child of God dying daily respecteth not griefe by the measure and length He taketh vp his crosse ioyfully carrieth it hopefully and layes it downe gloriously A naturall death turnes the momentary crosses of some into eternall a Spirituall death vnto sinne reduceth that eternity to a moment here and turnes it to a happinesse euerlasting in the kingdome of Christ I will not lighten my burden by the memory of a corporall death but make my yoake easie by dying daily without which to die well can neuer be 34 The Laborinth of nature is more intricate and vnsearchable then the mysteries of diuinity Man hath a whole world of causes effects and ends of scruples and ambiguities in the one to exquire and discusse by himselfe and the helpe of his owne inuention and when hee hath strained his capacitie to the highest he must leaue more knots and difficulties vntouched then hee hath cleered and vntyed and what hee imagines perspicuously resolued lyes still in the way of reasonable opposition as partly true and partly false in all like the Sunne with the better halfe eclipsed But in the Theory of saluation if any more causes be necessary to be known then the efficient meritorious and instrumentall which are the Father the Sonne and Faith any other effect then the sauing of the soule or other end but the glory of God we may finde them truely reuealed by the Spirit of trueth I will passe by that immense Vniuersitie of Gods inscrutable wisedome with admiration and conteine my selfe in the suruey and search of mine owne little world where I finde a tenement of mortall clay inhabited with an immortall guest the reason whereof in their differences I conceiue to bee that the body being framed out of so fraile and contemptible a matter should waxing lofty be beaten down with that inherent apprehension Thou art but dust and ashes And thy soule contrarywise ennobled with the diuine image of her infusor should loath to vouchsafe an inglorious descent to the allectations of the flesh The end of their coniunction also that the body as through the ponderousnes of the predominant elements it declineth sinketh downeward so through the propertie of innate corruption it yeelding to a sluggishnesse sleepe and death in sinne should by the liuely and quickning faculty of the soule be eleuated and ronzed vp to associate her in an heauenly conuersation 35 I find an euen carriage is best that may impart curtesie to all too much familiaritie and secrets vnto none It was a wise shift of a noble Romane whose Lady importunate to know what was debated of that day at the Councell Table when he could not but in some sortsatisfie her instant demand hee answered the Priests had seene a Larke flying in the ayre with a golden helmet on his head and holding a speare in his foote which being heard shee broke the matter immediately to one of her maids shee againe to an other of her fellowes and so forward till it was spread through the Citie and passed for currant but then it receiued a checke and so was staied Some friends are of that sort they will curiously diue into ones brest and by serious inquisition make themselues priuy to the secrets of his knowledge to such I will commit no more then what my minde is ouercharged withall at the present meaning to take it vp againe in another place others are faster lockt but as faulty otherwise though Muske bee one of the sweetest perfumes it is none of the wholesomest and familiaritie though delightfull is incommodious for the concomitant disrespect and following contempt 36 So farre as auncient Fathers accord with holy Writ I will make vse of them and thus I will carie Augustine in my heart Bernard in my mouth and the rest of them before mine eies for soundnesse befits our faith a patheticall and feeling speech is requisite in praier and religious precedents are necessary for the whole life 37 Humane society is like a Ruby that being put into the fire certain houres becommeth afterward of the colour of a burning coale If I addict my selfe to the company of the vertuous I shall bee answerably affected if of the laciuious and disordered of a like blemished reputation 38 Alfonsus King of Aragon after an oratour had concluded an ample Panagerick of his praises answered if thou hast said trueth I thanke God for it if otherwise God grant mee grace that I may doe it Vicious philaty is now generall Vmpire insomuch as he that praiseth most pleaseth best and it is hard to say whither that good King did more heartily attribute glory vnto God or most now arrogate merit to themselues The faithfull heere see God darkely through a glasse which may bee a reason the greater part see him not at all and therefore glory in a sacralegious vsurpation of his due praises as not acknowledging any supernaturall efficient cause besides their owne nature and dexteritie If any thing praise worthy proceed from mee I am but the instrument God is the principall agent It is the effect of his grace and the manifestation of his goodnesse God in euery creature set a chracter