the libertie of a ioyfull life O swéet tomb of my swéetest Lord while I liue I will stay by thee when I die I will cleaue vnto thée neither aliue nor dead will I euer be drawne from thée Thou art the altar of mercie the temple of trueth the sanctuary of safetie the graue of death and the cradle of eternall life O heauen of my eclipsed sunne receiue into thee this sillie starre that hath nowe also lost all wished light O Whale that hast swallowed my onely Ionas swallowe also me more worthy to be thy pray sith I and not he was the cause of this bloudie tempest O Cesterne of my innocent Ioseph take me into thy drie bottome sith I and not he gaue iust cause of offence to my enraged brethren But alas in what cloud hast thou hidden the light of our way Upon what shoare hast thou cast vp the preacher of all trueth or to what Ismaelite hast thou yéelded the purueyour of our life O vnhappie me why did I not before thinke of that which I now aske why did I leaue him when I heard him thus to lament him nowe that I haue lost him If I had watched with perseuerance either none would haue taken him or they shoulde haue taken me with him But through too much precisenesse in keeping the lawe I haue lost the lawmaker and by being too scrupulous in obseruing his ceremonies I am proued irreligious in loosing himselfe sith I should rather haue remained with the trueth then forsaken it to solemnize the figure The Sabboth could not haue bin prophaned in standing by his corse by which the prophanest thinges are sanctified whose couch doth not defile the cleane but clenseth the most defiled But when it was time to stay I departed When it was too late to helpe I returned and nowe I repent my folly when it cannot be amended But let my heart dissolue into sighes mine eyes melt in teares and my desolate soule languish in dislikes yea let all that I am and haue indure the deserued punishment that if hee were incensed with my fault he may be appeased with my penance and returne vpon the amendement that fled from the offence Thus when hir timorous cōscienec had indited hir of so great an omission hir toong enforced the euidence with these bitter accusations Loue that was now the onely vmpier in all hir causes condemned hir eyes to a freshe showre of teares hir brest to a new storme of sighes and hir soule to be perpetuall prisoner to restlesse sorrowes But O Mary thou deceiuest thy selfe in thy owne desires and it well appeareth that excesse of griefe hath bred in thee a defect of due prouidence And wouldest thou indeed haue thy wishes come to passe and thy wordes fulfilled Tell me then I pray thee if thy heart were dissolued where wouldest thou harbor thy Lord what wouldest thou offer him how wouldst thou loue him Thy eyes haue lost him thy hands cannot féele him thy féet cannot follow him and if he be at all in thée it is thy heart that hath him and wouldest thou now haue that dissolued from thence also to exile him And if thy eyes were melted thy soule in languor and thy senses decayed how wouldest thou see him if he did appeare howe shouldest thou heare him if he did speake howe couldest thou knowe him though hée were there present Thou thinkest happily that hee loueth thée so wel that if thy heart were spent for his loue he would either lend his owne heart vnto thee or create a newe heart in thee better then that which thy sorrow tooke from thée It may bee thou imaginest that if thy soule woulde giue place his soule wanting nowe a body would enter into thine with supplie of all thy senses and release of thy sorrowes O Mary thou didst not marke what thy maister was woont to say when he told thee that the third day he shuld rise againe For if thou hadst heard him or at the least vnderstoode him thou wouldest not thinke but that hée now vseth both his heart and soule in the life of his owne body And therefore repaire to the angels and enquire more of them least thy Lord be displeased that comming from him thou wilt not entertaine them But Marie whose deuotions were all fixed vpon a nobler Saint and that had so straightly bound hir thoughtes to his onely affection that shee rather desired to vnknow whom she knew alreadie then to burthen her mind with the knowledge of newe acquaintance could not make her wil long since possessed with the highest loue stoupe to the acceptance of meaner friendships And for this though she did not scornefully reiect yet did she with humilitie refuse the Angels company thinking it no discourtesie to take her selfe from them for to giue her selfe more wholly to her Lord to whome both shee and they were wholly deuoted and ought most loue and greatest dutie Sorrow also being nowe the onely interpreter of all that sense deliuered to her vnderstanding made hir conster their demand in a more doubtfull then true meaning If saith she they come to ease my affliction they coulde not be ignorant of the cause and if they were not ignorant of it they woulde neuer aske it why then did they say Woman why weepest thou If their question did import a prohibition the necessitie of the occasion doth countermand their counsaile and fitter it were they shoulde wéepe with me then I in not wéeping obey them If the Sunne were ashamed to shew his brightnesse when the father of all