temptation and beg heartily of Almighty God to help thee to the veiw and discovery of all thy open and hidden sins This way all true penitents took having been once convicted S. 8. and upon after-failings and miscarriages Lamen 3.40 Let us search and try our ways and turn again unto the Lord and that same convert David tells what way he took at the beginning of his reformation to wit I thought on my wayes Psal 119.59 60. and turned my feet unto thy testimonies And tells us further that so soon as ever he was convinced of the necessity of reformation and the danger of living longer in his sins I made hast and delayed not to keep thy commandements and this true penitent gives thee what he desired of God it was this Search me O Lord Psal 139.23 24. and know my heart try me and know my thoughts and see if there be any wicked way in me and lead me in the way everlasting He knew the danger of sin and in some good measure the deceitfulness of mans own heart and the secret hidings of sin within and because he would keep none of his sins nor favour any of them he would have them discovered to himself that he himself might not conceal them and this was an argument he meant to be sincere and resolved to be reformed to purpose and the same convert David gives in the 4th Psalm first a reproof to the wicked saying How long will ye love vanity Psal 4.2.4 how long will ye continue wicked and in the 4 th verse he gives a direction and counsell saying Stand in awe and sin not stop here go no further in sin sin is a dreadfull thing but commune with your own heart upon your bed i. e. discourse and reason the case with your self in private consider your heart and ways what hath been the course of your life what is now the frame of my heart Say to thy self what have I done what am I doing how long shall I go on in these sad courses when shall I determine and resolve on amendment why not now is it not yet time have I not yet long enough been an enemy to God a rebell against his Lawes a drudge to my lust a slave to Satan a companion of fools and mad folk and a wanderer in the broad way which at last will lead me to endless wo and destruction shall I any longer consume any the rest of my time in fulfilling the lusts of the flesh as I have done too too much already or shall I now 1 Pet. 4.2 3. even now cease my folly and cast off my sins oh 't is doubtless high time And secondly S. 9.2 you are perswaded to deal roundly and particularly with your self do not go about to lessen and excuse thy faults spare not thy sins for thy sins will not spare thee give them no quarter believe none of their promises for to be sure if thou let any of them live with thee they will kill and destroy thy soul if it be a beloved sin with which thou hast taken pleasure or by which thou hast gotten somewhat yet trust it not keep it not for every sin let it promise never so fairly is thy mortall enemy there is a venome and deadly poyson in it which will infect all thy other performances and eat out thy comforts and cause thee at last to lie down in sorrow and despair If it be thy beloved one S. 10. Judg. 16. to the end yet remember so was Delilah to Sampson who notwithstanding betrayed him to affronts bindings woundings and death and so will this to thee if it come with pretended kindness to salute or delight thee or to remain with thee in quietness yet remember so did Joab to Abner 2 Sam. 3.27 yet smote him there and then under the fifth rib so that he died And so was the pretended sacrifice of the harlot in the Proverbs Pro. 7.13 23. With much fair speech she caused him to yield with the flattering of her lips she forced him and he goeth straitway after her as an oxe to the slaughter or as a fool to the correction c. Till a dart strike through his liver and as a bird hasteth to the snare not knowing that it is for his life Even so will it do with thee if thou trust it as Joab did Amasa And Joab said to Amasa 2 Sam. 20.9 10. art thou in health my brother And Joab took Amasa by the beard with the that hand to kiss him But Amasa took no heed to the sword that was in Joabs hand so he smote him therewith and shed out his bowels to the ground and he died So will every sin that speaketh fair to thee if thou be led aside by it do with thee for it still hath with it an instrument of woundings and death and will not spare thee when thou comest within its reach and power whatever hopes thou hast to the contrary for how true is that of the Apostle Rom. 6th after this question is put to every sinner what fruit had ye then in these things whereof you are now ashamed doth he not challenge your answer and can you answer any other thing to it but what he concludes Rom. 6.21.22 the end of those things is death for the wages of sin every sin is death and will any event be found other then what St. James speakes of the progress of sin that every man that bringeth forth sin Jam. 1.14 15. being enticed by his own lust and finisheth it must die eternally for it as certainly as every one that is born of a woman must tast of natural death with this only difference