not thy iustice and my desertes but remember thy mercies and my miseries thinke not vpon thy hate towardes offenders but thinke vpon thy loue towardes thy creatures cast thy seuere eye of reuenge vpon thy sonne but looke vpon me with thy eye of pitty O deare God hell is alreadie full and what profite is there in my distructioÌ„ Also many millions of sinners will neuer come vnto thee will neuer cal nor care for thy helpe so that if thou reiectest the repentant and sorrowfull sinner who then shall bee saued and whome wilte thou fâ—â—de righteous if 〈◊〉 iudgest without mercie When I was not O Lord thy fingers framed mee and thou neither hatest nor contemnest any thinge that thou hast made When I was a captiue of the deuill a slaue of hell thou didest send thy beloued sonne to die for my redemption and do not now I beseech thee cast that away which thou hâ—â—â— purchased at soe â—â—gh a price When I walked in my owne wicked waies thou didst patiently endure me mightily preserue me and graciously call mee and wilt thou not now beestow one louinge looke vpon mee Why then O louing God looke vpon thy beloued sonne behold what hee hath suffered of thy goodnesse call him to thy remembraÌ„ce for whom thy will his obedience did cause him to suffer Behold his bitter agonies wherein his bodie was sprinkled with a bloodie sweate beeholde his backe torne with whips his head pricked with thornes his face defiled with spitting behold his blessed body so strained vpon the crosse that all his bones might be numbred behold his harmlesse handes his vndefiled feete pierced with sharpe nailes behold his naked side strooke through with a speare behold the aboundance of blood which gushed forth of those holy fountaines which blood still streameth fresh in thy sight and now pleadeth for my pardon Beholde O gracious God how his feeling was possessed with paine his hearing with reproach his eies with scorne his tast with gall beholde howe his neck bowed his heade hung his breast beat how his sight waxed dimme his countenaÌ„ce pale his legs armes stiffe how hee groaned how hee gasped and gaue vp the ghost Behold the preist behold the sacrifice euen the lambe vndefiled gloriously imbrued with his owne blood Gracious and mercifull God by this thy sonne by this my Sauiour I most humbly beeseech thee to looke fauourably vpon me encline thine eares towardes me hide not thy face now my soule is troubled Graciouslie receiue the lost sheepe which strayinge from thy pastures through sinne and flying from thy presence through a guiltie conscience hee hath louinglye sought and ioyfullye doth bring vnto thee vpon his own shoulders Heare mee O God of all power turne towardes mee and let thy mercies accept his merits for full satisfaction of my misdeedes O infinite mercie thou hast sett vs a way and giuen vs a light thou hast threaned vs the paines of hell and promised vs the ioies of heauen now pierce my flesh with thy feare that I may auoide the one and inflame my soule with thy loue that I may attain the other Grante I praye thee that as longe traueilers are therby taught to loue their owne cuntrey soe my former errâ—urs may henceforth bee a meane to hould mee in the right path that beeing led by thee walking through thee I may come vnto thee and rest in thee for wee sillie wormes are vnable to enter into thine eternitie vnlesse thou who hast created vs doest guide vs in Saue O God who desirest not the deth of a sinner saue my sinnefull soule which flieth froÌ„ thy feareful iustice to thy comfortable mercies from the desert of my sinne to the desert of thy Sonne This O God is easie to thy power and vsuall to thy mercie and agreeable to thy will Such are the witlesse wilfull right as is the heedles flie Which kils it selfe hurtes his sight has hath her in his eie Sperate miseri Cauete faelices The death of Saintes is precious Psal. 125. Miserable is the death of Sinners Psal 53. The III. Deuotion The guiltines of sinne and the consideration of Death calleth the sinner to call vpon God for his mercy in Iesu Christ. O Most high most holye moste mightye most mercifull most good most goodly most louinge most fearefull and terrible God the Creator the renuer the maintainer of all thinges whome to know is to bee wise whome to serue is to raigne whome to loue is the life and happinesse of the soule behold I pore wretch to thee who art both rich and liberall I miserable to thee who art both pittifull and plentifull do draw neere