Custom he came to the Legacies as follows Item I give and bequeath to Sancha Pança whom in my Madness I made my Squire whatever Money he has or may have of mine in his Hands and whereas there are Reckonings and Accounts to be adjusted between us for what he has received and disburs'd my Will and Pleasure is That whatever may remain due to me which can be but small be enjoy'd by him as my free Gift without any Let or Molestation and much Good may it do him And as when I was mad he was thro' my Means made Governour of an Island I wou'd now in my right Senses give him the Government of a Kingdom were it in my Power in Consideration of his Integrity and Faithfulness And now my Friend said he turning to Sancho pardon me that I have brought upon thee as well as my self the Scandal of Madness by drawing thee into my own Errors and perswading thee there have been and there are still Knights-Errant in the World Woe is me my dear Master's Worship cry'd Sancho all in Tears don't die this Bout but e'en take my Counsel and live on a many Years 't is the maddest Trick a Man can ever play in his Life to let his Breath sneak out of his Body without any more ado and without so much as a Rap o'er the Pate or a Kick of the Guts to go out like the Snuff of a Farthing-Candle and die meerly of the Mulligrubs or the Sullens For Shame Sir don't give way to Sluggishness but get out of your doleful Dumps and rise Is this a Time to lie honing and groaning a Bed when we shou'd be abroad in the Fields in our Shepherd's Coats as we had resolv'd Ten to one but behind some Bush or under some Hedge we may find the Lady Madam Dulcinea stripp'd of her inchanted Rags and as fine as a Queen Mayhaps you take it to Heart that you were unhors'd and a little Crupper-scratch'd t'other Day but if that be all lay the Blame upon me and say 't was my Fault in not girting Rozinante tight enough You know too there 's nothing more common in your Errantry-Books than for the Knights to be every Foot justl'd out of the Saddle There 's nothing but Ups and Downs in this World and he that 's cast down to Day may be cock-a-hoop to Morrow Even so said Sampson honest Sancho has the right Notion of the Matter Soft and fair Gentlemen reply'd Don Quixote ne'er look for Birds of this Year in the Nests of the last I was mad but I am now in my Senses I was once Don Quixote de la Mancha but I am once more the good Alonso Quixano and I hope the Sincerity of my Words and my Repentance may restore me the same Esteem you have had for me before and so Mr. Scrivener pray go on Item I constitute and appoint Antonia Quixano my Niece here present sole Heiress of all my Estate both Real and Personal after all my just Debts and Legacies bequeath'd by these Presents shall have been pay'd satisfy'd and deducted out of the best of my Goods and Chattels and the first of that Kind to be discharged shall be the Salary due to my House-keeper together with twenty Ducats over and above her Wages which said Sum I leave and bequeath her to buy her Mourning Item I appoint Mr. Curate and Mr. Sampson Carrasco the Batchelor here present to be the Executors of this my last Will and Testament Item It is my Will that if my Niece Antonia Quixano be inclinable to marry it be with none but a Person who upon strict Inquiry shall be found never to have read a Book of Knight-Errantry in his Life and in case it appears that he has been conversant in such Books and that she persists in her Resolution to marry him she is then to forfeit all Right and Title to my Inheritance which in such Case my Executors are hereby impower'd to dispose to pious Uses as they shall think most convenient Item I entreat the said Executors that if at any time they happen to meet with the Author of a Book now extant entitl'd The Second Part of the Atchievements of Don Quixote de la Mancha they wou'd from me most heartily beg his Pardon for my being undesignedly the Occasion of his writing such a Parcel of Impertinences as is contain'd in that Book for it is the greatest Burden to my departing Soul that ever I was the Cause of his making such a Thing publick Having finish'd the Will he fell into a swooning Fit and extended his Body to the full Length in the Bed All the Company were troubl'd and alarm'd and ran to his Assistance However he came to himself at last but relaps'd into the like Fits almost every Hour for the Space of three Days that he liv'd after he had made his Will The whole Family was in Grief and Confusion and yet after all the Niece continu'd to eat the House-keeper drank and wash'd down Sorrow and Sancho Pança made much of himself For there is a strange Charm in the Thoughts of a good Legacy or the Hopes of an Estate which wondrously removes or at least alleviates the Sorrow that Men shouâ—d otherwise feel for the Death of Friends At last Don Quixote's Dying-Day did come after he had made all those Preparations for Death which good Christians ought to do and by many fresh and weighty Arguments shew'd his Abhorrence of Books of Knight-Errantry The Scrivener who was by protested he had never read in any Books of that kind of any Knight-Errant who ever dy'd in his Bed so quietly and like a good Christian as Don Quixote did In short amidst the Tears and Lamentations of his Friends he gave up the Ghost or to speak more plainly died which when the Curate perceiv'd he desir'd the Scrivener or Notary to give him a Certificate how Alonso Quixano commonly call'd The Good and sometimes known bp the Name of Don Quixote de la Mancha was departed out of this Life into another and died a natural Death This lest any other Author but Cid Hamet Benengeli shou'd take Occasion to raise him from the Dead and presume to write fabulous Histories of his pretended Adventures Thus dy'd that ingenious Gentleman Don Quixote de la Mancha whose Native Place Cid Hamet has not thought fit directly to mention that all the Towns and Villages in La Mancha should contend for the Honour of giving him Birth as the Seven Cities of Greece did for Homer We shall omit Sancho's Lamentations and those of the Niece and the House-keeper as also several Epitaphs that were made for his Tomb and will only give you this which the Batchelor Carrasco caus'd to be put over it Don Quixote's Epitaph THE Body of a Knight lies here So brave that to his latest Breath Immortal Glory was his Care And makes him triumph over Death His Looks spread Terrour every Hour He strove Oppression to controul Nor cou'd all Hell's United Pow'r Subdue or daunt his Mighty Soul Nor has his Death the World deceiv'd Less than his wondrous Life surpriz'd For if he like a Madman liv'd At least he like a Wise One dy'd Here the Sagsacious Cid Hamet addressing himself to his Pen O thou my slender Pen says he thou of whose Knib whether well or ill cut I dare not speak my Thoughts Suspended by this Wire remain upon this Rack where I deposite thee There may'st thou claim a Being many Ages unless presumptuous Scribblers take thee down to profane thee But e'er they lay their heavy Hands on thee bid 'em beware and as well as thou can'st in their own Stile tell 'em Avaunt ye Scoundrels all and some I 'm kept for no such thing Defile not me but hang your selves And so God save the King For me alone was the great Quixote born and I alone for him Deeds were his Task and to record 'em mine We two like Tallies for each other struck are nothing when apart In vain the spurlous Scribe of Tordesellas dar'd with his blunt and bungling Ostridge-Quill invade the Deeds of my most Valorous Knight The great Attempt derides his feeble Skill while he betrays a Sense benumm'd and frozen And thou Reader if ever thou can'st find him out in his Obscurity I beseech thee advise him likewise to let the wearied mouldring Bones of Don Quixote rest quiet in the Earth that covers ' em Let him not expose 'em in Old Castile against the Sanctions of Death impiously raking him out of the Grave where he really lies stretch'd out beyond a Possibility of taking a third Ramble thro' the World The two Sallies that he has made already which are the Subject of these two Volumes and have met with such universal Applause in this and other Kingdoms are sufficient to ridicule the pretended Adventures of other Knights-Errant Thus advising him for the best thou shalt discharge the Duty of a Christian and do good to him that wishes thee Evil. As for me I must esteem my self happy and gain my End in rendring those fabulous Nonsensical Stories of Knight-Errantry the Object of the Publick Aversion They are already going down and I do not doubt but they will drop and fall altogether in good Earnest never to rise again Adieu FINIS
pace that they might get thither in time and so they arriv'd just as the Bearers had set down the Bier upon the ground and four of 'em had began to open the ground with their Spades just at the foot of a Rock They all saluted each other courteously and condol'd their mutual loss and then Don Quixote with those who came with him went to view the Bier where they saw the Dead Body of a young man in Shepherds weeds all strew'd over with Flowers The Deceased seem'd to be about 30 years old and dead as he was 't was easily perceiv'd that both his Face and Shape were extraordinary handsome Wâ—â—hin the Bier were some few Books and several Papers some open and the rest folded up This doleful object so strangely fill'd all the Company with sadness that not only the Beholders but also the Grave-makers and all the Mourning Shepherds remain'd a long time silent till at last one of the Bearers addressing himself to one of the rest Look Ambrose cry'd he whether this be the place which Chrysostome meant since you must needs have his Will so punctually perform'd This is the very place answer'd the other There it was that my unhappy Friend many times told me the sad story of his cruel Fortune There it was that he first saw that mortal Enemy of Mankind There it was that he made the first Discovery of his Passion no less innocent than violent There it was that the relentless Marcella last deny'd shunn'd him and drove him to that extremity of Sorrow and Despair that hasten'd the sad Catastrophe of his Tragical and Miserable Life and There it was that in token of so many Misfortunes he desir'd to be committed to the Bowels of eternal Oblivion Then addressing himself to Don Quixote and the rest of the Travellers This Body Sirs said he which here you now behold was once enliven'd by a Soul which Heaven had enrich'd with the greatest part of its most wealthy Graces This is the Body of that Chrysostome who was unrivall'd in Wit matchless in Courteousness incomparable in Gracefulness a Phaenix in Friendship Generous and Magnificent without Ostentation Prudent and Grave without Pride Modest without Affectation Pleasing and Complaisant without Meanness In a word the first in every esteemable Qualification and second to none in Misfortune He lov'd well and was hated he ador'd and was disdain'd he begg'd Pity of Cruelty itself he strove to move obdurate Marble pursu'd the Wind made his moans to solitary Desarts was constant to Ingratitude and for the Recompence of his Fidelity became a prey to Death in the Flower of his Age thro the barbarity of a Sheperdess whom he strove to immortalize by his Verse as these Papers which are here deposited might testify had he not commanded me to sacrifice 'em to the Flames at the same time that his body was committed to the Earth Shou'd you do so cry'd Vivaldo you wou'd appear more cruel to 'em than their exasperated unhappy Parent Consider Sir 't is not consistent with Discretion nor even with Justice so nicely to perform the Request of the Dead when 't is repugnant with Reason Augustus Caesar himself wou'd have forfeited his Title to Wisdom had he permitted that to have been effected which the Divine Virgil had order'd by his Will Therefore Sir now that you resign your Friends Body to the Grave do not hurry thus the noble and only Remains of that dear unhappy man to a worse Fate the Death of Oblivion What tho he has doom'd 'em to perish in the height of his Resentment you ought not indiscreetly to be their Executioner But rather reprieve and redeem 'em from eternal silence that they may live and flying thro the World transmit to all ages the dismal story of your Friends Virtue and Marcella s Ingratitude as a warning to others that they may avoid such tempting Snares and enchanting Destructions Therefore in the name of all the company like me deeply affected with a sense of Chrysostome's extraordinary merit and his unhappy fate and desirous to prevent such deplorable disasters for the future I beg that you will permit me to save some of these Papers whatever you resolve to do with the rest And so without expecting an answer he stretch'd out his arm and took out those Papers which lay next to his hand Well Sir said Ambrose you have found a way to make me submit and you may keep those Papers but for the rest nothing shall make me alter my Resolution of burning ' em Vivaldo said no more but being impatient to see what those Papers were which he had rescu'd from the Flames he open'd one of 'em immediately and read the Title of it which was The Despairing Lover That said Ambrose was the first Piece my dear Friend ever wrote and therefore that you may all hear to what a sad condition his unhappy Passion had reduc'd him read it aloud I beseech you Sir while the Grave is making With all my heart reply'd Vivaldo And so the Company having the same Desire presently gather'd round about him and he read the following lines CHAP. VI. The unfortunate Shepherd's Verses and other unexpected matters The Despairing Lover RElentless Tyrant of my heart Attend and hear thy Slave impart The matchless Story of his Pain In vain I labour to conceal What my extorted groans reveal Who can be rack d and not complain But oh who duly can express Thy cruelty and my distress No humane Art no humane Tongue Then Fiends assist and Rage infuse A raving Fury be my Muse And Hell inspire the dismal Song Owls Ravens Terrors of the Night Wolves Monsters Fiends with dire affright Joyn your dread accents to my Moans Joyn howling Winds your sullen Noise Thou grumbling Thunder joyn thy Voice Mad Seas your Roar and Hell thy Groans Thou still I mourn in dreiry Caves To desart Rocks and silent Graves My loud complaints shall wander far Born by the Winds they shall survive By pitying Ecchoes kept alive And fill the World with my despair Love's deadly Cure is fierce Disdain Distracting Fear a dreadful Pain And Jealousy a Matchless Woe Absence is Death yet while it kills I live with all these mortal Ills Scorn'd jealous loath'd and absent too No Dawn of hope e're cheer'd my heart No pitying Ray e're sooth'd my smart All all the sweets of Life are gone Then come Despair and frantic Rage With instant Fate my Pains asswage And end a thousands Deaths by one But ev'n in Death let Love be crown'd My fair destruction guiltless found And I be thought with Justice scorn'd Thus let me fall unlov'd unblest With all my Load of Woes opprest And even too wretched to be mourn'd Oh! thou by whose destructive hate Im hurried to this doleful Fate When I 'm no more thy Pity spare I dread thy Tears Oh spare 'em then But oh I rave I was too vain My Death can never cost a Tear Tormented Souls on you I call Hear one
