loved me That that I admire most is that Iesus Christ should dye for such a one e Rom. 5 6-8 9. Then being sensible of her bodily ilnesse having kept her bed since April 6. Shee said I am sore from the crown of the head to the foot but t is nothing t is nothing When Iesus Christ was in the world he cured bodies and not bodies onely but soules too Then turning her selfe in the bed shee said Now I have my desire I desired nothing but a crucified Christ and I have him I desired nothing but a crucified Christ and I have him a crucified Christ a naked Christ I have him and nothing els I am sore all over I can neither heare nor see I desired him so and I have him so and I have nothing els And said Wee should be as well content to beare he crosse of Christ as the crown f Gal. 6. 14. Act. 2â— 24. For he was made perfect by suffering g Heb. 2. 10. and he had no sin it was for us Therefore wee should be contented to beare the Crosse h 1 Pet. 2. 21 22. Hah Had I known this I would not have been in such a condition as I was meaning it seems in murmuring and not waiting patiently the Lords time But Gods time is the best time to reveale himselfe and to open mine eyes to see and mine ears to hear and he gives power to wait Was I afraid to name the Devill Nothing but free Grace makes the difference between me and the Devill All 's free mercy free and goodnesse free and love free The Lord proclaimed his own Name he cald himselfe Gracious Mercifull Long-suffering i Exod. 34. 6. Ah how sick am I at the heart what a stitch I have Soon after shee said I thank you for giving me the water Iesus Christ hath given you water He hath given you and he will give you more Shee said also God hath two thrones one is in the highest Heavens the other is in the lowest hearts He dwels as truly in the lowest hearts as in the highest Heavens in the poorest contemptible heart k Isa. 66. 2. When Solomon built a Temple he said The Heavens of Heavens cannot contein thee and how shall this house that I have built l 1 King 8. 27. But God builds a house for himselfe to dwell in and he dwels in it for ever for ever for ever Doe not you know that God hath two Thrones The highest Heavens and the lowest hearts Happy is that people that is in such a case whose God is the Lord whose joy is their strength m Psal. 144. 15. And so saying shee smiled her eyes being still fast closed So shee lay still and was not heard to speake any more from that Tuesday till Thursday following Thursday April 15. 1647. This day about 7 of the clock in the morning shee began thus Daniel in the Lyons den the three children in the siery farnace n Dan. 6. end Dan. 3.26 28. the Lord delivered them and so he doth me Then calling for water to drink shee said again as formerly Christ hath given you water to drink freely give me water freely so shee drank three or foure times her little cup full of water And shee still remaining deaf and with her eyes fast closed up shee said Have not I a Mother some where I pray you pray her to pardon me the murmurings against her For nothing els troubles me God hath pardoned Hath the Creator pardoned and shall not the Creature Thus speaking the teares ran fast down her checks for a great while and shee said When the prodigall came home his earthly father pardon'd him o Luk. 15. 20. 32. and his heavenly Father pardon'd him And will not my Mother pardon me If shee should it s not that will doe me good If shee will not it lyes heavy upon me But God hath pardon'd mee Another time when many were present shee said thus with teares trickling down If any did know what it is to murmure against a God and against a Parent and felt for it what I have felt they would never doe it Nothing more burdens me then my murmurings and disobedience against my Mother This shee spake weeping What a warning is this to all children that have murmured or been disobedient against father or mother to repent in time and seek pardon and mercy for helpe against it least it be as heavy a burthen to them when they are in trouble as it hath been to this hand-maid and to divers others Yet she said her disobedience was not wilfull but shee was hurried to it in the violence of temptation Then shee desired her mother might come to her to testifie that she had pardon'd her yet could shee then neither heare nor see but said I know a Iacob from an Esau. Her mother came to her and took her daughters hand and put it to her own neck where her daughter felt a skare that was there through the enemy whereby her daughter knowing her cast her head into her mothers bosome and wept greatly and kissed her and stroaked her face and said I know you mother and I love you with another love then I loved you before Then shee asked for water to wash her EYES desiring she might now see her Mother also and that shee might heare her mother speak and tell her that shee had pardon'd her disobedience And water being brought her eyes were wash'd and they being still fast folded up M ris Dupper her neighbour in Lawrence Pountney-lane held open her eyes and shee saw and knew her mother and then immediately her EARES also were opened that shee might heare her mother speake to her and shee testified to her that shee had pardon'd her and lov'd her as her own soule And then her heart was at rest shee was satisfied Her bearing then continued about halfe an houre viz. till shee ceased then to speake and then it was againe taken from her and her eyes were presently closed up again In this time of her hearing her mother told her that her Brother was come viz. M r Ionathan Vaughan her mothers son by her former husband Who being then a Student of Alsoules Colledge in Oxford having remained there severall yeares was now come to London to see his Mother and Sister and other friends and was to return thither again shortly From thence he had lately writ a Consolatory Letter to his Sister expressing his confidence that Iesus Christ the Lyon of the Tribe of Iudah both could and would deliver her c. Of which her Mother also was perswaded and waited for by which the Lord the more enabled her to bear this sad affliction that bad so long continued Shee was glad to hear of her Brother that had mourned and pray'd for her that he was now come at such a time and shee desired to see and hear him But at that time he was abroad And before he came shee had
day of her so trembling being Tuesday April 6. When the maid beforesaid came to her she found her weeping most bitterly wringing her hands grievously saying I am a Reprobate a Castaway I never had a good thought in all my life I have been under sinne ever since I can remember when I was but a childe c. This heavinesse was greatest this night was darkest of all when the day the joyfull time of her deliverance was neer at hand And like as at the beginning of her grievous despairing about foure yeares before upon those two sinnes beforesaid a great trembling fell upon her at the beginning of her deep despaire and trouble so now at the ending thereof the like trembling fell upon her such as shee never had at any other time And now thus trembling exceedingly and weeping and wringing her hands shee said to this effect My earthly Tabernacle is broken all to pieces and what will the Lord doe with me If I should hang on Gibbets if I should be cut in pieces if I should dye the cruellest death that ever any did I have deserv'd it I would still justifie God aye if he cast me to hell Thus it was with patient Iob He humbled himselfe and justified the Lord when his restoring was at hand Her hands and her feet were clunched so as shee could not stand Shee was tempted and sore urged to blaspheme God and dye And when shee was ready to speak her tongue was smitten Afterward shee being laid down shee said to her Mother I le lye still and hear what God will say to me He will speak Peace Peace If God will speak a word of Peace at the last moment I should be contented Then shee desired them that none might trouble her but that shee might lie in peace And shee lay still as in a sleep or as in a trance rather from that tuesday night April 6. till the last day of that week cald Saturday at night except when shee cald for a little water to drink and drunk two or three cups of water No other sustenance shee took all that time And this was the time of love when The Exceeding Riches of Grace was advanced April 10. 1647. that Saturday at night about midnight or after midnight shee began to expresse the first expressions of comforts of such soule-satisfying comforts that ever shee so manifested though her soule enjoyd them from that Tuesday night before as since her Trances ceas'd shee hath declared Even now when all mans help faild and when all meanes before used could not doe it and when now shee was made uncapable that way to receive it being now struck both blind and deafe her eyes being fast closed up wrapt up together A. Saul who is called Paul when the Lord converted him was three dayes without sight and neither did eat nor drinke Act. 9. 9. And thus shee began My soule thirsts for the water of life and I shall have it My soule thirsts for the water of life and I shall have it foure times in ardency of spirit uttering those words then adding a little water good people a little water So shee drank two or three of her little cups of water Then shee sate up and with a most sweet and heavenly countenance and with much brokennesse of heart in an humble melting manner Teares sometimes trickling downe shee spake with a low voice as followeth Ah that Iesus Christ should come from the bosome of his Father and take the nature of man upon him and come in such a low estate and lie in a Manger a Luk. 2. 7. There 's three sorts of people in the world a higher sort and a middle sort and a lower sort Christ came to the lowest soule he lay in a Manger a contemptible place Doe you not see an excellency in him b Phil. 3. 8. Do you not see an excellency in him I tell you there 's more excellency in him in his lowest state his meanest state then in the world aye then in a thousand worlds Who came he to dye for for sinners aye for the greatest sinners the chiefest sinners the chiefest sinners c 1 Tim. 1. 13-15 Luk. 18. 14. A dying Christ for a denying Peter a dying Christ for a denying Peter a dying Christ for a denying Peter Peter denied him and yet he dyed for him d Mat. 26. 72. Luk. 22. 31 32. Goe tell Peter Goe tell Peter e Mark 16. 7. Ah Peter And then shee paused a while as admiring it and proceeded thus For a Peter for a Mary Magdalen for a Theefe on the Crosse that none should despaire a crucified Christ for a crucified Theefe a crucified Christ for a crucified Theefe A persecuting Saul becomes a beloved Paul for the chiefest sinners the chiefest sinners Not the proud Pharisie but the poore Publican f Joh. 5. 40. No sin separates from Christ but the sin of Vnbeliefe And this is the Faith beleeving a full Christ to a nothing Creature a full Christ to a nothing Creatures a full Christ to a nothing Creature g Joh. 1. 16. 2 Cor. 12. 31. To me the chiefest of sinners yet I obtained mercy * Shee meant being then in unbeliefe through unbeliefe Christ came not to finde faith but to give faith Christ came in to me when I was in my unbeliefe Then shee said pausing There 's a fountaine open for Judah and for Jerusalem for sin and for uncleannesse A fountain open for Judah and for Jerusalem for sin and for uncleannesse h Zach. 13. 1. A fountaine not streames but a fountain open an open fountaine if a doore stand shelving you cannot come in but you must thrust to come in but if it stand wide open then there 's freedome for you to goe freedome for you to goe It s open * The house of David is of Iudah Mat. 1.1,2.6 for Judah Judah that play'd the Harlot yet God saith to Judah Returne though thou hast play'd the Harlot with many lovers returne for I am married to thee i Jer. 3. 1. 14. For Judah and for Jerusalem and what was Jerusalem her skirts were fu'l of bloud her streets were full of bloud k Jer. 2.34 2 King 21.16 Yet the fountain is open for Judah and for Jerusalem For sin and for uncleannesse for all sin for the greatest sinne the chiefest sinne and sinners Who is this fountaine Iesus Christ he is this fountain * Joh. 7.37 Rev. 1. 5. a filling fountaine and never dry l Luk. 1. 53. a filling fountaine and never dry a filling fountaine and never dry Who is a God like to thee pardoning sin m Mic. 7. 18. all sin sin past present and to come n Heb. 10. 10-14 not onely pardoning sin but passing by the transgression of his heritage Passing by daily sins and frailites he retains not his anger for ever He is slow to wrath bist he delights in mercy He is slow to nothing
they beleeved not and what great need they have of Christ and till then they never rightly beleeve I have found it hath been so with me No sin is like the sin of unbeliefe The enemy is the Grand enemy of the soul that sin is the Grand sin of the soul. Though it be the great sin of all and the damning sin That yet Iesus Christ should not onely bid such a one beleeve but give it to beleeve it is to be admired 2. Quest. Whether many are not worse by hearing the Gospel of Grace in Christ to the ungodly and chiefest of sinners S. Ans. Many are worse and many are better The y 1 Pet. 1. 25. Word by the Gospel is to be preached to the world of sinners that is the Word which became flesh z Joh. 1. 14. That Christ came not to be ministred unto but to minister and to give his life a ransom for many a Mar. 10 45. He is not to be ministred unto by workes of our righteousnesse or our preparing our selves first for him or any worthinesse in our selves but to minister that is to supply our wants first the Spirit and therewith righteousnesse peace and joy which make an empty soule full indeed and to give his life not so sell it to them that haue money but to give it to them that have none his life no lesse price a ransome for us bondslaves that were in bondage to Satan sin and corruption for many for a numberles number that none can number so they are indeed if all be gathered together though but a few in comparison of the rest for many are called but few are chosen b Mar. 20. 16. It s there for many here for few Many are called by the word to Beleeve and to Repent all where the Gospel comes but few are called out of their sinfull state Iune 10.47 It being now above 75. dayes since she did eat at all and full 65. dayes since shee did sip or drink two dayes together her drink being onely fair water for about twenty dayes and since that some small beer and both these onely at once still in two three or four dayes of late in four or five dayes once and then no more till about so long after shee having never been able to stirre out of bed since April 6. being 65. dayes through her great weaknesse especially in her head by her so beating it against walls in her Terror and now shee being very weak unlikely to live unlesse shee took somewhat except he who so miraculously had upheld her so long should hold out the same great power and goodnes still unto her shee not having taken so much as a sip of any thing at all for four or five dayes last nor so much as moistened her mouth or lips in all that time and had enjoyed very little rest for a week together or more The Relator perceiving it now as from time to time formerly spake to her about eating or drinking somewhat S. Ans. I am not hungry nor thirsty Rela I have sometime neglected my body till I saw I must not wrong the Temple of the Holy Ghost c 1 Cor. 3. 17. and then I durst not but eat though I had no mind to it because t is an ordinary means of preserving life and health S. Ans. I cannot do it I do not abstain out of wilfulnesse for I would if I could nor have I any command or temptation in my spirit against it as if I should not but it is because I cannot When I have tried I am the worse by it I cannot digest it and the smell of it hurts me The Relator durst not then further urge her and being ready to depart Shee entreated his visiting some of the despairing soules that had been with her and to pray for them and for her selfe that shee might quietly submit to the will of God to live or dye for she found not such contentednesse to live as she desired but rather longing to be dissolved to be with Christ which was best of al for her Phil. 1. 23. So lie left her more drooping weak and pensive then at any time shee now to the eye of man drawing neer to death as he apprehended and was much affected with it spake of it to some ☞ But yet remembring some expressions of Faith that she had uttered before touching the raising up of her body as well as her soule pag. 33. 35. he had hopes the Lord would yet raise up her body to the praise of his Name and the refreshing of others that are despairing disconsolate soules And now behold and see the LORDS doing for it is marvailous and worthy to be remembred That day and untill about ten of the Clock at night all that week before-going especially on since Tuesday beforesaid she had these words following her and still as it were spoken to her again again viz. With long life will I satisfie him Ps. 91. 16. At first she took it to be meant of Eternall life in glory and rejoyced in it But when it was opened to her to be also of long life here Shee thought that would not satisfie her and therefore she would not regard it being so desirous to be absent from the body and to be present with Jesus Christ. 2 Cor. 5.8 a little glimpse of him that shee felt was so sweet shee so desired the full fruition of him that shee was not so contented to live as was meet and as now having a sight of it shee desired prayer for her that shee might be and that she might quietly lie down at the feet of God to do with her as he would that shee might not be so weary of the condition the Lord allotted to her About ten at night this came in as if it had been whispered to her soule from God Thou hast not wearied me with thy sacrifices but thou hast wearied me with thy sins Yet I even I am he that blotteth out thy transgressions for mine owne Names sake a Isa. 43.22.25 and will remember them no more for ever no not for ever Thou art mine my b Cant. 7. 10. desire is towards thee I will c Hos. 14. 4. heal thy backslidings I love thee freely I forgive all thy sins for my Names sake as though they had never been committed Come and see how I have loved thee How I have ever loved thee Behold and admire this love of mine Fathom this sea of my love if thee canst which drownes the multitude of thy sins and see how I have ever loved thee from eternity with an endlesse boundlesse and everlasting d Jer. 31 3 love the number of thy sins and multitude of thy transgressions against me shall never be able to seperate the e Ro. 8 35-39 union that I have made between thee me This manifestation exceedingly melted her heart and the more abased her soule before him And shee said Lord
