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ID Title Author Corrected Date of Publication (TCP Date of Publication) STC Words Pages
A36182 Canidia, or, The witches a rhapsody, in five parts / by R.D. Dixon, Robert, d. 1688. 1683 (1683) Wing D1745; ESTC R12020 238,407 608

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World's Wonders Caligula's Bridge three Miles long From Putzol to Biuly very strong Tables of Murine Onyx Stone Cups of Crystal Pearls all one Such was the Luxury of old Even to Stool-Pans of Gold Bibitur in Conchâ says Strabo Vitreo bibit Ille Priapo Coelatures Bosses Emblems of Apri Stantes extrà Pocula Capri. African Citron Trees for Tables Sustentatque tuos Aurea Mensa Dapes Patinarum Paludes They had their Wishes To swim up to the Ears in Dishes Gallus Cestius to Supper Invited By Tiberius was Delighted With Rarities overbaited By naked Maids that on them waited Ganymeds Exolete Carpet Knights Bearded overgrown Catamits To Ravish all in Dignitatibus An Office erected A Voluptatibus Apricius so Rich and Proud For 's Kitchin Nine Millions allow'd At last after all his Carving Poys'ned himself for fear of Starving Ingeniosa Gula Ransacks Air And Earth and Sea for Bills of Fare New farrowed Sows Paps Italian Mushrooms Fools Caps To cool their Wine Egyptian Snow Samian Cakes Baked slow Cocks-Treddles Guilt-heads Livers Fool Florentine that Quivers A whole Goat slic'd and stew'd in shivers Fesula's Peacocks Brains blended Phoenicopter's Tongues the World 's well amended At this rate it may soon be Ended The Worms will be well Befriended Six Thousand Lampreys Caesar bought For Triumphs better Fed than Taught Oysters the biggest of the Lake Lucrine The best Rellish were Rutupine The true Shoar they can Primo Deprendere Morsu Green Finn'd and as big as a Horse-shoe Lucullus had a deep swallow Call'd Tully and Pompey to sup in Apollo Minerva's Bucklet call'd Vitellius's Platter For Belly not Brains full of rich Matter Whole Patrimonies vast and stable Wholly consum'd at one Table Hyppocrates had a tedious Walk From Pole to Pole in a day to stalk They that nourish Jealousies and Fears Their Office is to carry Guts to the Bears Sparrows tread Eight times in an hour Pigeons draw Venus Chariot Bowre Phydias's Scambre Grass-hopper Bee of Brass Rarities with Archimede's Sphere of Glass A single Raisin-Stone Was the death of poor Anacreon Empedocles in Aetna's Smoak Like a-Fool himself did choak Euripides dy'd in Disgrace Eat up by the Curs of Thrace The Eagle gave Aeschylus a Spell Dropt on his bald Pate a Tortoise Shell Arcadian Nonasius Waters Could be contain'd in no other quarters But only in an Asses Hoof The coldest Creature that is by proof At the famous Battel of Tours Thousand Saracens fell in few hours Ebroven Major Domo in Clothair 's Raign Got first the Power Soveraign Charles Martell next of the same place Won the Crown from Chilperic's Race Hugh Capet descended from the Book By the Sword the Scepter took For the true Right you may go look Gauls were the ancient Colonels Druids brought Learning from their Cells I wonder who the Devil invented Spells If our Senses first deceive us Of all true Science they bereave us No certainty can be of Skill Nor no true Liberty of Will 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Experience In a Quack is a great Offence From whence all Mistakes commence Diverse Occurrences have diverse Respects And some come to miss by their Neglects 'T is hard to know which makes the true Effects Apollo pray'd to Cea●e A lasting Plague that was in Greece His Answer was very hollow To double the Altar of Apollo Fools are always plump and fair The Reason is they take no Care 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 we find True because Cupid is Blind Plutus is just so in his kind Fools go before and Wise behind Gold more than Wisdom most men mind At the unlacing of a Buck Ceremonies us'd for sake of Luck A Gentleman no Butcher on his Knees His Hat off lays the Beast on the Lees. A Cutter for the purpose that parts The Entrals by Mysterious Arts. All in deep silence as a Sacrificer Divides and Inspects and is never the wiser The Greek in empty Theatre sits Laughing The German in full Flagons quaffing Fools Ideots unconcern'd in all things Wise men take a care in small things Chymists bewitch'd spend all in Profundis Quia mutant Quadrata Rotundis Charles Martel a Gospel Propagator The first Tithe Impropriator Cain began the first Duel Goths and Vandals alike Cruel A Wise man only is secure Tho the most harm he endure The most unworthy to see Day Feel the Sun 's brightest Ray. He that looks round about all things well Is likest the most Truths to tell In Words to sport in Sentences to sleep Is with sober Learning to play Bo-peep Many Curious