There was a large Scaffold erected on one side of the Meadow and adorn'd with Carpets and Boughs for the Marriage-Ceremony and the more convenient Prospect of the Shows and Entertainments The Procession was just arriv'd to this Place when they heard a piercing out-cry and a voice calling out Stay rash and hasty People stay upon which all turning about they saw a Person coming after them in a black Coat border'd with Crimson powder'd with Flames of Fire On his Head he wore a Garland of mournful Cypress and a large Truncheon in his Hand headed with an Iron Spike As soon as he drew near they knew him to be the gallant Basil and the whole Assembly began to fear some Mischief would ensue seeing him come thus unlook'd for and with such an Outcry and Behaviour He came up tir'd and panting before the Bride and Bridegoom then leaning on his Truncheon he fix'd his Eyes on Quiteria turning pale and trembling at the same time and with a fearful hollow Voice Too well you know cry'd he unkind Quiteria that by the Ties of Truth and Law of that Heaven which we all revere while I have Life you cannot be marry'd to another You may remember too that all the while I stay'd hoping that Time and Industry might better my Fortune and render me a Match more equal for you I never offer'd to transcend the Bounds of honourable Love by solliciting Favours to the Prejudice of your Virtue But you forgetting all the Ties between us are going now to break 'em and give my Right to another whose large Possessions tho' they can procure him all other Blessings I had never envy'd could they not have purchas'd you But no more the Fates have ordain'd it and I will further their Design by removing this unhappy Obstacle out of your Way Live rich Camacho live happy with the ungrateful Quiteria many Years and let the poor the miserable Basil die whose Poverty has clipp'd the Wings of his Felicity and laid him in the Grave Saying these last Words he drew out of his suppos'd Truncheon a short Tuck that was conceal'd in it and setting the Hilt of it to the Ground he fell upon the Point in such a Manner that it came out all bloody at his Back the poor Wretch weltring on the Ground in Blood His Friends strangely confounded by this sad Accident ran to help him and Don Quixote forsaking Rozinante made Haste to his Assistance and taking him up in his Arms found there was still Life in him They would fain have drawn the Sword out of his Body but the Curate urg'd it was not convenient till he had made his Confession and prepar'd himself for Death which would immediately attend the Effusion of Blood upon pulling the Tuck out of his Body While they were debating this Point Basil seem'd to come a little to himself and calling on the Bride Oh. Quiteria said he with a faint and doleful Voice now now in this last and departing Minute of my Life even in this dreadful Agony of Death would you but vouchsafe to give me your Hand and own your self my Wife I should think my self rewarded for the Torments I endure and pleas'd to think this desparate Deed made me yours tho' but for a Moment I would die contented The Curate hearing this very earnestly recommended to him the Care of his Soul's Health which at the present Juncture was more proper than any Gratification of his outward Man that his Time was but short and he ought to be very earnest with Heaven in imploring its Mercy and Forgiveness for all his Sins but especially for his last desperate Action To which Basil answer'd That he could think of no Happiness till Quiteria yielded to be his but if she would do it that Satisfaction would calm his Spirits and dispose him to confess himself heartily Don Quixote hearing this cry'd out aloud That Basil's Demand was just and reasonable and that Signior Camacho might as honourably receive her as the worthy Basil's Widow as if he had receiv'd her at her Father's Hands Say but the Word Madam continu'd he pronounce it once to save a Man from Despair and Damnation you will not be long bound to it since the nuptial Bed of this Bridegroom must be the Grave Camacho stood all this while strangely confounded till at last he was prevail'd on by the repeated Importunities of Basil's Friends to consent that Quiteria should humour the dying Man knowing her own Happiness would be deferr'd but some few Minutes longer Then they all bent their Entreaties to Quiteria some with Tears in theiâ— Eyes others with all the engaging Arguments their Pity could suggest She stood a long Time inexorable and did not return any Answer till 〈◊〉 last the Curate came to her and bid her resolâ—â— what she would do for Basil was just ready to 〈◊〉 up the Ghost But then the poor Virgin trembling and dismay'd without speaking a Word came to poor Basil who lay gasping for Breath with his Eyes fix'd in his Head as if he were just expiring she kneel'd down by him and with the most manifest Signs of Grief beckon'd to him for his Hand Then Basil opening his Eyes and fixing them in a languishing Posture on hers Oh Quiteria said he your Heart at last relents when your Pity comes too late Thy Arms are now extended to relieve me when those of Death draw me to their Embraces and they alas are much too strong for thine All I desire of thee O fatal Beauty 〈◊〉 this let not that fair Hand deceive me now as 〈◊〉 has done before but confess that what you do iâ— free and voluntary without Constraint or in Compliance to any one's Commands declare me openly thy true and lawful Husband Thou wilt noâ— sure dissemble with one in Death and deal falsâ—â— with his departing Soul that all his Life has beeâ— true to thee In the Midst of all this Discourse 〈◊〉 fainted away and all the By-standers thought hiâ— gone The poor Quiteria with a blushing Modesâ—â— a kind of Violence upon her self took him by 〈◊〉 Hand and with a great deal of Emotion 〈◊〉 Force said she could ever work upon my Will 〈◊〉 this Degree therefore I believe it purely my owâ— free Will and Inclination that I here publickly dâ—clare you my only lawful Husband Here 's 〈◊〉 Hand in Pledge and I expect yours as freely 〈◊〉 return if your Pains and this sudden Accideâ—â— have not yet bereft you of all Sense I give it you said Basil with all the Presence of Mind imaginable and here I own my self thy Husband And I thy Wife said she whether thy Life be â—ong or whether from my Arms they bear thee this Instant to the Grave Methinks quoth Sancho this young Man talks too much for a Man in his Condition pray advise him to leave off his Wooing and mind his Soul's Health I 'm afraid his Death is more in his Tongue than in his Teeth Now when Basil and Quiteria had
the Road while the rest of the Footmen had secured Sancho and Dapple and drove 'em silently before ' em Don Quixote attempted twice or thrice to ask the Cause of this Usage but he no sooner began to open but they were ready to run the Heads of their Spears down his Throat Poor Sancho far'd worse yet for as he offer'd to speak one of the Foot-Guards gave him a Jagg with a Goad and serv'd Dapple as bad though the poor Beast had no Thought of saying a Word As it grew Night they mended their Pace and then the Darkness encreas'd the Fears of the Captive Knight and Squire especially when every Minute their Ears were tormented with these or such like Words On on ye Troglodytes Silence ye Barbarian Slaves Vengeance ye Anthropophagi Grumble not ye Scythians Be blind ye Murdering Polyphemes ye devouring Lions Bless us thought Sancho what Names do they calls us here Trollopites Barber's Slaves and Andrew Hodgepodgy City-Cans and Bur-frames I don't like the Sound of ' em Here 's one Mischief on the Neck of another When a Man 's down down with him I wou'd compound for a good dry Beating and glad to ' scape so too Don Quixote was no less perplex'd not being able to imagine the Reason either of their hard Usage or scurrilous Language which hitherto promis'd but little Good At last after they had rode about an Hour in the Dark they came to the Gates of a Castle which Don Quixote presently knowing to be the Duke's where he had so lately been Heaven bless me cry'd he what do I see Was not this the Mansion of Civility and Humanity But thus the Vanquish'd are doom'd to see every Thing frown upon ' em With that the two Prisoners were led into the great Court of the Castle and found such strange Preparations made there as encreas'd at once their Fear and their Amazement as we shall find in the next Chapter CHAP. LXIX Of the most singular and strangest Advenventure that befel Don Quixote in the whole Course of this famous History ALL the Horse-men alighted and the Footmen snatching up Don Quixote and Sancho in their Arms hurry'd 'em into the Court-Yard that was illuminated with above a hundred Torches six'd in huge Candle-sticks and about all the Galleries round the Court were plac'd above five hundred Lights insomuch that all was Day in the Midst of the Darkness of the Night In the Middle of the Court there was a Tomb rais'd some two Yards from the Ground with a large Pall of black Velvet over it and round about it a hundred Tapers of Virgins-Wax stood burning in Silver-Candlesticks Upon the Tomb lay the Body of a young Damsel who though to all Appearance dead was yet so beautiful that Death it self seem'd lovely in her Face Her Head was crown'd with a Garland of fragrant Flowers and supported by a Pillow of Cloath of Gold and in her Hands that laid across her Breast was seen a Branch of that yellow Palm that us'd of old to adorn the Triumphs of Conquerors On one Side of the Court there was a Kind of a Theatre erected on which two Personages sate in Chairs who by the Crowns upon their Heads and Scepters in their Hands were or at least appear'd to be Kings By the Side of the Theatre at the Foot of the Steps by which the Kings ascended two other Chairs were plac'd and thither Don Quixote and Sancho were led and caus'd to sit down the Guards that conducted 'em continuing silent all the while and making their Prisoners understand by awful Signs that they must also be silent But there was no great Occasion for that Caution for their Surprize was so great that it had ty'd up their Tongues with Amazement At the same Time two other Persons of Note ascended the Stage with a numerous Retinue and seated themselves on two stately Chairs by the two Theatrical Kings These Don Quixote presently knew to be the Duke and Dutchess at whose Palace he had been so nobly entertain'd But what he discover'd as the greatest Wonder was that the Corps upon the Tomb was the Body of the fair Altisidora Assoon as the Duke and Dutchess had ascended Don Quixote and Sancho made 'em aâ— profound Obeysance which they return'd with a short declining of their Heads Upon this a certain Officer enter'd the Court and coming up to Sancho he clapp'd over him a black Buckram-Frock all figur'd over with Flames of Fire and taking off his Cap he put on his Head a Kind of Mitre such as is worn by those who undergo publick Penance by the Inquisition whispering him in the Ear at the same Time that if he did but offer to open his Lips they would put a Gag in his Mouth or murder him to rights Sancho view'd himself over from Head to Foot and was a little startl'd to see himself all over in Fire and Flames but yet since he did not feel himself burn he car'd not a Farthing He pull'd off his Mitre and found it pictur'd over with Devils but he put it on again and bethought himself that since neither the Flames burn'd him nor the Devils ran away with him 't was well enough Don Quixote also stedfastly survey'd him and in the Midst of all his Apprehensions could not forbear smiling to see what a strange Figure he made And now in the midst of that profound Silence while every Thing was mute and Expectation most atrentive a soft and charming Symphony of Flutes that seem'd to issue from the Hollow of the Tomb agreeably fill'd their Ears Then there appear'd at the Head of the Monument a young Man extremely handsome and dress'd in a Roman Habit who to the Musick of a Harp touch'd by himself sung the following Stanza's with an excellent Voice Altisidora's Dirge While slain the fair Altisidora lies A Victim to Don Quixote's cold Disdain Here all Things mourn all Pleasure with her dies And Weeds of Woe disguise the Graces Train I 'll Sing the Beauties of her Face and Mind Her hopeless Passion her unhappy Fate No Orpheus's self in Numbers more refin'd Her Charms her Love her Sufferings cou'd relate Nor shall the Fair alone in Life be sung Her boundless Praise is my immortal Choice In the cold Grave when Death benums my Tongue For thee bright Maid my Soul shall find a Voice When from this narrow Cell my Spirit 's free And wanders grieving with the Shades below Ev'n o'er Oblivion's Waves I 'll sing to thee And Hell it self shall sympathize in Woe Enough cry'd one of the two Kings no more Divine Musician it were an endless Task to enumerate the Perfections of Altisidora or give us the Story of her Fate Nor is she dead as the ignorant Vulgar surmises No in the Mouth of Fame she lives and once more shall revive as soon as Sancho has undergone the Penance that is decreed to restore her to the World Therefore O Rhadamanthus thou who sittest in joynt Commission with me in
