raigne Our abhominable sins inflame thy wrath and thy wrath inflameth this fire against vs. Heere thou hast no presence of compassion none of comfort none but simply of indignation and wrath Heere thy wrath will bee so inexorable that if all the Angels if the whole court of heauen should intreat thee prostrate vpon their faces for one drop of water to refresh one part of a tormented sinner for a very short moment of time they should not obtaine thou wouldest not bee entreated LORD let me neuer heare this terrible voice let me neuer feele this weight of thy wrath albeit I haue iust cause to feare it For I haue beene ouercome I haue yeelded to the sway of my sottish sensuality I haue disobeyed thee I haue rebelled against thee I haue deserued I haue prouoked thy displeasure against mee And now my conscience quaketh and formeth many fearefull representations to my soule Mee thinkes I see thee come furiously vpon me thy wrath me thinkes is euen now ready to strike But stay patient LORD hold thy hand forbeare a while giue mee leaue to collect my astonished and dispersed thoughts to erect my soule and direct it to thee Before thou commest in iustice to ouerwhelme mee with thy wrath In Iustice heare what I haue to say for my selfe Regard the silent sobs which my feeble soule surprised with feare sendeth foorth regard the broken voice which my trembling tongue addresseth to thee VERS II. Haue mercy vpon mee O LORD for I am weake heale me LORD for my bones are troubled 1 THe first weakenesse of a sinner 2 Wherefore the fall of man repaired and not of Angels 3 A second weakenesse 4 A third weakenesse 5 When misery may sue to Iustice when to Mercy 6 The minde worketh bodily effects 7 How the goodnesse of GOD is said to hurt 8 A prayer HAue mercy vpon me O LORD Haue mercy vpon mee Hold thy hand O mercifull LORD Oh my GOD What wilt thou doe What Wilt thou make proofe of thy prowesse against my weakenesse thinkest thou that I am come to combate with thee to defie thy fury to wrestle with thy wrath LORD I am weake I am wretchedly weake because my weakenesse is inclinable to euill I am weake in resisting outward prouocations weake in resisting the pleasures of mine owne appetites and desires This weakenesse is miserable in me but hath alwaies been strong to mooue thee to mercy For wherefore else hast thou repaired the sinne of man and not of Angels Verely because man sinned through weakenes of nature but the sinne of Angels proceeded meerely from malice of will For with the more frailty a sinne is committed the lesse doth it participate of will and the lesse voluntary a sinne is the readier is thy mercy to relieue And therefore seeing thou forgauest Adame whose nature was entire forgiue me also I beseech thee whose nature is corrupt and enclineable to euill seeing also thou wert mercifull to him who charged his fault vpon another be fauouable O LORD to me who accuse and condemne only my selfe For this cause therefore I will speake vnto my LORD albeit I am but dust and ashes LORD thou hast made me and thou knowest of what temper I am made For no man is ignorant of his proper work Thou hast not made my nature of brasse my sinewes are not of yron nor my strength of steele but thou hast made me of fraile flesh yeeldable to all occasions of euill My soule thou hast placed in this case of clay as in a boate driuen with the strong tyde of sensuall appetites which cannot be caried against that streame but by great labor by strong striuing with armes and with Oares LORD I do not lay forth this weaknes of mine to excuse my sin but to encline thee to mercy For the LORD is merciful to them that feare him because he knoweth wherof we be made he remembreth that we are but dust I haue sinned indeed but rather through weaknes then either malice or proud presumption rather through a vicious and corrupt disposition infused as an inheritance from my ancestors then through hellish either haughtinesse or hate originally in my â—elfe Wherefore then hidest thou thy face and takest me for thine enemie Wilt thou vse thy strength against a leafe against dry stubble Wilt thou pursue a smoke a shadow a thing of nothing Haue mercy vpon me O LORD for I am weake Not only to fall but much more in rising from my fall in repairing my state in recouering thy loue and fauour againe This I can no waies doe by my naturall strength no wayes without thy speciall power I am able to offend thee to fetter my feete in the snares of sinne to bring my selfe into danger of thy wrath but to appease thee to free releeue my selfe I am altogether vnable I can cast my selfe into the deepe pit of perdition but come forth and returne backe by my owne forces I cannot And therefore I still straine my voyce vnto thee Haue mercy vpon me O LORD for I am weake Weake in falling weake in rising but most weake I am either to encounter or endure thy wrath Gracious GOD I prostrate my selfe at the feete of thy mercy I creepe vnder the wing of thy compassion I deale not with thy iustice I tremble to thinke of it It is with thy mercy and compassion that I haue to doe Correct mee in fauour but not in furie to my instruction scourge me but not to my destruction Alas my weakenesse hath made mee sinfull and my sinnes haue made me miserable and my misery now sueth to thy mercy If my misery were without sinne then I would plead it before thy iustice thy iustice would then relieue my case but for that it proceedeth from my sinne I lay my plea at the barre of thy mercy Haue mercy vpon mee O LORD for I am weakâ— I am not able to beare thy iustice I am not able to behold it I am so farre vnable to endure the force of thy wrath that the feare thereof hath almost vndone me It hath possessed euery part of my body It maketh my feeble flesh to tremble it doeth torment my very bones For vnfained feare and griefe of minde will soone worke effects in the body because the body and the soule are so firmly and familiarly knit together that whatsoeuer ioy or griefe happeneth to the one it is forthwith communicated to the other euen as in two roomes ioined together whatsoeuer motion or stirre is in the one it is easilie sensible in the other Blessed LORD thou art alwayes good thou hurtest no man vnlesse himselfe be in the blame vnlesse it be through his owne default For as the Sun beame is cleare and comfortable in it selfe and so is it to the eye that is sound yet to a sore eye it is very grieuous not through any default in the Sunne but by the diseased disposition of the eye so albeit thou
