Heavenly Eternal and Incomprehensible Glorious Lord God the God and Father of all mercies and of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ I thy poor and unworthy creature despicably poor blind and naked and out of Christ I confess and acknowledge that I have nothing wherewith to cover my nakedness and deformity but unclean filthy raggs my own righteousness being unrighteousness my own obedience being disobedience my own worthiness being unworthiness so that all my all is even nothing at all and can be fitly compared to nothing but to nothing I see now and know my self to be a most miserable wretch the chiefest and the greatest of all sinners yea the very worst of the worst of all the sons of Adam dry bones rottenness filthiness barrenness uncleanness naughtiness emptiness unsavoury salt a well without water a broken cistern that can hold no water impurity unholiness all evil and altogether all evil always without and within in Spirit Soul and Body all my thoughts words and actions and that continually I sincerely confess and proclaim unto thee O God and before Angels and Men that there is nothing in me as I am in my self which doth or can deserve the least of all thy mercies not the least look of Love not the least smile nor glance of one of thine eyes O Lord in favour nor to be admitted to look up to Heaven or call thee O God Father nor to expect the least admittance into thy glorious presence Thou mayest O God thou mayest most justly reprove and reproach me openly and take all my Prayers Petitions and what else soever and as dung throw them in my face to my everlasting shame and confusion and to thine own honour glory and praise thy judgment would be just right and good and all both good and bad must and would applaud thee for it and my own soul and Conscience would say Amen thereunto for there is not any of thy Divine Commandments and most holy laws but I have broken again and again wittingly willingly knowingly and presumptuously I have often cast thy precepts behind my back and trampled them under my feet I have often O God I confess I have often turned thy grace into wantonness quencht the sweet and blessed motions of thy holy Spirit hated to be reformed chose the ways of Hell death and destruction for Body and Soul and run knowingly and wilfully out of the ways of Heaven bliss and everlasting rest and happiness I would not that thou shouldest reign over me who art the Lord of Life and Glory I have prophan'd thy house thy Sanctuary thine Ordinances thy Word and Sacraments Thus even thus and a thousand times worse have I rebelliously and traiterously acted against thy Soveraignty and Power though I knew that thou wert Lord over all and above all even God blessed for ever and for ever by whom I did live move and had my being Ah Lord I know well that thou knowest all that I have ever done against thee or would have done I know well that nothing is or can be hid from thee thou seest into the dark corners and crannies of our hearts thoughts and affections thou knowest what I am and what I would be and how I should have â—hus continued unto my lives end hadst â—hou not in love and mercy pull'd me out of the everlasting burning as a brand out of the fire if thou hadst not O God come in â—o my help and succour the Devil had devoured me the Devil had destroyed me for ever and for ever for I was his captive his vassal his slave I did his will I obeyed his commands I did even run when he â—id me go But ever praised be thy transcendent glorious name O God of all goodness and Father of Love mercy and compassion that wert pleased to make my calamity and extremity thine opportunity that then even then when thou sawest that all help out of thy self was in vain thou shouldest be pleased to come and succour me and set me free to break the fetters and chains by which I was led as a most miserable Caitif and Captive almost into Hell it self thou hast O God thou hast broken the snares and I am escaped thou hast delivered my Soul from death and my Songs shall be to praise thee whilst I live I will praise thee O Lord my deliverer and never keep silence rather would I that my tongue should cleave to the roof of my mouth than not declare the mercies and the loving kindness of thee my God to my poor Soul and I trust as well as pray and beseech thee O my God and Father in Jesus Christ that thou wilt daily put new Songs of praise into my mouth and that thou wilt in some measure enable me to speak fitly worthily and opportunely of thy gratious dealings towards me that those that hear and know thee may with me labour to be more affected and delighted with thee and prize thee yet at a far higher prize and that others that hear and know thee not may so hear as that they may resolve to seek thee with us and may see thee to be the fairest of ten thousand yea the only fair lovely beautiful and desirable But O incomprehensible unconceivable unexpressible goodness love and bounty the Ocean and Fountain of all bliss blessedness and happiness how can I how shall I worm I nothing I speak of thee and of thy gratious dealings unto my poor Soul O the heighth depth length and breadth of thy Love it is as the Heavens for heighth as Hell for depth as Eternity for length and as from Everlasting to Everlasting for breadth nay all this is far short of it it is much more than all this by much for it is thy self O God thy only self thy very self that thou hast given me thy Kingdom and thy Glory and not only in Heaven hereafter but even now now hast thou done this for my poor unworthy Soul having often fed feasted and solaced my Soul with those ravishing joys that thou hast laid up and prepared for those that unfeignedly love thee thou hast in thy goodness bounty and love often caused me to tast of that hidden Manna that bread of Life and to drink of those Rivers of pleasures that flow from thine own right hand thou hast many times as it were carried my Soul into that mountain of happiness where I have seen thy glorious back parts thy gratious transcendent goodness and have beheld in the Spirit the Celestial Canaan the new Jerusalem the City of God even God in Man communicating himself unto him for Christ the hope of glory is in us dwells in us and makes his abode there which is thy Tabernacle O God thou hast not only given him for us on the Cross but thou continually continuest to give him unto us to crucifie our sins and sinfull lusts and affections in us to put them to death that he himself may live and reign and rule in us that we may
Prisoner never any man desired so much to be let out of Prison as I do to be put in never any slave desired so much to be free as I doe to be bound unto thee O God my God unto thee unto thee my God never any man desired so earnestly to pay his debts as I desire to be further and to be more indebted give me O Lord I beseech thee more and more that I may every day yea every moment of the day all the days of my life unto the very last moment of the last day of my life be receiving that when this life is ended I may live an Eternal life to pay thee Eternally praise and thanksgiving Be thou then Ah sweet Jesus be thou always in me that I may always be in thee stand by me continually that I may always stand upright walk uprightly never fall go with me that I may never go from thee abide O Lord abide ever in me that I may ever abide in thee act in me O Lord act ever in me that I may ever act for thee speak O Lord speak continually in me that I may continually speak for thee work for me O Lord work always for me that I may always work for thee live in me O Lord live always in me that I may always live to thee and for thee Ah Lord do all for me do all for me that all that I shall henceforth always do may be all for thee that I may choose not my own will but thy will may be my choice Ah Lord let me know thy blessed voice that I may always answer thee at thy blessed call whether it be by night or by day as Samuel did and say with him and with his heart speak Lord for thy Servant heareth and with holy David for my heart is ready and with heavenly Paul what Lord what wilt thou have me to do Write O Lord I humbly beseech thy holy and divine laws of grace in my heart that with my heart I may delight in them and thy Statutes in my mind that all even all my mind may be still on them that they may be a savour of life unto life to my soul and of death unto death to my sins let thy Commandments O Lord be no more grievous unto me but joyous that I may ever find thy yoak easie and thy burthen light Let thy word O God feed me yea let me feast on it as on marrow and fatness let it refresh and comfort my heart as with Wine on the Lees yea as Wine well refined on the Lees let it be sweeter to my tast then honey yea then the Hony-comb Ah Lord let my heart be set on it and much more delighted with it then with gold yea then with much fine gold or precious pearls let it distill into my heart to ravish it Ah Lord let it so ravish me as all my sences may be filled and delighted with its sweetness Let me O Lord hear it attentively understandingly and feelingly as thine own word which thine own mouth hath spoken that my mouth may be filled with thy praises yea that I may trumpet them forth louldly and sweetly let mine eyes always look upon thee O Lord from whence my salvation cometh to behold thy beauty thy glory and thy blessedness as in thy