a Lecture and turne them confusedly out of theyr houshold catalogue so good and right a course doe they carry in these causes And I doe not doubt but if those Philosophers or Oeconomikes of times past were at this daie present to see how these huswiues gouerne and content each one themselues would auouch that they might learne of them new precepts instructions that better would become their faire bookes and volumes May it please ye that I shew ye how these expert fellowes in letters euen as by another Cyrces are transformed and depriued of the greater part of their naturall power Finde me out a yong man lustie and brauely disposed of person affable endued and garnished with all such things as are best beseeming his age let him follow the studie of letters ye shall find him in short time vnlusty louttish vnapt to al things and as little while for conference can he tarry from his booke as can the fish out of the water I pray ye note the lookes of poore Students how sad they are melancholy grim dreadfull languishing humorous and heauie in breefe the very neerest portrait to a deadly counterfeit or a long dried anatomie And as for their complexions they are the hardest in choise that can bee amongst men euer they are suspitious of some euill so bad they are thēselues proud presumptuous despising all honest companies mortall enimies to the so noble sweete sexe feminine vaunters to the vttermost and frantique inuenters of tales trifles inuentions Which Saint Paule diuinely foreseeing admonished vs not to be wise but soberly minded fearing least by ouer-plunging our selues in the depth of humane doctrines we should fall into farre greater perils dangers therefore he counsels vs not to seeke after high and difficult matters but to abide in feare without passing the bounds of obedience Likewise did not he shew himselfe to haue lefte and despised all litterature and worldly knowledge after hee had gotten the true knowledge of GOD when he said nothing was more to be desired then well to know his maister crucified That he was not come to preach garnished with humane wisdome or rhethoricall cunning And that the wisdome of this world was nothing else but follie before God And that it did nothing else but puffe vppe the heartes of men And that whosoeuer sought after things ouer high should finde themselues shut quite out of glorie And these words agree with the saying of Ecclesiasticus that wee should seeke after nothing which surmounteth the capacity of our spirit To proue the same hath not God menaced by the mouth of his Prophet to destroy the wisedome of the wise and to reproue the prudence of the skilfull What shall let me from beleeuing that the wisedome of this world was the inuention of the enimy whom our elders called Daemon seeing the word Daemon signifieth wise and learned This was hee that promised to poore Adam so easie to be deceiued the knowledge of good and euill if he woulde but taste of the fruit which God had forbidden him Plato rehearseth to this purpose that an euill spirit named Theudas was the first inuenter of Sciences hence it followeth as I thinke that we see so fewe learned men but some of them are wicked seditious enuying the glory one of another lurking deceiuers and cruell reuengers which though it be not doone by armes in field like men yet haue they the meanes of performing the same in Comedies beastly Satyres too sharpe and biting verses cruell Iambicks furious Epigrames I woulde willinglie demaund of such as make doubt of the disprofit and slender value of letters if they were of such price and esteeme as they make them to be our great Lords who are as euery one perceiueth very curious of the most faire and pretious things in the worlde woulde they endure such dearth in their houses Why doth not learning make them so rich magnificent as other temporal goods doe And were it so greatly profitable for youth as also such an honest recreation for age I am ashamed to see that in our great Citties and Townes the professors thereof goe from house to house like such as begge bread with empty wallets For in truth this is the end of letters followers and fauourers in these vnhappy and accursed times not onely to bee beggers but beyond al other to be most miserable and male-content That this is true doe but note the very first figure character or letter which wee teache our children in their infancie is it not the Crosse beginning with all pouertie going on with anguishe trouble and greefe and ending with like dolorous death For example see what was the ende of Socrates Anaxagoras who by sentence and decree of the Senate of their countreys were both miserablie poisoned Thales likewise who died with thirst Zeno who was slaine by commandement of the Tyrant Phalaris Anaxarchus who was detestably murdered by the commandement of Nicocreon The great Philosopher and most singular Mathematician Archimides who was slaine by the souldiers of Marcellus And Pythagoras likewise whoe was slaine in companie of three score of his Schollers Thinke on the glorious recompence made to the Philosopher Plato when after his long trauaile for the cause publike he was in the end sold as a slaue by Dionisius the Tyrant Anacharsis died suddenlie Diodorus died in despight because he coulde not resolue a question which was proposed to him by the Philosopher Stilpo Aristotle when he saw himselfe out of credit with Alexander he drowned himselfe in Chalcide in the riuer Eurypus and Calisthenes his scholler was cast forth of the windowes Cicero had his hed and handes cut off and his toong pulled out hauing beene before banished from Rome where he sawe his house ruined his so deerly beloued daughter ded before his face and his wife in the armes of his vtter aduersary Seneca died a violent and outragious death Auerroes the great commenter of Aristotle was broken with a wheele that passed ouer his bodie Iohannes Scotus making his Lecture in England was stabbed to death by his schollers with their penkniues But leauing these auncient matters and to speake of them of our time let vs consider the death of Hermolaus Barbarus who was banished from the Signorie of Venice because without the consent of them he had accepted the Patriarches authority of Aquilea he died by a cole that tooke holde vnder one of his toes Domitius Calderinus died also of the plague The learned counceller or peace-maker was burned after he was dead because they coulde not catch him in his life time Angelus Politianus ended his daies beating his head against the walles Sauanarola was burned at Florence by the commandment of Pope Alexander Peter Lion of Spoleta was throwne into a well Iohannes Tissierus died in an hospitall Erasmus in exile The French Poet in like manner by the miserable and implacable sute of the court euen in his oldest yeares The Lord Iohn Fraunces Pica Mirandula
minding such matters For the poore sicke man considering that he is weake and diseased will preserue himselfe very dilligentlie from al manner of excesse and liue more soberly then can the stiffest and strongest composed bodies These kind of men are such to whom oftentimes it happeneth thorow the ouer-much fiercenesse of their good disposition and strength that boldlie or carelesly they oppose themselues againste a thousand greefes perils and daungers vsing meates prohibited for the health of man taking the corrupted ayre in the euening or else without any need will wander into tempests raine snow winde stormes and thus aduenture themselues from morning to night And the worse is their successe thorowe the confidence which they repose in their bodies which they feeling to be strong and lustie feare not without any discretion to fight heere with one there to smite an other spoile outrage and commit a thousand euils Then what recompence haue they for al these They fall into the rightfull hande of Iustice who without any regard of valour strength dexteritie parents or riches makes them miserablie and shamefully to finish their daies before their expected time It is then great folly to desire strength and health of body so earnestlie seeing it is the cause of so many mishaps were it not onely but in regarde of the warres which we should neuer beholde so cruell or fierce but by the confidence that men suppose to be in their health and bodily strength wherewith great and wise Lordes vse to iest at each other and make as small account thereof as of balles running along the pent-house of a Tennis court For Teares Declamation 11. That it is better to weepe often then to laugh at any time NOt without great occasion is it that I must assuredlie by good right confesse the mourner to bee in better estate then the laugher seeing Salomon in his most holy Prouerbes hath lefte vs in writing that it is better to sleepe and repose in the house of sorrowe then in that of ioy and pleasure By laughter many soules haue beene seuered from their bodies to the infinite greefe of their good friends but by sadnesse not one only which I euer heard of at any time departed but well pleased Laughter hath euermore beene perticularlie proper to fooles mouthes or people without sence And it is not read in any one place of the holye Scripture that our blessed Sauiour euer laughed at any time but that he wept and sorrowed is to be found in sundry passages of the good and faithfull Euangelistes For this cause hath he promised eternall felicity to such as mourne and them that laugh he hath menaced with death To weepe is a signe of penitence and compunction whereto we are often inuited and exhorted by the voices of the holy Prophets but laughter hath beene the cause of mocking it selfe as the euident signe of ouermuch boldnes If we would make regard of the commodities ensuyng by teares howe many disdaines and howe many rages haue beene qualified by one little teare of the eie How manie poore louers haue they vnited and confirmed together that before liued not but in langour distresse How many storming hearts fierce and cruell one against another haue they brideled softened made gentle How many great and honest recompences haue beene obtained and measured by the waight of teares I am of this opinion that all the force and puissance of men assembled together cannot so soon winne or compasse what it would