said Lucinda to me my Wedding Clothes are on and the perfidious Ferdinand with my covetous Father and the rest stay for me in the Hall to perform the Marriage Rites but they shall sooner be Witnesses of my Death than of my Nuptials Be not troubled my Dear Cardenio but rather strive to be present at that Sacrifice I promise thee if Entreaties and Words cannot prevent it I have a Dagger that shall do me Justice and my Death at least shall give thee undeniable Assurances of my Love and Fidelity Do Madam cry'd I to her with Precipitation and so disorder'd that I did not know what I said let your Actions verify your Words Let us leave nothing unattempted that may serve our common Interests and I assure you if my Sword does not defend 'em well I will turn it upon my own Breast rather than outlive my Disappointment I cannot tell whether Lucinda heard me for she was call'd away in great haste the Bride-Groom impatiently expecting her My Spirit forsook me when she left me and my Sorrow and Confusion cannot be express'd Methought I saw the Sun set for ever and my Eyes and my Senses partaking of my Distraction I cou'd not so much as spy the Door to go into the House and seem'd rooted to the place where I stood But at last the Consideration of my Love having rous'd me out of this stupifying Astonishment I got into the House without being discover'd every thing being there in a hurry and going into the Hall I hid my self behind the Hangings where two pieces of Tapstry met and gave me liberty to see without being seen Who can describe the various Thoughts the Doubts the Fears the Anguish that perplex'd and toss'd my Soul while I stood waiting there Don Ferdinand enter'd the Hall not like a Bride-Groom but in his usual Habit with only a Cousin German of Lucinda's the rest were the People of the House Some time after came Lucinda her self with her Mother and two waiting Women I perceiv'd she was as richly drest as was consistent with her Quality and the solemnity of the Ceremony but the Distraction that possess'd my Soul lent me no time to note particularly the Apparel she had on I only mark'd the Colours that were Carnation and White and the splendor of the Jewels that enrich'd her Dress in many places but nothing equal'd the lustre of her Beauty that adorn'd her Person much more than all those Ornaments Oh Memory thou fatal Enemy of my Ease why dost thou now so faithfully represent to the Eyes of my Mind Lucinda's incomparable Charms Why dost thou not rather show me what she did then that mov'd by so provoking a Wrong I may indeavour to revenge it or at least to dye Forgive me these tedious Digressions Gentlemen Alas my Woes are none of those that can or ought to be related with Brevity for to me every Circumstance seems worthy to be enlarg d upon The Curate assur'd Cardenio that they attended every word with a mournful Pleasure that made 'em greedy of hearing the least Passage With that Cardenio went on All Parties being met said he the Priest enter'd and taking the young Couple by the Hands he ask'd Lucinda whether she were willing to take Don Ferdinand for her Wedded Husband With that I thrust out my Head from between the two pieces of Tapstry listening with anxious Heart to hear her answer upon which depended my Life and Happiness Dull heartless Wretch that I was Why did I not then shew my self why did I not call to her aloud Consider what thou dost Lucinda thou art mine and can'st not be another Man's Nor can'st thou speak now the fatal Yes without injuring Heaven thy self and me and murthering thy Cardenio And thou perfidious Ferdinand who dar'st to violate all Rights both human and divine to rob me of my Treasure Can'st thou hope to deprive me with impunity of the comfort of my Life Or think'st thou that any Consideration can stifle my Resentments when my Honour and my Love lye at stake Fool that I am now that 't is too late and danger is far distant I say what I shou'd have done and not what I did then After I 've suffer'd the Treasure of my Soul to be stolen I exclaim against the Thief whom I might have punish'd for the base Attempt had I had but so much Resolution to revenge as I have now to complain Then let me rather accuse my faint Heart that durst not do me right and let me dye here like a Wretch void both of Sense and Honour the outcast of Society and Nature The Priest stood waiting for Lucinda's Answer a good while before she gave it and all that time I expected she wou'd have pull'd out her Dagger or unloos'd her Tongue to plead her former Engagement to me But alas to my eternal Disappointment I heard her at last with a feeble Voice pronounce the fatal Yes and then Don Ferdinand saying the same and giving her the Ring the sacred Knot was ty'd which Death alone can dissolve Then did the faithless Bridegroom advance to embrace his Bride but she laying her Hand upon her Heart in that very Moment swoon'd away in her Mother 's Arms. Oh what Confusion seiz'd me what Pangs what Torments rack'd my Soul seeing the Falshood of Lucinda's Promises all my hopes shipwrack'd and the only thing that made me wish to live for ever ravish'd from me Confounded and despairing I look'd upon my self as abandon'd by Heaven to the Cruelty of my Destiny and the Violence of my Grief stifling my Sighs and denying a passage to my Tears I felt my self transfix'd with killing Anguish and burning with jealous Rage and Vengeance In the mean time the whole Company was troubled at Lucinda's swooning and as her Mother unclasp'd her Gown before to give her Air a folded Paper was found in her Bosom which Don Ferdinand immediately snatch'd then stepping a little aside he open'd it and read it by the light of one of the Tapers And as soon as he had done he as it were let himself fall upon a Chair and there he sat with his Hand upon the side of his Face with all the signs of Melancholy and Discontent as unmindful of his Bride as if he had been insensible of her Accident For my own part seeing all the House thus in an uproar I resolv'd to leave the hated Place without caring whether I were seen or not and in case I were perceiv'd to act such a desperate part in punishing the Traytor Ferdinand that the World shou'd at once be inform'd of his Perfidiousness and the Severity of my just Resentment But my Destiny that reserv'd me for more lasting Woes allow'd me then the use of that small remainder of my Senses which afterwards quite forsook me So that I left the House without revenging my self on my Enemies whom I cou'd have easily sacrific'd to my Rage in this unexpected Disorder and I chose to inflict upon my self for
and the Sea Ports which occasion'd the Blunder she had made by saying that she landed at Ossuna I perceiv'd it reply'd the Curare and therefore I put in what you heard which brought matters to rights again But is it not an amazing thing to see how ready this unfortunate Gentleman is to give credit to these fictitious Reports only because they have the Air of the extravagant Stories in Books of Knight-Errantry Cardenio said that he thought this so strange a Madness that he did not believe the Wit of Man cou'd devise any thing like it shou'd any one ever start the thought of such another The Gentleman reply'd the Curate has some Qualities in him ev'n as surprizing in a Madman as his unparallel'd Frenzy For take him but off from his Romantick Humour to discourse with him of any other Subject you will find him to handle it with a great deal of Reason and shew himself by his Conversation to have very clear and entertaining Conceptions Insomuch that if Knight-Errantry bears no relation to his Discourse there is no Man but will esteem him for his vivacity of Wit and strength of Judgment While they were thus discoursing Don Quixote prosecuting his Converse with his Squire Sancho said he let us lay aside all manner of Animosity and tell me as speedily as thou canst without any remains of thy last displeasure how when and where didst thou find my Lady Dulcinea What was she doing when thou first pay'st thy respects to her How didst thou express thy self to her What Answer was she pleas'd to make thee What Countenance did she put on at the perusal of my Letter Who transcrib'd it fairly for thee and every thing else which has any relation to this Affair without Addition Lies or Flattery On the other side take care thou losest not a Tittle of the whole matter by abbreviating it lest thou rob me of part of that delight which I propose to my self from it Sir answer'd Sancho if I must speak the truth and nothing but the truth no body copy'd out the Letter for me for I carry'd none at all That 's right cry'd Don Quixote for I found the Pocket-Book in which it was written two days after thy departure which occasion'd exceeding grief in me because I knew not what thou couldst do when thou found'st thy self without the Letter and I could not but be induc'd to believe that thou wouldst have return'd in order to take it with Thee I had certainly done so reply'd Sancho were it not for this Head of mine which kept it in Remembrance ever since your Worship read it to me and help'd me to say it over to a Parish-Clerk who writ it out for me word for word so purely that he swore tho' he had written out many a Letter of Excommunication in his time he never in all the days of his life had read or seen any thing so well spoken as it was And dost thou still retain the Memory of it my dear Sancho cry'd Don Quixote Not I quoth Sancho for as soon as I had giv'n it her and your turn was serv'd I was very willing to forget it But if I remember any thing 't is what was on the top and it was thus High and Subterrene I would say Soveraign Lady and at the bottom Yours untill Death The Knight of the Woful Figure and I put between these two things three hundred Souls and Lives and Pigsnyes CHAP. IV. The pleasant Dialogue between Don Quixote and his Squire continu'd with other Adventures ALL this is mighty well said Don Quixote proceed therefore You arriv'd and how was that Queen of Beauty then employ'd On my Conscience thou found'st her stringing of Orient Pearls or imbroideing some curious Device in Gold for me her Captive Knight was it not so my Sancho No faith answer'd the Squire I found her winnowing a parcel of Wheat very seriously in the back Yard Then said the Don you may rest assur'd that every Corn of that Wheat was a Grain of Pearl since she did it the honour of touching it with her Divine Hand Didst thou observe the quality of the Wheat was it not of the finest sort Very indifferent I thought said the Squire Well this it least you must allow it must make the finest whitest Bread if sifted by her white Hands but go on when you deliver'd my Letter did she kiss it Did she treasure it in her Bosom or what Ceremony did she use worthy such a Letter How did she behave her self Why truly Sir answer'd Sancho when I offer'd her the Letter she was very busy handling her Sieve and prithee honest Friend said she do so much as lay that Letter down upon the Sack there I can't read it till I have winnow'd out what 's in my hands O unparallel'd Discretion cry'd Don Quixote she knew that a Perusal requir'd leisure and therefore deferr'd it for her more pleasing and private Hours But on my Squire while she was thus employ'd what Conferences past what did she ask about her Knight and what did you reply Say all say all my dearest Sancho let not the smallest Circumstance scape thy Tongue speak all that Thought can frame or Pen describe Her Questions were easily answer'd Sir said Sancho for she ask'd me none at all I told her indeed in what a sad pickle I had left you for her sake naked to the Waste that you eat and slept like the Brute Beasts that you wou'd let a Rasor as soon touch your Throat as your Beard that you were still blubbering and crying or swearing and cursing your Fortune There you mistook reply'd Don Quixote I rather bless my Fortune and always shall while Life affords me Breath since I am thought to merit the esteem of so high a Lady as Dulcinea del Toboso There you hit it said Sancho she is a high Lady indeed Sir for she 's taller than I am by a Foot and a half Why how now Sancho said the Knight hast thou measur'd thy length with her Ay marry did I Sir said the Squire for you must know that she desir'd me to lend her a hand in lifting a Sack of Wheat on an Ass so we buckl'd about it and I came so close to her that I found she was taller than I by a full span at least Right answered Don Quixote but thou art also conscious that the uncommon Stature of her Person is adorn'd with innumerable Graces and Endowments of Soul but Sancho when you approach'd the charming She did not an Aromatick Smell strike thy Sense a Scent so Odoriferous pleasing and sweet as I want a Name for it sweet as you understand me as the richest Fragrancy diffus'd around a Perfumer's Magazine of Odours this at least you must grant me I did indeed feel a sort of Scent a little unsavory said Sancho somewhat vigorous or so for I suppose she had wrought hard and sweat somewhat plentifully 'T is false answer'd the Knight thy smelling has been debauch'd
