jocond confident and secure than the worst of sinners they can strut it under an unsupportable Mass of oaths blasphemies thefts murthers adulteries drunkenness and other the like sins yea can easily swallow these spiders with Mithridates and digest them too when one that is regenerate shrinkes under the burden of wandring thoughts and want of proficiency But why is it they are dead in sin Ephes 2.1 Revel 3.1 Now lay a mountain upon a dead-man he feels not once the weight To a Christian that hath the life of grace the least sin lyes heavy upon the conscience but to him that is dead let his sins be as heavy as a mountain of lead he seels in them no weight at all Again They are insensible of their sin and danger because ignorant for what the eye seeth not the heart rueth not Security makes worldlings merry and therefore are they secure because they are ignorant A dunce we know seldome makes doubts yea a fool saies Solomon boasteth and is confident Prov. 14.16 neither do blind men ever blush And the truth is were it not for pride and ignorance a world of men would be ashamed to have their faces seen abroad For take away from mens minds vain opinions flattering hopes false valuations imaginations and the like you will leave the minds of most men and women but poor shrunken things full of melancholy indisposition and unpleasing to themselves Ignorance is a veil or curtain to hide away their sins whereupon they are never troubled in conscience nor macerated with cares about eternity but think that all will be well The Devil and the flesh prophesie prosperity to sin yea life and salvation as the Pope promised the powder-traitors but death and damnation which Gods Spirit threatens will prove the crop they will reap For God it true the Devil and all flesh are lyers When we become regenerate and forsake sin then the Devil strongly and strangely assaults us as he did Christ when he was newly baptized and Pharaoh the children of Israel when they would forsake Aegypt and Herod the children when Christ was come to deliver his people Whence commonly it comes to passe that those think best of themselves that â—ave least cause yea the true Christian is as fearfull to entertain a good opinion of himself as the false is unwilling to be driven from it They that have store of grace mourn for the want of it and they that indeed Want it chant their abundance None so apt to doubt their adoption as they that may be assured of it nor none more usually fear then they that have the greatest cause to hope We feel corruption not by corruption but by grace and therefore the more we feel our inward corruptions the more grace we have Contraries the nearer they are to one another the sharper is the conflict betwixt them now of all enemies the spirit and flesh are nearest one to another being both in the soul of a regenerate man and in all faculties of the soul and in every action that springeth from those faculties The more grace the more spiritual life and the more spiritual life the more antipathy to the contrary whence none are so sensible of corruption as those that have the most living souls Sect. XXXVI Now for remedy of the contrary there cannot be a better lesson for carnal men to learn than this All the Promises of God are conditional to take place if we repent as all the threatenings of God are conditional to take place if we repent not But wicked men as they believe without repenting their faith being meer presumption so they repent without believing their repentance being indeed desperation and this observe we are cast down in the disappointing of our hopes in the same measure as we were too much lifted up in expectation of good from them Whence these perremptory presumers if ever they repent it is commonly as Francis Spira an Advocate of Padua did and never did any man plead so well for himself as he did against himself One star is much bigger than the Earth yet seems many degrees lesse It is the nature of fear to make dangers greater helps lesse then they are Christ hath promised peace and rest unto their souls that labour and are â—eavy laden and to those that walk according to rule Matth. 11.29 Gal. â— 16 even place celestial in the state of grace and peace eternal in the â—â—ate of glory Such therefore as never were distressed in conscience or live loosly never had true peace Peace is the Daughter of Righteousness Rom. 5.1 Being justified by faith we have peace with God But he who makes a bridge of his own shadow will be sure to fall into the water Those Blocks that never in their life were moved with Gods threatnings never in any straight of conscience never groaned under the burden of Gods anger they have not so much as entered into the porch of this house or lift a foot over the threshold of this School of repentance Oh! that we could but so much fear the eternal paines as we do the temporary and be but so carefull to