couerture Should be cast foorth into the open fieldes For Birds and Rauens to deuoure at will Thinking if they bare euery one of them A bill full of his flesh into their nests He would not rise to trouble him in haste Will Summer A vertuous sonne and I le lay my life on 't he was a Caualiere and a good fellow Winter Pleaseth your honor all he sayes is false For my owne part I loue good husbandrie But hate dishonourable couetize Youth ne're aspires to vertues perfect growth Till his wilde oates be sowne and so the earth Vntill his weeds be rotted with my frosts Is not for any seede or tillage fit He must be purged that hath surfeited The fields haue surfeited with Summer fruites They must be purg'd made poore opprest with snow Ere they recouer their decayed pride For ouerbarring of the streames with Ice Who locks not poyson from his childrens taste When Winter raignes the water is so colde That it is poyson present death to those That wash or bathe their lims in his colde streames The slipprier that wayes are vnder vs The better it makes vs to heed our steps And looke e're we presume too rashly on If that my sonnes haue misbehau'd themselues A Gods name let them answer 't fore my Lord Autumne Now I beseech your honor it may be so Summer With all my heart Vertumnus go for them Wil Summer This same Harry Baker is such a necessary fellow to go on arrants as you shall not finde in a country It is pitty but he should haue another siluer arrow if it be but for crossing the stage with his cap on Summer To wearie out the time vntill they come Sing me some dolefull ditty to the Lute That may complaine my neere approching death The Song Adieu farewell earths blisse This world vncertaine is Fond are lifes lustfull ioyes Death proues them all but toyes None from his darts can flye I am sick I must dye Lord haue mercy on vs Rich men trust not in wealth Gold cannot buy you health Phisick himselfe must fade All things to end are made The plague full swift goes hye I am sick I must dye Lord haue mercy on vs Beauty is but a flowre Which wrinckles will deuoure Brightnesse falls from the ayre Queenes haue died yong and faire Dust hath closde Helens eye I am sick I must dye Lord haue mercy on vs Strength stoopes vnto the graue Wormes feed on Hector braue Swords may not fight with fate Earth still holds ope her gate Come come the bells do crye I am sick I must dye Lord haue mercy on vs VVit with his wantonnesse Tasteth deaths bitternesse Hels executioner Hath no eares for to heare VVhat vaine art can reply I am sick I must dye Lord haue mercy on vs Haste therefore eche degree To welcome destiny Heauen is our heritage Earth but a players stage Mount wee vnto the sky I am sick I must dye Lord haue mercy on vs Summer Beshrew mee but thy song hath moued mee Will Summer Lord haue mercy on vs how lamentable 't is Enter Vertumnus with Christmas and Backwinter Vertumnus I haue dispatcht my Lord I haue brought you them you sent mee for Will Sūmer. What saist thou hast thou made a good batch I pray thee giue mee a new loafe Summer Christmas how chaūce thou com'st not as the rest Accompanied with some musique or some song A merry Carroll would haue grac't thee well Thy ancestors haue vs'd it heretofore Christmas I antiquity was the mother of ignorance this latter world that sees but with her spectacles hath spied a pad in those sports more then they could Summer What is 't against thy conscience for to sing Christmas No nor to say by my troth if I may get a good bargaine Summer Why thou should'st spend thou should'st not care to get Christmas is god of hospitality Christmas So will he neuer be of good husbandry I may say to you there is many an old god that is now growne out of fashion So is the god of hospitality Summer What reason canst thou giue he should be left Christmas No other reason but that Gluttony is a sinne too many dunghils are infectious A mans belly was not made for a poudring beefe tub to feede the poore twelue dayes let them starue all the yeare after would but stretch out the guts wider then they should be so make famine a bigger den in their bellies then he had before I should kill an oxe haue some such fellow as Milo to come and eate it vp at a mouth-full Or like the Sybarites do nothing all one yeare but bid ghestes against the next yeare The scraping of trenchers you thinke would put a man to no charges It is not a hundreth pound a yeare would serue