The exceeding Riches of GRACE ADVANCED By the Spirit of Grace in an Empty Nothing Creature viz. M ris SARAH WIGHT Lately hopeles and restles her soule dwelling far from Peace or hopes thereof Now hopefull and joyfull in the LORD that hath caused LIGHT to shine out of DARKNES that in and by this Earthen Vessel holds forth his Own eternall Love and the Glorious Grace of Iesus Christ to the CHIEFEST of SINNERS Who desired that others might hear and know what the LORD had done for her soul that was so terrified day and night and might neither PRESUME nor DESPAIR and murmure against God as shee hath done Published for the Refreshing of poor souls by an Eye and Ear-witnes of a good part thereof HENRY JESSE a servant of IESUS CHRIST The second Edition corrected and Proofs added LONDON Printed by Matthew Simmons for Henry Overton and Hannah Allen and are to be sold at their Shops in Popes-head Alley 1647. TO HIS CHRISTIAN FRIENDS Beloved in the LORD in London Cambridge Yorkshire Suffolk Essex and elswhere The Exceeding Riches of Grace be advanced My Beloved MY Spirit rejoyceth in the Lord who hath put such an opportunitie as this into my hand of Publishing to you and to others and hereby of Advancing The Exceeding Riches of the Grace of God in such a Pattern thereof as here followeth The Daughter of a gracious Matrone of mine acquaintance in the Parish where I weekly Preach in London who was in as hopeles and desperate a condition in her selfe as ever was any Now often admiring and uttering to others especially to afflicted despairing mournfull soules that resort now to her the unsearchable Treasures of Grace to the ungodly and chiefest of lost undone sinners The main Causes urging me to Publish it to you and the Contents thereof are in the Books beginning The severall Vses are in the End You know that the works of Iehovah are great honorable wonderfull and glorious and are greatly to be magnified sought out of all them that have pleasure therein He makes them to be remembered Ps. 111. 2 3 4. Especially his works of * Psal. 145. 9. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 tender-Mercies which are over and * Psal. 145. 9. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 upon all his works How desireable is it to one and to the friends of one that is in great extremity of misery bodily or spirituall to hear of another that was just in the same condition that now is cured How much longed for is a safe Harbour to a weather-beaten Ship tossed with Tempests Isa. 54. 11. How refreshful is rest and ease to a tempted hurried wearied soule Iob 7 2-4 How joyfull and beautifull is the a Rom. 10. 15. glad tydings of the Gospel of Peace of riches of Grace of the perfect b 2 Cor. 5. 21. righteousnesse of Christ for the c 1 Tim. 1 13-15 chiefe of sinners d Eph. 2.15.16.3 enemies murmurers ungodly ones to souls wearied out in looking on themselves and their sins and desperate wickednesse of their own hearts and that gladly would mend all and patch up a righteousnesse in themselves or partly there Rom. 10.3 that would first finde a thorough change in them such a dying of sin and holy walking before they think they may beleeve that Christ dyed for such as they Rom. 5. 7 8. 10. or justifies such ungodly f Rom. 4.5 ones How mighty through g 2 Cor. 10. 4 God may it be to support poor soules that are perswaded they are reprobates h Lam. 3 8-17-22.40 that are assured of it upon certain grounds as they judge and that they are damn'd i Io. 3.17.22 and in Hell already that never any in their case was or can be saved k 1 Cor. 6 9-11 that the sins of Manasses of David of Peter of Paul of Mary Magdalen yea and of Cain Iudas and Pilate are all lesse then their sins blasphemies and if all they might be saved yet themselves should surely be damn'd for such to hear of one that but lately was in the very same condition now sounding forth and wondring at the Exceeding Riches of Grace to her the chiefest of sinners Psal. 35.10 to hear her selfe telling such despairing soules You cannot be more desperate or more certain of hell and wrath then I lately was and comforting them by the same consolations wherewith her own soul is now comforted in the Lord. 2 Cor. 1.4 This all this you have here held forth in this Pattern of Gods patience and abundant goodness towards this his unworthy Handmaid whose low base estate he hath regarded He causing LIGHT to shine out of DARKNES 2 Cor. 4.6 The writing transcribing and often perusing hereof hath been and is sweet and precious to me I must confesse I with your reading it may be so and much more to your soules As you reade Consider Admire the LORD in his surpassing Grace to ungodly ones Mic. 7.18 Do not so commend the party that is but an Earthen vessel born in sin a Psal. 51.5 as you b Eph. 2 1-3 are but still all along exalt and commend the LORD who alone is to be exalted Isa. 2.11 1 Cor. 1.29 30 31. Who puts his treasure into an Earthen vessel of purpose that the excellency of the power may be of God and not of flesh 2 Cor. 4. 7. Be the more vile in your own eyes when you see God is pacified towards you for all that you have done Ezek. 16. 63. And from beleeving his love to your soules in love study what you should render to him in Christs Name Psal. 116.12 Col. 3.17 Praise the Lord for leaving such Patterns of his Riches of Grace as that of M ris Drake Revived and that of Gods gracious thoughts towards great sinners by D r Homes in a late Book so called so especially this And Pray for her if the Lord shall restore her body which as yet is weak to eat at all or to drink but very little of faire water or small Beere and that onely at once in two or three or foure dayes and by her daily spending that small strength shee hath by often uttering forth the treasures of Grace and by oft speaking to comfort despairing soules seven or moe whereof have resorted to her that shee may walke humbly rendring againe in her measure according to the benefit done unto her Since the former was fitted for the Presse shee then not being likely to live unlesse the Lord should work a Miracle He raised her wonderfully by faith in his Sonne without any meanes when shee could use none and that by two degrees First to EATE and to ARISE Iun. 11. 1647. Then on Midsummer day to WALK as both follow neer the end of the Book Pag. 133. to 143. And Pray for despairing soules here now being many of them and for the more exalting of Jesus Christ in the powring out of his Spirit upon his sonnes and daughters
will bring down every high thing and he alone will be exalted in the Earth When great voices shall say THE KINGDOMES OF THIS WORLD ARE BECOME OUR LORDS AND HIS CHRISTS AND HE SHALL REIGNE TO THE AGES OF AGES Rev. 11. 13-15 Even so Come Lord Jesus Amen The joy hereof frequently refresheth with the refreshings of God London †Postscript Moonths according to Holy Scriptures begin at New Moons Phasis or first appearing time Num. 10. 10 Num. 28. 11. Greek Psal. 81. 3. Heb. cal'd Moonths from Moons Thus in this yeare 1648. the first Moonth Nisan Ester 3.7 begins March 14. vulgar 2 d Moonth Ziu 1 King 6. 1. begins April 13 th 3 d Moonth Sivan Ester 8. 2. began May 12. c. The rest with their significations c. being published in the Scripture-Almanack the Relator thinking to make use of with the Vulgar Kalendar in the ensuing Relation was led as yet to forbear it till thereby people be furthered to understand the Scripture Language therein least he might seem to many Readers a Barbarian 1 Cor. 14. 9. 11. 2 d Moonth Ziu 2 d day Vulg. April 27. Revised AEthanim 3. Vulg. Septemb. 21. 1647. Your fellow-servant and Brother having holding the witnes of Iesus HENRIE JESSE aliàs HENRIE JACIE MAy 24. 1647. M ris SARAH WIGHT being then still very weak in body and keeping bed since April 6. said thus to the Relator I would others might heare how graciously the Lord hath dealt with me the chiefest of sinners that none might DESPAIR and murmure as I have done Though I murmured as they in the Wildernes as much as those that sell yet he hath brought me into the land of Canaan and hath brought Legion to her right mind and set her at his feet I was strongly perswaded that what I did eat or drink it was as the unworthy eating the Sacrament I stil did cat and drink my own damnation every thing I did or saw was terror to me So it remained and might have remain'd for ever had not his loving kindnes prevented me and drawn me to himselfe O that all creatures reasonable and unreasonable might praise the Name of the Lord ‑ And I would others might heare of this that none might PRESUME For if they knew the terrors that I have felt the terrors of Hell for sinning against light against God and against a Parent for murmuring lying revolting judging I had committed that impardonable sin if they knew what it is to have God hide his face and be as an enemy they would not presume To the Christian Reader GRACE and PEACE MAny of these precious Pearles these hidden Mysteries of the Treasury of the glorious Gospel being gathered and stored up together by the Relator as they were brought to light day by day before the 27 th of April last Divers Christian friends that had been partakers thereof judged it unmeet they should be hid and hoarded up for a few to enjoy in private much desiring they might be published both for better supply to themselves and to many others whom the Lord might please to support refresh and enrich thereby When no more was gathered then what might be contained in two sheets or three The Earthly Vessell of conveyance being then most likely to return to earth within a few dayes Hence was the more cause of willingnesse to yeild to this desire and to prefix the Letter foregoing for the better confirmation hereof writ April 27. 1647. After that day shee remaining as weak as before and unable to eat at all for eleven weeks together or to drink but onely once in two or three or once in foure or five dayes and still drinking lesse and lesse then that before Pag. 55 56. and her drink being onely faire water till April 19. and sometimes small beer afterwards never strong beer Thus was this put to the Presse and in the mean while one day after another was occasion of enlarging it by Conferences c. and of her still drawing neerer death in outward appearance till Iune 11. And before Iune 11. and Iune 25. 1647. which were the dayes of the Lords wonderfull raising up her body by Faith as is shewed pag. 135. a good part thereof was printed Yet seeing the more goodnesse the Lord magnified towards her the chiefest of sinners the more his love therein melts and abaseth her as Pag. 119. 125. 134. the LORD so abase her still Its hoped the LORD will keep her soule in that humble frame whereby the publishing hereof which may be for great refreshing to many sad troubled disconsolate soules and to others who through God may reap abundant fruit hereby may be no hurt to her nor any cause at all of repenting to the Relator or others but of rejoycing and thankesgiving to many which is the longing desire and humble request of Him that longeth to be made more conformable to the death of Christ London scrip stil. 4. Mon. 23. day Vulg. Iuly 16. 1647. to dye to himselfe and to live to God and to walk in and be led by the Spirit H. J. A Postscript to the Reader For better satisfying some that would know many particulars distinctly or els they will not beleeve what wonders are here mentioned Here is added touching this hand-maids Parents Her Father was M r Thomas Wight pag. 5. son to M r Wight of Daintree and Brother to M r Nat. Wight Preacher in Tewksbury Her Mother M ris Mary Wight above seven yeeres agoe was also in deep terror and distraction of Spirit then living neer London-stone till the Lords good time of refreshing came The Maid that tended on her hereafter mentioned known to M r Cradock of Wales is well known to many of his London acquaintance Her name is Hannah Guy daughter to M r Eli-Iabu Guy late of Ireland of Trayleigh in Munster Province whose Father went thither to avoyd the Ceremonies here urged The Testimony of these two the Mother and this Maid of her drinking so little not eating at all for so long from March 27. till Iune 11. pag. 55. c. both these being of approved faithfulnesse may be sufficient 2 Cor. 13. 1. Of the expressions from pag. 35. to the end of the Book the Relator was with them an eare-witnes generally A great part of nine leaves was taken by him from the Relation of them or one of them being writ as they spake Verbatim viz. from pag. 16. to pag. 35. Some of the Repetitions therein especially of two Names being taken with the rest so passed to the Presse with the rest which now the Relator likes not wishing they had been forborne Thou art entreated therefore to excuse it and what other failings are or appeare to be Remembring In many things wee all * Greek slip Jam. 3. 2. Gal. 6. 1 2. Amongst others that have been with this Handmaid were these of esteeme amongst many that feare the Lord in London viz. M r Prime of Cambridge now Minister
in Lawrence Pountney lately of Black Fryers M r Cradock Minister in Nicholas lane M r Barker Minister at Garlick-hill M r Brag from about Bristol M r Isaac Knight late of Holland Captain Harrison The Lady Mayerne and M ris Iane Done her sister Lady Hartop with M ris Fant her sister now M ris Stock and M r Ric-Wollaston M ris Rolls wife to Judge Rolls M ris Mary Leeb Hanna Trapnel Dinah the Blackmore and those that are named pag. 8. 9 10. and many others The Reason of naming many is there rendred viz. that some more incredulous might the sooner beleeve and reap benefit and not reject the mysteries of God against themselves to their hurt Luk. 7.30 Which may plead excuse for naming them Ioh. 4. 39. For the saying of the Woman many of the Samaritans beleeved on Iesus Joh. 12. 11. Joh. 11. 45. By reason of Lazarus being so raised up many beleeved on Iesus Act. 9. 42. By making knows his raising up of Dorcas many beleeved on the Lord. If some yet say How is it possible that one so young and never understanding to purpose till now should be able so to speak T is answered This is the Lords work and it is marvellous in our eyes who out of the mouth of babes and sucklings hath ordained strength perfected praise Mat. 21. 16. And hath promised to his to powre out of his Spirit in the last dayes upon them and upon their children their sons and daughters Act. 2. 17. 33. 38 39. Our Lord Jesus promised to his Disciples that his Holy Spirit should bring to their remembrance what he had said to them Joh. 14. 26. This good Spirit brought to her remembrance now when it was most usefull what shee had read and heard formerly and opened her heart to understand them and opened her mouth to utter them in an humble melting manner as he had opened to her even when her bodily eyes and ears were held which since April 19. are both of them opened H. I. M r Saltmarsh his Letter For my dear and honored Friend and Cosen M H. JACIE Dear Cosen I Salute you in the Lord. I did much rejoyce in those breathings of the Spirit of God which I found in your little Book OF THE RICHES OF GRACE ADVANCED c. Surely the Lord is teaching his people and fulfilling his promises They shall be all taught of God Joh. 6. 45. And thus his New Covenant with his people shall be more and more revealed and the Lord alone shall be exalted in that day Isa. 2.11 When I meet with such precious manifestations of the Lord me thinkes I taste those waters of life those rivers of living water which shall show out of the bellies of those who beleeve in Christ Joh. 7. 38. There is not a streame of this water but it proceeds from the Throne of Grace Rev. 22. 1. Zach. 14.8,9 though it flow in the vallies in the poore low and humble Christians I finde in this Spirituall Treatise of yours two things very experiment all the one is her Legall and the other her more Gospel condition In the first shee is in bondage in blackness and darkness and tempest in much distresse and shadow of death her life drawing nigh unto hell and afflicted with all his waues Psal. 88.3.7 In her Gospel state I find God shewing wonders to the dead making the dead to rise and praise him shewing his loving kindnesse in the grave and his faithfulness in destruction and making known his glory in the dark and his righteousnesse in the land of forgetfulnesse Psal. 88.10 11 12. And truely the voice of joy and gladnesse is in the tabernacles of the righteous Psal. 118. 15. I finde that when God reveales himselfe in Christ in his grace and love the Spirit of the Christian is sweetly raised and cheered and the love of the Lord is as wine even as the spiced wine I make no question but the Lord will fill this soule with more discoveries then this of the Riches of grace this truth being that first discovery of God in love Dear Cosen you do well thus to watch the appearances of God in his and to publish them to the Saints I am yours in the Lord JOHN SALTMARSH The CONTENTS or TABLE of the Book Of this Hand-maid her education Parents and dwelling pag. 4 5 6. Her Deep afflictions 1. In Spirit pag. 6. to 15. 10. 42 43. 59 60. 67. 70. 78. 109. 112. 127. 2. In body pag. 7. end 22. 31. end 55. 78. 115. 128. Her soules deliverance pag. 15. 35. 40. 54. 59. 67. 86. 89. Her sight and hearing given at greatest need pag. 24 25. 29. 34. 43 end The Lord refreshing her unable to eat or drink for many dayes pag. 15. 18. 20 21. 55. 57. 91. 116. 131. Her brother hoped for it pag. 5. and saw pag. 30. The Lords power excellent by this earthly vessell being in trances opening his Gospel-treasure pag. 15. to 33. 54.86 Whilst shee was blind and deafe 34. Which after her hearing was restored shee remembred not at all Of like expressions after it pag. 35. to 43. 51. c. CONFERENCES with some troubled about SIN with a Maid with M ris A. 44 45. to 48. with one 61. to 64. with another 65. another 72. with another 76. another 81. with another 99 another 105. with another 122. Other Conferences about her eating 57 58 about her condition now 85. future 89. About Ordinances 87. 118. About Differences among Saints 88. 39. Powring out the Spirit 90. New Covenant all free 91. The Law 92. 94. 115 Duties 93. 118. Endeavours 64. 94. Of Generall Redemption Free-will Falling away 95 96 97. Punishment for sin 98. Why weak after comfort 115. 128. Of enduring Christs reproach 117. Content with Christ alone 117. 22. Not loving God not before 117. Not proud by visiters 119. Of the Trinity 120. Justification and Sanctification by Christ 121. Items against receiving or telling false reports 125. Praises in Zion 119. Against stubbornnes or murmuring 24 30. Against lying and wronging Conscience pag. 7. 153-155 To be trained up in holy Scriptures pag. 6 3â— 42. 59 60. Against unmercifulnes 103 104. The Lord raiseth her body being neerest death 132. by Faith 135. to arise and eat 138. walk 141. A Thankesgiving day Order 144. Summe and USES of all 151. Cautions about OATHS 155. A TABLE of many of the choise places of holy SCRIPTURE that in this Book are cited opened illustrated or applyed Where * is here added the Translation is neerer the Hebrew or Greek Page GEn. 22. 14. Iehovah jireh God will see 156. d ve 18. Gen. 26 4. All Nations-blessed 97 a 124. q Gen. 41.14 Iosephs garments changed 101. t Exod. 19. 4. Bare you on Eagles wings 149. a Ex. 34.6 Gracious mercifull long-suffering 53.105 e Levit. 16.21 Scape-Goat bears sin to Wildernes 67. k Num. 11.11 Manna-colour as Bdellium 38. o Num. 21. 9. Looking to brazen Serpent heal'd 81. m Deut. 29. 29.
