do_v for_o thou_o what_o shall_v i_o say_v unto_o thou_o i_o can_v be_v content_v that_o these_o line_n be_v write_v with_o my_o very_a heart_n blood_n so_o that_o they_o may_v affect_v thou_o o_o i_o have_v rather_o die_v than_o receive_v another_o such_o letter_n from_o you_o i_o can_v not_o relish_v it_o it_o be_v bitter_a i_o can_v not_o see_v the_o name_n of_o dear_a jesus_n in_o it_o how_o can_v i_o think_v of_o your_o blind_a superstition_n and_o not_o mourn_v and_o lament_v over_o a_o dead_a soul_n you_o say_v you_o be_v sorry_a and_o you_o be_v trouble_v what_o be_v the_o matter_n be_v you_o sorry_a that_o i_o shall_v concern_v myself_o about_o my_o soul_n and_o about_o you_o you_o will_v not_o trouble_v yourself_o about_o these_o thing_n now_o if_o not_o now_o i_o pray_v when_o will_v you_o at_o the_o hour_n of_o death_n at_o the_o day_n oâ—_n judgement_n o_o then_o it_o will_v be_v too_o late_a o_o now_o oâ—_n never_o delay_n be_v dangerous_a o_o eternity_n eternity_n o_o 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to_o bed_n and_o he_o not_o mind_v i_o at_o which_o motion_n i_o do_v and_o so_o leave_v off_o for_o that_o time_n and_o at_o all_o time_n perform_v they_o against_o my_o will_n oh_o horrible_a blasphemy_n what_o not_o god_n see_v oh_o it_o be_v a_o wonder_n of_o wonder_n that_o god_n shall_v then_o have_v endure_v to_o see_v i_o any_o long_o out_o of_o hell_n oh_o infinite_a patience_n as_o for_o read_v i_o get_v little_a good_a by_o it_o and_o desire_v to_o get_v less_o and_o as_o for_o hear_v i_o must_v confess_v that_o those_o arrow_n shoot_v at_o a_o venture_n god_n do_v cause_v they_o so_o many_o time_n to_o hit_v yea_o and_o pierce_v too_o that_o it_o busy_v both_o i_o and_o the_o devil_n to_o get_v they_o out_o again_o and_o to_o heal_v the_o wound_n but_o usual_o i_o fix_v my_o mind_n upon_o somewhat_o else_o so_o that_o i_o seldom_o let_v any_o sentence_n sink_v too_o deep_a into_o my_o heart_n yea_o once_o the_o devil_n and_o my_o own_o wicked_a heart_n do_v so_o sar_n prevail_v that_o i_o be_v full_o resolve_v and_o in_o plain_a but_o damnable_a term_n i_o do_v even_o curse_n god_n and_o as_o it_o be_v bid_v defiance_n to_o all_o his_o ordinance_n and_o do_v rejoice_v that_o i_o have_v my_o tongue_n and_o conscience_n so_o much_o at_o command_n oh_o and_o how_o can_v i_o hold_v my_o pen_n to_o write_v this_o wherefore_o do_v i_o not_o fall_v down_o and_o become_v nothing_o before_o the_o lord_n of_o glory_n against_o who_o thus_o i_o have_v blaspheme_v but_o true_o i_o will_v not_o have_v reveal_v this_o have_v i_o not_o such_o a_o place_n as_o the_o 12._o of_o matthew_n and_o the_o 31._o verse_n to_o make_v to_o for_o a_o refuge_n after_o this_o i_o be_v wont_a to_o put_v that_o solemn_a ordinance_n of_o prayer_n to_o do_v the_o sad_a service_n in_o the_o world_n and_o that_o frequent_o o_o pity_n pity_v it_o have_v such_o a_o cruel_a master_n and_o that_o be_v i_o use_v it_o not_o to_o help_v i_o to_o destroy_v sin_n but_o make_v it_o a_o great_a 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and_o under_o the_o command_n of_o satan_n which_o doubtless_o have_v it_o go_v no_o further_o but_o you_o have_v end_v your_o life_n before_o the_o lord_n have_v turn_v your_o conviction_n into_o conversion_n it_o will_v have_v prove_v such_o a_o worm_n that_o will_v to_o all_o eternity_n have_v gnaw_v thy_o conscience_n so_o that_o the_o pain_n will_v have_v be_v intolerable_a but_o bless_v be_v god_n i_o be_o in_o great_a hope_n to_o hear_v that_o from_o you_o which_o will_v put_v i_o out_o of_o fear_n and_o give_v i_o cause_n to_o