the scullions in dishclouts My house stands vpon vaults it will fall if it be ouer-loden with a multitude Besides haue you neuer read of a city that was vnderminde and destroyed by Mowles So say I keepe hospitalitie and a whole faire of beggers bid me to dinner euery day what with making legges when they thanke me at their going away and setling their wallets handsomly on their backes they would shake as many lice on the ground as were able to vndermine my house and vndoe me vtterly It is their prayers would builde it againe if it were ouerthrowne by this vermine would it I pray who begun feasting and gourmandize first but Sardanapalus Nero Heliogabalus Commodus tyrāts whoremasters vnthrifts Some call them Emperours but I respect no crownes but crownes in the purse Any mā may weare a siluer crowne that hath made a fray in Smithfield lost but a peece of his braine pan And to tell you plaine your golden crownes are little better in substance and many times got after the same sort Summer Grosse-headed sot how light he makes of state Autumne Who treadeth not on stars when they are fallen Who talketh not of states when they are dead A foole conceits no further then he sees He hath no scence of ought but what he feeles Christmas I I such wise men as you come to begge at such fooles doores as we be Autumne Thou shutst thy dore how should we beg of thee No almes but thy sincke carries from thy house Wil Summer And I can tell you that 's as plentifull almes for the plague as the sheriffes tub to them of Newgate Autumne For feasts thou keepest none cankers thou feedst The wormes will curse thy flesh another day Because it yeeldeth them no fatter pray Christmas What wormes do another day I care not but I le be sworne vpon a whole Kilderkin of single Beere I will not haue a worme-eaten nose like a Pursiuant while I liue Feasts ere but puffing vp of the flesh the purueyers for diseases trauell cost time ill spent O it were a trim thing to send as the Romanes did round about the world for prouision for one banquet I must rigge ships
knight Bac. Rise vp Sir Robert Tospot Here he dubs Will Summer with the black Iacke Sum, No more of this I hate it to the death No such deformer of the soule and sence As is this swynish damn'd-borne drunkennes Bacchus for thou abusest so earths fruits Impris'ned liue in cellars and in vawtes Let none commit their counsels vnto thee Thy wrath be fatall to thy dearest friends Vnarmed runne vpon thy foemens swords Neuer feare any plague before it fall Dropsies and watry tympanies haunt thee Thy lungs with surfeting be putrified To cause thee haue an odious stinking breath Slauer and driuell like a child at mouth Bee poore and beggerly in thy old age Let thy owne kinsmen laugh when thou complaynst And many teares gayne nothing but blind scoffes This is the guerdon due to drunkennes Shame sicknes misery followe excesse Bacchus Now on my honor Sim Summer thou art a bad member a Dunse a mungrell to discredit so worshipfull an arte after this order Thou hast curst me and I will blesse thee Neuer cup of Nipitaty in London come neere thy niggardly habitation I beseech the gods of good fellowship thou maist fall into a consumption with drinking smal beere Euery day maist thou eate fish and let it sticke in the midst of thy maw for want of a cup of wine to swim away in Venison be Venenum to thee may that Vintner haue the plague in his house that sels thee a drop of claret to kill the poyson of it As many wounds maist thou haue as Casar had in the Senate house and get no white wine to wash them with And to conclude pine away in melancholy and sorrow before thou hast the fourth part of a dramme of my Iuice to cheare vp thy spirits Summer Hale him away he barketh like a wolfe It is his drinke not hee that rayles on vs Bacchus Nay soft brother Summer back with that foote here is a snuffe in the bottome of the Iack inough to light a man to bed withall wee 'le leaue no flocks behind vs whatsoeuer wee doe Summer Go dragge him hence I say when I commaund Bacchus Since we must needs goe let 's goe merrily Farewell sir Robert Tosse-pot sing amayne Mounsieur Myngo whilest I mount vp my Asse Here they goe out singing Mounsieur Myngo as they came in Will Summer Of all gods this Bacchus is the ill-fauourd'st misshapen god that euer I sawe A poxe on him he hath cristned me with a newe nickname of sir Robert Tosse-pot that will not part frō me this