Arts Tonanti Sono But the true Wise man cryes Cui Bono Great Volumes run a great way 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 A great Cry and a little Wool Danaid's Tubs are never full A Spider's Web curiously wrought Proves at last good for nought There are more Things than Words I dare say And Words are doubtful every way Therefore a Wise man minds the Scope Lets himself down Precipes by a Rope And still distinguishes with Care That in all things he may come off fair Hair-brain'd Fools mind Sport and Drinking But ne're regard Study or Thinking Therefore they never understand Because they ne're had their Wits at command Let Truth be what it will Pleasure and Gains Are the only Objects of their Pains Flashes of Fancy they most mind Therefore their Reasons are never true nor kind And if they can of Oratory blow the Bellows Among Sots they count Selves and are counted brave Fellows Thus I a poor Witch can Faults sit and spye And if I complain they tell me I lye Alas I am a poor ignorant Female Soul And how dare I Learned Men controul Tho I have got little but Meat Drink and Clothing I have not been so long in the World for Nothing Women that have their Tongues at Command May order their Brains if they will understand Women may learn as well as Men To Read and Meditate and handle their Pen. But these Fops and Sots whom I so justly Rebuke Ne're gave their minds to handle a Book Drink Roar and Whore or plod upon Dirt Or in Pride and Bravery flirt Not minding Souls or Body's Health Uncapable to serve the Common wealth Devouring the Fruits of the Ground Doing of good can ne're be found I like not these unlucky Generations That follow nought but the World's Fashions The sooner these Varlets go off the Stage The sooner we hope for a Civiler Age. These things have mov'd me to so much Rage To see so few to Vertue engage And now I shall be call'd a Wolf or a Bear They 'l force me to shed many a Tear But they shall know I keep this Resolution To hold Truth and stand Persecution Mine is the Fate of Priests and Kings To do Good and suffer Evil things Base Rascals Rail and hurt what you can I 'le still take the part of an Honest man You make my Heart ake you make me Sweat I scorn you I scorn you be you never so Great I am an Old Witch is all your Note You 'l make me go in a Thred-bare Coat The Law is against Witches I confess But they may tax your Baseness nevertheless It may be left upon Record You ne're deserv'd a Witches good Word Still you bawl I 'm a Witch an be hang'd Still I cry you are Rogues an be Damn'd But I 'le give you the slip and Repent for the Nones And leave you to the Devil to pick all your Bones Money my Hearts if you have any Broken or Whole for a Parting Peny FINIS ERRATA SOme lay all Crimes upon Fate the King of Terrors But that won't suffice to Excuse my Errors For my Spirit 's Ingenious and I do Confess As I am a Gentleman I can do no less If I have let slip a few Words too Notorious Vse for them your Index Expurgatorius And when you find I have playd Vnlawful Frisks Spare not to Stab them with your Obelisks But in all I have Done or Said Pray Gentlemen use me kindly like a Maid Pardon my Faults Fair Reader then And Correct the Printers with your Pen.
Mausolaeum and the Tub Lye together of Equal Club. That Monument in Halycarnassus Is of less Fame than the Hill Parnassus CANTO XVI The last and most Bloody Act I come now to Transact That is to condemn the Fact A Treasons National Compact I 'le prove this Rebellious Draught To be more horrid than Witchcraft Odi Fanaticorum Opinionem Qui colunt Armatam Religionem 'T is beyond the mischief of Fates For Dunghil Slaves to contest with Potentates Tho I be a Mistress of all Revels Yet I never led the Dance to Rebels Oh Horrid for the King's Protection To take up Arms against Him was a Damn'd Projection His Power against his Person to use What call you this but a Monstrous Abuse You may remember very well There was never any Rebellion in Hell 'T is beyond any Infernal Spell Eastern Subjects their Kings Adore Europe is turn'd a Rebellious Whore For murdering Kings you Rebellious Slaves I 'le be the Sexton to dig all your Graves Oh you kill'd a King I remember The next Month after December Villains you are upon Everlasting Record No Princes for ever will take your Word Nor suffer you to take up the Sword Peace Truth and Plenty will never stay If you once with the Militia run away As you did that Fatal Day Traytors that brake all just Oaths or'e and o're Your'e all Rotten at the Core The Devil will never trust you more I 'le sooner trust the Devil or the Turk For they ne're did such Black Deeds work Radamanthus give 'um the Jerk Minos hang 'um up all by the Chin For basely Betraying and Selling their King Slash Aeacus lustily and all the Furies