lightes was darkened with such disgrace If the heauens discolouring their beauties suted themselues to their makers fortune If the whole frame of nature were almost dissolued to sée the authour of nature so vnnaturally abused why may not Angelles that best knewe the indignitie of the case make vp a part in this lamentable consort And especially nowe that by the losse of his bodie the cause of wéeping is increased and yetthe number of mourners lessened sith the Apostles are fled all his friends afraid and poore I left alone to supplie the teares of all creatures O who will giue water to my head a fountaine of teares vnto my eyes that I may weepe day and night and neuer cease weeping O my only Lord thy griefe was the greatest that euer was in man and my griefe as great as euer happened to woman for my loue hath carued me no small portion of thine thy losse hath redoubled the torment of mine owne and all creatures séeme to haue made ouer to me theirs leauing mee as the vice-gereut of all their sorrows Sorrow with me at the least thou O Tombe and thawe into teares you hardest stones The time is now come that you are licensed to cry and bound to recompence the silence of your Lordes Disciples of whome hée himselfe said to the Pharisies that if they held their peace the verie stones should crie for them Nowe therefore sith feare hath
his death and the day of his resurrection But alas let her heauinesse excuse her and the vnwontednes of the miracle plead her pardon sith dread and amazement hath dulled her senses distempered her thoughts discouraged her hopes awaked her passions and left her no other liberty but onely to wéepe Shée wept therefore being onely able to wéepe And As shee was weeping shee stouped down and looked into the Monument and she saw two Angels in white sitting one at the head and an other at the feete where the body of Iesus had beene layd They said vnto her Woman why wepest thou O Mary thy good hap excéedeth thy hope and where thy last sorrow was bred thy first succour springeth Thou diddest séeke but one and thou hast found two A dead body was thy errand and thou hast light vppon two aliue Thy wéeping was for a man and thy téars haue obtained Angels Suppresse now thy sadnes and refresh thy heart with this good Fortune These angels inuite thée to a parlée they séem to take pitty of thy case and it may be they haue some happy tidinges to tell thée Thou hast hitherto sought in vaine as one either vnséene or vnknown or at the least vnregarded sith the party thou séekest neither tendereth thy teares nor aunswereth thy cries nor relenteth with thy lamentings Either he doth not heare or hée will not helpe he hath peraduenture left to loue thée and is loath to yéelde thée reliefe therefore take such comfort as thou findest sith thou art not so lucky as to finde that which thou couldest wish Remember what they are where they sitte from whence they come and to whom they speake They are Angels of peace neither sent with out cause nor séen but of fauour They sit in the Tombe to shew that they are no straungers to thy losse They come from Heauen from whence all happy newes descend They spake to thy selfe as though they had some speciall Embassage to deliuer vnto thée Aske them therfore of thy maister for they are likeliest to returne thée a desired aunswere Thou knewest him too well to thinke that hell hath deuoured him thou hast long sought and hast not found him in earth and what place so fit for him as to be in heauen Aske therefore of those Angels that came newly from thence and it may be their report will highly please thée Or if thou art resolued to continue thy séeking who can better helpe thée then they that are as swift as thy thought as faithfull as thy owne heart and as louing to thy Lord as thou thy selfe Take therefore thy good hap least it be taken away from thée and content thée with Angels sith thy maister hath giuen thée ouer But alas what meaneth this change how happeneth this strange alteration The time hath béene that fewer teares would haue wrought greater effecte shorter séeking haue sooner found and lesse paine haue procured more pitty The time hath ven that thy annointing his féete was accepted and praised thy washing them with teares highly commended and thy wyping them with thy haire most curteously construed How then doth it now fall out that hauing brought thy swéete oiles to annoint his whole body hauing shed as many teares as would haue washed more then his féet and hauing not only thy haire but thy heart ready to serue him he is not moued with all these duties so much as once to affoorde thée his sight Is it not he that reclaimed thee from thy wandring courses that dispossessed thee of thy damned inhabitants and from the wildes of sinne recouered thee into the folde and family of his flocke was not thy house his home his loue thy life thy selfe his Disciple did not hee defend thée against the Pharisee pleade for thée against Iudas and excuse thée to thy sister In summe was not hee thy patron and protector in all thy necessities O good Iesu what hath thus estranged thée from her Thou hast heretofore so pittied her teares that séeing them thou couldest not refraine thine In one of her greatest agonies for loue of her that