twelmonth Ned fooles clothes are so perfumde with the beere he powrd on me that there shall not be a Dutchmā within 20 mile but he 'le smel out claime kindred of him What a beastly thing is it to bottle vp ale in a mās belly whē a man must set his guts on a gallō pot last only to purchase the alehouse title of a boone companion Carowse pledge me and you dare S'wounds I le drinke with thee for all that euer thou art worth It is euē as 2. men should striue who should run furthest into the sea for a wager Me thinkes these are good houshold termes Wil it please you to be here sir I cōmend me to you shall I be so bold as trouble you sauing your tale I drink to you And if these were put in practise but a yeare or two in tauernes wine would soone fall from six and twentie pound a tunne and be beggers money a penie a quart and take vp his Inne with wast beere in the almes tub I am a sinner as others I must not say much of this argument Euerie one when hee is whole can giue aduice to them that are sicke My masters you that be good fellowes get you into corners and soupe off your prouender closely report hath a blister on her tongue open tauerns are tel-tales Non peccat quicunque potest peccasse negare Summer I le call my seruants to account said I A bad account worse seruants no man hath Quos credis sides effuge tutus eris The prouerbe I haue prou'd to be too true Totidem domi hostes habemus quot seruos And that wise caution of Democritus Seruns necessaria possessio non autem dulcis No where fidelitie and labour dwels Hope yong heads count to build on had I wist Conscience but few respect all hunt for gaine Except the Cammell haue his prouender Hung at his mouth he will not trauell on Tyresias to Narcissus promised Much prosperous hap and many golden daies If of his beautie he no knowledge tooke Knowledge breeds pride pride breedeth discontent Blacke discontent thou vrgest to reuenge Reuenge opes not her eares to poore mens praiers That dolt destruction is she without doubt That hales her foorth and feedeth her with nought Simplicitie and plainnesse you I loue Hence double diligence thou mean'st deceit Those that now serpent-like creepe on the ground And seeme to eate the dust they crowch so low If they be disappointed of their pray Most traiterously will trace their tailes and sting Yea such as like the Lapwing build their nests In a mans dung come vp by drudgerie Will be the first that like that foolish bird Will follow him with yelling and false cries Well sung a shepheard that now sleepes in skies Dumbe swaines do loue not vaine chattering pies In mountaines Poets say Eccho is hid For her deformitie and monstrous shape Those mountaines are the houses of great Lords Where Scenter with his hundreth voices sounds A hundreth trumpes at once with rumor fild A woman they imagine her to be Because that sexe keepes nothing close they heare And that 's the reason magicke writers frame There are more witches women then of men For women generally for the most part Of secrets more desirous of then men Which hauing got they haue no power to hold In these times had Ecchoes first fathers liu'd No woman but a man she had beene faind Though women yet will want no newes to prate For men meane men the skumme drosse of all Will talke and babble of they know not what Vpbraid depraue and taunt they care not whom Sumises passe for sound approued truthes Familiaritie and conference That were the sinewes of societies Are now for vnderminings onely vsde And novell wits that loue none but themselues Thinke wisedomes height as falshood slily couch't Seeking each other to o'rethrow his mate O friendship thy old temple is defac't Embrasing euery guilefull curtesie Hath ouergrowne fraud-wanting honestie Examples liue but in the idle schooles Sinon beares all the sway in princes courts Sicknes be thou my soules phisition Bring the Apothecarie death with thee In earth is hell true hell felicitie Compared with this world the den of wolues Aut. My Lord you are too passionate without cause Winter Grieue not for that which cannot be recal'd Is it your seruants carelesnesse you plaine Tullie by one of his owne slaues was slaine The husbandman close in his bosome