Sanctuary that my feet may run in the ways of thy Commandments and not grow weary and walk and not faint O Lord let me sit under the shadow of thy branches continually for thy fruit is very pleasant unto my tast there is none in Heaven O Lord that my soul desireth as thee nor in all the earth in comparison of thee Ah how doth my soul and my heart long to be where thou art even where thou art O God in Heaven thy dwelling place glading and rejoycing the hearts of all those that behold thee beholding the brightness the sweetness the loveliness and the lovingness of thy most glorious most beautiful and most blessed countenance which to see is life yea much better than life Ah Lord bring me then home unto thee even to my long desired home that I may ever enjoy thee and live in thee my joy in whom my soul only delighteth to live for with thee I know is all joy unspeakable joy fulness of joy and at thy right hand O God are pleasures for ever more such as eye hath not seen ear hath not heard neither hath it ever entred into the heart of any man at any time to conceive Ah Lord God I well know and believe rejoycingly that thou knowest all things and therefore knowest well how my heart and my soul panteth for thee longeth for thee coveteth for thee and most ambitiously hungreth and thirsteth after thee Ah Lord when shall that blessed time be and the day come that I shall be altogether emptyed of my own emptyness and filled with thy fulness be stript of my own raggs and cloathed with thy glorious robes be found out of my self in thee be made partaker of thine own Holy and Divine nature which is perfection and glory in glory yea perfect glory then shall I be no more mine own but thine own yea thine all so that all that I shall do shall please thee well and be right well pleassing unto thee for then I shall no longer do the evil which I would not and which I hate but the good which I would and which I love yea the good and all the good that thou O God wilt and which thou lovest it shall not then be present with me only to will but to do also even all thy holy and whole and perfect will I shall then no longer desire to be stript of any thing that is in me because O God my God thou shalt be all in me and only in me then and there I shall no longer mourn for my unholiness nor pray for more blessedness but all tears fears and cares shall be all done away my unworthiness here shall through thy worthiness O sweet Jesus be accounted worthy my unrighteousness righteous my disobedience obedience and my imperfection perfect full and entire perfection through that ever blessed most blessed and only and all blessed perfection that in the thee who art God blessed for ever and ever Ah who would not then for a while feed on crums that he may eat of this bread and at last sup at this feast Ah who would not who would not be content to hunger a while to be brought to this banquet of heavenly dainties who would not Ah who would not be content for a little space to sit grovelling on the ground and be covered with dust and ashes that he may at last sit at this Table who would not Ah who would not stay a while without with patience being assured at last yea and ere long to be brought in into the brides Chamber Ah who would not who would not be poor for a while to be made thus rich for ever Ah who would
not who would not be content to be contemptible for a little space to be thus honoured and made truly honourable for ever Ah who would not who would not be right well content to be banisht for a while to be thus brought home in triumph gloriously to abide in his Fathers house for ever who would not Ah who would not be well content and rejoyce to be a stranger and a Pilgrim for a little while in a strange land to have such a possession for ever who would not Ah who is there that would not be in a storm for a while to enjoy for ever such a calm who would not who would not want the delicacies of Egypt for a while to have the delicacies of Heaven for ever who would not Ah who is there that would not refuse to be called the Son of Pharaoh's Daughter for a while to be the Son of the Eternal living loving blessed God for ever and for ever Ah who would not who would not willingly and cheerfully suffer with the Children of God for a while for a little space to raign with the Children of God for ever who would not Ah who would not willingly be cloathed with raggs for a while to wear for ever such glorious robes who would not Ah who is he that would not be Crowned with Thorns for a moment to be Crowned with such a Crown of glory for ever Ah who would not who would not bear the Cross here till death that he may for ever wear the Crown of immortal life Ah who would not who would not suffer with Christ here to raign with Christ for ever hereafter Ah who would not who would not be despised among men to be cherished among Angels Ah who would not who would not suffer as Lazarus did to raign as Lazarus doth Ah who would not who would not suffer as a member of Christs mystical body here to be a member of his glorious body for ever hereafter Ah who would not who would not live the life of the righteous here to live for ever and ever with the righteous hereafter not in the bosome of Abraham but in the bosome of Abraham's Isaac's and Jacob's Gods In the mean time O Lord give me grace courage and strength to run that good race to fight that good fight that thou hast set before me perseveringly unto the end that I may as willingly wear the Crown of Thorns here for thy sake as the Crown of glory hereafter for my own sake that I may be as willingly under temptation here as to be freed from temptation hereafter that for thy sake O Lord I may as willingly be contemptible here as honourable hereafter that I may as willingly suffer O Lord for thee here as raign with thee hereafter and that in all sufferings my only joy may be that I shall for ever enjoy thee But Ah Lord God what am I and what is there in me and therefore what am I able to do for thee or to render unto thee for this thy love which far surpasseth the love of Women Men or of Angels as there was never sorrow like to thy sorrow so there was never love like to thy love true it is O Lord for all this thy love thou requirest nothing but love again Ah how fain would I love thee but I cannot as I would how much less then is it then I should when I would do good evil is present and I do the evil many times which I would not but do not cannot do the good which I would to will is many times present but how to perform I know not but thanks be unto God through our Lord Jesus Christ though with my flesh I serve the law of sin yet with my mind I serve the law of God Grant then O sweet Jesus and give me grace that I may love thee as thou hast loved me and do for thee as thou hast done for me and to this end make my heart upright before thee even according to thine own heart that it may no longer be mine own but thine own that I may be only thine wholly thine holy thine always thine and ever thine that thou in me and I in thee may from sin be ever free Teach me O Lord so to number my days that I may apply my heart unto Wisdom that I may be always mindfull of my last end and of the reckoning that I must then make before thee the Judge of Heaven and Earth Ah Lord suffer me not any longer to walk after the devices of mine own decitfull evil heart but grant O God by thy power I may have power to do and walk uprightly before thee in all thy paths and that I may never more swerve nor turn aside out of the way of thy Commandments either to the right hand of pleasures or to the left hand of profits Give me grace O Lord God I most humbly beseech thee in Jesus Christ to see mine own badness and thy goodness ready and willing to make me good that I may see mine own emptiness and thy fulness ready to fill me mine own nakedness and thy robes to cover and cloath me mine own sinfulness and thy righteousness to make me righteous mine own cursedness and thy blessedness to make me blessed my own deformity and ugliness and thy beautifulness to make me beautifull my own slavery and thy freedom and freeness to make me free mine own unworthyness and thy worthyness to make me worthy mine own insufficiency and thine al-sufficiency mine own demerit and thy merit mine own disobedience and thine obedience mine own nothingness yea altogether nothing and thine Almightiness yea altogether all things for in thee are all things from thee come all things and by thee O God all things are and were created I do most unfeignedly confess O Lord that I am unable and unfit to speak unto thee and as unworthy to hear thee speak unto me for in me that is in my flesh there is no good I am all evil only evil and continually evil but in thee O God dwelleth all good for thou art all good only good and continually dost good without thee I can say nothing think nothing nor do nothing that is good suffer me not therefore O Lord I beseech thee to speak in my own wisdom for that would be but the wisdom of words but let me O Lord speak in thy wisdom which will be the words of wisdom and Wisdoms words Let me not O Lord go forth in my own strength against any Temptation for I am so weak I should be overcome and fall into any Temptation but let thy strength thy power thy might and thy love O Lord be seen in my weakness to strengthen me and by thy power powerfully working in me I may overcome and trample under my feet all the strength and power of all my adversaries and enemies Devils lust worlds lusts and self-lusts Ah Lord God suffer me not to go from thee for thou hast the