haue as one only teare can yea oftentimes it hath conqueringly obtained grace euen from obstinate and moste pittilesse persons For proofe heereof Heraclitus was alwaies more esteemed for his weeping then euer was Democritus for his laughing See how many thinges worthy of eternall memorie Crassus by this vertue accomplished purchasing the name of a scorner of vanities If we should need to produce the profit of teares often weeping Let vs consider that while our bodies are but young and tender they make them to grow and encrease Wherefore many Nursses in regard heereof are not very hastie to quiet their infantes when they lie criyng in the Cradle but by these meanes suffer them to dilate and stretch forth their members for so they come to the suddener growth And if proofes should faile me against laughter I would content my selfe with this only of good Hyppocrates who hath left written that the diseases which ensue by accident of laughter without any manifest cause are the most difficult to be healed Let vs then set laughing apart seeing it bringeth such offence to man and agreeth not with his honestie and grauitie beside we finde not at this daie among so many lamentable ruines where any place or oportunity for laughing indeed may be graunted or suffered And let vs conclude that laughter wrinkles and makes olde the face counterfeits the person makes the heart ake woundeth the lungs inwards of the bellie so that after long laughing many greefs doe follow whereof we neuer make doubt till wee feele them So that if laughter bee not refrained it makes the pallat of the mouth to fall the throte sore the voice hoarse and oft times shakes the body verie greeuously VVherfore very excellently said the wise man that the end of laughter was greefe and teares which ordinarilie endureth more space of time hath a longer taile behinde it than euer had mourning But the end of continuall teares after this mortall life is ioy and perpetual delectation which neuer hath ending and such as are promised by him who is onely truth it selfe For Dearth Declamation 12. That Scarsitie is better than aboundance ANy man of common sence and opinion will assure yee that for the ease and better estate of his person as also continuance of his pleasures aboundance or earthly goods ought well to be had in request But for one voluptuous man ye shall finde of this opinion I will furnish yee with an hundred of very singular spirit and perfect iudgement that liberally will maintaine the fertillitie and aboundance of goodes in this worlde is the mother and nursse of all euils enemie to all modesty and honestie and cheefe aduersarie to sobrietie The good Lady of Henault bemoned the great Dearth which the turbulence of the warres had caused and among other thinges she wept for the fertillitie of the former yeares past when as she called to minde what store of corne and wines she had and that before a weeke would be past both shee and all hir house shoulde scant tell where to gette foode or drinke once a day But the sober and frugal Solon-nist saith well to the contrarie that the lesse store of victuals are in a contrey the lesse is the insolence of the inhabitāts who in time of aboundance disdain the seruice of their superiors then hath a man greater paine to get a seruant how poore soeuer or bad disposed he be then a man of wisedome well skilde in good letters Moreouer what else
cheekes which seemed before like roses or shining Carbuncles conteyned nothing at all of their former and naturall beawty Like act did many wise well learned Damosels and holy virgines of the Primitiue church of whom especiall memory is made among Christians at this day What say ye of our Courtezans whom God by his especiall grace hauing not giuen the gift to bee the fairest of all other howe daily they cease not to inuent newe and strange manners of paintinges to counterfeit and disguise their age and first naturall shape with false haires Spanish white Pomâ—des Targon distilled waters braied drugs Oyles Powders and others follies too long to be recounted Oftentimes they shaue or burne their artificiall haire and then againe rub slick chafe and washe themselues only to seeme faire yet notwithstanding looke on them at night or in the morning and ye shall finde them more deformed than before but what ensueth soone after vppon this goodly industry Sinne Death and the anger of God Now then desire this feigned faire beawty whoe will and such as best thinke themselues worthy of it for I hold most firmely that it is better to hate flie it then to wish or affect it seeing nothing procedeth thereof but pride ouer-weening and vaine-glorie as also the moste mishapen horned creatures of the world Neuer was I of any other minde since the time I had power of reason to discerne and knowe truth from falshood but that deformed people deserued more praise then the beawtifull nor is it without cause or disagreeing with best sense considering such as are hard fauoured are commonly chast humble ingenious holy and haue euer some sweete appearance of most commendable grace But for them that boast of beautie I leaue to you the consideration of their behauiour which is often times so counterfeit as nothing can be saide to agree lesse with nature You shall see them of lofty countenance inconstant demeanour wandring lookes bold pace and like language nowe iudge at your pleasure what ye conceiue of them Conclude then will I that it is much better to be fowle than faire let no aduersary party intrude himselfe to replie against my speeches for I am both stoutlie determined and sufficientlie furnished to make him answer Had I no more but the testimony of Theophrastus who hath left vs in writing that bodily beawtye is nothing else but secret deceit And he that will not heere with content himselfe to him let me produce the aduise of Theocritus that beawty is an vnknown detriment Shall we then be so vnwise and sottish that euen at the first sight wee will pursue our owne euils and misfortunes more easilie embracing most perillous and damageable beawtie then deformitie ten times more auailing and profitable Would God that foolish minde might not abide in any one but rather that we all would hate what is so vnfit for vs from which commeth no goodnes or felicitie For the ignorant Declamation 3. That ignorance is better than knowledge THe more I thinke heereon the more I resolue and rest in this opinion that it is better to haue no knowledge in letters then to be expert or skilfull therein considering that such as haue consumed the more part of their age in the study of sciences haue in the ende repented themselues thereof and haue oftentimes found very euill successe thereby Valerius the great writing of Cicero who by good right deserued to be called not only the father of eloquence but euen the fountaine of all excellent lerning saith that in his latter years he conceiued such an hatred against letters as if they had beene the cause of his so many greefes and trauailes The Emperour Licinius Valentinianus Heraclides Licianus and Philonides of Malta haue openlie tearmed the skill in letters sometime to be a publique plague sometime a common poison to men And I haue found written in many good Authors that hee which couets knowledge couets vexation that from great experience ensueth oftentimes the greatest daunger Likewise it is certaine that all heresies as well ancient as moderne came from men of knowledge coÌ„trariwise that in people esteemed idiots or men of little knowledge haue beene vsuallye noted expresse signes of vertuous workes and good examples I highly commend the order among the Lucanes that no one professing capacity of letters or esteemed learned may obtaine any office or sit as a Magistrate in their parlement for they stande in feare least these lettered men by their great knowledge which makes them presume so much on their persons should trouble the good order and tranquillity of their common wealth Nor may this be reckoned but to very good purpose if we would well consider their insolencie who vnder shaddow of probation in a colledge would haue euery one stand bounden or be holding to them and thinke vnder colour of their faire allegations with interpretations God wots crooked enough sometime to ouerthrow the best naturall sence in the worlde and they of dutie ought to be aboue all onely heard and listened to Some of them there be that like to Mydas confound in their obstinate opinions and stiffe-necked conceits all things whatsoeuer they take in hand I cannot imagine to what ende are auaileable these men so highly learned who in honor of their followers are called fine polished curious and ingenious wits For if they might serue to gouerne any publique cause how many nations are seene without the knowledge of lawes imperiall or of Stoical or Peripatetical philosophy so to gouerne entertaine themselues that they out-goe al auncient CoÌ„mon weales To thinke that they may serue for the art military I dare boldly witnesse thus much vnto ye that I haue knowne more then one or two Gentlemen and captains wel lettered who by the helpe of their books haue laboured and busied themselues to point out a field leuy an armie put men in arraie and furnishe their squadrons which practise neuer returned them any honor For in truth in matter of warre we daily behold to happen incident nouelties and vnaccustomed stratagems which neuer before were registred or put in vse by the very skilfullest writers in times past Howe can wee then with reason affirme the bookes of Frontinus or Vegetius to be profitable for the art of warre In my conceit the good iudgment of a Captaine ioyned with his long vse and experience in these matters is sufficient enough for him without troubling him to turne ouer bookes of the Art militarie That these lettered people are meet to guide a house or gouerne a houshold which the Philosophers called Oeconomia howe can I agree thereto when at this day is to be noted both heere and elsewhere how many good and honest mothers of families who neuer in their liues studied in any Vniuersitie yet both haue and doe well order their houses guide their houshold yea aboue one or two hundred women for example whoe no displeasure to Aristotle or Xenophon may learnedly reade them
