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worthy_a of_o his_o imitation_n edmund_n trench_n march_n 10._o 1684._o my_o father_n motto_n and_o my_o own_o 2_o cor._n 1.12_o in_o simplicity_n and_o godly_a sincerity_n phil._n 1.21_o to_o i_o to_o live_v be_v christ_n and_o to_o die_n be_v gain_n phil._n 3.8_o i_o count_v all_o thing_n but_o dung_n that_o i_o may_v win_v christ_n rarius_fw-la de_fw-la dogmatibus_fw-la christus_fw-la disseruit_fw-la saepiùs_fw-la immo_fw-la vero_fw-la ubique_fw-la &_o semper_fw-la de_fw-la vivendi_fw-la sinceritate_fw-la vivere_fw-la bis_fw-la vitâ_fw-la posse_fw-la priore_fw-la frui_fw-la ampliat_fw-la aetatis_fw-la spatium_fw-la sibi_fw-la vir_fw-la bone_fw-la the_o title_n of_o angel_n sometime_o give_v to_o minister_n shall_v mind_v they_o of_o imitate_v those_o glorious_a spirit_n as_o far_o as_o may_v consist_v with_o the_o frailty_n of_o flesh_n and_o blood_n divide_v their_o time_n betwixt_o behold_v the_o face_n of_o their_o father_n in_o heaven_n and_o minister_a to_o the_o heir_n of_o 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and_o therefore_o my_o inclination_n to_o divinity_n still_o continue_v though_o i_o have_v make_v some_o progress_n in_o physic_n after_o about_o a_o year_n absence_n i_o return_v 1664_o continue_v with_o my_o parent_n at_o london_n till_o the_o plagve_n and_o fire_n for_o awhile_o remove_v we_o midsummer_n 1688_o we_o come_v to_o crouched-fryar_n and_o with_o my_o brother_n be_v happy_a in_o comfort_v and_o divert_v my_o father_n till_o we_o be_v witness_n of_o his_o bless_a departure_n he_o leave_v beside_o myself_o dear_a brother_n thomas_n bear_v apr._n 14_o 1648._o we_o always_o love_v and_o can_v hardly_o remember_v any_o quarrel_n between_o we_o the_o young_a sister_n sarah_n also_o survive_v bear_v may_n 23._o may_n we_o see_v her_o newborn_a may_v i_o do_v my_o duty_n to_o promote_v it_o soon_o after_o my_o father_n death_n i_o be_v seize_v by_o a_o feavourish_a distemper_n accompany_v with_o hypochondriac_a wind_n etc._n etc._n which_o continue_v and_o enforce_v serious_a 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i_o be_v likewise_o anxious_a whether_o restitution_n be_v certain_o make_v for_o the_o wrong_n i_o have_v do_v in_o cambridge_n 10_o year_n before_o and_o determine_v to_o inquire_v and_o do_v what_o be_v further_o requisite_a i_o be_v sensible_a of_o the_o kindness_n of_o this_o affliction_n in_o the_o aforesaid_a search_n and_o resolve_n and_o in_o a_o far_a change_n of_o my_o temper_n grow_v more_o meek_a humble_a and_o charitable_a i_o feel_v more_o my_o own_o vicious_a impotence_n and_o the_o necessity_n of_o divine_a grace_n as_o be_v have_v and_o do_v nothing_o good_a but_o as_o the_o spirit_n make_v i_o every_o moment_n before_o i_o recover_v from_o this_o sickness_n i_o be_v forsake_v by_o my_o thought_n of_o conform_v to_o the_o establish_a church_n by_o submit_v to_o the_o term_n impose_v on_o minister_n to_o which_o i_o have_v be_v sufficient_o incline_v by_o the_o reason_n and_o example_n of_o several_a pious_a and_o judicious_a person_n the_o formidable_a horror_n of_o my_o conscience_n the_o dread_a of_o their_o return_n by_o reason_n of_o some_o doubt_n i_o can_v not_o well_o remove_v determine_v i_o rather_o to_o a_o private_a life_n which_o i_o desire_v to_o render_v as_o useful_a as_o i_o may_v i_o remember_v when_o i_o be_v one_o day_n discourse_v he_o about_o ministerial_a conformity_n he_o tell_v i_o it_o be_v the_o declaration_n of_o assent_n and_o consent_v to_o all_o thing_n contain_v in_o and_o prescribe_v by_o the_o book_n of_o common-prayer_n and_o the_o form_n and_o manner_n of_o ordain_v and_o consecrate_v bishop_n priest_n and_o deacon_n that_o he_o chief_o stick_v at_o and_o can_v not_o think_v that_o declaration_n can_v be_v sincere_o make_v by_o such_o who_o judgement_n disapprove_v so_o many_o thing_n in_o those_o two_o book_n as_o he_o do_v and_o he_o be_v the_o more_o confirm_v in_o his_o aversion_n to_o so_o ensnare_a a_o declaration_n by_o observe_v several_a other_o of_o his_o acquaintance_n that_o have_v make_v it_o though_o under_o the_o same_o dissatisfaction_n with_o himself_o concern_v several_a thing_n contain_v in_o these_o book_n by_o give_v it_o a_o loose_a construction_n than_o he_o think_v the_o word_n capable_a of_o to_o become_v less_o strict_a and_o conscientious_a in_o other_o duty_n of_o religion_n than_o they_o have_v be_v before_o which_o visible_a declension_n from_o their_o former_a seriousness_n