to kindle O desire of my soule thou knowest my tribulations my thoughts lie naked in thy sight thou seest how for thee my heart sorroweth my breast sigheth mine eie weepeth my body fainteth and my soule languisheth And wherfore tariest thou wherfore dost thou prolong my longing wherefore dost thou martyr me with delay VVhy sufferest thou me thus long to be vexed Is the cause heereof in thee or is it in my selfe Are thy mercies spent is thy louing kindnesse at an end wilt thou no more bee intreated by sinners or am I only cancelled out of thy conceit No no I doe not so feelinglie want thee I doe not so ardentlie desire thee as my case requires Verelie the cause is in my selfe and not in thee There is some trespasse in my teares my sorrow is seasoned with some sinne thou seest some cause for which I cannot see thee else wouldest thou not thus estrange thy selfe else thus thou wouldest not giue me ouer I am rather vnworthy to entertaine thee then thou vnwilling to come vnto mee VVell then I will still stir vp the coales of my dull deuotion I will heape on more fewell I will not cease blowing vntill it rise to a full and constant flame I will not entreat onely but I will importune thee I will wrestle with thee as Iacob did with the Angel I will not let thee goe vntill thou blesse me VERS IIII. Turne thee O LORD and deliuer my soule Oh saue me for thy mercies sake 1 A Prayer 2 The pleasures of this life how vnprofitable they are 3 The great distance betweene GOD and a sinner 4 How brought together 5 How grieuous it is to be separate from GOD. 6 An earnest desire of the soule after GOD. 7 The absence of GOD worse then his anger 8 How GOD is to be desired 9 What mooueth GOD to pitie and relieue 10 The great mercy of GOD. 11 To whom his mercy is properly due 12 Mercy to sinners is a due 13 GOD is most liberall and wherefore 14 How wee should desire GOD to turne to vs his face O Come mercifull LORD come and turne vpon me thy fauourable face come exercise vpon me the worke of mercie Regard me not as sinfull but as sorrowfull for my sin punish not my offences but pity the weaknesse from whence they proceed pity the distresse whereinto they haue cast me pitifullie regard my weakenesse and distresse For I feele my soule plunged in a vast sea of sinne I feele how fast it sinketh how violentlie it is swallowed I haue greedily grasped at the floating comforts of this life but I finde no stay in them I finde they rather pester then releeue me I finde them like a flash of lightning in a darke stormy night which serueth to shew the present infelicity and to increase the horror of ensuing darknesse And therefore doe I now streine out my voice and stretch foorth my hand vnto thee for helpe Gladlie would I turne to thee but I am not able for there is so great a distance betweene a sinner and thee that by his owne forces he cannot return and come neere thee Depart from thee and adhere to euill of our selues we may but we cannot forsake euill and turne to thee but by thy speciall power No man by his proper vertue is able to saue and consequently to iustifie himselfe thy grace must alwaies preuent him thou must first call him before he be able to cal vpon thee The beginning of our conuersion must be from thee from thy preuenting and inciting grace And therefore turne to me and then shall I be turned to thee Turne vnto me not by any change in thy selfe for thou art immutable but turne to me by thy goodnesse and grace and I will turne to thee by repentance and amendment of life Oh! how grieuous is it to bee separated and estranged from thee what good can comfort what euill will not annoy when thou art turned away Thou art the rock of my faint faith the anchor of my wauering hope the center of my languishing desire and loue In thee I trust vpon thee I relye I am so earnest in desiring thee that I neither desire nor almost thinke vpon any other thing But where art thou In what cloud doest thou hide thy selfe what meanest thou to suspend thy comfort so long to punish my desire so much with delay Wherefore hidest thou thy face and takest me for thine enemie Albeit thou art angrie with me yet would not I haue thee depart from me I had rather enioy thee angrie then not at all because thou art most extreamely angrie when thou turnest from vs. When thou art angrie and present then doest thou instruct vs then reforme vs but when thou turnest from vs then thou giuest vs ouer then thou leauest vs to innumerable and vnauoidable euils Albeit my friends forsake me albeit my enemies persecute me albeit all the societies of men and of Diuels tumult against mee yet doe not thou forsake me doe not thou depart from me For woe to them from whom thou departest But take heed O troubled soule and consider well what thou requirest of the LORD Art not thou a sinner a grieuous sinner is not GOD a searcher of sinnes a grieuous punisher of grieuous sinnes Doest thou not pray to him to turne away his face from thy sinnes Did not holy Iob say where shall I hide me from thy countenance because I haue sinned And wouldest thou haue him turne his face to thee being a most