See if olde Tobias after he became blind did feare or loue God euer a iot the lesse then he did before It was my chance one day to reason and conferre priuately with certaine of mine acquaintance that were blind and I remember that one among the rest who sometime had beene a dealer in merchandise sware and auouched faithfully vnto mee that his blindnesse did no waie grieue or offend him but hee the more highly thanked God therefore Because quoth he my sight being taken away I haue likewise lost the offence of spirit whereinto I was drawn in diuers places I frequented And he iustified that since this good fortune befell him he trauailed about his affaires into Spaine where he found himself highly contented that he could not see the great vaunting Spaniard nor so manye Gentlemen by the dozens that for fiue shillings of yeerely rent cause themselues to be entituled my Lord such a one or must bee named Knights at the least Another tolde me that he caused himselfe to bee led into Germanie about certaine businesse hee had with the Foulcres but neuer did he esteeme himselfe so happy as that he could not behold the manifolde discords among the Lords of the Countrey so many deuisions so many garrisons of Spaniards with so many new imperiall cuts A third man told me that he had beene in France about traffique of merchandise where he not a little reioysed that he could not behold the infinite pleaders a Hydra of suites and quarrels the number-lesse throng of catchers and purloiners of benefices a world of false accusers and masqued people chaunging as often in opinions as they doe in habites and attyre Then breaking forth into a great laughter if quoth he I should heereafter passe into diuers places of Italie where I haue accustomablie haunted heeretofore first of all I shall no more see in Romania and Lombardy so many partialities of Guelfs Gibelines so many faire buildings ruined so many bewtifull and goodly Citties destroied by factions I shal no more see the grosse feeding Millanois the auaritious Pauoyan the mutinous Playsencian the fantasticall Parmesan the gracelesse Cremonian the slothful Mantuan nor the proud Ferraran I shall see no more the prating Florentine the dissembling Bolognian the glorious Lucane the vsuring Geneway nor the boasting Modenan And continuing his speech he said to mee beside that he imagined himselfe most happy that the yeer past hee had not beene at Rome no more to note the excessiue pompe of infinite curtezans who clad and decked in the habilements of Queenes triumph on the patrimony of the poore fisher Likewise no more to behold in Naples the troopes of Moores the bands of Ruffians bawds and brothels the great number of knights of the broch who al day doe nothing else but walke with their noses vppe in the wind like Plouers as well in the fieldes as the Cittye with white wands in their hands so expecting their Fortune to the great detriment of their followers Nor likewise to see in Sicilie those great managers of iron-wheeld Chariots who at the least word offered them will counterfeit the countenance of another chollericke God Mars as if they would fight with the sea the fishes Nor also to see so many fine dames ready to be bought for a little to passe the time awaye with Gentlemen In briefe this good blinde man told me so much and so sweetly lulled me asleep with his words as he well-neere made me of the minde to plucke foorth mine owne eies for the greefe I haue to beholde in Venice such a crowde of nice darlings in Padua such indiscreet lookes in Vincenza such beast-like demeanour in Treuiso such disordered libertie at Verona such frantike fury at Brescia such miserable auarice at Bergamo such scrupulous countenances with sundry such like qualities in other places Of force then must they that are cleere sighted behold such things as would enforce stones to starte out of the walles by the great despight and greefe they bring to men In witnesse of the holye man who being newly become blinde by chance happened to meet on the way with Arrius the father of heretiques and hearing among other talke that Arrius greeued for the accident befalne the good man the blinde father thus answered That it was needelesse for him to greeue so much because quoth hee for this blindnesse I highly thanke my God were it not in any other respect but only that I may not see thee that arte such a wicked enimie to God Saide not good Iob that hee had made this couenant with his eyes that they should content themselues with looking vppon one onely woman and not to gaze after any other Hence it is that the Prophet complained so much that his eies robbed frō beasts saying death entered into his heart by the windowes of the body which are the eies seruing to ouerthrow mans vnderstanding whereto suddenly they represent and deliuer without finding any hidden ambush all that they see and perceiue abroad And when they looke to vanity listen what the gentle Poet saith So soone as I had seene I was lost How happened it to the holy Psalmist when by the very seeing of Berseba he was so ouercome with burning and lasciuious regarding her as he wanted not much of incurring the daunger of death The Euangelist exhorteth vs to plucke forth our eyes if they doe scandalize of offend vs and when is it that they doe not both these to vs If I would seeke further for the benefites of the blinde I should finde an infinite number First they haue no need of spectacles wherewith to see small thinges nor of eye glasses otherwise called Bernacles when they trauell in windie weather In Winter they need not feare that the ouer-much whitenes of the snow will hurt or offende their sight They are free from subiection to eie medicines which they haue need to practise that are subiect to the eyes inflamation to the dilating or inlarging the apple of the eie to helpe the disease called Scotomie or when all things in view seeme to be rounde for illusions the eye-gellie the web pearle teares fistula rheume bleared eies and other such like diseases They haue no need to distill the waters of Fennell Sage Veruaine or Eye-bright They need no Aloes infused in wine or prepared Tuthie the whites of egges beaten in rose water nor pilles for the sight Wherfore I conclude that it is better to be blind then to see neuer so well because the blind sees nothing that afflicts or torments them where contrariwise the best sighted haue ten thousand obiects that molest and offendes them without pardon which doth purchase to them so many anguishes brings them into such dangerous extreames as they cannot well tell how to recouer themselues againe How much thinke ye will it displease a poore pilgrime when he shall see in trauailing on his iourney a great many hideous horrible serpents creeping vipers and such like beastes when he shall
to affirme that this worlde is a very Cage or mine of such people And if all they which holde of that race would suffer themselues to be written in the rowle or paper belonging to the Prince of fooles or bee registred in the Abbey of these happy people there should not neede so much strife and lawe for calling one another sot or foole For in sooth it is a name that may beseeme the very greatest and wisest in the worlde yea were it to the great king Salomon who albeit he only among the Hebrewes bare the title of wise yet beside that hee well deserued the name of a foole when he sacrifised to Idols and entertained so long such a great number of Concubines Also of this name were capable the seuen Sages whom ambitious and lying Greece vaunted to bring forth and nourish their actions and behauior Cicero affirmeth that whosoeuer will lightly runne ouer and cull them out shall finde them to be more full of follie then wit How many haue beene seene since the Creation of the worlde that haue escaped infinite daungers only by counterfeiting folly What might they more haue doone if they had beene fooles indeed when the onlye shaddowe was to them the cause of such good How many haue we knowne and heard of that haue beene absolued of theftes murders and other misdeeds by supposition that they indeed were fooles Thinke yee that heauen dooth customablye giue so faire and excellent priuiledges to others as to people diuine and celestiall The farther I wade in contemplation of follie the more pleasing I finde it and garnished with all faire commodities See howe a foole troubles him selfe with a kingdomes affaires or fortifiyng of a Cittye See what paine he puts himselfe to in gouerning an housholde or pertaking with one Prince or other yet notwithstanding we see such as are esteemed the wisest to iniury themselues heereby and wexe very olde with such molestations of the minde May it please ye to vnderstand the difference which I finde betweene the foole and wise man Regard the passions and affections in them both First of all the foole is not any thing curious in his meate or drinke neyther cares for fine decking and clothing himselfe they whom we call wise neuer haue enough and neuer are satisfied with the goods of this world neither can all humane industry or the very goddesse aboūdance with hir great Cornet suffice their insatiable desires Now iudge hereby which of these two come neerest the obseruation of Gods commandement who forbiddeth vs in his Gospell not to be carefull for our food or raiment Beside the foole makes no esteeme of honours and worldly dignities he contemns great preheminences refusing the places and seates honourable in magnificent companies Contrariwise they that holde themselues so wise seeke nothing at this day but worldly honour And to attaine superiour dignities they feare not to endure heat or cold they forget the discommoditie of great trauaile as also losse of rest by day and night to the hazard oftentimes of their liues so deerely beloued and by them held in such pretious account The foole feeles not himselfe prouoked with so many pricks of Fortune he meddles not with sights or combats he hath no Lawe-pleadings nor quarrels wherby to get or defend his goods he hath not such paine in attending on the Court as others haue to be entertained by one or other he yeelds not him self for the miserable requital of two or thre crowns a buckler to ten thousand bullets of shot musquets or harguebuzes he breaks