Lord to know that thou art a God pardoning all Iniquities Transgressions and sins yea all Blasphemies wherewith they have blasphemed Ah Lord shew them the light of thy gracious and glorious Countenance and lead them in the way everlasting that they may never more swerve nor go astray from thy Divine and Holy Commandments Bless O Lord all that are travelling by Sea or by Land and bring them to their Ports and Places in safety defend them from all Pirats and Robbers that seek to do them hurt or wrong and from all other perils and dangers pitch thy tents O Lord round about them and keep them even as thou keepest thine own And lastly O Lord I most humbly and heartily beg and beseech thee in Jesus Christ to pardon and forgive all mine Enemies all the world over love them O Lord that hate me bless them that curse me do good to them that seek to do me evil forget and forgive all that they have done or would have done against me and change their hearts from evil unto good that they may no longer walk after the deceitfulness of their own evil Hearts but may do all things for the time to come in truth and sincerity according to thine own heart O Lord God that thou mayest own them for thy own and give them hearts O Lord to forgive me whom I have wronged whether it have been in thought word or deed either unto high or low rich or poor young or old and grant O Lord that I may fear and do so no more but as thou hast been unto me a sin-pardoning God so I beseech thee be unto me a sin-preventing God that I may not as the Dog return to his Vomit nor as the Sow to her wallowing in the mire again but that I may always henceforth set thee O Lord before mine eyes and be attent unto the motions of thy holy spirit and never to forget thy exceeding bountifull and mercifull dealings towards me and that love in Jesus Christ wherewith thou hast loved me and that I may remember that it is impossible for those who were once enlightned and have tasted of the Heavenly gift and were made partakers of the Holy Ghost and have tasted the good word of God and the Powers of the World to come if they shall fall away to renew them again unto Repentance seeing they Crucifie to themselves the Son of God afresh and put him to open shame for if we sin wilfully after that we have received the knowledge of the truth there remaineth no more sacrifice for sin but a certain fearfull looking for of Judgment and fiery indignation which shall devour the adversaries for having Lord by thy grace and mercy escaped the pollutions of the world through the knowledge of the Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ grant that I may not again be intangled therein and overcome and so my latter end prove worse if worse it can be than was my beginning Ah Lord God should such be my case which God forbid it would be much better for me that I had never known the way of Righteousness than after the knowledge of it to turn from thy holy Commandments delivered unto me Ah Lord God my Lord and my God in Jesus Christ thou knowest my weakness frailty and impotency that I cannot of my self as of my self think a good thought that I am prone to all evil and averse to all good to will indeed is many times present but how to perform I know not there is still O Lord God a law in my members warring against the law of my mind and leading me Captive into the law of sin Ah Lord when when O Lord when shall that time come and that blessed most blessed and glorious day dawn and appear in my heart that the root and branch of sin be totally rooted up and utterly destroyed and grace confirmed and grow up more and more until I come to be a perfect man in Christ Jesus that I may still more and more hate the evil which I do and love the good which I do not and cannot do that it may be no longer I that sin but sin that dwelleth in me and that by the assistance of thy grace and holy Spirit I may walk well pleasing before thee doing thy work and thy will here on earth as it is done in Heaven living the life of grace here and of glory hereafter the life of the Righteous that I may dye their death Ah Lord give thy self to me that I may give my self to thee live in me that I may live to thee owne me for thine own that I may owne thee for mine all give me Ah give me O Lord much grace that I may give thee much glory daily grace that I may give thee daily glory continually grace that I may give thee continually glory that I may be all thine O Lord only thine always thine and ever thine and all this I most humbly and unfeignedly beg of thee and whatever else thou knowest to be needfull or expedient for me both for my soul and body for the name and for the worthiness of Jesus Christ thy Son and my Saviour to whom with thy Glorious Majesty and Holy Spirit of Grace do I render and give with my whole heart as all due is and unto none else Honour Glory Power Might Majesty Dominion and Thanksgiving now henceforth and for evermore Amen Amen 34. If the love of Creatures be so lovely unto us and we esteem and love them most for their love and this their love doth many times sweetly satisfie and ravish our senses But how then are our hearts set on fire with Love when we have within us the fiery hot burning Love of a Loving God yea of a God of Love whose Love is so lovely as it knits our hearts in Love unto him and our greatest Love unto him is from his own Love because he hath so loved us as to give us hearts to love him even according to his own heart 35. If our Joy be according to the measure of Love which we enjoy from the Creature whom we most love Ah how great yea incomprehensibly great shall our joy be when we shall know and feel that we are beloved above measure by the Creator who maketh the Creature thus lovely and giveth him Love thus to love him 36. If our Love many times be so great unto the Creature for the Creature that we do not and it seems to us that we cannot love him so much as we would and do desire to do and we crave and desire chiefly his Love that we may yet love him more and this from and because we love him so much and for that our senses can be only satisfied with his Love and by loving of him for we love him most for his Love and his Love doth cause us to love him more whom we love so much yea whom we love most 37. But Ah how great then yea how wonderfully great is the
love is thy self for thou art not only a loving God but a God of love and therefore thy love is as thy self had never beginning nor shall never have end 270. Ah blessed love that is thus durable and unchangable and happy yea thrice happy he that is thus beloved being sure to be beloved ever thus 271. If a man or woman in the flesh hath unspeakable joy pleasure and delight to be divorc'd from one which they hate beyond and more than any thing and are instead thereof marryed unto one which they dearly love yea which they love more dearly than any thing in the flesh 272. Ah what joyes Ah what delights and ravishing pleasures shall they have and have all they that shall be and are divorc'd from their old Husbands sin whom they hate as the Devil and fear and fly from as from Hell and are marryed unto their new new beloved Husband Christ Jesus whom they love above and more than all things as their lives as their souls yea as their Heaven for he is the life of their life the soul of their soul and the Heaven of their Heaven being their soul and bodies Eternal Everlasting rest peace portion happiness felicity and blessedness in Heaven for 273. There are no joys like to spiritual joys nor sorrow like to the spiritual mans sorrow when he mourns under that intolerable burthen of sin for a wounded Conscience who can bear 274. The unregenerate man cannot love sin and hate grace as the regenerate man loves grace and hates sin for he hath the love of God in him his Image of holiness and righteousness is renewed in him day by day he loves all his gifts and graces with his own love perfectly and so he hates all and every sin in thought word and deed which is in sincerity 275. The fleshly Voluptuous man cannot love the pleasures of the flesh as the spiritual man prizeth and loves and delights and rejoyceth in the pleasures of the spirit 276. The Wicked cannot hate the Righteous and the just so much as the just and the Righteous love the wicked though they detest abhor and hate all their sins for they know that a Saul to day may be a Paul to morrow c. They cannot see the inside of any nor know their hearts therefore they judge none but themselves knowing with what measure they mete it shall be measured to them again they also call to mind and remember what they were themselves in time past how they lived after the flesh and minded the things of the flesh c. And that where sin hath abounded graâ—â— shall much more abound that 't is by free grace that we are saved Eternal life is the gift of God through Jesus Christ our Lord and we are all unprofitable servants when we have done all 277. Sin then is opposite capital and grand Enemy to holiness as hatred is to love as darkness is to light as Hell is to Heaven as the Devil is to God 278. See then and consider how they are opposite and take notice of their contrary workings and in the end how and by what means