good Hit were better for the neuer to come in to theyr syght / leste they auenge on the the iniury of theyr kynde nor to name thy selfe by theyr names / selfe they punyshe the for fylyng theyr names And I speke in ernest / for here is no place to bourde in there shulde be made some decre / that none vnhoneste woman shulde be called Mary For whye do nat we gyue as moche honoure vnto that name / whom all we a ryse and make reuerence vntyll / as the pagans gaue vnto some of their folkes For ī Athens / whā Hermodius and Aristogiton had bany shed the tyrans out of the cite / there was by a decre determined / that no bonde mā / nor any that occupped any vile crafte / shulde be named by theyr names Howe the mayde shall behaue her selfe for the abrode The .xii. Chaptre HOrthe she must nedes go some tymes / but I wolde hit shulde be as selde as may be / for many causes Principally bycause as ofte as a mayde goth forth amonge people / so oftē she cometh in iugement and extreme perell of her beautie / honeste / demurenes / witte / shamfastnes / and vertue For nothyng is more tender / than is the same and estimation of women / nor nothynge more in daunger of wronge in so moche that hit hath be sayde / and nat without a cause / to hange by a copwebbe / bycause those thynges / that I haue rehersed / be required perfet in a womā and folkes iugementes be dangerous to please / and suspititous and as Ouid saith / we be quicke inough in beleuynge the yll And as Cicero saythe / Nos thynge fleeth more sweftly than an yll worde / nothynge gothe soner forth / nothyng is soner taken / nor brodder spredde that if a sklander ones take holde in a maydes name by folkes opynyon / hit is in a maner euerlastynge / nor can nat be wasshed away without great tokennes and shewes of chastite and wysedome If thou talke lyttell in cōpany / folkes thynke thou canste but lyttell good if thou speke moche / they reken the lyght if thou speke vncoūnyngly / they counte the dull wytted if thou speake counnyngly / thou shalte be called a shrewe if thou answere nat quickly / thou shalt be called proude / or yll brought up if thou answere / they shall say thou wylt be sone ouercomē if thou syt with demure countenannce / thou arte called a dissembler if thou make moche mouynge / they wyll call the folishe if thou loke on any syde / than wyll they say / thy mynde is there if thou laughe whan any man laugheth / though thou do hit nat a purpose / streyght they wyll say thou hast a fantasye vnto the man and his sayenge / and that hit were not great maistry to wȳne the. Wher to shuld I tell / howe moche occasion of vyce and noughtynes is a brode Wherfore the poet semeth to haue sayd nat without a cause It is nat lefull for maydes to be sene abrode Howe moche were hit better to abyde at home / than go forth and here so many iudgementes / and so dyuers vpon the / and be in so many leopardies Nor there is none / that had more nede to folowe this greke sayeng / Lyue vnknowen Therfore Tucydides sayde / she was the beste woman / of whom was least talke / either vnto her preyse / or her dispreyse A woman shulde be kepte close / nor be knowen of many / for hit is a token of no great chastite or good name / to be knowen of many / or be songen about in the cite in songes / or to be markedde or named by any notable marke / as whyte / lame / gogle eied / lytell / great / fat / maymed / or stuttynge / these ought nat to be knowen abrode in a good woman Why than saye som / shuld we neuer walke out of our owne dores Shuld we euer lye at home that were as though we shuld lye in pryson For so doth some proude foles take this sayenge / that desyre to se to be sene Nay verily they shall go forth some tymes / if nede require / and if theyr father commaunde or theyr mother but afore she go forth at dore / let her prepare her mynde and stomake none other wise / thā if she went to fyght Let her remembre / what she shall here / what she shal se / and what her selfe shal say Let her cōsidre with her selfe / that some thȳg shall chaunce on euerye syde / that shall moue her chastite and her good mȳde Agaynst these dartes of the deuyll fleynge on euery syde / let her take the buckler of stomacke defēded with good