when thy poor Soul is sick of Sin hath wounds of the Spirit is stript of its Innocence and starved for Grace no Regard is given thereunto not considering that though thou usest humane Helps yet it is God that gives the Blessing and is the Phisitian both of Soul and Body That Soul which acts the Part of a faithful Servant to the Lord shall have a double Reward the Crown of a Saint and of a Sufferer The Soul is Spiritual but Sin makes it Carnal the Soul is Immortal sin is the Death of the Soul and being contaminated therewith it makes us die unto Grace and to live in Grief the Soul is noble but sin makes it ignobleâ— the Soul is Lord but sin inslaves it the Soul is Soveraign sin brings it into subjection the Soul is God-like sin makes it beastial the Soul is the Spouse of God sin makes it the Strumpet of the Devil the Soul is the Jewel of God sin casts it into the Devils Fire the Soul is a Free-born Citizen of Heaven sin keeps it in perpetual Imprisonment the Soul is Gods Purchase sin cheats God of his due and the Soul of Eternal Bliss Wouldst thou be truely perfect Love God with all thy Heart and thy Neighbour as thy self Let thine Eye be always upon God and thy self and thou shalt never see him without Goodness nor thy self without Miseryâ— none shall see God so much as he is visible neither shall any love God so much as he is amiable He that doth not covet to love God more and more can never love him enough to whom God is all in all the World and all the Delights of it ought to be nothing at all Let us be what God will so we be but his and let us not be what we will our selves against the Will of God In the Service of God there is nothing little enough to be rejected And to meditate much upon God is good but the Souls great Advancement is Vertue and it consists in much loving of him he to whom alone is pleasing is displeased at nothing but that which displeaseth God in Divine Matters a generous Soul finds greatest Contentment in believing things most difficult all our Actions take their value from their Conformity to the Will of God Love and Suffering are the greatest Duties we owe to God they being the two Causes for which he dyed for us he that neglects his own Will complies best with Gods Will. So love thy Neighbour here upon Earth as thou mayst enjoy his Love in Heaven thou canst not love thy Neighbour too much but thou mayst make too much shew of thy Love to him one great Argument of our Love to our Neighbour is to bear with his Imperfections we should never endure to hear any more evil spoken of him than of our selves we should never undervalue any Person the Workman loveth not that his Work should be despised in his Presence especially wherefore beware for God is present every where and every Man and Woman in the World are his Work It is a Spiritual Injustice to desire co know the Secrets of others and to conceal our own We ought not to love our Neighbour only because he is good or because we hope he will be so but because God hath commanded us so to do In holy Duties we should speak little think much and do more it is a great evil not to do good the Just man never dies unprepared for he is prepared for Death who perseveres in Justice to the End Confidence in an unfaithful man in time of trouble is like a brooken Tooth or a Foot out of Joynt as he that taketh away a Garment in cold weather and as Vinegar is upon Nitre so is he that singeth Songs to one that hath a heavy Heart it is no shame to be poor though some count it acrime Nature brought us so into the World and so we must return dost thou want things that are necessary grumble not perchance it was necessary thou shouldst want them however if thou seekest them let it be by a lawful Remedy or Meanes If God do not bless thy Endeavours yet do thou bless him that knoweth what is best for thee Thou art God's Patient prescribe not to thy Physiâ—ian art thou caluminated examine thy own Conscience if thou findest it spotted thou hast a just Correction if not guilty thou hast a very fair Instruction use both and so shalt thou distill Honey out of Gall and make to thy self a secret Friend of an open Enemy if thy Enemy be hungry give him Bread if thirsty give him Drink thou thereby shalt heap Coals of Fire upon his Head and a Reward into thy own bosom Charity makes God our Debtor for the Poor are his Receivers Hast thou an Estate wouldst increase it devide thy Riches to the Poor these Seeds that are scattered do bring forth their Increase but such as are hoarded up they dye Correction without Instruction makes the Master a Tyrant and the Servant a Novice That man is a compleat