behold a hunger-starued begger knocketh at thy doore open vnto mee O honourable householder without whome all aboundance is beggerie open I say thy mercies to my miseries and although I am not worthy to sitte at thy feast with thy sons yet with the basest of thy seruantes let me bee refreshed with some broken pieces that are taken from thy table Thou hast commaunded vs O gratious God to knock to aske and to seeke whereuppon thou hast promised to open to geue and to bee founde beholde now my sighinge doth seeke thee my teares crie vnto thee and the groanes of my payned soule do knocke at the gate of thy mercies behold Lord I am desirous to doe thy will performe thou I besech thee thy word And first O Lorde I acknowledge against my selfe that I was conceiued in iniquitie and borne in miserie but thou of thy free loue diddest cleanse mee thou diddest sanctifie me thou didst through faith on my part and mercy on thyne betroath thy selfe vnto me Yet I vnmindfull of so greate goodnes haue since with many a foule fact distained my selfe and dishonored thee not dreading thy displeasure whole wrath maketh the deuells to quake I was borne in necessary but I pluÌ„ged my selfe in voluntarie sinnes I made no conscience in offending thee feared not to forgett thy lawe Notwithstandinge thou accordinge to thy wonted mercies diddest not banish mee from thy protection but as though I had daylye and duly obserued thy will thou diddest bountifullye heape thy benifites vppon mee so much vndeserued of mee as not desired When I sinned against thee the deuill was readie to haue made a pray of mee I was content I was desirous to haue perished with him but thou O Lord diddest driue backe him and draw backe me not onely without either my request or knowledge but very much against my mind When I was in daunger of death both by sickenesse casualties and my soule was so rocked a sleepe in sinnefull securitie so burdened with the weight of wicked actions that it must needes haue suncke downe into hell thy grace stoode by mee thy power did preserue both my body from death and my soule from damnation I did offend thee but thou diddest defend mee I did deserue death but thou diddest preserue life I did not regard thee when thou
to his feast I coulde neyther see nor sorrowe for my sinnes did not he both enlighten my vnderstanding and soften my sences Hee hath not enlightened my vnderstandinge to drowne it in darknes he hath not softned my sences because he could not breake them and why then hath hee thus wakened the one and weakened the other It is euen soe hee that hath hetherto in patience expected mee doeth now in pittie call me Speake then Lord speake vnto thy seruant thunder into the inner eare of my harte breake my deafenesse that I may heare thy voice Lorde thou lookest for mine amendmente that I may haue thy fauour and I looke for thy fauour that I may amende Woe is mee how longe haue I staied Alas how late doe I come how slowlye doe I hasten howe doeth my resolution stick betweene loathnesse and necessitie woe is me wretch how cunningly doth the deuell seeke to delay mee what arte hath he vsed to keepe the line from breaking wherat the fish was caught not drawing him violently but letting him play vpon the hooke which hee soe greedely had swallowed O my God the sunne of my life hath passed his Meridian and I am now in the after noone of my age the night of nature will come fast vpon mee when death as Gods sergeant will arrest my bodie vpon debt to nature her selfe my soule vpon trespasse committed against God The one hee will binde hand and foote and committe close prisoner to the graue the other he will arraigne in the high court of heauen where God shall bee both partie and iudge to aunsweare to all obiections as well of errour as of contempt At this houre of death when the sinnfull soule beginneth to bee loosed from the fetters of flesh O good God howe is it troubled what terrours are presented vnto it Then beginneth it to throwe the thoughtes freely into euery corner of the conscience to see the sinnes which it hath done to perceiue the vengeance that it hath deserued to consider that the time of repentance is then at an end and that it is set vpon the immoueable pointe of passage to a most stricte triall vncertaine howe the best actions that it hath done shall bee examined It is desirous to stay it is compelled to goe and as it often happeneth that whilest one thinketh too much of dooing he leaueth to