save our souls from torment as our bodies In the mean time the case of these men is so much the worse by how much there fear is the lesse It faring with the soul as with the body Those diseases which do take away all sense of pain are of all others most desperate As the dead Palsey the falling-sicknesse the sleepy lethargy c. And the Patient is most dangerously sick when he hath no feeling thereof In like manner whilst they suppose themselves to be free from judgment they are already smitten with the heaviest of Gods judgments a heart that cannot repent Rom. 2.5 In a lethargy it is needfull the Patient should be cast into a burning Fever because the senses are benummed and this will waken them and dry up the besotting humours So in our dead security before our conversion God is fain to let the Law Sin Conscience and Satan loose upon us and to kindle the very fire of Hell in our souls that so we might be roused out of our security but thousands of these blocks both live and depart with as great hopes as men go to a lottery even dreaming of Heaven untill they awake in Hell For they too often die without any remorse of conscience like blocks or as an Ox dyes in a ditch Yea thousands that live like Laban dye like Nabal which is but the same word inverted whilst others the dear Children of God dye in distresse of conscience For it is not every good mans hap to dye like Antoninus Pius whose death was after the fashion and semblance of a kindly and pleasant sleep However Saint Austin's rule will be sure to hold He cannot dye ill that hath lived well and for the most part He that lives conscionably dyes comfortably and departeth rich And so you see how it fares with the wickedest and worst of men Wherefore
The thoughts of the godly are godly of the wicked worldly and by these good and evil men are best and truliest differenced one from another Would we know our own hearts and whether they be changed by a new birth Examine we our thoughts words actions passions especially our thoughts will inform us for these cannot be subject to hypocrisie as words and deeds are Sect. XXXIX Then by way of caution know that a child may as soon create it self aâ— a man in the state of Nature regenerate himself We cannot act in the least unlesse God bestows upon us daily privative grace to defend us from evil and daily positive grace inabling us to do good And those that are of Christ teaching know both from the word and by experience that of theÌ„mselveâ— they are not only weak but even dead to what is good moving no morâ— than they are moved that their best works are faulty all their sins deadly all their natures corrupted originally You hath he quickned that were dead in trespasses and sins Ephes 2.1 Yea we are altogether so dead in sin that we cannot stir the least joynt no not so much as feel our own deadness nor desire life except God be pleased to raise and restore our souls from the death of sin and grave of long custom to the life of grace Apt we arâ— to all evil but reprobate and indisposed to all grace and goodness yea to all the meanes thereof My powers are all corrupt corrupt my will Marble to good but wax to what is ill Insomuch that we are not sufficient of our selves to think much lesse 〈◊〉 speak least of all to do that which is good 2 Cor. 3.5 Joh. 15.4 5. Iâ— we have power to choose or refuse the object to do these well we have 〈◊〉 power We have ability we have will enough to undo our selves scopâ—â— enough hell-ward but neither motion nor will to do good that must bâ— put into us by him that gives both power and will and power to will Finally Each sanctified heart feels this but no words are able sufficiently to expresse what impotent wretches we are when we are not sustained So that we have no merit but the mercy of God to save us nothing but the blood of Christ and his mediation to cleanse and redeem us nothing but his obedience to inrich us As for our good works we are altogether be holding to God for them not God to us nor we to our selves because they are only his works in us Whatsoever thou art thou owest to him that made thee whatever thoâ— hast thou owest to him that Redeemed thee Therefore if we do any thing amisse let us accuse our selves if any thing well let us give all the praise 〈◊〉 God And indeed this is the test of a true or false Religion that which teacheth us to exalt God most and most to depresse our selves is the true that which doth most prank up our selves and detract from God is thâ— false As Bonaventure well notes Sect. XL. Now to wind up with a word of exhortation if thou beest convinceâ— and resolvest upon a new course let thy resolution be peremptory anâ— constant and take heed you harden not again as Pharaoh the Philistinâ— the young man in the Gospel Pilate and Judas did resemble not the irâ—â— which is no longer soft than it is in the fire for that good saith Gregory will do us no good which is not made good by perseverance If wiâ—â— these premonitions the Spirit hath vouchsafed to stir up in thine heart anâ— good motions and holy purposes to obey God in letting thy sins go quench not grieve not the Spirit 1 Thes 5.19 Return not with the Dog to thy vomit lest thy latter end prove seven-fold worse than thy beginning Matth. 