of his glory in man his whole image that he might bee knowne to bee wholy his and not his owne 39 Cruell inuentions when flowing from ambitious policy are vsually layd frustrate to the vexation of the complotters the proceedings of Pharaoh and Haman against the Iewes doe witnesse it wherein we see cares and anxieties by due iustice aggravated vpon them both and Gods people safely deliuered from the malice of them both If I be not conscious I will not feare the disfauour of the mightiest their most enuious proiects of iniustice shall bee reflected from the glasse of mine innocencie to their owne trouble and disgrace 40 When the Sonnes of God ioyned themselues to the faire daughters of men they brought foorth no other fruit but Giganticke and monsterous ofsprings and when the soule condescendeth to the smooth enticement of the flesh thereon followeth the conception of hellish thoughts which breake foorth into horrid and mischieuous designements 41 The Scythian will accuse the Romane ayre as infectious and breeding feuers which is neuerthelesse very wholsome The Blackmoore wil deride the Indian as ill coloured lesse beautifufull then himselfe So custome and nature acquainting euery one best with his owne confirmes in him also a better liking of it then of others I will accustome my selfe so neere as I can to that which is good that I may dispraise nothing in others but what is euill and like nothing in my selfe but what I cannot liue well without 42 I will not bee to liberall in praising any nor to forward this sauours of folly that of flattery bee his vertues resplendent they will shine to others as well as to me if more concealed and priuate they shall be mistrusted of the ignorant for al me and I haply for them if more particular in application to my selfe then to others they will
eluded with her impostures that they can discerne nothing in the true colour and proportion from whence they confound Christ with Belial sinne with Sanctimonie loosing the sense of grace the horror of their sinnes the desire of things eternall the feare of punishments infernall euen by that neere and arct coniunction they haue with corporall delights The natural man perceiueth not the things that are of God for they are foolishnesse vnto him 1. Cor. 2.14 I said in my heart saith the Preacher Goe to now I will proue thee with toy therefore take thou pleasure in pleasant things and behold this also is vanitie I said of laughter thou art mad and of ioy what is this that thou doest Eccles 2.1.2 He did heere but purpose this course to himselfe which after hee had considerately discussed reputauit errorem he concluded to be so erronious and so meerely vaine that it was not worth the vndertaking yet afterward hee withheld not his eies from whatsoeuer they desired nor withdrew his heart from any ioy and when he had looked on all his workes and on all his trauell this was the sum againe Behold all is vanitie and vexation of the spirit So that if any Libertine distracted too farre with the concupiscence of deceitfull ioyes shall seeme to challenge his iudgement in the first it will bee safe for him to credit his experience at the last and not venture on so slender a bridge ouer an horrible abysse Immoderate laughter stirred vp by outward aspects occasions compared with Christian sobrietie which should terminate our behauiour is more then reputed madnesse and such ioy makes vs seeme to do we know not what As well might Sampson haue ioyed in the crueltie of the Philistines when they put out his eyes c. Iudg. 16. as we in those transitories which by the fixing of our hearts vpon them obcecate our vnderstanding and so become the breeders of our confusion and Saul as wel when he tooke his sword in his hand wherewith he slew himselfe we take hold of vanitie and falshood a refuge which pierce the soule with anxious cares and wound it to the second death and what is it for vs to triumph in these things Christ himselfe chose the hardest part a part full of asperitie and bitternesse as it is noted from the euidence of his manifold pouertie and the absence of all terrene pleasures in his conuersation in his death and by that meanes entred into his glorie whose whole life was to vs disciplina morum that wee should imitate him in moralitie Moses conceiued no matter of reioycing in the pleasures of sinne therefore accepted rather to suffer affliction with the godly and many Saints wandred vp and downe in Sheepe skinnes and in Goates skinnes Egentes angustati afflicti destitute bestreighted afflicted Heb. 11.37 And all these through faith obtained good report ver 39. But the Princes of Israel then waxed carelesse of requisite vertues then forgate to sorrow for the afflictions of their brethren and then loathed the patience of godly aduersitie when they betooke themselues to ease to fare daintily to the drinking of Wine to Musicke and singing Amos 6. So when we are wrapt in this supputed heauen which wee are seldome out of we say of laughter thou art grace and of ioy thou art