and_o circumspection_n he_o be_v afraid_a may_v flow_v from_o their_o have_v too_o far_o suffer_v their_o judgement_n to_o be_v sway_v and_o bias_v by_o their_o interest_n in_o a_o matter_n of_o so_o great_a importance_n hackney_n sept._n 10._o 1670._o i_o return_v from_o deal_n after_o 3_o day_n stay_v with_o my_o dear_a brother_n go_v to_o aleppo_n i_o part_v sad_o with_o one_o so_o dear_a in_o the_o strict_a band_n of_o love_n and_o nature_n yet_o we_o encourage_v ourselves_o in_o our_o good_a god_n who_o favour_n we_o have_v so_o experience_v together_o and_o hope_v we_o shall_v still_o enjoy_v when_o so_o far_o asunder_o i_o desire_v all_o may_v make_v i_o more_o long_a and_o labour_v after_o and_o prepare_v for_o heaven_n where_o friend_n part_v not_o bitter_o any_o more_o and_o where_o god_n be_v all_o in_o all_o for_o ever_o hackney_n octob._n 11._o 1670._o i_o grow_v ill_o of_o a_o quartan_a ague_n as_o it_o quick_o prove_v my_o prayer_n be_v for_o christian_a patience_n and_o wisdom_n to_o bear_v the_o worst_a and_o make_v a_o good_a improvement_n of_o all_o that_o god_n may_v be_v glorify_v myself_o and_o other_o better_v and_o christ_n more_o comfortable_o in_o life_n and_o death_n advantage_n june_n 20._o 1671._o try_v enfield-air_n for_o remove_v my_o ague_n i_o ride_v into_o the_o chase_n and_o be_v among_o the_o tree_n thoughtful_a and_o careless_a my_o horse_n by_o a_o great_a and_o sudden_a start_n turn_v
as_o the_o last_o word_n in_o his_o diary_n with_o a_o very_a weak_a and_o trâ—mâ—â—ing_a hand_n as_o the_o write_n and_o letter_n too_o evident_o show_v cranbroke_a feb._n 19_o 1689._o i_o have_v be_v above_o two_o month_n under_o the_o surgeon_n hand_n for_o a_o sore_a leg_n and_o thigh_n pain_n have_v be_v sometime_o very_o great_a relapse_n from_o fever_n etc._n etc._n several_a apprehension_n of_o death_n frequent_a i_o have_v not_o i_o think_v be_v impatient_a i_o have_v be_v without_o anxious_a thought_n of_o eternity_n and_o willing_a if_o god_n please_v to_o leave_v my_o body_n but_o â—ixedly_o desirous_a not_o to_o continue_v in_o it_o unless_o i_o be_v and_o do_v the_o better_o for_o this_o affliction_n twice_o as_o my_o ill_a circumstance_n permit_v 〈◊〉_d view_v the_o account_n of_o myself_o oct._n 7._o 1685._o and_o still_o hope_v it_o be_v not_o false_a of_o all_o man_n i_o can_v think_v only_o of_o mr._n betwixt_o who_o and_o myself_o there_o be_v any_o unkindness_n but_o i_o think_v none_o sinful_a on_o my_o part_n i_o be_v advise_v against_o meddle_v with_o he_o on_o that_o subject_a because_o i_o can_v not_o see_v it_o be_v my_o duty_n and_o it_o may_v do_v more_o harm_n than_o good_a lord_n pity_v i_o in_o my_o wearisome_a condition_n help_v i_o according_a to_o thy_o great_a goodness_n refine_v i_o for_o thy_o better_a service_n on_o earth_n or_o perfect_a in_o heaven_n of_o his_o carriage_n under_o his_o tedious_a and_o languish_a pain_n the_o follow_a character_n give_v a_o brief_a account_n to_o which_o i_o shall_v only_o add_v that_o his_o patience_n sâ—_n grace_n that_o heaven_n give_v we_o no_o occasion_n to_o exercise_v have_v have_v its_o perfect_a work_n on_o earth_n especial_o under_o a_o affliction_n of_o so_o long_a continuance_n he_o be_v happy_o as_o to_o himself_o dismiss_v from_o his_o labour_n and_o sorrow_n and_o enter_v into_o his_o everlasting_a rest_n march_v 30._o 1688_o 9_o to_o this_o account_n of_o his_o life_n give_v 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observance_n of_o its_o holy_a doctrine_n and_o rule_n his_o daily_a family-exposition_n of_o the_o scripture_n which_o for_o many_o year_n he_o use_v morning_n and_o evening_n i_o have_v often_o think_v equal_a for_o accuracy_n and_o instructiveness_n to_o most_o commentator_n he_o take_v all_o opportunity_n that_o his_o own_o weakness_n and_o family-distraction_n or_o public_a confusion_n will_v allow_v for_o his_o public_a labour_n and_o he_o never_o omit_v preach_v from_o house_n to_o house_n by_o private_a visit_n and_o christian_a conference_n his_o master_n work_n be_v constant_o upon_o his_o heart_n and_o he_o ready_o embrace_v all_o opportunity_n for_o it_o the_o sick_a and_o poor_a be_v sure_a of_o his_o company_n and_o he_o familiar_o condescend_v to_o the_o mean_a capacity_n for_o their_o good_a he_o be_v as_o willing_a to_o instruct_v poor_a cottager_n in_o the_o way_n to_o the_o kingdom_n as_o those_o of_o a_o high_a rank_n and_o degree_n he_o perfume_v every_o place_n 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