Secrets belong to God 61. e Judg. 14. 23. If he would destroy us would be 124. 1 Sam. 2. 6. He kils and makes alive-to grave 62. d 2 King 21. 16. Streets full of bloud yet saved 17. k 2 Chro. 20. 15. Feare not-battell is not yours 107. n Ch. 32.25 But Hezekiah rendred not according 144. Neh. 8. 10. Eat send portions at thankesgiving 145. Job 3. 3. Jer. 20. 20. Of cursing the birth 12 Job 34.29 If he give quietnes who-trouble 41. c 69. r v. 31. It s meet to say to God that which I see not 64. Ps. 8. 5. †Man lower then Angels that is †Christ 42. a Ps. 9.10 They that know thy Name will trust 37. i Ps. 28.4 Ps. 92.5,6 Regard not the works of 152 Psal. 34. 4. Saved me from all my feares 35. 114. Ps. 36.6 He saves man and beast so saves all men 97 * Ps. 40 9-11 Close not up thy bowels of mercies 2. Ps. 41. 1,2 Blessed that considereth the poor 104. d Ps. 46. 1. God is a Refuge a present help 61. a Ps. 65. 1. Praise waits for God in Zion Why so 119. n Ps. 68.18 Christ received gifts for the Rebellious 66. g Ps. 77. 2. My soule refused to be comforted 104. g Vers. 8. 10. Hide thee for ever t is my infirmity 80. Ps. 72 11-17 All Kings-All Nations shall serve 98. Ps. 73. 1. Yet God is good to Israel pure in heart 68. q * Ps. 85.8 They shall not returne to folly 80. Ps. 87. 7. All my springs are in Christ. 49. Ps. 91. 16. With long life will I satisfie him 133. Ps. 107. 5. O that men would praise the Lord 42. Ps. 110. 3. Willing in the day of thy power 62. i 63. m. Ps. 113.7,8 Raiseth from dunghill-sets with 111. g Ps. 130.1 Out of the depths of misery have I cald 63. f V. 4. Mercy with thee that thou maist be feared 79. d Psal. 138. 2. Word above all thy Name 152. Psal. 144. 15. Happy is the people whose God is 23. m Ps. 147.2 He gathereth the Outcasts 84.104 h. 110. Prov. 18.17 First in his own cause seems just 125. f Pro. 21.13 He that stops his eare at the poors 104. d Pro. 22.6 Train up a child in the way he should go 6. V. 1. A good Name is rather-then great riches 127. Cant. 1.3 By ointment powred forth virgins love 90. V. 5. I am black Cant. 4.7 All fair-no spot in 123. l Cant. 2.3 As an Appletree so is my beloved how 31. d Cant. 2.4,5 He had me into his wine-cellar 57. o V. 8. He comes leaping over mountains skipping 100. l V. 10.11 Arise Winter is past Summer is come 142. Cant. 8.6 Make as a signet-as a seal on the heart 20. g Isa. 8. 17. Wait on him that hides 32,33 w. 71.124 Isa. 14. 1. The Lord had mercy on sinfull Iacob 68. Ver. 3. Hard bondage thou wast made to serve 68. m Isa. 24. 16. Glorifie God in the fires 89. Isa. 26.11 Thy hand is lifted up they will not see 152. Isa. 29. last They that murmured shall learne 159. Isa. 30. 18. The Lord waits to be gracious 95. a 112. b Isa. 32. 9. 11. Wo to careles daughter-at ease 152. Isa. 40.11 Christ carries his Lambs in his bosom 33. c Ver. 28. Iehovah faints not neither is weary 156. o Isa. 41. 10. Feare not I will help thee 77. x Isa. 42. 8. My glory I will not give to an image 156 g Isa. 43. 13. I work who shall let it 62. h. 76. u 124. a V. 25. Wearied yet-I I blotting out 20. h 42. 89.109 d Isa. 44.3 I powre water on dry ground 124. c V. 22. I blot out thy transgressions as a thick cloud 20. k Isa. 46.3 4. To hoary hairs will I carry thee 33. u Isa. 49.8 In an acceptable time have I beard thee 70. u Isa. 49.14 Zion said the Lord hath forsaken me 32. p Isa. 50.10 Walk in darknes-trust in the Name 33.74 l Isa. 53.2 We saw no form nor comlines in Christ. 117. h Isa. 54.8 In a little wrath-but-everlast kindnes 180. V. 10. Mountains shall remove-but not my love 110. m Isa. 55.8 My thoughts are not your thoughts 46 d 78. b Isa. 57. 19. I create-peace to him that 's far off 88. Isa. 59. 16. His own arm laid hold on Salva 75. p 114. c Isa. 63.10 They rebelled vexed his spirit yet sav'd 46. Isa. 64. 6. Our righteousness is as filthy rags 101. t Isa. 65. 1. I am found of them than sought me 64. g 70. JER 2 2-6 Israel was holines-the Lord brought 124. Jer. 2.13 My people forsake fountaine of living 83. f V. 34. Her skirt is full bloud yet mercy 17,18 k Jer. 3 1-14 Played the Harlot-turne I am 17 18. V. 12. 22. Turn I will beale your back slidings 75. r Jer. 4.2 Sweare-in truth in judgement in rig 155 Jer. 5. 11 12. Iudah belyed the Lord said it is not 81. Jer. 8.22 Is there no balm in Gilead Healing 66. Jer. 30. 15. 18. My wound is incurable-yet 84. 110. V. 16. Thy words were found and I did eat them 116. Jer. 17.9 Heart deceitful-desperate-yet cured 63. e 66. d Je. 23.6 Christ is righteousnesse to sinners 81. g Jer. 23. 10. Because of Oaths the Land mourns 156. V. 29. Is not my word-a fire and like a Hammer 83. a Jer. 31.18 Vntamed heifer 38. l 52. b 85. a 109. c 115. V. 25. He will satiate the weary soul replenish 113. l Jer. 31 31-34 I make a new Covenant He put 20. b 92. Jer. 32. 17. Nothing is too hard for God 82. Ver. 39. I will give them one heart-to fear me 83. V. 40. Feare-And they shall not depart from me 105. * Jer. 46.28 Vnpunished r unvisited so* Amos 3.3 98. Jer. 51.5 Israel is not forsaken-of his 83. c 105 g 109. k Ezek. 16.6 In thy bloud I said live 91.123 m V. 8. This was the time of love 61. Ezek. 16. 10. 14. I cloathed thee with Christs gar 101. Ezek. 18.31 32. Turne yee-why will yee dye 52. a Ezek. 33.11 As I live I have no plea. 10.73 c. 96 97. Ezek. 36.25 26. I will give you a new heart 76. 123. o Dan. 2.34 35. Stone Christs kingdome set up 98. Dan. 9.3.20 He set himselfe to prayer then answ 95. b Dan. 10.19 Be strong yea be strong with power 142. Hosea 1. 1-2 Not a people-children 102 o. 105. i Hosea 2.7.14.19 Lost in wildernes comf 80. kl 107. q Hosea 11.3 I taught Ephraim to go he knew not 66. f Hosea 11.8 11,12 Grievous sins yet saved 85. b 109. Hosea 13.9 Thou hast destroyed thy self yet saved 97. Hosea 14.20 Say unto God heale back slidings 64. Ver. 3. With thee fatherlesse sind mercy 107. q Ver. 4. I will heale back slidings 63. y Micah 7.18 Who is like to thee pard 18. m 83.156 f Habak 2.3 Vision will speake though it tarrie 69. t Zeph. 3.12 An afflicted and poor people
glory and grace 150. Ephes. 2. 1-5-12 dead in sins-far off 112. a 105. h Ver. 10. Wee are his workmanship 103. a Ver. 14. Christ is our peace 72. c Ephes. 3.16 Strong with might in inner man 142 Ephes. 3. 21. Glory to the age of ages 159. Ephes. 4.2.8 Labour for that which is good 109. k Ephes. 5. 14. Arise-Christ shall give thee light 74. k Ephes. 5.18 Be not drunk-but filled with-Spirit 50. Ephes. 6. 10. 12. Wrestle in Christs power Phil. 2.7,8 Christ made himselfe of no reputa 117. c Phil. 2.13 Works will and deed in pleasure 64. r 122. e Phil. 3. 8. Excellency of Iesus Christ. 16. b Phil. 4.7 Peace of God-rules the heart 115. Ver. 11. I have learned to be content 117. e 41. e 2 Thes 1. 10. To be admired in his Saints 103. b 1 Tim. 1 13-15 Save chiefest of sinners 18. c 79.103 c 1 Tim. 4. 10. Saveth all men specially 97. 2 Tim. 1.9 Grace before world was 97. 2 Tim. 2.13 He cannot deny himselfe 123. Titus 2.11 Grace teacheth to deny ungodlines 94. d Titus 3. 3. Living in malice hatefull 117. Heb. 2.6 Opens Ps. 8.15.6 to be of Christ. 42. a Ver. 14. Christ took our nature 121. i Heb. 6. 18. That flie to Christ for refuge 100. q Heb. 8 1-10 New covenant opened 123. n Heb. 10. 14. He hath perfected for ever 18. n Heb. 11.6 Beleeve that God is-then come 95. g Heb. 12.2 Christ the Author and finisher of 79. e Heb. 12.7 Whom he loves he chastens 99. l Heb. 13.8 Christ yesterday to day and 48. r 163. o James 2. 11. Doe not kill opened 38. 1 Pet. 1.25 Word by Gospel preached opened 131. y 1 Pet. 2. 9. Turne from darknesse to light 111. q 1 Pet. 5. 8. Satan goes about 35. b 149. 2 Pet. 1. 19. Till the day-star arise in the heart 53. c 2 Pet. 3. 1. Stirre up-by remembrance 94. b 1 Joh. 3. 2. Wee shall see him as he is 63. n 1 Joh. 4.16.19 He loved first so we love him 118. k 1 Joh. 5. 6. 8. By water and bloud 53. h 122. q Ver. 7. Three heare witnesse in Heaven 120. l 1 Joh. 5.10 Vnbeleever makes God a lyar 20. e 126. k Rev. 2. 17. Eate of hidden Manna 39. n Rev. 3. 19. Whom I love I chasten 98. l 99. l Rev. 4. 8. Holy three or nine times repeated 20. o Rev. 21. 23. 25. Lambe is lasting light 35. a c. THE EXCEEDING RICHES OF GRACE ADVANCED THE Relator hereof being one who desires to feare the Name of the LORD having been an eye and ear-witnesse both of the sad sufferings and longed-for deliverance of this handmaid M ris SARAH WIGHT and upon his enquiring at the first and best hand having many of her precious Evangelicall expressions as the first fruits thereof viz. from pag. 16 to 35 testified to him by such as are well approved off for godlinesse and faithfulnesse who were also eye and ear-witnesses with himselfe of the rest here recorded And he observing and noting down presently from time to time since this happy change such * Glad-tidings uttered of the Righteousnesse of God of his Faithfulnesse and Salvation of his * benigne Kindnesse and Truth he could not but Publish it to the World for the exalting of this glorious Name of of God and for the refreshing of poor hungry empty sinfull burden'd drooping desparing soules that judge none to be so base and hopelesse as themselves and for the building up of others in their holy faith he would not might not durst not keep it to himselfe alone and so conceale it hide it or withhold it from others as he would not for all the world have the Lord withhold or hide or * close up his bowels of mercies from his own soule as the Psalmist argueth * Psal. 40. 9 10 11. Hebrew For the better satisfying of some that would hardly give credit to the wonderfull things herein related It was judged meet there should be laid down 1. First somewhat touching this Handmaid her parentage and dwelling place 2. Touching her Education pag. 5. 3. Touching her Afflictions in Spirit especially since shee wronged her Conscience at her being about twelve yeares old till April 6. 1647. shee being in September following 16. yeares old And of godly Ministers and others that knew her soule in adversity and sought to comfort her and of such as have seen her and spake with her since the LORD hath comforted her Pag. 6.8 9. 4. Touching the Lords delivering her April 6. 1647. when no creature could help shee being then struck deafe blind and lame and terrified beyond measure this extremity was the Lords opportunity pag. 14 15. Then 1. of her so continuing deafe and blind from April 6 till April 19. many dayes together except part of April 15. wherein shee had satisfaction to her troubled Spirit that her Mother had pardon'd her murmurings against her And part of April 17 to see and heare her Brother as Pag. 25. 29. 2. Of her being acted both then and often after to admire utter forth and magnifie the exceeding Riches of Gods Grace to sinners to her the chiefe of sinners Her speeches of Grace which follow were all in her Bed being in the time of her bodies great weaknesse caused partly through her former deep sense of Gods wrath consuming and pining away And by seeking to beat out her eyes and Braines and since this happie change her stomack being exceeding weak not eating at all till June 11 and drinking so little as is noted her voice thus being very low and oft whispering it could be heard by none but that were very neer her uttered in an humble melting manner stop'd sometimes with tears of sighs her eyes being alwayes covered because of that weaknesse and by spending her selfe in speaking to distressed soules and to others 3. Of her Conferences then and since with many despairing soules whose Names and dwelling places are so born by the Relator in tender respect to themselves and their friends least some not experienced in Temptations might the more reproach them or the Name of God for what these uttered in distresse or through Temptation But their Expressions and the Answers to them are recorded as neer as could be being then writ down for help to themselves hereafter and to others in like condition if the Lord will Hoping this will not offend them 2. Conferences with others about the Church-Ordinances the Spirits powring forth about the New Covenant the Law Works Mans Endeavours Punishment for sinne Redemption c. 4. Of the Lords power in sustaining her above 75 dayes by a little water taken once in three or four or five dayes and very little besides And then raising her by FAITH All these are here set down though the latter are set downe occasionally and not all in this same order I. TOuching her Earthly Parentage This M ris Sarah Wight was daughter to M r Thomas Wight sometimes of
daughter to the Lady Roberts M ris Sarah Iones wife to M r Tho. Iones Esquire of Tower-hill M ris Berney of Norsolk M r and M ris Liggon M ris Wilson at Nags-head-Taverne M ris Thorp at Grave Maurice M r P. Burbon and his wife M ris Owen and M ris Hannah Allen Booksellers M ris Manning of Tower-street M ris Elizabeth Waldo sister to M r Iohn Pocock M r Ellis and M ris Ellis M ris Hawkins M ris Flood and M ris Thare and her cousins M r Brigs Taylor and his wife all neer London-stone and of their neerer neighbours M r Lewes Merchant M ris Palmer M ris Thurrel M ris Grace Philips M ris Dupper M ris Aires c. Besides her Brother M r Ionathan Vaughan of Alsoules in Oxford her uncle M r Iames Wight of Southwark and his wife and other two Ants M ris Anne M ris Mary Wight Many moe might be named who have seen her of late have bin much affected in hearing of the Lords wonderful workings in and towards her But these are sufficient to witnesse what they have seen or heard and beleeve many of them being persons of note and of much esteem in London amongst them that fear the Lord. The Naming of them the Relator desires may not be offensive to any of them seeing 't is done for the more assuring this great and memorable worke of Gods mercy to some that like Thomas will not beleeve it unlesse at least they may speak with some that have been present with her About a moneth before her great deliverance Satan having but a short time so to torment her her stormes and tempests were greatest of all She was grievously hurried with Temptations so terrified shee could not rest at all for many dayes and nights together Whilst shee was able to goe abroad her Mother would have her goe with her to heare Sermons on the Lords dayes and on the Lecture-dayes there One Lecture-day she was gone forth before her Mother who missing her went to the Assembly and not finding her there came forth and sudddenly went and sent towards Thames to seek her where shee had been to have cast her selfe in but was stayd from it by the power and goodnesse of God and being found shee had a command on her spirit to goe to heare that Sermon and her Mother coming to her shee readily yeelded to goe with her Mother to the Lecture there Wherein was proved what great favour God will shew towards the stock of the Iews that he will grass multitudes of them into their own Olive pardoning their sinnes against Christ restoring them to great dignity c. He that preached went in to M ris Wights house there after the Sermon and spake with her daughter asking her if the Lord spake any peace to her thereby Shee answered shee would not for all the world but shee had heard that Sermon Being asked why so Shee said That God will shew mercy to the Iewes and they are the basest people on earth that so hate the very name of Christians and much more Christ himselfe and yet that God will call them This supported her a little at that present but it stayed not with her and shee was againe under horrid Temptations to beleeve there was no God no Devill no Heaven and no Hell but what shee felt within her One day being strongly carried on in that temptation that there was no other Hell but here in the conscience As that famous M ris Hanywood had said and done with a Venice Glasse who said shee was as sure to be damn'd as that was to break and therewith threw it from her to break it yet it brake not so did shee with her little white drinking cup an earthen cup shee said As sure as this cup shall breake there is no other Hell and therewith she threw the cup with violence against the far side of the chamber and though it light against the wood it brake not Her mother took it up said Loe here childe it is not breke Shee got it again and suddenly said so did with it so again againe and once against the edge of the door Thus shee struggled and did foure or five times and yet it brake not but at the fift time a little nip brake out And now since the Lord hath created peace to her shee hath desired to drinke still out of that her little cup till their Water-bearer unawares cast it downe and then it brake all to pieces In her despairing fits shee severall times would turne to the places in Iob in Ieremy where they cursed the day of their birth and shee said to this effect Iob cursed the day wherein he was borne and said Wherefore hast thou brought me forth of the womb Oh that I had given up the ghost and no eye had seen me Shee turning to the places Iob 3.3 Iob 10. 18. And Ier. 20. 14. to the end Ieremy cursed the man that brought tidings of his birth with bitter curses because his mothers womb was not his grave and said Wherefore came I out of the womb to see toile and sorrow that my dayes should be consumed with shame But she said Have not I much more cause to say so then they had for they were in a blessed condition but I am curs'd and must be a fire-brand of Hell for ever These and many other desperate expressions shee frequently used especially in the last moneth of her sorrows When they encreased daily so that her soule was exceedingly troubled and shee was as it were all shattered to pieces And shee was so weary of her life and of her selfe and of everything shee was never at such a passe in such extremitie in all her life before Her tender and good Mother attending on her continually day and night to prevent her mischieving her selfe being still upheld with great hopes that the Lord in his good time would come in to her with his consolations yea shee was verily perswaded so as was also her Brother in Oxford And this made her sore taske the more easie which els had been intolerable Yet when this extremitie had continued long so that for many dayes and nights together her mother had taken no rest At last shee was even wearied out with continuall watchings and to the end her self might enjoy some rest to prevent harme to her selfe shee had spoke to a friend desiring that her daughter might be for a little season with her which her friend was very willing unto and her daughter was desirous to goe with her that her Mother might enjoy rest But the Lord prevented both in his goodnesse For when her friend was come her daughter was taken with such an exceeding trembling and such extremity of sorrow and trouble and weaknes that shee was not able to goe with her A forerunner of her deliverance Then her Mother procured a maid that feared God to help to look to her who came that same
