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A30867 Directions for love and marriage in two books / written originally by Franciscus Barbarus, a Venetian senator ; and now translated into English by a person of quality.; De re uxoria. English. 1677 Barbaro, Francesco, ca. 1398-1454. 1677 (1677) Wing B683A; ESTC R40747 52,052 138

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constancy of her vertue and love wonderfully loved and delighted in her Husband Abradatus Prince of Susa and being a Captive preserved her Faith to him and made Cyrus his Friend and did not riotously wasted but employed all her riches all her treasures in adorning him he fighting most valiantly against the Egyptians the Associates of Croesus both that he might be grateful to Cyrus and might seem a Husband worthy of Panthia his Wife he generously dyed having performed the duty of a valiant Commander and stout Souldier whose Obsequies that she might most nobly celebrate she slew her self upon his dead body sought with singular diligence Cassandane so loved Cyrus that when she dyed it was more grievous to her to depart from Cyrus than from her life wherefore Cyrus lest he should be an ungrateful Husband lamented her a long time after her death and for her honours sake commanded all those whom he governed to mourn Themistocles his Wife loved him so well that she was believed to think of nothing but the affection and love of her Husband whereby it came to pass that that most famous Governour of Grecia might yield to her in all things and it may be truly said that she could do more than the other Grecians of her time for whatsoever she desired the same Themistocles did desire whatsoever Themistocles that the Athenians wished whatsoever the Athenians that all Grecia desired Thesta the Sister of Dionysius the elder was married to Polyxenus he afterwards being offended by the Tyrant fled for fear out of Sicily Dionysius calls for his Sister and blames her because she knowing of her Husbands flight did not acquaint him therewith Thesta relying upon her constancy and singular vertue answered O Dionysius do you think me such a vile and base Woman that if I had known of my Husbands flight I would have refused to have been a Companion and partaker of his Fortune it would truly have been more acceptable to me to be called Polyxenus his Wife though banished than the Sister of Dionysius the Tyrant The Syracusians admiring her noble mind after the Tyrants were expelled dignified her with Royal Honours and when she was dead all ranks all sorts of people and finally all the Syracusians were present at her Funeral Solemnities Armenia the Wife of Tigranes is a noble Example to Women for truly in that Expedition which Cyrus made against the Assyrians being by no means able to endure the absence of her Husband she followed him with a most willing mind every where as an unwearied Companion through so great perils Andromache in Homer how much she is delighted with her Hector upon whom she placed all her love she even declares by this expression You are my only Father reverend Mother and sweet Brother and Husband in all respects amiable At length being distracted by reason of his death she wildly runs through the multitude and views the Walls Cania an excellent Woman hath obtained a commemoration of her Virtue in this place for although the narration thereof will be long yet the dignity novelty and variety will be pleasant both to you and to those who shall peruse these things whose remarkable Enterprize we will begin to relate more copiously Sinatus and Sinorix united in Kindred to each other undoubtedly excelled the other Tetrarchs of France in puissance renown and glory of whom Sinatus espoused Cania who not only excelled in beauty of Body but also in singular Virtue she being indued with chastity goodness prudence and magnanimity obliged the hearts of all Persons to her self with a certain admirable love The Priesthood of Diana whom the French especially worship rendred her more famous in which both for the sake of her own and her Ancestors dignity she had the chief Authority for at the Sacrifices being always exceedingly adorned she attracted the Eyes of all upon her self First Sinorix began to love her fervently afterwards he intends the death of his Kinsman because he feared that whilst the other was safe his desires could not be effected therefore that wicked Man blinded with the great love of his Mistriss privately slayeth the negligent Sinatus Not long after he earnestly desires to Marry Cania who couragiously sustaining the misfortune of her Husband vehemently endeavoured and prudently expected an occasion and opportunity to revenge the wicked Fact of Sinorix Sinorix urgeth that the Marriage indeed deadly may be accomplished he alledgeth honest causes of his mistake if we may think that honest which is contaminated with the greatest wickedness at the first Cania rejects his entreaties afterwards her Relations that they might for ever oblige that most potent Prince to themselves earnestly urge her to be content to Marry him then as if perswaded she promiseth that she would and henceforth she entertains familiarly the young Man that was brought to her and they entred together the Temple of Diana that that French Goddess being witness their Covenant and Promise might be established afterwards deliberately taking a Cup in her Hands she first drinks the remainder she gave to Sinorix to drink but there was in the Cup Metheglin mixed with Poison which when she perceived Sinorix had drunk she manifested her joy by her Eyes Countenace and Fore-head and turning to the Image of Diana she spoke after this manner O Divine Parent I call you to witness that I would not have survived Sinatus in good truth for the love of life which being retained indeed afflicted me with sorrows but being laid down may deliver me from troubles but that I determined to live to atchieve the transactions of this day nor that I should have perceived any pleasure in my life after the Funeral of my Husband which was mournful to me and lamentable to his Country unless a certain hope of revenge had now and then comforted me which being now effected I now willingly descend to my dearest and best Husband Sinatus O most cruel Sinorix instead of Marriage Beds and Nuptials Sepulchres may be prepared for you a little while after when as now the Poison had largely spread it self through their Bodies Sinorix first then Cania died Stratonica so loved her Husband Dejotarus that she thought that nothing appertained to her but how she should fulfill his will and therefore she greatly grieved or rather lamented to see Dejotarus afflicted because he perceived that he neither had issue by her nor that she could succeed him in the Kingdom she therefore of her own accord provides a woman comely in countenance and manners called Electra and perswades desires and urges her Husband who admired the affection and constancy of his Wife to a privacy with her Afterwards she took care of educated and most honourably governed the Children begotten of her even as her own I should be too tedious if I should repeat the earnest affection of Tertia Emilia to P. Cornelius Scipio or if I should remember the exceeding great love of Julia Porcia Artemisia Hipsicratea and the other Examples of lawful love which