heynous sinner Yes yes I know well enough what I desire I know that GOD hath more faces then one He hath a face of Maiestie which no man can see and liue This face I cannot see He hath a face of iustice This face I would not see It is terrible to sinners this face is vpon them who doe euill to destroy their memoriall from the earth But hee hath another face of compassion and mercie And this face is like the Sunne exceeding full both of beautie and of vertue This face hee hideth from sinners This face I desire to be displayed vpon me be it neuer so cloudie neuer so angrie the anger of this face is to make sinners pure LORD make this face to shine vpon mee and be mercifull to mee LORD this face doe I seeke oh hide not thou thy face from mee nor cast away thy seruant in displeasure Come come gracious LORD with-hold no longer O water of life O shower of our saluation distill into mee one drop of thy dewe Seeing I am nothing without thee let me taste the benefit of being thine I desire thee and not thine for thy selfe not for thy gifts I desire thee onely not thee for any thing nothing for thee nothing with thee nothing beside thee Come deliuer my soule from the chaines of sinne wherewith I am bound to satisfie the rigour of thy iustice by eternall death and damnation Deliuer me from long custome
wickednesse shall haue no opportunitie to vndermine my weakenes If a building be weak and the walls decline a smal force is suâ—ficient to prostrate it to the ground But our weake nature detorted from originall Iustice and much empaired by frequencie of sinne is alwaies prone and enclinable to euill the Imagination of mans heart is euill euen from his youth And therefore I will auoid all outward occasions that may attract me to euill among which familiar conuersing with euill men is the chiefe For if two contraries be applied together the stronger must necessarilie destroy the weaker But as we are more enclinable to vice then to vertue so vice is more strong in the wicked then vertue in the good whereby it followeth that the societie of euill men is most dangerous to the good and that as an hundred sound men shall sooner take the plague from one infected person then he recouer his health by them so the good are more often peruerted by the wicked then the wicked conuerted by the good For this cause GOD loueth nor to see his children among the wicked For this cause hee commanded his people that they should not ioyne in marriage with the Gentiles Exo. 34. For this cause also he commaunded them to destroy the inhabitants of the countrey which they were to possesse lest by societie in their conuersation they should be drawne into societie of their sinnes as afterwards they were indeed Elihu marueiled at Iob and the Apostle at the Philippians that among the wicked they could liue well Lot who liued in Sodome needed the hand of an Angel to draw him foorth Saint Peter being in the company of the other Apostles confessed the LORD to be the Sonne of GOD but denied him in Caiphas house when he stood among the wicked by the fire GOD commanded that no man should touch any creature that was vncleane and that whosoeuer touched a dead body he shoud be vncleane But no creature is so vncleane as a sinner no death is like to the death of sinne And therefore I will auoid wicked men as the most vncleane of liuing creatures and the most loathsome of those that are dead I will not regard either kindred or kind acquaintance I will esteeme all the wicked alike I will cast off my neere friends I will pull out my eyes I will cut off my hands rather then they shall draw me to euill I will rather liue in desarts and caues rather with dragons and vipers then in the society of those that are euill I will not touch these pitchy companions I will not in the least matters haue to deale with them If a small rupture in a bancke be not timelie stopped it will weare greater and all the valley will be surrownded thereby Of the seede of a serpent commeth the cockatrice and of small beginnings dangerous effects may ensue I will not therefore bee negligent in smallest matters I will not contemne any enemy He that despiseth small things by lâ—ttle and little shall decay The wine saith the Prophet is mixed with water Verely as wine mingled with water looseth both sweetnes strength so the good loose credit vertue by society with the euill But as a man who standeth vpon firme ground will cast foorth boords and lines to saue such as are in danger of drowning and yet will not approach so neere as to be drowned with them so I will affoord the wicked what helpes I can for their safety but will haue an eie that they fasten not vpon mee that they draw me not into their destruction Away from me also all yee mine enemies who intend any wickednesse against mee take away your malice for your mischiefe is at an end The LORD is now at peace with me hee hath put vp the sword of his iustice he hath giuen to me his mercifull hand In vaine shall you now either attempt against mee or insult ouer me It is not onely vanity but iniquity which now you shall contriue against me You shall neuer effect your euill intentions Hate me you may but harme me you cannot You shall neuer preuaile against him who hath preuailed against the Almighty My teares haue ouercome the Omnipotent the voice of my teares hath vanquished the inuincible These luke-warme droppes haue quenched GODS anger qualified his iustice recouered his mercy won his loue True teares are the language of heauen they speake strongly to GOD he heareth them well No voice hath more free and familiar accesse to him none is more acceptable none better vnderstood Hee who often regardeth not the voice of the tongue will alwaies heare the voice of our teares The voice of the tongue is framed in the mouth but the voice of teares proceeds