ceased speaking and then remained without speaking or drinking without sight or hearing these being again taken from her from that 15. til the 17 th of April On the same 15. day shee asked if her Brother or the maid would goe to M r Simpson to desire him to come to her When he came shee had done speaking and seemed to be in a trance and would not speak again till her time came On the same 15 th day before shee ceased shee further said I thought I was the bad theef but now I see I am as the good theef I was really crucified with Christ a Gal. 2.20 though I was not in the appearance of any bodily eye but as I was in the loyns of Adam when he sinned b Rom. 5.12 Heb. 7.9 16. I was the nailes in his hands and in his feet and the speare in his side c Isa. 53. 5. The maid desired her to eat something shee answered I cannot I am full Again shee said How old am I Her Mother saith she shall be sixteen yeer old in September next 1647. Shee went on in her speech thus Thirteen fourteen fifteen sixteen so long I have been a filthy sinner Now I have been foure dayes in the grave with Lazarus d Joh. 11.39 shee having been four yeers in deep despaire and now I am risen e Col. 3. 1. to live with Iesus Christ for ever in glory He led Captivitie Captive and received gifts for men even for the Rebellions f Psal. 68. 18. He came to the poore Publican that could but speak one word not to the proud Pharisee that us'd many words g Luk. 18. 13. Iesus Christ said The Cup that my heavenly Father gives me to drink shall I not drink it h Joh. 18. 11. He drank the dregs the very dregs and he had no sin and shall the Saints think much to sip of the Cup when he drank of it before us The yoke of Christ is easie and his burden is light but the yoke of sin is heavy and wrath is heavy i Mat. 11. 28. The yoke of Christ is easie because Christ helps them to hear it himselfe and that makes it easie The Saints shew'd have no sufferings if it were not for their good k Rom. 8. 28. 31. els they should have no sufferings at all Christ comes leaping over the mountaines and skipping over the hils There 's nothing in the soule but mountains of sin and hils m Luk. 3. 5. of corruption he doth not come running nor walking but leaping and skipping to a poor n Hos. 2. 14. bewildred soule not to a garden ready trim'd he trims it for himselfe to abide in for ever for ever If wee confesse our sinnes hee 's faithfull and just to forgive us o 1 Joh. 1. 9. One confession and two things to that Faithfull and just Hee 'l give water of life to them that thirst p Rev. 22. 17. Not onely water but water of life He hides himselfe that wee may seek the more earnestly after him q Hos. 5. last and that he may reveale himselfe more fully I that was an enemy am made an heire with Christ to live in glory for ever for ever Christ is my Brother my elder Brother r Mar. 3. 35. How sweet are the Teachings of the Spirit to my soule Sweeter then the Teachings of men and Angels They may speak much to the eare and that 's well but they could not say to my soule Thy sinnes are pardon'd and Christ Iesus loves thee These and moe heavenly expressions shee uttered in a humble gracious manner that same 15 th day The relating of them thus brokenly cannot so affect the heart as to have heard her selfe so tender-heartedly speak them For this half hour or more of her now speaking the Lord restored her hearing wherein shee both saw and heard her Mother as two days following shee saw and heard her Brother also whom shee longed to see and heare and was satisfied And having thus spoken what shee desired then to say she ceased and rested And then both her sight and her hearing were againe taken from her Shee abiding as asleep but it seems slept little but in that resting time much enjoying communion with Jesus Christ her souls rest So was shee silent from that morning April 15. till the morning of the 17 th day The night following April 16. shee was very sick labouring for breath as if shee would have dyed April 17. being the last day in the week in the morning shee asked for water A little being given her to drinke shee said Give mee it freely Christ hath given me Faith freely and love freely and joy in himselfe And having drunk again shee proceeded thus Wee love him because he loved us first a 1 Joh. 4. 19. Wee rejoyce in him because he rejoyced in us first Wee desire him because he desired us first I could not beleeve that I should be saved but now if men and Devils stood there before my eyes and should tell me I should not be saved I would not beleeve them I see him that 's invisible and look on him whom I have pierced and I mourne over him Doe not you love him if you see him as I see him you would admire him A sight of him would satisfie Nations A sparkle of him is more glorious then the world b Phil. 3. 8. Mat. 17. 2. This day shee asked againe for M r Simpson for M r Iessey Shee answered her selfe thus I cannot heare and why doe I aske a Question After this shee remembring her Mother had told her that her Brother was come shee spake of her Ioseph for so shee called him and now shee was desirous to see him And said Mine eyes have seen my heavenly Ioseph and why shall I not see my earthly Ioseph The Lord hath opened my spirituall eyes and why should I not beleeve that he will open my bodily eyes And shee called for water to wash her eyes and having washed her eyes her brother being present by her shee saw him and took him by the hand and puld him and told him of the greatnesse of the love of Christ saying Why came he from the bosome of the Father but to die for sinners the chiefe of sinners and that makes the Grace great Shee then told him what condition shee had been in thus in a sweet humble manner I was at the very brink of Hell and Iesus Christ puld me out And how can I but love him He came for the disobedient and unholy and unthankfull and for murmurers as I have been a Mat. 9. 13. If any one see and feel what I have seen and felt they would take heed of murmuring against God and a Parent You never murmured so much against God and against my Mother as I have done Ah ah ah sighing and weeping as shee spake But I speake the rather said shee that none
should despaire because I have found mercy b 1 Tim. 13-16 I am not able to expresse how sweet that word is Behold O daughter of Ierusalem thy King Hab smiling at that word thy King cometh meek meek cometh meek riding on an Asse * Mat. 21.5 even on a Colt the foal of an Asse †Job 11.12 not on a horse ready trim'd He comes to a wild Asses colt to one unaccustomed to the yoke as Ephraim was | Jer. 31. 19 20. Yet Ephraim was a deare son a pleasant childe They cast their cloths on the Asse He cast his skirt over me not a skanty skirt a skirt that covered all my filthinesse My beloved is mine and I am my beloveds As an Appletree is among the Trees of the wood so is my beloved among the sons d Cant. 2. 3. What a pleasant thing is an Appletree among the Trees of the wood There 's both Protection and Provision there 's Protection from the beat under his shadow and his fruit was sweet to me there 's Provision Christ is protection a shelter a shelter from the storme e Isa. 4.6 Christ keeps his Church himselfe Men put others in their Garrisons but Christ keeps his Church his own self f Psal. 121. 4 5. I that was a far off far off from peace am made nigh by the bloud of the Crosse g Eph. 2. 13. Her brother spake aloud to her to take somewhat to refresh her body Shee then heard him and answered I cannot I have what I did desire I have a crucified Christ I am so full of the Creator that I now can take in none of the Creature I am fild with heavenly Manna h Joh. 6. 33-35 I am sore from the crown of the head to the sole of the foot But let the Lord doe what be will with me let him take me to his eternall rest I am content or leave me in this vaile of misery I am content i Phil. 4. 11. Thou art a free agent Thou workest when thou wilt and where thou wilt Shee said moreover Let the Lord doe with mee what he will if he throws me into hell I le be contented because I have deserv'd it k Ezr. 9. 13. But his mercy will save mee in the day of wrath l 1 Thes. 1. 10. Eph. 2. 3. 5. There 's no sin separates the soule from Christ but the sin of Vnbeliefe m Joh. 5. 40. And this is all the Faith I look after beleeving a full Christ to a nothing Creature a full Christ to a nothing Creature n Joh. 7. 37. Nothing makes a difference between me and the Devill but free Grace free Grace o Eph. 2. 1-8 He hath not forgot to be gracious he hath not forgot to be mercifull though I often said he had He hath not forgotten to be gracious though I said he had p Isa. 49. 14 15. Shee prayed for her beloved Ioseph her brother to this effect Blessed be Joseph of the Lord. The good will of him that dwelt in the bush be on the head of Joseph and on the top of the head of him that was separated from his Brethren q Deut. 33.16 Shee asked for the same persons that shee had named before and said They have sought the Lord for mee desire them to praise and magnifie the Lord with me When these came shee had ceased speaking and then shee lay still without speaking or drinking till the 19 th day having not eaten any thing at all since the 27 th of March nor drunke any thing at all but two or three of her little cups of fair water and that onely at once in two or three days as is beforesaid April 19. Shee put her finger to her mouth desiring water And one cup was given her then shee began thus God is a refuge and a shield from the stormes and tempests He hath avenged me on my adversary meaning the Devill that thought to be avenged on me and I thought he would but the Lord hath avenged me on him Shall the unrighteous Iudge doe justly meaning in avenging the widow on her adversary and shall not the righteous Iudge do justly Yea a thousand times more r Luk. 18. 6 7. Happy happy happy is the people that have the God of Jacob for their Excellency and whose strength is in the Lord s Psal. 144 15. Behold the Lord will come with a strong band He shall feed the flock like a Shepherd He shall carry his Lambs in his arme t Isa. 40. 11 12. I have born thee from the belly which have carried thee from the womb even to thy old age I am he and even to hoary haires will I carry thee u Isa. 46. 3 4. I le wait on him that hides himselfe from the house of Jacob w Isa. 8. 17. He hides himselfe from the House of Jacob yet they were his people Thou art worth the waiting for if one should wait from the day of their birth to the very day of their death even one glimpse of thee is worth all He that walks in darknesse and seeth no light let him trust on the Name of the Lord and stay himselfe upon his God his God though he be in darkness stay on his God Isa. 50 10. Bodily sustenance being offered to her shee not having eaten any thing at all during twenty-four dayes last past nor drunk any thing at all but fair water and but very little of that Shee thus answered Doe you think I doe not eat How doe you think I live Being asked what shee did eat Shee said No eye of man sees it but the eye of God None could tast the sweetnesse of the Manna by looking on it none but they that eat of it or of the Honey out of the Rock The redeemed of the Lord are a Royall Priesthood a chosen Generation He hath made us Kings and Priests unto God 1 Pet. 2. 9. Rev. 1.6 More precious then Gold Gold of Ophir The Lord hath avenged me on mine enemy that roared over mee night and day to have devoured me but he hath delivered mee They that know thy Name will trust in thee because thou Lord never failest them that seek thee Psal. 9. 10. Before shee called meaning her selfe he answered whilst shee was asking he heard and delivered me from all my feares Shee asked againe will not M r Iessey and M r Simpson come to praise and magnifie the Lord with mee they have prayed for me Then were her eares opened that since April 6. had been deafe except onely at that time that shee longed to heare that her Mother had pardon'd her and that shee might see and hear her Brother For then shee being asked whether shee desired to live shee heard and said I am contented with what the Lord will though I would rather dye Being told M r Iesse and M r Simpson desired shee might live Doe they said shee I must
doe what the Lord will The Cup that my Father gives me to drinke shall I not drink it Whether to live or to dye Her eyes still being weak and closed shee asked whether it was night or no it was answered her it was night Shee said There will be a day when there will be no night but the Lord and the Lamb shall be the light and walk in the midst of it a Rev. 21. 23. 25. 3. The Lord hath delivered me from my enemy from the roaring of the Lyon that roared over me b 1 Pet. 5.8 the Lord hath triumphed over him And speaking of this to her mother shee said Doe you not say t is well mother And praise the Lord He is able to save to the uttermost all that come to the Father by him c Heb. 7.25 You may trust me now Mother and not be afraid of me meaning of hurting her self with knife or water as formerly shee oft had attempted for if no body look to me the Lord will keep me And the good Samaritan that heal'd my soule d Luk. 10.33 will heale my body too ☜ To Hannah Guy that looked to her and watched with her shee said The Lord will reward all your labour of love So shee lay down and spake no more till the next day at night April 20. at night there being divers neighbours and loving friends come together to see her M ris Collet M ris Caron M ris Dupper the Relator and divers others about twelve or moe which greatly desired to heare her speak being greatly refreshed with what they had heard of her expressions the Lord having been praised in her behalfe both in that Parish and in Ab-Church their neighbour-Parish and els-where where prayers had been put up in her behalfe shee now lying still and had not spoken two dayes together since April 6. These desiring if the will of God were so that they might heare her selfe speak shee lying with a linnen cloth over her eyes which were very weak the maid told her M r Iessey was there he being in the company neer to her she then began to speak to him and said O magnifie the Lord with me for he hath delivered me from all my feares not from one but from all my feares a Psal. 34.4 This shee spake as all that follows with a low voice in a humble modest melting manner her teares sometimes stopping her speech He and the rest listned and were greatly affected in hearing her It cannot affect so much in hearing it at second hand as if you had heard her selfe with such brokennes of heart uttering it Shee proceeded on thus which presently was writ down He hath regarded the low estate * Luk. 1.48 the base b Luk. 1.48 estate of his hand-maid I rejoyce in him I mourn over him whom I have pierced c Zach. 12. 10. It was not Judas or Souldiers so much as I that pierced him I thought I was the bad Theef but he hath said to me as to the good Theef d Luk. 23.43 Thou shalt be with me in Paradise The earthly Paradise was a Type of the Heavenly Paradise That was fading and lost but this endures for ever O praise the Lord with me for he hath heard mee and looked on me the vilest of sinners the worst the chiefest of sinners On me that was rebellious disobedient unthankfull unholy a murmurer as much as ever the children of Israel in the wildernesse the teares oft trickling down and she stopping through her weeping and their murmuring kept them out of Canaan e 1 Cor. 10.10 but though I have so murmured he hath saved me I was at the very pits brink at the very brink of hell and the Lord fetch'd me out And is not he worthy of praise The Lamb is worthy to open the Book For none in Heaven nor earth neither men nor Angels could open these brazen gates this iron door this hard heart of mine but he putting her hand to her own breast When I confest my sin he forgave me the punishment I could never confesse my sin til now that he made known his mercy to me though I sought it diligently to confesse it Being asked when was this that see confest her sin Shee said Now since I saw his mercy And now he hath made knowne to me his mercy Nothing but the sense of his mercy could ever bring me to confesse my sin f Luk. 15.18 indeed I would faine have got comfort by mine own workings my own doings or from a Creature and I spake to men but I never could get comfort by the creature but the Lord himselfe did it I could not love him till he made known his love to me g 1 Joh. 4.19 to me the chiefest of sinners If all the sins in all the world were in one party I thought it was all nothing to mine I could not finde any in all the Scriptures that obtain'd mercy that was in my case Yes he hath shew'd mercy to me the chiefest of sinners h 1 Tim. 1.15 O that he should come from the bosome of the Father to dye for sinners for me the chiefest of sinners If all the men in the world should have told me that Christ dyed for me that my sins were pardon'd I could not have beleev'd them But now if all the men in the world Angels Devils should tell me they are not forgiven I would not beleeve them What pains did I take in going to men to have them speak comfort to me they could not doe it But Christ did it in a moment They that know his Name will trust in him they cannot but trust in him i Psal. 9.10 If the world knew him they could not but love him He is the chiefest of ten thousands k Can. 5.10 He is more to be desired in his lowest estate then millions of worlds if millions of worlds were all in one Behold O daughter of Jerusalem Thy King comes meek that he might teach his people meeknesse He came on an Asses Colt not on a horse finely trim'd to an untam'd heiser unaccustom'd to the yoke to me that was ungodly unprepared to Ephraim that was as a wild Asses colt Surely after I was turned I repented l Jer. 31. 18 19. I could not turne to him nor love him till he shew'd his love to me and turn'd me Praise the Lord with me that hath shew'd mercy on one in so desperate a case as I was in I could set nothing before me but curse and hell and wrath night and day O that others may be are what God hath done for such a one Ps. 66.16 I would none may DESPAIR of Gods mercy that hath done thus for me If any did know what it is to murmure against God and against a Parent as I have done and felt what I have felt they would never doe it A like warning is pag. 24. The Relator having heard shee now
had not eaten any thing at all for twenty-foure dayes or more and drunk nothing in all this time since April 6. but onely faire water neither that but two or three little cups together once in two or three dayes He desired her if shee could to eat to preserve life for when the Lord saith Thou shalt not kill he implies the Affirmative Thou shalt use all good meanes to preserve life Jam. 2.11 And though he and all those present were so affected even to admiration in hearing a child so speak yet he wished her to forbear speaking too much because it spent her shee being so very weak Shee said In rest and returning shall I be saved in quietnes and confidence shall be my strength m Isa. 30. 15. I have Manna to eat of he feeds me with hidden Manna n Rev. 2.17 It was pleasant to the eye o Num. 11. 11. but they felt no sweetnesse by looking on it but by tasting of it When shee ended speech shee desired he would praise the Lord with her which he performed accordingly those beforesaid being present ☞ Another time when one gave her a Poesie shee looking on it and smelling its sweetnes commended the workmanship of God in the severall flowers saying to this effect The flowers are all fragrant and some more fragrant then others they have different colours and different smels and all come out of the earth So are the Saints they all are in Christ and in him they all are sweet and savoury but are of different strength and judgement The strong should beare with the weak and not despise them April 25. being the Lords day when many Christians were come to see her amongst others M r M ris Liggon the Relator M ris Iones M ris Aires M ris Gr. Philips and others In like humble manner her tender eyes being covered and lying still as shee had kept her bed being very weak since April 6. with a low voice as speaking to her selfe shee said How sweet is it to my thoughts that an infinite God should be a Rock and a Refuge to a finite Creature a sure Rock and hiding place from all stormes tempests whatsoever Ps. 46. 1. When the man was wounded by theeves and lay by the way the Priest and the Levite passed by they passed by and helped not The creature comfort failes and then the good Samaritan helps a Luk. 10 35. Christ saves whom none els will or can and when there 's nothing in the Creature to move him The wounded man did not first desire the Samaritans help The deeper the wound is the more honour to him that cures him He set him on his own Beast leaves him not to himselfe to goe where he will but brought him in and gave two pence for him I beleeve that holds out Faith and Love b Gal. 5.6 None cared for him refuge fail'd then Christ helps and take care for him c Ps 27.10 One speaking to her of her former condition how far shee was then from hope ever to obtaine mercy shee said If all the world should be saved then it may be I should be one but els no hopes for me That Peter Mary Magdalen David Manasses were saved it was nothing to me no if Judas should be saved yet should not I. All their sin and Pauls in Persecuting and the Theefe on the Crosse and Judas and all I could read of or heare of if all their sins were all put together in one yet all were not so bad as I. Yet I obtained mercy that thought my time of mercy was past that I was damn'd already through unbeliefe I said many a time There 's no hope in thy end and I thought I saw it I may say It was good for me to be afflicted I prize his mercies the more Psal. 119. 