Conquerour that can subdue his own Passions faithful are the wounds of a Friend but the Kisses of an Enemy are deceitful Arm thy self against a profest Adversary but he that dissembleth Frindship strikes beyond a Caution and wounds above a Cure from the one thou mayst deliver thy self but from the other Good Lord deliver thee A man that flatttreth his Neighbour spreadeth a Net for his feet the Touchstone tryeth Gold and Gold tryeth Men virtue must be the guide of all Qualities otherwise the Professors thereof are undone As the Servants of God are known by their two Vertues Humiliation and Charity so the Servants of the Devil are known by their opposite Vices Pride and Cruelty The best way to keep good Acts in memory is to refresh them with new ones to boast is but vain since the greatest Conquerour is but the measure of his own shadow and shall find it no longer than it was before his Victory believe not Soothsayers for Prophecies are never understood till they are accomplished The World is a wide Prison and every Day is an Execution day our Stomacks are very common Sepulchres of Birds Beasts Fish they all die to feed us Lord with how many Deaths are our Lives patcht up and how full of Death is the whole Life of Man beware of too much Drink where Drunkenness is and doth reign Reason is banished into Exile Vertue is made a Stranger and God himself is become an Enemy Blaspemies are accounted Wit and Oaths are Rhetorick and Secrets are made open Proclamations Whosoever will arrive at a new Life must pass by the old Death of the old he that is truly humbled never thinks himself wronged the good Man is well contented with a moderate Estate not so much taking notice of those that have more as those that have less in this World than himself He that most mortifies his natural Inclinations receiveth most Spiritual Inspirations to shun the accidental Troubles
Prison Thoughts WRITTEN BY Thō Browning CITIYEN AND COOK OF LONDON Who hath been a PRISONER in Ludgate ever since the Twelveth day of August 1680. Dum Spiro Spero in Deum Adjutorem meum London Printed and are to be Sold by the Author in Ludgate who is still a Prisoner there Anno 1682. To the Worshipful Geo. Dashwood Esq Dame Margeret his Wife the Lady Elizabeth Hare their Daughter John Pery Esq Mrs. Katherine Browning my Wife where ever she is and to all that are related to their Families Grace and Peace NOtwithstanding my many great Troubles I have had some retired Thoughts in my Adolescens which are here brought to publick View and do desire you to Patronize the same If you and others shall find such benefit by reading them as I have done by writing the same my ends are answered Time was when I had no Thoughts of putting my self in Print but Necessitas non habet Legem These are my first Fruits as an Offering to the World which pray accept I do intend another suddenly which perhaps may be more acceptable and sell better than this My weak Endeavours shall not be any whit wanting therein Who am Your Most Humble and Obedient Servant in the Lord Thomas Browning Nosse Teipsum Vivat Rex Curret Lex Floret Grex. Finis Coronat Opus A Coppy of a Letter sent to my Wife My Admiration IN my Fifty Eighth Letter I sent you some Verses and this is my Fifty Ninth where you may find an Epistle which pray peruse It is in vain to expect any Approbation from you having never yet received one Line in Writing from your Hand And perceiving that you are resolved neither to see nor send to me I do think that this may be the last time that I may trouble you in Writing only remember that you have abused neglected slighted and robbed a most Indulgent and loving Husband for which I pray God to give you a hearty Repentance before it be too late and there be no meanes left to help your self as likewise all those who have unlawfully and very malitiously advised against me without any Cause And if you or they have any Pretences I do hereby dare either to make them known to me or the World assuring that mine shall shortly be made known in Print with as much Severity as Truth will bear who am still you Loving though most Abused Husband Thomas Browning Prison Thoughts c OH despised despised despised rejected rejected rejected and Destroyed by you my own Dear Wife whose Name is Katherine Browning I pitty I pitty I pitty and shall not cease Praying for you Day and Night that you may be converted when you hear of Brownings Death occasioned by your meanes you may shed a tear for him if there be any Grace in you none ought to despise their own Flesh Whom God hath Joyned together let none put ader And if you had not gone from me