it is that the good destroys the evil and is the Conquerour and the greatest 279. Sin is Eternal darkness and death Holiness is Eternal light and life sin shuts Heavens Gates and sets wide open Hells Holiness shuts the Gates of Hell aâ—d sets wide open those of Heaven sin wounds holiness heals sin casts down to Hell holiness raiseth up to Heaven sin kills holiness causeth to live the sinner hates God and all good and most of all God because he is good and because he is God yea because he is such a holy God as he is and he would that he were not that sin might be and might be free but the Saint or Regenerate loves all good and hates all evil and loves most of all God because he is God a holy and a just God all good yea because he is such a God as he is and as well for that he punisheth sin with Eternal death as because he rewardeth holiness with Eternal life after he hath given it with his free grace of his free will sin shall be ever in Hell as well as holiness for ever in Heaven the sinner in Hell shall be despighted because he lives to sin and cannot dye nor fly from sin and because that God lives and thus punisheth him with life and will not suffer death to have power over him he sees death to fly from him yea so far as it will never be nearer him than it is so that he shall ever live thus the Saints rejoyce to live because they live in God and for God a Saint loves God because he hath thus rewarded him by making him to live such a life as this that is to his praise and because God was ever thus and shall be thus ever he knoweth he shall be ever so also death is fled from him and shall be never nearer him than it is he knoweth he shall ever live thus that is be thus ever with God in God and see him and know him as he is to be known and seen which is to possess him for ever and for ever 280. Thus then holiness and sin are Opposites and Enemies but holiness destroys sin as light doth darkness this eternal darkness of sin must vanish when this eternal everlasting light of holiness doth appear thus is it conquered and overcome because holiness is from God and sin from the Devil holiness from the Creator sin from the Creature holiness had never beginning nor shall never have end sin had a beginning and therefore not from the beginning the Devil then brought sin into the World but God who is holiness was so before time before that ever the World or the Devil was sin then is the lesser being from the Creature the worser being from the Devil holiness the greater being from the Creator the better being and proceeding from him that is all good and giveth all good to all to make them good all yea all good as himself for all the good that is in all the Creatures in Heaven and oâ— earth is from his good he filleth them all but emptyeth not himself at all he is still the same still full yea so full still as he overfloweth still into them from his own fullness and they though filled full yet do they still receive from his fulness without having in them any emptiness being always full from the very beginning that they are with him and yet are they continually receiving as if they were as well emptyed as filled thus doth our good gracious loving and merciful God satisfie us and resatiate us every moment giving us what we ask not what we want not what we know not and though he doth thus increase his blessings by blessing us yet doth he not suffer them to decrease in us when given us but we retain all hold fast all keep all rejoyce in all and give
all by whatever he gives he is still the same full of all blessedness and goodness always ready to distribute and give unto the necessity of the Saints never weary nor standing still yesterday to day and to morrow and for ever the same 50. Therefore to have much is to ask much ask and ye shall have that your joy may be full God doth not say or mean that we may or can be too bold that we may ask too much And to take away this scruple or doubt he promiseth that what ever we shall ask believingly in the name of Jesus Christ we shall receive if we open our mouths wide then we have his promise that he will fill them which implies that the way or means to have much is to ask much this holy Coveting and Ambition he is well pleased with and so good bountiful and free our God is that we cannot please him better than after what ever we have asked to believe that he will give us much more by much than we are able to ask or think whoever lacks Wisdom if he ask it of God he will give it liberally for he upbraids no man neither is he a respecter of persons having given us Jesus Christ his only Son the Son of his love and delight how shall he not with him give us all things 51. Surely surely seeing he hath and daily doth give us such things as these Himself his Son and holy Spirit we may be sure we shall as Abraham did be weary or leave asking or God will leave giving for weary he cannot be fit then thy self to be filled and I promise and assure thee who ever thou art thou shalt not be sent empty away what ever thy hunger and thirst be whatever thy coveting and ambition be thou shalt have to fill thee to satisfie thee yea over and above what ever thou canst ask or think believe for all things are possible yea easie for him to do 52. The life which delighteth the Lord and which he would have us to live is to live unto all holiness and godliness every day even as we would do if we knew it to be our last day yea to live every moment of the day all our days as if it were our very last moment 53. The death of the Righteous every one seemingly desires to dye but truly I may say of the most that thus say be they whoever they be that they know not well what they say because that perhaps not one of a thousand but denyes it in his deeds for the death of the Righteous in which the Lord delighteth as in their life and which honours him most even as a holy and godly that is God-like life doth I say this death of the Righteous is as I take it to dye daily yea every moment of the day to all sin even to all both great and small in thought in word and deed to dye thus is to honour glorifie and dignifie more the Lord than to dye any temporal death on the Rack in the flames of fire or to be buried alive c. 'T is not with these Ah not with these Sacrifices of our fleshly lives but with those Sacrifices of our Lusts Corruptions and sinful affections that God is well pleased refreshed as it were and delighted These Sacrifices send up sweet Odours in his Nostrils these are pretious in his eyes I thus thus doubtless it is that the death of the Saints are pretious in the eyes of the Lord to put to death those cruel ones those Enemies of our Eternal life of our souls salvation that put to death the Lord of life and glory himself in his manhood this is to be valiant for the Lord to do wonders or wonderfully to fight well his battels and to help the Lord as it were against the mighty Ah how is he delighted that we will avenge our selves thus on his Enemies and spare none alive but as Samuel did hew Agag the King himself in pieces this is to be jealous for the Lord with a godly jealousie and to have our love for the Almighty to be as hot as fire Ah thus thus if we pull out our right eyes and cut off our right hands we shall be sure to enter into life but not maimed but whole and entire And he that is thus willing to lose his life shall save it and he that will spare or save his life that is his life of sin or fleshly life to live in and commit sin shall surely lose his life both Spiritual Temporal and Eternal 54. He that thus dyes all the day long all his life long dyes much more gloriously by much in the eyes of the Lord God and in the eyes of all his enlightened Children than if he did suffer in the flesh constantly all his dayes the cruellest death of any of all the Martyrs Ah to suffer thus is to suffer truly is to suffer rightly for the cause of Christ and the honour of the Gospel for 't is not Ah no our outward sufferings in the flesh that delighteth the Lord for he is a God oâ— joy and would that we did always rejoyce and is there any other thing that we do oâ— can do that gives us so much cause to rejoyce as to be delivered but of the hands of all our Enemies and to see them lye slaiâ— before our eyes as the Egyptians Ah then then may we serve him without fear then and thereby do we serve the Lord in Righteousness and true Holiness and he that is thus faithful unto the death to put sin to death every moment of his life shall be sure in the end of his dayes to have the full end of all his desires and to wear for ever the Crown of Eternal life he that thus fights shall overcome he that thus suffers no sin to raign in his mortal body shall raign with Christ in bliss and glory world without end Amen Amen 55. Thus then to live and thus do dye is to be sure we shall live with Christ Eternally 56. He that doth live thus and thus puts sin to death lives that life and dyes that death daily as most of all honours God and which brings him most glory which is the thing only or the only thing as I suppose that all Gods Children most desire and long for in this life 57. He that thus lives shall ever live and he that thus puts sin to death is past from death to life and shall never see death that is the power of death to terrifie him for death is swallowed up into Victory death when it comes shall carry him in triumph yea triumphantly into the blessed arms of his blessed Jesus who hath thus redeemed him from Hell from sin and from death to live ever with himself in bliss and glory an Eternal life 58. When I shall find that sin is thus put to death in me then will I say boldly that the Lord hath sent his destroying Angel to do it that he
