that it is against the law of God and the first institution of mariage that a contract should bee made betweene such persons whereof the one is formerly betrothed to another For so long as the first promise stands in force the man can no more be betrothed to two women then he may be the husband of two wiues because the spouse by the bond of her promise to the man becomes a wife and the man by the bond of his promise to the woman becomes an husband Deut. 22. 23. 24. Againe there can bee no sure-making and consequently no mariage with such a one as either hath been diuorced without a sufficient cause or hath wrongfully forsaken and reiected a lawfull mate before To this purpose saith our Sauiour Christ Matth. 19. 9. I say vnto you that whosoeuer shall put away his wife except it be for whoredome marieth another committeth adulterie and whosoeuer marrieth her which is diuorced committeth adulterie And Saint Paul 1. Cor. 7. 11. But if she depart let her remaine vnmarried or be reconciled vnto her husband and let not the husband put away his wife Hitherto I haue treated of essentiall markes which belong to the being of mariage Now I come to those that are accidentall An accidentall marke of a person fit for mariage is that which belongeth not to the being but to the well being that is to the holines and puritie of that estate And of this sort there be three that are the principall The first is paritie or equality in regard of Christian religion For in mariage there is a speciall care to be had that belieuers be matched with belieuers and Christians with Christians not belieuers with Infidels or Christians with Pagans For the former sort are only and alwaies to be made and kept and the latter to be auoided yea inhibited by positiue lawes and constitutions the breach whereof in such cases is seuerely to be punished The neglect of this point was one principall cause of the destructiō of the old world by the floud Gen. 6. 2. The sons of God saw the daughters of men that they were faire and they tooke them wiues of all that they liked Abraham obserued it in the mariage of Isaac his sonne and for that purpose tooke an oath of his seruant Gen. 24. 3. I will make thee sweare by the Lord God of heauen and God of the earth that thou shalt not take a wife vnto my son of the daughters of the Cananites among whom I dwell And in imitation of that holy example Isaac also giues a charge vnto Iacob his son that he should not take a wife of the daughters of Canaan Gen. 28. 1. Afterward there was an expresse law of God giuen by Moses touching the Gentiles that liued in that land Exod. 34. 15. Beware that thou make not a couenant with the inhabitants of the land c. vers 16. And take of their daughters vnto thy sonnes and their daughters go a whoring after their gods and make thy sonnes goe a whoring after their gods And the same law was vrged by Ezra the Priest in his time Ezra 10. 11. Separate your selues from the people of the land and from the strange wiues Lastly S. Paul exhorteth the Corinthiās 2. Cor. 6. 14. Be not vnequally yoked with the Infidels And Titus 3. 10. Reiect him that is an heretike after once or twice admonition But suppose it falleth out that the espousals be past and that both parties at the first were belieuers or one of thē only or that at first both were vnbelieuers and yet afterward one of them is conuerted to the faith or further admit that both were belieuers at the contract yet within some time after the one becomes an Infidell that is to say a Iew a Turke or an obstinate Heretike that denies the faith and razeth euen the very foundation of Religion in this case what is to be done Surely euē such espousals once made and ended if there be no other impediments but these are to stand continue firme and vnchangeable so long as the vnbelieuing partie doth willingly yeeld and submit him or her selfe to the performance of mariage duties properly belonging to man and wife My reason is the speech of Paul who saith If any brother haue a wife that beleeueth not if she be content to dwell with him let him not forsake her Againe The woman which hath an husband that belieueth not if he be content to dwell with her let her not forsake him 1. Cor. 7. 12. 