exāples preceptes / a fyrme purpose of chastite / a mynd euer bente towarde Christe And lette her knowe / that she goth but to vanyte / whiche leste she be taken with it / she had nede to prouide wysely / that that she shall se forth abrode / is to be counted none other thyng / but a shewe of the lyfe of the worlde by whose vices set before her eies / she mayelerne / nat only to kepe her selfe out of the contagiousnes / but more ouer to amende her owne fautes and that what houre so euer she turneth her selfe from god vnto men / whether she lyke them or be lyked of them / she forsakethe Christe and of Christis spouse sodaynly becometh an adulterar If she se any goodnes / let her loue hit for Christe if she se any euyll / let her fle hit for Christe Let her take hede neuer to garnysshe her selfe so / nor so go / nor do / or speke so / that she be the deuylles snare to chatche men in She shulde nat onely do none yll her selfe / but as moche as she can / so behaue her selfe / that she be none occasion vnto other of doynge yll orels shall she be a membre of the deuyll / whose instrument she is all redye / and nat Christis They saye / that the holy virgin our lady was so demure and sadde / that if any man cast a wonton eie vpon her / that foule heate was all quenched as though a mā had cast a fyre brāde in to the water Nowe whan she is apoynted with these thoughtes and suche other / let her go forth with her mother if she haue any / and haue leaue to go if she haue no mother / let her go with some sadde woman / that is a wydowe / or a wyfe / or some good mayde of vertuous lyuyng / sobre of speche / holy shamfastnes Homerus writeth / that the chast woman Penelope dyd come forth into the company of her wowers / but nat alone / but with two honest maydes in her company and also her sonne Telemachus was a monge them syttynge And as saynt Hieronyme commandeth / whan she goth forth abrode / let her nat beare her brestis and her necke
is hit / nat to loue them that thou hast borne But yet let them hyde their loue / lest the children take boldenes there vpō / to do what they lyste Nor lette nat loue stoppe her to punisshe her children for theyr vices / and to strength their bodies and wittes with sadde bryngynge vp For you mothers be the cause of mooste parte of ylnes amonge folkes wherby you maye se / howe moche your children are beholdyng vnto you / whiche induce noughty opinions in to them with your foly For you haue the bryngyng vp of them and you alowe theyr vnthriftynes And whan they be goynge vnto high vertue / and abhorre the ryches of the worlde / and the pompe of the deuyll you with your wepynge / and sharpe rebukynge / call them backe agayne in to the deuylles snares bycause you had leauer se them ryche thā good Agrippyna / mother vnto themperour Nero / whan she had asked south sayers of her sonne / whether he shuld be emperoure / yea sayde they / but he shall kyll his mother let hym kyll her sayd she / so that he maye be emperour And so he both was emperour kylled her But whan it came to the poynt / Agrippyna wolde nat gladly haue bene kylled / and repented that her son had th empyre Fynally you / through your cherishyng wil neither let them take laboure to lerne vertue and haue a pleasure to fyll them full of vices with delicatenes Therfore many of you wepe and wayle for I speke nat of all and be well punysshed and worthyly in this lyfe / for your madnes Whan you be sory to se your chyldren suche as your selfe haue made them Nor you be loued of them agayne / whan they perceyue them selfe vnloued of all other for your loue There is a certayne tale of a yonge mā / whiche whā he was led to be put to deth / desyred to speke with his mother and whan she came / layde his mouthe to her eare / and bote it of And whan the people that were by rebuked hym callȳg hym nat only a these / but also cursed / for so entreatynge his mother / he answered agayne This is the rewarde for her bryn gynge vp For if she / sayd he / had corrected me for stealing my felowes boke out of the schole / whiche was my fyrst thefte thā had I nat proceded vnto these mischeuous dedes But she cherysshed me / kyssed me for my doyng Nowe where to shulde I reherse the madnes