usually does make a Man happy I live the most discontented life in the World I am not able to tell you when my Misery began which now inwardly torments me with so strange extravagant and singular a Desire that I never reflect on it but I wonder at my self and condemn and curb my Folly and would fain hide my Desires even from my self And yet I have receiv'd no more advantage from this private Confusion then if I had publish'd my Extravagance to all the World Since therefore 't is evident that it will at last break out dear Lothario I would have it go no farther than thy known Fidelity and Secresy for that and my own Industry which as my Friend thou wilt turn to my Assistance will quickly I hope free me from the Anguish it now gives me and restore me that Tranquility of which my own Folly has now depriv'd me Lothario stood in great suspense unable to guess at the Consequence of so strange and prolix an Introduction In vain he rack'd his Imagination for the Causes of his Friend's Affliction the Truth was the last thing he could think of but no longer to remain in doubt he told Anselmo that he did his Friendship a particular Injury in not coming directly to the Point in the discovery of his Thoughts to him since his Counsels might enable him to support and perhaps to lose or compass such importunate Desires 'T is very true reply'd Anselmo and with that Assurance I must inform you that the Desire that gives me so much Pain is to know whether Camilla be really as Virtuous as I think her Nor can this be made evident but by such a Trial that like Gold by the Fire the Standard and Degree of her Worth be discover'd For in my Opinion no Woman has more Virtue than she retains after the force of the most earnest Solicitations Casta est quam nemo rogavit And she only may be said to be Chaste who has withstood the Force of Tears Vows Promises Gifts and all the Importunities of a Lover that is not easily deny'd For where 's the Praise of a Woman's Virtue whom no Body has ever endeavour'd to corrupt Where is the Wonder if a Wife be Reserv'd when she has no Temptation nor Opportunity of being otherwise especially if she have a jealous Husband with whom the least Suspicion goes for a Reality and who therefore punishes the least Appearances with Death Now I can never so much esteem her who owes her Virtue merely to Fear or want of Opportunity of being False as I would one who Victoriously surmounts all the Assaults of a vigorous and watchful Lover and yet retains her Virtue intire and unshaken These and many others Reason which I could urge to strengthen my Opinion make me desire that my Camilla's Virtue may pass through the fiery Trial of vigorous Solicitations and Addresses and these offer'd by a Gallant who may have Merit enough to deserve her good Opinion and if as I am confident she will she be able to resist so agreeable a Temptation I shall think my self the most happy Man in the World and attain to the height and utmost aim of my Desires and shall say that a Virtuous Woman is fallen to my Lot of whom the Wise Man says Who can find her If she yields I shall at least have the Satisfaction of finding my Opinion of Women justify'd and not be impos'd on by a foolish Confidence that abuses most Men which Consideration will be sufficient to make me support the Grief I shall derive from so expensive an Experiment And assuring my self that nothing which you can say can disswade me from my Resolution I desire that you your self my dear Friend would be the Person to put my Design in Execution I will furnish you with Opportunities enough of making your Addresses in which I would have you omit nothing you may suppose likely to prevail and mollify a Woman of Quality without Passion and reserv'd and discreet by Nature The most prevailing Reason that makes me choose you for this Affair above all others is because if she should prove so frail as to be overcome by Address and Importunities the Victory will not cost me so dear since I am secur'd from your taking that Advantage of which another might make no Scruple And so my Honour will remain untouch'd and the intended Injury a Secret in the Virtue of thy Silence for I know my Friend so well that Death and the Grave will as soon divulge my Affairs Wherefore if you would give me Life indeed and deliver me from the most perplexing Torment of Doubt you will immediately begin this Amorous Assault with all that Vigour Assiduity and Courage I expect from that Confidence I put in your Friendship Lothario gave so great an Attention to Anselmo's Reasons that he gave him no other Interruption than what we mention'd But now finding his Discourse was at an end full of Amazement at the Extravagance of the Proposal he thus reply'd Could I my dear Anselmo perswade my self that what you have said were any more than a piece of Raillery I should not have been so long silent no I should have interrupted you at the beginning of your Speech Sure you know neither your self nor me Anselmo or you would never have employ'd me in such an Affair if you had not thought me as much alter'd from what I was as you seem to be for as the Poet has it usque ad aras A true Friend ought to desire nothing of his Friend that is offensive to Heaven But should a Man so far exert his Friendship as to deviate a little from the Severity of Religion in Complaisance to his Friend no trifling Motive can excuse the Transgression and only his Honour and Life can make any tolerable Apology Which therefore of these Anselmo is in danger to warrant my undertaking so detestable a thing as you desire Neither I dare engage On the contrary you would make me the Assaultter of both in which my own is included for to rob you of your Reputation is to take away your Life since an Infamous Life is worse than Death and by making me the guilty Instrument of this as you would have me you make me worse than a dead Man by the Murder of my Reputation Therefore I desire you would hear with Patience what I have to urge against your extravagant Desire and I shall afterwards hear your Reply without Interrpution Anselmo having promis'd his Attention Lothario proceeded in this manner In my Opinion you are not unlike the Moors who are incapable of being convinc'd of the Error of their Religion by Scripture speculative Reasons or those drawn immediately from the Articles of our Faith and will yield to nothing but Demonstrations as evident as those of the Mathematicks and which can as little be deny'd as when we say If from two equal Parts we take away two equal Parts the Parts that remain are also equal And when
Assault with the greatest Bravery resolving to defend themselves and offend their Enemy as long and as much as possible But Providence had order'd the Matter much better than they cou'd hope for while Sancho who had thrown himself on his Master's Body was lamenting his Loss and the suppos'd Death of so noble and generous a Lord in the most ridiculous Manner that e'er was heard the Curate of the Knight's Party was come up with the other who came in the Procession and was immediately known by him so that their Acquaintance put an End to the Fears which both Sides were in of an Engagement Don Quixote's Curate in few Words acquainted the other with the Knight's Circumstances whereupon he and the whole Squadron of Penitents went over to see whether the unfortunate Knight were living or dead and heard Sancho Pança with Tears in his Eyes bewailing over his Master O Flower of Knighthood cry'd he that with one single perlous Knock art come to an untimely End Thou Honour of thy Family and Glory of all La Mancha nay and of the whole varsal World beside which now it has lost thee will be over-run by Miscreants and Outlaws who will no longer be afraid to be mauld for their Misdeeds O bountiful above all the Alexanders in the World thou who hast rewarded me but for poor eight Months Service with the best Island that is wash'd by Salt Water Thou who wert humble to the Proud and haughty to the Humble Thou who durst undertake Perils and patiently endure Affronts Thou who wert in Love no Body knows why True Pattern of good Men and Scourge of the wicked sworn Foe to all Reprobates and to say all at once that Man can say thou Knight-Errant The woful Accents of the Squire 's Voice at last recall'd Don Quixote to himself when after a deep Sigh the first thing he thought of was his absent Dulcinea O charming Dulcinea cry'd he the Wretch that lingers banish'd from your sight indures far greater Miseries than this And then looking on his faithful Squire Good Sancho said he help me once more into the Inchanted Chariot for I am not in a condition to mount at present this Shoulder is all broke to pieces With all my heart my good Lord reply'd Sancho and pray let me advise you to go back to our Village with those Gentlemen who are your special Friends At home we may think of some other Journey that may be more to the purpose than this With reason hast thou spoken Sancho reply'd Don Quixote It will become our Wisdom to be unactive till the malevolent Aspects of the Planets which now reign be over This grave Resolution was highly commended by the Canon Curate and Barber who had been sufficiently diverted by Sancho Pança's ridiculous Lamentation Don Quixote was plac'd in the Waggon as before The Processioners recover'd their former Order and past on about their Business The Goatherd took his leave of the whole Company The Curate satisfy'd the Officers for their Attendance since they would stir no farther The Canon desir'd the Curate to send him an account of Don Quixote's Condition from that time forward having a mind to know whether his Phrenzy abated or increas'd and then took his leave to continue his Journy Thus the Curate the Barber Don Quixote and Sancho Pança were left together as also the good Rozinante that bore all these Passages as patiently as his Master The Waggoner then yoak'd his Oxen and having set Don Quixote on a Truss of Hay jogg'd on after his slow accustom'd pace that way the Curate had directed In six days time they reach'd the Knight's Village 'T was about noon when they enter'd the Town and as this happen'd to be on a Sunday all the People were in the Market-place thro the middle of which Don Quixote's Cart must of necessity pass Every body was curious to know what was in it and the People were strangely surpriz'd when they saw and knew their Townsman While they were gaping and wondering a little Boy ran to the Knight's House and gave intelligence to the House-keeper and Niece that their Master was return'd and very lean pale and frightful as a Ghost stretch'd out at length on a Bundle of Hay in a Waggon and drawn along by a Team of Oxen. 'T was a piteous Sight to see the wailing of those two poor Creatures the Blows too which they gave themselves with the Curses and Execrations they thunder'd out against all Books of Chivalry were almost as numerous as their Sighs and Tears But the heighth of their lamenting was when Don Quixote entr'd the Door Upon the noise of his Arrival Sancho Pança's Wife made haste thither to inquire after her good Man who she was inform'd went a Squiring with the Knight As soon as ever she set Eyes on him the question she ask'd him was this Is the Ass in health or no Sancho answer'd he was come back in better health than his Master Well said she Heaven be prais'd for the good News But hark you my Friend continu'd she what have you got by this new Squireship Have you brought me home e'er a Gown or Petticoat or Shooes for my little Boys In troth sweet Wife reply'd Sancho I have brought thee none of these things I am loaded with better things Ay said his Wife that 's well Prethee let me see some of them fine things for I vow I 've a hugeous mind to she 'em the sight of 'em will comfort my poor Heart which has been like to burst with Sorrow and Grief ever since you went away I 'll shew 'em thee when we come home return'd Sancho in the mean time rest satsfy'd for if Heaven see good that we shall once again come abroad in search of other Adventures within a little time after at my return thou shalt find me some Earl or the Governour of some Island ay of one of the very best in the whole World I wish with all my heart this may come to pass reply'd the good Wife for by my troth Husband we want it sorely But what do you mean by that same word Islands for believe me I don't understand it All in good time Wife said Sancho Honey is not made for an Asse's Mouth I 'll tell thee what 't is hereafter Thou wilt be amaz'd to hear all thy Servants and Vassals ne'er speak a word to thee without an 't please you Madam an 't like your Ladyship and your Honour What dost thou mean Sancho by Ladyship Islands and Vassals ask'd Joan Pança For so she was call'd tho her Husband and she were nothing a-kin only 't is a Custom in La Mancha that the Wives are there call'd by their Husbands Sirnames Prithee Joan said Sancho dont't trouble thy head to know these Matters all at once and in a heap as a body may say Yet by the way one thing I will assure thee That nothing in the varsal World is better for an honest Man than to be Squire to