admire_v the_o goodness_n and_o power_n of_o god_n be_v very_o careful_a to_o keep_v your_o heart_n from_o pride_n and_o not_o to_o attribute_v any_o thing_n to_o your_o own_o goodness_n but_o to_o admire_v the_o grace_n of_o god_n and_o give_v glory_n to_o he_o and_o he_o alone_o conu._n oh_o dear_a friend_n for_o so_o i_o will_v call_v you_o and_o all_o that_o give_v i_o counsel_n about_o the_o good_a of_o my_o never_o die_a soul_n i_o be_o glad_a that_o the_o lord_n have_v put_v this_o into_o yourheart_n and_o i_o do_v beg_v your_o prayer_n to_o god_n that_o he_o will_v still_o humble_v i_o more_o and_o more_o for_o i_o be_o sure_a pride_n be_v a_o weed_n that_o will_v grow_v in_o the_o best_a garden_n much_o more_o in_o i_o which_o be_v a_o barren_a yet_o weedy_a soil_n but_o i_o have_v not_o do_v with_o all_o my_o soul-abasing_a consideration_n for_o when_o you_o have_v hear_v all_o which_o i_o through_o the_o grace_n of_o god_n be_o to_o declare_v unto_o you_o you_o will_v then_o say_v i_o have_v more_o cause_n to_o be_v humble_v than_o ever_o therefore_o pride_n be_v such_o a_o enemy_n i_o will_v earnest_o request_v you_o that_o when_o you_o hear_v i_o say_v any_o thing_n which_o do_v savour_n of_o my_o own_o good_a and_o not_o pure_o of_o god_n glory_n that_o you_o will_v reprove_v i_o and_o make_v i_o clear_v my_o meaning_n to_o you_o min._n i_o have_v still_o more_o cause_n to_o bless_v god_n for_o you_o in_o that_o you_o do_v so_o much_o suspect_v your_o own_o heart_n which_o be_v desperate_o wicked_a and_o deceitful_a and_o now_o to_o our_o present_a purpose_n what_o reason_n have_v you_o to_o think_v that_o your_o conversion_n be_v more_o effectual_o begin_v to_o be_v wrought_v upon_o you_o when_o you_o be_v about_o eighteen_o year_n of_o age_n conu._n oh_o i_o have_v great_a cause_n to_o think_v so_o for_o then_o the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o work_v such_o a_o work_n in_o i_o that_o have_v it_o be_v tell_v i_o before_o i_o can_v not_o in_o any_o wise_a have_v believe_v it_o min._n and_o now_o what_o do_v you_o think_v to_o be_v the_o first_o cause_n that_o move_v you_o to_o set_v your_o face_n sion-ward_n conu._n about_o two_o month_n before_o i_o see_v the_o sinfulness_n of_o sin_n even_o then_o when_o i_o be_v to_o every_o good_a word_n and_o work_v a_o reprobate_n and_o do_v deny_v no_o sin_n because_o it_o be_v sin_n although_o i_o may_v out_o of_o some_o self_n end_v as_o to_o deny_v 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a_o book_n which_o the_o lord_n at_o that_o time_n open_v my_o heart_n to_o ask_v for_o which_o be_v drex_n d._n eternit_fw-la and_o true_o upon_o the_o perusal_n of_o that_o treatise_n i_o think_v nay_o i_o be_o sure_a the_o burden_n of_o my_o sin_n seem_v to_o be_v renew_v and_o i_o can_v express_v that_o unspeakable_a sorrow_n which_o i_o then_o have_v in_o my_o poor_a soul_n by_o reason_n of_o all_o its_o mighty_a sin_n and_o true_o i_o hope_v the_o mercy_n of_o god_n be_v not_o a_o little_a cause_n of_o my_o trouble_n to_o think_v that_o i_o shall_v have_v none_o to_o offend_v and_o kick_v against_o but_o those_o bowel_n yea_o those_o tender_a bowel_n of_o pity_n and_o compassion_n which_o have_v so_o long_o yearn_v over_o my_o poor_a soul_n and_o have_v so_o long_o shield_v off_o the_o stroke_n of_o justice_n which_o be_v so_o long_o hang_v over_o my_o provoke_a head_n and_o then_o oh_o then_o i_o do_v unspeakable_o desire_v the_o pardon_n of_o my_o sin_n and_o then_o do_v feel_v the_o burden_n of_o they_o so_o unsupportable_a that_o i_o do_v earnest_o beg_v of_o the_o lord_n that_o they_o may_v be_v