nurst A subtill snake that after wrought his bane Autumne Seruos fideles liberalitaes facit Where on the contrarie seruitutem Those that attend vpon illiberall Lords Whose couetize yeelds nought els but faire lookes Euen of those faire lookes make their gainfull vse For as in Ireland and in Denmarke both Witches for gold will sell a man a wind Which in the corner of a napkin wrapt Shall blow him safe vnto what coast he will So make ill seruants sale of their Lords wind Which wrapt vp in a piece of parchment Blowes many a knaue forth danger of the law Summer Inough of this let me go make my will Ah it is made although I hold my peace These two will share betwixt them what I haue The surest way to get my will perform'd Is to make my executour my heire And he if all be giuen him and none els Vnfallibly will see it well perform'd Lyons will feed though none bid them go to Ill growes the tree affordeth ne're a graft Had I some issue to sit in my throne My griefe would die death should not heare mee grone But when perforce these must enioy my wealth Which thanke me not but enter 't as a pray Bequeath'd it is not but cleane cast away Autumne be thou successor of my seat Hold take my crowne looke how he graspes for it Thou shalt not haue it yet but hold it too Why should I keep that needs I must forgo Winter Then dutie laid aside you do me wrong I am more worthie of it farre then he He hath no skill nor courage for to rule A weather-beaten banckrout asse it is That scatters and consumeth all he hath Eche one do plucke from him without controll He is nor hot nor cold a sillie soule That faine would please eche party if so he might He and the spring are schollers fauourites What schollers are what thriftles kind of men Your selfe be iudge and iudge of him by them When Cerberus was headlong drawne from hell He voided a blacke poison from his mouth Called Aconitum whereof inke was made That inke with reeds first laid on dried barkes Seru'd men a while to make rude workes withall Till Hermes secretarie to the Gods Or Hermes Trismegistus as some will Wearie with grauing in blind characters And figures of familiar beasts and plants Inuented letters to write lies withall In them he pend the fables of the Gods The gyants warre and thousand tales besides After eche nation got these toyes in vse There grew vp certaine drunken parasites Term'd Poets which for a meales meat or two Would promise monarchs immortalitie They vomited in verse all that they knew Found causes and beginnings of the world Fetcht pedegrees of mountaines and of flouds From men and women whom the Gods transform'd If any towne or citie they pass'd by Had in compassion thinking them mad men Forborne to whip them or imprison them That citie was not built by humane hands T' was raisde by musique like Megara walles Apollo poets patron founded it Because they found one fitting fauour there Musaeus Lynus Homer Orpheus Were of this trade and thereby wonne their fame Will. Summer Famamalum quo non velocius vllum Winter Next them a company of ragged knaues Sun-bathing beggers lazie hedge-creepers Sleeping face vpwards in the fields all night Dream'd strange deuices of the Sunne and Moone And they like Gipsies wandring vp and downe Told fortunes iuggled nicknam'd all the starres And were of idiots term'd Philosophers Such was Pithagoras the silencer Prometheus Thales Milesius Who would all things of water should be made Anaximander Anaximenes That positiuely said the aire was God Zenocrates that said there were eight Gods And Cratoniates Alcmeon too Who thought the Sun and Moone stars were gods The poorer sort of them that could get nought Profest like beggerly Franciscan Friers And the strict order of the Capouchins A voluntarie wretched pouertie Contempt of gold thin fare and lying hard Yet he that was most vehement in these Diogenes the Cinicke and the Dogge Was taken coyning money in his Cell Wil Summer What an olde Asse was that Me thinks hee should haue coynde Carret rootes rather for as for money he had no vse for except it were to melt and soder vp holes in his tub withall Winter It were a whole Olimpiades worke to tell How many diuillish ergo armed arts Sprung all as vices of this Idlenesse For euen as souldiers not imployde in warres But liuing loosely in a quiet state Not hauing wherewithall to maintaine pride Nay scarce to finde their bellies any foode Nought but walke melancholie and deuise How they may cousen Marchants fleece young heires Creepe into fauour by betraying men Robbe churches beg waste toyes court city dames Who shall vndoe their husbands for their sakes The baser rabble how to cheate and steale