the sweetest solace looking to the soules health through these pleasures as at a remote obiect through a prospectiue glasse which makes it to bee thought neere being in truth far off whilst wee mistake these grosse and vanishing mists to be pellucidum Coelum as if we were then in Abrahams bosome when we are in Satans bondage Belshazzar and his noble associates when they were in carousing of wine praised their gods of Siluer and Gold c. supposing there was some vertue in them to do them good but what saw Belshazzar Found he not a God aboue all his gods that did annihilate their power and frustrate his owne expectation He saw an apparition and was it not a little one It was but a hand but it was sent frō heauen and was it not a mightie one His heart was hautie and his limbs lustie yet could hee not behold it without the fainting of the one and the feeblenesse of the other before he knew the true meaning of it his countenance was changed and his thoughts troubled him a sad presage of a fearefull consequence he dishonoured his Creator and did glorie in the Creature therfore was hee degraded from his honour deposed from his kingdome and depriued of his life for he was to light As it cannot be saith Chrysostome that fire should flame in Water so neither can the heart labour of compunction for sinne when it is taken vp and made insensible with pleasure for these are repugnant one to the other Illa enim mater est fletus haec mater est risus illa cor constringit ista dissoluit Because that is the mother of lamentation this of lightnesse that composeth and settles the heart this dissolues and disorders it It makes vs laud the gods of our delights as if they were powerfull to deliuer vs and contemne the Authour and finisher of our faith as if the Storie of his mercie power and passion were but a fable In quaffing we extoll Bacchus take him for our high Priest and pay him tenth vpon our knees Alij stantes discumbentes alij omnes ex animo which way soeuer all do it with all their hearts in banquetting to Epicurus in Musicke to Apollo wee sweare all allegiance hauing no more stay of our affections nor soundnesse of fidelitie then to become seruants vnto al that wil serue vs but with a fit of slippery content The finger of the Holy Ghost hath written our iudgement wee haue read it we haue heard it but are no whit changed nor abashed Christ hath spoken as it were from heauen to euery one of vs with that voice that came to Saul Why deest thou persecute me But we neither tremble nor aske what wilt thou Lord that we shall doe Wee are more brasen then timorous Belshazzar more impudent then trembling Foelix more obdurate then halfe perswaded Agrippa whom no inuectiues against sinne no lift vp voyce of any Cryer on earth no iudgements exemplified from aboue no terrors conceiued from beneath can truly conuert to true Christianitie When I saw saith Iehouah how that by all occasions rebellious Israel had plaied the harlot I cast her away and gaue her a bill of diuorcement yet her rebellious Sister Iudah was not afraid but shee went also and played the harlot Ier. 3.8 After both their backslidings in fearful rebellion and the manifestation of Gods indignation towards them we also a litle Sister vnto them Can. 8.8 come on carelesse fearelesse and commit fornicatiō with our pleasures It is recorded by Plutarch of Iulius Caesar that for his singular sobriety and temperance hee was the onely mirrour of Italy who by ouercomming himselfe ouercame all Europe A
to put off an iniury by holding ones peace then get the vpper hand by wrangling and contention 23 Since the Phisitiā knowes better what is good for the patient then himselfe doth I will not doubt of Gods mercy though I doe not alwayes receiue what I pray for for being he knowes my imbecilitie such as asketh often amisse and what would be hurtful he is no lesse mercifull in not hearing at some times then in giuing at other 24 It is a great inconuenience in that which the world cals good fellowship not to see what sufficeth whereby it either amitteth the name of good or else such as vse it account nothing their good that is not euill I will leaue with too little rather then with too much lest I seeme to allow Satan for an Angel of light and the Prodigals wandering the path-way to heauen 25 Warre is not vniustly preferred to a miserable peace Then seeing carnall tranquillitie is a very spirituall misery I will change it at all times for a godly aduersity for the goodnesse of a thing depending on the ende though I taste the roote bitter I shall receiue a full compensation in the sweetnesse of the fruite which is heere but green and ripenesse in heauen 26 It is bad talking with a madman not so much for that his heart is depraued but because his braine is distempered and his reason for the time peruerted It is worse arguing with a foole for though he hath a reasonable memory he is madde in the heart he denyeth God and therefore wil beleeue no truth he may be held vp as one in a swoune by force but cannot stand of