12.43 45. O it is a fearfull thing to receive the grace of God in vain and a desperate thing being warned of a rock willfully to cast our selves upon it Neither let Satan perswade you to defer your repentance no not an hour lest your resolution proves as a false conception which never comes to bearing Besides death may be suddain even the least of a thousand things can kill you and give you no leasure to be sick Thirdly If thou wilt be safe from evil works avoid the occasions have no fellowship with the workers of iniquity neither fear their scoffs for this be sure of if your person and waies please God the world will be displeased with both If God be your friend men will be your enemies if they exercise their malice it is where he shews mercy But take heed of losing Gods favour to keep theirs Beda tels of a great man that was admonished by his friends in his sicknesse to repent who answered He would not yet for that if he should recover his friends and companions would laugh at him but growing sicker and sicker they again prest him but then his answer was that it was now too late for I am judged and condemned already A man cannot be a Nathaniel in whose heart there it no guile but the world counts him a fool But Christ saies Verily except ye be converted and become at little children ye shall not enter into the Kingdom of Heaven Mat. 18.3 Again Satan and your deceitfull heart will suggest unto you that a Religious life is a dumpish and melancholy life but holy David will tell you that light it sown to the righteous and joy to the upright Psal 97.11 Isa 65.14 And experience tells that earthly and bodily joys are but the body or rather the dregs of that joy which Gods people feel and are ravished with As O the calm and quietnesse of a good conscience the assurance of the pardon of sin and joy of the Holy Ghost the honesty of a virtuous and holy life how sweet they are Yea even Plato an Heathen could say That if wisdom and virtue could but represent it self to the eyes it would set the heart on fire with the love of it And the like of a sinners sadnesse as hear what Seneca saies if there were no God to punish him no Devil to torment him no Hell to burn him no man to see him yet would he not sin for the uglinesse and filthinesss of sin and the guilt and sadnesse of his conscience But experience is the best informer wherefore take the counsell of holy David Psalm 34.8 O tast and see that the Lord is good blessed is the man that trusteth in him To which accordeth that of holy Bernard Good art thou O Lord to the soul that seeks thee what art thou then to the soul that finds thee As I may appeal to â—ny mans conscience that hath been softned with the unction of grace â—nd truly tasted of the powers of the world to come to him that hath the â—ove of God shed abroad in his heart by the Holy Ghost whether his whole â—ife be not a perpetual halellujah in comparison of his natural condition Whence
if you are truly sensible of your wretchednesse it is a good sign that you are in some forwardnesse to be recovered and really to become so good as formerly you but dream'd or imagined your self to be And indeed the very first step to grace is to feel the want of grace and the next way to receive mercy is to see your self miserable Therefore our constant and most diligent search should be to find out the naughtinesse of our own hearts and to get strength from God against our prevailing corruptions Sect. XXXVII Loose Libertine But is there any hope for one so wicked as I who have turned the grace of God into wantonesse applying Christs passion as a warrant for my licenciousnesse not as a remedy and taking his death at a licence to sin his cross as a Letters pattent to do mischief As if a man should head his drum of rebellion with his pardon For I have most spitefully and maliciously taken up arms against my Maker and fought against my Redeemer all my daies Convert Do but unfeignedly repent you of your sins and forsake your former evil waies and lay hold upon Christ by a true and lively faith my soul for yours God is very ready to forgive them be they never so many and innumerable for multitude never to hainous for quality and magnitude Yea I can shew yow your pardon from the great King of Heaven for all that is past the which you may read at large Isa 55.7 Ezek. 18.21 to 29. and 33.11 Joel 2.12 13 14. Yea read 1 Cor. 6.10 11 together with the story of Manasses Mary Magdelen the Thief and the Prodigal Son and you shall see presidents thereof Yea the very murtherers of the Son of God upon