13. If it be heere alledged that the sin of adulterie dissolues the bond both of contract and mariage and therefore much more doth idolatrie or infidelity which is a sinne farre more detestable then adulterie I answere that the questiō is not whether of these is the greater sin or more hainous in the sight of God for Infidelitie in both respects far exceedeth the other but whether of them is more repugnant to the nature and condition of wedlocke Now the sinne of adulterie is that alone which breakes the bond and renounceth the troth plighted in mariage and is the proper cause of a diuorce and not Idolatrie or Infidelitie The second note is parity or equalitie in regard of age and condition First of Age because though the mariage of persons whose yeares are farre vnequall is not expresly forbidden in the word yet is it agreeable to the rules of expediencie and decencie that the aged should match with the aged the yonger with the yonger Reasons are these First because the comforts of this societie in likelihood will by this meanes alwaies be equall and consequently bring the more contentment to either partie Secondly these vnequall mariages are often times offensiue to others Thirdly they cannot but in some cases proue offensiue euen to themselues For when a man of great yeares matcheth with a woman very yong or a yong stripling marrieth an aged woman the elder partie growing weake and impotent may the sooner come to be vnfit for mariage duties and the yonger being of greater strēgth and abilitie the more in danger of being exposed to incontinencie and that in the highest degree vnlesse he be restrained by Gods speciall grace For this cause it was a great fault wherewith one Apuleius was iustly charged that being but a very yong man he was married to a wife of 60. yeares of age Secondly of condition and estate For this also is answerable vnto the Apostles rule who exhorteth men to thinke of and to do those things which are true iust commendable and of good report Philip. 4. 8. Thus it is a seemely and commendable practise that the Prince the Noble man the free-man the gentleman the yeoman c. should be ioyned in societie with them that are of the same or like condition with themselues and not otherwise For this cause are the auncient Romans greatly to be commended who as we reade in their stories had such a carefull respect of their mariages in this
if any one in the familie starteth aside out of his calling and inticeth another to idolatrie he is to be reuealed Deut. 13. 6. And againe their case is very fearefull that do nothing in their houses but go finely and faire daintily from day to day This is the blacke marke that the Scripture sets vpon the rich glutton Luk. 16. 19. There was a certaine rich man which was cloathed in purple aud fine linen and fared deliciously euery day CHAP. 3. Of maried folkes A Familie is distinguished into sundry combinations or couples of persons A couple is that wherby two persons standing in mutuall relation to each other are combined together as it were in one And of these two the one is alwaies higher and beareth rule the other is lower and yeeldeth subiection Couples are of two sorts principall or lesse principall The principall is the combination of maried folkes and these are so termed in respect of Mariage Mariage is the lawfull coniunction of the two maried persons that is of one man and one woman into one flesh So was the first institution of mariage Gen. 2. 21. which is expounded by our Sauiour Christ Matth. 19. 6. Therfore they are no more two but one flesh And also by Paul Ephes. 5. 31. For this cause shall a man leaue father and mother and shall cleaue vnto his wife as two boords are ioyned together with glue and they which were two shall be one flesh Wherefore this is an eternal law of mariage that two and not three or foure shall be one flesh And for this cause the fathers who had many wiues and Concubines it may be that through custome they sinned of ignorance yet they are not in any wise to be excused Mariage of it selfe is a thing indifferent and the kingdome of God stands no more in it then in meats and drinks and yet it is a state in it selfe farre more excellent then the condition of single life For first it was ordained by God in Paradise aboue and before all other states of life in Adams innocencie before the fall Againe it was instituted vpon a most serious and solemne consultation among the three persons in the holy Trinitie Genes 1. 26. Let vs make man in our image according to our likenesse and let them rule ouer c. Gen. 2. 18. Iehouah Elohim said It is not good that the man should be himselfe alone I will make him an helpe meete for him Thirdly the manner of this coniunction was excellent for God ioyned our first parents Adam and Eue together immediately Fourthly God gaue a large blessing vnto the estate of mariage saying Increase and multiplie and fill the earth Lastly mariage was made appointed by God himselfe to be the fountaine and seminarie of all other sorts kinds of life in the Common-wealth and in the Church Now if mankind had continued in that vprightnes and integritie which it had by creation the state of single life had been of no price and estimation amongst men neither should it haue had any place in the world without great contempt of Gods ordinance and blessing Neuerthelesse since the fall to some men who haue the gift of continencie it is in many respects farre better then mariage yet not simplie but only by accident in regard of sundrie calamities which came into the world by sin For first it freeth a man from many and great cares of houshold affaires Againe it maketh him much more fit disposed to meditate of heauenly things without distraction of mind Besides that when dangers are either present or imminent in matters belonging to this life the single person is in this case happie because he and his are more secure and safe then others be who are in maried state 1. Cor. 7. 