from a heart surprised either with ioy or with griefe Hee who regardeth onely the heart doth much regard this language of the heart Therefore in all the anguishes of my soule I will vse few words heereafter but powre forth my sorrow in silent teares whensoeuer I sin I will write my supplication for pardon with teares whensoeuer I would obtaine any curtesie or fauour from GOD I will addresse my desire with teares Teares are too mighty Orators to let any suit fall When teares crie vnto GOD when hee is importuned by teares he will presently grow familiar with vs. They haue so perswading a silence so conquering a complaint that by entreating they command by yeelding they ouercome When they seeme most pitifull then are they most powerfull when they seeme most forsaken then are they most victorious This dew of deuotion neuer falleth but it is an assured signe of a beautifull day euen of GODS fauour to cleere vpon vs. Vpon what face soeuer it droppeth it maketh the same amiable in the eies of GOD. I will not therefore giue ouer my weeping my face must bee still adorned with these liquid pearles the Angels shall still bathe themselues in these streames of my eies vntill death damme vp the springs they shall not cease running But heerein vse some caution O my soule for that thy teares may be profitable that they may be more acceptable to GOD they must not proceede from a softnesse and tendernesse of nature but thou must powre foorth thy very heart in teares They must not proceed from any worldly respect not from feare of death or of hell not absolutely from loue of thy selfe but from loue towards GOD and from griefe for offending so good a Father so great a Lord so pure a perfection and glorie This loue is the fire wherwith these siluer drops are melted in the furnace wherewith the flowers of deuotion and grace are distilled into teares This loue is the sun which resolueth dark pitchie clouds into raine which resolueth thicke foggie mists into dew and maketh the ayre pleasant and cleere Without this loue teares are nothing but excrementall water they are nothing worth if they be not warmed and
are both troublesome and imperfect 3 The excellency of the knowledge of GOD. 4 We are most ignorant of our selues 5 Wherefore this word know thy selfe was written vpon the gates of Apolloes Temple 6 How excellent and difficult it is to know our selues 7 The good which GOD worketh out of our sinnes 8 He that is sinfull and secure is doubly miserable 9 Some things are absoultely good but nothing absolutely euill 10 The LORD is sayd to bee a hard man and wherefore 11 The appellation and parts of this Psalme THIS is the second penitentiall Psalme intitled by some The vnderstanding by others The instruction of Dauid Partly for that he instructed others therby but chiefllie for that he declared that he had receiued instruction and was brought to vnderstand both GOD and himselfe Which is the perfectioÌ„ of all other as wel diuine as humane knowledge Other knowledges bring an endlesse labour to the minde because the more we know the more we are desirous to know But they doe not pacifie the debates they doe not cure the diseases that are within vs. They make a man learned but not good skilfull but not wise I say more They doe but make a man know how little he knowes because all our knowledge consisteth in knowing our ignorance and the most that a man can know of any Science in this world is but the least part of that whereof he is ignorant But the knowledge of GOD is the foundation of our Spirituall building the first wheele of the clocke the first moueable spheare which causeth the motion of all the rest We are created in this world to the end that we should serue GOD But wee cannot serue him vnlesse we loue him vnlesse also wee feare him and we can neither loue nor feare him vnlesse we know him euen as some rurall people haue not onely not honoured but rudely intreated their Prince comming by aduenture and vnknowen among them But it is not sufficient to beleeue that there is a GOD to haue a confused knowledge of him vnlesse we know what he is to vs what we are to him vnles we put of our shooes that is al worldly affections GOD wil not manifest himselfe to vs. But this done the knowledge of his goodnes will make vs to loue him of his Iustice to feare him of his Maiestie to honour him of his Mercie to hope in him of his Wisedome to obey him My eye seeth thee saith Iob and therefore I repent in dust and ashes As the Philistines did first put out Sampsons eyes and then tooke him forth to sport with him so the diuell first laboureth either to extinguish or to shadow this our Spiritual fight then playeth at pleasure with vs. And now againe Albeit nothing bee so neere vs as our selues yet the knowledge of our selues is furthest from vs. There is nothing almost that wee lesse vnderstand then our selues For as our bodily eyes behold other obiects but not themselues so the eye of our minde namely our vnderstanding is apt to apprehend other things but not it selfe It is nimble to discouer strong and bold to iudge other matters but is defectiue both in sight to discerne and in iudgement to esteeme it selfe For this cause the ancient Philosophers affirme that this voice 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Know thy selfe was first sounded from heauen For this cause it was written in golden letters vpon the doore of Apollo's Temple either because it is proper onely to GOD or because it is the highest wisedome whereto man can aspire or because it is the onely entrance to the knowledge and seruice of GOD. For albeit GOD may be seene in all his creatures yet especially in our selues who beare his Image Thou seekest GOD abroad but enter the secret chambers of thy soule and there he may most readily be found The better thou knowest