you might have been Mistriss of our Company they have chosen an old Master this year in my stead Take heed of these dreadful Sentences You that are filthy be filthy still There remains no more Sacrifice for Sin but a fearful looking for of Judgment Fiery Indignation and fierce Anger of the Lord with a Go ye Cursed into Everlasting Fire prepared for Divels and Damn'd Spirits From which Place Good Lord deliver us My Epistle begins Few and evil have been the days of my Pilgrimage I have had for Inheritance the Months of Vanity and painful Nights have been appointed unto me and do know that hereafter is laid up for me a Crown of Righteousiness and not for me only but for all them who love the appearance of the Lord Jesus Therefore all the days of my Life will I wait as a Hireling till my Change shall come For I desire to be Dissolved and to be with Christ and do long to remove out of the Body to dwell with the Lord For I do know that if this Earthly House of my Tabernacle were destroyed I have a Bulilding given of God that is a House not made with Hands but Eternal in the Heavens Therefore I sigh desiring to be cloathed with my House which is from Heaven and I do heartily look for and do hope that in noth ng I shall be ashamed but that with all confidence Christ shall be magnified in my Body whether it be by Life or Death for whither I live it is to the Lord or whether I die it is to the Lord therefore whether I live or die I am the Lords To Him therefore be Praise and Glory for evermore I have fought a good Fight I have kept the Faith and do know in whom I have Believed and am perswaded that he is able to keep that which I have committed to his Charge Against that Day the Lord will quicken my mortal Body and make it like to his own Glorious Body Yea though after my Skin Worms destroy this Body yet I shall see God in my Flesh whom I my self shall see and mine Eyes shall behold and none other for me though my Reins be consumed within me therefore I willingly lay down my Life and commit my Soul unto God as unto my faithful Creator How excellent is thy Mercy O God therefore do I trust under the Shadow of thy Wings O blessed is the man whom thou dost choose and causest to come unto thee he shall dwell in thy Courts and shall be satisfied with the Pleasures of thine House even of thy Holy Temple thou shalt give him drink out of the Rivers of thy Pleasures for with thee is the Well of Life and in thy Light shall we see Light send me therefore thy Light and thy Truth and let thy good Spirit lead me unto the Land of Righteousness Carry me O Lord by thy Mercy and bring me in thy Strength to thy Holy Habitation Plant me in the Mountain of thine Inheritance even in the Place which thou hast prepared and the Sanctuary which thou hast Established that I may see the Goodness of the Lord in the Land of the Living Let me behold thy Face in Righteousness and let me be satisfied with thine Image for in thy Presence is the Fulness of Joy and at thy right Hand are Pleasures for evermore Into thy Hands O Lord I commend my Spirit for thou hast Redeemed it O Lord God of Truth Lord Jesus receive my Spirit The end of the upright man is Peace As many as walk according to this Rule Peace shall be upon them and upon the Israel of God Now unto Him that is able to keep us that we fall not and to present us faultless before the Presence of his Glory with Joy to God only-wise be Glory Majesty Dominion and Power both now and ever ever ever Amen Ludgate The 12th of April 1682. For my most Esteemed Mistriss Katherine Browning These This was sent to her Aunt Madam Margaret Dashwood by the hand of Mr. Joseph Steed her Nephew to
thou and art so cast down and disquieted within thy self Dost thou well to be angry with my Chastisements And why art thou offended that I should make thee like my self Causing thee to walk in the way of inward and outward Griefs which I did tread before thee Why refusest thou to take up my Cross and follow me and to taste of that Cup which I drank before and for thee The Soul Oh Lord give me of thy Spirit and all trouble with thee or for thee shall be sweet unto me What ever thou didst Oh Lord it was for me and if I were so disposed as I should then would I be content to bear all that thou my God shouldst be pleased to lay upon me But alas it is my cursed Corruptions that makes me think thy Cross my Burthen Lord therefore uphold me by thy Grace that I may count thy Yoak easie and find joy in these Sufferings with thee The Lord. I know the Cause of thy Grief and Terrour to be the Consideration of thy Sins But I pray thee Why lookest thou so to thy