Jesus 124. Let me O Lord so think on the world as to hate it more and more until thou givest me so much grace so to hate it as to think on it no more 125. Let me not O Lord live so long as to desire to be younger to live longer 126. But let me rejoyce in my age for that I am nearer the death of Sin and the life of Eternal Glory 127. Make me O Lord not only such as I desire to be but such as thou woulâ— have me to be which is I trust to be â— with thee and in thee 128. I desire O Lord not only to what I would be but what I should be 129. It is in thee O Lord to give things for thou art all things therefore thee do I humbly beg all things 130. Let me not live one moment long after I have done the work of my Generaâ— on that is not live for my self but â— thee O Lord. 131. Let my will O Lord be only to â— thy will to will thy will and to submit thy wills will 132. Let me be wholly thine holy thinâ— only thine always thine and ever thinâ— here in thy Kingdom of Grace and hereaâ—ter in thy Kingdom of Glory 133. I had much rather have the punisâ—ment of Sin and not sin then the evil Sin and no Punishment 134. Ah how sweet is it to want thâ— worlds sweets and in its want to find nâ— want but even in want most to abound 235. O Lord thou knowest I desire no so much the world as to have my thoughtâ— and affections taken from the world 136. Could Heaven and Eternal life bâ— purchased for to choose and commit onâ— â—n willingly I would not purchase nor â—ave it on that condition but rather deâ—end on the love and mercy of God in Jeâ—s Christ 137. I am sure God is my God because â—e hath given me a heart to fear him in love â—nd to love him with fear and trembling to â—ejoyce in his Statutes to desire to do his â—ill universally and to depend and trust â—n his sure mercies and faithfull promise in â—esus Christ 138. I am sure God did ever love me â—ecause I am sure he doth now love me â—nd therefore I am sure he will ever love â—e for where he once loveth he ever loâ—eth and did ever love 139. I am sure God loveth me because â—e hath given me a heart to hate all sin uniâ—ersally with a sincere and perfect hatred â—oth in thought word and deed 140. I am sure God loveth me because â—e hath given me true conviction and sinâ—ere sound and unfeigned repentance from â—nd for all sin esteeming all exceeding sinâ—ll both the great and the small 141. I am sure God loveth me because â— delight in his ways and for that all my â—ongings and desires are to do all his will 142. I am sure God loveth me because find his Yoak easie and his burthen light 143. I am sure God loveth me becauâ— would not commit any Sin nor could Iâ— willingly to get his love if I doubted oâ— 144. I know and am sure that God lâ—eth me because that I do most heartily aâ— sincerely desire to love him a thousaâ— thousand times more then my own self 145. I know God loveth me becausâ— love him most for himself 146. I know God loveth me becausâ— desire nothing so much as to be his faithfuâ— humble and obedient Servant 147. I know God loveth me because love every man especially such as I belieâ— love him and because their conditions whâ— ever they be make none with me 148. I know God loveth me because love every mans Soul prosperity and haâ—piness as my own and their bodies moâ—then my own 149. I know God loveth me becauâ— those that have been and are still my Enâ—mies in the flesh I love both in the fleâ— and spirit 150. I know God loveth me because do sincerely pray for the Souls and Bodiâ— of those whom I have cause to believe thâ— they hate me 151. I know God loves me because â— hate nothing but what he hates which is sâ— 152. I know God loves me because he hath thus changed my heart from hatred to love and hath made me to hate what I loved and to love what I hated 153. I know God loves me because I love all things for his Glory all things in subordination to him who is all things 154. Ah sweet Jesus give me so much love to love thee here on earth as thou lovedst me when thou wert here for I cannot â—elfe love thee enough nor soon enough 155. Ah that I had ever loved thee and never loved sin 156. Ah Lord give me this great grace of love that I may forget all other love forsake all other love and hate all other love that shall in the least hinder my love to thee or lessen my loving of thee for my soul desireth only to love thee 157. Thou only art lovely Ah my sweet Jesus and my only beloved 158. O Lord my God let my love to thee increase as my life shall decrease 159. And as I draw nearer to thee let me O Lord find thee more lovely and more and more to love me 160. Let me so love thee O Lord my Lord as I may love thee only serve thee only fear thee only and bâ— delighted râ—vished and comforted in and with thy love 161. With thee O Lord I leave my sâ— as a token of my love Aâ— give me thinâ— and let us never change 162. The love O Lord I have for theeâ— confess I had from thee it being now in mâ— O let us both abide and let me dwell thee 163. Let it never be separated froâ— thee nor me but of two let us be made onâ— and never more be alone 164. My whole desire O Lord is to â— thy will it is to thee and to remember thâ— 165. O Lord lead me by thy holy anâ— blessed Spirit that I may never be led astraâ— 166. Let me not O Lord do any thing bâ— my self as for my self but all things by thâ— self and for thy self 167. Be thou always with me that I maâ— never be without thee O most holy anâ— blessed Spirit my Sanctifier that I may bâ— all and always sanctified 168. Let me love thee O Lord more foâ— thy Service sake then for my Souls sake 169. Let me desire and long for Heaveâ— more to do thy will then to have my willâ— 170. O Lord if thou wert not in Heaveâ— I would not desire Heaven but my desirâ— should be to be with thee 171. O Lord let the same desires be iâ— me whilst I am on earth as shall be in meâ— when I am in Heaven 172. The desire of my heart and soul Lord thou knowest is only to thee and â— thee and to be always guided by thee 173. Increase this holy desire in me O â—rd until my soul and body shall be filled â—th thy blessed fulness 174. O sweet Jesus dwell in me ever
â—d go not out of me never for when I â—ve thee Lord I have all that I desire â—d crave 175. I am most willing and ready to â—se my life to preserve thee O Lord but â—t to preserve my life to lose thee 176. O Lord what thou hast given me â—hich is all take when thou wilt and in â—hat manner thou wilt 177. Make O Lord thine own Conditions â—ith me I will make none with thee but â— obey thee and serve thee on thine own â—rms 178. Teach me O Lord to know my â—lf as thou knowest me and to hate my â—lf for Sin as thou lovedst me when I was â— my Sin 179. I desire to hate Sin as the Devil to â—ar Sin as Hell and to fly from Sin as from â—y wrath O great God 180. With thee I desire to leave and give â—y self O sweet Jesus receive me and acâ—ept of me 181 O Lord go with me where I anâ— go thaâ— I mâ—y be always with thee nâ— from â—hee nor do any thing without thâ— 182. O Lord let me only do what tâ— consentest unto 183. I fear Sin much more then the thor of Sin 184. Sin is my worst my greatest my strongest Enemy 185. Give me Grace and strength sweet Jesus to conquer Sin and I shall fear all other Enemies 186. Had I but one sin unforgiven thou should'st O Lord make me my â— Judge I should and could not do otâ— wise then condemn my self for ever â— Hell 187. I desire ever to magnifie laâ— praise and extol thy glorious name O Lâ— God for making Jesus Christ my Judgâ— whom thou hast appointed also to be my 〈…〉 vocate 188. Were I to choose I would choâ— no other for both 189. For sure I am I cannot lose â— cause if he plead it nor be condemn'd judging me who was judged and coâ—demn'd for me 190. He dyed for me and therefore shall not see that death 191. He hath paid my ransome and thereâ—re I must be acquitted 192. He hath suffered and therefore I all ever raign 193. He wore a Crown of Thorns that might ever wear a Crown of an Eternal â—d incomprehensible weight of Glory 194. He is risen and hath led Captivity â—aptive that I might be delivered for ever â—t of all Captivity 195. He is ascended up on high and â—erefore I am sure he will lift me up unto â—m 196. He is gone to prepare a place for â—e therefore I am sure I shall be for ever â—ell plac'd 197. He is sate down on the right hand â—f God and hath convinc'd and conquer'd â—ll my accusers and enemies therefore I â—hall in quiet rest and perfect peace sit â—own with him and by him 198. He hath all power and Authority â—iven him by God therefore I am sure no â—ower shall or can hurt me 199. He hath provided a place for all his Children and Servants therefore I will not â—e afraid nor fear 200. He hath promised and he is faithfull therefore I will believe and not doubt but rejoyce 201. O Lord let me fear nothing but â— nor love nothing but thy â—ear 202. My love O Lord to thee is suâ— thy love to me 203. O Lord put the vail of thy feaâ— fore my eyes and my heart that I â— not sin against thee by neither 204. Ah Lord God suffer me nâ— more to doubt of thy love