that both righteous and wicked penitent and impenitent must die a like death in nature but the wicked unregerate onely shall die eternally that is be for ever separate from God and be forever miserable How much then doth it concern me to labour the death of my sin S. 11. that my sin may not bring this death upon me how should I and every soul cast out that morsell though never so sweet that will either choke or poyson us at the last why should I dally or be familiar with that or keep it under the roof of my tabernacle that will cut my throat and then set all my house on fire and put my soul into flames of everlasting burnings Oh how can I doe this and act the other sin which doth put me under the wrath of my Lords displeasure at present and if I continue in it will procure that finall displeasure which will never be removed and this is an hell of misery to be banished from the face and favour of God and to lie under his wrath for ever Shall I then or any body else that loves God and his own soul continue in that or this sin S. 12. which for ought I know if I continue one day longer in it may never be
the name and maintained in heart and practice with an opinion that they will be accounted of as lesser irregularities deviations humane frailties and infirmities for men are pleased to think they may live in sins of infirmities safely and laudably and therefore are willing to believe that all their omissions of good duties and commissions of evil works are but as so many infirmities and easily pardoned without either forsaking them or striving against them or repenting of them But say the best thou canst of thy infirmities S. 6. either natural or moral either thy inclination and propension of nature to evil or slipping into a fault through a sudden surprisal and violent temptation or ignorance and inconsiderateness or suppose they be onely the defects in our duty as wandring thoughts sometimes dulness drowsiness and weariness in our service of God or thy backwardness to every good work thy want of proportionable zeal for Gods glory and the Church Or grant it to be but weakness of judgment S. 7. erroneous opinions though but in lesser truths or thy knowing not nor searching after thy secret sins be it but a sudden eruption of passion into anger and shrewd words or desires after forbidden and unlawfull objects or immoderate desires after things lawfull in themselves yet all these and all other infirmities to speak the most favourably of them are the disease sickness and disorders of the soul and ought to be the matter of our sorrow and humiliation and must be confessed to God in the enumeration of our sins and pardon must be begged in Christs name for his sake for them and except thy soul be humbled for all thy secret sins and all thy infirmities if not in every instance yet in the whole summe and thy labour and watchfulness be for the suppressing of their rise and preventing their reign as much as possible yea even they so little as they seem to thee they will prove mortal at the last and thy plea of Infirmity will not serve thy turn except thy sins of infirmities be pardoned and they will not be pardoned any more then greater sins but upon thy repentance and that which far greater offences could not doe if repented of in time and forsaken in heart and practice that these sins of infirmities will doe if not repented of in time and amended to what degree is possible for thee even these will procure thy damnation at the last Now concerning all those sins which the vulgar sort of men who pretend to Christianity account either no sins at all S. 8. or very lightly of them as small and inconsidérable yet by a long custome and frequent repetition are become habituall and so very sinfull and so very destructive and besides men that think them so small and innocent seldome if ever charge them upon their souls as sins to be grieved at repented of and amended when they examine their lives and actions as to other sins which are noted with a blacker character by reason of which neglect those smaller sins are let alone unmortified and men goe to their graves with impenitency as to those sins which will sink a man as deep into the gulf of misery and drown the soul in destruction and perdition and if they be but foolish lusts yet they are thus hurtfull to the soul 1 Tim. 6.9 To instance in some things of this kind for thy fuller conviction § I. Evil motions of lust the taint and corruption in nature There are in every mans nature the seeds of all evil S. 9. Gen. 6.5 Mat. 15.19 20. Jam. 1.14 15. Col. 3.5 which are the beginnings of all actuall sins mans nature is tainted and corrupted naughty Concupiscences and lusts are born with us which are defiling and corrupting the whole man the heart of man is full of them and in their first motions they are sins even that proneness inclination to evil and aversness and indisposedness to good which is in thee which thou mayst and must take notice of as a matter of sorrow and complaint against thy self as it is thy unhappiness and misery so it is thy sin and thy death