not his neck in riding post after offices benefices or confiscations he languishes not in pursuing the loue or fauour of Ladies hee paies no taxe or tribute lastly he is not subiect to any one but liueth in perfect franchise and liberty He is permitted and licensed to speake what himselfe thinks good touching the dealings of Princes priuate persons without encurring thereby any danger of imprisonment or corporall punishment He hath no need of Rhethoricall cunning to make him selfe attentiuely listened vnto but bestowes on each one the ioyous pastimes of his meriments I stand in need of a whole sourse of eloquence wherewith I might thorowlie paint foorth and discipher the honest vertues of most pretious follie the contrary whereof hath beene cause of the punishing of an hundred thousand iniuries and of ouerthrowing the intelligence and actions of many great personages I find that Fortune hath euermore beene very carefull in bestowing perticular aide vpon fooles and defended them as her most deere children frō infinite perils and dangers Likewise wee see by experience that the greater part of fooles liue longer and more happily then the wise doe Wherefore should we thinke this to be so but because they giue not themselues to any melancholie neuer meddle with lawe-Lawe-causes debates or quarrels neither mollest themselues with matters publique or priuate which makes me say and affirm vnto ye that folly euen as Poesie is somewhat celestiall and filleth the hartes of her children with a certaine spirite of prophesie and diuine furie by meanes wherof they seeme agreeable to euery one and purchase very great esteeme and fauour in the eies of Princes You shall finde by experience that many great wealthy Lords turne their faces from company and conference with wise men yea such as are saide to haue the greatest learning that they may intertaine pleasure with a foole and commune familiarlie with him yea sometimes they will leaue their best and most auncient seruantes or fauorites to delight and bestow countenance on the first foole that comes before them Is it not maruellous that we shall neuer see a man of great knowledge indeede but hath some part of this pretious folly in him Though ye woulde produce neuer so many learned men or of what profession else so euerye please be they Philosophers Orators Painters Statuaries Musitians Builders yet they haue some tast heereof and generally all people of learning whatsoeuer Where shall yee finde one singular Poet at this day that doth not participate in this folly Euery one knoweth that the Poet deepest skild therein is accounted most excellent And if the greate Philosopher Plato had not had more then a reasonable portion of this diuine folly thinke yee that he had deliuered so many faire excellent matters which we haue at this day after his maner And yet you are ashamed to be accounted or called fools The inuenter of the Italian Cardes whereat they haue a play or pastime called Tarault did in my cōceit very ingeniouslie when he put the Deniers or monyes and Bastons or clubs in combate togither as the very encountring of force and iustice But yet he deserued more praise for giuing in this play the most honourable place to the foole as we do to the Ace which we should rather call Nars that in dutch signifieth a Foole. This deuiser well noted the great seruitude whereto they most commonly are subiect that couet a place
among the very wisest for it behoues them to haue so many discretions so manye respects so many considerations wherwith the happie foole neuer troubleth himselfe so that they are constrained oftentimes to submit themselues and continue like countenance and daily against theyr natures to seeme graue and seuere The Foole doth not repose any confidence in his owne wisedome neither hath recourse to the subtletie and deceits of this world He neuer rests himselfe on the support and fauour of other whereby anye harme may happen to him for God hath him in his custodie and safegarde Which is a worde whereat our Catoes at this day will easily enter into choller But they must lightly passe it ouer and by constraint of verity confesse it true if they will giue but neuer so little regarde to the holy Scriptures there they shall finde that the wisedome of this world hath byn more sharpely taxed and with more greeuous arrests condemned then folly And yet our bold ouer-weeners will goe contrary to this diuine word to take part with that which God the Creator not onelye hath reproued among men but likewise greatly hateth I finde that the very greatest and most renowmed Nations in Europe haue long while since gotten some title or marke of folly To beginne with the Gaules did not Saint Paule call them foolish Gallathians Albeit the prowesse and strength which they haue daily shewen in deedes of Armes may sufficientlie testifie from East to West yea euen to the Antipodes at the ende and limits of which regions hath their Ensignes beene most brauely displaied The Portugals by their haughtie enterprise who notwithstanding haue beene reputed foolish passed so farre as the Indiaes where with losse and damage of their men they conquered many places in those Countryes and got by these meanes the commoditie to traffique with many places before not inhabited This is it which makes them so proud in the trade of merchandise and brag of the excellencie of their Lishbone enritched with so faire a port of the sea also two so wel proportioned mountaines at the entrāce and the floud with golden sandes As for the Germaines it is well knowne that they haue a large share heerein especially they who in imitation of women or children so often change into many opinions and maisters seruices For this it may be saide that Caesar in his Commentaries did them not so much honour as to call them valiant champions or prudent in affaires of warre If we will passe so farre as into Italie we shall finde many goodly and noble Citties among the rest that serue as great or very faire Cages to fooles of all fashions and that they are in fauour of such an esteemed matter the most honourably scituated in al the Countrey and by the great number of fooles contained in them they are diuinely embellished and inritched with the very cheefest excellencies and noble priuileges that can be desired That this is true let vs consider the excellent scituation of auncient Sienna for the honest libertie wherof the King not many daies past so earnestlie trauailed You shall there beholde as a matter of antiquity to preserue fooles in health erected a pleasant beautiful building enuironed with the most sweet and gratious aire in the world garnished with rich and honourable lodgings villages neere hand of great receit naturall Bathes very pure and healthfull Moreouer as with men so is it well furnished adorned with Ladies gentle and courteous young people so well disposed as may be good musitians and Rhetoricians as any cittie else thereabout except the ancient Vniuersitie adioyning and the newe Academie of the Intronati who by the meanes of their so highlie fauoured folly do in time of peace thinges of incomparable pleasure and recreation What shall I say to ye of Parma where to maintaine fooles in pastimes is a very faire plaine of grasse rounded neighboured with many pleasant mountaines How fertile is it likewise of noble and puissant families and couragious souldiours whoe by vertue of their singular follye beeing assisted with the aide and succour of the French are redoubted and feared of all their neighbour countries I will hold my peace of the Parmesane cheese whereof notwithstanding that I haue tasted yet I cannot forbeare but say in my hart that if for that meate our Father Adam had transgressed in my conceit hee had beene somewhat excuseable nor should I after taste thereof haue any desire to the Nectar and Ambrosia of great Iupiter O how they of Verona Brescia and Venice were beholding to worthy folly when they made answere to K. Lewes the twelfth that they were wise inough whereby they constrained him to send them so many French-men as were accounted fooles because their wisedome and magnificence knew not how to resist th' others forse prowesse So were the fools of the saide king Regentes and maisters ouer the wise Venetians as before they had been ouer the Genewaies Millaineses as long time before that the fools that were led by the great Frenche Captaine were maisters ouer the mighty and wise Romaines Too long woulde the rehearsall be of fooles and Arch fooles that are to be found enclosed within the Citties of Italie Wherefore to finishe this discourse I will thus frame my conclusion that fooles ought to be singularlie esteemed and commended bicause God doth them so much fauour as hee hath chosen by them to confound and ouerthrow the wisdome of this world withall that the most noble Citties puissant Nations ought to be esteemed much more for folly then wisedome For him that hath lost his worldly Honours and Preferments Declamation 6. That a man ought not to be greeued though he be despoiled of his goods and honours I Am not a little abashed for what cause the noble men of our time make so much adoo and mooue such quarrell and contention for the losse of their fraile and slippery estats seeing it followeth vpon necessitie that one day they must needes be dispossessed and taken from them if not by force yet by the meanes of death who of his owne nature imposeth an ende on all things And I see no cause or reason why they being subiect to so many humaine passions and fortunes as euen the very poorest basest condition in the world shoulde presume and hazard themselues before so manye persons of greater valour perhaps then themselues for aduancement and superiority and yet they take scorn to be made of like mettall as they are to whom by right of nature they are altogither equall semblable An excellent Philosopher and of very great reputation in his time maintained that the rich hadde euer some occasion to contend with their riches and temporall goods as also beautifull persons with their bodilie graces But the greatest and most excellent contention that men ought indeed to haue among themselues were to striue who should surmount ech other in gentlenesse and honestie and the very highest preheminence that should bee
