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A05338 Englandes bright honour shining through the darke disgrace of Spaines Catholicon. Seruing as a cleare lantherne, to giue light to the whole world, to guide them by; and let them see, the darke and crooked packing, of Spaine, and Spanish practises. Discoursed in most excellent and learned satires, or briefe and memorable notes, in forme of chronicle. Read, but understand; and then iudge.; Satire Menipée de la vertu du Catholicon d'Espagne. English. T. W. (Thomas Wilcox), 1549?-1608, attributed name.; Leroy, Pierre, Canon of Rouen.; T. W., fl. 1573-1595. 1602 (1602) STC 15490; ESTC S104018 162,351 210

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or leaue off till they had driuen her out of the realme and sent her into Italie to her kinsfolkes God pardon that good Ladie A deuout praier for a holie woman But for the apprehension and conceit that she had of these things I feare much that she was the cause of many euils that we saw in her time For vpon this matter she did so hate thē that she neuer ceased till she had destroyed them as she did the one of them in the battaile of Iarnac and the other at the massacre of S. Bartholomew where if all they of Montmorency had been found they had had no better market of it then the rest To which poynt Messieur your vncle did very nimbly put his hand and valiantly pushed or lifted at the wheele that so he might put fire in the head of that young King Charles without whose death wee neede not doubt but that he had had the like scorne that Monsieur the Mareschall of Montmorency gaue him and Monsieur your brother in this towne whē he made them do all in their breeches Doubtie Dukes and very cleanly because they bare weapons and armour forbidden them without his passeport and leaue But it seemeth that the sodaine death of these their Kings one after another did alwaies breake set out of square the goodly attempts of your house and saued or at the least prolonged the liues of your principall enemies Now let vs come to that which fell out afterwards for it is time to speak of you and of Monsieur your brother who began from that time forward to appeare in armes and to walke in the footsteps and tracts of your predecessors A fardle of frumps against Duke du Mayenne You haue alreadie caused your valours and valiances to appeare in the siege of Poictiers which you brauely defended contrarie to the aduise of the first husband of Madame la Lieutenant Monsieur of Montpezat your predecessor who counselled you to forsake all and to get you packing thence Afterwards you were at the battaile of Montcontour and after that at the iourney or exployt done vpon S. Bartholomews day where the companions on the other side were taken napping if not on sleepe and prouoked to say whence come you Cardinall of Lorraine And though Monsieur your vncle at that time was turning ouer his portuise in Italie yet the play was not performed without his intermedling and seeking to haue the King of Spaynes approbation of it the Popes absolution touching the marriage which seemed for a lure and a trappe also to the Huguenots Afterwards you continued your blowes at the siege of Rochel where mē did perceiue that he that is at this day the King of Nauarre and Monsieur your brother were but one heart one soule Men may maske but dissimulation wil break out and their great puritie and familiaritie ingendred ielousie and suspition in all the world But we must come to the matter When you sawe that King Charles was dead who otherwise did not loue you very much had sundrie times repeated the saying of the great King Francis For he had no cause so to do whereof he himselfe had made these foure verses now very rife and common in euery mans mouth King Francis was no whit beguiled When he foretold that the Guisian race Would spoyle his sonnes of all they had And leaue his subiects in worse case A steppe to the scepter as they thought When you saw him I say dead without children and the late King his brother married with your barren and vnfruitfull cousin you began Monsieur your brother and you I meane to attempt and assay many practises and plots which many people sayd were the cause of all our miseries I am not of that number which beleeue that Messieurs your father and vncle had from their time layd the foundation of the building that your brother you haue builded since though there bee that speake of the notes of Dauid and of Piles who haue better then Nostradamus prognosticated foretold all that which we haue seene since their death and though some assure vs that Monsieur your vncle Cardinall of Lorraine had framed a certaine forme of all the order that was to beheld therein But I cannot beleeue that he that had as much vnderstanding as a mā could haue could hope to make his nephewes kings of France seeing as yet three brethren children of the Kings house in the right line all of thē very puissant and in the floure of their age readie to be married and he could not diuine or gesse that they should dye without issue as they did afterwards