8. Therefore I say to the vnmaried and widowes It is good for them if they abide euen as I do vers 26. I suppose then this to be good for the present necessitie I meane that it is good for a man so to be vers 28. But if thou takest a wife thou sinnest not and if a virgin marrie she sinneth not neuerthelesse such shall haue trouble in the flesh vers 32. And I would haue you without care The end of mariage is fourefold The first is procreation of children for the propagation and continuance of the seed and posteritie of man vpon the earth Gen. 1. 28. Bringforth fruit multiplie fill the earth and subdue it Genes 9. 1. 1. Tim. 5. 14. The second is the procreation of an holy seed wherby the Church of God may be kept holy and chaste and there may alwaies be a holy company of men that may worship and serue God in the Church from age to age Malach. 2. 15. And did not he make one yet had hee abundance of spirit and wherefore one because he sought a godly seed The third is that after the fall of mankind it might be a soueraigne meanes to auoid fornication and consequently to subdue and slake the burning lusts of the flesh 1. Cor. 7. 2. Neuerthelesse for the auoiding of fornication let euery man haue his wife and euery woman haue her husband vers 9. But if they cannot abstaine let them marrie for it is better to marrie then to burne And for this cause some Schoolemen doe erre who hold that the secret comming together of man and wife cannot be without sinne vnlesse it be done for procreation of children Lombard the master of the Sentences saith the contrarie namely that mariage before the fall was only a dutie but now since the fall it is also remedie The fourth end is that the parties married may thereby performe the duties of their callings in better and more comfortable manner Prou. 31. 11. The heart of her husband trusteth her and hee shall haue no need of spoile vers 13. She seeketh wooll and flaxe and laboureth cheerefully with her hands Mariage is free to al orders and sorts of men without exception euen to those that haue the gift of contimencie but for them which cannot abstaine it â—s by the expresse commandement of God necessarie Hebr. 13. 4. Mariage is honorable amongst all men and the bed vndefiled 1 Cor. 7. 9. But if they cannot abstaine let them marrie By which it appeareth to be a cleare case that the commandement of the Pope of Rome whereby he forbiddeth mariage of certaine persons as namely of Clergie men is meerely diabolicall for so writeth the Apostle 1. Tim. 4. 1. The spirit speaketh euidently that in the latter times some shall depart froÌ„ the faith and shall giue heed vnto spirits of error and doctrines of diuels vers 3. forbidding to marrie But against this doctrine sundrie things are alleaged Obiect 1. The Apostle commandeth the married among the Corinthes to abstaine with consent for a time that they might giue themselues to fasting and praier 1. Cor. 7. 5. I answere that Paul speakes not in that place of daily and common seruice of God in
as it is for the father to marrie the daughter or the sonne the mother Againe in the collaterall it is as vnlawful for the vncle by the mothers side to marrie the wife of his sisters son and so in other degrees as it is for him to match in the same degrees of cōsanguinitie The reason is because in these lines as well as in those of consanguinitie superiours and inferiours are each to other as parents and children From hence amongst other things it may bee gathered that it is in no sort lawful for a man when his wife is dead to marrie her sister Leuit. 18. 16. Thou shalt not discouer the shame of thy brothers wife for it is thy brothers shame And Leuit 20. 21. The man that taketh his brothers wife committeth filthines because he hath vncouered his brothers shame Against this doctrine it is obiected First that God commandeth not to take a wife with her sister during her life Leuit. 18. 18. in which place hee doth not simplie forbid a man to marry two sisters one after another but to marrie them both together and therefore after the wife is dead a man may marrie her sister Ans. The place is a flat prohibition of the sin of Polygamie For to take a wife to her sister in the Hebrew phrase is nothing else but to take two wiues one to another The like forme of speech is vsed otherwhere by Moses as Exo. 26. 3. Fiue curtaines shall bee coupled together the woman to her sister that is one to another and the other fiue curtaines shall be coupled the woman to her sister that is the one to the other Ezech. 1. 