thinke we may be the plentie of one or two yeeares when wee giue our selues to so great feasting but euen an earnest of the dearth in them that may or will followe soone after The interpretatiō that iust Ioseph made of Pharaohs dream may serue for witnesse heereof What is it that better giues knowledge of the price of any thing bee it neuer so excellent then the Dearth or scarsity therof In the East Countreys among the Sauages no more esteeme is made of golde or pretious stones then we in these partes doo make of yron lead or brasse In Madera Cyprus and other Islandes where the Sugars doe grow they giue them to their Swine to eate as we in the Countreyes neerer hande giue them great aboundance of fruites And wherefore doe they thus Euen because exceeding plenty maketh the contempt of most excellent things For experience when times fall out according to our owne wish how many is there among vs that remembers God therby and giues him thanks with a good hart but onely in a manner by waye of countenance But when times come that wee like not of then is it that we turne vnto him and cry him mercie then confesse we only his diuine incomparable bountie greatnesse and excellence Infalliblie the value of bread and wine which are things needfull for nourishing the body and to preserue the soule therein is neuer knowne in the time of aboundance when we make spoile thereof cast it at our feete and giue it to feede filthie beastes Nor may I forget howe in some Countreyes stored with Vineyardes when one plentifull yeere comes among other they will bee so insolent as to make waste thereof at euery street corner But when they haue little store of wine and graine then they taste sauour so well and vse them in so small quantities as nothing at all is lost We thinke on God praise him and giue him thankes but then we doe it best when we giue our selues to know his great vertues Then our bodies are most healthfull and actiue because our wine is well tempered and we eate our wheate so pure as they both togither may ingender the opilations of faith and not of other matters And as for the viuacitie of the spirit I say that euen as in the time of fast or diet the spirits work best and greatest causes so in the time of searsitie they engender not such huge numbers of smokes as hinder them from dooing their diuine operations For this especiallie among other causes at first were the fastes and Lent time instituted in good season and time of flowing plentie after wine good corne a thousand disagreements a thousand batteries a thousand lawe-strifes and contentions When a poore labouring man had his halfe-peny towards a pinte of wine then could hee make mery with his fellowes so long as to driue away yrkesome wearinesse Then were none so simple but sate at the table with the house-mayster and fed as at a franke marriage feast and when the belly was full then to dauncing Let vs now make some little discourse of Countryes fertile and abounding in all goods comparing them with such as are barren and vnfruitfull and let vs see if their inhabitants are better natured or disposed then they that dwell in the desarts or regions neuer tilled and not fertile First of all in Hircania if it be true which that most faithfull Greeke hath written in his historie one only stocke of a Vine yeeldeth about a Tunne of wine and euery foote of a figge tree filleth wel neer forty frailes with that fruit The wheat although it naturallie fall to the ground from the eare on the stalke yet without any industry or humane labour it increaseth euery yeare in mightie aboundance The Bees doe naturallie work their honny on the trees from whence euen as Manna from Heauen it droppeth continually down on the earth and there are none will take the paines to gather it All this notwithstanding the people of that countrey are accounted the most cruell fierce and wickedst Nation in all the world In the Indian Countryes the Earth beareth twise a yeere and they haue two seasons for gathering their fruites neuerthelesse if yee knew the people of the Countrey ye shall finde them fantasticall lyers and deceiuers to the vttermost In Babilon euery little corne of wheat bringeth foorth two hundreth other for it beside this the millet and other bread graine thorow the strange and wonderfull nature of the soile stretcheth vppe in such height as do the trees Yet notwithstanding all these thinges the inhabitants of the Countrey are more abounding in vile life and villanies then all other nations are beside In Tacapa a great Citty of Africa is to be founde such store and aboundance of whatsoeuer can bee desired for the nourishment and life of man al things at so small a rate or price as they scantlye make any reckoning thereof in like manner is there to bee found the verie plentifullest store that can be named of theeues adulterers treasons and infidelities Now let vs conferre heerewith the other part the barren regions or lesse fertile in goods and let vs see if they be not altogither industrious freends to vertue and greatly hardened for paines and bodily labours In the firste place lette vs consider what the Countrey of Denmarke is and what the Franconians and Danes haue beene that thence issued Let vs remember withall the Scythians that liue at this day in trauaile without any certaine habitation now in one place then in another What and how many braue warriours haue come from this people Euen as in our times we haue seene issued from the Isles of Ireland Swethen and Countries vnfruitfull colde and partlie neighbors to Scotland Yet in these countries is found for nourriture of the inhabitantes nothing more then milke and fish but for softnesse and delicatenesse none else like them But let vs leaue strangers and onely make discouerie of ourselues How many men of wisedome and authoritie thinke ye in time of our memorie hath issued from the vntilled and mountaine countreyes of Sauoye Daulphine Auuergne Gascoigne Limosine and Perigueulx Imagine ye that the Rabulanes Onions and Beanes of these seuerall soiles could in ought diminish their goodnesse of spirit Thinke ye for these they owe ought to our minions of the Court elsewhere who are nourished and brought vppe with all wanton and lickerish thinges How many Chancellors Presidents Councellors Knights captaines and such like haue ye seene and daily doe beholde in honour of these quarters more then any other yet their countries are of such nature as their Coleworts Mullets Turneps and Chesenuts doth there giue them better nourishment then will the moste pretious wheat or graine in the worlde This inferreth and prooueth well vnto yee that without this scant and frugall arsimonie which to them is naturall neuer would they haue beene such as now they are I agree very well with yee that after they haue once
The Defence of Contraries Paradoxes against common opinion debated in forme of declamations in place of publike censure only to exercise yong wittes in difficult matters Wherein is no offence to Gods honour the estate of Princes or priuate mens honest actions but pleasant recreation to beguile the iniquity of time Translated out of French by A. M. one of the Messengers of her Maiesties Chamber Patere aut abstine Imprinted at London by Iohn Windeâ— for Simon Waterson 1593. To the King SIr after you had heard the censures of diuers learned Gentlemen on the seuerall Paradoxes which you pleased to propound and were therein as I imagined fully satisfied yet you would needes make triall of my meane iudgement in such matters and thervpon commanded me to set down mine opinion How simple soeuer they be doone they are and now in all humblenes presented to your Maiestie who doubtlesse will allow them gratious countenance because it was a taske imposed by your selfe and beside requireth labour and good wit to defend such contraries Let no manne thinke then that I or any other would be so sencelesse as to holde directly any of these vaine reasons but what for argumentes sake may be said that set I downe and no otherwise Your Highnesse knowes that the simplest conceit can maintaine It is better to be rich then poore better for a Woman to be faire then foule better for a man to be wise then a foole c. But to defend the contraries to these so farre as modestie and reason wil allow deserueth no hard coniecture among the learned because they are onely but exercise of wit to make proofe of a mans habilitie in such difficult occasions Cornelius Agrippa deserued good report for his Vanitas Scientiarum and I hope to passe the pikes with my Paradox'apologia how euer it fall out so your Maiesty buckler me with wonted fauour I am of Caesars mind Iactaest alea. Your Maiesties most humble subiect and seruaunt R. G. S. D. M. To the friendly Reader GEntle Reader euen as contrarie thinges compared one with another do giue the better euidence of their value and vertue so the truth of any matter whatsoeuer appeareth most cleerely when the different reasons against the same is equalled or neighboured therewith Beside whosoeuer woulde prepare a Knight to the field must first exercise himselfe in the most common and vulgare actes of Armes that cunning stratagems may seeme the lesse laboursome to him In like manner for him that woulde be a good Lawyer after he hath long listened at the barre he must aduenture to defend such a cause as they that are most imployed refuse to maintaine therby to make himselfe more apt and ready against common pleaders in ordinarie causes of processe For this intent I haue vndertaken in this book to debate on certaine matters which our Elders were wont to cal Paradoxes that is to say things contrary to most mens present opinions to the end that by such discourse as is helde in them opposed truth might appeare more cleere and apparant Likewise to exercise thy witte in proofe of such occasions as shall enforce thee to seeke diligentlie and laboriously for sound reasons proofes authorities histories and very darke or hidden memories Notwithstanding in this conceits I would not haue thee so much deceiued as that eyther my sayings or conclusions should make thee credit otherwise then common and sensible iudgement requireth and yet withall remember that diuersitie of things doth more comfort mens spirites