Besides hee sawe a great number of the Princes of the royall bloud that kept not themselues warme with the robe of heretikes that should haue cut off all hope from his desires I knowe very well that in his time he was the author that the Archdeacon of Thoul writ this much that those of the house of Lorraine were descended from Charles the great by the males A pedigree published but to small purpose that is to say of Charles Duke of Lorraine to whom the kingdome appertained after the death of Lewes the fifth king of France and that Hugh Capet hauing taken him at Laon and brought him and his wife prisoner to Orleans he had a sonne or male child of whom he affirmed the Dukes of Lorraine are descended this was vnder hand cast amongst the people As all did well perceiue and you were neuer a whit grieued with it though that the common and true histories doe plainly enough shew and witnesse that there was an interruption breaking off of males in the race of Lorraine by two women and namely in the wife of Godfrey of Bouillon named Idain So the sayd Archdeacon made an honourable amends for it A worthie Archdeacon according to the arrest and sentence giuen against him and like a lewd fellowe and sloathfull or fainthearted man vnsayd that he had spoken But in fine there was small appearance that at that time my sayd Lord your vncle could aspire to the kingdome hauing so many hinderances and heads either to fight against Two worthie waies to work by or to cause to dye by the sword or by poyson It is very true that euen from his beginning he was very ambitious and desirous of greatnes and of the gouernment of the state more then any other of his age and I make no doubt of it but that he desired to possesse the Kings and to haue held them had hee been able in tutorship and vnder gouernment as in olde time the Maiors of the palace did that so he might dispose of all according to his pleasure and set vp or pull downe those whom hee had listed Wicked mens purposes and practises are vaine which is the thing whereto commonly the greatest aspire Notwithstanding being almost come thereunto while he was liuing he gathered together and
he that did weare the great hatte had a head like the Poet Aeschilus in so much as their common speech was that in the said Estates there was none but three scuruie or scalled persons and one that was pilled or balde and if the Inquisition of Spayne had been in good time brought in A holie house I sawe more than fiue hundred of them what say I fiue hundred yea fiue thousand which by their blasphemies deserued nothing lesse then the colling and imbracing of the president Brisson But the lot fell not vpon any of them but vpon a certaine poore miserable man an Asse leader who to hasten forward his miserable dullard altogether wearied and tyred with blowes and burthens spake with a very high and vnderstandible voyce these offensiue and blasphemous words Let vs go grosse Iohn to the Estates which wordes being taken at the pond head He meaneth the fauourits of Spayne as wee say and ere euer they were fully fallen by one or two of the number of the foure squared Cuba and brought to two Inquisitors or Promoters of the faith namely Machault and de Here this blasphemer was holilie and Catholikelie condemned to bee beaten and scourged naked with rods at his Asse tayle thorowe all the foure corners or quarters of Paris which was an infallible prognostication and a very famous and plaine prelude to testifie to all the people that were assembled for that solemne action that the proceedings of all the orders and States should be full of iustice and equitie A scabbed horse good enough for a scalde squire as the sayd iudgement it selfe which was the scantling of the great peece of the iustice of the Estates that were to come But whilest men were making preparations and scaffolds in the Louvre the ancient temple and dwelling place of the Kings of France while they were looking for the Deputies of all quarters Pomp enough for so paltrie a meeting who from moneth to moneth should come thether with small noyse and without pompe or shew of traine as men were wont to doe in old time before the pride and corruption of our fathers had brought in ryot vicious superfluitie The French word signifieth such as play legier de maine and vse sleights to deceiue mens sights and bringing drugs out of farre countreys would perswade mē the excellencie of them by receiuing them themselues there were in the Court of the sayd Louvre two craftie Iugglers or Apothecaries the one a Spanyard and the other a Lorrain which it would haue done a man meruailous much good to see them vaunt their drugges and to play their iuggling trickes all the liue long day before all thē that would go to see them and that without paying any thing The Spanish Iugler or Apothecarie was very pleasant and mounted vpon a little scaffold playing rex as we say or shewing his knacks and iugling tricks and keeping the bancke or seate much like to many of those that a man may see at Venice in the place of S. Marke Vpon his scaffold there was tyed or