causes times and conjunctures of things for Judgment and Prudence which the Ancients defined to be the Production of Experience and Memory are necessary for us Since therefore we have already treated of the Age of a Wife in the next place we design to discourse of her Nobility upon which we shall insist more largely CHAP. IV. Concerning the Nobility of a Wife to be chosen I Wish O dear Laurentius the Matter would suffer to speak all I can excogitate concerning Descent it self I could more abundantly evidence as I suppose that the Arms of our Ancestours ought to be more esteemed than that Custome will permit which now daily grows more and more in use among us Yet for the present we shall relate some things which seem most advantagious and excellent other things perhaps we shall handle more largely hereafter Therefore I intend to begin herein from Nature it self A Pasture flourishing Planted and Sown Field does greatly assure us that for the sake of our Posterity we should celebrate the Nuptial Rites with Women nobly born Seeds are reduced into their proper origins and we find that those are the best Crops which are produc'd by the most excellent Corn and we know that very many and those the best sorts of Berries Nuts and Shrubs will not grow but in their proper and fertile Soils and if they be transplanted to a more barren Soil they lose their Natural Virtue and Apples losing their former juice degenerate also excellent Ciens if they be Ingrafted in bad Stocks bear worse Fruits Which is also incident to Men themselves that they expect far more Illustrious Children from Noble Women Hence chiefly we discern in them the representations of their Mothers bodies and minds as we see in most Children and it is certain that a Woman is of great concern in the Generation of Children For as some judicious Physitians assert that a Female is chiefly procreated by the Woman It is very noble that the Civil Law allows Children to enjoy honour from their Mothers for as it is instituted by the Roman Laws it is certain that all those were accounted free born who had Noble Mothers although their Fathers were Slaves which also we observe that the Law-givers of the Lycians enacted among whom if any Noble Woman Married an Ignoble Servant yet the Children begotten of her were Noble Poets testifie this to us who affirm that those who have a Goddess for their Mother are Divine We should want time if we should enumerate particulars but Aeneas Achilles and Orpheus chiefly for this reason are accounted Deities Neither does the Nobleness of the Mother avail only to the procreation but much to the education of the Children who is so ignorant that he doth not perceive that this matter is of great importance to them that are born For the choicest Seeds being Sown that we may use an Analogy of the same kind unless the Field be Tilled with great care and industry the Corn will be obnoxious to many hazards No body can doubt that any thing is more esteemed by renowned Women than that the honour of the Parents may be more and more illustrated by the splendor of the Children of whom unless there be diligent care taken they will rather seem infamous in Vice than noble in Extraction Moreover the dignity and excellency of Ancestors often causeth that the Posterity is and is accounted worthy of the greatest honours also let them rely upon their own Virtues as they are obliged by the Laws of Nature for unless that their Virtues be evident in them they will perceive themselves degenerate with the greatest contumelies of all Men. And as the remembrance of former glory incites Souldiers accustomed to triumphs to be valiant and ardent so the remembrance of Domestick Renown will stimulate them who were before spontaneously earnest in the pursuit thereof They have an easie passage to honour who are of noble descent Who is not assur'd so that they be not excell'd in worth in other things that those should be preferr'd before mean Persons by the Suffrages of all Who is ignorant that although they are unworthy of honour by their own merits yet oftentimes many things are conceded to them for the sake of those most worthy Persons their Ancestors We read of many who would die for their Country both that they might perform their duty and leave a large Patrimony to their Children with the Memory of their Name for at Athens their Children were maintained at the publick charge who died for their Country At Rome a pedestral Statue was appointed to be erected in the Market-place for them who died in Embassage if that Office caused their death that it might be a Monument of their honourable death and add a lustre to their Children for ever Amongst us if in the troublesome and perilous times of our republick the earnest desire endeavour and vigilance of any is evident they are rewarded according to their deserts either with power or riches or honour and not they alone but also their Children and Posterity On some a City and the most honourable esteem in that City is conferr'd These things are spoken for this cause that it may be apparent that Parents should be advantagious and ornamental to their Children Neither would I have this to be understood as spoken of Fathers only but also of Mothers whose Virtue and Merit have oftentimes obtained much Renown for their Children with Posterity But the misfortune of an Ignoble Birth hath been so adverse to many that they could neither attain the state of Nobility nor from the obscurity of their Ancestors appear in lustre For the envy of others is always an obstacle to the advancements of mean Persons Dogs as the Proverb relates although they bark and are fierce against strangers yet are tractable to the Domesticks Therefore we are to retain the dignity of our Parents and communicate it to our Children which when other things are uncertain fading and transitory being firmly Rooted can by no force be subverted nor overthrown Neither yet therefore do I approve their Opinion who being meanly born endeavour to obtain most Noble Wives We may most aptly compare those Persons to them who when they cannot mount upon the tall Camels teach them after the Syrian manner to kneel and lye down for such Persons being incapable of advancement render the women more debased Therefore we will chiefly approve those Marriages whereby we being made more honourable shall render our Children more eminent and potent VVhence that ancient Roman Custome is thought to arise whereby it is prohibited to marry wives related to them lest the love whereto we are obliged by the right of this relation should be confin'd in narrow bounds and should in a manner deprive Posterity of much Felicity which might be attained by other affinities hither refers that union of friendship whereby a City is compacted by these kinds of amities as by some certainties But Claudius Nero that Plague and Pestilence