then daily and continually to behold whatsoeuer is common and frequent to our iudgements Farewell For Pouertie Declamation 1. That it is better to be poore than Rich. COnsidering for what and against whome I am to speake in your presence I haue great occasion to feare and withal to request that credit and fauour shoulde haue no more meanes to blemish and obscure truth on your partes then may innocencie and simplicitie on my behalfe by bringing and conducting ye into the apparant light For minding to commend such things as are blamed and hated by most part of men it will be almost impossible for me to escape displeasure in the matters themselues which of each one and at all times haue beene loued esteemed and cherished aboued all other things But one thing that heerin giueth me some comfort is that among the wise and vertuous the number whereof are dailye without comparison farre lesse albeit much more esteemed then the bad and ignorant I shall escape vnblamed Wherefore I need not be dismaied if I find few protectors and friends for praising matters so good and honest when my aduersarie findeth greater aduantage for extolling such things as are euill and pernitious Nowe because the principall point of my cause consisteth in letting ye vnderstand the estate and valew of such matters as I stand for I desire ye to wish him who would turne ye from the knowledge heerof as pretending not to know that the well skilde in letters haue for the most part been poore and needie persons To cal to memorie the life of Valerius Publicola Menenius Agrippa as also the good Aristiâ—es who died all so poore as they were faine by almes to be buried Hee may remember likewise Epaminondas king of Thebes in whose rich houses Pallaces after so many faire victories and noble deedes of armes by him perfourmed was found but one poore straw-bed or base mattresse for to put in his Inuentory He may bee mindfull also of Paulus Aemillius Attillius Regulus Quintus Cincinnatus Cato Elius and Marcus Manlius whose noble hartes were more coÌ„manded by want then the height of worldly fortunes And who knowes not that loue of pouertie had such power ouer the good Abdolominus that to be ruled thereby hee refused the most riche and abounding kingdome of Sydonia he being elected by the people of the Countrey to be gouernor thereof Heerein appeareth sufficiently the great number of molestations and trauailes hidden vnder the vaine splendor of riches and the aboundance of honours hidden in the beautiful bosome of pouertie honors well knowne and vnderstood by the Poet Anacreon to whom it happened that hauing been two whole nights togither without any rest troubled with continuall deuisings how he might keepe from theeues and imploy the fiue talents of golde which Polycrates had giuen him at length to deliuer himselfe from this perpetuall molestation and returne to his former happinesse he brought backe the faire Talentes to the Tyrant with such wordes as one of his sorte might very well vse and notwithstanding hee was poore and indigent yet he refused those thinges so highly accounted on It is certaine that hee whoe hath alwaies liued poor in this world hath no greefe or sorrowe when he departeth from it for it is to bee considered that hee leaueth this earthlie life more contented and ioyfullie then he that by the meanes of riches hath therin endured long time of pleasure As for my selfe I neuer saw one that was poore indeed who
wherewith to oppugne and ouerthrowe the chastitie of innocent maidens Yet thinke not that gold serueth only as a custome to persecute the modesty of women withall but assure your selues beside that it is daily the cause of monstrous treasons slaughter and many other deedes of vile excesse which the breuity of time and feare of offending ye will not permit me to rehearse Wherefore I will conclude with the good Phylosopher Possidonius that riches is the cause of infinite euils which contrariwise cannot be so said or alleaged against our holy and well aduised pouertie of whom learned Seneca speaketh honourably sayeng That the naked by this speciall meane is out of danger of theeues and such as are free from money may in besieged places liue at ease not dreading the feare of enimies Much better then without comparison is franke pouertie then such slauish riches seeing from pouerty springeth infinite profits and commodities and from worldly goods proceedeth nothing but vnhappinesse For the hard-fauoured face or fowle Complexion Declamation 2. That it is better to be fowle than faire WHo knoweth not how much the deformitie of body and hard fauoured face is to bee esteemed principally in womē for in men it was neuer in so great request hath neuer considered how many amorous sparks is dayly to be seen vnder an il-fauoured countenance and badde composed body choicely hid and couered which in a faire face finely polished giues often occasion of ceaselesse flames and cruell passions But the strong and inuincible bulwarke which the fowle face not onely of olde but likewise in these times hath erected for it selfe will encounter the fires of loue that are so damageable Do ye beleeue Gentlemen if faire Helen the Greeke and the gentle Troian Sheepheard had beene hard fauored or counterfeit in personage that the Greekes would euer haue taken so much paine in pursuing them Nor had poore Troy endured such cruell ruine and destruction in longe description whereof so many skilfull wits were wearied and tyred And if we shall compare and vnite together the beawty of the mind with that of the body shall we not finde a greater number of deformed people to be more wise and ingenious then the faire and well fourmed Let Socrates be our witnesse whome the historians and auncient figures represent to be so ilfauoured as might be notwithstanding by the Oracle of Apollo he was acknowledged to be the wisest man of his time Phrigian Aesope the most excellent fabulist was in forme of bodie so strange and mishapen as the verie ougliest in his time in comparison of him might rightly bee resembled to Narcissus or Ganimede neuerthelesse as each one may read hee was most rich in vertues and in spirit beyond all other most excellent Of great deformitie were the Philosophers Zeno and Aristotle Empedocles fowlie composed and Galba a very ougly counterfeit neuerthelesse they al were of maruellous and sweet disposed spirit Could any impeach the deformity of Philopoemen who after hee was seene to be a good and hardie souldiour came he not to the dignity of a most valiant captaine and was hee not reuerenced among his people for his high excellent vertues Consider Gentlemen on such as are of faire and corpulent fashion and ye shall commonly finde them to be sicklie more weake and lesse able to trauaile more soft delicate and effeminate then the other kind of people Againe ye shall sildome times see it happen that in a beautifull body being of great excellence chastity agreeth in selfe-same likelihood because it is to bee kept with great difficultie being by so many sought after so earnestlie What shall we say of such whoe not contenting themselues with nature doe daily frame very great complaintes against her making no spare of their goods or labour to reforme with all endeuor what seemeth best to them for fashion of their bodies because they be not appropriate or agreeing with their curious appetites Of such fooles I demaund seeing nature the most carefull and discrete mother of all things hath giuen them what she thought meet and profitable in the form of their bodies for what cause they should be displeased with her or imagine her a bad bestower who would neuer giue them any part of that folly which is so vainely set by and esteemed of by euery one Nature giues not to her friendes the things that may quickly be wasted by sicknesse or ouerthrowne by the course of age therefore true liberalitie is knowne by the firme and long continuance of the gift bestowen vpon any one and what see ye of lesse permanence then beawty Consider how it hath headlong throwne downe yong people into secret greefes and perillous daungers and allured them to such hatefull sins as right happie might he count himselfe that coulde escape them with his honor vnstained Contrariwise note the good and profit ensuing by deformitie when all they in generall that of olde time haue beene yet at this day are studious in chastitie doe openly confesse as nothing hath like force in them to tame and check the pricks of the flesh neither long watchings greeuous disciplines or continuall fastinges as one only looke vpon an il-fauoured and counterfeit person Hence ensueth that which is vsed as a common prouerbe concerning a very fowle deformed woman that shee serueth as a good receipt and soueraigne remedy against fleshly tentations O sacred and pretious deformity deerly loued of chastitie free from all scandalous daungers a firme rampart against all amorous assaults I perceiue that by thy meanes company keeping is the easier to bee allowed for thou takest from them all greefes annoiances chasing from thy societie all wicked suspitions as a very speciall remedy against desperate iealousie O that I coulde finde wordes worthy thy praises and deserts whence proceedeth infinit good and treasure which with great shame hath beene by the ignorant despised and blamed O what affection I haue to perswade my friends how they shoulde know henceforth to adorne and embelish themselues with the beawtie that for euer endureth and not to depart therewith from among vs either drinking eating waking sleeping or breathing I meane that beawtie that keepes vs companye euen to our graue and leaues vs not till the latest gaspe that which we may truely call our owne no way due or attributable to our parents Gaine-say me who shal I will rest my selfe on this opinion that much better is it to be adorned with such a colour then to trust or repose only in borrowed corporall beauty which so easilie corrupteth euen by the least touch of any feuer that may come vpon vs. I remember a yong maiden of Perigourd who perceiuing her beauty to be a very great suspitious and capitall enimie to her good fame and that in regard thereof she was daily required and solicited by many yong yoonkers her owne selfe with a rasour or some piece of siluer made sharpe for the purpose so disfigured her faire face that her two