69. All terrors could not humble me but the sight of his mercy did I could never be kindly humbled till then It was not mine own fitting or mine own humbling but Christs fitting and Christs humbling when he looks upon such a one that humbles He comes with his power on the soule and causeth the soule to beleeve Eph. 1. 19. My tongue was not able to tell the misery I was in before continually and now my tongue is not able to tell what love and mercy hath been shewed to me I can never enough expresse his Name I would faine have been dissolved to be with him d Phil. 1. 23. It was a hard thing for me to be content to live here still but its easie for him to teach to be willing to live or dye and he hath taught mee c Phil. 4. 11. 13. I was so desperate I cared not what became of me oft was I at very brink of death and hell even at the very gates and they were open for me and then Christ shut them and fetch'd me out as Daniel that was in the Lyons den but it was his mercy that stop'd the mouth of the roaring Lyon and delivered me Dan. 6. The hundreth and seventh Psalme O that men would therefore praise the Lord for his goodnes and declare the wonders that he doth for the children of men I would that Psalm were often read over The goodnesse of God is unsearchable How great is the excellency of his Majesty that yet he would look upon such a one as I I was full of Terror the week before I kept my bed I rested not day nor night I thought no death was bad enough for me If all kinds of death were put together in one it was too good for me I walked continually as in fire and brimstone for rebelling and murmuring against God and against a Parent When he hides his face who is able to beare it and when he gives quietnes who then can trouble Iob 34.29 I can testifie the truth of both these He hath spoke the word to me Thy sins are forgiven thee I even I am he that blotteth out thy transgressions for mine own sake Isa. 43. 25. Iesus Christ is unchangeable therefore I was not consumed Wee may say with admiration What is man that thou art so mindfull of him or the son of man that thou so regardest him thou madest him lower then Angels a Ps. 8. is meant of Christ as Heb. 2.6 to 18 vers proves Iesus Christ took our nature to take part of our sufferings and that we should follow him in sufferings not think strange Wee have not a High Priest that cannot be touched with a feeling of our infirmities b Heb. 2.17 18. Heb. 4.15 but he was made like to us that he might sympathize with us Blesse the Lord O my soule Which forgiveth all thine iniquitie and healeth all thine infirmity In my misery my flesh and my bones pined and consumed away and I was neer to death the Lords chearing the heart doth good like a medicine I now recover strength I read the Scriptures from a childe
but I understood not what I read till now that I had the Teaching of the Spirit He is worth the waiting for him There is a blessing pronounced to such Blessed are all that wait for him I did not wait patiently for him I was weary and could wait no longer But he is not weary He faileth not He lets the Creature goe his way for a time for his own good to humble him more and shew his mercy the more He hath him in a chaine and the enemy in a chaine So he hath the soule to dispose of it My times are in thy hands that he might magnifie mercy indeed and free love indeed No soule ever was as I have been I am sure of it If all the sins of all sinners that I read of or heard talk of were in one it were all short of me And yet t is his goodnesse that such a one as I should obtaine mercy I wish all may take heed of * The like expressions were by H.T. another in London in sicknesse Iuly 1. 1646. censuring the vilest creatures that are seeing the Lord hath done thus for me the vildest Creature but pitty them with teares of bloud One asked her how long it was since her hearing was restored to her She answered A few days agoe I asked if M r Simson and M r Jesse would come to praise the Lord with me and I found it was restored at that instant Part of a former Conference between her and another young Gentlewoman M ris A. whilst both were in despaire They met in Lawrence Pountney to hear the Lecture before it began M ris Sarah saw one walk about and about in a sad habit and went to her and asked her how shee did shee answered In as sad a condition as ever was any M ris Sarah None is in a Condition like to mine So they sate together and after that they went together and spake further of their sad conditions each counting their own state the worse Another day M ris A. said The Lord knows that knows all things that I would rather then all the world that I were in your condition M ris Sarah W. answ But if you knew how desperate my condition is you would be afraid to change place with me for you know not my sad sorrows None in the world can compare with mine Except you would desire to be in hell you would not desire to be in my condition M ris A. I must be damn'd M ris S. I am damn'd already from all eternitie to all eternitie it s not to doe but t is done already M ris A. I was a great professor but I was but an hypocrite and an hypocrites hope shall perish M ris S. I have bin an hypocrite a revolter a backslider M ris A. I know it shall be well with you M ris S. As well as it was with Judas who repented and hang'd himselfe which I must do before I shall be free from these torments At their parting for a farewell M ris A. said I think I shall perish ere I see you againe Yet the Lord spared her and shee came to her againe and they were somewhat gladded to see each other againe that could be sensible each of the others condition To sadded soules some joy it is to have companions Shee had another Conference April 24. 1647. since shee was comforted with another Maid being in deep despair that had heard of her former despair and her late comforts The words were to this effect Maid I am darkened in understanding and I am tempted to beleeve there is no God nor no Creation from God M ris Sarah W. ans So was it with mee I was so tempted The very Creation shews there is a God a Rom. 1. 19 20. and yet I could not beleeve it Maid said Some kept a fast for me yesterday and I remain as I was still and therefore I am the more terrified that no prayers shal be heard for me M ris Sarah W. So was it with me I was so terrified when there was no answer of prayers for me when in my dayes were kept for me But I was rather worse then better For I knew no prayers should be heard for a damned Creature I concluded I was rejected But the Lords time is the best time to give an answer b Psal. 88. 9. 16. Maid I have resisted the Spirit The Lord hath spoken mercy to me but I have resisted it M ris Sarah W. The day of Sealing was not come then you could not resist that work when he comes with power c Psal. 110. 3. els you would make God weaker then you God would bring you this way about and hides himselfe when you have grieved the Spirit that you may seek him the more earnestly and that he may give you the surer comforts and to make himselfe a glorious Name as in Isa. 63. 10 11. They rebelled and vexed his holy Spirit therefore he fought against them as an enemy Then he remembred the dayes of old when he led them by the right hand of Moses dividing the water before them to make himselfe an everlasting Name That led them through the deep So through the deepest troubles till the Spirit of the Lord causeth them to rest to make himselfe a glorious Name Though you have rebeld and vex'd his holy Spirit what could you doe more yet saith he I have carried thee all the dayes of old I le be your guide even to death Maid It s not possible that such a one as I should find mercy I look every moment to be swallowed up M ris Sarah W. But Gods thoughts are not your thoughts nor Gods wayes your wayes d Isa. 55. 8. In the Wildernesse Israel murmured yet the Rock followed them not they the Rock but went from the Rock yet the Rock followed them and that Rock is Christ e 1 Cor. 10. 4. So this Rock will follow you in this your Wildernesse Maid It s not possible I finde such a wicked heart that if it were not for feare of wrath or punishment I should fall into all wickednesse M ris Sarah W. Now you shew you beleeve there is a God You are not worse then Peter that so denied and forswore him against his Conscience f Mar. 14. 71. or then Mary Magdalen that had seven Devils was full of the Devill g Chap. 16. 9. The Theefe on the Crosse Persecuting Paul that persecuted Christ and my selfe was so injurious and blasphemous The chiefe of sinners yet these found mercy And what can you be more You can be but a sinner and the chiefe of sinners He dyed for such He is therefore cald Jesus because he shall save his people from their sinnes What people those that were not a people these he cals and these he saves Maid I am no better for going to the means and am ready to neglect all M ris Sarah W. I was so terrified I was not able
to goe to the meanes and then I was terrified for not going to them I had no rest in either If I went salvation was turn'd into condemnation to me If I went not it was death I was on the Rack Maid None can be in a worse condition then I full of feares M ris Sarah W. Of late my case was so that if one had been all day burning in fire they could not have been in a worse condition Maid I am in such extremities of late I am even almost spent and have nothing to relieve me by M ris Sarah W. So it was with mee of late When you are at the lowest Christ is readiest to restore soule and body If you see your selfe nothing and see all fulnesse in Christ you are the neerest to comfort a Mat. 18. 19. The Lord hath done as much for me as ever for any as much as for the man that had the Legion of Devils in him he was cloathed and in his right mind he hath cloathed me and put me in my right mind and set me at his feet b Mar. 5. 15. God doth away our sins as a thick cloud but it wants manifesting to your soule His time is the best time therefore wait for him Maid I am an ungracious creature I cannot wait any longer M ris Sarah W. But the Lord waits on you You think you are ungracious and he waits to be gracious to such as you There 's as much of the power of the Lord seen in upholding a soule in such a condition as in delivering it Maid I am utterly lost M ris Sarah W. Not in his account you must be lost in your selfe that you may be found in him He came to seek and to save that was lost a Luk. 19. 10. Thus shee endeavoured the comforting another with the Consolations wherewith shee was comforted yet the poor soule went sad away And shee being much affected with the others sad condition pittying her after shee was gone away shee desired some that came to see her to pray for that maid After this came another woman to her being also in deep despair having heard of her former despair and present comforts and complained to her of her sad condition To whom shee gave such succouring Answers for upholding and refreshing her weary soule as shee had done to the former speaking to her till shee was very much spent Another that came to see her having heard her so manifest her fulnes of joy and content in God in such high streines Told her shee must expect a change and had need to lay up in store against times to come Shee answered thus Sarah W. If I should look to take out of my store I should quickly be a Bankrupt a Prodigal and spend it quickly But Christ hath in store for me All my fresh b Psal. 87. 7. Springs are in him May 2. being the Lords day Many that had heard what the Lord had done for her soule came to see her and heard her in a humble sort with a low voice being very weak in body magnifie the Lord and his Grace to her soule To one then shee said as followeth which was presently writ O magnifie the Lord in my behalfe that daily compasseth me about with songs of deliverance I could not endure but that I see him that 's invisible I could not see him but that he saw me first and gave me faith He loved me and washed me in his bloud Rev. 1.5 He loved me before I was washed and because he loved me therefore he washed me He was tempted as we are He had no need to be tempted but to succour tempted ones such poore creatures as I. He takes delight to succour such poor soules It s our Fathers good pleasure to give us a Kingdome It s his good pleasure he delights in giving us a Kingdome Rom. 8. end Its neither height nor depth neither Principalities nor powers nor any other Creature that shall separate that soule that 's in union with him He hath bound the soule to himselfe with the cords of love and there shall be no separation from it May 3. In the morning one having spoken to her shee thus answered I am not onely fild with the Spirit but if one may say it drunk with the Spirit it overcomes me Alluding it seems to Eph. 5. 18. Be not drunk with wine but be fild with the Spirit or to Act. 2. 15-17 These are not drunk but the Spirit is powred out upon them One said to her Your enjoyments are more then of many Saints if theirs were put together in one Shee answered My sufferings have been more then of many Christ is faithfull in all he hath spoken he will not faile in one promise He saith as our sufferings abound so our Consolations abound a 2 Cor. 1. 5. There 's many Saints have lived threescore yeeres that have not suffered so much as I have done in one moneth The Lord was my Shield at my right hand therefore no hurt could come unto me Christ is in me the hope of glory b Col. 1. 27. The God of peace shall tread Satan under our feet shortly c Rom. 16.23 He shall doe it he hath done it I see it done Though he was strong that possessed this house a stronger then he hath dispossessed him and possessed it himselfe d Luk. 11. 21. None could doe it but himselfe it was too hard for men or Angels I am silent at the Goodnesse of God If I had the tongue of men and Angels I could not tell the terrors formerly nor my present enjoyments Many strangers good and bad came to see her amongst others there came one with Crochets and when she was silent vented some to others present at the hearing whereof shee was troubled and sweat and at last shee burst out saying Let them that have received Christ as the Truth is in Iesus speak of nothing but the freenesse of the love of God and of a full Christ to a nothing Creature and not of whimsies May 4. When M ris Langham Colonel Langhams wife with some other came to see her and spake to her desiring to heare of the dealings of God with her shee answered telling her of Gods abundant Goodnes to her to this effect Iesus Christ found me and loved me before I could love him He came to me in the most disconsolate condition that ever soule was in When I must either be delivered or be destroyed I could abide no longer then Christ came Christ is my life and my life is hid with Christ in God r Col. 3.3 1 Joh. 3. 2. And when Christ shall appeare I shall appeare with him in Glory How admirable is it that he should dye to give mee life He is to be admir'd in his Saints He came to give Faith to a faithlesse soule and to soften hard and unbeleeving hearts He brought such as were aliens and enemies s Col. 1. 21. to
be neer in himselfe and is not this to be admir'd He first finds the soule and then the Spouse saith Shee had found him whom her soule loveth He destroys selfe righteous selfe and all selfe that he alone might have the glory He leaves nothing for the Creature to boast in It s his Wisedome that he alone might have the Glory Turne thou me and I shall be turned Heale me and I shall be healed Convert me and I shall be converted So many soule hath found by experience One told her It s said a Ezek. 18. 31 32. Turne yee why will yee dye O house of Israel Shee answered It s Christ that comes with a power in the Word and turnes them And the Church knew her own unsufficiency to returne and therefore shee saith Turne me and I shall be turned b Jer. 31. 18. Behold he comes leaping over the mountaines and skipping over the hills He makes rough places plaine and raiseth up valleyes c Luk. 3. 3. It s easie for him to pardon mountainous sins multitudes of sins as one sin He came to me and pardon'd me though my sins were as the stars in Heaven for multitude He hath delivered me from the hard bondage wherein I was made to serve He appear'd to me in the dark and thick Cloud a thick Cloud indeed One beam of the Sun of righteousnesse dispeld it in a moment What a sinfull creature was I I never read of any that was in so desperate a condition as I And he hath delivered me from all my feares not from one or two but from all my feares Therefore I desire high and low rich and poore to magnifie the Lord and to praise his Name in my behalfe that he hath looked on the low and base estate of his handmaid His works praise him his Saints blesse him Ps. 145. 10. Especially the work of the New Creation in the soule I could beleeve nothing before but that there was no Hell but in this life I had no rest no rest in hearing nor reading and then he made me rest on himselfe d Mat. 11.28 And though I was weary and faint He was neither weary nor faint His wrath is but for a moment but of his goodnes and mercy there is no end He layes the foundation and he builds up It s I the Lord doe all He bare me and carried me and did at last deliver me This Rock followed me though I was not aware of him The Sun of righteousnesse arose with healing under his wings and the day-star arose in my heart e 2 Pet. 1. 19. It was a dark heart till he arose and then he made it light Christ suffered for me He needed not to suffer and be tempted but to succour such as mee that was tempted f Heb. 2. 18. I never had rest till I saw my selfe crucified with Christ g Gal. 2.20 and that my sins pierced him and there came out of his side a fountaine of bloud for the guilt of sin and not onely so but a fountaine of water to wash away the filth of sin to wash away all my filth There 's enough in him not onely to justifie but also to sanctifie h Joh. 5. 6. The life that I now live is by the faith of the Son of God who hath loved me and given himselfe for me though before I was an unbeleever and unholy and unthankfull and a murmurer and every way sinfull yet now hath he lov'd me and washed me And it not be to be prized and admir'd of all his Saints And his Name to be had in everlasting remembrance He proclaim'd his Name to be Mercifull and Gracious abundant in Goodnes and in Truth and that to sinners to the chiefe of sinners May 4. 1647. The same day at evening when some came to see her M r Iessey and M ris Palmer wife of the late Minister there in Lawrence Pountney who with M r Palmer had known her soule in affliction One telling her M ris Palmer was glad to heare of Gods goodnesse to her M ris Sarah said I desire that M r Palmer and you and all Gods people may praise and magnifie the Lord for his goodnes in looking down on the i* Lu. 1.48 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 so Mat. 23.12 base estate of his handmaid M ris Palmer said After what manner did your comforts come in to you M ris Sarah My earthly tongue cannot expresse what I felt it s beyond expression I was in such extremitie that either deliverance must come or I must perish I was able so bold no longer Then I fell into a Trance This was April 6. at night I lay in visions And in that time the Spirit of God was powr'd in upon mee And then Iesus Christ was presented to me as crucified for my sins I saw it and my selfe crucified with him and when I saw a glimpse of his love then I mourned bitterly for my sins and never truely sorrowed for sin till then I never mourn'd for sin as sin before But then I mourn'd bitterly k Zach. 12.10 And now praise the Lord with me and let us magnifie his Name together M ris Palmer Are you nod desirous to enjoy your inheritance M ris Sarah Yes But Christ hath taught mee by what I enjoy to submit to his will My terrors so long were nothing to one moment of mercies All the miseries I endured though they were very great were nothing to one glimpse of his mercy M ris Palmer How are your thoughts acted what are they acted upon M ris Sarah A living active Christ in a dead passive creature makes it act to God l Gal. 2. 20. For a farewell shee said Rejoyce in the Lord with me Mention was made before that from the 27 th of March to the 21. of April in those 24. dayes shee had not eaten at all and her drink had been onely two or three or four little cups of fair water once in two or three or in four dayes together Some having spoken of this others have counted it a forgery or pretence By such injections the Enemy would obscure and darken the Works of the Great God of Heaven But many Godly Ministers and Gracious Saints that know M ris Wight and the Maid and this Daughter of Abraham have ground to judge they truely feare the Lord and that they dare not lye but abhorre lying Now the Relator by conference with them hath it from their own mouths that from the time of her ceasing to be in Trances and to be deaf and blind which was April 19. to the day of the writing of this part of the Relation being May 5. shee hath not taken so much sustenance as shee did take in that time from March 27. to April 19. And from May 5. till Iune 11. being the longest day in the yeare lesse then that from April 19. The power of God appearing therein wonderfully to the beholders in upholding