lay_v upon_o the_o lord_n jesus_n who_o be_v able_a to_o bear_v they_o and_o do_v endeavour_v by_o earnest_a prayer_n to_o obtain_v a_o smile_n from_o god_n in_o and_o through_o jesus_n christ_n for_o out_o of_o christ_n he_o be_v a_o terrible_a god_n and_o a_o consume_a fire_n and_o so_o i_o forthwith_o resolve_v to_o take_v up_o with_o all_o outward_a duty_n as_o prayer_n reading_n hear_v confer_v with_o good_a christian_n and_o i_o can_v but_o let_v you_o know_v that_o the_o first_o sermon_n i_o hear_v in_o this_o condition_n be_v out_o of_o 1_o tim._n 1.15_o where_o it_o be_v say_v that_o christ_n come_v into_o the_o world_n to_o save_v sinner_n of_o who_o i_o not_o paul_n only_o but_o i_o even_o i_o be_o chief_a and_o so_o i_o go_v on_o through_o fear_n and_o tremble_a and_o not_o without_o some_o joy_n and_o hope_n that_o the_o lord_n who_o have_v begin_v a_o good_a work_n in_o i_o will_v finish_v it_o in_o his_o good_a time_n which_o god_n grant_v for_o christ_n his_o sake_n min._n and_o be_v this_o which_o you_o have_v speak_v from_o your_o own_o experience_n be_v it_o indeed_o as_o i_o hope_v it_o be_v than_o i_o can_v no_o long_o for_o bear_v but_o say_v with_o good_a zacharias_n bless_a be_v the_o lord_n god_n of_o israel_n who_o have_v visit_v and_o redeem_v his_o people_n and_o among_o they_o thy_o poor_a soul_n and_o now_o i_o say_v again_o take_v heed_n of_o spiritual_a pride_n think_v very_o lowly_a of_o thyself_o and_o give_v glory_n to_o god_n and_o now_o dear_a heart_n give_v i_o leave_v for_o the_o good_a of_o thy_o eternal_a welfare_n to_o examine_v thou_o of_o some_o thing_n which_o thou_o have_v touch_v upon_o in_o the_o last_o discourse_n that_o so_o i_o may_v be_v assure_v that_o that_o work_n which_o the_o lord_n have_v begin_v in_o thou_o may_v prove_v as_o a_o tree_n plant_v and_o root_v in_o thy_o renew_a heart_n by_o the_o spirit_n of_o god_n and_o not_o of_o thy_o own_o set_n and_o for_o the_o accomplish_n of_o which_o weighty_a work_n it_o will_v be_v convenient_a to_o inquire_v what_o fruit_n it_o have_v since_o bear_v for_o the_o tree_n may_v be_v know_v by_o its_o fruit_n therefore_o in_o brief_a what_o have_v thou_o find_v in_o thy_o heart_n concern_v sin_n conu._n sin_n true_o i_o be_o not_o able_a now_o to_o express_v that_o unspeakable_a bitterness_n i_o then_o find_v in_o it_o oh_o how_o do_v i_o hate_v it_o and_o pursue_v it_o with_o the_o great_a zeal_n and_o detestation_n possible_a oh_o how_o do_v my_o heart_n rise_v at_o the_o very_a appearance_n of_o it_o and_o true_o if_o it_o do_v not_o very_o great_o deceive_v i_o i_o think_v i_o hate_v it_o more_o than_o death_n itself_o and_o shall_v have_v choose_v death_n rather_o than_o wilful_o commit_v the_o least_o know_a sin_n and_o if_o there_o have_v be_v no_o hell_n yet_o as_o i_o have_v often_o say_v sin_n shall_v have_v be_v my_o hell_n and_o holiness_n my_o heaven_n min._n i_o be_o glad_a to_o hear_v what_o thou_o have_v say_v but_o what_o sin_n be_v they_o thou_o so_o hate_v it_o may_v be_v they_o be_v great_a and_o dreadful_a fin_n as_o blasphemy_n and_o murder_n etc._n etc._n but_o what_o do_v thou_o think_v of_o heart_n sin_n and_o evil_a motion_n which_o i_o be_o sure_a will_v much_o beset_v thou_o conu._n oh_o of_o i_o know_v my_o own_o heart_n these_o be_v the_o great_a enemy_n that_o i_o have_v to_o encounter_v these_o be_v they_o that_o like_v unto_o so_o many_o goliah_n bid_v defiance_n to_o what_o christ_n have_v wrought_v in_o my_o poor_a soul_n and_o do_v endeavour_v to_o retake_v the_o fort-royal_a of_o my_o heart_n which_o the_o lord_n be_v about_o to_o make_v a_o