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A46934 The pleasant conceits of Old Hobson the merry Londoner Full of humorous discourses, and witt[y] merryments, whereat the quickest wits may laugh, and the wiser sort take pleasure. Johnson, Richard, 1573-1659? 1649 (1649) Wing J809A; ESTC R216319 20,832 52

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To the right Worshipfull Sir William Stone Knight Mercer to the Queenes most excellent Majestie YOur friendly disposition right Worshipfull giving grace to the well meaning mindes hath edboldened me amongst others to testifie that good will in outward shew which my heart of long time hath secretly bore to your Worship and now taking opportunity I present to your fovourable censure this small book containing many quick flashes of the witty jests of old Hobson the merry Londoner lately a Citizen of good estimation And I thinke not altogether forgotten of your Worship Receive this little Treatise I beseech you with favour answerable to my good will as your leasure shall serve bestow now and then a little reading thereof which if it please you to doe I doubt not but you will like well of the labour and besides the honest recreation which it offordeth apply what your worship maketh choise of unto your private pleasure and this wishing your prosperity acceptance to this my gift and opinion of the giver I conclude hoping that my honest wish shall not be yoid of a happy successe Your worships most humbly to command Richard Johnson THE Pleasant life of old Hobson the merry Londoner full of humerous discourses and witty merriments whereat the quickest wits may laugh and the wiser sort take pleasure Of Master Hobsons description IN the beginning of Quéene E●izabeths most happy Reigne our late deceased Soveraigne under whose peacefull government long flourished this our Country of England there lived in the Citie of London a merry Citizen named old Hob●o● a Haberdasher of smale wares dwelling at the lower end of Cheape-side in the Poultry as well known through this part of England as a Sergeant knowes the Counter gate he was a homely plaine man most commonly wearing a buttoned Cap close to his eares a short Gowne girt about his midle and a paire of slippers upon his féete of an ancient fashion as for his wealth it was answerable to the better sort of our Citizens but of so merry a disposition that his equall therein is hardly to be found hereat let the pleasant disposed people laugh and the more graver in carriage take no exceptions for here are meriments without hurt and humorous jests savouring upon wisedome reade willingly but scoffe not spightfully for old Hobson spent his dayes merrily 2. Of Master Hobsons proverbs NOt many years since there was Sir John Baynes by the commmon voice of the City chosen Sheriffe of London which man in former times had been Mr. Hobsons Prentise and riding along the streets with other Aldermen about the Citie business was saluted by M. Hobson in this manner Bones a me man what a clock horse-knave and thy Master a foot here 's the world turn'd upside down Sir John hearing this his Masters merry salutation passed along with a pleasant smile making no answer at all upon which slight regard M. Hobson took accasion to say as followeth here 's pride rides on horseback whilest humility goes a foot in speaking these words came foure other Aldermen riding after Master Sheriffe whose names were these Alderman Ramsey Alderman Bond Alderman Beecher and Alderman Cooper at whose passage by he made this pleasant rime 1 Ramsey the rich 2. Bond the stout 3. Beecher the gentleman 4. Cooper the ●out This pleasant Rime so sodainly spoken by M. Hobson is to this day accounted for his Proverbe in London 3. Of M. Hobson and John Tawny-coat MAster Hobson being a Haberdasher of small wares as I said before and his shop on a time full of customers his negligent prentises ●ar les●y credited a Kentish Pedler with 10. pounds of commodities neither knowing his name nor his dwelling place which oversight when M. Hobson understood and noting the simplicyty of his servants and their forgetfulnesse demanded what apparell the fellow had on marry Sir quoth one of the Prentises he had a Tawny-coate then quoth M. Hobson put down Jo●n Tawney-coate and so was the Pedler by the name of John Tawny-coate entred to the booke about a moneth after the same Pedler came againe to London to buy ware and comming to M. Hobson in a Russet coat willed him to turne over his booke for ten pounds that one John Rowlands owed him Ten pounds qd M. Hobson that John Rowlands oweth me I remember no such man bones a good knave thou owest me none But I do said the Pedler whereupon the book was searched but no John Rowlands was to be found I thinke thou art mad quoth Hobson for thou owest me nothing but I doe quoth the Pedler and will pay it Being in this strife a long time one of his servants said that he had found in the book such a debt by one John Tawny-coat That is my selfe replyed the Pedler I was then John Tawnycoat though I am now John Russet-coat so paid he ten pounds by the same name to M. Hobson and received twentie more upon his own word and name of John Rowlands the which twentie pound he shortly after paid for suretyship and so by his over-kind heart paying other mens debts he grew so poore and into such necessity that he was forced to maintaine his living by hedging and ditching and other such like countrey labours within a while after this M. Hobson comming into Kent to séeke up some desperate debts he came to Datford where finding this poore man ditching for a Groat a day in pitty of him said how now John Tawny-coat bones a God man thou canst never pay with this poore labour come home knave come home I will trust thée with twentie pounds more follow thy old trade of pedling againe and one day thou mayst pay me all Thus the Pedler had new credit of M Hobson by which good meanes he grew rich that in time he bought his fréedome of London and therein grew so wealthy a Citizen that he became one of the Masters of the Hospitall and when he dyed he proved a good benefactor to the same house 4. How Master Hobson called the Lord Maior of London knave by craft MAster Hobson in his youthfull time having nothing to dinner on a day but bread and chéese good béere and a red herring and being merrily disposed to iest came unto his doore to sit where he said to a Sergeant of London I have din'd this day quoth he as well as my Lord Maior the Sergeant hearing this and being a pick-thanke companion went and certified his Lordship thereof who immediately sent for M. Hobson being then a man but of meane estate who no sooner being come into his presence but his Lordship would needs know the cause of his comparison clapping twenty knaves on poore Hobsons shoulders I mean not Sergeants but knaves of my Lord Maiors own making I will teach thee knave quoth his Lordship how to use my name in thy comparison● and not in thy beggerly dinners and drunken banquets to compare with me and whilest you live to except me in any thing and