and such a disease it is that if not healed and pardoned in thee by regeneration will leave thee under wrath and the curse Gal. 3.22 Rom. 5.12 Psam 51.5 Rom. 7.5 This that I mean is that which is understood by the name of Originall sin that is the corruption of humane nature by the sin of our first parents propagated to the whole kind of Adams race and posterity which is every man and woman as they receive life and birth these motions of sins doe work in our members to bring forth fruit unto death Now though this be every mans case S. 10. scarce any man makes it his own particular grief men make light of it and are so far from watching over and resisting the first motions and lustings after evil things and mortifying these corruptions that they are most apt to plead it by way of excuse for their faults and actuall transgressions which are the issues and effects of this corruption and lust from within But if ever thou hopest to be savingly reformed S. 11. this old man which is corrupt according to the deceitfull lusts must be put off that is must not be served nor yeilded unto but resisted and prayed against and indeed for my part had I no other sin that might be laid to my charge yet I find this inbred wickedness this naturall proneness to evil so exceeding sinfull that I should account it a choice mercy to be quite rid of it and 't is for this I have cause to hang the head and mourn and 't is that the moving corruptions may be quite destroyed and mortified in me is the prayer and care of my poor soul for my joy cannot be full untill my enemies that is my sins both root and branch seed and fruit be plucked up and withered and untill Christ alone his grace and vertues be formed in my soul and triumph in my conversation O doe not make light of that which put thee under the wrath of God and power of Satan S. 12. that may not be slighted by thee which is in thee the cause and originall of all sins that set the whole man upon evil the cause of all disorder and confusion every where in thee and every where in the world in a word 't is exceeding sinfull all evils lie folded up in thy original concupiscence Take heed therefore and take a special view and measure of this thy sin S. 13. and because thy flesh will never be weary in it's sinfull motions then be thou never weary nor give over resisting these lusts in thy self weakening this body of sin and hinder the progress of it and if thou canst not get it quite discharged suffer it not what ere it cost thee to reign in thee or prevail over thee listen not to lusts solicitations entertain
then I shall have no grace to repent nor space nor acceptance nor pardon nor heaven I can then do nothing that can be acceptable neither will God accept any thing I do if I will not hear him to day he may refuse me to morrow although I call upon him but to be sure if I put off the Lords requests and admonitions refusing them now in my health strength life and do not yield obey repent and reform as I know it is my duty then at last God will refuse and reject me yea laugh at my calamity and empty the vials of his just wrath and indignation upon me Pro. 11.12 to the end and leave me in misery to all eternity S. 10. Such a consideration as this would make one dread the thought of continuance in sin or to deferre repentance one day longer and would bless God he was not cut off in the last act of sin or in a state impenitent yesterday or the last week and resolves to venter no more so presumptuously on the morrow while to day is put into his hand for an opportunity Let this be thy resolution O sinner that readest and be happy in it CHAP. VIII Containing the main swasion and motion for a finall resolution and speedy practicall repentance and reall reformation NOw having made known unto thee S. 1. and laid in thy view before thee as in a map that thou mayst be the better able to examine and try thy state and accordingly understand which of those sins and how many of them thou art guilty of either in thoughts words or actions or evil inclinations and you will find if you will not be partial in the inquiry and search most of them either in whole or in some circumstances and branches to be thine own as certainly as any bodies else and if you have charity to your own soul or any care or desire for pardon and heaven you will be free to acknowledg them confess them own shame for them and be as ready and willing to beg forgiveness of God for thy faults as you were to commit your sins and speedily to forsake them all and with full resolution of soul never to venter on any of them again or come neer the appearance of sin any more lest thou be caught in sins snare and be defiled with sins filth Now that thou mayst be brought to this happy result S. 2. and upon serious consideration to take up an invincible resolution to leave off the love and practice of every sin and never to have to doe with any sin for the future but to fight and strive against it to the death and expulsion of it from the borders of thy soul and withstand all temptations whatsoever from world flesh and Satan