9. The foure beasts were ioyned with their wings the woman to her sister that is the one to the other Againe Moses himselfe there alledgeth two reasons against Polygamie the one is because the man is to loue cherish and comfort this wife whereas if he should take vnto him another besides her he should greatly vex his first lawfull wife The other because by that meanes he should vncouer the shame of his wife that is he should play a very dishonest part with her to whom he was before lawfully married Obiect 2 The Lord commanded by a speciall law that the brother in case his brother died without issue should take his wife and raise vp seede vnto him Deut. 25. 5. Answ. The words of Moses are a speciall exception of a generall law propounded in Leuit. 18. 16. Thou shalt not discouer the shame of thy brothers wife for it is thy brothers shame And they are peculiarly directed to the Israelites vpon speciall cause that when the elder brother died without seed the name of the first borne might not be extinct but the familie might bee preserued in that name by raising vp of seed vnto him which being a priuiledge proper to the Israelites vpon that speciall consideration it must not bee enlarged to any other sort of men whatsoeuer Neither is the text to be vnderstood of cousins remoued only as some thinke but also of the next of the kindred by blood as appeareth plainly by the historie of Ruth chap. I. vers II. in these words of Naomi to her daughters in law Turne againe my daughters for what cause will you go with me Are there any moe sonnes in my wombe that they may bee your husbands Turne againe my daughters go your way for I am too old to haue a husband c. III. Rule The wiues kinsman by blood is of affinitie to her husband only but vnto his kindred by blood the said kinsman hath no affinitie at all So on the contrarie it is true that though the husbands kinsman by blood be allied to his wife yet he hath no alliance to those that are kinsmen of blood vnto her The reason is because betweene the kindred of blood on the mans side and the kindred of blood on the womans side there is no affinitie For the prohibition of the degrees of affinitie hath force in those only which are the cause thereof and goeth no further Now the cause being only in the married persons themselues the effect may not in reason be enlarged to them that are of the same blood with either of them From this rule it followeth that the kindred of both married persons by blood may lawfully match together The sonne in law may match with the daughter of his mother in law The father and the son by another wife may marrie the mother and the daughter Two brothers may lawfully match with two sisters IV. Rule Kindred of affinitie to the wife are also kindred of affinitie to her husband but how not properly but only after a sort and as it were of affinitie So on the contrarie Kindred of alliance to the husband are as it were of alliance to his wife For example The wife of my father in law which is not my wiues owne mother but her step-mother is as it were my mother in law for she is as it were of affinitie to me because she is indeed of affinitie to my wife Those which are of affinitie only after a sort cannot conueniently match one with another And therefore the sonne in law may not marrie with his wiues step-mother because being of affinitie to his wife shee is in stead of a mother in law to him Neither may the daughter in law match with her husbands step-father because hee is as it were a step-father to her Againe my sisters husband may not marry my brothers wife for they are after a sort brother and sister each to other The reason hereof is because the wife is holden in law a part of her husband and therfore if affinitie hinders mariage with one of the married couples it hindreth as well in the like case and respect mariage with the other And thus much touching the distance of blood which in the choice of persons fit for mariage is most necessarily to be obserued For in the 18. chapter of Leuiticus there are sixteene seuerall sorts of persons with whom mariage is forbidden The first is the mother The second is the step-mother The thid the sister by the same father and mother The fourth the half-sister by one of the parents only The fifth is the neece by the sonne The sixth the neece by the daughter The seuenth the fathers sister The eight the vncles that is the fathers brothers wife The ninth the mothers sister The tenth the daughter in law or sons wife The eleuenth the brothers wife The twelfth the wiues mother The thirteenth the step-daughter or the wiues daughter by another husbād or husbāds daughter by a former wife The fourteenth is the step-sonnes daughter that is his daughter who was the wiues sonne by another husbād The fifteenth the step-daughters daughter The sixteenth is the wiues sister And not only these but all other answerable to them either in the same or like degree are by equall proportion forbidden to be had in mariage It is alledged
