance when we represent his death and pray in vertue of his passion and imitate his intercession and do that he commands take Christ along with us in our arms and offer him he essentially loves He that spared not his own Son but delivered him up for us all how shall he not with him freely give us all things The Communion Close BUt here is no continuing Banquet Oh how unwillingly do I rise How Ioth am I to go hence me thinks I could sit here and feast my self for ever Oh what running Banquets my Lord affords me sure he need not fear I should surfeit on himself or be weary of his company Oh! what shall I do in yonder unsatisfying Sould-starving World I have been feeding on my Paschal Lamb and now must I to my sower Herbs again If it be his will I must obey but oh take me by the hand lead and uphold-me be still by me let me see thee always with me I know thou hast prepared the endless Feast above where I shall ever lye in thy bosom under the uninterrupted beams of thy smiling and all-cheering Countenance and glut my hungry Soul on the Banquet of thy ever blessed self In comparison of which I now rather Fast then Feast and enjoy but drops of the river of pleasure an antipast of the Eternal Supper a Vigil of the Eternal Rest where my Appetite shall be satisfied and my thirst quenched in the Ocean it self where I shall see thee in thy Glory and be ravisht in the sight of thy beauty and drink of those overflowing joys streaming from the light of thy ever-blessed face Where Body and Soul shall be subject to no corruption imperfection or decay nor stand in need of such Viaticums to support us in our way Where the vail of our mortality shall be rent our mud-wall of flesh made spiritual and transparent the shadows and resemblances abolished the glass removed the riddle of our Salvation unfolded the vapours of corruption dispelled the patience of our expectation rewarded where from the power of the Spirit within and presence of Christ without there shall be diffused on the whole man a double lustre of that exceeding abundant Glory This ordinance is a Type of that Eternal Feast the feeding on his Body a pledge of seeing his face the same company there and Christ in the middest of them when he shall gird himself and make us to sit down at meat and come forth and serve us Oh the dignity the comfort of those servants who have infinite delight Majesty it self condescending to serve them at the Table for the Guests to have him set himself to solace them who is infinite in sweetness and knowledge to make his sweetness please them whose bosom is the hive and centre of all goodness in which all the scattered parcels of blessedness are bundled up But alass as yet I am on Earth and have my work to do too too toilsom and heavy for me scarcely should I have lasted out so long but that at such seasons as this he repairs my finking Spirit by pouring in the Cardials of his Blood the comforts of his Spirit Oh little did I think to be thus much made of or minded by him who is taken up with the attendance and praises of his Heavenly Host my conscience would have kept me away but he call'd me to him ran to meet me and took me in his arms and rebuked my timorous Spirit saying wherefore didst thou fear I call'd my self Prodigal a companion of Swine a miserable hard-hearted wretch no more worthy to be called his Son or Servant he called me Child and chid me for questioning his love He hath readily forgiven me those sins I thought would have made my Soul the fuel of Hell He hath put on me the best Robe his Sons righteousness a ring on my hand honoured adorned me with the riches the seals pleges of his love and Shoos on my feet prepared armed firmly fetled me to go throughout all the difficuties of a rugged way by enabling me to believe the Gospel of Peace and Attonement He hath killed the Fatted Calf for me instead of mingling my Blood with my Sacrifice and entertain'd me with Joy with musick and with Feasting when I better deserv'd to have been howling among the Dogs without the door then a crum at his table He hath embraced me in his sustaining Consolatory arms when he might have spurn'd my guilty Soul to Hell saying depart from me I know you not Oh! how shall I mention the loving-kindness praises of the Lord according to his mercy according to the multitude of his loving kindness according to all he hath bestow'd on me and his great goodnesse to the house of Israel Oh that I could proclaim thy love to all the world and make the whole earth ring with thy praises and awake every creature to do it with me Oh that I could laud him with the Celestial Quire and joyn my heart and voice with the spirits of just men made perfect To him who hath created a whole world so large beautiful and magnificent to serve us subjected so fair a Territory to our Dominion consign'd to our use so numerous a race of goodly Creatures to be manag'd enjoyed governed by us To him who hath endued our Bodies so fearfully wonderfully curiously made with Souls resembling his excellent perfections in Knowledge Righteousness and true Holiness capable or serving and enjoying him affording to that end all convenient instructions encouragements and assistances To him that supplies our manifold needs protects us from innumberable dangers gives us whatsoever is necessary convenient and pleasant for our use sustenance and delights accepts our acknowledgments of former Blessings as arguments and opportunities of conferring fresh ones who might utterly cast us off when we threw off our obedience and long ago have san'd us as chart from off the face of the earth by the breath of his nostrils into unquenchable fire To him who remembred us in our low estate when we had lost his Image and favour our excellency and happiness descended from his imperial throne took upon him our shape conversed as it were upon equal terms with us to assume us into a nearer affinity submitting to our choice Crowns that cannot fade Scepters that cannot be extorted from us To