seeing thou â— so freely and willingly given the Son of love even thy dear only eldest natuâ— and beloved Son Jesus Christ to dye me and in my place and stead 205. Ah sweet Jesus Be thou pleased to take up thy aboad in my heart and dwell there as I may always find thâ— there to comfort me and to direct â— how to walk well pleasing unto thee â— me always hear thee speaking to me hoâ— I shall do every thing I take in hand to dâ— so that all my thoughts words and deed may tend only to thy honour and glory tâ— Credit of the Gospel the good of otherâ— and the eternal Salvation of mine own Soâ— 206. Ah Lord give me grace in all â—flictions to consider that it 's much less the I deserve and that thou mightest justly haâ— sent them on me sooner 207. Hell O Lord I confess is only mâ— desert what less thou givest me is moâ— â—n I have or can deserve and less punishâ—nt then the least of my Sins hath deserved 208. Therefore in all Conditions I desire â—less thy name and to praise thee with a â—nkfull contented and rejoycing heart 209. Let O Lord all thy afflictions teach and tell me that thou art mindfull of â— and that they are friendly yea Father-Visitations and Tokens of thy Fatherly â—e love in Jesus Christ 210. O Lord suffer me not to sell my â—tion in Heaven for any Portion of earth earth the Honours Riches or Pleasures â—ereof 211. Let even this Portion thy service â—d work O God be preferred by me and dearer to me then all things of this world 212. A Christian once in Christ united him cannot be taken out of him no more â—n the same water cast into the Sea can taken out again for he is become a part Christ even as the drops that fall into â—e Sea are forthwith a part thereof 213. Seeing then thou hast made me one â—th thee received me a little drop into â—y self the Ocean of Blessedness and of goodness happiness and felicity My â—eet Jesus I am sure I shall never be sepaâ—ted from thee 214. Let me O God so live the remainder of all my life here on earth as that â— mayest not be ashamed to be called my â— and to give me eternal life hereafter in â—ven 215. O sweet glorious and glorifieâ— sus inhabiting Eternity from all Eterâ— look not on me as I am in my self witâ— thee but as one in thee even as a mâ—ber of thy blessed self 216. Love me O Lord God â— thine own love even with that love iâ— sus Christ wherewith thou lovest thine â— 217. When O Lord I have thee thâ— alone I have what I desire yea and all I desire for thou art all and the only sire of all my desires 218. Give me O Lord thy self thoâ— without any thing else and I will never thee any thing else 219. But though thou dost O God â— me all things else and not thy self I â— account it even as nothing 220. Having thee alone My dear Jeâ— I have all things and having not theâ— have nothing that I truly love 221. Give me then thy self and â— shall content me but unless thou dost â— me thy self I am resolved never to be â—tented 222. Give me then so thy self O Lâ— â—o art my Delight as I may do all things â— thee and nothing at all without thee 223. Give me so thy blessed self as I may â—ays enjoy thee beholding thy glorious â—e and the light of thy blessed Counteâ—ce and may hear thy most sweet and â—mfortable voice to comfort revive â—d refresh me 224. Be thou O
Lord mine all and let â—e be thine all 225. Though I much fear and would â—t commit any sin yet I am not at all aâ—id of all the Sins I have committed 226. Though I know that God hates all â—s yet I much rejoyce that I was made a â—ner 227. Though I know that God justifies â—e ungodly yet I would not be ungodly 228. Though I know that grace doth aâ—ound more then sin yet I would not sin â—at grace may abound 229. Did I doubt of the pardon of my â—ns to have their pardon I would not â—hoose willingly to commit one sin 230. Ah Lord do not only pardon all â—y sins but give me grace to sin no more 231. Let me O Lord be â—s unwilling to â—ve in sin as to dye in sin 232. Let me fear as much the commitâ—ing of any sin as the punishment of all my sins I have committed fear sin before â—mitted as the punishment after commiâ— yea fear sin more then the punishmeâ— sin choose the punishment and not sin â—ther then sin and have no punishment 233. Let me hate sin most because sin and therefore most to be hated 234. Let me hate sin as much after â— doned as before and before commitâ— as after 235. Let me O Lord hate sin as tâ— lovest a sinner that would not sin 236. Let me be O Lord as unwilâ— to commit sin as thou art willing to parâ— them when committed 237. Let me even be as unwillingâ— commit any sin as thou O Lord â— willing to pardon all Sins 238. Let me O Lord die to all â— that I may live to all grace 239. Though O Lord I know tâ— thou pardonest all sins and transgressioâ— yet suffer me not willingly to choose â— commit any sin nor consent to any Trâ—gression 240. Let sin dye that grace may live Let grace live that sin may dyeâ— 241. Let Sin dye in me that thou maâ—est O Lord live in me 242. Let me dye to sin that I may Lord live to thee â—43 Let me O Lord dye to Sin whilst â—e that I may not dye in sin when I am â— â—44 Let me O Lord so dye here to â— that I may not dye hereafter for sin â—45 O Lord let me so dye as I may not â— Eternally â—46 Let sin O Lord be rooted out of â— that I may be rooted in thee and â— in me my sweet and saving Jesus â—47 Let me O Lord be so rooted in â— as I may never be rooted out of thee â—48 Let me Lord take such deep root That I may bring forth much fruit â—49 Let my Root be such in thee That my fruit be much to me Let my fruit be such to thee That the Fruit be like the Tree â—50 Let O Lord my death to Sin appear â—he appearance of the life of grace â—51 Let me O Lord so live as I may â—er dye but to Sin â—52 Let me O Lord so live to thee â— as I may ever live with thee and in â— hereafter â—53 Were not thy work O God the â—rk of my Salvation yet would I prefer it â— do it before that of my Salvation A Prayer AH most blessed Incomprehensible and â—nal Lord God Glorious in Holâ— fearfull in Praises doing wonders the â—vens are not pure in thy sight and yet thoâ— graciously pleased in Jesus Christ to look dâ— and to dwell in poor Man who is sinfull â— and Ashes thou livest only in the highest â—vens and in the lowest hearts the one is Kingdom of Glory the other of thy Grace â— Lord make my heart so low in my own esteeâ— it may be so high in thine that thou may'st â— it thy delight to dwell in it for ever Ah â— when I consider all that thou hast done for â— and all that I have done against thee I aâ— shamed and confusion seems to cover my facâ— Vail having O Lord transgrest all thy and just Laws and broken wilfully williâ— knowingly and presumptuously all thy Diâ— Commandments from the first to the last â— the greatest to the least as well by Commâ— as Omission as well by Actual sin as Origâ— sin knowingly as well as ignorantly both â— fully and willingly on thy days as well aâ— our days in thy house as in other houses inâ—ing thy work as in doing my own work inâ—ties as well as out of duties praying sins â— sins meditating sins Sermon sins and Saâ—ent sins so that my repentance must be reâ—ed off and my Prayers Prayed against eâ— my sighs and groans have need of tears â—ash them and my very tears of doubled â— How Lord have I made thy holy things unâ— unto my self and turned thy graces into â—tonness and quencht the motions of thy hoâ—irit by wilfulness how Lord have I treaâ—d up wrath against the day of wrath unto my â— soul and made thee a savour of death unto when thou comest as a Savour of life how â—e I Lord hated to be reformed and turnâ—rom thee when thou camest running towards in love and in mercy how have I cast thy â—ises behind my back and trampled thy preâ—s under my feet how many times have I â—ken my Promises Vows and Covenants â—e with thee in my straights with how much â—e eagerness and earnestness have I served â— sinful Lusts then thee in thy services my â—d Lord God! and how much more pains â—e I taken for earthly things then for heaâ—ly how much more delight some have these â—gs below and the remembrance of them â—en unto me then the things above how â—ch sweeter hath sin been to me then grace â—â— how have I bent my will against thy great â—â— holy will in all things how willingly and how fast O Lord did I run in the ways â—ternal destruction and how good Lord â— I vehemently delighted and laboured to â— others to commit the same sins and to dâ— same things how easily and how willingly â— believe the suggestions of the Devil and â— what willingness have I left thy work â— how often good Lord to do his nay wâ— is yet worse how often have I tempted him tempter to tempt me unto sin when I knew â— the wages of sin was death even Tempâ— Spiritual and Eternal for body and soul dâ— my very utmost to destroy both But what O Lord are all these sins those I do not to those I cannot remember â— that both for greatness and multitude yea wâ— are all the sins I have committed to thâ— would have committed had'st not thou in lâ— and in mercy O most gracious loving â— most mercifull Father in Jesus Christ â— strained me and come in continually unto help and succour even when I was altogetâ— helpless and succourless thou did'st O Loâ— own me when I would not own thee thou diâ— run after me when I did my utmost to run frâ— thee thou did'st O Lord continue knockiâ— when I would not open to thee and wert'st â—tented such was thy endearing loving love â— to me to stand at the door of my