time proues incurablie contagious and so lothsome that the one may iustly feare to keepe and conuerse with the other as it falleth out when one is tainted with leprosie then the contract is vtterly to be dissolued as if God himself should haue commanded it though the promise was formerlie made the parties themselues should be vnwilling God hath ordained Matrimonie to helpe not to hurt either the persons themselues or others Where therefore these diseases be which may infect hurt or destroy others there God hath as it were testified from heauen that the act done is not pleasing vnto him and that presently it ought to be frustrate The contract being thus once dissolued the sounder partie shall be at his or her libertie to marrie againe But the diseased is by the Magistrates authoritie to be forbidden societie with any other in way of mariage and commanded to lead his life where he may conueniently from companie for feare of infection And withal he is for his owne part to sue vnto God by prayer in faith for the gift of continencie For certaine it is that he to whom God hath denied the power of vsing mariage with good conscience is thereby euen called to continencie and single life But if the disease be not contagious yet either incurable or so nastie that either of the espoused hath iust cause to be afraid of the others companie then both are to be aduised not to claime their right but willingly to surrender it each to other by mutuall consent that they may be free againe not bound by any former promise to liue together as man and wife Considering that they haue no hope mutually to conuerse together with comfort contentment while they so remaine Vpon this aduice giuen by their lawfull Pastor or some in his stead if they both yeeld or one of them at the least desires to be at his owne libertie the espousals are forthwith to be brokeÌ„ off But if neither will consent to a separation but rather proceed as they haue begun and in probability the one haue no iust cause to hold the other in suspition in respect of contagion they are not to be hindered from the consummation of their mariage Furthermore though one of them should haue a disease which is continuall without intermission yet curable or any other incoÌ„uenience should befall either of them after the sure-making wherby they become lame deafe or dumbe c. yet this is not a sufficient cause to moue them to renounce and dissolue the contract A second Case What if it falleth out that after the finishing of the contract one of the espoused persons bee long absent from the other so as the absence bee preiudiciall to the mariage that should ensue vpon the contract Answ. Inquirie must be made whether this absence be voluntarie or against the will of the partie If it be voluntarie For example if the man vpon an honest and iust cause the woman also being priuie thereunto shall go beyond seas and being admonished of his dutie before hand shal notwithstanding stay a whole yeare or more and will not returne but further wilfully absent himselfe then may it be lawfull to the woman to craue of the publike Magistrate a dissolution of the couenant made consequently marry another man vnlesse the former to whom she was contracted be heard of If he be then shall it be lawfull for him to pleade for himselfe and tendring no iust cause of his refusall he shall be forced by the Magistrates authoritie to stand to his promise and take the woman for his wife And the same order is to be taken in the wilfull absence of the woman after she is contracted If againe the man or woman shall vpon an euill mind and with purpose to deceiue each other absent theÌ„selues and depart meanes must be vsed that they may be admonished of their dutie That being done or at least vndertaken and yet the partie offending will not appeare if the other that is present vpon certaine knowledge of his or her want in respect of continencie shall sue to the Magistrate after publike and solemne notice giuen the contract may be broken But if on the other side either of them be absent against their wil and intendeth no fraud or deceit but is violently detained by captiuitie imprisonment sicknes force banishment transportation or such like then the partie present being desirous of the consummation of the mariage ought either to make meanes vnto him and expect his returne or haue certaine notice of his death before she promise or haue to do with any other in way of mariage A third Case What if after the contract one of the parties becomes furious or madde Answ. If the disease be continuall without intermission in all equitie and likelihood the espousals are to be dissolued vnlesse both parties after knowledge and experience of the disease haue knowne one another yet in this and all such like cases it is fit that all good meanes be tried and vsed and sufficient time be giuen for the restoring of the diseased to their former good estate and for the accomplishment of the mariage lawfully begun as before CHAP. 8. Of Mariage MAriage is that wherby the coniunction formerly begunne in