wedding Garment stain it by any pollution or seek after other lovers eat his Bread and lift up the heel against him take the Cup and betray my interest in him after I have receiv'd him cast him out of my heart live in that for which he died As the Sacrament is a memorial of Christ Crucifyed for sin let it be a remembrance to me of abhorring crucifying abstaining from it Else I hold on Satan's side seek to keep him on his throne do those things which Christ is more unwilling I should then he was to suffer all the indignities and torments the Jews inflicted he was willing to dye by their hands rather then any inconveniency should fall upon me then sin and Satan should reign over and keep possession in me he was not troubled so much to dye as he was to see me live in sin for he dyed that I might cease from sin And do I dispute when a temptation is presented whether Christ or Barrabbas shall be preferred my lusts denyed or my Lord Crucifyed that which would murther my Soul deserve to be spared or he that suffered to save it Oh how sad that he who seems to deifie Christ in the Eucharist should vilifie him in his members that such who pretend to eat and drink Christ's Body and Blood at the Church should eat the bread of wickedness and drink the wine of violence in their own houses that they should be so devout at the Sacrament as if they believed God to be in the Bread and in their lives so prophane as if they believed not God to be in Heaven Abandon and Crucifie all sin more then ever I have put off my coate of corruption how shall I put it on I have washed my feet in the blood of the Lamb how shall I defile them the Lord hath spoken peace unto me let me not return again to folly Hath he taken off my former burthen and cast it on the back of his dear Son and shall I lay more load upon him hath he loved me and washed me from my sins in his own blood and shall I with the dog return to the vomit with the sow that is washed to her wallowing in mire shall I take poyson after Physick make the Table of the Lord contemptible Hath he been so gracious to me as to vouchsafe and seal me a pardon of all my sins and shall I so abuse his goodness so turn his grace into wantonness as to run afresh on his score is not this to account the blood of the Covenant wherewith I am sanctified an unholy thing may I not fear his anger will kindle against me and that he will no more have mercy on me Oh let not those hands that were reach'd forth to receive Christ be stretched out to oppression and violence but be hence forth sacred and do no deed that may offend thee nor those lips that have touched those holy Mysteries be defiled with the Devils drivel filthy communication but be hallow'd from all words that may displease thee Oh let my Soul which by thy Sacrament is made so happy as to be so near to be never so wretched as to think any thing too dear for such a Saviour Let nothing make me leave my first love who for love of me left his Father and country Heaven and glory to espouse me Frequently consider the engagement thou hast hereby laid upon thy self No space of time can wear it off to the same strictness all our days as this though we had but this one opportunity to receive The Bonds my Soul is entered into will never be cancell'd God forgets not his promises nor my breaches though I may the matter is now out of my hands I cannot revoke this gift of my self to God indeed I have given nothing but what was his own before after these vows there is no enquiry to be made whether they should be kept This day I have avouched the Lord to be my God to walk in his ways and to keep his statutes and he hath avouched me to be one of his people I have taken Christ for my Lord and Husband to live in love and obedience to him as I hope to be saved by him Tempt me not therefore from my loyalty and allegeance the vows of God are upon me seald at the Sacrament and recorded in Heaven not one of my Fellow Communicants but are witnesses with and to God that they saw me personally publickly own and renew my Covenant with him for my Oath sake and those that sat with me I will not do this evill and sin against God Shall I alienate and pollute the heart so solemnly devoted to him break those bands asunder and fetch the Sacrifice away from the Altar tyed with such strong cords of Oaths and Covenants must I not expect to bring fire along with it to provoke God to a severe revenge of the mocks and scorns I put upon him shall I so horribly prophane his name and make my self such a forsworn perjur'd wretch Is it a light thing to break an Oath made solemnly with God shall he escape that doth such things or shall he break the Covenant and be delivered As I live saith the Lord surely my Oath which he hath despised and my Covenant which he hath broken even it I will recompense on his own head I am sure he will be true to his promises and shall I fall under his threatnings by being false to mine If a good man keep his Oaths and promises with men to his own hurt much more ought be those to God for his own good Walk on in the strength of this spiritual Food till thou comest to perfection Oh that I may still drink of the Spiritual Rock find the efficacy vertue and benefit of the Sacrament follow and stream after me while I travel in this Wilderness O that I may be stronger and stronger in all Graces more active and exacter in all Spiritual Duties hear more heedfully pray more fervently receive more believingly keep the Sabbath more exactly watch over my heart and ways more diligently be more humble and pious towards God more just and righteous to man more sober and temperate towards my self that I may walk worthy of Christ of the Covenant of the Sacrament Kingdom Gospel and Grace of God of my Birth and Breeding oh that my present deportment may be answerable to my future preferment that there may be some proportion between my frequent receiving and growing in Grace that I may shew forth his death till he come in respect of its influence on my Soul Delight in Spiritual fellowship with Christ's Members Oh that I may now bury all envy malice hatred uncharitableness and as Christ love my enemies but especially those that are partakers of the same benefits with me O that that sentence may still run in my mind If God so loved us we ought also to love one another Oh that I may shake off all ungodly society have my heart linked