her full 75 dayes without one crum of bread or meat and with so little drink Shee not being able to eat or to drink more then shee did but against her stomack When shee by urging yeelded to take somewhat shee could not keepe it but presently cast it up Shee never lov'd to drink strong waters nor strong drink from her infancy And when the Relator was told they could not get her to take of a Cordiall that was sent to her from a Lady that had been with her as they judged by the direction of D r Debote or of D r Worsley whom the Lady had lately sent to her he perswaded her to take of it and put it to her mouth But shee said Shee could not and said that the smell of it made her sick Which caused him to forbear further urging of her When lately one desired her if shee could to take some sustenance Shee answered I would if I could but I cannot it makes me sick to think of it Iesus Christ feeds me May 2. One asked her if shee would drinke M ris Sarah answered I cannot I have Iesus Christ I have enough he feeds mee with delights He not onely hath drops but he flows in of himselfe Shee was further urged to take somewhat M ris Sarah answered Shee desired not to be urged God hath given me food for my soule when my soule was well nigh starving for want of food but God hath given me Christ to feed upon and his flesh is meat indeed and his bloud drink indeed n Joh. 6. 55. God hath wrought a miracle in delivering my soule And if that he hath appointed life he will give me strength to take in the one as well as the other Now I am worse when I take it May 3. When shee was wish'd to drinke M ris Sarah answered I have wines well refined no dregs are in it It s pure that 's the purity of Christ. He gives me not cups full but he hath me into his wine-cellar o Can. 2.4 5. Old Transl. and fils me with flaggons May 4. M ris Palmer desired her that shee would take something to uphold her that shee might be an instrument of Gods glory that had done so much for her She answered What ever is for his glory he will enable me to doe it If it be his will that I should continue he will give me power to take in the Creature May 5. M ris Palmer came againe to her being very desirous to further her to eat or drink somewhat to nourish her Shee gave some such answer as is beforesaid M ris Palmer said What promise have you that any should live without food M ris Sarah presently answered Man lives not by bread onely but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God p Mat. 4. 4. M ris Palmer What 's meant by Word there M ris Sarah I think t is meant of Christ his love and mercy and goodnesse to poore sinners and that 's enough for any soule to live upon M ris Palmer answered It s enough for the soule but how shall the body doe M ris Sarah If it be the will of God that more of his power q 2 Cor. 12.9 shall be seen in sustaining me with so little his will is good Shee having said before that they saw that when shee took somewhat that it made her sick M ris Palmer asked her Doe your comforts remaine still as cleer and fresh as at first M ris Sarah answered Yes I have a standing River continually to drink of M ris Palmer ask'd Doe you sleep quietly without Dreames M ris Sarah answered I have dreames and sometimes I dreame of the free love of God towards me But once or twice I dreamed of the former terrors I was in and I trembled exceedingly and the bed shook under me exceedingly But I awaked and presently all was gone For he is unchangeable yesterday and to day and the same for ever r Heb. 13.8 This was May 5. 1647. At the former Conference with M ris Palmer the Relator was present and then writ Both the former and the latter M ris Palmer her selfe writ from whom the Relator had it and compared both together To another shee declared what torments shee had undergone for a moneth together before shee was forced to keep her bed which hath been ever since April 6. How shee walked in terror day and night what a Hell shee had in her Conscience and was tempted to beleeve there was neither God nor Devill neither Heaven nor Hell but what shee felt in her Conscience And therefore if shee were but out of this life there was an end of all her torments And hence shee sought to beat out her braines against the wall many times and thereby was bloudy and sweld And sought to cast her selfe down from steep places and got knives and other things to kill her selfe withall but was miraculously preserved because the Lord had a favour to her in her base estate But then shee thought If Christ should come in to her it was as if he should goe into a dunghill into a carraine That shee was tempted to blaspheme God and had much adoe to keep it in especially the last day of her souls affliction Wherein shee was very forcibly urged to blaspheme God and dye and so be out of her Torment which yet shee refused to speake it out till at last shee could no longer withhold but was even ready to utter forth that blasphemy and even then was her Tongue smit that shee could not speake Shee told moreover that shee usually every morning formerly was wont to read above twenty Chapters and so would have still'd her Temptations but was not a jot the better That shee could remember nothing of what shee had read but the judgements and they were laid open to her But all the promises were seal'd from me said shee One day I was tempted to throw my Bible into the fire and I threw it from me but it fell not into the fire But for this I was sore tormented that I would have throwne it into the fire Another time in my trouble I said what I was urged to say it was this If the Lord will not save me let him doe what he will with me Let him damne me But afterwards I was greatly terrified for it that I should bid him damne me And now shee saw the evill of yeelding to such Temptations shee thought to have had ease by yeelding but shee was the more terrified for her yeelding And yet the Lord magnified his mercy to her when shee thought that by such yeeldings God would surely damne her O the depths of Satans wiles and O the greater depths of the Goodnes of God! even so such seduced soules Shee further said That the same day wherein shee was forced to lye downe viz. April 6. shee was taken in all her body All was shaken and shee trembled exceedingly That her
hands were clinch'd up together and so were her feet as if it were by the Cramp and her mouth was drawn up as a purse and her eyes were with the eylids folded up and closed and her hearing was taken from her and shee had no motion nor desire of any good Mine own eyes said shee pittied not my selfe and just then was the time of love a Ezek. 16. 8. And then the Good Samaritane then Iesus Christ came and powr'd in wine and oyle when I had most need I may well shy He is a refuge b Psal. 46. 1. a very present help in time of Trouble May 7. Was another Conference between her and the Maid before mentioned April 24. which was at that present taken by the Relator M ris Sarah W. How doe you Have you not found him yet whom your soule loveth Maid told how long shee had been thus and yet was no beter and how sad her case was M ris Sarah I have been in as sad a condition ever since I was about nine yeers old And that daughter of Abraham whom Satan had bound loe those eightteene yeers c Luk. 13. 11. yet Christ healed Maid But he will destroy me M ris Sarah How dare you say so when Christ saith He came not to destroy d Luk. 9. 56. sinners but their sin but to save them such as you and I. Maid Hee 'l save them he hath chosen but I am none of them M ris Sarah Dare you enter into Gods secrets Who made you of his secret Counsell c Rom. 11. 34. Deut. 29. 29. Secrets belong to God Maid Aye but I would not hearken M ris Sarah It s neither in him that willeth nor in him that runneth but in God that sheweth mercy f Rom. 9. 16. Maid But I resisted when he would M ris Sarah Your time was not come for if his time had been to have come it s not all your power that could hinder his power Maid I put out the light and I walked contrary to his way M ris S. You were not in the light nor true way till you have Christ. He is the light c Jo. 1.9 the way Maid I can doe nothing as I should M ris S. If you had done all yet you might be but as the young man in the Gospel that said All this have I done Yet he wanted one thing So you want one thing the sealing of his love to your soule You must lye low before God It s Christ that both throws down Christ that raiseth up d 1 Sam. 2. 6. He did both to me Maid My heart is desperate M ris S. The heart of man is deceitfull above all things and is desperately wicked e Jer. 17.9 It s the depth f Ps. 130. 1. of misery cryes to the depth of mercy Maid I am blind and see not the depth M ris Sarah Your eyes are blind yet and Christ came to open the eyes of the blind not of them that see but that are blind g Luk. 4. 18. It s Christ must wash you with cleane water He must give it and he will work h Isa. 43. 13. and who shall let him Maid But I resisted and such must be willing M ris S. But that 's in the day of his power then they shall be willing i Ps. 110. 3. My body is weak to speak to you but my Spirit is willing k Mat. 26. 41. because he hath made it willing in the day of his power Maid I have gone many a weary step to get comfort but can get none M ris Sarah Christ was weary for you to sympathize with you The strong man possess'd me till Christ came who is stronger and dispossess'd him l Luk. 11. 21. And so will be do to you Maid I am in depths of misery M ris Sarah It s not depths of mercy that cals for depths of misery but its depths of misery cals for depths of mercy m Ps. 130. 1. Now God would root you and establish you and now Satan is most busie with you Maid I am puld up by the roots M ris Sarah Christ will root you out of your sin and root you out of your selfe and plant you in himselfe He will doe it Maid I saw God full of Glory in the firmament M ris Sarah He will make you and me to see him as he is and we shall be like him in Glory n 1 Joh. 3.2 Maid But I cannot beleeve M ris Sarah I lay in unbeliefe and could beleeue nothing but that there was no God and no Devill and no Hell till he made me beleeve in himselfe and the same power that did it for me the same will doe it for you for he is yesterday and to day and the same for euer o Heb. 13. 8. for he is unchangeable Maid I had a glimpse of God but I have backslidden from him M ris Sarah Say thus to God Turn me and I shall be turned the Lord saith I le heale your backslidings and love you freely p Hos. 14.4 I le love you though you have backslidden and heale your backslidings Maid He speaks it not to me M ris Sarah Why not to you when t is free to backsliders And he is found of them that sought him not q Isa. 65. 1. What can you say to this Maid That 's to one in the first work M ris Sarah It s in the first work and the second work too He takes pleasure to work both the will and the deed r Phil. 2. 13. Maid The Lord forewarnd me and I hearkened not to him and now he is gone M ris Sarah This is nothing but sin and Satan to hinder you from closing with the Scriptures that are set before you Say to God s Job 34.31 Hos. 14.2.4 Ps. 41.4 Heale me I have sinned Heale my backslidings Maid I am no better for saying it when I have no heart or Spirit to pray ☞ M ris S. Say it though you be no better because God bids you say it Say it and say it againe till he heale you It may be he will come in when you say it if you can but say it with your lips the everlasting arms of God can reach you when you cannot reach him his are everlasting armes He reach'd Ephraim are you more wild than he that was at a bullock unaccustom'd to the yoke Ephraim an untam'd heiser t Jer. 31. 18 19. that snuf'd up the wind Yet God tames him and he saith Turne thou me and I shall be turned Say you so to God M ris Sarah having still kept her bed from April 6 till this May 7 and neither eat nor drunk all this while but according to the proportion beforesaid and being very weak and faint the Maid was desired to forbear speaking any more then unto her and to come againe another time May 9. Being the Lords day after
both Sermons these came to see her M r and M ris Liggon the Relator M ris Dawson a Ministers widow M ris Berny of Norfolk and many others amongst which was a Gentlewoman in sad despair that hearing of her came to have speech with her and had The Relator writ then what was said after he came thither The Conference followeth Gentlewoman The Devill Rules in me M ris Sarah Christ will fetch you from him he will dispossesse him and possesse himselfe Gentle I am under sin M ris Sarah Shall sin separate from the love of Christ God hides himselfe from the house of Jacob though dear to him Shee speaking low one asked the Gentlewoman if shee did heare M ris Sarah O that you might heare a Joh. 5. 25. Eph. 4. 20 21. Christ speak to you Gentle I cannot beleeve I am justified for such are sanctified and so am not I. M ris Sarah You speak of sanctifying It s against the scope of the Scripture to put sanctifying before justifying You should beleeve that God justifieth the ungodly b Ro. 4.5 that 's for you to beleeve now and thence would arise your sanctification And that you cannot come to him except he draw you c Jo. 6.44 10.29 That all power is in his hand He is greater then all and none can pull you out of his hands Devils nor Angels nor sin can keep from him when he will draw you Gentlew. None knows my condition how desperate it is M ris Sarah The heart is deceitfull above all things and desperately wicked who can know it d Jer. 17. 9. He that hath Balme of e Jer. 8. 22. he and he alone can heale it None can wound the soule but himselfe and none can heale it but himselfe I found that everlasting armes were under me and kept me though I knew it not He taught Ephraim to goe though he wist it not f Hos. 11. 3. Gentlew. I am rebellious against him M ris Sarah He ascended and gaue gifts to men even to the rebellious g Ps. 68.18 The great gift he gives them is himselfe and from that great gift are all other gifts as all the streames are from the fountaine If thou knewest that gift of God thou wouldst aske it and he would give it h Joh. 4. 10. Shee had a vaile before her heart but he took it away and he gave her to aske shee could not aske till then I found that no other sin separates from Christ but unbeliefe and did he come to finde faith in earth in earthen hearts i Luk. 18. 8. there 's nothing but death and unbeliefe and envy and rebellion and all manner of evill till Christ came and he gaue faith to me he found it not Qu In what manner was his giving faith to you M ris Sarah At first I saw cleerly Christ crucified for my sins It was neither Judas nor Pilate nor Herod nor any other so much as my sins That he was the skape-goat that bare them all away into the Wildernesse of forgetfulnesse never to be remembred any more k Levit. 16.21 I cannot tell my misery how great it was and I cannot tell the mercy that a full Christ came to such an empty creature to such a one as I that was as Ephraim an untamed heiser unaccustomed to the yoke Then his Name was proclam'd to me that he was a Saviour to save sinners mercifull gracious long-suffering abounding in goodnesse and abounding in truth to fulfill all that mercy and goodnesse and he is the way to the Father Ah! that he should love such a one and marry such a one that was a murmurer disobedient unholy Such a one God was pleasd to make an object of mercy There 's an end of my misery though I thought there was no end of it but there 's no end of his mercy my misery was the misery of a creature but his mercy is the mercy of a God and there 's no end of it I was brought as low at the lowest hell The gates were open to receive me that then mercy should come to shut them that Christ came to fetch me out He is good and doth good not to them that are good but he makes good nor to fill them that are full but to fill them that are empty I le leave in them an afflicted and poore people and they shall trust in the Name of the Lord they that are afflicted and poore it s they shall trust in his name l Zeph. 3. 12. And what 's his Name but forgiving iniquity transgression and sin I made thee rest from thy hard bondage wherein thou wast made to serve hard bondage and made to serve this hard bondage m Isa. 14. 3. Yet God delivered when none els could In the first verse the LORD will have mercy on Jacob and will yet choose Israel I had no will nor no desire to him nothing but perversnesse and wretchednesse as in Israel I might speak and speak a long time dayes and weekes and moneths and not able to tell all my misery The Lord loved me and he chastend me as he saith to Laodicea As many as I love I rebuke and chasten n Rev. 3. 19. Gentlew. All afflictions are for good to them that love God but they bring me no good at all M ris Sarah I warrant you David could not say His afflictions were good for him when he said They are gone over my head my heart failes mee o Psal. 40. 12. But it was afterwards that he said It is good for me to be afflicted The Prodigall whilst he was in his sin and misery could not say it was best for him But how did his Father friends rejoyce afterwards p Luk. 15.32 I desire all the Saints might rejoyce as much for me as they did for him Christ came to seek and to save that that was lost I found it so I read God is good to them that are of a pure heart and I was troubled at it for mine was not pure q Psal. 73. 1. That heart is pure that he makes pure he finds it not pure but he makes it pure When I read I read the promises over and over but I could remember nothing of them but if I reade but a tittle of the judgements that remained with me I could remember the verse where they are At last the promises terrified me most of all because they were for others but not for me None could burst these brazen gates but Christ alone I was worse then a Beast Beasts praise God in their kinde But I dishonoured him But all this hindred not his love to me Would you love God first or would you have him love you first Gentlew. I doe not love him M ris Sarah We are by nature far from loving him wee are enemies to him God reconciles enemies q Rom. 5. 8-10 It s wee were enemies to God `not God an