to thy dying day that would engage thee again in sinfull courses and when this is done thou wilt finish this first part of reformation in thy self which consists in forsaking all sin and resolving against it in the whole kind of it And though this be the harder and most difficult piece of thy duty S. 3. to rid thy self of the prevalencie of thy inbred corruptions and shift thy life of all thy ill companions and long acquaintance I mean thy endeared sins with whom thou hast taken such content and pleasure and 't is a hard matter to be perswaded out of an habit of such vices wherein men have been long exercised and in which fleshly-minded men have taken such delight and complacencie Yet the business is not impossible S. 4. nor dishonorable nor beyond the power and strength of a true resolved Christian but if thou call in with fervent prayers and cryes Christ and grace to thy help in time who is not wanting to such and thou diligently use all those spirituall instruments and weapons God hath appointed for this spiritual warfare carefully it will be so far from impossible that it will be most succesfull and you shall find a most happy conquest and a glorious deliverance from both the guilt and powerfull dominion of sin And to this work and resolution without any further delay or hesitancie S. 5. I am now perswading thee by the best arguments I can think of at present and if you can think on better and more and more convincing and prevalent then what I offer to thee so they do the work with thee that is to cause thee leave off with all possible dispatch and speed all thy evil practises and sinfull follies I am content for my design is to bring thee to a speedy reformation through grace if I can and if this be done upon thee thou thy self wilt be happy in it and I say I am fully satisfied if that be done so thou be reformed soundly whether by these or any other motives Now S. 6. that you may understand clearly what is that I am about to perswade you to know it is this and this onely with these ensuing arguments that you would be humbled for and speedily cast off all your transgressions great and small in heart and life in habit and act so as never more hereafter to return to any thy sins upon any account again resolve against them all never listen to any allurements to sin never comply with any temptation or motion to sin again never yield to any perswasion to continue in thy sin one day longer live not in any sin for any bodies pleasure nor for any worldly advantage nor for fear of any frown from man or temporary loss or for fear of any affliction or trouble may happen to thee if thou leave off to walk in the way of sinners but take up the invincible resolution and courage of a Christian that is called forth to an honorable employment and a rich reward and a certain conquest if thou stand to it and dost persevere to the end in the use and exercise of those means thy God hath appointed thee for thy help this way both to banish sin from thy heart and life and to keep thy self from being pollured again with sins impurity and from being imprisoned any more under its insolencies and cheating traps and crafty solicitations and devices And that this may be effectually performed in its measure and time S. 7. which are appointed thee for this work I do intreat thee and in the Name of God enjoyn as thou hopest to attain unto that happiness thou wishest thine own soul by reformation to follow these few directions First of all to search and try thy own heart and wayes that thou mayst come to the knowledg of thy self and consider which of those sins forementioned how many of them are with thee how long thou hast lived in them and if you can remember when first you began to be a sinner in this or that kind and how often you have acted any of them and what instance and with what complacencie and delight with whom and in what place and at what time with what
fiery indignation which shall devour the adversary c. 2. My continuance in my sin is contrary to the gracious design of the Gospel and ministry of it which is appointed of mercy to my soul and to this end published to thee Act. 26.20 that it might be the happy instrument of thy conversion and to work thee off from thy sin and to perswade thee to let thy sins go and to build thee up in a most holy faith and life Act. 20.21 to turn me from sin to God from darkness to light from the power of Satan to God And what are all those calls intreaties S. 40. invitations wooings complainings menaces promises in the Gospel-administrations and all the labours watchings prayings and preachings and studies and teares and admonitions and warnings and to what end are sermons and sabbaths and sacraments for me why doth God rebuke and correct and inflict punishments upon sinners what are all these from the gracious God to me but so many varieties of arguments and so many importunities and instruments for this very end that I might leave off and cease to doe evil and learn to doe well to what purpose is all this cost but to bring my soul my life and sin asunder what is it