so much loued thée thou diddest recall her dead brother to life turning her complaint into vnexpected contentment And we knowe that thou doest not vse to alter course without cause nor to chastice without desert Thou art the first that inuitest and the last that forsakest neuer leauing but first left and euer offering til thou art refused How then hath shée forfaited thy fauour Or with what trespasse hath shée earned thy ill will That shée neuer left to loue thée her heart will depose her hand will subscribe her tongue will protest her teares wil testify and her séeking doth assure And alas is her particular case so farre from all example that thou shouldest rather alter thy nature then shée better her Fortune and be to her as thou art to no other For our parts since thy last shew of liking towardes her we haue found no other faulte in her but that shée was the eareliest vp to séeke thée readiest to annoint thée and when shée saw that thou wert remoued shée forthwith did wéepe for thée and presently went for helpe to finde thée And whereas those two that shée brought being lesse careful of thée then fearefull of themselues when they had séene what shée had sayd sodainely shrunke away behold shée stil staieth shée still séeketh shée still wéepeth If this be a fault we cannot deny but this shée doth and to this shée perswadeth yea this she neither meaneth to amend nor requesteth thée to forgiue if therfore thou reckōnest this as punishable punished shée must be sith no excuse hath effect wher the fact pleadeth guilty But if this import not any offence but a true affection and be rather a good desire then an euil desert why art thou so hard a Iudge to so soft a creature requiting her loue with thy losse and suspending her hopes in this vnhappinesse Are not those thy wordes I loue those that loue mee and who watcheth earely for me shall finde mee Why then doth not this woman finde thée that was vp so early to watch for thée Why doest thou not with like repay her that bestoweth vppon thée her whole loue sith thy word is her warrant and thy promise her due debt Art thou lesse moued with these tears that shée sheddeth for thée her onely Maister then thou wert with those that shée shed before thée for her deceased brother Or doth her loue to thy seruaunt more please thée then her loue to thy selfe Our loue to others must not be to them but to thée in them For he loueth thée so much the lesse that loueth anything with thée that he loueth not for thée If therefore shée then deserued wel for louing thée in an other shée deserueth better now for louing thée in thy selfe and if in déede thou louest those that loue thée make thy worde good to her that is so far in loue with thée Of thy selfe thou hast
place where he is trouble thée sith it cannot be worse then his graue and infinite coniectures make probability that it cannot but be better But suppose that he were yet remaining in earth and taken by others out of his tombe what would it auail thée to know where he were If he bée with such as loue and honor him they will be as wary to kéepe him as they are loth he should be lost and therfore will either often change or neuer confesse the place knowing secresie to be the surest locke to defende so great a treasure If those haue taken him that malice and maligne him thou maist wel iudge him past thy recouery whē he is once in the possession of so cruell owners Thou wouldest happely make sale of thy liuing and séek him by ransome But it is not likely they woulde sell him to be honoured that bought him to be murdered If price would not serue thou wouldest fall to praier But how can praier soften such flint hearts and if they scorned so many tears offered for his life as little will they regard thy intreaty for his corse If neither price nor praier would preuaile thou wouldest attempt it by force But alas séely souldier thy arms are too weak to manage weapons and the issue of thy assault would be the losse of thy selfe If no other way would helpe thou wouldest purloine him by stealth and thinke thy selfe happy in contriuing such a theft O Mary thou art deceiued for malice will haue many lockes and to steale him from a théefe that could steale him from the watch requireth more cunning in the art then thy wāt of practise can affoorde thée Yet if these be the causes that thou enquirest of the place thou she west the force of thy rare affection and deseruest the Laurell of a perfect louer But to féele more of their sweetnes I will pound these spices and dwell a while in the peruse of thy resolute feruour And first can thy loue enrich thée when thy goods are gone or dead corse repay the value of thy ransome Because he had neither bed to be borne in nor graue to be buried in wilt thou therefore rather be poore with him then rich without him Againe if thou hadst to sue to some cruell Scribe or Pharisée that is to a heart boyling in rancor with a heart burning in loue for a thing of him aboue all things detested of thée aboue all thinges desired as his enemie to whome thou suelt and his friend for whom thou intreatest canst thou think it possible for this sute to speed Could thy loue repaire thée from his rage or suche a tyraunt stoupe to a womans teares Thirdly if thy Lord might