thy selfe the better thou knowest GOD because the knowledge of thy selfe will lead thee to the knowledge of GOD. Assuredly no knowledge is more high none more hard and hidden then the knowledge of our selues â—f I were perfect saith Iob yet know I not my owne soule Man hath no brighter glasse no learneder booke to looke on then himselfe The true studie of man is man All other knowledge without this is defectiue Hee that spendeth his spirits to attaine the knowledge of other things and neuer collecteth them to search know and iudge himselfe remaines the most sencelesse Sott in the world Other knowledge puffeth vp but this humbleth and pulleth downe For humâ—litie is nothing else but a true contempt of our selues which proceedeth from the knowledge of our selues so as the knowledge of our selues is the forme of humilitie and consequently of all other vertues which are deriued from humilitie And this great benefite did the mercie of GOD bring to Dauid by reason of his sinne To vnderstand his owne weakenesses and wants to vnderstand by whom he must be supported in the one and supplied in the other To vnderstand I say both GOD and himselfe The fall of Dauid did extinguish in him all puffie pride it shaked vp his sensuall or rather sencelesse securitie it made him neuer to presume vpon his owne strength but in all temptations and afflictions to trust truely to the power and goodnesse of GOD and to hope for no helpe no stay but onely from his all-powerfull grace Hee that is sinfull and yet secure is doubly miserable miserable in his sinne but more miserable in his securitie And thus GOD neuer suffereth euill but for some great and secret good euen as Moses had said He caused him to sucke honie out of the rocke and oyle out of the hardest stone O the infinite wisedome and power of GOD out of the drie and ragged rocke of our sinnes hee draweth the sweet sappe of humilitie from vs and of mercie from himselfe to the sweet safetie and felicitie of our soules Assuredly some things may bee so good as that they haue no mixture of euill yet nothing can be so absolutely euill but some good ariseth from it And hence it is that the LORD calleth himselfe a hard-man who reapeth where he did not sow and gathereth where he did not disperse But most righteous and vpright LORD How standeth this with the square of Iustice It is hard indeed but how is it iust to reap where thou didst not sow gather where thou diddest not disperse Verely thou sowest not the seeds of our sinnes our sinnes are the tares which the Diuell soweth among the wheate and yet thou reapest out of them both good to thy seruants and glorie to thy selfe By our sinnes thou doest bring vs to vnderstand our selues and to search after thee to know our owne exceeding weakenesse and miserie and to acknowledge thine infinite goodnesse wisedome and power to abandon and renounce the one to trust entirely to the other Now this Psalme is most fitly termed a Penitentiall Psalme because it treateth chiefely
did not accuse my selfe vnto thee I did not returne to thee I did not put my selfe into thy hands for helpe I complayned for my calamities but not for the cause of my calamities I complayned for the punishment of my sinnes but I neuer thought of my sinnes themselues I had onely so much good left as to see my present euill and to languish in my distresse my consuming encreased my complaints and my complaints encreased my consuming but I could not spie any sparke of comfort These calamities didst thou execute vpon mee to draw me to a higher to driue mee to a deeper consideration of my selfe For as in diseases the first degree to recouery is the finding of the originall cause so in troubles and distresses there is small hope of helpe vnlesse we discerne from what fountaine they flow And therefore thou doest often presse vs with a heauie hand that we should vnderstand our rebellion against thee that we should both know and confesse our offences that we should disburthen our consciences of that loathsome loade which otherwise would poyson our soules to death This is the cause of our calamities and from hence must begin our reliefe So thou didst send firie Serpents among thy people in their passage through the deserts which ceased not to sling them to death vntill they did confesse their sinnes And for this cause thou didst call Adam in Paradise not for that thou knewest not where he was but to giue him occasion to acknowledge his transgression The Diuell thou didst not call Thou gauest sentence against the Diuell vncalled vnheard because his will was inflexible hee could not repent he would not confesse that hee had done euill But thou didst call man because hee could acknowledge his sinne Because man hath a power to repent his offences and confesse them to thee it pleaseth thee still by diuers meanes and occasions to call vs. But assuredly the most powerfull meanes the most violent voyce to call vs to thee is by aduersity more sinners are turned to thee by aduersity then by prosperity by feare then by loue by shame then by hope Sinners for the most part are like to the spring of the Sun in Sicilie which at midday is very cold at midnight exceeding hot We grow cold by prosperity but by calamities our deuotion is enflamed As much feeding vpon sweet meates maketh the body drowsie and dull so the mind pastured with pleasures becommeth pestered and heauy in the actions of vnderstanding and yeeldable to the command of sensuality and sloth Hence it followeth that it is a great mercy of GOD to be trauailed and euen tired with labour in this life It is a true token of his loue it is a sure signe that hee hath not giuen vs ouer that he is desirous to conuert vs to him Man is like the earth which vnlesse it bee torne vp with the plough vnlesse it bee harrowed digged and raked