as able as willing as great as good and as good as great nothing can hinder thee nothing can deprive thee of being what thou art for before any thing was thou wert all things have their all from thee thou art the Alpha and the Omega the beginning and the end it is the greatest and the chiefest joy of all the Angels and Saints in Heaven and on Earth that thou art what thou art and that they belong unto thee and that thou art pleased to own them for thine own thy glory is their glory thine end their aim thy will their wills their chief desire to be is to please thee O God to please thee and to adore thee without thee we know we can do nothing nor should be nothing thou O Lord God art our all and our all for all our springs are in thee and from thee And now O Lord God I come at this time before thee to speak a word unto thee but I find my self as unable as unfit and as unfit as unable being empty of all good and full fit and ready for any or all evils such O Lord thou knowest is my wretched and miserable nature averse unto all that is good and prone unto all that is evil but thou O my God in Jesus Christ that art all good and able to do all good fill O Lord fill I humbly beseech thee my empty heart with thy self even with thy fulness that I may speak unto thee thine own words and not mine own for mine own words would be but words but meer words but thy words even thine O God are works and work I know effectually thou do'st not hear us for our words sake because they are but the words of men not for our works sake because they are but mens works nor for our own sake because we have forsaken thee but for thy great names sake O Lord which is thy self and therefore for thine own sake thou hearest us Ah Lord God let me then so hear thy voice as my soul may live and so live as to praise thee O Lord is to live yea to live in thee to thee and for thee which to do Ah Lord thou knowest is the desire I have to live Ah great God be thou then graciously pleased in the abundance of thy great goodness to speak a word in season unto this dull dead senceless heart of mine that I may be so ravisht therewith as I may forthwith come out of my self flye from my self hate loath and abhor my self in dust and ashes cause me O Lord to consider my self as indeed I am which is a little creeping clay speaking earth a worm and no man vile sinfull wretched and abominable from the Crown of the head to the sole of the foot there is no whole part in me I am more Leprous then Gehazy much more unclean then was Mary Magdalen more blind in soul then Bartemeus was in body more lame to run after thee O Lord in thy ways then was Mephibosheth in his feet my soul runs with a greater flux of Sin then was the Hemorish Issue and more then thirty eight years O Lord thou knowest all these diseases have been upon me Ah Lord my Lord and my God be thou therefore pleased in love and mercy to look upon me with one of thine eyes and heal me and thou shalt do as great a work as in curing them all I know and am assured that thou hast so great a skill that if thou wilt thou canst with a word forgive the one and heal the other Ah wonder of wonders yea too too wonderfull to believe but by those whom thou dwellest in that thou wilt dwell and delight to dwell in such a heart but all such know O Lord through the power of thy goodness and the working of thy holy spirit in their hearts that nothing is hard for thee O God to do but all things are as easie as possible thou bringest light out of darkness and turnest evil into good with the word of thy mouth for he is only worthy whom thou in favour accountest worthy Seeing then O Lord God that it is thy good will and pleasure to do so much for me as thou canst do which is to give me thine own self be thou Ah be thou pleased in the riches of thy mercy and free grace to accept of my self not as a recompence O Lord for this thy great gift but as an Acknowledgment that I have received so great a gift from thee and that therefore I am no longer nor no more mine own nor any others either in Heaven or on Earth but thine own O Lord and thine all and I most humbly and most unfeignedly beseech thee from the bottom of my heart in Jesus Christ that it may so continue and be unto all Eternity and that I may not henceforth think speak or do any thing by my self from my self alone without thee O Lord but that all my thoughts words and actions may be wholly guided and govern'd by thee to do all things agreeable to thy holy will and according to thine own heart who art the heart of my heart the life of my life and the Soul of my Soul for by thee only and all one I live move and have my being Give me then grace O Lord God that I may so love thee as to adore thee so fear thee as not offend thee so delight in thee as that thou mâ—yest be my only delight so obey thee as to be obedient unto the death so honour thee as to walk humbly before thee and give up my self unto thee let me so run after thee as to obtain thee and get a blessing from thee which may be a blessing unto me in life in death and after death that by receiving from thee daily grace I may give thee daily glory Ah Lord thou knowest how my heart seeketh to find thee that I may enjoy thee who art and who only art the joy and rejoycing of my heart that I may love thee fear thee adore thee praise thee prize thee and give my self unto thee who hast given thy self for me and to me O Lord thou art all things and givest all things unto all Creatures all things have their all from thee who art all in all in all things thou art O Lord brighter and much more glorious then the Sun for the glorious brightness of the Sun is from the brightenss of thy glory the Heavens have their beauty from thy beautifulness the Earth and the Sea their plenty and fulness from thy plentiful fulness all the Creatures have all their strength from thy strength and man his power might and wisdom to govern them and all things under the Sun from thine Almighty power and wisdom Ah most glorious Lord God who art thus glorious to behold how can I Worm behold thy glory or thee O Lord the Lord of all glory I confess and acknowledge that I am not able of my self to know my self my vileness
wretchedness emptiness and nothingness how then O Lord am I able to know thee or to consider thee as thou art in thy self and how much thy goodness exceeds my badness thy wisdom my folly thy strength my weakness thy fulness my emptiness thine Almightiness my nothingness and yet how content am I though nothing or less worth then nothing yea to be turned even into nothing for thy sake But seeing O Lord thou hast in thy great goodness love and mercy made me thine make me now O Lord even what thou wilt and sent me whether thou wilt I am ready and willing to go and be and do and suffer yea to spend and to be spent for thee for thou knowest O Lord God if I desire to live it is to live to thee in thee and for thee to praise thee and for thy praise for to praise thee is to live and this to do only is the only desire I have to live for when I have thee Lord I have all that I desire and crave thy presence being my Heaven on Earth and thy absence my Hell having thee O Lord I have my all but wanting thee I want all that I would have thou only art able to content to satisfie and to please me but nothing but thee nothing out of thee nothing besides thee O my God yea all things besides thee cannot give me any true pleasure delight or contentment O give me then so thy self my sweet Jesus as I may be always with thee never without thee that I may wholly give up my self unto thee to be more holy like unto thee that my heart may be according to thine own heart and that thou may'st delight thine heart O Lord to set thine heart upon me and to make me thy delight thy joy and thy Crown of glory and to love me and to do me good even with that goodness of heart with thine own goodness wherewith thou lovest thine own that my will may in all things be conformable and made subject to thy will to will all that thou willest willingly and to nill all that thou nillest with the same willing will And grant O Lord that mine eyes may be always open to behold thee mine ears to hear thee my mouth to praise thee mine arms to imbrace thee my feet to run after thee and my heart heartily to love honour fear and adore thee so that all my members and faculties both in soul and body may be as instruments only to act thy motions that I may be out of love with all that I may be only in love with thee who art all love and only lovely my dear my sweet and saving Saviour Jesus Ah Lord God make me willing to give my self up unto the that did'st so willingly give up thy self for me and to be made like unto me that I might be made like unto thee thou rejoyced'st O Lord to come down from Heaven on Earth to lift me up from Earth into Heaven to live a mortal life on Earth that I might live an immortal life in Heaven to dye on Earth to free me from Eternal death and to give me Eternal life thou wert O Lord made subject to all infirmities on Earth to confirm and make me for ever free from them in Heaven seeing then thou wert O Lord willing to come to me in blood even through thine own blood to wash me out of my blood and to make me for ever clean Ah Lord wash not my hands and my feet only but my