be recouered by violence art thou so armed in complete loue that thou thinkest it sufficient harnesse or doth thy loue indue thee with such a ludithes spirite or lend thée such Sampsons lockes that thou canst breake open huge gates or foyle whole armies Is thy loue so sure a shield that no blowe can breake it or so sharpe a dint that no force can withstand it Can it thus alter sexe change nature and excéed all Arte But of all other courses wouldest thou aduenture a theft to obtaine thy desire A good déede must be well done and a worke of mercie without breath of iustice It were a sinne to steale a prophane treasure but to steale an annointed prophet can be no lesse then a sacriledge And what greater staine to thy Lord to his doctrine and to thy selfe then to sée thée his Disciple publikely executed for an open theft O Mary vnlesse thy loue haue better warrant then common sence I can hardly sée how such designementes can be approued Approoued saith shee I would to God the execution were as easie as the proofe and I should not so long bewaile my vnfortunate losse To others it séemeth ill to prefer loue before riches but to loue it séemeth worse to preferre any thing before it selfe Cloath him with plates of siluer that shiuereth for cold or fill his purse with treasure that pineth for hunger and sée whether the plates will warm him or the treasure féed him No no he will giue all his plates for a wollen garment and all his mony for a meals meate Euerie supply fitteth not with euery néed and the loue of so swéete a Lord hath no correspondēce in worldly wealth Without him I were poore though Empresse of the worlde With him I were riche though I had nothing else They that haue moste are accounted richest and they thought to haue moste that haue all they desire and therfore as in him alone is the vttermost of my desires so hee alone is the summe of all my substance It were too happie an exchaunge to haue God for goodes and too rich a pouerty to inioy the only treasure of the world If I were so fortunate a begger I woulde disdaine Solomons wealth and my loue being so highly enriched my life shoulde neuer complaine of want And if all I am worth would not reach to his ransome what should hinder me to saek him by intreaty Thogh I were to sue to the greatest tyrant yet the equitie of my sute is more then halfe a grant If many droppes soften the hardest stones why shoulde not many teares supple the moste stonie heartes what anger so fiery that may not be quenched with eye water sith a weeping suppliant rebateth the edge of more then a Lions fury My sute it selfe woulde sue for me and so dolefull a corse woulde quicken pitie in the moste iron heartes But suppose that by touching a ranckled sore my touch should anger it and my petition at the first incense him that heard it he would percase reuile mée in wordes and then his owne iniurie would recoyle with remorse and be vnto me a patron to procéed in my request And if he should accompanie his wordes with blowes and his blowes with wounds it may be my stripes would smart in his guilty minde and his conscience bléede in my bléeding wounds and my innocent bloud so entender his adamant heart that his owne inward feelings would plead my cause and peraduenture obtayne my sute But if through extremity of spite he should happen to kill me his offence might easely redound to my felicity For he would be as carefull to hide whom he had vniustly murdered as him whom he had felonously stollen and so it is like that he would hide me in the same place wher he had layd my Lord and as he hated vs both for one cause him for challenging and me for acknowledging that he was the Messias so would he vse vs both after one manner And thus what comfort my body wanted my soule should enioy in séeing a part of my selfe partner of my Maisters miserye with whome to be miserable I reckon a higher fortune then without him to be most happy And if no other means would serue to recouer him but force I sée no reason why it
might not very well become me None will bar me frō defending my life which the least worme in the right of nature hath leaue to preserue And sith he is to me so deare a life that without him all life is death nature authoriseth my féeble forces to imploy their vttermost in so necessary an attempt Necessity addeth ability loue doubleth necessity and it often happeneth that nature armed with loue and pressed with néede excéedeth it selfe in might and surmounteth all hope in successe And as the equity of the cause doth breath courage into the defendors making them the more willing to fight the lesse vnwilling to die so guilty consciences are euer timerous still starting with sodaine frights and afrayd of their own suspitions ready to yéeld before the assault vppon distrust of their cause and dispaire of their defence Sith therefore to rescue an innocent to recouer a right and to redresse so déep a wrong is so iust a quarrell nature will enhable me loue encourage me grace confirme me and the iudge of all iustice fight in my behalfe And if it séeme vnfitting to my sexe in talke much more in practise to deal with martiall affaires yet when such a cause happeneth as neuer had patterne such effects must follow as are without example There