set vp a great skinne of parchment written in diuers languages and sealed with fiue or sixe seales of golde of lead and of waxe He meaneth the Cardinall of Plaisance power Legantine from the Pope with certaine titles in letters of gold hauing therein these wordes Letters touching the power of a certaine Spanyard and of the meruailous effects of his drugge called Higuiero of Hell or a Catholicon compounded The summe of all this whole writing was that this treacle maker the young sonne of a certaine Spanyard of Grenado banished into Africke for Mahometisme the Phisitian of Ceriffa who made himselfe King of Marroco A fit instrument for the Pope and the Spanyard by a certaine kind or sort of Higuiero his father being dead came into Spayne caused himselfe to bee baptized and put himselfe to serue at Tolledo in the Colledge of the Iesuites there who hauing learned that the simple Catholicon of Rome had no other effects but to build vp soules and to cause saluation and blessednes in the other world only being wearie of so long a terme or time tooke counsell and was adu●sed by the counsell of his fathers will or testament A word much vsed amongst Phisitians Apothe●aries and Distillers to sophisticate this Catholicon so well that by meanes of handling of it of remouing and stirring of it drawing it thorow a Limbecke or Stillatorie and bringing it into powder he made thereof within that Colledge That is a soueraigne and choyse thing such a soueraigne electuarie as surpassed all the Philosophers stones of what sort soeuer the proofes and triall whereof also were diducted and layd out by fiftie articles such as insue hereafter I. That which that poore vnhappie Emperour Charles the fift could not doe with all the vnited forces and all the cannons of Europe The principall of Dame Venus Knights his braue sonne Dom Philip by the meane of this drugge hath been able to performe it seruing himselfe therein but with a simple Lieutenant ouer twelue or fifteene thousand men at the most II. That if this Lieutenant haue of this Catholicō in his Ensignes Cornets And into what towne wi●l not an Asse laden with golde pear●e he wil enter without giuing blow into a kingdome that is enemie vnto him the people there will meete him and will goe before him with crosses banners Legats and Primats And though he destroy rauine Witnesse the West Indies and the Low Countreys vsurpe murther and sacke all yea though he carrie away rauish burne and make all a wildernesse yet the people of the countrie will say These are our people these are good Catholikes they doe this for peace sake and for our mother holie Church The name of his pl●ce or house at Madrill Let a King who is a sluggard and keepeth at home but assay and endeuour to affine or trie this drugge in his Escuriall write but one word to father Ignatius the ingrosser and close keeper of this Catholicon he will finde him out a man who his conscience kept safe or as wee say with a safe conscience will murther his enemie whom hee was not able by force of armes to vanquish in twentie yeares III. If this King purpose to assure his Estates and territories to his children after his death and to inuade another mans kingdome with small expenses let him write but one word thereof to Mendoza his Ambassador It is against the order of the Alphabet to set a lier before a Iesuite or to father Commolet and that beneath in his letter he write with Higuiero of hell I the King they will furnish him with some one religious Apostata or other who will goe vnder some godly shew as a Iudas to murther and that in colde bloud a great King of France He meaneth Henrie the 3. his brother in law in the middest of his Campe
to salute for the slēder accoūt that I make of thē I am a friend to my coūtry as becōmeth a good burgesse citizen of Paris I am iealous for the preseruation of my religion and am in all that I am able your seruāt the seruant of your house To be short euery one is wearie of warre in which we now very well perceiue there is no more question touching our religion but concerning our bondage and to whom amongst you the carcases of our bones shall remaine That is the point indeed Thinke not to finde in time to come so many men as you haue done that in liuelines of heart will cast themselues away and be troth or marry themselues to desperation for the rest of their life and of their posteritie also Wee very well perceiue that you your selues are in the snares of the King of Spaine and that ye can neuer come out of them but wretched and as it were forlorne You haue done like the horse A fable but yet good in the morall and meaning of it who to defende himselfe from the hart who he perceiued was more liuely and full of strength than he called for man to his succour But man put a bridle in his mouth sadled him and betrapped him afterwards he put on his spurs backed him brought him to the hunting of the hart and to euery other place where he thought good 〈…〉 comming on of his backe nor taking off his bridle and saddle and by this meanes made himselfe subiect to the hollie crap and to the sput