doe the effect of his thinking soe whilest it lamenteth the losse of all the time that is past it looseth that little which then remaineth Looking backe it esteemeth the whole race which it hath runne as a short steppe looking forward it behouldeth the infinite space of eternytie wherin it hath to continue lifting vp the minde to heauen it discouereth a most bright beautifull glorie againe castinge it downe vpon the earth it seeth all thinges enfoulded in a mistie darknesse Heereupon a new swarme of thoughts stingeth the minde It lamenteth that it was soe chained with the enchauntmentes of a momentanie estate as scarce to thinke vpon the condition which neuer shall haue end that to satisfie the flesh which is to be a nest of wormes it hath neglected the spirite which was to haue bin a companion of Angells that it hath lost for soe short a shewe the eternall substance of pleasure that it hath exchanged the treasure of immortall glorie for the trash of floating vanitie O if it had but a smal time more of amendment how seriously would it conuerte what a sharpe and seuere course would it set into but it is like vnto a horse desirous to runne miserably spurred but soe short reined that hee cannot stirre or like vnto those who in their dreames are taken with some fearfull vision which sweate with payne and striue to crie for helpe but cannot finde any strength to crie In the meane time the head shooteth the back aketh the hart panteth the throate ruttleth the tongue faultreth the breath shortneth the flesh trembleth the veines beate the hart stringes crack the eyes wex dimme the nose sharpe the browes harde the cheekes colde and wanne the lippes pale the handes numme the iointes stiffe the whole bodie is in a colde sweat the strength fainting the life vanished and death drawing on Neither will the children and friendes for whose sake the sick shall often thinke them selues damned for beare in this instant of extremitie but continually like flesh flies they will offer molestation Whilst these summoners of death doe execute their office all the wicked actions wordes and thoughts are broght into presence they are heaped together and aggrauated to the vttermost they giue the conscience many a colde pull and lie vpon the hart as heavie as leade Faine would the sinner turne away his eye but hee shall bee compelled to behold them they will all crie vnto him wee are thy workes wee will goe with thee Then shall the conscience sharplye accuse the memory giue bitter euidence reason shall sit as iudge feare shall stand as executioner and scarce is there any seuere sentence in all the bible against sinne which the deuell will not bring into minde vrging euery poynt and amplifying it by construction Then will resolution bee turned to trembling pride into basenesse confidence into despaire Then will bee a greate difference in iudgment from that which men beare commonly in this worlde in soe much as the sinner shall be forced to cry and confesse we simple men thought their life to be but madnesse whose end wee now esteeme most honourable but wee haue wearied our selues in craggye waies wee are worne out in pursuing vanity and the waies of the Lorde wee haue not knowne Neuer did tirant exercise his rage with greatet cruelty vpon anye that hee most hated then the miserable sinner shall then vpon him selfe in iustly condemninge in vainly acknowledging in vnprofitably lamenting the errours of his actions whilest the paines of parting shall drawe the powers of the minde from true repentance All vaine pleasures are then at an end and as quite forgotten as if they had neuer bin at all Yea euery wicked delighte shall geue sharp twitches to the soule especially whē it considereth that it is to endure the smart for manye thinges wherof it must leaue the plesure to others Somtimes the sinner more able to abide death then the feare of death wisheth to bee discharged from beeinge guided by soe euell a soule not in full hope that his tormentes shall thereby either end or abate but according to the nature of greife the present being most painfull hee desireth to chang and to put in aduenture the ensuing But when he doth perceiue infinite legions of deuells prepared to receiue him and the horrours of hell open for his entertainment then is hee in a maze of amazement then like one that houldeth a wolfe by the eare bitten whilest hee holdeth and slaine when hee lett goe Well then secure and sencelesse soule howsoeuer the deuell woulde beare thee in hande as hee did thy first parentes