see vnder him quick-sandes quag-mires downe-fallings and most fearefull deepe places when he shall meete to beard him his most mortall enemie when he shall see himselfe mocked scorned and railed at with all vnseemely gestures both of mouth and hands Poor eies of howe many euils are ye the cause through your owne curiositie How many follies doe ye deliuer to the most milde and simple spirit only to troble the gratious rest thereof What letters written or what wordes engrauen are by yee represented to the poore hart to fill him full of all bitternesse Howe many gests and motions doe yee shew to the natural sense which soone after are the cause that man liueth in no quiet in his conscience How many dissimulations do ye note aswell in the Court as elsewhere vnder a counterfeit smile with a calfe-like made courtesie an Italian reuerence a Iudas-like kisse and embracing and a bare voice offering seruice Do ye not then account them happy that haue beleeued and neuer seene any of these things Vpon these speeches and reasons produced on my behalfe I leaue ye Gētlemen to set downe such iudgement as to you shall seeme best assuring my selfe very confidently that after all considerations ye will not diminish any part of my due right or equity For the Foole. Declamation 5. That it is better to be a foole than wise ALbeit the like matter which I am now to proue and defende hath beene already by two excellent men deliuered in this honourable assemblie and by them deliberated on to their aduantage It may please ye yet not to thinke it strange if in regarde of the occasion which this day offers it selfe I come as now to gleane and gather after them gone before if so be I can finde any thinge by them left or omitted either as vnaduisedlie or else if perhaps they had not prooues sufficient readie at hand to exchange in the cause For the firste aduertisement I will vse the aduise and opinion of the auncient Philosophers which was that to liue securely in this world they thought it best to vse the counterfeit shadowe of a foole and they saide that euen as he who hath some meane to counterfeit well a Prince Lorde or Gentleman can doe no lesse for the whyle but enter into the same trauaile solicitude cares paines and greefes as the person he imitates is subiect vnto so hee that in this world will sometimes cunningly disguise himselfe with the masque of folly as one may perceiue nothing else by him but euen natural foolery cannot in so dooing but participate with the happy partes and conditions of a foole which are of such sort as the very richest and best pleased in this worlde are not in any thing like or to be compared to them Witnesse a braue Gentleman a younger brother who by mishap that his elder brother woulde not impart liuings reasonably with him became a foole during which Fortune he had this imagination that all the ships which daily arriued in the Port of Diepe were his owne By meanes of which perswasion so soone as he vnderstoode of their comming thither he would walke before them a mile and more on the land vsing such kinde and cheerefull gestures to thē as by his words he seemed to thinke and assure himselfe that all the marchandize on boorde in the Hauen appertained to himselfe The like woulde hee doe when any ships departed thence to Sea eyther for Flaunders Spaine Portugall England or any other countrey he would vaile his bonnet to them a farre of recommending them to God wishing them faire winde a good voiage and speedy returne His euill hap at length was such that his brother in this time of folly returning from the warres at Bologna and seeing his brother come thus before him with such new manner of salutations greeuing as I thinke at this his happy state of life hee deliuered him into the handes of the most skilfull Physitians he coulde finde in the countrey by whose industrie the happy foole returned to his former disposition of good sense which made him afterward offended with his brother because he had depriued him of so great recreation of spirit which he confessed he receiued in his pleasing folly whereof he yet hauing some small remembrance affirmeth that neuer before or since that time he liued more ioyfully nor better agreeing with his owne mind In like manner is it not a thing highly to be commended to see a man of meane and base condition among the inferiour and abiect sorte of people by vertue of this braue kind of folly to enter into such an humour as to weene himselfe to be a Pope an Emperour a King a Duke or some great Prince or Lord And withal to feele in his heart the self-same affections and contentment of mind as accustomablie are felt by such as truely are constituted in those high dignities Hereof may beare record the Lackey of a Gentleman of Aniou who by the aide and comfort of his fortunate folly imprinted in his minde the pontifical dignitie for the administration wherof at a certain hower of the day which he had obtained by licence of his maister he would locke himselfe apart into a chamber with his confederates and instructed companions who notwithstanding they mocked him yet tooke great pleasure therein and there after his owne mind would he appoint a Consistorie lyke vnto little children that in their pastimes doe counterfeit the actions of the very greatest personages dispatch Bulles giue benefices create Cardinals send embassades in briefe he would doe al that he imagined beseemed a Pope and when the houre was expired he would returne to his wonted seruice Thinke ye that he which walked thorow Paris notwithstanding he was all dirtie bedagled yet supposing himselfe to be a Cardinall or Legate deserued no esteeme in his owne conceit Hee that named himselfe to be a Prophet He that preached wrote himselfe the father of Caine He that saide he was of the lynage of Zabulon And another who with his Scepter Crowne of gold glistering thought himselfe to be an Emperour Thinke ye not I say that such as these are highly contented in minde more perhaps then if they were such as they ween themselues to be What thinke ye of Villemanoche whoe expected the kings daughter in marriage and would complaine in all companies where hee came what wrong was doone him in that they delaied his marriage so long Deeme yee not such fooles haue as much or rather more pleasure in these imaginations then such as rightlye are placed in those dignities They haue as much by these meanes in that they partake not in the molestations which ofte are found in the high estates of great personages being not trobled with gouerning the traine belonging to theyr huge houses I cannot well conceiue the cause why some are so suddenly waspishe when they are called fooles it may be said that they forget the number hath beene alwaies infinite wherby some haue dared
sought for in this world were to enuie one another who shoulde bee most liberall courteous and affable For this cause Dioclesian was praised esteemed among the wise men of his time when by his modestie he deigned to make refusall of the Romain Empire which then was farre greater and better prouided then euer it had beene before in imitation of whom many other great persons haue since beene moued to doe the like Such an one was the Vnckle to great king Charlemaine who became a Monke at Mont Cassin where hee liued the remainder of his yeares most holy and religiouslie drawing by his example to the like many Barons and great Lordes of the Realme of France Antiochus King of Syria being by the Romaines depriued and deposed from the iurisdiction which he had by the mountaine Taurus came and rendered sollemne thanks therefore to the Senate commending them because heereby he found himselfe well deliuered and disburdened of such a great weightie molestation Heracleus and Galerian in like manner eased discharged themselues from the superioritie rule they had ouer the people gaue their delight altogither to the pleasure of husbandrie And why hath not the like minde continued since then in the harts of our Noble men to this instant What mean our wise men that they disswade not the fansies of great Lordes from this endlesse heate and desire of rule which bringeth nothing else therewith but an ouer-feruent and ambitious will That it is so looke where such couetous and ambitious men beare sway there is slender iustice the rich eate the poore and the Nobles out-rage the Peasants The Inhabitants of the Isle Taprobane hadde in mine opinion a very worthye and commendable custome when they vsed to elect for their Prince and Gouernour such an one among them whom they had knowne and had proofe of a long time to bee a true desirer of the profit of their weale publique and him likewise by right and semblable order they would againe deiect and depose if by any meanes he swerued or changed from his right course I haue heard that they of Dace and Bohemia went very neere this custome but it came to passe that since those times they coulde not make choise of any better I could wish that such as deserue the gouernement of Signiories and common weales shoulde be drawne and compelled thereto as it were perforce and by the same meanes the gate to be barred against couetousnesse greedinesse ambition violence and deceipt But what makes me speake thus Marie because I haue knowne in Italie certaine Lordes gouernors of the people to lead their liues after a very strange course or manner bearing capitall hatred to their poore subiects Lords that haue had no other care but heere and there licentiouslie to reuell and dishonour the very honestest maidens in their iurisdiction drawing them violentlie by meanes of certaine ruffians which they entertaine as hounds onely for this vile purpose forth of the best houses in their townes and Cittyes Poore blinde men destitute of naturall sense is this the manner your elders taught ye whereby to rule and guide your subiects Was it thus that the good Lordes of times past the vertuous Princes as well Ecclesiasticall as secular whom Homer woulde so honourably call pastors of the people were wont to doe This so beast-like and dishonest custome doth it any iote sauour of true Christianity They are no pastors that commit such insolencies they are rauening wolues and