For the Ignoramus Juries For all the Loyal Blood they have spilt Run your Sword in their Guts up to the Hilt Especially because the Murderers Guilt Was cover'd with a Golden Quilt Ne're was such a Rebellious Crew Of such a Sanctified Hue To all Vows and Oaths never true I don 't like your Godly Painting Nor your Sacrilegious Sainting Kings Priests and Royal Branches Cut down by your Swords and Lances The worst of Murderers that ever spoke Were they that hew'd down the Royal Oak Ne're shew your Faces above Ground more Hell dares trust you no farther than the Door Now Rail at Witches who 'l believe you Had you more Kings to kill 't would never grieve you Your Rebellious Pates were surrounded With Crowns and Mitres by you confounded Yet you in Villanies were so Fool and Knave Hearty As to call your selves the Godly Party I could damn you my self with a very good Will For all the Innocent Blood you did spill Especially of Kings and Men the Best You hatcht those Eggs in Hell's Nest I conjure you to Answer at Pluto's Bar For Twenty years Unnatural War Which made Three Kingdoms stand a Jar. Loath'd by all People from far and near While you Revel'd and made good Cheer And put all the World in fear Since you have paid for 't dear A Curse is entail'd upon you all In Beelzebub's Judgment Hall The like was never since the Fall O sweet Princes never more Trust Those Rebels and Murd'rers that call themselves Just Vizard Hooded Saints It is my Task To throw off your deceitful Mask Hell never made the like Uproar As you did upon Heavens Score You our-did all the Fiends of Hell No Histories such Tragedies can parallel Eighty Eight and the Powder Treasons Of White Devils had not so many Legions Nor gave so many Sanctified Reasons Therefore the Devil his Suit Commences To such black Deeds for making such fair Pretences Who then can trust you Live or Dead That in such bloody Principles are Bred Day and Night I 'le haunt your Ghosts Hang ye up upon Tainters and Posts In Hell your Carkasses shall rost and fry Wish for Death but never dye The Devil tells you the Reason why Because you made him a glorious King For this Cheat the Worm shall ever sting O thou Politick Mazarine They say this was a Plot of Thine But I say 't was the Rebels own Contrivance Not without Mazarine's Connivance So two Mastive Dogs fight With hateful Heart and hurtful Will Intending each other to kill An Enemy to both stands by and sets them on Glad if both were destroy'd and gone Thus you gave too much occasion For a Common Foes Invasion Look to 't Brave and Loyal Men Never to be Trepand agen Twice in an Age for shame be Wise Hatch not the Egs of a Cockatrice I declare boldly against that black Deed I wish there were no more of your Cursed Breed Tho of Heaven I hope for no speed Yet this makes my Heart bleed So yet never did Yours For resisting the Higher Powers I understand far better Things No Subjects have Right to Judge Kings Leave 'um to a Higher Throne GOD is the Judge of Kings alone From henceforth Rebels I bid you be gone Your Companions I 'le be none We both in our Ways shall be Crost And both to Hell's Dungeon must be Tost I have protested against your Generation But you shall have the greatest Condemnation For my part I 'le keep my Station Leave all but my own Abomination And so I have finisht my Execration THE CLOSE ‘ AS I 'm a Witch as I 'm a Whore ‘ I can Versifie no more ‘ Now I 'm plung'd into this kind of Trash ‘ I 've lost my Wits and all my Cash ‘ Knock off then for 't is impossible to have ‘ A deadly stroke for every Knave ‘ I lash at nothing but Sins that are Swingers ‘ For the rest I scorn to foul my Fingers ‘ He that offers to rowze me a Stitch ‘ Shall feel the Vengeance of a Witch ‘ And I 'le make him dye in a Ditch ‘ I have thrown my Angry Pen away ‘ 'Till I see who dares Gainsay Dixi. Epilogue ‘ I ' Le quite throw off my Vizor now ‘ I 'le ride no more upon a Sow ‘ I 've borrowed a Witches Phrase and Style ‘ To damn Baseness all this while ‘ 'T is to me a grievous Toil. ‘ This hath been counted Brave ‘ Set a Knave to catch a Knave ‘ A Villain by a Villain slain ‘ Has least cause to complain ‘ Pardon the Figure of a Witch and a Whore ‘ I 'le prosecute this Allegory no more ‘ I have laid on many a flash ‘ By th' hand of as great a Witch as ever was ‘ If Rascals won't Reform hereafter ‘ Send 'um with a Vengeance to Tyburn's Slaughter ‘ I pity neither Son nor Daughter ‘ And let the Witches follow after ‘ At the Gallows there will be Room ‘ For all Base Fellows to receive their Doom ‘ I have long seen and suffered Evils ‘ Of all sorts from Men and Devils ‘ This hath occasion'd after All ‘ To make me dip my Pen in Gall. ‘ No man's Ruine I desire ‘ All mens Amendment I require ‘ All Worth and Honour I admire ‘ Vice hath kindled my holy Ire ‘