bringeth foorth wilde weeds and little else Troubles are GODS husbandrie vpon vs. To be spurned by all to bee a marke whereat all men aime their arrowes to be pressed with wants to bee oppressed with wrongs to haue our life perpetually run in a rugged way are good assurances or rather effects both of his loue and of his care They are the whips which make madde sinners sober they are the batterie which enforce obstinate and rebellious hearts to yeeld to the seruice and subiection of GOD they are the arrowes which GOD hath taken out of the quiuer of his mercy and winged with the fire of his Loue. To pierce and to warme our hard icie hearts he hath tempered his arrowes of tribulation with mercy and enflamed them with his Loue. VERS IIII. For thy hand is heauy vpon me day and night and my moisture is like the drought in Summer 1 GODS heauy hand vpon sinners 2 Feare how terrible an enemy it is 3 Her innumerable forces 4 Her cruell charge 5 The sinner vanquished and ready to yeeld 6 But is releeued by Faith 7 Her encouragements 8 Feare not to be feared 9 Hell fire created not onely for punishment but for terrour 10. Who haue greatest cause to feare 11 The number of the Elect not small 12 Wherein the workes of Mercy exceede the workes of Iustice. 13 The multitude and grieuousnesse of sinnes no cause to dismay vs. 14 Mercy not only preserueth vs from the harme of sin but turneth the harme of sinne to our good 15 Sorrow expelleth feare and begetteth ioy 16 A sinner ouercharged with sorrow 17 Her sad encounter 18 Ingratitude an odious offence 19 The sinner ready to sinke vnder sorrow 20 But is erected by Faith and by Hope 21 Their comforts 22 Contrition is the bruising of a soule betweene feare and griefe 23 The multitude of GODS benefits may much assure vs. 24 We must not leaue our repentance vnperfect 25 Sinnes are like a burning ague TO this end didst thou beare a heauy hand ouer me thy punishments did presse me very sore thou didst multiply many miseries without intermission vpon me Thou diddest cast many rugged rubbes in the smoothest passage of my affaires thou didst beat vpon my body with variety of infirmities but especially thou diddest lay an intolerable load vpon my soule My soule thou diddest both charge and torment with a mountanous heape of dolours and feares whereof I was vnable either to sustaine the weight or endure the griefe Before me were the multitude of my sinnes behind me the hideous horrour of them on the one side feares approaching on the other hopes abandoning aboue Iustice threatning beneath vengeance expecting within agony and anguish of soule without terrours disconsolation dread and almost a hellish darkenesse of despaire For thou diddest not only enuiron and assaile me with furious feares but thou diddest heape discomforts vpon me thou diddest cut off the supply of thy sweet consolations thou diddest drie vp or restraine the influence of thy grace wherby I should haue been both animated and aided in my distresse thou wouldest not affoord me one beame of fauor Oh! what a cruell enemie is feare Shee marcheth with inumerable troupes in her traine ranged in order armed at all points and shaking their terrible instruments of death Iustice carrieth the ensigne before her despaire soundeth the loud alarme disconsolation trembling distrust with all the curses threats of the Law with all the examples of GODS weighty wrath present the first charge She marshalleth al creatures in squadrōs against vs al our friends she draweth to her part our secret thoughts she mustereth on her side She hath a thousand treacherous intelligencies within our owne bosome which await but hower and occasion to surprise vs. Thus aduancing her selfe in the pride of her power with a high and horrible voice she cried vnto me Come foorth thou fugitiue Come thou deiected thou reiected traitour tell me Wretch Where now is thy assurance Who shall defend thee whither wilt thou retire Goe too now Goe
obstinacy He raised thee from thy fall by his power he instructed he enlightened thee with his wisdome he brought thee from the tempestuous sea of this world to the port of a calme conscience and planted thee in a land of religious conuersation Yet thou notwithstanding either vnmindfull or vnkind hast exalted thy heart and thereby lost that wisedome which should haue made thy worship and seruice acceptable to the LORD Thou knowing his will hast beene negligent in performing the same albeit thou knowest that Cursed is hee who doeth the worke of the LORD negligently Yea thou hast not done it at all thou hast manifestly and manifoldly transgressed his will and therefore art most worthy to be beaten with many stripes Thou hast forsaken his seruice who is so bountifull that he rewards a cup of cold water with eternall life and thou hast serued sinne which giueth no wages but death but eternall death Oh wofull wages it were far better to goe vnpaid and serue for nothing O Lucifer who saidest in thy heart I will climbe vp into heauen Thou must humble thy selfe so low as hell or else neuer looke to encounter mercy Knowest thou not that rebellious ingratitude giueth limits to mercy where else were iustice Who should receiue iudgement if mercy did alwaies wait vpon sinners Goe to then deiect thy selfe abiect wretch creepe among moathes and wormes abase thy self to the very gates of despaire in regard of this thy obstinate vnkindnesse Open thy vnderstanding draw all pensiue conceits greedily into thy soule and pine away in a consuming langour Sith thou hast lost thy ioy make much of thy sorrow sith thou hast no comfort but in complaints bestow them largely Oh! what a heauie burthen is heauinesse to the soule It is more ponderous then the whole masse of the earth It is more poisonous then the breath of the Cockatrice It murmureth against GOD