destroyers of all humane societie Some are to be found in Italie and else-where to whom is publikely giuen this faire report that they dilligently enquire after their people not to chastise or reforme their vices and bad behauior but contrariwise to enquire secretlie who amongest them hath the best pursse and after knowledge thereof seeke some couerture to make them lose their goods subborning false witnesses against them who without any reason shal enforme false plaints or quarrels against them or else by greeuous iniuries and outrages prouoke them to vndertake Armes where likwise false villaines appointed for the nonce taking some intended cause of offence presently informe or complaine against them and hauing seazed on their bodies afterward by these means their riches comes into the Lordes hand who vnder coulour of iustice causeth them to be condemned by Iudges in greeuous paines and amercements so getting subtillie yet with some colour of excuse their goods by way of confiscation Crueltie well beseeming a Tragedie and which since the creation of the world was neuer the like heard of A Baron of Lombardie one day made this brag as for a great proofe and example of his singular vertue prowesse that not long before he had gotten the spoile of one of his mightiest subiects emptiyng his Garners seazing on his goods perforce proceeding euen to the imprisonment of his body The matter obiected against him by forged witnesses at the Lordes appointment was that he had runne the Hare and flowne the Partridge vpon his land albeit the poore honest Gentleman was more readie to chase a good piece of Beefe then Hares and had neuer run farre of neere after strange beastes or birds Yet notwithstanding this good deed the honest minded Baron which matter most of all displeaseth me would make profession of sanctitie religion and deuotion Lord God that thy patience is thus great nor is it without great reason that thou art called full of patience and longanimitie seeing that so sweetly thou endurest the dealings of these so cruel and insupportable monsters brought forth borne on the earth only to consume and deuoure thy poore people Assure ye that I haue seene in the kingdome of Naples many monsters of this fashion and nature hauing harts like Lions and nailes like Griffons to whome nothing seemed impossible concerning inhumanity and impietie And with these few examples I am constrained to content my selfe without spending time to bring ye other proofes for defence of this present occasion because the greefe I both find and feele in rehearsing these enormities driueth me into ouer great affliction making my hart so weake and feeble as all the residue of my vitall powers want their helping vse Now in truth let vs thus reason a while What is he who will denie that such deedes and behauiour of life is not sufficient to prouoke the anger of God against vs And to cause that those Lordes through long space of time that they haue thus ruled held their places should in a moment be elsewhere transported Thinke ye if the very greatest Lordes aswel spirituall as temporall woulde at this daye doe their endeuour and employ themselues night and day as best beseemes them to well gouerne and admonish their people wee shoulde finde such a number of men to couet and reach after kingdomes and Signiories as now we doe and such as are so mal-contēt to be depriued of their great charges and vexations as now with greefe we may behold It is then in
gaine-said Beleeue mee that will but I holde as a matter doubtlesse that barrennesse is a most singular remedie against the piersing thornes of housholde life which by better meanes then this onely cannot be escaped or preuented And I beleeue for certainety that this would be a souereigne medicine against the priuate mallice of children except by good hap the diuine plant called Hermetiae could be gotten which whosoeuer vseth if Democritus be not a lyar not only shall engender honest children and well disposed but likewise very faire and gratious But I stand in doubt that this hearbe is lost for which of the skilfullest and moste dilligent herballists of our time that euer knewe it Or where is the hande that euer planted or gathered it If nothing can be found in Dioscorides in Crescentius or in Plateairus all good Apothecaries I thinke assuredly that this plant is altogither loste for our time seeing by good proofe we now beholde children so disobedient being lyars Tauerne hunters Gamesters swearers and for conclusion capitall enimies to all vertue Then doubt not but that good Democritus imagined this hearbe or dreamed on some other thing or else that he sawe and knew it after he had put out his owne eies to become therby the better Phylosopher I thus conclude then that a barren woman is much better then a fruitfull and let vs not bee carefull to haue such store of children seeing they haue doone harme to so manye persons As for my selfe I was sometime of contrary opinion but soone after I began to repent my selfe seeing that howe many children soeuer a man hath if they bee strong they are but so many seruants to princes if they be of spirite and knowe ought then make they slender account of their parents Some giue themselues to lawe and estate of Iustice others to lay holde on benefices others to followe new opinions which makes them oftentimes fall from aloft to a hotter place then willingly they would but if voluptuous pleasures once catch hold on them God knowes what honor they doe then to their linage It was my chance sometime to be in a Countrey thicke beset with barren mountaines where ordinarily was to be seene an infinite throng of Potters or drudging penny-getters whereof daily resorted to Venice a very great number so that when any child happened to be borne in that countrey the inhabitants woulde say as a common Prouerbe this is a young Asse for the Venetian If I should recite the latest comforts that children bring vs I must borrowe the words vsed in Fraunce that in their youth they befoâ— their fathers and mothers and when they are great they serue for nothing but to vexethem Consider what pleasure they bring to their parents when newes is heard of them that they haue beene abroad all night keeping il rule and then come home with their heades broken their armes shiuered in peeces their eares cut off Or if worde bee brought their fathers that they are in prison for some batterie or carried to the Gallies for some theft or that they haue gotten the soule discase or to make amends for their misbehauiour they haue beaten the seruants of the house broken perforce their fathers counting houses and then fledde away with all the money Then when they are returned againe if the good man but shewe himselfe agreeued answere is made he may be ashamed in so dooing I haue at the tongues ende an infinite number more of troubles to recount which issue from this goodly increase but for the present time I am content to omit them and now to vse silence to shunne offence as well of you as my selfe who with very ill will doe speake of such matters For the Exiled Declamation 9. That it is better to be banished than continue in Libertie IF such as are mightie and vertuous take no displeasure by being banished or sent into exile what need they feare that haue not so much to loose their harts not reaching so high nor their mindes addicted to so great enterprises A Philisopher a man of councell and prudence execised in affaires for the weale publique a Captaine or ruler of a Cittye may with some reason finde himselfe agreeued and sorry to bee sent away thorow report mallice or otherwise in that he exercised his authoritie to the benefite of euerie one and notwithstanding whatsoeuer paines he tooke yet he had therein delight and pleasure Neuerthelesse we finde left by the most expert and auncientest that they reputed exile to be an honour and contentment of their mindes Witnesse heereof is the honest answere of good Diogenes to him that reprooued him as with a matter ignominious because the Sinopians had banished him their countrey Quoth he this rather ought to returne far greater shame to thee that thou hast neuer byn forth of thy countrey resembling Oysters heerein that neuer dare come forth of their shelles but are continually beaten against stones and rocks As hurtfull in my opinion is the want of courage heerein and such as are ignorant of the great number of priuiledges which the banished haue in their exile whereof I will make some breâ—fe recitall to deliuer yee from occasion of maruel why many of our elders with good will made choise of exile and did so patiently endure the same First of all I may say that the banished giue no cause to others of falling into the sinne of enuie and during the time of their flight or absence very fewe are so bolde as to aske them mony for interest for each one knowes wel enough that poore exiles haue rather more neede of their helpe then hinderance Wherefore they may without blushing or vsing any other conscience borrowe the more easilie importuning disquieting them they haue to deale withall for vnder this aduantage of beeing out of theyr countrey and giuen to vnderstand that their goods are confiscated they may without any other oration require the aide and succour of euery one The banished finds himselfe not troubled with lodging strangers nor is indebted or bound to making of banquets to attire himselfe sumptuouslie beare Armes day and night to goe honourably accompanied companied for the credit of his house to shew himselfe braue and magnificent But he may well vaunt if so he thinke it good that when he was in his countrey he kept a table for all commers did wonders was rich and honourablie attired and had the traine of a braue Caualier after him Beside it will bee no dishonour to the man exiled if hee keepe not alwaies his promise or make deliuerie of that hee standes bounde for at the time by him prefixed And so it happens that many seeme satisfied by acknowledging their good turnes or promise of paiyng all if euer they may returne into their long desired Countrey And doubt not but many desire to pertake with this goodly priuiledge for sparing of expences and to deliuer themselues from very great troubles For the banished are not bound to keepe a