for but this to cause me to leave and forsake that which God hates perfectly and that will undoe me certainly if kept 't is to perswade me to yeild to do no more any such act as God hates O doe not the thing that I hate saith God by all these his dispensations and that is the upshot of all Now while I continue in any sin what do I any less then cross the design of God by these means S. 41. and so render my self inexcusable and oppose God in Christ and resist the Spirit of God in his word working and endeavouring by all means my conversion what am I less injurious to Gods grace and Christs love by my obstinacie and wilfullness then they of this sort which our Saviour speaks to in tears Luke 13.34 Luke 19.42 How often would I have gathered thee as a hen doth her chickens under her wings but ye would not O that thou hadst known even thou in this thy day and by these thy means the things that belong unto thy peace but now they are hid from thine eyes thou knewest not the time of mercies visitation but crossest the gracious design of thy invitation thou wilt not leave thy sin and now mercy is hid from thee and so my continuance in sin is a meer contradiction to my pardon and forgiveness you see O how should this consideration cut me to the bone S. 42. and pierce me to the heart when my continuing in sin is no less then the opposing the grace of God Its design is to bring me to repentance and forsaking sin that I might find mercy and favour from him who but a mad man or a fool would continue in his sin against such grace and so cross that design of God to bring thee poor wretch to happiness I consider that as my sin is against God S. 43. for 't is a pollution and so against his most holy nature which hath no defilement and 't is against his holy laws his good will purpose and gracious designs and makes the sinner and God at great dispute and controversie which is a state bad enough for a poor wicked wretch to be in yet I may further consider that my sin is against God and so bad enough though God notwithstanding my enmity and contrariety can well enough secure his own honour holiness and eternal happiness without impeachment or the least interruption or diminution yet 't is bad enough to me that I by my sin am become an enemy to God and God an enemy to me which is death and misery sure enough to the sinner I may further consider that as often as I sin I offer violence to my own soul my sin is against my own self it is the greatest wrong and injury I can do to my self and if I had any true love to my self that is to the eternal welfare of my best self my soul Pro. 8.36 I should forbear sinning He that sinneth against me that is against Christ wrongeth his own soul all they that hate me love death If I live in sin and will not repent of it and forbear it I work the greatest mischief I can against my self sinning is self-murthering I lay violent hands on my self if I would study to ruine my self for ever there is no way imaginable like this now mentioned of sinning and repeating the acts and continuing in any sinfull course to effect my utter destruction every sin is a deaths-wound although it kill me not our-right yet it leaves me for dead I am a condemned man I am dead in law and dead as to the acting any life of grace it may be I may have for a little while a name to live but indeed I am dead dead while I live in the world Such an one a sinner is as the Angel of the Church of Sardis reproveth Rev. 3.1 I know thy workes that thou hast a name that thou livest and art dead When I commit a sin S. 44. I consider I doe that which for ought I know I may neither have the grace nor the space to repent of I may forget it I may make light of it or I may excuse it or defend it or maintain it I may be hardened in it and adde more to it and draw others to countenance and practise my sin and so still infect another with my plague and become an exemplar and promoter of wickedness and teach others to sin too and propagate iniquity and bring subjects to the devill and enlarge his kingdome O what an innumerable many of mischiefs do I bring upon my self and others when I sin And after all this if I do seem to be sorry for my so doing at the end of a vicious life I can have none assurance that I shall be pardoned but on the contrary most certain it is if I continue in my sin untill death I must be damned for all my repentance for Judas sinned and repented and despaired and was damned for all his repentance his sin for which he was accused and for which he hanged himself was but a sin and my transgression is a sin too and if Judas or Cain or a Simon Magus or a Julian be damned for their sins what advantage will it be for me if my sin be not so deep a dye so grim a complexion so horrid a sound as treasons and murder a betraying my Master and killing my Brother if I be cast into hell for my omissions of Gods commands and doing such things though but in the least instance which God hath absolutely forbidden When I consider this methinks I should dread sin as an ugly fiend as a devill of hell and shun it as a pest and a