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A93092 The committee-man curried. A comedy presented to the view of all men. / Written by S. Sheppard. A piece discovering the corruption of committee-men, and excise-men; the unjust sufferings of the royall party, the divellish hypocrisie of some round-heads, the revolt for gaine of some ministers. Not without pleasant mirth, and variety.; Committee-man curried. Part 1 Sheppard, S. (Samuel) 1647 (1647) Wing S3160; Thomason E398_21; ESTC R201697 8,155 15

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him if you love me Suckdrie le ts stiffe him and say it was a sudden judgement upon him for his obstinacy the posture will confirme it Suck You must drink sir Time hold sir I le drink he drinks Suck So so so Rebel This is good sack gentlemen I le spend my pint so please you Suck I le gi' thee a quart my Bullie to morrow I le be thrifty and share the Commons coine with frugall skill Nay Master Time-server sit not so farre of each man joyne foot to foot and tipple in an Orbe Some wine boy Draw I come I come Sir brings wine Com. Here Master Time-Server you are too Stoicall a draught of this will give you the Anallysis of your text without mediums or nocturnall watchings here he drinks Time-Ser This is inticing liquor drinks Suck Mr. Rebellion this blood of the ripe grape will adde unto your numerous pious thoughts in this bowle full to the brimme I memorize your health Rebel I thank you sir and by my fathers head this sack is very warme and comfortable give me measure sir drinks Time-Ser I now begin to be strangely transported gentlemen shall s be merry for troth to say 't is that I most effect how ere I counterfeit to please the rising Round-heads when as the Bishops rul'd I was for them I wore my Cassock most canonicall but now the tide is turnd 't were simple policy to swim against the streame to be so nice of conscience for making scruple to revile my Prince to cherish and confirme base men in hope of that nere was nor is nor ere shall be to loose vast summes of gold thanksgiving dinners and repute Rebel Drink deepe my fingers itch untill they seize the bowle I laugh to think how when I counterfeit a whining passion and talke of God and goodnesse walke with a sad and mortified countenance how I 'me admir'd amongst the Brethren and stild a man of God Suck Excellent here 's to thee for that conceit we foure should have made rare States-men we are so wittie in our mischief Master Time-Server You have occupied with the nine girles lets heare le ts heare Time-Server sings A health to the nut brown Lasse With the hazell eyes let it passe She that has good eyes Has good thighes Let it passe Let it passe As much to the lively gray T is as good i th night as the day She that has good eyes Has good thighes Drink away Drink away I pledge I pledge what be some wine Here 's to thine and to thine The colours are divine But O the black the black Give me as much again and let be sack She that has good eyes Has good thighes And it may be a better knack Suck A reckoning boy call thy Master Enter Master Master Your will gentlemen Suck Our will sir is to pay gentlemen deposite they pay dost heare here 's a friend of ours has forgotten himself Com. Cur. a little as they call it the wine has got a sleepe into his head as frost into a hand he is benum'd and has no use of himselfe for present Exeunt Mast You 'd need gentlemen be all wafted home in a Sedan you are so light you hardly feele your selves and yet so weighty that you reele under your burdens thus must we thrive by sinne it must be so this is the last of ages Nor can posterity new vices frame Our children will but wish and act the same Exit ACT. 4. The curtaine pinn'd up Enter HORNE a Citizen as in his Shop Horn. What d ee lack Gentlemen pray what d ee lack Enter Light-heeles his wife Light Sweet-heart where have you dispos'd the velvet slippers the Shoe-maker brought home last night Horn. They are in the matted-chamber close by the role of 〈◊〉 Enter Suck-dry Suck Mr. Horne I joy to see you healthy and in so faire a way to thrive Mr. Horne my humblest service I shall make bold Sir to spend an houre or two with your faire wise Horn. With all my heart Sir Iames. Shew worshipfull Mr. Suck-dry into the painted chamber Sir ther 's a quilt of worth in 't Sweet-heart be not too nice refuse not to bee open to him thou know'st hes bountifull Light I shall