It prouoketh to blaspheme It prouoketh to despaire It turneth all matter of solace and ioy into mountaines of lead to weigh vs downe It admitteth neither contentment nor quiet But as to many sicke persons all sweet things seeme bitter so to those who are vnder the arrest of heauinesse all meanes either of delight or of comfort are turned to matter of torment and disquiet And verely my miserie did so deepelie drowne my memorie and whole minde in sorrow that all the remembrance of GODs promises lay ouerwhelmed with the thicke throng of discomfortable thoughts and heauinesse would haue altogether ouerborne and beaten me downe had not Faith and her sweet sister Hope come to my reliefe and with most comfortable countenance and speech thus sustained me So so this worketh kindly and as it should this working of the medicine giueth very good assurance of health Alasse weake wretched sinners how are ye deceiued by your sottish sence The poisonous pleasures of sinne which bane the soule you sweetly swallow without distaste but you cannot rellish feare and sorrow the principall expellers of this poison At these you make a sowre face you can no waies enforce them downe Whereas a soule once infected with sinne cannot possibly be recouered to the state of Grace but it must first be bruised and broken betweene feare and griefe as a graine of corne is grinded betweene two milstones And this moouing of the soule betweene feare and griefe referred to GOD maketh a broken and contrite heart which he doth neuer despise And this is that contrition which is the first part of true Repentance O louely feare O sweet sorrow O happy hand which was so heauie vpon thee suffred thee not to lie sencelesse in thy sinnes heaping to thy selfe wrath against the day of wrath Let it be a comfort a great ioy vnto thee that this heauy hand hath raised and pulled thee out of the ordure of thy sinnes If heretofore thou hast beene vnthankefull be thankfull now and thy former vnthankefullnesse shall not be remembred The multitude of his benefits is so far from dismaying that it may much assure thee For he who hath so loued thee will not now leaue thee He who hath begun his worke in thee will in time expedient expedite the same VVhat is more vsuall in noble natures then to follow their owne fauours then to loue those most vpon whom they haue bestowed greatest benefits to heape many honours vpon such as haue beene first aduanced by them And hath not the most noble nature said that To them who haue more shall be giuen Againe what naturall cause beginneth a worke and leaueth the same vnfinished The vertue of seed ceaseth not in the leafe not in the flower vntill it hath brought foorth seed to a perfect ripenesse The bird neuer forsaketh her yong vntill shee see them able both to flie and to prouide for themselues Doeth nature compell inferiour causes to perfect their effects and shall not the cause of all causes bee mooued by his most infinite goodnesse and loue to finish the worke which hee hath begunne Are not all the workes of the mighty GOD perfect Hath not the same infinite goodnesse and loue sayd It is my worke to doe the will of him that sent mee that I should make perfect his worke Feare not then hee who hath begun to loue thee will neuer change but will persist to loue thee to the end the same goodnesse that moued him to conferre many gifts and blessings vpon thee will mooue him to perfect all by giuing thee euerlasting life For wherefore did he turne thy heart from sinne wherefore did hee prouoke thee to Repentance but because hee purposed to make thee cleane But as thou doest expect that GOD will not leaue his worke vnfinished in thee so breake not off thy worke in the middest with him Thou hast attayned to contrition in a moderate degree but rest not there proceed now to confesse thy sinnes which is the second part of true Repentance For sinnes are like a burning aguâ— which commonly breaketh foorth at the lippes So long as the heat remayneth within it searcheth and anguisheth all the entrailes but when it breaketh foorth at the lippes it is an assured signe of health Goe with vs then and wee will bring thee before his presence Acknowledge there thy sinnes Hide none of thy transgressions from him Leaue feare behinde for milde and mercifull is the LORD hee turneth to those who turne vnto him but take sorrow with thee and season thy confession therewith Sorrow will make thy confession not only not offensiue but pleasing to him VERSE V. I will acknowledge my sinne vnto thee and mine vnrighteousnesse haue I not hid 1 The second forme of Repentance 2 The cause of GODS seuerity against vs. 3 How we should present our selues to GOD. 4 A Confession 5 Betweene great and infinite there stands no proportion 6 Faith and hope our guides and companions to GOD. 7 Whereto a sinner is like 8 How offensiue sin is to GOD. 9 How we must satisfie 10 How we commonly
extenuate our sinnes 11 How we excuse them 12 Temptations cannot excuse vs and wherefore 13 To whom we are obliged to confesse 14 The conscience of man is GODS Kingdome and Consistorie 15 We should not be ashamed that men take knowledge that we haue sinned 16 Pleasures of the body what they are like 17 Our confession must be entire 18 Our lightest sinnes must be confessed 19 Our sweetest sinnes must be confessed 20 One sinne sufficient to vndoe vs. THen I aduanced my selfe to the second forme of repentance From contrition I proceeded to acknowledgement and confession of my sinnes Because I saw it was a childish weakenesse rather to perish by the disease then to empty the stomacke of dangerous humours to suffer sores rather to putrefie and spread then to endure the cleansing and curing of them rather to endure a perpetuall toothach then to haue the tooth pulled foorth And seeing it was for this cause