Sins that thou lookest not to my Mercies Why wouldst thou so extol thy evil Deeds that thou shouldst extenuate my rich Mercies or any way compare the one with the other Was it for thy good Deeds that I did first enter into Friendship with thee And thinkest thou now that for thy evil Deeds I will utterly forsake thee Seeing it is among my Praises that the Work which I have begun I will perfect it I like it well indeed to see thee grieved for the Sins thou hast committed against me But I would also have thee comforted in the Mercies that I have shewed thee Call to mind my Works of old what I have done to thee since thou canst remember How cared I for thee in thy young and tender Years Look back now and see Did not the Angel of my Presence lead thee when thou hadst no wisdom nor strength to govern thee Did not I then begin to acquaint thee with the Knowledge and Fear of my Name Canst thou deny now that my Mercy preserved thee from many Sins whereunto thy Nature was prone and ready to have declined And when thou sinnedst with what long patience have I waited thy turning and how lovingly have I winked at thy Transgressions And when I had given thee Grace to repent of thy Sins and to seek for my Favour and Mercy for the Sins of thy youth with a melting heart and a mourning eye Canst thou deny that I have filled thy Heart with my Joys and made thy tongue to burst out in singing and glorying Speeches And why then wilt thou not trust in my Mercies to the end The Soul I were O Lord most unthankful if I should not confess that many a time in the multitude of my thoughts thy Mercies have comforted me But alas I have not answered thy Loving Kindness for after many Mercies received I have sinned against thee contrary to my Light and my sins are now before me witnessing that I am unworthy to taste of the sweetness of thy Mercies any more The Lord Is my Mercy only for a Day or a Year Or is it for ever and ever towards those that I have made mine in Christ Jesus Wilt thou restrain my Mercies and limit them within thy narrow Bounds as to think they cannot be extended over all thy Transgressions Wilt thou measure my Mercies with so narrow a span as to think that I have no more to give than thou hast to receive Is it not among my Praises That I am able to do exceeding abundantly above all that my Children can ask or think of me Knowest thou not that as the Heavens are above the Earth so are my Thoughts above thine Hast thou not considered that my Mercy is above all my Works How much more then is it above thee who art nothing in comparison of my mighty Works And if it be above thee how much more above all thou canst do Why then wilt thou match thy Sins with my Mercies If I require such Mercy in my Children that I will have them to forgive one another not only seven times but seventy times seven times What pitty compassion and readiness to forgive is in my self Therefore my Beloved despair not for the multitude of thy Sins but be comforted with my Promises of Mercy I have made them without Exceptions of Sins For albeit they were Sins of Scarlet they shall be made white as Wool I have made them without exception of Persons For whosoever shall depart from his Wickedness and turn to me I will receive him Let this threefold Vniversality of my Promises sustain thee that thy Infidelity contract not my Mercy into narrower bounds than I have extended them The Soul Be merciful O Lord to my Infidelity I believe in part Lord help my Unbelief Establish and confirm my unstable heart with thy good Spirit My Conscience doth in such sort condemn me that I stand in fear of thy Justice for thou art greater than my Conscience and wilt much more condemn me if thou dost enter into Judgment with me The Lord Oh my Beloved consider that the Cause of thy present Vnquietness is because with the one Eye thou lookest to thy Sins and my Fathers Justice and with thy other Eye lookest not to me in whom his Justice is satisfied and thy Sins punished already Tell me I pray thee Thinkest thou in thy self to get such a Holiness of thy Disposition that which shall exempt thee from the Fear of his Justice Or art thou content to seek it in me If in thy self thou seekest it remember what thou art doing Wilt thou have the Lord bound and oblieged to thee Wilt thou be thy own Saviour Or shall it be said His Mercy Saved thee not If no misery were in thee whereupon should his Mercy be manifested And if thy disposition in the Earth be such as it should be then what remains but that the Praise of his Mercy should fall to the ground Turn thee therefore to me and seek thy Life in me If thou wilt know