the contract is solemnely manifested and brought to perfection Mariage is consummate by three sorts of actions one of the parents of the Bride and Bridegroome the other of the Minister in publike the third of the persons coupled together The action of the Parents is vpon the Mariage-day to bring the Bride and deliuer her to the Bride-groome that they two may become actually man and wife and performe each to other all matrimoniall duties And where the mariage is complete in any other manner so as the Parents vpon sound iudgement and deliberation shall deny their full and free consent either in expresse words or by coÌ„niuence and silence and that vpon iust and lawfull cause there though in the ciuill courts of men it may stand and the children borne therein bee legitimate before men yet the truth is before God it is of no force but a meere nullitie And because this doctrine touching consent of parents in these Cases is of great vse and auaileth much to the supporting and maiâ—â—â—ining of families I will first open the truth thereof and then proue it by reasons Vnder the name of parents are comprehended First the Father and Mother Secondly all Tutors and Guardians who haue the proper sole charge of wards or others vnder yeares of discretion Thirdly all such as are kindred of blood who are in stead of parents to childreÌ„ as the vncle by the fathers side the vncle by the mothers side and such like Now touching the consent of parents that is of father and mother I hold it requisite of necessitie to marriage For the authoritie of parents must not be resisted or violated As for Tutors and such as haue the place of parents their consent is not
haue knowledge giuing honor to the woman as to the weaker vessell euen as they which are heires together of the grace of life that your prayers be not interrupted This dutie must bee kept especiallie the first yeare of mariage Deut. 24. 5. When a man taketh a wife hee shall not go on warfare neither shall be charged with any busines but shall bee free at home one yeare reioyce with his wife which he hath taken And the ground of this commandement no doubt is that they might learne to know one anothers cōditions and that they might worke a setled affection one towards another which afterward vpon no occasion might bee changed Yet they may bee absent each from other in two cases First vpon mutuall consent for a time for the performing of some busines that is requisite for the familie Prou. 7. 19. For mine husband is not at home he is gone a far iourney at the appointed time he will returne againe Secondly the like absence is allowed when some great and weightie affaires either in the Church or Common-wealth are in hand 2. Sam. 11. 9. 10. But Vriah slept at the doore of the Kings Palace with all the seruants of his Lord and went not downe to his house v. II. Then Vriah answered Dauid The Arke and Israel and Iudah dwell in tents and my Lord Ioab and all the seruants of my Lord abide in the open field shall I then go into my house to eate and drinke and lie with my wife by thy life and by the life of my soule I will not do this thing Hence ariseth a question What if after mariage consummate there grow vpon one of the parties a contagious disease that cannot be cured but is so lothsome that the other whole partie cannot endure cohabitation at all Answ. Both the mariage it selfe and the dutie of dwelling together ought to continue firme and sure notwithstanding yet so as the sound partie neither may nor ought in good conscience to desire coniunction with the other whereby he or she may bring infection vpon themselues and consequently hurt their children and indanger the Common-wealth But if either of the parties haue not the gift of continencie nor cannot abstaine they must sue for it vnto God in earnest prayer who will giue it vnto them For there God hath called a man or woman to continencie where they be necessarily hindred from the vse of the ordinarie and lawfull remedie of the contract The contrarie to Cohabitation is Desertion Desertion is when one of the married folkes vpon a wilfull and obstinate mind of their owne head departeth from the other without a iust and necessarie cause Touching this point there bee sundrie Cases expounded I. Case Suppose that an husband which is an vnbeleeuer or an heretike in the foundation of his owne accord vpon detestation of true religion quite forsakes the beleeuing wife and denies any more to dwell with her what is to be done Answ. All good meanes must bee first vsed to bring the infected partie to repentance and when none will succeed but the case remaineth desperate then mariage is dissolued on his part and the beleeuing wife is free to marrie another So saith the Apostle 1. Cor. 7. 