recall departed Joy Though barr'd the Hopes of greater Gain Or now the future Hours employ That must succeed my pleasant Pain The Gloss or Paraphrase I. ALL Fortune's Blessings disappear She 's Fickle as the Wind And now I find her as severe As once I thought her kind How soon the fleeting Pleasure's past How long the ling'ring Sorrows last Unconstant Goddess thro' thy Hate Do not thy prostrate Slave Destroy I 'd ne'er complain but bless my Fate Could I recall departed Joy II. Of all thy Gifts I beg but this Glut all Mankind with more Transport 'em with redoubled Bliss But only mine restore With thought of Pleasure once possess'd I 'm now as curst as I was bless'd Oh wou'd the charming Hours return How pleas'd I 'd live how free from Pain I ne'er wou'd pine I ne'er wou'd mourn Tho' barr'd the Hopes of greater Gain III. But oh the Blessing I implore Not Fate it self can give Since Time elaps'd exists no more No Pow'r can bid it live Our Days soon vanish into nought And have no Being but in Thought Whate'er began must end at last In vain we twice wou'd Youth enjoy In vain would we recall the past Or now the future Hours employ IV. Deceiv'd by Hope and Rack'd by Fear No longer Life can please I 'll then no more its Torments bear Since Death so soon can ease This Hour I 'll die But let me Pause A rising Doubt my Courage awes Assist ye Powers that rule my Fate Alarm my Thoughts my Rage refrain Convince my Soul there 's yet a State That must succeed my present Pain As soon as Don Lorenzo had read over his Paraphrase Don Quixote rose from his Seat and taking him by the Hand By the highest Mansions in the Skies cry'd the Knight aloud Noble Youth you 're the best Poet in the World and deserve to be Crown'd with Laurel not at Cyprus or Gaeta as a certain Poet said whom Heaven forgive but at the University of Athens were it still in being and at those of Paris Bologna and Salamanca May those Judges that deny you the Honour of the first Prize be shot with Arrows by the God of Verse and may the Muses abhor to come within their Houses Pray Sir if I may beg that Favour let me hear you read one of your loftiest Productions for I desire to have a full Taste of your admirable Genius I need not tell you that Don Lorenzo was mightily pleas'd to hear himself prais'd by Don Quixote tho' he believ'd him to be Mad. So bewitching and welcome a thing is Adulation even from those we at other times despise Don Lorenzo verify'd this Truth by his ready Compliance with Don Quixote's Request and recited to him the following Sonnet on the Story of Pyramus and Thisbe Pyramus and Thisbe A Sonnet SEE how to bless the lovely loving Boy The Nymph for whom he burns with equal Fires Pierces the Wall that parts 'em from their Joy While hovering Love prompts gazes and admires The trembling Maid in Whispers and in Sighs Dares hardly breathe the Passion she betrays But Silence speaks and Love thro' ravish'd Eyes Their Thoughts their Flames their very Souls conveys Wild with Desire they Sally out at last But quickly find their Ruin in their Haste And rashly lose all Pleasure in Despair Oh strange Mischance But do not Fortune blame Love joyn'd 'em first then Death the Grave and Fame What loving Wretch a Nobler Fate would share Now Heaven be prais'd said Don Quixote when Don Lorenzo had made an end Among the infinite Number of insipid Men of Rhime I have at last found a Man of Rhime and Reason and in a Word an absolute Poet. Don Quixote stay'd four Days at Don Diego's House and during all that time met with a very generous Entertainment However he then desâ—r'd his leave to go and return'd him a Thousand Thanks for his kind Reception letting him know that the Duty of his Profession did not admit of his staying any longer out of Action and therefore he design'd to go in quest of Adventures which he knew were plentifully to be â—ound in that part of Spain and that he wou'd employ his Time in that till the Tilts and Tournaments began at Saragossa to which Place 't was now his chief Intent to go However he wou'd first go to Montesino's Cave about which so many wonderful Stories were told in those Parts and there he wou'd endeavour to explore and discover the source and original Springs of the seven Lakes commonly call'd the Lakes of Ruydera Don Diego and his Son highly commended his noble Resolution and desir'd him to command whatever their House afforded assuring him he was sincerely Welcome to do it the Respect they had for his Honourable Profession and his particular Merit obliging them to do him all manner of Service In short the Day of his departure came a Day of Joy and Gladness to Don Quixote but of Grief and Sadness to poor Sancho who had no mind to change his Quarters and lik'd the good Cheer and Plenty at Don Diego's House much better than his short hungry Commons in Forests and Desarts the sorry Pittance of his ill-stor'd Wallet which â—e however Cramm'd and Stuff'd with what he â—hought cou'd best make the change of his Condition tolerable And now Don Quixote taking â—is leave of Don Lorenzo Sir said he I don't know whether I have already said it to you but if I have give me leave to repeat it once more that if you are Ambitious of climbing up to the difficult and in a manner inaccessible summit of the Temple of Fame your surest way is to leave on one hand the narrow Path of Poetry and follow the narrower Tack of Knight-Errantry which in a trice may raise you to an Imperial Throne With these Words Don Quixote seem'd to have Summ'd up the whole Evidence of his Madness However he cou'd not conclude without adding something more Heaven knows said he how willingly I would take Don Lorenzo with me to instruct him in those Vertues that are annex'd to the Employment I profess to spare the humble and crush the Proud and Haughty But since his tender Years do not yet qualifie him for the Hardships of that Life and his Laudable Exercises detain him I must rest Contented with letting you know That one way to acquire Fame in Poetry is to be govern'd by other Mens Judgment more than your own For 't is natural to Fathers and Mothers not to think their own Children ugly and this Error is no where so common as in the Off-spring of the Mind Don Diego and his Son were again surpriz'd to hear this Medley of good Sense and Extravagance and to find the poor Gentleman so strongly bent on the quest of his unlucky Adventures the only Aim and Object of his Desires After this and many Compliments and mutual Reiterations of Offers of Service Don Quixote having taken leave of the Lady of the Castle he on
no kind of Office of any Value that is not purchas'd with some sort of Bribe or Gratification of one kind or other all that I expect for advancing you to this Government is only that you wait on your Master in this Expedition that there may be an End of this memorable Adventure And I here engage my Honour that whether you return on Clavileno with all the speed his Swiftness promisâ—s or that it should be your ill Fortune to be oblig'd to Foot it back like a Pilgrim begging from Inn to Inn and Door to Door still whenever you come you will find your Island where you left it and your Islanders as glad to receive you for their Governour as ever And for my own Part Signior Sancho I 'll assure you you 'd very much wrong my Friendship shou'd you in the least doubt my Readiness to serve you Good your Worship say no more cry'd Sancho I am but a poor Squire and your Goodness is too great a Load for my Shoulders But hang Baseness Mount Master and blindfold me some-body wish me a good Voyage and pray for me But harkee good Folks when I am got up and fly in the Skies mayn't I say my Prayers and call on the Angels my self to help me trow Yes yes answer'd Trifaldi for Malumbruno though an Inchanter is nevertheless a Christian and does all things with a great deal of Sagacity having nothing to do with those he should not meddle with Come on then quoth Sancho let 's away and Heaven prosper us Thy Fear Sancho said Don Quixote might by a superstitious Mind be thought ominous Since the Adventure of the Fulling-Mills I have not seen thee possess'd with such a panick Terrour But hark ye begging this noble Company 's Leave I must have a Word with you in private Then withdrawing into a distant Part of the Garden among some Trees My dear Sancho said he thou feest we are going to take a long Journey thou art no less sensible of the Uncertainty of our Return and Heaven alone can tell what Leisure or Conveniency we may have in all that Time Let me therefore beg thee to slip aside to thy Chamber as if it were to get thy self ready for our Journey and there presently dispatch me only some 500 Lashes on the Account of the 3300 thou standest engag'd for 't will soon be done and a Business once begun you know is half ended Stark mad before George cry'd Sancho I wonder you are not asham'd Sir This is just as they say You see me in Haste and ask me for a Maidenhead I am just going to ride the wooden Horse and you would have me flea my Back-side Truly truly you 're plaguily out this Time Come come Sir let 's do one thing after another let us get off these Women's Whiskers and then I 'll feague it away for Dulcinea I have no more to say on the Matter at present Well honest Sancho reply'd Don Quixote I 'll take thy Word for once and I hope thou 'lt make it good for I believe thou art more Fool than Knave I am what I am quoth Sancho but whatever I be I 'll keep my Word ne'er fear it Upon this they return'd to the Company and just as they were going to mount Blind thy Eyes Sancho said Don Quixote and get up Sure he that sends so far for us can have no Design to deceive us since 't would never be to his Credit to delude those that rely on his Word of Honour and tho' the Success should not be answerable to our Desires still the Glory of so brave an Attempt will be ours and 't is not in the Power of Malice to eclipse it To Horse then Sir cry'd Sancho to Horse The Tears of those poor bearded Gentlewomen have melted my Heart and methinks I feel their Bristles sticking in it I shan't eat a Bit to do me Good till I see them have as pretty dimpled smooth Chins and soft Lips as they had before Mount then I say and blindfold your self first for if I must ride behind 't is a plain Case you must get up before me That 's right said Don Quixote and with that pulling a Handkerchief out of his Pocket he gave it to the disconsolate Matron to hoodwink him close She did so but presently after uncovering himself If I remember right said he Virgil tells us of the Trojan Palladium that wooden Horse which the Greeks offer'd Pallas full of arm'd Knights who afterwards prov'd the total Ruin of that famous City 'T were Prudence therefore before we get up to probe this Steed and see what he has in his Guts You need not said the Countess Trifaldi I dare engage there 's no Ground for any such Surmise for Malambruno is a Man of Honour and wou'd not so much as countenance any base or treacherous Practice and whatever Accident befalls ye I dare answer for Upon this Don Quixote mounted without any Reply imagining that what he might further urge concerning his Security would be a Reflection on his Valour He then began to try the Pin which was easily turn'd and as he sate with his long Legs stretch'd at Length for want of Stirrups he look'd like one of those antique Figures in a Roman Triumph woven in some old Piece of Arras Sancho very leisurely and unwillingly was made to climb up behind him and fixing himself as well as he cou'd on the Crupper felt it somewhat hard and uneasy With that looking on the Duke Good my Lord quoth he will you lend me something to clap under me some Pillow from the Page's Bed or the Dutchess's Cushion of State or any thing for this Horse's Crupper is so confounded hard I fancy 't is rather Marble than Wood. 'T is needless said the Countess for Clavileno will bear no kind of Furniture upon him so that for your greater Ease you had best sit side-ways like a Woman Sancho took her Advice and then after he had taken his Leave of the Company they bound a Cloth over his Eyes But presently after uncovering his Face with a pitiful Look on all the Spectators Good tender-hearted Christians cry'd he with Tears in his Eyes bestow a few Pater Nosters and Ave-Marys on a poor departing Brother and pray for my Soul as you expect the like Charirity your selves in such a Condition What! you Rascal said Don Quixote d' ye think your self at the Gallows and at the Point of Death that you hold forth in such a lamentable Strain Dastardly Wretch without a Soul dost thou not know that the fair Magalona once sate in thy Place and alighted from thence not into the Grave thou Chicken-hearted Varlet but into the Throne of France if there 's any Truth in History And do not I sit by thee that I may vie with the valorous Peter of Provence and press the Seat that was once press'd by him Come blindfold thy Eyes poor spiritless Animal and let me not know thee betray the least
bravest Knight the Earth had ever Possess'd As for Sancho he was looking up and down the Garden for the Disconsolate Matron to see what sort of a Face she had got now her Firz-bush was off But he was inform'd that as Clavileno came down Flaming in the Air the Countess with her Women Vanish'd immediately but not one of 'em Chinbristl'd nor so much as a Hair upon their Faces Then the Dutchess ask'd Sancho how he had far'd in his long Voyage Why truly Madam answer'd he I have seen Wonders for you must know that though my Master would not suffer me to pull the Cloath from my Eyes yet as I have a kind of an Itch to know every thing and a Spice of the Spirit of Contradiction still hankering after what 's forbidden me so when as my Master told me we were Flying through the Legion of Fire I shov'd my Handkerchief a little above my Nose and look'd down and what d' you think I saw I spy'd the Earth a hugeous way a far off below me Heaven bless us no bigger than a Mustard-seed and the Men walking to and fro upon 't not much larger than Hazle-Nuts Judge now if we were not got up wounded high Have a Care what you say my Friend said the Dutchess for if the Men were bigger than Hazle-Nuts and the Earth no bigger than a Mustard-seed one Man must be bigger than the whole Earth and cover it so that you cou'd not see it Like enough answer'd Sancho but for all that d' you see I saw it with a kind of a side-Look upon one Part of it or so Look you Sancho reply'd the Dutchess that won't bear for no Thing can be wholly seen by any Part of it Well well Madam quoth Sancho I don't understand your Parts and Wholes I saw it and there 's an end of the Story Only you must think that as we flew by Inchantment so we saw by Inchantment and thus I might see the Earth and all the Men which way soever I look'd I 'll warrant you won't believe me neither when I tell you that when I thrust up the Kerchief above my Brows I saw my self so near Heaven that between the top of my Cap. and the main Sky there was not a Span and a half And Heaven bless us forsooth what a hugeous great Place it is And we happen'd to Travel that Road where the * * The Pleiades vulgarly call'd in Spanish the Seven young She-Goats seven She-Goat-Stars were And Faith and Troth I had such a Mind to Play with 'em having been once a Goat-herd my self that I fancy I 'd have cry'd my self to Death had I not done it So soon as I spy'd 'em what does me I but sneaks down very soberly from behind my Master without telling any living Soul and play'd and leap'd about for three quarters of an Hour by the Clock with the pretty Nanny-Goats who are as sweet and fine as so many Marigolds or Gilly-Flowers And honest Wooden Peg stirr'd not one Step all the while And while Sancho employ'd himself with the Goats ask'd the Duke how was Don Quixote employ'd Truly answer'd the Knight I am sensible all things were alter'd from their