what is thine thou art a Sinner Let my Praise be reserved to my self I am thy Saviour Esteemest thou that my words are ineffectual or that there is no force in my Suffering Countest thou thy Sins so deadly that my Merit Vertue cannot cure them Will a Physitian pour out a rare Ointment either where no need it or where it cannot profit and thinkest thou that my Father would have my Blood to be shed in vain If his Justice terrifies thee remember his Justice was satisfied in me and that he pronounceth this Sentence Himself This is my Beloved Son in whom I am well pleased I came into the Wâ—â—ld not to call the Righteous but Sinners to Repentance Tarry not from me because thou art a Sinner but for that Cause come unto me I will refresh thee The Soul Oh Lord I know there is a cleansing and recoâ—â—ding
of this Life is to meditate often upon Eternity It 's the great misfortune of man to desire those things which he should only use To have a desire not to be poor to receive the Inconveniences of it is too great Ambition for it is to desire the Honour of Poverty the Commodity of Wealth There is no way happily to end a true Spiritual Life better than dayly to begin it He that would have a Part with Jesus glorified must first take part with Christ crucified we should live in this present Evil World as if our Souls were in Heaven and our Bodies in the Grave In the death of our Passions consists the Life of our Souls It is not Humility to acknowledge our selves miserable that is only to be a Beast but it is Humility to desire that others should esteem us so There is no reason to be given for the Fault we commit in Sin for the Fault would not be Sin if it were not against Reason Vertues have not their full Growth but when they have Desires to bring forth Advantage which like Spiritual Seeds serve to bring forth and produce new degrees of Virtues We should never speak of God or the Things which concern his Service carelesly or by way of Common Discourse or Entertainment but always with a great respect and humble mind We should fear the Judgments of God without Discouragement and encourage our selves without Presumption The ready way for the Soul to have Peace with its self is to obtain his Peace with God we may perform many Holy Actions and yet not please God if we neglect to do what he requires of us no more than a Painter in representing an Eagle pleaseth him that desired a Bee Let us never look on our Crosses but through the Cross of Jesus Christ thereby we shall find them pleasant and have fresh Desires to be afflicted Desire to obtain the Love of God makes us to meditate but that Love once obtained makes us contemplate The Fear of the Lord is the Beginning of Wisdom and the Price of Wisdom is above Rubies Oh let my Prayers be set before thee as Incense and the lifting up of my Hands be as the Evening Sacrifice O Lord my Strength and most mighty Redeemer Oh my Soul What fearful tremblings are these that have seized upon thee now So that the Thoughts of God that have been and ought to be thy greatest Comforts are now become thy Amazement Whence is this miserable Altaration that thou must behold nothing but Judgment in the Father of Mercies and Anger in the Fountain of Love What hath provoked him that delights to spare to be resolved to punish Surely my Sins are very many for it is not a few that will insense him and they have more than ordinary Aggravations for he is not so highly displeased at small Offences and certainly I have often committed them and long continued in them for he begins not to frown upon the first Misdemeanour Alas Alas the Cause is too apparent my Sins are both very many and exceeding great frequently repeated with heynous Circumstances and of long continuance I have despised Mercy now am like to feel Judgment most miserable Wreth that I am I have tired out the Patience of a long-suffering Father and have run away from the Embraces of a Loving Saviour and have rejected the Offers of a most indulgent Holy Spirit so that now I fear I have stopt up the Fountain of his Mercy and unsealed the Treasure of his Vengeance and I ought to wonder how God could spare me so long then why he should strike me now since many have been cut off for fewer and lesser sins I see that I have deserved most justly to suffer the worst of Evils And therefore shall esteem it an incomparable Favour to be only corrected with Temporal Afflictions if I might be so excused but it is a fearful thing to fall into the Hands of the Living God Therefore O Lord my Flesh trembleth for very Fear of thee and I am afraid of thy most heavy Judgments yet I know no way