And yet be free from penaltie of death So those word-warriers lazy star-gazers Vsde to no labour but to lowze themselues Had their heads fild with coosning fantasies They plotted how to make their pouertie Better esteemde of then high Soueraignty They thought how they might plant a heauē on earth Whereof they would be principall lowe gods That heauen they called Contemplation As much to say as a most pleasant slouth Which better I cannot compare then this That if a fellow licensed to beg Should all his life time go from faire to faire And buy gape-seede hauing no businesse else That contemplation like an aged weede Engendred thousand sects and all those sects Were but as these times cunning shrowded rogues Grammarians some and wherein differ they From beggers that professe the Pedlers French The Poets next slouinly tatterd slaues That wander and sell Ballets in the streetes Historiographers others there be And the like lazers by the high way side That for a penny or a halfe-penny Will call each knaue a good fac'd Gentleman Giue honor vnto Tinkers for good Ale Preferre a Cobler fore the Black prince farre If he bestowe but blacking of their shooes And as it is the Spittle-houses guise Ouer the gate to write their founders names Or on the outside of their walles at least In hope by their examples others moou'd Will be more bountifull and liberall So in the forefront of their Chronicles Or Peroratione operis They learnings benefactors reckon vp Who built this colledge who gaue that Free-schoole What King or Queene aduaunced Schollers most And in their times what writers flourished Rich men and magistrates whilest yet they liue They flatter palpably in hope of gayne Smooth-tounged Orators the fourth in place Lawyers our common-wealth intitles them Meere swash-bucklers and ruffianly mates That will for twelue pence make a doughtie fray Set men for strawes together by the eares Skie measuring Mathematicians Golde-breathing Alcumists also we haue Both which are subtill witted humorists That get their meales by telling miracles Which they haue seene in trauailing the skies Vaine boasters lyers make-shifts they are all Men that remoued from their inkehorne
termes Bring forth no action worthie of their bread What should I speake of pale physicions Who as Fismenus non nasatus was Vpon a wager that his friends had laid Hir'de to liue in a priuie a whole yeare So are they hir'de for lucre and for gaine All their whole life to smell on excrements Wil. Summer Very true for I haue heard it for a prouerbe many a time and oft Hunc os fatidum fah he stinkes like a phisicion Winter Innumerable monstrous practises Hath loytring contemplation brought forth more Which t' were too long particular to recite Suffice they all conduce vnto this end To banish labour nourish slothfulnesse Pamper vp lust deuise newfangled sinnes Nay I will iustifie there is no vice Which learning and vilde knowledge brought not in Or in whose praise some learned haue not wrote The arte of murther Machiauel hath pend Whoredome hath Ouid to vphold her throne And Aretine of late in Italie Whose Cortigiana toucheth bawdes their trade Gluttonie Epicurus doth defend And bookes of th' arte of cookerie confirme Of which Platina hath not writ the least Drunkennesse of his good behauiour Hath testimoniall from where he was borne That pleasant worke de arte bibendi A drunken Dutchman spued out few yeares since Nor wanteth sloth although sloths plague bee want His paper pillers for to leane vpon The praise of nothing pleades his worthinesse Follie Erasmus sets a flourish on For baldnesse a bald asse I haue forgot Patcht vp a pamphletarie periwigge Slouenrie Grobianus magnifieth Sodomitrie a Cardinall commends And Aristotle necessarie deemes In briefe all bookes diuinitie except Are nought but tales of the diuels lawes Poyson wrapt vp in sugred words Mans pride damnations props the worlds abuse Then censure good my Lord what bookemen are If they be pestilent members in a state He is vnfit to sit at sterne of state That fauours such as will o'rethrow his state Blest is that gouernment where no arte thriues Vox populi vex Dei The vulgars voice it is the voice of God Yet Tully saith Non est consilium in vulgo non ratio non discrimen non differentia The vulgar haue no learning wit nor sence The hauing spent all his time In studie of Philosophie and artes And noting well the vanitie of them Wisht with