15. If the vnbeleeuing partie depart let him depart a brother or a sister is not in subiection in such things but God hath called vs vnto peace In which words obserue a twofold reason I. He that is at libertie may marrie another now the beleeuing partie forsaken is at libertie because hee is not in subiection in such things therefore he may marrie another II. God hath called vs vnto peace saith Paul and this peace cannot be kept if the beleeuing partie forsaken cannot containe vnlesse he marrie Ambrose vpon the place saith That mariage cannot stand firme which is separated from the worship and seruice of God and therefore it is no sinne in the partie that is for saken for Gods cause to be married to another and the vnbeleeuer departing sinneth both against God and against the law of wedlock because he denies to remain in that estate in regard of religion Therefore hee breakes the couenant of mariage and the other is not bound in this case to keepe touch with him the master of the sentences saith That the beleeuing partie in this case is not bound to follow the vnbeleeuer when hee departeth but while hee liues may marrie another Augustine affirmeth that euen the wife which is ioyned to her husband in lawfull societie if shee will not abide with her Christian husband because he is a Christian may be forsaken and left without sin And it is far better that the couenant should be dissolued that man and wife haue made each with other then that the Couenant which man hath made with God The people of Israel being in affliction were constrained to break the former made with strange women that they might keepe the latter Ezra 10. 11. 19. It is alledged that the vnbeleeuing partie may haply repent and then to make a dissolution is in vaine But I say that it is as likely that he will neuer repent and therefore there is cause that the knot should be dissolued Againe it is lawfull say some to make a diuorce out of the case of Adulterie Answ. The belieuing partie which is forsaken is not the cause of the diuorce but is a patient of the separation wrongfully made by the vnbeleeuer And Christ where he mentioneth the Case of Adulterie Matth. 19. speaketh of an equall mariage whereas Paul speakes of an vnequall II. Case What if there fall out a desertion betweene two married folkes which are both beleeuers Answ. The faultie person who is the cause of this desertion is to be forced by course of Ciuill and Ecclesiasticall censure to performe his or her dutie Vpon which proceeding if he remaine obstinate and peruerse in will the other must in patience earnest prayer vnto God waite the time vntill his mind may be changed and he made to relent by the order of the Magistrate But if the one of them by iust occasion of feare be compelled to depart from the other and cannot returne againe without apparent danger of life in this case they are not bound to returne but the delinquent partie is to remaine solitarie till they be instructed and made willing to doe their duties and in the meane while the partie innocent must be resolued that God hath called him or her to single life Againe be it that the one is resolutely vnwilling to dwell with the other and thereupon flies away without any fault of the other if the thing after a long space bee sufficiently knowne before-hand and all possible meanes haue been vsed to reclaime the guiltie person yea being called he doth not personally appeare before the Iudge to yeeld a reason of the fact after publike and solemne declaration made the Minister vpon such desertion may pronounce the mariage to be dissolued For he
only the vse but the bond and couenant of mariage Matth. 19. 9. I say therefore vnto you that whosoeuer shall put away his wife except it be for whoredome and marrie another committeth adulterie c. And yet the same bond may be continued and grow vp againe by the good will and consent of the partie innocent and consequently they may be reconciled and dwell together still 1. Sam. 25. 44. Now Saul had giuen Michal his daughter Dauids wife to Phalti the sonne of Laish which was of Gallim 2. Sam. 3. 14. Then Dauid sent messengers to Ishbosheth Sauls sonne saying Deliuer me my wife Michal which I married for an hundred foreskins of the Philistims The same course may be taken in like cases by the innocent specially vpon the repentance of the guiltie person But yet euery man must be left to his owne conscience and none is to bee compelled to take another from whom hee may iustly bee separated against his will Now in requiring of a diuorce there is an equall right and power in both parties so as the woman may require it as well as the man and he as wel as she The reason is because they are equally bound each to other and haue also the same interest in one anothers bodie prouided alwaies that the man is to maintaine his superioritie and the woman to obserue that modestie which beseemeth her towards the man After the diuorcement made it shal be lawful for the harmelesse partie not hauing the gift of continencie vpon leaue obtained of the Church and the Christian Magistrate to marrie againe But what then shall become of the partie offending Answ. If vpon the