to escape them To deny my Sins were great Impudence and to Excuse them will be Apparent Hypocrisy and to be concealed is impossible to be found intollerable I am miserably confounded but was never any in this sad Case before that I might receive some Advice and Comfort from them Yes surely the Church hath presented me with a King and a Prophet both dear to God whose Fears were greater though their Sins were less and their danger not so great as mine Yet these in the midst of their Fear considered their Sins as the only Cause of their Evils and accordingly they freely confessed them bitterly lamented and exceedingly humbled themselves for them not striving so much to avoid them in the Punishment as to obtain the Pardon of their Offences knowing that the guilt once removed thou wouldst totally spare them or gently chastise them for their good where they rendred themselves up into thy Hands rather aggravating than extenuating their Sins and yet humbly begging that they might be corrected in Mercy and they found the Benefit of it Go to then O my Soul and do thou likewise thou hast occasioned Gods Wrath by the Breach of his most holy Laws O do not increase it by mistrusting the blessed Gospel thou hast forsaken him by Sin do not run from him by Despair for the faster that thou runnest from his Mercy the sooner thou shalt be sure to meet with his Justice delay no longer but go in before he sends for thee accuse thy self before thou art Indicted and confess thy Sins freely before the Witnesses be called out against thee pass sentence on thy self before the Judge come to condemn thee I cannot expect wholly to escape but it will be a great Favour if I meet only with a Sickness instead of Death Losses in my Estate instead of loosing my God and my Soul both for ever I will not therefore desire my Heavenly Father altogether to lay aside his Rod but only to use it genâ—ly that I may by this smart be warn'd against those future sins that would bring me to utter Ruine O Lord rather chastise me than dis-inherit me and those Stripes shall be welcome which come in an exchange for Eternal Torments For thou who dost change thy Sword into a Rod I hope will be so compassionate in thy Afflictions that I shall only feel what my destempered Soul needs to recover it and my Flesh and Spirit cannot bear not what my Sins deserve and thy Justice might exact wherefore I will no longer hide my sins but by an humble hearty Confession will declare that I hate them more than I fear to fall into thy most merciful Hands and I hope hereafter that I shall so fear to offend that I shall be freed from those sad Expectations of thy heavy Wrath which Wisdom God grant me for my Saviour Jesus Christ's Sake He that hath
Heart against them O Blessed Jesus that knowest the Necessities of all thy Vniversal Commands to Repentance to all men methinks seems to be peculiarly directed to me who have neglected this most necessary Duty hitherto thou O Lord seest my Danger and pittiest my Approaching Ruine I Bow my Head and Heart and neither can or dare disobey so gracious and loving Advice so useful and necessary a Warning thy bare Words hath been sufficient to command Obedience from me who do expect Eternal Salvation by thee but thou art pleased further to convince me I do believe dearest Jesus the Benefit is great if I shall turn now while thy Grace is offered so freely to all People I know the danger is dreadful if I delay any longer since 't is certain that thy Kingdom shall come but uncertain now soon either Death shall Arrest me or Judgment surprise me in such Delays I have great cause to bless thy Name that neither of these have happened yet unto me though I have even excluded thee out of my Heart and entertained my Sins there yet Lord thou callest on me still and now I am making what hast I can O remember not how long I have staid but consider how little time I have left and by the help of thy Grace make my Work short and easie proportionable to my Time and Strength I confess that I knew before but I never considered it till now and now I dare not stay but through thy help I come O do not cast me off for thy Mercies sake Oh my Soul thou art surely seized with a strange Distemper which resists the Efficacy of the choisest Remedies the Plaister which cures others doth not avail me I confess my Offences every day on my bended Knees but my Faith is Weak my Hope Wavering my sense of Gods Love very small so that I am almost tempted to live like those that are unconverted and unconcerned whether they sin or no because I find no Benefit by all my Humiliations and this Temptation had