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A74716 The last visitation: conflicts and death of Mr. Thomas Peacock batchellor of divinity, and fellow of Brasen-nose-Colledge in Oxford. Published by E B from the copie of that famous divine, Mr. Robert Bolton, late minister of Broughton in Northhampton-shire. Bolton, Robert, 1572-1631.; Bagshaw, Edward, 1629-1671. 1660 (1660) Wing B3514A; Thomason E2103_1; ESTC R210121 21,659 90

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his ●eeming forlone soul What with barkings of conscience and with the too heavy burthen of sinne vvaves of fearfull thoughts ●lustering blasts and surging storms of Gods heavy displeasure he vvas tossed turmoyled dashed aga●● the rocks of despaire and m●● then in danger of his souls s●● wrack happy were we if ●●ther through frowardnes 〈◊〉 blindenes of judgement we inconsiderately passe by or p●●phanely deride Gods jud●●ments by thinking that they ●ther happen casually or by f●●getting of them suddenly 〈◊〉 we could but rightly discerne 〈◊〉 we should finde nothing m●● profitable then to have the ●mage of this gracious thou●● now afflicted soul in our hear● Hereby we may see that t● righteous being scarcely save● there is no place for the wicked a●● ungodly to appeare And tru● we may think that God sent it ●●ven for our sake that we w●● whom it is too usuall to da● with the Lord might kno●● that it is a fearfull thing to fall in●o his hands Our faith is then ●ryed in earnest when as the Lord hideth his face from us For if we love God above all ●hings it cannot be but upon the ●osse of the relish of his favour ●r taste of his displeasure our ●ouls should be in bitternes prick●d tormented wounded thrust ●horow yea and swallowed up with desolation It is a wonder of the world how we care●ully will seek physick use dyet by any means to avoid a ●odily pang and how careles we ●re of the unsupportable fits of ●he souls mortall sicknes It is ●ot in our power to apprehend ●race when we will and a hard●r matter is it then we can con●eive to lift up a poor soul cast ●●wn with the sense of Gods wrath If a violent passion may so farre transport the min●● what may we think of this re●les trembling when the s● after long tossings seeth it 〈◊〉 drowned and wholly ov●●whelmed with the deluge 〈◊〉 sorrow proceeding from the ●verlasting threats and sha●● and confusion of face in 〈◊〉 presence of the Almighty Consider the body loaden f●● a burthen neither portable 〈◊〉 evitable and thence gather 〈◊〉 stranglings of an overladen so Consider a man ready to 〈◊〉 from an high Tower unto 〈◊〉 Earth and thence gather 〈◊〉 estate of another falling fr●● Heaven to Hell with a spiritu●● ruine Consider a childe wh●● the mother hideth her face fr●● it and terrifieth it with a B●●boe and herein take view of 〈◊〉 estate of a poor Christian wh● chiefest happines having therein ●onsisted to wit in being joyn●d and united to his Heavenly ●ather having now lost his pre●ence or being affrighted with ●he Devil as if he were ready to ●●y hands on him Consider ●he estate of a debtor cast off by ●is best Creditours and gather ●hat of a Christian being banker●●ut with his God Consider ●he estate of a man once in fa●our afterwards adjudged to ●eath by a Prince without hope ●f pardon or repriving and ga●her that of a Christian who ●fter his citation and arraign●ent at the Tribunal seat of God ●ands condemned and is whol●● deprived of obtaining pardon ●nd delivered into the hands of ●he Devil The Lord needs ●ot to seek wilde beasts to punish ●s or such like cruell executioners of his wrath to torment u● he may finde enough within us all the furyes and Devils cann●● invent a more greivous tormen● One by it apprehended needet● not more accusers or torment ours His many never-though● of sinne as if he stirred a nest 〈◊〉 wasps come buzzing about h● eares and as a man indebte● once laid hold of make him faster daily his loving friends ma● stand by the prison and call him but he being fast fettered canno● stirre forth You shall see hi● now in his purgatory not th● papisticall sinne-satisfying fict●on the Popes jayle but that h●● fiery furnace wherein the Lo●● trieth his metall whether it 〈◊〉 good or reprobate And su●pose that he had died at t●● worst as in the Lords justice 〈◊〉 might to the hardening of tho●● that will not be softened As no man should rather judge him by ●he inch of his death then the ●ength of his life so I for my part neither did in him nor doe ●n my self so much feare his death as I did and doe desire his life You may observe the ●ourses which God taketh in visiting his children to be divers some are comfortable and with●ut any great admixture of discomfort others heavy but without horrour others horrible ●et all of them are in the issue gracious But to leave any fur●her digression and to come again to the matter in hand When one came unto him he ●rake out into these words Oh ●ow wofull and miserable is my e●tate that thus must converse with ●el-hounds He being with these words strangely moved went to call some of his best ab●● friends to comfort him T● them he complayned that t● Lord had cursed him Being d●manded how he knew it he answered Why the event shewet● it It being replyed The● such and such were cursed h● answered I have no grace Ho● doe those then they once ha● none I was a foolish glorious H●pocrite It is against the course 〈◊〉 Gods proceeding to save me 〈◊〉 hath otherwise decreed he canno● Put your trust in God I canno● no more then an horse Doe yo● desire to beleive No more the● a post then an horsshoe I kno● you cannot deny but that yo● have sought Gods glory N●● sincerely There is a secret mi●ture of pride and hypocrisy ●ven in the best I have no mo● sense of grace then these curtain ●●en a goose then that block Let ●he testimony of your life past ●omfort you especially in the ●●lling of a Tutour I did the ●●sinesse thereof perfunctorily when 〈◊〉 handled hard Authours I came ●ten unprepared and read shame●●lly Be of good courage and ●●e Lord will comfort your ●eart It is ended there is no ●●ch matter Why doe you think ●o You shall see the event God ●ill yet bring it to passe Tush ●●sh trifles What doe you think ●f your former Doctrine Very ●ood Let it comfort you It ●●nnot You desire it could If 〈◊〉 might There is nothing un●ossible to God Which stands with ●is decree Oh oh miserable and ●ofull the burthen of my sinne ly●●th heavy upon me I doubt it will ●reak my heart Behold your ●omforts Nothing to me I pray you hold your peace doe not trou●● your self idly you vex me y● words are as daggers to my hea● Another time some of t●● younger sort said to him R●member Sir the good counse●● that you have given us heret●fore Those were ordinary Y●● may see many others in the li●● estate Not such as mine S●● David What doe you speak to 〈◊〉 of David Good Sir endeavo● to settle your minde Yes to pl●● with hell-hounds Will you pray I cannot You were wont her●tofore Yes by a custom and va● glory Suffer us to pray for yo● Take not the name of God in va●● by praying for a
Reprobate He you may see the glory of G●● preferred before his own salv●tion rather willing to have t●● means of his salvation neglecte● then the Lord dishonoured Su●●er us to pray for our selves ●ook to it you would now shew your ●aculty in praying Can you say Amen No but in a certain ge●●all fashion One prayed and ●n the mean time he rested most ●uietly I pray you saith he ●hen prayer was ended Goe ●ence to bed doe not trouble your ●lves in vain Let not the Devil ●elude you abusing your minde ●nd tongue I know you speak ●ot these words I wonder that ●ntelligent Scholars should speak ●hus We are perswaded you ●re in as good estate as our selves Look how it is with your selves in ●ruth One that watched with him asked him Sir how can you discern this change by the ●bsence of God if you never en●oyed his presence I thought I ●ad it once but now I see it is farre ●therwise But God deals with you as he dealt with the Churc● Isa 54.7 He forsook it a whil● and hid his face from it but I returned to it again and so 〈◊〉 doubt the case stands with yo● Never add not affliction to the a●flicted Oh me wretch groani●● pitifully Hope no worse 〈◊〉 your self then we doe of yo● All of us have seen cleerly whi●● way your carriage was still sen● after the spirit and we are ass●red that you will come to t●● spirit howsoever you seem t● have lost your way To a● particulars he would answer desire grace generally I did go●● outwardly all hypocritically O● asked him Doe you love such a one his most dear and wo●thy to be dear friend Yes Why For his goodnes Why then you a Gods childe for by this w● know we are translated fro● death to life because we own ●e brethren Many like forcible ●oofs he would shift off with is former evasions and after●ards became more wary a●ainst himself either loth to ●rant any thing or granting it ●aggeringly or what then ●●aring lest he should be