of those mothers / that loue better those children / that be foule / croked / leude / dullardes / sluggardes / droūkerdes / vnruely / and folisshe / than those / that be fayre / vpryght / counnyng / quicke witted / inuentyue / sober / treatable / quiet and wyse Whether is this an errour of folkes myndes / or a punysshement of god / deserued for their syns / to make them to loue suche thȳges / as be worthy no loue Dūme beastis cherysshe euer the fayrest of their whelpes / or byrdes / lightly hit is a sygne of good proffe in them / whan the dāmes make moche of them Also hūters knowe that that shal be the best dogge / whiche the damme is most busye about / and for whom she careth the most / and carieth fyrst in to her lytter But in mākynde that is the moste vile and the least worthe / that the mother loueth most tenderly If you will beloued in dede of your children / and specially in that age / whan they knowe what is true and holy loue / thā make them nat to loue you ouer moche / whan they knowe nat yet what loue is but sette more by a spised cake / a hunnye combe / or a pece of sugare / than by bothe father and mother No mother loued her childe better thā myne dyd me neither any chylde dyd euer lesse perceyue hym selfe loued of his mother than I. She neuer lyghtely laughed vpon me she neuer cokered me and yet whā I had ben .iii. or .iiij. dayes out of her house / that she wyst nat where / she was almost sore sicke And whan I was comen home / I coulde nat perceyue that euer she longed for me Therfore was ther no body / that I more fled / or was more lothe to come nyghe / than my mother / whan I was a childe But after I came to yonge mānes estate / there was no body / whom I delited more to haue in syghte Whose memorye nowe I haue in reuerence / as afte as she cometh to my remēbraūce / I enbrace her with in my mynde and thoughte / whan I can nat with my body I had a frende at Paris / a very well lerned man Whiche amonge other great benefites of god / rekened this for one that his mother was deade / that sherysshed hym so wonderously Whiche sayd he if she had lyued / I had neuer come to Paris to lerne But had syt styll at home all my lyfe / amōge dicyng / drabbes / delycates / and pleasures / as I begounne Howe coude this man loue his mother / that was so glad of her dethe But a wyse mother shall nat wysshe for pleasures vnto her childe / but vertue Nor for ryches / but for counnyng / and good fame And rather for an honest dethe / than for an vncomly lyfe The women of Lacedemon / had leauer their sonnes shulde dye honestelye for the defence of they ▪ coūtrey / than fle to saue theyr lyues And we rede in histories / that many of them haue kylled with theyr owne hādes / theyr sonnes / that were cowardes and dastardes / pronouncyng these wordes This was neuer my sonne / Nor borne in Lacedemone Sophia whiche had .iij. goodly daughters / named them with .iij. names of vertue / hope / faith / and charite / and was very glad to se them all dye for the honour of Christe / buried them her owne selfe / nat farre from Rome / in the tyme of Hadryan themperour Let nat the mothers be so diligēt in teachynge theyr children craftes to gette good by / as to make them vertuous Neither shall bydde them take exāple of suche as haue gathered moche goodes in shorte space but rather of suche as haue comen vnto great vertue and goodnes The people of Megara is dispreysed / and nat without a cause / for teachyng theyr children nygardshyppe and couetyse and in stede of honest children / made them sparynge bonde men Wherfore they caused suche thynges / as wese chaunseth nowe adayes / that with byddyng them so ofte / seke for good / get good / increase theyr good / and gether good by all meanes / they caused their children to do myschiefe vngratious dedes The whiche faute is a great parte in the fathers and mothers / whiche be coūsaylours / causers / and setters vpon / and as good reason was / whan the children coulde fynde none other wayes to come by ryches /