that thou shalt not die yet assure thy selfe this heauie houre this fearfull this dangerous this vnauoidable passage is not farre from thee euen in the fardest and fairest course of nature and may bee euerye houre by many vsuall accidentes both of violence and of sicknesse Thy continuance is onely certaine in vncertaintie and God would haue the time vnknowne because thou shouldest bee allwayes readie Awake therfore and watch ouer thy selfe looke vpon the pale horse and him that sitteth thereon whose name is Death prouide that thou be not sodainely surprised and die before thou beginne to liue Loose not the offer of occasion whilest it may not onely bee taken but offereth yea sueth to bee taken and if it be not now taken will neuer heereafter be ouertaken Christ yet distributeth the treasures of hys mercye the doore standeth yet open to all that will bee suiters for the same his nature is nowe as apte to forgeue as hys power will be able hereafter to punish The kings of Israell were not so famous for heir mercy among the seruauntes of Abinadab as the God is among vs. When thou didst sinne hee did spare when thou didst deferre he did expect when thou shalt returne he will eÌ„brace The bowelles of his mercie doe still ouerflowe neyther wante their issues to deriue the streames thereof into thy soule his backe was torne hys handes and feete were pierced hys side was opened throughe these holes thou maist see the aboundaunce of his loue at these holy holes thou maist taste the sweetenesse of hys mercy Present thy selfe therefore vnto him in all those humble behauiours which the consideration of his maiestie and thy miserie can possibly frame be penitent for the time past and resolue for the time to come and with as greate confidence as necessitie crye vnto him and say O Christ O eternall light O life of all thinges to whom nothing is soe greate that it can resist nothinge soe small that it is contemptible whom no man is soe good that he doth not neede noe man soe euell that he may not hope I beseech thee by the noblâ—st title that in my greatest affliction I can geue my selfe that I am thy creature and by thy onely name of comfort vnto sinners that thou art mercifull heare my vile voyce helpe my distressed soule and in the time of necessitie and trouble bee graâ—ious vnto me Behold O Lord howe my conscience lyeth queasomed vnder the multitude of my offences behold how I am borne downe wyth the weight of my owne weakenesse and doe not thou whose propertie is not onely to spare but to helpe eyther lighten the burthen or lay vnder thy heauenlye hand my soule must needes sincke downe into hell But thou O Lord hast neither delight nor likinge in the death of sinners thou didst dy to raise vs vp from the death of sin O good Iesu thou diddest redeeme vs when wee were thine enemies and shall wee bee destroied now wee are thy suppliantes thou diddest call vs to mercie when wee craued none and wilt thou denye vs now we are suiters for it through thy death wee were brought vnto life and shall we dy now thou doest lâ—ue O thou whoe helpest the weake wich a worde behoulde I come I call I looke for thy mercie hide not thy face stoppe not thine eare cast mee not out of thy regarde let it suffice that I feel mine own weaknesse and want least I should haue beene too proud in my selfe now let thy power and plentye appeare that thereby I may bee confident in thee O Christ the guide of those that seeke thee the light of those that see thee and the life of those that loue thee O sweete Sauiour what shall I say whether shall I goe where shall I seeke thee or wherefore doe I not see thee O my God if thou bee absent from mee where shall I seeeke thee if in all places thou art present wherefore doe I not see thee O infinite goodnesse passing all humane both search and sight thou both fillest and includest all thinges thou art in euerie place present without either seate or motion giue mee grace for thy loue and desires sake I beeseech thee to cast off the blinde burthen of fleshlye affections subdue my reason regenerate my will and purifie my nature lead my desire that I may seeke thee lighten my vnderstandinge that I may see thee for I can neither seeke thee without thou direct mee nor see thee except thou reueale thy selfe Gracious God I haue noe goodnesse in my selfe but onely to finde that I haue no goodnesse like a scholler who is come to that