pres●ed he wished that some were ●ut in minde 1. Of their great care ●or building and too small care for ●cholars in them 2. Their giving so long leave of absence from ●he Colledge and desired amendment After noon came a worthy Governour of a Colledge in our University Dr Aye● Provost of Queens Colledge and requested him ●o be of good comfort and to pluck up his spirit I cannot Why can you not Because I have ●o grace no more then a Backstock Why doe you think so By this affliction Doe you des● grace I cannot He spake m● strongly I can as well leap ov● the Church But are you 〈◊〉 sorry that you cannot desire it I cannot Would you not be Heaven I would not O● standing by said The De● himself would if he could B● the way you shall have the ●pinion of a much resp●cted Minister apposite heret● which he gave in private 〈◊〉 proud man saith he w●● scorne to seek any good fro● his enemy so the Devils pri●● will not let him think himse● beholding to God for Heaven if he might get it You hav● said one the testimony of faith you love the Brethren I di● not Doe not you love us No * This conclusiō was fastēed on him before which now he stufts off The Devil now seeth he shoul● be cast into straits if yo● ●ould grant this what is it that ●oth most trouble you I un●rtook too much upon me foolishly had gotten a little Logick and ●reek and meanly instructed in ●e rules did set my self to read to ●holars and afterwards under●ok other busines which distracted ●y minde and body from them I ●ave destroyed a thousand souls ●ou may see the falsehood of ●m that suggesteth this unto ●ou you never had a thousand ●e puts a false glasse before you ●he good effects of your pains ●ppears in many of your Scho●rs Oh they were of themselves ●apable Name one in whom ●hey doe not There is one point●ng at a Master of Arts there pre●nt He justified his care of ●im and gave thanks to God ●hat ever he came to him It is ●ot so I did foolishly You confesse you did foolishly therefo● not of malice Again cōsider wh● would have become of many them if you had not taken the● Better farre better All in the C●ledge know the contrary Bu● feel it It is false believe n● the Devil It is too true Wh● vvill you make amends G● will give you your hearts desir● Never Are you sorry that 〈◊〉 vvill not No there is no grace my heart it is dead Such w● Davids case What doe you co●pare me with him Behold Chri● himself Nothing to me Go● can make his death availabl● He cannot He is omnipoten● In me he cannot because 〈◊〉 stands with his purpose Who● God loveth once he loveth t● the end But he did never love m● You have tasted of his love 〈◊〉 deceived my self in a certain vain ●lory I exposed my head to many ●hings outwardly all You could ●ay the Lords Prayer and there● call him Father Hypocriti●ally I was wont to enquire of Ma●ter Mason what was meant by ●bba-father rather in curiosity ●hen truly to be edified God will ●ive a good issue Never I ●ave no sense We will pray ●ith you Doe not dishonour ●od It is well that you will ●ot have God dishonoured ●ere he sticked saying I pray ●ouble me not with distinctions ●fter came one who with ve●ement action of body pres●d and urged him to trust in ●od I cannot said he I can●●t he will not have me saved ●s sentence is passed Doe ●ou desire to be saved ●o Do you desire to desire ●o Would you be damned No. Look at the sinnes of ot●● men as great as yours and 〈◊〉 they are saved They were good a godly they found grace here is 〈◊〉 difference my sinnes are horribl● he repeated that towards 〈◊〉 Scholars All of us know y●● took pains Outwardly y●● did your best No. I see no● what it is you strictly look ba● to your own actions as a Ju●●ciary who will none of Go● mercy and now he hath jus● met with you your judgem●● is just These words affec● him strangely another wil● him to look to it it seemed n● Popery Doe you hope to 〈◊〉 justified by your merits I f●● to be damned for my sinnes T● other asked whether he cou●● say Amen No. Have y●● no tongue What is that to 〈◊〉 purpose Name Jesus I can● 〈◊〉 I had your tongue in my hand 〈◊〉 would make you speak Turn●●g his speech to a friend present ●●h saith he if you did but feel my ●●eif but an houre you would have ●●mpassion The other reply●d If you were in the fire you ●ould wish to get out I had ra●●er be in the fire then here I will ●ay for you Sinne not Let ●e fault be mine Although my purpose was ●rely to relate the passages of ●is gracious mans visitation and 〈◊〉 referre to