owne So a good womaÌ„ shall nat bryng with her to the courte argumeÌ„tes of pleaders in the lawe / but the auctorite of recorde And she that is bablyng / and busye / troublous / muste nedes wereye men / and make them to lothe her / and hyndreth her of the socour that I spake of And this I haue sayde by good iudges and aduocates / or at the least suche as she knoweth nat to be yll For some be so nyce and wanton / that they will sell theyr counsayle and iugementes for theyr vnthrifty pleasure of their body Vpon whom doutles the common good order and maner wolde take punysshement / sauyng that the lawes / as the wyse man sayd / be lyke the coppe webbes / that take all littell beastis / and let the great alone But a good wydowe / if she knowe the they be suche / as she may well inough by theyr name that they haue of the people / she shall eschewe them fle / nat only with the losse of her goodes / but also ieoê‘die of her selfe / if nede were And the same I wolde she shulde do by all that be wanton and vicious Nowe of runnyng about to other mennes houses / saynt Paule hath a precepte / that those wydowes ought to be abiecte / as mysfamous / that rounne ydell from house to house and nat only idell / but also be babblars ful of wordes / where as is nat coÌ„uenient For there be some / whiche whan they thinke their selfe they haue done all theyr owne busynes / than without shame they medle with other folkes busines / gyue counsaile / as though they were great sages / and exhorte and gyue preceptes / rebuke correcte / pyke fautes / and be wondrous quicke of syght from home / and at home blynde inough Of seconde mariages The .vij. Chaptre NOr to condeÌ„ne and reproue vtterly seconde mariages / it were a poynt of heresye Howe be it that better is to absteyne thaÌ„ marye agayne / is nat only counsayled by Christyane purenes / that is to saye by diuine wysedome / but also by pagans / that is to say / by worldly wisedome Cornelius Tacitus / as I haue rehersed / sayth / the women of Almayne were nat wonte to marie but of maydes and thoughe they were wydowes in theyr youthe / yet wolde they nat marye agayne / and specially the noble women Valeria / syster vn to Messala / and Portia the yoÌ„ger doughter of Cato / whan there was praysed vnto her / for her good nes / a woman that had betwyse maried / Portia answered / An happy a chast dame wolde neuer marye oftener than ones Cornelia / the mother of Caius Titus Gracchus / whan she was moued with great ê“mises by Ptolome the kyng of Egypt / to marye agayne / she refused / had leauer be called Cornelia Gracchus wyfe / than the quene of Egipte Also seconde mariagis were rebuked in playes enterludes / and verses of poetes in this maner Ofte maryeng can nat be without occasioÌ„ of repreheÌ„sioÌ„ And a womaÌ„ that marieth many / can nat please many Nat wtstaÌ„dyng wydowes lay many causes / wherfore they say they must marie agayÌ„e of whom saint Hieronyme speketh in this maner / writyÌ„g vnto the holy womaÌ„ Furia YoÌ„ge widowes / of whom there hath many gone bacwarde after the deuyl / after that they haue had theyr pleasure by maryeng in Christe / be woÌ„te to say / My goodes spilleÌ„ dayly / the heritage of myn auncetry perissheth / my seruauÌ„tes speke stubbournely pÌ„sumtuously / my mayde wyl nat do my coÌ„mauÌ„dement / who shal go before me forthe Who shall answere for my house reÌ„te Who shall teache my yoÌ„ge soÌ„nes Who shall bryng vp my yoÌ„ge doughters And so they laye that for a cause to marye fore / whiche shulde rather let them froÌ„ it For she bryÌ„geth vpon her childreÌ„ an enemie / nat a norisher nat a father / but a tyraÌ„ne And she inflamed with vicious lust / forgetteth her owne woÌ„be she that late afore sat mournyÌ„g amoÌ„ge her children / that ê‘ceiue nat their owne losse harmes / nowe is pyked vp a newe wyfe Wher to layest thou the cause in thyne enherytaÌ„ce / pride of thy seruauÌ„tes coÌ„fesse thyn owne viciousnes For none of you taketh a husbaÌ„de but to the intent that she wyll lye with hym / nor excepte her lust pricke her What a ragiousnes is it / to set thy chastite commoÌ„ lyke an harlotte / that thou mayst gether riches And for a vile / a thyÌ„g that shall sone passe away / to fyle thy chastite / that is a thyÌ„g most precious euerlastyÌ„g If thou haue childreÌ„ alredy / what nedest thou to marie If thou haue none / why dost thou nat feare the bareÌ„nes / that thou hast proued