degree of knowledge to knowe him selfe vtterly ignorante but suffer I beseech thee some beutifull beame of thy maiestie to shine into my soule disperse the cloudes wherwith my conscience is ouercast melt the mistie darknesse which couereth my vnderstanding O thou who saydest let there be light and light was made speake the worde and my soule shall bee enlightened that I may playnly see thee and perfectly knowe thee and ardently both desire and loue thee O surpassinge light deliuer mee from the shadow both of ignorance and errour and consequently from the darkenesse of death swallow me vp in the depth of thy brightnesse dazell my eyes that I maye not bee able to see any thing but thee possesse all my bodily sences that my sinnefull affections or rather defections may finde no place but that I maye soe feele thee that I haue noe feelinge of my selfe O Lord of life allthough I am a sinner yet I am thy creature beecause thou hast made mee yea and made me againe both by redeeming and by often renuing mee helpe mee therefore whome of thy goodnesse thou hast fashioned let mee not perish in my miserie whom of thy mercie thou hast redeemed gouerne mee heerafter whome hetherto thou hast preserued despise not O Lord the worke of thine owne handes For wherfore hast thou created mee beecause thou wouldest damne mee It had bin better for mee neuer to haue bin made then to bee confounded in my owne corruption Listen O Lord to the crie of thy poore Orphane cast mee not off in thy displeasure and my distresse forsake mee not for thy sake I beeseech thee And although I haue in such sorte both defiled and defaced this thy creature that thou mayest iustly refuse to take knowledge of mee yet by thy mercies I pray thee wherein thou art more wonderfull then in all thy workes remoue the one and renue the other rubbe out with thy bloode the staines which sticke in my soule and then thou wilt knowe it to bee thy creature O Lord my God at whose presence all powers doe shake at whose becke all creatures obey looke fauourably vpon me from thy glorious seate let thy maiestie shine vnto mee through thy mercie bee not angrye with vs wormish weak elinges although we offend for thou knowest what wee are and whereof we are made Is not man rottennesse are not
his desires vanitie is not his life miserie and a verye shadowe of death wilt thou shewe thy strength against a worme against a leafe against a blast O thou who grantest truce of life there are but twoe pleas before thy throne either of innocencie or els of mercie I doe cleerely debarre my selues of the one oh let my soule runne into the armes of the other Haue mercie vpon mee O gracious God haue mercy vpon mee a most wretched creature deale not with mee according to my desertes but according to the greatnesse of thy mercie which is infinitely more then the sinnes of the whole world O almighty God from whose sight there is noe couert and against whose power ther is neither resistance nor flight looke not vppon mee with thy eie of iustice drawe not thy sworde of vengence against mee but extend that compassion which thou hast soe graciously soe deerelye purchased for mee I acknowledge indeede that amonge all and aboue all sinners I am wretched I acknowledge also that I am vnable to satisfie for my sinnes but O sonne of God beehold that in thy selfe which may moue thee to haue compassion vppon mee Soe often as thou beehouldest the woundes of thy bruised bodie soe often let pittie pierce thy harte Soe often as thou behouldest the blessed streames of thy bloode wherof one droppe had bin sufficient for redemption of the whole worlde soe often couer my sinnes and recouer mee Forgiue my ignorance forget my presumption pardone my iniquities relieue my necessities let my sinnes no longer bee a cloude betweene my prayer and thy pittie beetweene thy goodnesse and my distresse most gracious God who art mercifull towardes all suffer not mee to bee distitute of thy mercie for although I haue committed that whereby I maye bee damned yet hast thou neither forgone nor forgotten that wherby thou art wout to saue O wretch that I am how coldly doe I crie how weakly doe I craue woe is me wretch how is my harte hardened that mine eies doe not poure forth plentie of teares how sencelesse is my vncleane soule that my flesh tremble not that my iointes doe not shake vntill my knees knocke together But wherefore do I expostulate with a dead carcase Alasse I am nothinge but vanitie a rotten