hazard of his Conscience in want of the remedie any libertie of second mariage bee to bee granted vnto him by the Church or Ciuill Magistrate as indeed here in England there is not diuers restraints in this Case must be obserued First no such libertie is to be granted so long as the matter remaines vncertaine whether they may be reconciled specially while the partie innocent liueth in single life Secondly it must euidently appeare that the said offending partie hath earnestly rpented him of his sin before he can either be receiued into the Church or admitted to a second mariage Thirdly this liberty is not to be granted him either presently or vnaduisedly but vpon frequent and serious admonition rather to giue himselfe to mourning and lamentation and still to remaine alone then to desire againe to enioy the benefit of that state which he hath alreadie so shamefully abused So much of the first way of performance of due beneuolence The second way is by cherishing one another Ephes. 5. 29. No man euer hated his owne flesh but nourisheth and cherisheth it as Christ also doth the Church This cherishing is the performing of any duties that tend to the preseruing of the liues one of another Wherefore they are freely to cōmunicate their goods their coūsel their labors each to other for the good of themselues and theirs The third way is by an holy kind of reioicing and solacing themselues each with other in a mutuall declaration of the signes and tokens of loue and kindnesse Prou. 5. 18. Reioyce with the wife of thy youth vers 19. Let her be as the louing Hind and pleasant wild goat let her breasts satisfie thee at all times and delight in her loue continually Cantic 1. 1. Let him kisse me with the kisses of his mouth for thy loue is better them wine Gen. 26. 8. So after he had bin there a long time Abimelek King of the Philistims looked out at a window and loe hee saw Isaak sporting with Rebekah his wife Then Abimelek called Isaak and said Loe shee is of a suretie thy wife Esay 62. 7. As a yong man marrieth a virgin so shall thy sonnes marrie thee and as a Bridegroome is glad of the Bride so shall thy God reioyce ouer thee This reioycing and delight is more permitted to the man then to the woman and to them both more in their yong yeares then in their old age CHAP. 11. Of the Husband MArried folkes are either husbād or wife The husband is he which hath authoritie ouer the wife hereupon in Scripture he is called the guide of her youth Prou. 2. 17. and they twaine being but one flesh he is also the head ouer his wife The duties of the husband towards the wife are these I. To loue her as himselfe Eph. 5. 33. Let euery one loue his wife euen as himselfe Gen. 24. 67. Afterward Isaak brought her vnto the tent of Sarah his mother and hee tooke Rebekah and she was his wife and he loued her so Isaak left mourning for his mother Note how the loue of the husband to the wife mitigates sorrow for the death of the mother He is to shew this loue in two things First in protecting her from danger Gen. 20. 16. And vnto Sarah he said behold I haue giuen 1000. shekels of siluer vnto thy brother behold he is the couering of thine eies amongst all that are with thee Let it be knowne amongst all be thou instructed 1. Sam. 30. 5. Dauids two wiues were taken prisoners also Ahinoam the Izreelite and Abigail the wife of Nabal the Carmelite v. 8. Then Dauid asked counsell of the Lord saying Shall I follow after this companie shall I ouertake them And hee answered him Follow for thou shalt surely ouertake them and recouer all Secondly in regarding her estate as his owne and prouiding maintenance for her both for his life time and as much as he may for time to come after his death Ephes. 5. 28. So ought men to loue their wiues as their owne bodies he that loueth his wife loueth himselfe vers 29. For no man yet hated his owne flesh but nourisheth it c. Exod. 21. 10. If he take him another wife he shall not diminish her food her rayment and recompence of her virginitie Ruth 3. 9. Vnto whom he said who art thou which said I am Ruth thine handmaid spread therefore the wing of thy garment ouer thine handmaid for thou art the kinsman II. To honor his wife 1. Pet. 3. 7. Giuing honor to the woman This honor stands in three things First in making account of her as his companion or yoke-fellow For this cause the woman when she was created was not takē out of the mans head because she was not made to rule ouer him nor out of his feet because God did not make her subiect to him as a seruant but out of his side to the end that man should take her as his mate Secōdly in a wise patiēt bearing or couering of her infirmities as anger waywardnes and such like in respect of the weaknes of her sexe 1. Pet. 3. 7. Giuing honor to the woman as vnto the weaker vessell seeing yee are heires together of the grace of life that your prayers bee not hindred Thirdly by suffering himselfe sometimes to be admonished or aduised by