Ordinances in hearing the word as formerly you did A. God will dispose me to that that shall be for his glory and my good But I look on Ordinances as tokens of Gods love to his people and representations of Christ that should neither be idolized nor slighted but they should be us'd and God lov'd above them To M r. Sp. shee said As the spouse in the Canticles sets out her beloved by similitudes of him so are Ordinances similitudes of him by which he sets out himselfe to us for our good If Iesus Christ himselfe should preach to the soule every day and give not out of himselfe the Ordinance would be empty to it But he comes in to his people in Ordinances and there he fils the empty soule with good things Lady Whether doe you not desire to live to declare the great mercy that God hath express'd to you A. I desire nothing but his will which doth order all things to his own glory and his Creatures good Lady whether have you thoughts of the Church of God and of the condition it is in in the parts that you know A. I wish with Paul if it were possible that all Israel might be sau'd M ris Bri. Doe you not wish that all differences were compos'd and made up among the Saints Answ. Yes Lady What meanes doe you thinke would be most effectuall to compose them A. The beholding a reconciled God seen by all God was in Christ reconciling the world to himselfe There is need of such a dayes-man as Christ to reconcile the world to God Suitable to what Mr. St. Marshall gathered from Isa. 57. 19. I create the fruit of the lips peace peace viz. 1. That the peace and the healing of Gods people is Gods own worke a worke of his creating power 2. Though it be so yet the speciall way whereby he effects it is the preaching of the Gospell of peace Her face being covered as daily It us'd to be since April 6 one spake of the great weaknes of her eyes Ans. Christ hath done a great miracle upon me he hath made the blind to see and the deafe to heare and the damb to speake he hath done it upon many and he hath done all upon one poore wretch Formerly her selfe was slow of speech that now hath such freedome speaking as with a new tongue M r Sp. Doe you think to have it alwayes day with you Ans. I know there may be clouds that the soule cannot so apprehend the light of Gods countenance at David said Restore to me the joy of thy salvation a Ps. 51. 12. and why hidest thou thy face from me But Christ the Sun of righteousnesse will arise againe b Mat. 42. He will break through all these things My times and my refreshings are in Gods hands c Ps. 31 15. to refresh the weary soule which he will doe freely M r Sp. I would be glad to heare which way the Lord came in to refresh you Ans. It was revealed to me that Christ was crucified for me even for me the chiefest of sinners I never had a glimpse of Christ before and then I admired him I saw it plainly My greatest sin was unbeliefe and I saw I was in unbeliefe and that the wrath of God abode upon me I was damned already And not for any thing in me but when unworthinesse was in me for his own worthinesse even for his own Names sake that he forgave all my sinnes His Name is Mercifull Gracious long suffering c Exo. 34 67 M r Sp. What counsell would you give to one in that condition of darknes A. To wait on God that hids himselfe Isa 8. 17. My temptations were the saddest of any to beleeve there was no God nor Heaven nor Hell but what I felt my soul remain'd in terror continually M r Sp. You knew the Scripturs before that comfort you now wherein then is your comfort What 's the difference A. The Letter did but kill it could not comfort but God hath refreshed me in his love God was the same to me in his love formerly that he is now But in his fulnes of time he manifested that which was before I doe not beleeve that he hated me before and loved me after but all my affliction was in his love and very faithfulnes The glory of God doth as much appeare in supporting a soule under terror as in delivering it out of terror It s said in Isai. 24. 16. Glorifie God in the fires Though the soule sees it not then yet when the Lord brings it out then he sees that God did glorifie himselfe in the afffliction Question What doe you think of the POWRINGS out of his spirit in the last dayes S. Ans. Then and since being put together The Name of Christ is powred forth by the spirit on his people and will be still and thereby we love him when he hath shewed that love to us and drawne us Question wee have some drops of his spirit now but are the powrings out now Act. 2.17.31 38. S. Ans. There are many that love him now and why doe they love him its not said because of some Drops but because thy name is Oyntment powred out Therefore it is that any soule loves him Cant. 1. 3. Quest. But doe you not think there will be a time when God will powre out more of his Spirit upon his sonnes and daughters then now is usuall S. Ans. Though his love is powred out into the hearts of his people by the spirit now or els we could not love him yet this is personall to a few but I doe verily beleeve it will be more generall to many and in a greater measure This is but a tast now of what shall be M r. Spr. Doe you take no food S. Ans. Yes I feed on Iesus Christ he is my daily food he feeds me with himselfe and hee is full of satisfaction Ioh. 6. 35. 51. 55. M. Spr. But I speake of bodily food Doe you think it s no temptation on you to forbeare bodily food S. Ans. No. I would eate if I could but I connot If I try it makes me worse His word is my meat and delight In my trouble I oft could not eat he fed me with bitternes and worme wood I sed on terror that was my meat and now the Lord makes answerable to it his feeding me now with promises this marrow and fatnes a Psal. 63. 5. he refresheth me continually with his love which is better then b Cant. 1. 2. wine May 21. One asked her Doe you sleep A. These three nights I slept not till three of the clocke but I lye still I stir not but am content and that 's better Quest. How is that better S. Ans. Content is better then abundance is it not And Christ is never idle he is alwayes doing somewhat in the soule One speaking of hopes of her life S. Ans. To be willing to live is the hardest lesson to
cōpisseth him about with lyes yet they were not destroyed for his bowels were turnd for Ephraim Hos. 11.8 Maid If I eat I am terrified for it S. If I did eat I was terrified for it Sometimes I durst not drink in a whole week together because I judged it was a Cup of Devils h 1 Cor. 10. 21. and I drank to Devils if I drank and if I did eat I thought I did eat my own damnation Maid I would fain be out of this life that I might have an end S. Would you be sooner in Hell Is not that worse Maid I would be sitting alone and musing and not work because I have no hope Quest. When you work not have you no thoughts Maid Yes thoughts of sin and of misery S. Then t is better for you to be imployed in busines i Rom. 12. 11. Forels the enemy hath more advantage And specially because God bids you labour the thing that is good k Eph. 4.28 Maid I shall never be comforted I am cast out S. Because thou sayest my paine is perpetuall my wound is incurable l Jer. 30. 15-17 and are called an Out-cast therefore the Lord will cure thee The Lord gathereth the out-casts of Israel Maid Once that promise was sweet to mee The mountains shall depart and the hills shall be removed but my kindnes shall not depart from thee nor shall the Covenant of my peace be removed saith the LORD that hath mercy on thee m Isa. 54.10 Then God was sweet to me and his people sweet I could have laid my hand under their feet But now mercy is departed and all is nothing S. Hath God said It shall not depart and will you say it shall depart Mountains of sin and corruption shall depart but he will not depart The Father draws the soule to his Son the Son receives it the Blessed Spirit unites it and makes of two one He knits the knot in the middle and ties these two ends together Christ and the soule which knot of love none can untie n 1 Joh. 5. 7. Maid God might say What could I have done more for thee then I have done o Isa. 5.4 and yet I have thus revolted from him S. Israel not onely revolted but deeply revolted Yet he saith Returne and he turns them He gathereth not onely Israel in generall but the Out-casts of Israel the skirts and rags of them I le tell you what your state is You are as a man that 's taken from his house where was some light and is put in Ludgate and put in a dungeon where he hath no light If one comes from the King with a pardon and to call such a one to the Kings Palace where the light is greater and more glorious then that he had before how will he then admire it And will not you admire it if the great King shall doe thus with you that are now in a dark dungeon If he work who shall let him his pleasure is to raise up one from a dungeon of darknes and to bring such to his marvailous light q 1 Pet. 2.9 From a dunghill from sin and corruption and the Devill to sit with Princes r Psal. 113.7,8 to give them a kingdome Fear not little flock s Luk. 12.32 it s your Fathers good pleasure to give you a kingdome Maid If I were of that flock I might have hope S. Other sheep I have that are not of this fold them will I bring to the Sheepsold and they shall hear my voice and there shall be one fold and one Shepheard t Joh. 10. 16. Maid The Lord strove with mee and I resisted S. If the Lord passe over all this your soule and body will melt you will be overcome with this goodnesse of his to be his for ever It s the Son that must make you free and then you shall be free indeed u Joh. 8.36 Maid But I have fin'd against such great light and what will my end be S. What think you of Peter that so denied Christ Was not be on the mountaine with Christ and saw his glory w Mar. 9. 2. did not he see light yet how sin'd he against it when be both denied Christ and forsware him x Chap. 14. 71. And yet what love shewd Christ to him after all this Tell my Disciples and tell Peter that I am risen y Chap. 16. 7. 9. I was much troubled with the Parable of the foolish Virgins It was terrible to me But yet see what was there At midnight there was a great cry Behold the Bridegroome cometh go forth to meet him z Mat. 25. 6. So when it is the darkest time with you you are cald to goe forth to meet him Maid I think as I go in the streets something will fall on my head and will kill me S. When I went in the streets I thought the Earth would open and swallow me up You cannot reckon up the thing but I was troubled with it Maid I desire I might be a warning to all to beware by my example of sinning against light as I have done brought all this misery on me S. It may be this is it the Lord aimes at in his hiding himself from you that you may be for a warning yet he may return to you again a 1 Tim. 1 13-16 Maid If I had hearkened then my peace should have been as a river and my righteousness should goe before me S. Be you ashamed and confounded that you have so neglected him and if he will shew his love to you notwithstanding all this how will you admire him Maid Ay as much as any I should have as much cause to admire him as ever had any A. Therefore he will be gracious that he may be exalted b Isa. 30. 18. Maid If I could weep day and night I should find more ease but I cannot S. What if you could yet the Law and all your doings are weak a Rom. 8. 3. but you have not what you would in your self that you may not rest short of Christ. You would not else so desire the riches of Grace to such a one Are you not weary and sorrowfull Maid I am S. He will satiate the weary soul and he will replenish the sorrowfull soul. b Jer. 31. 25. The maid having further heard by this Gentlewoman how sad her condition had been and that yet the Lord had been so gracious to her she said Mine was not sadder then yours hath been but only that I had sin'd against greater light How long were you in that sad condition S. Four years and above since I was little more then eleven years old But the last half yeere and above before the Lord delivered me I was full of terror night and day and at last I had no rest at all being violently tempted against my life Maid Then I may have some hope that the Lord may deliver me
What will thou have me to doe It was answered as that to Paul Act. 22. 10. Arise and go into Damascus and there it shall be told thee what thou shalt do So it was given her to understand that shee must arise from that sinfull condition and goe out of her selfe to Christ and he would tell her what shee must doe And as he said to Paul Act. 26. 16. Rise and stand upon thy feet For I have appeared to thee for this purpose to be a Minister and a witnes both of the things thou hast seen and in which I will appeare unto thee So God had bid her Arise and he had raised her soul from the lowest hell and now he perswaded her that he will raise up her body also that she might be a Witnesse of the Grace of God to minister to others what he had administred unto her And that as Paul should be a witnes both of the sufferings of Christ for him and of his own sufferings for the Name of Christ So shee should be a witnes of both in like manner and set to her seale that God is true in whatsoever he hath spoken and cannot deny himselfe And as Paul when he was to live and to suffer many things He said None of these things move me neither count I my life deare unto my selfe so that I may finish my course with joy and the Ministery Act. 20. 24. So she must not count her life dear to her self no not her being with Christ which is far better then this life being confident that shee should finish her course with joy and now shee must testifie and minister that Grace of God that shee had received unto others Other places of ministring to others were brought into her besides that of Paul Another was of Peters wives Mother Mark 1. 30. Anon they tell Iesus of her and he came and took her by the hand and lift her up and immediately the feaver left her and shee ministred unto them Not to Christ onely but to others And so must shee As Christ himselfe came not to be ministred unto but to minister Mark 10. 45. A Third place was Luk. 5. 20. 25. where Christ said to the man that was sick of the Palsey Man thy sins are forgiven thee There he first cured the soule and then the body saying Arise and take up thy Couch And he arose and went and glorified God declaring to others what God had done for him And so must shee Besides those three or foure places of ministring to others there were six places more brought to her of such as Iesus Christ raised up by his power and they were set on with power on her soule One was Luk. 7. 14. Christ said to the Widows son Young man I say to thee Arise and he that was dead sate up and began to speak Yet shee desired if shee might have a place to her more particular Then was given in that in Luk 8. end where Christ said Maid arise And after that a third place Mark 10. 49. It was said to the blind man by Christs Disciples Be of good comfort rise He calleth thee He called that won'd make him whole every whit This was suitable to her whose eyes were so weak and dim A fourth place Act. 9. 34. Peter said to AEneas Iesus Christ maketh thee whole and he arose immediately A fift place was Act. 3.6 In the * So Name is put for power there Act. 4.7.10 Name of Iesus Christ of Nazareth arise and walk and he arose immediately and leaped and praised God So thou in the * So Name is put for power there Act. 4.7.10 power and efficacy of the power of Iesus Christ of Nazareth arise and walk Iesus Christ maketh thee whole Then had shee Faith given her and Power instantly that shee could arise but her Mother being asleep in the bed with her shee forbare till her Mother did awake in the morning Yet there came one place more more full more particular and more familiar Mark 5. end Talitha cumi Damsell I say to thee Arise and straightway shee arose and walked And he commanded that somewhat should be given her to eate Here was her Eating Arising Walking And a full perswasion was given her therewith that so it should be with her selfe Thus shee lay fully confirm'd therein not sleeping that night at all but enjoying sweet communion with God till the morning And Iune 11. when her Mother awoke and was arising shee spake to her with teares in her eyes being grieved that through that foresaid pensivenes shee had not spoken a word to her Mother and thereby might offend her entreating her pardon which was sooner granted then asked Then shee declared what sweet refreshings the Lord had given in that night with power to her soule in behalfe of her bodies restoring and named the severall places beforesaid the Chapter and verse as they were given in to her that night so as they never had been given in to her in all her life before desiring the Maid that tended her to turne to the Scriptures one by one which shee did and read them to the last Shee declaring what power came with the words into her the last place being Damsell I say to thee Arise and he commanded that somewhat should be given to her to eate So now shee desired they would give her somewhat to EAT It being demanded what Shee would they should give her some broiled fish Which was a strange expression to them from her that had not eat a crumme of bread or other meat in 76. dayes nor so much as wet her lips for the last four or five dayes But shee speaking with such power and evidence they beleeved Fish was got and broild and brought to her and shee with joy in the Lord did eat of it heartily before them And said Shee did eat it because Iesus Christ had sweetened it before Therefore she said shee found as much savour and satisfaction and delight in it as if shee had all the dainties and delights in the world in one So was this unto her Having eaten and been refreshed and blessed the Lord not finding the least distemper or inconvenience at all thereby Then shee called for her cloaths who had not been able to arise no nor to hold up her head any while in the bed since the sixt of Aprill to this 11 th of Iune being 66. days Her cloaths being given her shee put them on and arose and stood on her feet and sate down in the Chamber joyfull in the Lord receiving no hurt thereby When shee cald for the Fish as shee said shee had this apprehension cast into her Thou hast fasted long thou shalt fast no longer it was but to make my power known to the sons of men what I have done and what I can doe 2 Cor. 12.9 Thus the Lord gave a prolonging of her life by Faith in the Name of Iesus Christ of Nazareth Thus by faith shee did Eat