roote without anye life of vertue a barren grounde bringing forth nothinge but sinne shame and damnation I am vnable either to giue thee any thing but of thine owne goodes or to doe any thinge for my selfe but by thy free guifte Wherefore O sweete sauiour by thy tender loue and by all thy mercies I beeseech thee giue mee grace that with thy goodes and by thy guiftes I may serue thee and sorrowe for my sinnes giue mee alsoe a floude of teares in token of thy fauour that I may sweetlye poure them beefore thy presence with greate reuerence and feare in bewailinge mine offences Mollifie my stonie harte illuminate my mistie minde subdue my flesh to my soule my soule vnto reason my reason to faith let mee ioie only in enioyinge thee in whome desire neuer wanteth sacietie and sacietie neuer breede dislike Come thou into mee that I may remaine in thee shake off these shackles free me from this weight of fleshly affections that leauing and loathing all earthlye desires I may firmelye resolue speedely beginne and constantlye continue in dooinge and sufferinge thy holy will Poure vpoÌ„ my hart the sweete stremes of thy grace that therby my affectioÌ„s may be framed to honour thee as a Creator to loue thee as a redeemer to expect thee as a Sauiour to feare as a iudge Let mee allwaies bee humbled beefore thee and neuer bee high minded but onelye in mindinge thinges on high Write thy name with thy owne finger within the tables of my breast neuer to be either shadowed or worne out that I may continually feede my hungry hoâ—es with stedfast remembrance and regard of thee for firmly to remember reuerently to regard thee is our mortall manner both of holdinge and beeholding thee Let the firie force of thy loue swallow vp my soule that being altogether possessed therwith it may neither feele nor desire nor once thinke vpoÌ„ any erthly thing but bee alwaies and onely not onelye ioined but vnited to thee for as thy goodnesse towardes vs is vnmeasurable and infinite soe wee are bound to loue thee without either measure or end Lorde my whole desire is before thee and my thoughtes are not secret from thy sight turne not thy countenance from my complaint heare mee O my God and grant my petion grant my petion that thou mayst heare mee Reach mee thy helping hande draw my soule out of the mire of sinne wherin it is fast set that I perish not in the presence of thy pittie Deliuer mee froÌ„ the snares that th' enemy hath laid to take the souls of sinners ether willfull or secure cutt away occsions of euell beefore mee guide mee vnto thee the streightest course and soe long as I am to continue in this vile vale of miserie settle mee in that state of life wherein I may best please thee and pleasure others Giue mee grace O gracious God that although I haue hetherto had noe care to liue well yet nowe I may wholly and holyly bend my care to die well that from henceforth I may liue in thy feare die in thy fauour rest in thy peace rise in thy power and remaine in thy ioie Amen Nec pudet viuere nec piget mori Call vpon mee in the day of tribulation I will deliuer thee and thou shalt praise mee Psal. 50. The IIII. Deuotion A Thankesgiuing intermixt with confession and prayer O Lorde Iesus infinite in pitie infinite in power infiite allsoe both in thy rewards and in thy reuenge I am weakly thou knowest rather willing then desirous with my soule to loue thee with my flesh to feare thee with my minde to honor thee with my mouth to praise thee with my whole substance to serue thee to commend my whole substance vnto thy protection But alas I am soe clogged with corruption I am soe drowned in flesh and bloud that I scarce either dare or can lifâ— vp my head and looke vnto thee and yet why should I bee ashamed when thou doest inuite mee why should I bee faint when thou doest not onely incourage but alsoe enable mee or at the least accept my weake endeuour Striue then O the verie bowels of my soule striue with all your strength to raise your thoughtes out of this mire of mortallitie wherein they sticke out of these waues of fleshly affections wherein they floate without either firme footinge or certaine drift Aduance thy selfe towardes thy creator Frame thy affections to loue him for his goodnes to honour him for greatnes to reioice in him for his merites to pray vnto him for his mercies which daylye thou doest neede and by needing doest craue and by crauing doest obtaine if not according to thy desires yet verye farre aboue