to serue his turne in euery worke in euery charge yea and in the very cart it selfe as the King of Spaine hath done with you And doubt ye not of this but if by your meanes he were once made master of the kingdome This is no lye for he hath practised it vpon others as nigh to him as he but that he would very quickly be rid of you by poyson by flaūders or otherwise for this is the fashion that he vseth wherwith he commonly saith hee must needes recompence them that betray their prince and their countrie Let them serue for witnesses and examples that wickedly deliuered vnto him the kingdome of Portugall who comming vnto him to demaund the recompence which hee had promised them before he was in possession of it sent them vnto that councell of his which is called the councell of conscience where answer was giuen them that if they had brought Portugall into the hands of the King of Spaine as a thing appertaining vnto him they had done nothing but that which good and loyall subiectes should haue done and they should haue their recompence and hire for it in heauen But if they deliuered it vp beleeuing that it did not appertaine vnto him meaning so to take it from their master they deserued to be hāged as traytors And this is the wages that you must looke for A good reason for of like sins there should be the like punishment after that you shall haue deliuered vs vp vnto such people which we for our parts are not purposed to endure We knowe too well that the Spaniards and Castillians and Bourguignons are our auncient and deadly enemies which of two thinges demaund the one either to bring vs vnder Spaine hath a double practise and purpose in assaulting Fraunce and to make vs slaues if they can that so they may ioyne Spaine Fraunce and the low countries in one tenure and vnder one gouernement or else if they cannot as indeed the best aduised and most wise amongst them doe not hope for that yet they may at the least in weaken vs and bring vs so low that neuer or for a long season we should neuer bee able to relieue our selues nor withstand them to the face For the King of Spaine which is an old fo● knoweth wel the iniurie that he doth vs vsurping against all right and iustice the Kingdome of Naples the Duchy of Millan and the Countie of Roussillon which belong vnto vs he knoweth the natural disposition of the french nation that knoweth not how any long season to continue in peace without setting vpon their neighbours Whereof the Flemmings haue made a prouerbe which saith A wittie sentence that when the Frenchman sleepeth the diuell rocketh the cradle Besides he seeth his estates and countries deuided and almost all of them vsurped by violence against the good will and liking of the inhabitants who are ill affected to him w●rd He seeth himselfe to be olde and brittle and his eldest sonne smally valiant of euill health and the rest of his familie to be in two daughters one whereof he hath married with the most ambitious and yet needie prince of Europe The Duke of Sauoy and the other that maketh a partie and cannot faile but find a great one If after his death which cannot in the very course of nature be very farre off his estates and countries should bee deuided and that one of his sonnes in law should set vpon his owne sonne he knoweth that the Frenchmen would not sleepe and that they would wake againe their olde pretenses titles and claimes Doth hee not then herein play the part of a very prudent fore seeing prince to infeeble vs by our selues to bring vs to so low an estate that wee shall not bee able to hurt him no not after his death You see also how hee hath caried himselfe in the succours that hee hath sent vs All bewraieth the treachery of Spaine the greatest part in paper and in hope the waiting for whereof hath wrought vs more euil then the comming thereof hath done vs good His double duckets and his men came not but euen whē we had a long time drawn out breath and were not able to doe any more although hee might much more soone haue succoured relieued vs. He maketh vs not fatte to sell vs as the butchers doe their hogges but for feare we should die ouer soone and minding to reserue vs to a greater destruction hee prolongeth our languishing life Weigh these comparisons with a little water brued and tossed with crummes of browne bread which also hee giueth vs with a licked or cleane finger as iaylors nourish and feede condemned persons the better to reserue them to the execution of punishment What is become of so many millions of double duckets which he braggeth he hath spent for the safetie of our estate And why should not the people haue them seeing it is the price of themselues except you wil sell them for nothing We see none of them amongst the people the greatest parte thereof are in the hands of our aduersaries or amongst you Messieurs the princes gouernors captaines and preachers who keepe them very fast locked vp in your coffers there remaineth to the people nothing but redde or copper coyne for the stamping whereof we haue imployed al our kettles caldrons chafers weights chaynes and