observe your charge Sir Exeunt Sceane 2. Enter againe Suck-dry Light-heeles Suck I 'le lock the door Sweet Locks the door So Now we are alone no envious eyes can gaze upon our actions Dearest Mistris hast thou not wanted my societie the tedious tearme of three whole dayes Light No Sir Love will subsist a while with ruminating of those joyes have bin aswell as those that are to come Suck Looke here my Mistresse since I saw you I have invokt Apollo and the Nine to ayde my quill in some apt meeter for to sing thy praise Light Verses are they your owne Sir I doe not thinke but you Poets that can so manifest your loves in blanke verse not leave or god or goddesse in spacious heaven but call them downe for witnesses if you were mounted on a cowle-staffe and toss'd some-thing high you would imagine you backt Pegasus Or if you were plac't knee-deepe in a great tub of water you dabling there would count it Helicon Suck Your wit 's too sharpe Sweet Mistresse you talke like a second Sapho heare my Minerva speake Light Willingly Sir Hee reades his verses Bright starre ot'h lower orbe twinckling inviter Which draw'st aswell as eyes but sett'st men righter For who at thee begins comes to the place Sooner then hee that sets out at the face Eyes are seducing Lights that the good women know And hang out these a nearer way to show How like you these Light Troth Sir the sense ot'h lines puzzels my capacitie I want your meaning Sir Suck I will unfold my selfe when I told thee Let us turne day to night Too much fruition bates my appetite For who so amourous but his Love he may Abhorre and justly too seven times a day Exeunt ACT. 5. Enter DAMMEE a Ruffian Dam. This day I 'le sacrifice to Venus Mars shall claime the next the third I 'le consecrate to Iupiter the fourth I 'le be a wit and Mercury shall be my Clearke Thus will I drive my dayes to weekes my weekes to months my months to yeares and lavish out my life in lust in wounds in arts I 'le make the milke-sops of this age for to doe homage to my shadow Stay this is Horns house and his faire wife I now must give a visite there is feaver in my bloud I shall dissolve with heat unlesse a cooler knocks Enter Horne Horn. Mr. Dammee your radiant sublimitie doth illustrate this habitation please you Sir draw neere my poore mansion my selfe and all are in 't at your disposall Dam. Thou dost but doe me justice my merrits doe deserve thy low submission Where is thy wife Horn. Sir she 's a little busie the time will not be long ere she 'l wait on you Dam. I 'le wait on her Dammee I l'e see who t is that now imployes her I thinke my gifts have been as large and liberall as any that survives Horn. Sir I confesse your bountie you 'l further yet oblige my gratitude if you but please to take a turne i' th garden till she comes downe Dam. I 'le cut thee into attomes if thou prescribe my will Wher 's this creature rushes in Dam. What are you pounded within Horn. Within You will undoe me Sir A noyse of the breaking of a doore Sceane 2. Enter Dammee with a Battoone in his hand driving before him naked Suck-dry and Light-heele Light For heavens sake hold Sir Suck Oh oh the splinters of my bones start out and peirce holes in my skin Dam. Slave I 'le beat thy braines out at thy nose Suck O hold Sir I am one of the Committee Dam. Nay then thou shalt not live if I kill thee the fact will ne'r be odious in the sight of heaven the Commons prayers will expiate my crimes How many men have been undone by thee thou art insatiate as death and hell Shortly then Procula Bradshaw had a Bed Six little pitchers crown'd his cupboards-head And under it there lay a two-eared pot With Gerards Herball Item he had got A chest with some Greeke Authors where the fierce And barbarous mice gnaw'd never-dying verse That Bradshaw was worth nothing who but knowes Yet he poore wretch did all that nothing lose By such as thee O yee are moths of State The other rob within doore you at gate Suck O fatall day lust hath betray'd me unto death Dam. There lye and groane thy soule out Light Sir I repent that ere I entertain'd you and wer 't not that I hate my husbands basenesse I would repent and be an honest woman You not content for to enjoy his wife but to abuse his house If that he can with all these wrongs sit downe In time he 'l let you shave and crack his crowne And take a good sound whipping in the end Worthy of such a wife and such a friend Exeunt FINIS