himselfe I will not spende my strength in lifting at a logge hauing a more necessary building to follow lest getting a bruise by the former I proceede with lesse profite in the latter 27 Hee that would bee what he desires must desire to be what he should the wisest to disemble hath the best meanes to liue according to this world but he that beares true loue in an innocent heart is onely wise to eternall life by how much sweeter the ioy of Angels will be at my conuersion then the shreiking of hellish furies at my confusion by how much it is better to haue the testimonie of Gods Spirit then of man and to bee found in Christ then hanging at the breasts of the world I will esteeme an honest godly life before deceitfull pernicious hypocrisie 28 For euery ioy the worldling hath I will choose to receiue a stripe at Gods hands and yet liue more contentedly then he for how can those ioyes content him wherewith hee is neuer filled but still hungreth and hunteth after more Or how can I bee discontented that vnable of my selfe to purchase the least grace haue this meanes allowed to cause vnto me a most excellent and eternall weight of glory 29 Of the wicked some heare Gods word willingly as Herod heard Iohn Baptist other tremble in their hearing as Felix when hee heard Paul but neither was of grace the first being occasioned by the fame of the person the second enforced by the efficacy of the Scriptures Some vtterly refuse to meddle with religion as Gallio others sleepe in the Assembly and heare nothing as Eutichus others heare and profite nothing as the rich man by hearing of Christ They differ in shew they are one in effect I were as good to be vnwilling to heare as heare and not practise as good haue mine eyes shut as mine eares heauy and my heart fat I am each wayes the deuils subiect and by trembling at iudgement if not thirsting for mercy I am made his fellow there is neuer a good the head the hand and the foot cry out together they are all damned 30 By the principles of natural Philisophy the abūdance of hony is chiefly ingendered in such regions where the heat of Summer is temperate and continuall as well by night as by day and by experience that heart most commonly nourisheth spirituall motions and sweete contemplation that is of a mild and temperate disposition not subiect to extreame passion or not often inflamed therewith for when passion ariseth like an angry storme it tosseth and troubles the mind that during the agitation therof it cannot admit the setling of any calme or comfortable apprehension 31 Some I haue knowne obserue their friends for a time more then God that hauing reaped a wished haruest of profite by them they might after resolue to a strict and religious course of life whereto a meane estate and a troubled minde would not before admit them Gehazi was cleane before such corruption made him loathsome Zaccheus hauing offered away halfe his goods and dissolued his league with the world was knit to Christ in loue and familiaritie that was before a stranger and as I haue read the Loadstone and the Iron will not meete so long as the Diamond lyeth neere It is impossible for our hardened hearts to yeeld vnto God or bee drawne by his word whilest the loue of riches sticketh in them If I cannot resolue well being poore I shall not persist in a good resolution beeing rich If in a cleere day I cannot discern colours lesse should I in a mist not at all if I were blinde I will first seeke God and then no farther If I want I know it is my good for whilest he is my shepheard I shall want no manner of thing that is good for me Rather had I susteine pouerty for my good then haue abundance to annoy me 32 It is not the meere leauing of all which seldome happeneth without griefe but the contemning of all things which is a voluntary forsaking of what wee haue euen whilest we enioy it for the loue of Christ that fitly prepares vs to runne the race of Christianity Many for lacke of this preparatiue cannot runne at all others runne but faint by the way and returne with shame and losse of victorie as Demas Before I run I will consider who hath runne before mee what I runne for and whom I shall encounter by the way Christ led the way I shall follow him therefore I will be resolute The prize is a crowne of righteousnes which he holdeth in his hand ready to set vpon my head when I shall haue ouercome therefore remembring what I haue purposely contemned and that I haue denied my selfe neither life nor death things present nor things to come nor prncipalities nor powers shall set such a fainting period to my race but that I will holde it out for this cause I will run naked and stript of all by preferring Christ before all that hee may assist mee with his grace in all because knowing who and what my assailants are how full of subtilty and rage they may not lay hold on me to my hinderance 33 The naturall man in regard of accelerating death can say that griefe is light to him that can beare it howsoeuer it is short to him that cannot beare it But the