Natural Course therefore what Sancho says seems the less strange to me But for my own part I neither saw Heaven nor Hell Sea nor Shore I perceiv'd indeed we pass'd through the middle Region of the Air and were pretty near that of Fire but that we came so near Heaven as Sancho says is altogether incredible because we then must have pass'd quite through the Fiery Region which lies between the Sphere of the Moon and the upper Region of the Air. Now it was impossible for us to reach that part where are the Pleiades or the Seven Goats as Sancho calls 'em without being Consum'd in the Elemental Fire and therefore since we escap'd those Flames certainly we did not soar so high and Sancho either Lies or Dreams I neither Lie nor Dream reply'd Sancho Uds Precious I can tell you the Marks and Colour of every Goat among 'em if you don't believe me Do but ask and try me You 'll easily see whether I speak Truth or no. Well said the Dutchess prithee tell us good Sancho Look you answer'd Sancho there were two of 'em Green two Carnation two Blue and one party-colour'd Truly said the Duke that 's a new kind of Goats you have found out Sancho we have none of those Colours upon Earth Sure Sir reply'd Sancho you 'll make some short difference between Heavenly She-Goats and the Goats of this World But Sancho said the Duke among those She-Goats did you see never a He Not one Horn'd Beast of the Masculine Gender Not one Sir I saw no other Horn'd thing but the Moon and I have been told that neither He-Goats nor any other Cornuted Tups are suffer'd to lift their Horns beyond those of the Moon They did not think fit to ask Sancho any more Questions about his Airy Voyage for in the Humour he was in they judg'd he would not stick to ramble all over the Heavens and tell 'em News of whatever was doing there though he had not stirr'd out of the Garden all the while Thus ended in short the Adventure of the Disconsolate Matron which afforded sufficient Sport to the Duke and Dutchess not only for the present but for the rest of their Lives and might have supply'd Sancho with matter of Talk from Generation to Generation for many Ages could he have liv'd so long Sancho said Don Quixote whispering him in the Ear since you 'll have us believe what you have seen in Heaven I desire you to believe me in what I said I saw in Montesino's Cave Not a Word more CHAP. XLII The Instructions which Don Quixote gave Sancho Pança before he went to the Government of his Island with other Matters of Moment THE Satisfaction which the Duke and Dutchess receiv'd by the happy Success of the Adventure of the Disconsolate Matron encourag'd 'em to carry on some other Pleasant Project since they could with so much Ease Impose on the Credulity of Don Quixote and his Squire Having therefore given Instructions to their Servants and Vassals how to behave themselves towards Sancho in his Government the Day after the Scene of the Wooden Horse the Duke bid Sancho prepare and be in a readiness to take Possession of his Government for now his Islanders wish'd as heartily for him as they did for Rain in a dry Summer Sancho made an humble Bow and looking demurely on the Duke Sir quoth he since I came down from Heaven whence I saw the Earth so very small I a'n't half so hot as I was for being a Governour For what Greatness can there be in being at the Head of a puny Dominion that 's but a little Nook of a tiny Mustard-seed And what Dignity and Power can a Man be reckon'd to have in governing half a dozen Men no bigger than Hazle-Nuts For I cou'd not
I 'd fain hear these four notable Proverbs that come so pat to the purpose I thank Heaven I have a pretty good Memory and yet I can't for my Soul call one to mind Why Sir quoth Sancho what Proverbs would you have better than these Between two Cheek-Teeth never clap thy Thumbs And when a Man says get out of my House what would you with my Wife There 's no answer to be made And again whether the Pitcher hit the Stone or the Stone the Pitcher it 's bad for the Pitcher All these fit to a hair Sir That is let no body meddle with his Governour or his Betters or he 'll rue for it as sure as a Gun as he must expect who runs his Finger between two Cheek-Teeth and tho' they were not Cheek-teeth if they be but Teeth that's enough In the next place let the Governor say what he will there 's no gainsaying him 't is as much as when one says get out of my House what would you with my Wife And as for the Stone and the Pitcher a Blind Man may see through it And so he that sees a Mote in another Man's Eye should do well to take the Beam out of his own that People mayn't say the Pot calls the Kettle black-arse and the dead Woman's afraid of her that 's flea'd Besides your Worship knows that a Fool knows more in his own House than a wise Body in another Man's That 's a Mistake Sancho reply'd Don Quixote for the Fool knows nothing neither in his own House nor in another Man's for no substantial Knowledge can be erected on so bad a Foundation as Folly But let 's break off this Discourse if thou do'st not discharge the part of a good Governor thine will be the Fault though the shame and discredit will be mine However this is my Comfort I 've done my Duty in giving thee the best and most wholsom Advice I could And so Heaven prosper and direct thee in thy Government and disappoint my Fears of thy turning all things upside down in that poor Island which I might indeed prevent by giving the Duke a more perfect Insight into thee and discovering to him that all that gorbelly'd paunch-gutted little Corps of thine is nothing but a Bundle of Proverbs and a Sack full of Knavery Look you Sir quoth Sancho if you think me not fit for this Government I 'll think no more on 't Alas the least Snip of my Soul's Nails as a Body may say is dearer to me than my whole Body And I hope I can live plain Sancho still upon a Luncheon of Bread and a Clove of Garlick as contented as Governour Sancho upon Capons and Partridges Death and Sleep make us all alike Rich and Poor High and Low Do but call to Mind who first put this Whim of Government into my Noddle you 'll find 't was your own self for as for me I know no more what belongs to Islands and Governours than a blind Buzzard So if you fancy the Devil will have me for being a Governour let me be plain Sancho still and go to Heaven rather than my Lord Governour and go to Hell These last Words of thine Sancho said Don Quixote in my Opinion prove thee worthy to govern a thousand Islands Thou hast naturally a good Disposition without which all Knowledge is insufficient Recommend thy self to the Divine Providence and be sure never to depart from Uprightness of Intention I mean have still a firm Purpose and Design to be thoroughly inform'd in all the Business that shall come before thee and act upon sure Grounds for Heaven always favours good Desires And so let 's go to Dinner for I believe now the Duke and Dutchess expect us CHAP. XLIV How Sancho Pança was carried to his Government and of the strange Adventure that befel Don Quixote in the Castle WE have it from the traditional Account of this History that there is a manifest Difference between the Translation and the Arabick in the Beginning of this Chapter Cid Hamet having in the Original taken an Occasion of criticizing on himself for undertaking so dry and limited a Subject which must confine him to the bare History of Don Quixote and Sancho and debar him the Liberty of launching into Episodes and Digressions that might be of more Weight and Entertainment To have his Fancy his Hand and Pen bound up to a single Design and his Sentiments confin'd to the Mouths of so few Persons he urg'd as an insupportable Toil and of small Credit to the Undertaker so that to avoid this Inconveniency he has introduc'd into the first Part some Novels as The Curious Impertinent and that of the Captive which were in a Manner distinct from the Design tho' the rest of the Stories which he brought in there fall naturally enough in with Don Quixote's Affairs and seem of Necessity to claim a Place in the Work It was his Opinion likewise as he has told us that the Adventures of Don Quixote requiring so great a Share of the Reader 's Attention his Novels must expect but an indifferent Reception or at most but a cursory View not sufficient to discover their artificial Contexture which must have been very obvious had they been publish'd by themselves without the Interludes of Don Quixote's Madness or Sancho's Impertinence He has therefore in this second Part avoided all distinct and independent Stories introducing only such as have the Appearance of Episodes yet flow naturally from the Design of the Story and these but seldom and with as much Brevity as they can be express'd Therefore since he has ty'd himself up to such narrow Bounds and confin'd his Understanding and Parts otherwise capable of the most copious Subjects to the pure Matter of this present Undertaking he begs it may add a Value to his Work and that he may be commended not so much for what he has writ as for what he has forborn to write And then he proceeds in his History as follows After Dinner Don Quixote gave Sancho in Writing the Copy of his verbal Instructions ordering him to get some Body to read 'em to him But the Squire had no sooner got 'em but he dropt the Paper which fell into the Duke's Hands who communicating the same to the Dutchess they found a fresh Occasion of admiring the Mixture of Don Quixote's good Sense and Extravagance And so carrying on the Humour they sent Sancho that Afternoon with a suitable Equipage to the Place he was to govern which where-ever it lay was to be an Island to him It happen'd that the Management of this Affair was committed to a Steward of the Duke's a Man of a facetious Humour and who had not only Wit to start a pleasant Design but Discretion to carry it on two Qualifications which make an agreeable Consort when they meet nothing being truly agreeable without good Sense He had already personated the Countess Trifaldi very successfully and with his Master's Instructions in
del Campo on the Right-hand and I took my Degree of Doctor in the University of Osuna Hath you said Sancho in a mighty Chafe Mr. Dr. Pedro Rezio de Aguero born at Tirteafuera that lies between Caraquel and Almodobar del Campo on the Right-hand and who took your Degree of Doctor at the University of Osuna and so forth Be gone Avoid the Room this Moment or by the Life of Pharaoh I 'll get me a good Cudgel and beginning with your Carcass will so be-labour and rib-roast all the Physick-mongers in the Island that I 'll not leave there one of the Tribe of those I mean that are Ignorant Quacks for as for Learned and Wise Physicians I 'll make much of 'em and honour 'em like so many Angels Once more Pedro Rezio I say get out of my Presence Avaunt Or I 'll take the Chair I sit upon and I 'll comb your Head with it to some Purpose and let me be call'd to an Account about it when I give up my Office I don't care I 'll clear my self by saying I did the World good Service in ridding it of a bad Physician the Plague of a Common-wealth Body of me let me eat or let 'em take their Government again for an Office that won't afford a Man his Victuals is not worth two Horse-Beans The Physician was terrify'd seeing the Governour in such a Heat and wou'd that Moment have slunk out of the Room had not the Sound of a Post-Horn in the Street been heard that Moment whereupon the Steward immediately looking out at the Window turn'd back and said there was an Express come from the Duke doubtless with some Dispatch of Importance Presently the Messenger enter'd sweating with Haste and Concern in his Looks and pulling a Packet out of his Bosom deliver'd it to the Governour Sancho gave it to the Steward and order'd him to read the Direction which was this To Don Sancho Pança Governour of the Island Barataria to be deliver'd into his own Hands or those of his Secretary Who is my Secretary cry'd Sancho 'T is I my Lord answer'd one that was by for I can write and read and am a Biscayner That last Qualification is enough to make thee set up for Secretary to the Emperor himself said Sancho Open the Letter then and see what it says The new Secretary did so and having perus'd the Dispatch by himself told the Governour that 't was a Business that was to be told only in Private Sancho order'd every one to leave the Room except the Steward and the Carver and then the Secretary read what follows I have receiv'd Information My Lord Don Sancho Pança that some of our Enemies intend to attack your Island with great Fury one of these Nights You ought therefore to be watchful and stand upon your Guard that you may not be sound unprovided I have also had Intelligence from faithful Spies that there are four Men got into the Town in Disguise to murder you your Abilities being regarded as a great Obstacle to the Enemy's Designs Look about you take heed how you admit Strangers to speak with you and eat nothing that is laid before you I will take care to send you Assistance if you stand in need of it And in every thing I rely on your Prudence From our Castle the 16th of August 〈◊〉 in the Morning Your Friend The Duke Sancho was astonish'd at the News and those that were with him seem'd no less concern'd But at last turning to the Steward I 'll tell you said he what is first to be done in this Case and that with all Speed Clap me that same Doctor Rezio in a Dungeon for if any Body has a Mind to kill me it must be he and that with a lingring Death the worst of Deaths Hunger-starving However said the Carver I am of Opinion your Honour ought not to eat any of the Things that stand here before ye for they were sent in by some of the Convents and 't is a common Saying The Devil â—urks behind the Cross Which no Body can deny quoth Sancho and therefore let me have for the present but a Luncheon of Bread and some four Pound of Raisins there can be no Poison in that For in short I cannot live without eating and if we must be in a Readiness against these Battles we had need be well victuall'd for 't is the Belly keeps up the Heart and not the Heart