that GOD was so seuere against mee namely for that I would not acknowledge my sinnes seeing by no other meanes I could wrestle out of those difficulties wherinto his displeasure had cast me I forthwith resolued to turn to my GOD and to turne forth my heart vnto him to powre out all the putrefaction of my soule before his pure eyes to open my Conscience and giue a vent to those filthy fumes which had almost stifeled my soule which were more loathsome more infectious then is the damp of dead putrified bodies In a word to say with holy Iob If I haue hid my sinne as Adam concealing my iniquity within my bosome So I presented my selfe before his diuine Maiesty with the same countenance wherewith a poore distressed patient full of impostumes Fistulaes and vgly vlcers presenteth himselfe to an expert Chyrurgian And being prepared to endure both the paine of the corosiue and point of the lance I thus addressed my speech vnto him O LORD my GOD most rich most liberall most mercifull GOD who sitting aboue the Seraphims with thy eyes farre brighter then the Sun piercest all depthes and discouerest all things naked and open to thy view Thou O LORD who art so powerfull and yet so pitifull to that which thou hast made that thou hearest and regardest miserable sinners Graciously behold be fauourably attentiue to me I beseech thee Behold mee thy miserable creature not in anger not in iustice but in compassion and mercy not as a seuere Iudge but as a skilfull and carefull Physician not to punish my infirmities but graciously to cure them O mercifull GOD no lesse infinite in Mercy then in Maiestie In goodnesse and in greatnesse vnmeasurable alike Behold my exceeding great miseries my exceeding great but not infinite miseries not such as can beare any proportion against thy mercies For betweene great and infinite there standeth no proportion O infinite goodnes mercie I am in a most miserable estate yet how to better it caÌ„not tel My doubtfull and perplexed thoughts doe wildely wander in a maze of amazement And this is nothing else in effect but to beat out with what torments I am likest to perish Alas O my GOD wilt not thou relieue mee in these extremities wilt not thou release me O infinite goodnes With al humilitie I entreate thy ayd not vpon any coÌ„fidence in my selfe but faith hope two twins of thy brest who neuer yet haue either let fall or bin denied any suit haue guided mee hither and set me before thee Loe they remaine still present with mee They encourage me they assure me that the more miserable we feele our selues to be the more fit we are to receiue thy mercies and the more standeth it with thy iustice to afford vs the same O thou who art both liberall and rich relieue my pouertie O most mercifull and powerfull LORD release my miseries Heare my distressed soule full of wretchednesse but fuller of guiltinesse groaning at thy gate of mercie See how fowlie it is defiled with euill how deepely corruption hath tainted the verie substance thereof how the stamps of sinne by reason of long custome are so firmely imprinted therein as it is a hard matter to deface them I am like an vncleane beast that hath long wallowed in the proper dung whereby both the beautie hath beene defiled and a loathsome taste is fixed in the flesh Alasse I am plunged in sinne as in a sea wherein I neither see banke nor feele bottome wherin my vaine soule at the same time both floateth with the leuity and is drawne downe with the leaden weights of sin O GOD of my saluation my impure soule hath hitherto beene much troubled much endangered and almost stifeled by enclosing her corruptions and not giuing a free passage for them to breake foorth But now I confesse my sinnes I confesse how grieuously I haue offended thy maiestie I haue broken all thy commandements as if they had beene cobwebs and my verie best thoughts haue beene poysoned with taste of things sensuall The poysonous breath of my thoughts euaporated from my sensuall soule hath beene more offensiue and noysome to thee then the dampes that arise from bodies halfe putrefied in their graues Of all thy debtors I confesse that my accompts are greatest that thou hast most to reckon with mee but giue mee respite for repentance and I will satisfie if not thy iustice by payment yet thy mercie by acknowledgement Haue patience a while and by confession I will pay thee all LORD I will not hide my offences for then wilt thou display them I will lay them open that thou maiest hide them I will acknowledge them that thou maiest take no knowledge of them I will not conceale my miserable defects and defections from thee lest thereby I loose first thy pitie and then thy reliefe I will neuer goe about either to abuse or to auoid thee by denying or â—uppressing my sinnes I will no waies extenuate no waies excuse them I will not extenuate them either by fauourable comparing them with the sinnes of other men or by vnderualuing them in their owne nature I will not excuse them by casting the blame vpon any other vpon the malice and power of the Diuell vpon the witchcraft of the world vpon the soft flatteries of the flesh These are the vaine veyles which our first parents vsed The woman gaue it me the serpent deceiued mee But they cannot suffice to shadow our sinnes For they are not able to compell the will they can no wayes enforce the soule Allure it they may but enforce it they caÌ„not they may knock at our gates but they caÌ„not breake in vnles we open to entertaine theÌ„ And therefore I will neuer endeauour to excuse that which my owne conscience conuinceth I will sincerely acknowledge my sinnes I will take the whole blame vpon my selfe I will not transferre any part thereof to any other For my conscience is so torne with the bitings of sinne my soule is so stretched vpon the racke of sorrow that I am