their serious and unfeigned repentance and stedfast believing in him received pardon and salvation And indeed despair is a sin which never knew Jesus True every sin deserves damnation but no sin shall condemn but the lying and continuing in it True Repentance is ever blest with forgiveness And know this that Gods mercy is greater than thy sin whatever it be you cannot be so infinite in sinning as he is infinite in pardoning if you repent yea sins upon repentance are so remitted as if they had never been committed I will put away thy transgressions as a cloud and thy sins as a mist Isa 44.22 And what by corruption hath been done by repentance is undone As the former examples witnesse Come and let us reason together saith the Lord though your sins be as scarlet they shall be as white as snow Isa 1.18 Yea whiter than snow For the Prophet David laying open his blood-guiltinesse and his original impurity useth these words Purge me with bysop and I shall be clean wash me and I shall be whiter than snow Psal 51.7 And in reason did Christ come to call sinners to repentance and shall he not shew mercy to the penitent Or who would not cast his burthen upon him that desires to give ease As I live saith the Lord I would not the death of a sinner Ezek. 18.32 and 33.11 Only apply not this salve before the ulcer be searched to the bottom Lay not hold upon mercy untill you be throughly humbled The only way to become good is first to believe that you are evil and by accusing our selves we prevent Satan By judging our selves we prevent God Are we as sick of sorrow as we are of sin then may we hopefully go to the Physician of our souls who came into the world only to cure the sick and to give light to them only who sit in darknesse and in the shadow of death God does not pour the oyl of grace but into a broken and contrite heart Wouldst thou get out of the miserable estate of nature into the blessed estate of grace and of Satans hondslave become the child of God and a member of Christ Wouldst thou truly know thine own heart and be very sensible how evil and wicked it is that so thou maist have a more humble conceit of thy self lay to heart these three particulars 1 The corruption of our nature by reason of Original Sin 2. Our manifold breach of Gods righteous Law by actual sin 3. The guilt and punishment due to us for them both This being done thou wilt see and find thy necessity of a Redeemer And it is thirst only that makes us relish our drink hunger our meat The full stomach of a Pharisee surcharged with the superfluities of his own merits will loath the honey-comb of Christs righteousnesse This was it which made the young Prodigal to relish even servants fare though before wanton when full fed at home No more relish feels the Pharisaical heart in Christs blood than in a chip But O how acceptable is the fountain of living waters to the chased hart panting and braying The blood of Christ to the weary and tyred soul to the thirsty conscience scorched with the sense of Gods wrath he that presents him with it now welcome is he even as a special choice man one of a thousand And the deeper the sense of misery is the sweeter the sense of mercy is Sect. XXXVIII Then if you would be satisfied for time to come whether your Repentance and conversion be true and sound these particulars will infallibly inform you If you shall persevere when this trouble for sin is over in doing that which now you purpose it is an infallible sign your repentance is sound otherwise not If thou dost call to mind the Vow which thou madst in Baptism and dost thy endeavour to perform that which then thou didst promise If thou dost square thy life according to the rule of Gods Word and not after the rudiments of the world If thou art willing to forsake all sin without reserving one for otherwise that one sin may prove the bane of all thy graces even as Gideon had seventy Sons and but one Bastard and yet that Bastard destroyed all the rest that were Legitimate Judg 9.5 Sin is like the Ivy in the wall cut off bough branch body stump yet some strings or other will sprout out again Till the root be pluck't up or the wall be pulled down and ruined it will never utterly die Regeneration or new birth is a creation of new qualities in the soul as being by nature only evil disposed Gods children are known by this mark they walk not after the flesh but after the spirit Rom. 8.1 If Christ have called you to his service your life will appear more spiritual and excellent than others As for your fails 't is a sign that sin hath not gained your consent but committed a rape upon your soul when you cry out to God If the ravished Virgin under the Law cried out she was pronounced guiltlesse A sheep may fall into the mire but a swine delights to wallow in the mire Great difference between a woman that is forced though she cries out and strives and an alluring Adulteresse Again