prevailed if I had not seen that since others receive some Advantage by these meanes the fault is in me and not in them nor in the God whom I Serve he cannot deny his Promises falsifie his Word nor reject those when they come who come upon his Courteous Invitation O where then is this accursed thing that restrains Gods Mercies blasts my Endeavours and puts me upon Injurious Thoughts against Heaven Atheistical Resolutions of totally neglecting those Holy Things the Matter of my Duty is good for God commands it the Benefit is great for many have found it to be so but Is it done in a right manner The failing may be there I have been more careful to kneel reverently look sadly sigh grievously and tell the Almighty a Story of my Sinful Life with Addresses becomming a Penitent but this comes far short of what God requires even a Broken Heart and a Contrite Spirit for I have been so concerned to seem sorrowful that I have not endeavoured really to be so O my God thou that searchest the Heart and tryest the Reins thou hast seen my Heart untouch't in the midst of these Pretences I have not been smitten with the Odiousuess of my Sins to thee nor the Danger to me and therefore I have not fully renounced them nor yet absolutely returned to thee and thy Ways and therefore thou hast not blessed my Confessions which have been rather looked upon by me as an Indulgence to go on since my former were so easily pardoned than an Ingagement to forsake mine Iniquities but now I see my Vileness in making so slight Addresses for so great a Favour I discern my Folly to cheat my self of so considerable a Blessing and my Sloath to slip so many fair Opportunities by my deceitful Behavior before thee O Lord I have deceived my self I am hugely ashamed that having offended so dear and loving a Father I have not been really concerned more and having so gracious a God to turn to I am yet so far distant from him if I want Pardon or Peace the blame must be upon my own Negligence for thou art apt to give and ready to forgive long before thou punishest Sinners but soon intreated to receive Presents dost most joyfully lay aside thy Resolutions of Judgments when we promise our Purpose of Amendment O my Soul will not this real Goodness of thy God shame thy Hyppocrisy Will it not pierce thine Heart to see whom thou hast offended and thaw thy Hopes to behold him whom thou art turning to his Holiness is mixed with Long-suffering his Justice with Mercy his Decrees allayed with Limitations and is it fit to approach him without Love or Fear Hopes or Desires Gratitude oâ— Admiration Or Is the Forgiveness too mean a Favour that it deserves no more Hearty Applications sure enough mine Hyppocrisy hath hindred my Pardon wherefore I begin to detest it and hereafter I will look more to the Disposition of my Heart than the Posture of my Body I will set him before me whose Love I have abused and whose Patience I have tried who is so gracious as to spare me and so willing to be Reconciled to a most ungrateful Wretch that when I come to him I may have my Eyes filled with Tears and my Cheeks with Blushes and my Heart with Sorrow I will remembeâ— who I am that go so that my Heart may be humâ—â—e and what I go for that I may be earnest and who I go to that I may be full of Faith and Hope so thaâ— my Addresses may not be in vain but that all these gracious Attributes may be made good unto me for Jesu Sake to whom be Glory for ever Thomas Brownings 's Prayer O Lord prepare my unprepared and sinful Heart by thy Holy and Blessed Spirit to Pray unto thee for Jesus Christ his Sake pour down into my Heart thy Spirit of â—race Supplication and Humiliation good God do away mine Iniquities and remember my Transgressens no more help me to pour out my Soul before thee under a deepsence of and a true sorrow for all my Sins which I have most wickedly and grieviously committed against thy Divine Majesty from time to time help me to pray with the Spirit and with Understanding let thy Spirit help my Infirmities with Sighs and Groans that cannot be expressed strike my Heart with an Awe and Dread of thy Maiesty help me to approach thy Presence with Reâ—erence a Godly Shame and Holy Trembling there is no secret Thoughts afar off help me to confess my Sins with a true Sorrow for the same help me to depart from all Iniquity that it may not be my Ruine let me hate all Sin with a perfect Hatred and avoid the very Appearance of Evil let me no longer regard any Iniquity in my Heart least it prove my undoing knowing that the very Hope of the Hyppocrite stall perish but work in me a Godly Sorrow for my sin which may cause a