and Arise and beleeved she should Walk also The two former shee did that instant Iune 11. The third was reserv'd to try her and others till the Lord should see fittest About the same time of Iune beforesaid the Relator heard of one H. T. that then had great enjoyments of God and could not take in a crumme or sip of the creatures for full six dayes together yet being in bodily health It being beleeved by many good people the Relator desired to speak with the party who is of approved godlines and did and was certified thereby of the truth thereof viz. from Iun. 9. the end till the beginning of Iun. 16. 1647. And that both in that time and before the Lord had given in severall discoveries of things to come Some particulars whereof were then related viz. Iun. 19. It seemed strange to him Yet he durst not then reject it being related in a tender modest manner exalting God therein Since this he hath recalled 1. That it s no where said in Scripture that Prophecy or Miracles or Knowledge are ceased 2. That M r Fox in the Book of Martyrs cites many Miracles wrought and Prophecies uttered both in the first hundred of yeeres after the Apostles and in the second third fourth fifth and so on to his time The like do Eusebius Socrates and other Ecclesiasticall approved Authors unto their times M r Fox cites Prophecies of late times revealed to Iohn Hus to Martin Luther yea and to himselfe Besides other experiences he hath known of 3. He hath weighed severall Scriptures that seem to hold out such things as Iob. 16. 8. 13. I will send the Comforter and he shall convince of sin of righteousnesse c. And he will shew you things to come and Act. 11. 28. Act. 21. 11. 9. Agabus and Philips daughters prophecied Act. 2. 13. 16 17. 33. 38 39. with Iob. 7.38 1 Cor. 12.8 10. 28. 31. 1 Cor. 14.1 c. Hence he feared to judge or speak ill of what he knew not and had no experience of in himselfe But rather judged he should try the Spirits whether they are of God because false Prophets are in the world 1 Joh. 4. 1. Rev. 2. 2. And should admire the Lord in his grace to worthles wormes and should pray for the accomplishment of the aforesaid Scriptures as the Disciples prayed thus Now Lord behold their threatnings and grant to thy servants that with all boldnes they may speak thy word the meanes thereof followeth by stretching forth thy hand to heal and that signes and wonders may be done by the Name or power of thy holy childe Iesus Act. 4. 29 30. Luk. 17. 5 6. To return M ris Sarah Wight arose from bed and sate up daily from Iune 11. till the 25. being Midsommer quarter day Yet shee remained weak Her Mother and her selfe before Iun. 25 desired that such as had sought the Lord for her might solemnly Praise the Lord with her for so answering prayer for her soule and body It was concluded to be Iun. 26. When behold the Lord gives in the third mercy before beleeved and hoped for the very day foregoing it that their mouths might be the more fild with the High Praises of God for this addition viz. that by Faith shee was strengthened as before to eat and to Arise so now to WALK And thus it was as her selfe related it the same day viz. Iun. 25. 1647. The night before it shee was very ill till about two in the morning Then was it hinted into her spirit that formerly the Lord had promised to her that shee should Arise and Walk and eat And as he had performed two of them in causing her to ARISE and to EAT so now he was to fulfill the Other in causing her to WALK Then severall Scriptures were brought in to her with life and power amongst others these Act. 3. 6. Peter said to the Criple In the Name of Iesus Christ of Nazareth arise and walk and immediately he received strength and stood and walked and praised God Another was Iob. 5. 8. Iesus said to the man at the Pool Rise and walk and immediately the man was made whole and walked Another was Dan. 10. 17-19 When Daniel was weak one from God touched him and said O man greatly beloved feare not Peace be unto thee Be strong yea be strong He was weak in Spirit and in body and here it is twice said Be strong and now he was strengthened in body as well as in spirit and he said Let my Lord speak for thou hast strengthened me Another place was Cantic 2. 10 11. Rise up my love my faire one and come away For the winter is past With this Paraphrase The winter of afflictions and temptations is past and the summer of joy and consolation is come and the Sunne of righteousnesse is risen which makes it a summer indeed The last place hinted in was Ephes. 3. 16. That he would grant according to the riches of his Glory to be strengthened with might by his Spirit in the inner man This said shee in relating it in the morning was spoke to me and I did beleeve it was so absolutely And as Daniel was strengthened immediately So was I strengthened immediately and was vile and would be more vile in mine own eyes that the Lord alone may be exalted Thus shee told her Mother and another Christian friend and said shee had received strength Having declared this with joy in the Lord in the morning Iun. 25 being Midsummer day 1647. then shee her selfe opened her head and scombed it which shee durst not suffer to be done the day before no nor for about twenty-four weeks before because it was so exceeding weak and ill through her so beating it in her former terror that shee feared it would not hold well together if it were opened and of late shee had not bodily strength to do it till that morning And now having dressed it shee neither fainted nor got cold thereby but desiring her Mother with the Maid to call on the Lord who is worthy to be praised shee got up immediately and stood on her feet and WALKED Praising the Lord. Shee not having walked nor had so much bodily strength in fourscore dayes before namely not since that sixt of Aprill beforesaid Thus the Lord the more fitted her for rendring Praise to his Name the day following And hereby he gave in to her friends greater encouragement and the more occasion of High Praises to our God Iun. 26. the day appointed thereto being come there met together M r Barker Minister in Garlick hill London and the Relator M r Sprig M r Brag and M r Isaac Knight lately of Holland with many other Christian friends to magnifie the Lord with them It was a sweet and joyfull day to many there assembled Much of God was seen therein The Party walked down from an upper to a middle-roome the place prepared for the dutie shee being veiled the Lord having made her
the more low in her own eyes and having the more melted and humbled her soul by the greatnes of his goodnes towards such an one which frame the Lord continue to the end The Occasion of the meeting was declared Many of the most materiall of the former passages of the Lords speciall providence being related in a way to exalt the LORD alone and not a worthlesse Creature Praises were then rendred to the Name of the Lord which is exculted * Neh. 9. 5. above all blessing and Praise In speciall with respect to this mercy to soule and body and to the Glorious Attributes of God manifested herein Some Instructions were also given for some direction and furtherance herein both to the Party her selfe and to her Mother and to all present Amongst others some from 2 Chron. 32. 25. But Hezekiah rendred not againe according to the benefit done unto him for his heart was lifted up therefore there was wrath upon him Whence was observed 1. That the mercies of God require rendrings unto God rendring the glory thereof to him 2. That the measure of rendring back that the Lord looks should be endeavoured is according to the benefit done to them 3. That all neglect of thanks or rendring againe springs from pride or the lifting up of the heart that 's the root 4. That the Lords choice servants are very subject the fearefull sinnes of pride and unthankefulnesse 5. That the wrath of God is against pride and unthankefulnes The Lord takes it heavily when his people walk proudly or unthankfully The first was then insisted upon which being opened confirmed and applied and Praises further rendred with prayer suitable there was then a time of bodily refreshing in a cheerfull manner after the middle of the day eating and drinking of what was sweet and pleasant a Neh. 8. 10. that it might not be as a day of Fasting b Joel 2.12 14. This was but short and moderate that it might be no hinderance but rather a furtherance to the main work then intended Having eaten and blessed the Lord further Instructions were given from the words of our Lord Jesus to his owne Disciples in Luke 10.20 In this rejoyce not that the Spirits are made subject to you but rather rejoyce that your Names are written in Heaven Where is held out to us 1. That evil Spirits have been made subject to Christ Disciples and so they shall be c Mar. 16. 17. d 1 Cor. 6. 3. 2. That the Prime cause of rejoycing is that one knows his Name is written in Heaven He is known there what he is he is of esteem there hee hath interest there and happinesse there 3. That even the Disciples of Iesus Christ are prone to be carnall or fleshly in rejoycing and not so spirituall as is meet Praises with prayer again and again being rendred in the Name of Jesus Christ and those for whom nothing is prepared beeing remembred Neh. 8. 10. and Conclusion being made the Assembly in convenient time was dismissed many being greatly refreshed in the Lord who had thus exalted his great and glorious Name in causing LIGHT thus to shine out of DARKNES restoring her soul from so deep despair and thus wonderfully raising up her body that had been long to the eye of reason ready to see corruption And as her Brother M r Ionathan Vaughan before her sowls enlargement had writ from Oxford confidently that Iesus Christ would deliver her as is touched before in pag. 5. So he having been brought to London by a good providence just at that time to see it done as pag. 25. and 29. when he was returned to Oxford before the end of April 1647. He writ thence That he made no doubt but the Lord would restore her body also to its perfect health though then it drew not to death His words were these Most dear Mother I am constrained to confess with thankfulnesse that it was an Almighty Providence indulgent to me which brought me home to you in a most seasonable and acceptable time in which have both heard and seen the goings forth of the Love towards my choice and precious Sister to be in love mercy and peace The strong man is dispossessed by stronger Christ the hope of Glory now reigning in her I make no doubt but the Great Physician the good Samaritan who hath poured out into her wounded Conscience his wine and oyle will restore her body to its perfect health whereby shee may be able in the land of the living to declare the Riches of the free Grace and love of God to poor sinners I came safe to Oxford I praise God c. Iune 30 being the Monethly Fast-day she went to Great Alhallows London it being neer Lawrence Pountney and heard Mr Io. Simpson there hee having known her soul in adversity was desired to have helped there in the Day of Praises but was hindered by his Preaching that day elsewhere M r. Prime the Minister of Lawrence Pountney had an impediment that hindered him also where he was desired After the Fast-days Sermons were ended her heart was drawn out to goe to two women that were in deepe despaire for refreshing them by the comforts she had received being greatly affected with their sad conditions And the day following being Iuly 1. she so went to another woman in like condition one of the former women and this having been with her severall times of late since her soul was comforted By speaking much to them and by going so farre about a mile to and fro this day and about as farre the day before shee was much wearied and spont so that her body was in some weaknesse for some dayes after And this was the more encreased by the resortings to her daily of many in London who would draw out expressions from her to her further spending of her small strength Hence that shee might bee the more retired and recover strength for further service among the little ones that are afflicted c. her tender Mother hath procured for her a place in the Countrey neer a friend there a few miles distant from London The LORD hath given her to enjoy much of himself in the City as much may he give hath he given her in the Countrey We cannot leave her better then in these enjoyments which are a Christians ALL IN ALL. Before that her retire into the Conntrey the night before Iuly 4. which was the First day of the week called the Lords day it being but three dayes before her removall into the Countrey shee had a Dream or Vision which left so deep an impression on her Spirit that after she arose she wrote it down and related it to her Mother and to the Maid by whom the Relator hearing of it asked her about it and desired to see the writing The substance of it was this On Saturday-night last I was in a Dream in great terror and so quaked that the bed did shake under me I
handmaid for divers yeeres and was no small occasion of trouble to the said superior afterwards 2. Branch The like Caution it may be also to all Inferiours to wives to children to servants flock and subjects against fearing man that shall dye more then the living God and obeying man rather then God by doing speaking or acting of any thing to please men that the word or conscience shew to be displeasing to God Lest for your so doing your terrors and punishment may be as great or greater then those of this hand-maid for the like offence Yea lest God tear you in pieces and there be none to deliver you Psal. 50.22 and lest both you and your Commander repent when it is too late I heard of a Maid in Suffolk whose Parents feared she should grow too pure and precise and on a Lords day evening the Mother bid her do some work which she judging unlawfull or at least doubting of entreated to be spared in it but her Father threatning to beat her she did it and the next morning she kept her bed and so did shee many weeks together upon it being terrified in Conscience for her preferring man before God being unfit for work it repented her Parents and her self too too late I never could hear that she got any comfort Also a young Gentleman being a scholar of whose deep despairing of ever being saved and of his strong perswasion that he should be damned Master Case Master Whitakers Master Chr. Love and the Relator with many other Preachers and Christians had notice and sad observation His Father a Gentleman in the Countrey brought him up to London to procure some to speak to him and to pray for him having him present with them This Christian duty was solemnly performed by those before-named and by others in several solemn daies of Fasting and Prayer The beginning and chief first moving cause of those so sad perswasions was because of the Oaths and Subscriptions imposed by the Governours in the Vniversity which he submitted to with the multitude that stuck not at them though he had his Conscience warning him yet thus doubtingly or against his Conscience he yeilded to the Ordinances of his Superiours But his thus doing brought great sorrow on his own soul and on his Parents and friends that sympathized with him Amongst others the Relator could more sympathize herein then many others in regard himselfe had been much afflicted in Spirit for his Vniversity Oaths and Subscriptions and yet had found though his sin abounded therein it being done with a staggering or worse with a relucting Conscience yet the n Rom. 5. 20. Grace of God had the more abounded and been magnified towards him in manifesting that he had forgiven so soul and hainous sins After all meanes used with this young Gentleman many severall daies he returned home more wounded and terrified because so many had taken so much pains with him and he was no whit better and therefore far the worse in his account as he shew'd after his returne home in many sad Letters in black lines to the Relator and because he could write no other language but the language of hell as he said he therefore would cease to weary him with it And so he ceased writing And although since that time the Lord hath given him hopes of his love in pardoning his sins and transgressions yet these sad examples and many moe of like nature that might be produced may suffice for a Warning to Heads and Governours in Vniversities and Corporations and to all Magistrates Officers Masters Husbands and Parents all Superiours whatsoever to beware of laying on heavie burdens by o Seeing OATHS should be given and taken onely in such cases and in such ritae and forme as is warranted by the word of God viz. in truth righteousness and judgement Ier. 4 2. Revel 10. 5 6 Oaths Subscriptions or Commands on any persons whose Consciences when they are distressed they are never able to relieve or release from Hellish continual fears and torments Psal. 50. 22. Matth. 27.3 4. To be an end ef all strife Hebrewes 6. 16. Because of Oaths so frequent not warranted this land mourneth Ier. 23. 10 Oh that Reformamation were herein as in all things else And for all Persons to keep the heart and Conscience above a Prov. 4.23 Hebrew Luk. 12.4 5 Act. 5.29 Luk. 14.26 27. 2 Tim. 4 12 13. Heb. 10.26 27. all keeping Fearing God above all Fiftly Learn hence to fly Censuring the most vile and desperate of all sinners Say not they and Reprobates though they are damn'd already in their own perswasion as this Party was So was M ris Honywood M ris Drake c. and yet obtained mercie Sixtly Be not weary therefore of using all good means for help to such as are hopeless and desparate as these parties were The Lord may come in the last hour He is not weary nor b Isa. 40.28 faint in seeking your good daily However your c 1 Cor. 15. 58. labour of love is accepted of the Lord. Seventhly Limit not the Holy One of Israel any outward means whatsoever seeing he gave the Party Faith and glorious joy in himself when she was struck deaf and blind that till that deafness was as one in hell already But rather believe the Proverb Jehovah ijreh Iehovah will be seen in the Mount d Gen. 22. 14. Eightly Exalt the Lord the Creator e Isa. 2. 11. Psal 8.1.2 Act. 3. 12. alone and not the Creature Say not What a one is shee But What a f Mic. â— 18 God is he in all reading and speaking of her or to her For the Lord is jealous of his glory and will not g Isa. 42.8 give it to an image of him Ninthly Behold here what 's the most effectuall means of humbling the heart and melting it and of furthering faith and love and what 's the greatest support and comfort in the greatest troubles and burdens about sin namely the discovery of the abundant h Eph. 2.4 Rom. 4.5 Grace of God in justifying the ungodly in giving his own Son to reconcile i Ro. 5. 6. 10 Isa. 53.5 enemies and the love k Eph. 3.19 Eph. 5.25 Ezek. 16.6 â—2 of Christ whilst we were in our sins and had nothing in us that is lovely that yet he so loved us as that he gave himself for us Tenthly and lastly Let all such as read or heare these wonderfull dealings of the Lord herein Consider how it is with their own soules First If the Lord hath sealed thee by his Spirit to the day of Redemption in the Spirit magnifie God and feed on him and on his Sons love daily in the Gospel promises and priviledges And the more thou hast received be the more humble l 1 Cor. 4.7 and thankfull to God and serviceable to him in m Is. 116.12 the Power of his Son and the more pittifull and tender to others n Tit. 3.2 â— considering thy self o Gal. 6.1 Secondly If thou hast no experience of such kinde of speakings of the Spirit to thee or of such maner or measure of Faith as here is mentioned both of which the Relator wanting waits for 1. Do not decry or cry down what thou knowest not a. Envy not others 3. Be not dejected because more is given to others then to thee But blesse the Lord in his various dispensations that best knoweth what kinde and measure is meetest for all Mat. 25.15 Eph. 4.7 16.4 Pray for more pourings out of his Spirit upon his sons and daughters as he hath promised to do in the last dayes Act. 2. 17. 33.38 39 John 7.38 39. Thirdly If thou art of a sorrowfull spirit by reason of sin fearing because it is so and so with thee that there never was an effectuall work upon thy heart finding such a power of sinne and corruption such dulnes coldnes hardnes of heart lazines filthines pride self-ishnes or the like basenesse Doth not thou so much backward in toiling to make out the former worke and still questioning about it and how bad thou hast been and art since as forward at that abundant GRACE herein magnified and ADVANCED to them that yet are a far off without God ungodly enemies to him to unfitted unprepared ones to the CHIEFEST OF SINNERS Fourthly If thou hast desires after full enjoyment of Jesus Christ and some hopes that he is thine but no assurance of it Blesse the Lord and be thankful to him that hath done so much for thee that did more desire sin and vanity But rest not in such desires but seek and presse hard for assurance And lastly If thou hast long sought and waited for assurance that Christ is thine and yet hast not attain'd it 1. Beware of murmuring and quarrelling against God and by this Example seeing how grieve to her son her murmuring hath been 2. Despair not because she obtain'd mercy that was so deep in that sin 3. Wait humbly and patiently on the Lord that hides himself that thou maist still seek and the more prize his mercy when at last he shal manifest it to thy soule For therefore will the LORD wait that hee may be gracious to you and therefore will hee bee exalted that hee may have mercy upon you For the LORD is a God of judgement BLESSED are all they that wait for him Isa. 30.18 A power to wait is also from him that bids you wait and promiseth that they that murmured shall learn doctrine Isa. 29.24 And to put his law in our heart Heb. 8.10 Namely to enable us to what hee commands us THE GOD OF ALL GRACE perfect the good work he hath begun in thee Phil. 1.6 To him be all glory by Christ Jesus * Greek to the age of ages Eph. 3.21 AMEN From July 7. till the end of Septemb. 1647. she remained at High-gate hoping then to returne to LONDON having eaten no bread nor flesh at all since March last and but very little of any other sustenance through the weaknesse of her stomach and yet looks as well as formerly At the writing hereof in this second Edition September 27 1647. H. J. FINIS