afore aueÌ„terest vpoÌ„ aÌ„ vncertayne thyÌ„g / forgost thyn honestie chastite / that thou wast sure of Nowe thou hast writyÌ„g of spousage made the / that within shorte whyle after / thou may be coÌ„pelled to write a testament The husbande shall feyne hym selfe sicke / shal do on lyue in good helthe / that he wolde haue to do whaÌ„ thou shalt die And if it chauÌ„ce that thou haue children by thy seconde husbaÌ„de / thaÌ„ ryseth strife debate at home with iÌ„ thy house Thou shalte nat be at libertie to loue thyne owne childreÌ„ equally / neither to loke indiffereÌ„tly vpoÌ„ them / that thou haste borne thou shalt reache them meat secretly he wil eÌ„uie hym that is deed / excepte thou hate thyn owne childreÌ„ / thou shalt seme to loue their father yet And if he haue childreÌ„ by a nother wyfe / thaÌ„ shall players gesters rayle and gest vpoÌ„ the / as a cruel stepdame If thy stepson be sicke / or his heed ake / thou shalte be diffamed for a witche if thou gyue hym nat meate / thou shalt be accused of cruelte if thou gyue any / thou shalt be called a poysoner What I pray that / hath seconde mariages so pleasaÌ„t / that caÌ„ be able to recoÌ„peÌ„ce these euylles Thus saith saynt Hieronyme As for the preyse of coÌ„tyneÌ„ce chastite / couÌ„sailyng from secoÌ„de mariages / what caÌ„ I be able to say after the eloqueÌ„t fositayne of saint Hieronyme / or that swete dilicates of saynt Ambrose speche Therfore who so desyreth to knowe any thyng of those matters / let hym loke it of them For it longeth nat to my purpose / to recite al theyr sayenges here For I do nat iÌ„teÌ„de to write exortatioÌ„s vnto any kyÌ„de of lyuyng / but to gyue rules / howe they may lyue Neuer the lesse / I wolde couÌ„saile a good woman to coÌ„tinue in holy wydowhed / namely if she haue childreÌ„ which thyng is the inteÌ„t frute of matrimonye But she dout / lest she can nat auoyde the prickes of nature with that life / let her gyue an eare vnto saint Paule thayo stel / writyÌ„g vnto the Corinthies iÌ„ this wife I say to vnmaried women and wydowes / it were good for them / if they kepte them selfe as I am but yet if they caÌ„ nat suffre / let them marie For it is best to marie thaÌ„ bourne And the same apostle writeth vnto Timothe thus Put away yoÌ„ge wydowes / for whan they haue abused them selfe at large / than wolde they mary to Christ / are coÌ„deÌ„ned bicause they haue refused theyr fyrste ê“myse / walke idle from house to house / neither oÌ„ly idle / but tryflyÌ„g bablyng / pratyÌ„g talkyng / suche thynges as be coÌ„meth nat Therfore I wold that the yoÌ„ger shuld marie / bryÌ„g forth childreÌ„ / rule their house / gyue their enmy none occasioÌ„ to say il by them For ther be some / which streight after their coÌ„uersion haue folowed Satanas Yet let them beware / that they do it nat by by aft their husbaÌ„des death For that is a tokeÌ„ that they loued nat them for whose deê‘ting they haue so sone lefte sorowyng / mournyng / al desire of them And if they must ê“uide ought for theyr house or children / let them se to hit before the busynes of maryage and dominioÌ„ of a newe husbaÌ„de And lette them get suche husbandes as be accordynge for wydowes to be maryed vnto / nor yonge men / wanton / hote / and full of playe / ignorante / and riotous / that can neither rule theyr house / nor theyr wyfe / ne theyr selfe neither but take an husbande some thyng past mydle age / sober / sad / and of good wyt / experte with great vse of the worlde whiche with his wisedome may kepe al the house in good ordre whiche by his discretioÌ„ may so temper and gouerne all thyng / that there maye be alwaye at home sober myrthe and obedience / without frowardnes / and the house holde kepte in theyr labour and ductye / without payne / and all thyng clere and holle And lette them were and knowe / that these contentes hym / whose pleasure onely they shall all more esteme / thanne the holle countreys besyde Here endeth the boke called thinstruction of a Christen woman / whiche who so shall rede / shall haue moche / both knowlege / pleasure / and frute by it Imprinted at London in Fletestrete / in the house of Thomas Berthelet nere to the Cundite / at the sygne of Lucrece Cum priuilegio a rege indulto