repentance for his follie past Some would teach him th' arte of obliuion How to forget the arts that he had learnd And Cicero whom we alleadg'd before As saith Valerius stepping into old age Despised learning lothed eloquence Naso that could speake nothing but pure verse And had more wit then words to vtter it And words as choise as euer Poet had Cride and exclaimde in bitter agonie When knowledge had corrupted his chaste mind Discite qui sapitis non haec qua scimus inertes Sed trepidas acies fera bella sequi You that be wise and euer meane to thriue O studie not these toyes we sluggards vse But follow armes and waite on barbarous warres Young men yong boyes beware of Schoolemasters They will infect you marre you bleare your eyes They seeke to lay the curse of God on you Namely confusion of languages Wherewith those that the towre of Babel built Accursed were in the worldes infancie Latin it was the speech of Infidels Logique hath nought to say in a true cause Philosophie is curiositie And Socrates was therefore put to death Onely for he was a Philosopher Abhorre contemne despise these damned snares Will Summer Out vpon it who would be a Scholler not I I promise you my minde alwayes gaue me this learning was such a filthy thing which made me hate it so as I did when I should haue beene at schoole construing Batte mi fili mi fili mi Batte I was close vnder a hedge or vnder a barne wall playing at spanne Counter or Iacke in a boxe my master beat me my father beat me my mother gaue me bread and butter yee all this would not make me a squitter-booke It was my destinie I thanke her as a most courteous goddesse that shee hath not cast me away vpon gibridge O in what a mightie vaine am I now against Horne-bookes Here before all this companie I professe my selfe on open enemy to Inke and paper I le make it good vpon the Accidence body that In speech is the diuels Pater noster Nownes and Pronounes I pronounce you as traitors to boyes buttockes Syntaxis and Prosodia you are tormenters of wit good for nothing but to get a schoolemaster two pence a weeke Hang copies flye out phrase books let pennes be turnd to picktooths bowles cards dice you are the true liberal sciēces I le ne're be Goosequil gentlemē while I liue Sūmer. Winter with patience vnto my griefe I haue attended thy inuectiue tale So much vntrueth wit neuer shadowed Gainst her owne bowels thou Arts weapons turn'st Let none beleeue thee that will euer thriue Words haue their course the winde blowes where it lists He erres alone in error that persists For thou gainst Autumne such exceptions tak'st I graunt his ouer-seer thou shalt be His treasurer protector and his staffe He shall do nothing without thy consent Prouide thou for his weale and his content Winter Thanks gracious Lord so I le dispose of him As it shall not repent you of your gift Autumne On such conditions no crowne will I take I challenge Winter for my enemie A most insaciate miserable carle That to fill vp his garners to the brim Cares not how he indammageth the earth What pouerty he makes it to indure He ouer-bars the christall streames with yee That none but he and his may drinke of them All for a fowle Back-winter he layes vp Hard craggie wayes and vncouth slippery paths He frames that passengers may slide and fall Who quaketh not that heareth but his name O but two sonnes he hath worse then himselfe Christmas the one a pinch-back cut-throate churle That keepes no open house as he should do Delighteth in no game or fellowship Loues no good deeds and hateth talke But sitteth in a corner turning Crabbes Or coughing o're a warmed pot of Ale Back-winter th' other that 's his none sweet boy Who like his father taketh in all points An elfe it is compact of enuious pride A miscreant borne for a plague to men A monster that deuoureth all he meetes Were but his father dead so he would raigne Yea he would go goodneere to deale by him As Nabuchodonozors vngratious sonne Euilmerodach by his father dealt Who when his sire was turned to an Oxe Full greedily snatcht vp his soueraigntie And thought himselfe a king without controwle So it fell out seuen yeares expir'de and gone Nabuchodonozor came to his shape againe And dispossest him of the regiment Which my young prince no little greeuing at When that his father shortly after dide Fearing lest he should come from death againe As he came from an Oxe to be a man Wil'd that his body spoylde of