the Belly Mean while Secretary do you send my Lord Duke an Answer and tell him his Order shall be fulfill'd in every Part without fail Remember me kindly to my Lady Dutchess and beg of her not to forget to send one on purpose with my Letter and Bundle to Teresa Pança my Wife which I shall take as a special Favour and I will be mindful to serve her to the best of my Power And when your Hand 's in you may croud in my Service to my Master Don Quixote de la Mancha that he may see I am neither forgetful nor ungrateful The rest I leave to you put in what you will and do your Part like a good Secretary and a stanch Biscayner Now take away here and bring me something to eat and then you shall see I am able to deal with all the Spies Wizzards and cut-throat Dogs that dare to meddle with me and my Island At that Time a Page entring the Room My Lord said he there 's a Country-man without desires to speak with your Lordship about Business of great Consequence 'T is a strange Thing cry'd Sancho that one must still be plagu'd with these Men of Business Is it possible they shou'd be such Sots as not to understand this is not a Time for Business Do they fancy that we Governours and Distributors of Justice are made of Iron and Marble and have no need of Rest and Refreshment like other Creatures of Flesh and Blood Well before Heaven and o' my Conscience if my Government does but last as I shrewdly guess it will not I 'll get one of these Men of Business laid by the Heels Well for once let the Fellow come in But first take Heed he ben't one of the Spies or Ruffian-Rogues that would murder me As for that said the Page I dare say he had no Hand in the Plot poor Soul he looks as if he could not help it there 's no more Harm in him to see to than in a Piece of good Bread There 's no need to fear said the Steward since we are all here by you But hark you quoth Sancho now Dr. Razio's gone might not I eat something that has some Substance in it though it were but a Crust and an Onion At Night answer'd the Carver your Honour shall have no Cause to complain Supper shall make Amends for the Want of your Dinner Heaven grant it may said Sancho Now the Country-man came in and by his Looks seem'd to be a good harmless silly Soul As soon as he enter'd the Room
nor always merciful chuse a Mean between these two Extreams for in that middle Point is the Center of Discretion Visit the Prisons the Shambles and the publick Markets for the Governor's Presence is highly necessary in such Places Comfort the Prisoners that expect to be quickly dispatch'd Be a Terror to the Butchers that they may be fair in their Weights and keep Hucksters and fraudulent Dealers in Awe for the same Reason Should'st thou unhappily be inclin'd to be covetous given to Women or a Glutton as I hope thou art not avoid shewing thy self guilty of those Vices for when the Town and those that come near thee have discover'd thy Weakness they 'll be sure to try thee on that Side and tempt thee to thy everlasting Ruin Read over and over and seriously consider the Admonitions and Documents I gave thee in Writing before thou went'st to thy Government and thou wilt find the Benefit of it in all those Difficulties and Emergencies that so frequently attend the Function of a Governor Write to thy Lord and Lady and shew thy self grateful for Ingratitude is the Off-spring of Pride and one of the worst Corruptions of the Mind whereas he that is thankful to his Benefactors gives a Testimony that he will be so to God who has done and continually does him so much good My Lady Dutchess dispatch'd a Messenger on purpose to thy Wife Teresa with thy Hunting Suit and another Present We expect his Return every Moment I have been somewhat out of Order by a certain Cat Encounter I had lately not much to the Advantage of my Nose but all that 's nothing for if there are Negromancers that misuse me there are others ready to defend me Send me Word whether the Steward that is with thee had any Hand in the Business of the Countess of Trifaldi as thou wert once of Opinion and let me also have an Account of whatever befalls thee since the Distance between us is so small I have Thoughts of leaving this idle Life e'er long for I was not born for Luxury and Ease A Business has offer'd that I believe will make me lose the Duke and the Dutchess's Favour but though I am heartily sorry for 't that does not alter my Resolution for after all I owe more to my Profession than to Complaisance and as the Saying is Amicus Plato sed megis amica veritas I send thee this Scrap of Latin flattering my self that since thou cam'st to be a Governor thou may'st have learn'd that Language Farewel and Heaven keep thee above the Pity of the World Thy Friend Don Quixote de la Mancha Sancho gave great Attention to the Letter and it was highly applauded both for Sense and Integrity by every Body that heard it After that he rose from Table and calling the Secretary went without any further Delay and lock'd himself up with him in his Chamber to write an Answer to his Master Don Quixote He order'd the Scribe to set down Word for Word what he dictated without adding or diminishing the least Thing Which being strictly observ'd this was the Tenor of the Letter Sancho Pansa to Don Quixote de la Mancha I Am so taken up with Business that I han't Time to scratch my Head or pare my Nails which is the Reason they are so long God help me I tell you this dear Master of mine that you may not marvel why I han't yet let you know whether it goes well or ill with me in this same Government where I am more hunger-starv'd than when you and I wander'd through Woods and Wildernesses My Lord Duke wrote to me t'other Day to inform me of some Spies that were got into this Island to kill me But as yet I have discover'd none but a certain Doctor hir'd by the Islanders to kill all the Governours that come near it They call him Dr. Pedro Rezio de Aguero and he was born at Tirte a fuera his Name is enough to make me fear he 'll be the Death of me This same Doctor says of himself that he does not cure Diseases when you have 'em but when you have 'em not he only pretends to keep 'em from coming The Physick he uses is Fasting upon Fasting till he turns a Body to a meer Skeleton as if to be wasled to Skin and Bones were not as bad as a Fever In short he starves me to Death so that when I thought as being a Governor to have my Belly full of good hot Victuals and cool Liquor and to refresh my Body in Holland Sheets and on a soft Feather-bed I am come to do Penance like a Hermit and as I do it unwillingly I am afraid the Devil will have me at last All this While I have not yet so much as finger'd the least Penny of Money either for Feeâ— Bribes or any Thing and how it comes to be no better with me I can't for my Soul imagine for I have heard by the bye that the Governours who come to this Island are wont to have a very good Gift or at least a very round Sum lent 'em by the Town before they enter And they say too that this is the usual Custom not only here but in other Places Last Night going my Rounds I met with a mighty handsome Damsel in Boy 's Cloaths and a Brother of hers in Woman's Apparel My Gentleman-waiter fell in Love with the Girl and intends to make her his Wife as he says As for the Youth I have pitch'd upon him to be my Son-in-Law To Day we both design to discourse the Father one Diego de la Llana who 's a Gentleman and an old Christian every Inch of him I Visit the Markets as you advis'd me and Yesterday found one of the Hucksters selling Hazle-Nuts she pretended they were all New but I found she had mix'd a whole Bushel of old empty rotten Nuts among the same Quantity of new With that I adjudg'd them to be given to the Hospital-Boys who knew how to pick the good from the bad and gave Sentence against her that she should not come into the Market in fifteen Days and People said I did well What I can tell you is that if you 'll believe the Folks of this Town there 's not a more rascally Sort of People in the World than these Market-Women for they are all a saucy foul-mouth'd impudent hellish Rabble and I judge 'em to be so by those I have seen in other Places I am mighty well pleas'd that my Lady Dutchess has writ to my Wife Teresa Pansa and sent her the Token you mention It shall go hard but I will requite her Kindness one Time or other Pray give my Service to her and tell her from me she has not cast her Gift in a broken Sack as something more than Words shall shew If I might advise you and had my Wish there shou'd be no falling out between your Worship and my Lord and Lady for if you quarrel with 'em 't is I
is void of Consideration and disclaims the Rules of Reason in his Proceedings He is like Death and equally affects the lofty Palaces of Kings and the lowly Cottages of Shepherds Where-ever he takes entire Possession of a Soul the first Thing he does is to dismiss all Bashfulness and Shame So these being banish'd from Altisidora's Breast she confidently discover'd her loose Desires which alas rather fill'd me with Confusion than Pity Well go to quoth Sancho you are confoundedly cruel how could you be so hard-hearted and ungrateful had the poor Thing but made Love to me I dare say I should have come to at the first Word and have been at her Service Beshrew my Midriff what a Heart of Marble Bowels of Brass and Soul of Plaister you have But I can't for the Blood of me imagine what the poor Creature saw in your Worship to make her doat on you and play the Fool at this Rate Where the Devil was the sparkling Appearance the Briskness the fine Carriage the sweet Face that betwich'd her Indeed and indeed I often survey your Worship from the Tip of your Toe to the topmost hair on your Crown and not to flatter you I can see nothing in you but what 's more likely to scare one than to make one fall in Love I 've heard that Beauty is the first and chief Thing that begets Love now you not having any an 't like your Worship I can't guess what the poor Soul was smitten with Take notice Sancho answer'd Don Quixote that there are two Sorts of Beauty the one of the Soul and the other of the Body That of the Soul lies and displays it self in the Understanding in Principles of Honour and Vertue in a handsome Behaviour in Generosity and good Breeding all which Qualities may be found in a Person not so accomplish'd in outward Features And when this Beauty and not that of the Body is the Object of Love then the Assaults of that Passion are much more fierce more surprizing and effectual Now Sancho though I am sensible I am not handsome I know at the same time I 'm not deform'd and provided an honest Man be possess'd of the Endowments of the Mind which I have mention'd and nothing appears monstrous in him 't is enough to entitle him to the Love of a reasonable Creature Thus discoursing they got into a Wood quite out of the Road and on a sudden Don Quixote before he knew where he was found himself entangl'd in some Nets of green Thread that were spread across among the Trees Not being able to imagine what it was certainly Sancho cry'd he this Adventure of the Nets must be one of the most unaccountable that can be imagin'd Let me die now if this be not a Stratagem of the evil-minded Necromancers that haunt me to entangle me so that I may not proceed as it were to revenge my Contempt of Altisidora's Addresses But let 'em know that tho' these Nets were Adamantine Chains as they are only made of green Thread and though they were stronger than those in which the jealous God of Blacksmiths caught Venus and Mars I would break them with as much Ease as if they were weak Rushes or fine Cotton-Yarn With that the Knight put briskly forwards resolv'd to break through and make his Words good but in the very Moment there sprung from behind the Trees two most beautiful Shepherdesses at least they appear'd to be so by their Habits only with this Difference that they were richly dress'd in Gold Brocade Their flowing Hair hung down about their Shoulders in Curls as charming as the Sun 's Golden Rays and circl'd on their Brows with Garlands of green Bays and Red-flower-gentle interwoven As for their Age it seem'd not less than fifteen nor more than eighteen Years This unexpected Vision dazzl'd and amaz'd Sancho surpriz'd Don Quixote made even the gazing Sun stop short in his Career and held the surpriz'd Parties a while in the same Suspence and Silence 'till at last one of the Shepherdesses opening her Coral-Lips hold Sir she cry'd pray do not tear those Nets which we have spread here not to offend you but to divert our selves and because 't is likely you 'll enquire why they are spread here and who we are I shall tell you in few Words About two Leagues from this Place lies a Village where there are many People of Quality and good Estates among these several have made up a Company all of Friends Neighbours and Relations to come and take their Diversion in this Place which is one of the most delightful in these Parts To this purpose we design to set up a new Arcadia The young Men have put on the Habit of Shepherds and Ladies the Dress of Shepherdesses We have got two Eclogues by Heart one out of the famous Garcilasso and the other out of Camoen's that most excellent Portugueze Poet tho' the Truth is we have not yet repeated them for Yesterday was but the first Day of our coming hither We have pitch'd some Tents among the Trees near the Banks of a large Brook that waters all these Meadows And last Night we spread these Nets to catch such simple Birds as our Calls shou'd allure into the Snare Now Sir if you please to afford us your Company you shall be made very welcome and handsomely entertain'd for we are all dispos'd to pass the Time agreeably and for a while banish Melancholy from this Place Truly fair Lady answer'd Don Quixote Actaeon cou'd not be more lost in Admiration and Amazement at the Sight of Diana Bathing her self than I was at the Appearance of your Beauty I applaud the Design of your Entertainment and return you Thanks for your obliging Offers assuring you that if it lies in my Power to serve you you may depend on my Obedience to your Commands For my Profession is the very Reverse of Ingratitude and aims at doing Good to all Persons especially those of your Merit and Condition so that were these Nets spread over the Surface of the whole Earth I would seek out a Passage thro' new Worlds rather than I wou'd break the smallest Thread that conduces to your Pastime And that you may give some Credit to this seeming Exaggeration know that he who makes this Promise is no less than Don Quixote de la Mancha if ever such a Name has reach'd your Ears Oh my Dear cry'd the other Shepherdess what good Fortune this is You see this Gentleman before us I must tell you he is the most valiant the most amorous and the most complaisant Person in the World if the History of his Exploits already in Print does not deceive us I have read it my Dear and I hold a Wager that honest Fellow there by him is one Sancho Pança his Squire the most comical Creature that ever was You have nick'd it quoth Sancho I am that comical Creature and that very Squire you wot of and there 's my Lord and Master the self-same