was neuer any body of a God but one neuer such a body stollen but now neuer such a stealth vnreuenged but this Sith therefore the Angels neglect it men forget it O Iudith lend me thy prowesse for I am bound to regard it But suppose that my force were vnable to winne him by an open enterprise what scruple should kéepe me from seeking him by secret means yea and by plain stealth It wilbe thought a sinne and condemned for a theft O swéete sinne why was not I the first that did commit thée Why did I suffer any other sinner to preuent me for stealing from God his honour I was called a sinner and vnder that title was spred my infamy But for stealing God from a false owner I was not worthy to be called a sinner because it had béene too high a glory If this be so great a sinne and so heinous a theft let others make choise of what titles they will but for my part I would refuse to be an Angel I would not wishe to be a Saint I would neuer be estéemed either iust or true and I shoulde be best contented if I might both liue and die such a sinner and be condemned for such a theft When I heard my Lord make so comfortable a promise to the théefe vppon the crosse that he should that day be with him in Paradise I had halfe an enuy at that théefes good Fortune and wished my selfe in the théefes place so I might haue enioyed the fruite of his promise But if I could be so happy a théefe as to commit this theft if that wish had takeu effect I would now vn wishe it againe and scorne to be any other théef then my self sith my booty could make me happier then any other théefes felicity And what though my felony should be called in question in what respect should I néede to feare They would say that I loued him too well But that were soone disproued sith where the worthinesse is infinite no loue can be inough They would obiect that I stole an others goods and as for that many sure titles of my interest would aucree him to be mine and his dead corse would rather speak then witnesses should faile to depose so certaine a truth And if I had not a speciall right vnto him what shuld moue me to venture my life for him No no if I were so happy a felone I shoulde fear no temporal araignmēt I should rather feare that the Angels woulde cite me to my aunswere for preuenting them in the theft sith not the highest Seraphin in heauē but would déeme it a higher stile then his owne to be the théefe that had committed so glorious a robbery But alas thus stand I deuising what I would do if I knew any thing of him and in the meane time I neither know who hath him nor where they haue bestowed him and stil I am forced to dwell in this aunswere that They haue taken away my Lord and I know not wher they haue put him While Marie thus lost her selfe in a Laberinth of doubtes watering her wordes with teares and warming them with sighes séeing the Angels with a kind of reuerēce rise as though they had done honour to one behinde her She turned backe and she saw Iesus standing but that it was Iesus she knewe not O Marie is it possible that thou hast forgotten Iesus faith hath written him in thy vnderstanding loue in thy will both feare and hope in thy memorie and how can all these registers be so cancelled that so plainly séeing thou shouldest not know the contentes For him onely thou tyrest thy féete thou bendest thy knées thou wringest thy handes For him thy heart throbbeth thy brest sigheth thy tongue complaineth For him thy eye wéepeth thy thought sorroweth thy wholebody fainteth and thy soule languisheth In summe there is no part in thée but is busie about him c notwithstanding all this hast thou nowe forgotten him His countenance auourheth it his voyce assureth it hys woundes witnesse it thy owne eyes beholde it and doest thou not yet beléeue that this is Iesus Are thy sharp séeing eies become so weake sighted that they are dazeled with the sunne and blinded with the light But there is such a showre of teares betwéene thée and him and thy eyes are so dimmed with wéeping for him that though thou seest the shape of a man yet thou canst not discerne him Thy eares also are still so possessed with the dolefull Eccho of his last spéeches which want of breath made him vtter in a dying voyce that the force loudnesse of his liuing wordes maketh thee imagine it the voice of a stranger and therefore as hée séemeth vnto thée so like a stranger hee asketh this question of thée O woman why weepest thou whom seekest thou O desire of heart and onely ioy of her soule why demandest thou why shée wéepeth or for whome she séeketh But a whilesince she saw thée hir only hope hanging on a trée with thy head full of thornes thy eies full of teares thy eares full of blasphemies thy mouth full of gall thy whole person mangled and disfigured and doest thou aske her why shee wéepeth Scarse thrée daies passed she beheld thy arms and legs racked with violent pulles thy hands and féete boared with nails thy side wounded with a speare thy whole body torne with stripes and goared in bloud and doest thou hir only griefe aske hir why shée wéepeth She beheld thee vppon the crosse with many teares most lamentable cries yeelding vp her ghost that is thy own ghost alas askest thou why she weepeth And now to make vp hir misere hauing but one