head and my heart out also even my bloody heart that hath delighted so much and so often to make thy innocent heart to bleed yea to shed the last drop of blood that was in thy heart Thou would'st O Christ thou would'st wear an ignominious Crown of Thornes here on earth that I might wear a glorious Crown of Glory hereafter in Heaven thou would'st O Christ thou would'st be whip'd that thy stripes might heal me thou would'st thou would'st O Christ be bound to loose me and set me free thou would'st O Christ thou would'st be accurst that I might be for ever blest thou would'st O Christ thou would'st have thine arms nail'd abroad to shew the breadth of thy love thy feet nail'd to shew the length of thy love and thy head pierst with Thorns to shew the height of thy love and thy heart opened with a spear to shew the depth of thy love Ah breadth length height and depth of love that such a God would be thus wounded to heal such a man as I am thus accurst to make me blest thus bound to make me free thus made an heir of misery to make me an heir of mercy thus to drink the dreggs of his Fathers Divine wrath that I might for ever drink in the streams and of the Ocean of his Divine love Ah love beyond degree an offended God thus dyes to set offending men free And thus hath God the Lord my Lord and my God freed me from Eternal pains and given me hopes here and assurance hereafter of Eternal joys he hath brought me out of the neither Hell into the upper Heaven of grace here which shall be glory hereafter he hath freed he hath freed me from Eternal death and purchased for me Eternal life he hath broken he hath broken the chains of sin by which Satan held me and led me captive at his will and doth lead me forth by and with the chains of his Eternal and everlasting love enabling me through grace to do his own holy will And what Lord shall I render unto thee for all these thy benefits thou Lord knowest my unabillity and my poverty I am I am I confess so poor yea so despicably poor O Lord as I have nothing to pay thee nor can pay thee nothing but what thou shalt give me give me then O Lord what thou wilt have me to give thee give me Oh give me I humbly beseech thee in Jesus Christ love to love thee fear to fear thee faith to believe in thee to depend on thee and to rowl my self upon thee hope to trust in thee and joy to rejoyce in thee with joy unspeakable Ah Lord God give me thy self yea all thy self that I may give thee all my self and though I do I confess already owe thee mine all yet I would willingly owe thee yet more and though I have nothing to pay thee yet I desire and heartily desire to owe the more to be more indebted unto thee for I delight to be thy great debtor yea and would be thy greatest and so I confess I should be though thou shouldest neither give nor forgive me any more then thou hast already forgiven and given me Ah Lord I know that for all thy gifts of grace mercy pardon and forgiveness that thou expecteth only an acknowledgement that I am thine all and that I owe thee my self and mine all the freedom Lord Ah Lord the freedom all the freedom all the freedom that I desire is to be thy
of my natural darkness which is darker than the blackest night and be also unto me a fire by day in the mid'st of thine own light in me which is clearer and brighter than the brightest day that I may burn O God in the Sacred and Divine flames of saving knowledge and obedience unto my lives end 16. Instruct me O Lord in thine own Laws and write them so upon my heart that I may never depart from them 17. Feast me and fill me O Lord so with thine own self that I may be all thine and thou all mine 18. It is the spirit of Christ or Christ in the Spirit which is perfect God living in us that Gal. 3. 27. makes us Christians which is to be like Christ to be Baptized in him to have put him on and this oneness with Christ God is in all the Saints all the Saints are thus one in God with Christ he in us and we in him MEDITATIONS ON DEATH HOW It appears to the Godly and to the Wicked after a great Sickness ALL happiness is in Christ and in possessing of him and there is no true happiness out of Christ All the whole world is much too little and too low to be compared to Christ and to the living in him Though he should want bread to eat and Cloaths to put on Christ I am sure alone will satisfie and truly please and content any man A naked Christ a poor Christ that is a Christ that shall bring nakedness and if as with Job Poverty and uncomliness he will be to a Soul that truly knows him the fairest of ten thousand without spot or wrinkle the only fair and beautiful the only desirable the whole and only desires the riches honour treasure and pleasure of all souls that truly know him A soul that truly knows Christ cannot live as he would without a farther knowledge of him living in him to have Communion and fellowship with him which is of more value to him and he prizeth it more than ten thousand worlds and lives Christ being above all things and more than all things much by much A Christians last hour is his best hour the hour of his Death is the best hour of all his life yea that hour is the true beginning of life for Death sin and Hell are swallowed up into Victory and the Devil totally and finally overcome Death is advantagious unto a Christian divers wayes when he dyes then he begins to live in the Lord who is the Lord of life and glory then he shall in a very great measure know feel and see the unspeakable love of God to him but I conceive not altogether so as it is in God that shall even surpass our knowledge there for we shall be swallowed up into it and be filled with it it shall contain us but we shall not be able to contain it and there shall we have continual and perfect love to love God perfectly and continually even as he would have us to love him which is the continual fulfilling the whole Law and which will make us of all things most like himself for God is love and surely it is the most lovely grace of all graces both on earth as well as in Heaven and so through grace I have found it Ah let us never then pray against Death which brings us these and a thousand more Heavenly advantages but rather be prepared to meet it with joy and embrace it as our best friend next to Christ Ah how sweet is Death even almost as Heaven to that soul that is housed in God and hath his peace made sure with him Death to such a soul is much better than any life Ah how sweet is Death to that soul that knows Heaven is prepared for him and finds and feels himself prepared for Heaven and sees his Saviour with his blessed arms spread abroad to welcome and embrace him and his glorious head bowed down to kiss him and he nigh him to receive him into his Everlasting Habitation of rest joy and peace Death at the worst is but a sweet sleep to the body to him that dyes in the Lord for he rests from all his labours but it is life to the soul and it shall ever live in and with the Lord of life and Glory I am sure to a good Christian that is such a one as is in some measure like Christ that lives and walks and doth as far as he is able as Christ did when he was here in the flesh the thoughts of death and its being not far off bring him the most joy next to the Glory of God and his interest in him by Christ Ah how sweet is death to that soul that knows himself to be long since dead to all sin Death is sweet to all such souls because he be-friends them so much as in a moment to house them in the blessed arms of their blessed Redeemer Christ Jesus Death is sweet to them that are in Christ because he carries them in a moment to live in his presence for ever and for ever and to enjoy him as he is to be enjoyed and to be made like him glorious as he is glorious though not so glorious Death is to all that are in Christ as Elijah's Chariot of fire which purifies them and expels all the remainder of Corruption that is within them that is by death all evil is done away we are no more capable of sin by death death is destroyed and life appears But Death to the wicked is the Devils Chariot sent from Hell to bring them quickly there as Jehu's Chariot it drives them furiously thither from whence none is able to deliver Death to the Godly is a Consuming fire to all their sins they shall not ever more be seen or remembred but it is a fire as from Gods Altar to purifie their graces and to make them shine more radiant than the Sun after death they shall in a moment be made perfectly pure and purely perfect and ever so abide But Death to the Wicked is that fire of Hell that shall consume all the good that ever they did so as it shall not nor cannot be seen nor remembred but it will make all the evil that ever they committed either in thought word or deed to be ever before the eyes of God and all the blessed in Heaven and before the Devils and all the damned and their own as if writ with a beam of the Sun Death to those that are in Christ brings them to hear that sweet and ever blessed voice of Christ himself come ye blessed inherit the Kingdom prepared for you from all Eternity and well done good and faithfulâ— Servant enter thou into the joy of thy Lord. But death to the Wicked will bring them in a moment for ever to hear that most doleful voice from the mouth of Christ go ye cursed with whom with the Devil and his Angels into everlasting burning into that fire that cannot be quenched which