Regard to Virgin-Decency are forc'd to give their Tongues a Loose and betray the Secrets of their Hearts Alas Noble Don Quixote de la Mancha I am one of those unhappy Persons over-rul'd by my Passion but yet so reserv'd and patient in my Sufferings that Silence broke my Heart and my Heart broke in Silence 'T is now two Days most inexorable and Marble-hearted Man since the Sense of your severe Usage and Cruelty brought me to my Death or something so like it that every one that saw me judg'd me to be dead And had not Love been compassionate and assign'd my Recovery on the Sufferings of this kind Squire I had ever remain'd in the other World Truly quoth Sancho Love might e'en as well have made Choice of my Ass for that Service and he would have obliged me a great deal more But pray good Mistress tell me one Thing now and so Heaven provide you a better natur'd Sweet-heart than my Master what did you see in the other World What Sort of Folks are there in Hell For there I suppose you have been for those that die of themselves must needs go to that Summer-house To tell you the Truth reply'd Altisidora I fancy I could not be dead out-right because I was not got so far as Hell for had I got in I 'm sure I should ne'er have been allow'd to have got out again I got to the Gates indeed where I found a round Dozen of Devils in their Breeches and Waste-coats playing at Tennis with flaming Rackets they wore flat Bands with scollop'd Lace and Ruffles of the same Their Arms were naked four Fingers Breadth to give an Air to their Wrists and make their Hands look the longer But what I most wonder'd at was that instead of Tennis-balls they made use of Books that were every whit as light and stuff'd with Wind and Flock or such Kind of Trumpery This was indeed most strange and wonderful but what still amaz'd me more I found that contrary to the Custom of Gamesters among whom the gaining Party at least is in good Humour and the Losers only angry these Hellish Tossers of Books of both sides did nothing but fret fume stamp curse and swear most horribly as if they had been all Losers That 's no Wonder at all quoth Sancho for your Devils whether they play or no win or lose they can never be contented That may be said Altisidora but another Thing that I admire I then admir'd I would say was that the Ball would not bear a second Blow but at every Stroke they were oblig'd to change Books some of 'em new some old which I thought very strange And one Accident that happen'd upon this I can't forget They tos'd up a new Book fairly bound and gave it such a smart Stroke that the very Guts flew out of it and all the Leaves were scatter'd about Then cry'd one of the Devils to another look look what Book is that 'T is the Second Part of the History of Don Quixote said the other not that which was compos'd by Cid Hamet the Author of the first but by a certain Arragonian who professes himself a Native of Tordesillas Away with it cry'd the first Devil down with it plunge it to the lowest Pit of Hell where I may never see it more Why is it such sad stuff said the other Such intolerable Stuff cry'd the first Devil that if I and all the Devils in Hell should set our Heads together to make it worse it were past our Skill The Devils continu'd their Game and shatter'd a World of other Books but the Name of Don Quixote that I so passionately ador'd confin'd my Thoughts only to that Part of the Vision which I told you It could be nothing but a Vision to be sure said Don Quixote for I am the only Person of that Name now in the Universe and that very Book is tos'd about here at the very same rate never resting in a Place for every Body has a Fling at it Nor am I concern'd that any Phantom assuming my Name should wander in the Shades of Darkness or in the Light of this World since I am not the Person of whom that History treats If it be well writ faithful and authentick it will live Ages but if it be bad 't will have but a bad Journey from its Birth to the Grave of Oblivion Altisidora was then going to renew her Expostulations and Complaints against Don Quixote had not he thus interrupted her I have often caution'd you Madam said he of fixing your Affections upon a Man who is absolutely uncapable of making a suitable Return It grieves me to have a Heart obtruded upon me when I have no Entertainment to give it but bare cold Thanks I was only born for Dulcinea del Toboso and to her alone the Destinies if such there be have devoted my Affection So 't is â—resumption for any other Beauty to imagine she can displace her or but share the Possession she holds in my Soul This I hope may suffice to take away all Foundation from your Hopes and to recal your Modesty and re-instate it in its proper Bounds for nothing is to be expected from a Man in Impossibilities Upon hearing this Death of my Life Cry'd Altisidora putting on a violent Passion thou Lump of Lead thou with a Soul of Morter and a Heart as little and as hard as the Stone of an Olive more stubborn than a fullen Plough-driver or a Carrier's Horse that will never go out of his Road I have a good Mind to tear your Eyes out as deep as they are in your Head Why thou beaten Swash-buckler thou Rib-roasted Knight of the Cudgel hast thou the Impudence to think that I dy'd for Love of thy Lanthorn-Jaws No no Sir Tiffany all that you have seen this Night has been Counterfeit for I would not suffer the Pain of a Flea-bite much less that of dying for such a Dromedary as thou art Troth Lass I believe thee quoth Sancho for all these Stories of People dying for Love are meer Tales of a roasted Horse They tell you they 'll dye for Love but the Devil a-bit Trust to that and be laugh'd at Their Discourse was interrupted by the coming in of the Harper Singer and Composer of the Stanza's that were perform'd in the Court the Night before Sir Knight said he to Don Quixote making a profound Obeisance let me beg the Favour of being number'd among your most humble Servants 't is an Honour which I have long been ambitious to receive in regard of your great Renown and the Value of your Atchievements Pray Sir said Don Quixote let me know who you are that I may proportion my Respects to your Merits The Spark gave him to understand he was the Person that made and sung the Verses he heard the last Night Truly Sir said Don Quixote you have an excellent Voice but I think your Poetry was little to the Purpose for what Relation pray have
you The Niece and Maid who without Doubt were good-natur'd Creatures undress'd him put him to Bed brought him something to eat and tended him with all imaginable Care CHAP. LXXIV How Don Quixote fell sick made his last Will and died AS all humane Things especially the Lives of Men are transitory their very Beginnings being but Steps to their Dissolution so Don Quixote who was no way exempted from the common Fate was snatch'd away by Death when he least expected it Whether his Sickness was the Effect of his melancholick Reflections or pre-ordain'd by the Heavens I will not determine but he was seiz'd with a violent Feaver that confin'd him to his Bed six Days All that Time his good Friends the Curate Batchelor and Barber came often to see him and his trusty Squire Sancho Pança never stirr'd from his Bed-side They conjectur'd that his Sickness proceeded from the Regret of his Defeat and his being disappointed of Dulcinea's Dis-inchantment and accordingly they left nothing unessay'd to divert him The Batchelor begg'd him to pluck up a good Heart and rise that they might begin their Pastoral Life telling him that he had already writ an Eclogue to that Purpose not inferiour to those of Sannazaro and that he bought with his own Money of a Shepherd of Quintana two tearing Dogs to watch their Flock the one call'd Barcino and the other Bueron but this had no Effect on Don Quixote for he still continu'd dejected A Physician was sent for who upon feeling his Pulse did not very well like it and therefore desir'd him of all Things to provide for his Soul's Health for that of his Body was in a dangerous Condition Don Quixote heard this with much more Temper than those about him for his Niece his House-keeper and his Squire fell a weeping as bitterly as if he had been laid out already Don Quixote desir'd them to leave him a little to himself because he found himself inclinable to Rest they retir'd and he had a hearty Sleep of above Six Hours which the Maid and Niece were afraid would be his last At length he wak'd and with a loud Voice Blessed be the Almighty cry'd he for this great Benefit he has vouchsafed to do me Infinite are his Mercies they are greater and more in Number than the Sins of Men. The Niece harkening very attentively to these Words of her Uncle and finding more Sense in them than there was in his usual Talk at least since he had fallen ill What do you say Sir said she has any Thing extraordinary happen'd What Mercies are these you mention Mercies answer'd he that Heaven has this Moment vouchsafed to shew me in spite of all my Iniquities My Judgment is return'd clear and undisturb'd and that Cloud of Ignorance is now remov'd which the continual Reading of those damnable Books of Knight-Errantry had cast over my Understanding Now I perceive their Nonsense and Impertinence and am only sorry the Discovery happens so late when I want Time to make Amends by those Studies that shou'd enlighten my Soul and prepare me for Futurity I find Niece my End approaches but I wou'd have it such that tho' my Life has got me the Character of a Mad-man I may deserve a better at my Death Dear Child continu'd he send for my honest Friends the Curate the Batchelor Carrasco and Master Nicholas the Barber for I intend to make my Confession and my Will His Niece was sav'd the Trouble of sending for presently they all three came in which Don Quixote perceiving My good Friends said he I have happy News to tell you I am no longer Don Quixote de la Mancha but Alonso Quixano the same whom the World for his fair Behaviour has been pleas'd to call the Good I now declare my self an Enemy to Amadis de Gaul and his whole Generation all profane Stories of Knight-Errantry all Romances I detest I have a true Sense of the Danger of reading them and of all my pass'd Follies and thro' Heaven's Mercy and my own Experience I abhor them His three Friends were not a little surprized to hear him talk at this rate and concluded some new Frenzy had possess'd him What now said Sampson to him What 's all this to the Purpose Signior Don Quixote We have just had the News that the Lady Dulcinea is dis-inchanted and now we are upon the point of turning Shepherds to sing and live like Princes you are dwindl'd down to a Hermit No more of that I beseech you reply'd Don Quixote all the Use I shall make of these Follies at present is to heighten my Repentance and though they have hitherto prov'd prejudicial yet by the Assistance of Heaven they may turn to my Advantage at my Death I find it comes fast upon me therefore pray Gentlemen let us be serious I want a Priest to receive my Confession and a Scrivener to draw up my Will There 's no trifling at a Time like this I must take Care of my Soul and therefore pray let the Scrivener be sent for while Mr. Curate prepares me by Confession Don Quixote's Words put them all into such Admiration that they stood gazing upon one another they thought they had Reason to doubt of the Return of his Understanding and yet they cou'd not help believing him They were also apprehensive he was near the Point of Death considering the sudden Recovery of his Intellects and he deliver'd himself after that with so much Sense Discretion and Piety and shew'd himself so resign'd to the Will of Heaven that they made no Scruple to believe him restor'd to his perfect Judgement at last The Curate thereupon clear'd the Room of all the Company but himself and Don Quixote and then confess'd him In the mean time the Batchelor ran for the Scrivener and presently brought him with him and Sancha Pança being inform'd by the Batchelor how ill his Master was and finding his Niece and House-keeper all in Tears began to make wry Faces and fall a crying The Curate having heard the sick Person 's Confession came out and told them that the good Alonso Quixano was very near his End and certainly in his Senses and therefore they had best go in that he might make his Will These dismal Tidings open'd the Sluices of the House-keeper's the Niece's and the good Squire 's swollen Eyes so that a whole Inundation of Tears burst out of those Flood-Gates and a thousand Sighs from their Hearts for indeed either as Alonso Quixano or as Don Quixote de la Mancha as it has been observ'd the sick Gentleman had always shew'd himself such a good-natur'd Man and of so agreeable a Conversation that he was not only belov'd by his Family but by every one that knew him The Scrivener with the rest of the Company then went into the Chamber and the Preamble and formal Part of the Will being drawn and the Testator having recommended his Soul to Heaven and bequeath'd his Body to the Earth according to