temple_n for_o his_o glorious_a image_n to_o dwell_v in_o and_z oh_o bless_a be_v free_a grace_n and_o let_v all_o that_o hear_v of_o this_o stand_v and_o admire_v and_o give_v glory_n to_o god_n min._n the_o lord_n preserve_v this_o bless_a enmity_n still_o more_o and_o more_o in_o thy_o heart_n and_o now_o tell_v i_o which_o way_n thou_o wente_v about_o to_o engage_v against_o and_o so_o to_o overcome_v these_o great_a goliah_n though_o common_o know_v by_o the_o name_n of_o peccadillo_n conu._n oh_o now_o now_o you_o come_v very_o near_o i_o and_o this_o even_o pierce_v between_o the_o bone_n and_o marrow_n and_o the_o lord_n who_o be_v the_o searcher_n of_o heart_n and_o know_v the_o thought_n and_o act_n of_o every_o soul_n give_v i_o understanding_n in_o this_o point_n that_o i_o may_v say_v nothing_o but_o what_o i_o real_o find_v in_o my_o own_o soul_n oh_o than_o i_o do_v presume_v too_o much_o upon_o my_o own_o strength_n and_o do_v not_o lay_v they_o at_o the_o foot_n of_o christ_n who_o then_o i_o hope_v i_o take_v for_o my_o lord_n and_o king_n and_o do_v not_o as_o i_o fear_v whole_o depend_v upon_o his_o kingly_a power_n which_o be_v to_o overcome_v and_o subdue_v all_o those_o enemy_n which_o rise_v up_o in_o the_o heart_n of_o his_o child_n and_o make_v war_n against_o he_o and_o will_v not_o that_o he_o shall_v rule_v over_o they_o for_o sure_o have_v i_o thus_o do_v he_o will_v not_o have_v suffer_v they_o so_o often_o to_o assault_v i_o and_o even_o sometime_o overcome_v i_o as_o i_o shall_v god_n will_v make_v clear_a to_o you_o by_o and_o by_o min._n still_o i_o have_v great_a cause_n to_o admire_v the_o goodness_n of_o god_n to_o thy_o poor_a soul_n in_o that_o he_o have_v be_v please_v now_o to_o open_v thy_o eye_n to_o see_v this_o thy_o great_a mistake_n which_o doubtless_o have_v not_o the_o lord_n in_o time_n reveal_v it_o to_o thou_o it_o will_v have_v prove_v a_o sore_a evil_n and_o it_o may_v be_v thou_o may_v not_o have_v see_v it_o before_o it_o have_v be_v too_o late_o and_o now_o tell_v i_o which_o way_n thou_o wente_v about_o to_o destroy_v thy_o sin_n see_v thou_o be_v ignorant_a in_o great_a measure_n in_o apply_v the_o death_n of_o christ_n to_o kill_v they_o conu._n the_o chief_a instrument_n that_o i_o use_v in_o this_o work_n be_v prayer_n and_o sometime_o fast_v which_o i_o find_v very_o powerful_a to_o batter_v down_o the_o strong_a hold_n of_o satan_n in_o my_o poor_a soul_n for_o which_o doubtless_o i_o be_v not_o to_o be_v blame_v if_o so_o be_v that_o i_o have_v use_v they_o only_o as_o a_o mean_n to_o have_v raise_v up_o my_o heart_n to_o christ_n and_o so_o as_o they_o be_v appoint_v of_o god_n to_o be_v the_o way_n and_o mean_n whereby_o i_o may_v have_v recourse_n to_o he_o who_o alone_o be_v able_a for_o so_o great_a a_o work_n but_o woe_n to_o my_o ignorant_a and_o proud_a heart_n that_o will_v not_o total_o submit_v to_o god_n but_o idolise_v prayer_n and_o repentance_n and_o fast_v as_o if_o these_o have_v be_v the_o captain_n of_o the_o soul_n salvation_n whereas_o they_o be_v but_o empty_a in_o themselves_o and_o nothing_o worth_a no_o more_o than_o as_o they_o lead_v i_o to_o christ_n who_o alone_o be_v the_o captain_n and_o horn_n of_o my_o salvation_n min._n and_o now_o i_o think_v it_o will_v not_o be_v amiss_o to_o let_v i_o hear_v how_o you_o carry_v yourself_o in_o the_o great_a duty_n of_o prayer_n and_o how_o soon_o you_o enter_v upon_o the_o duty_n conu._n the_o lord_n be_v please_v within_o two_o or_o three_o day_n after_o my_o first_o trouble_n to_o incline_v my_o heart_n to_o seek_v he_o by_o prayer_n which_o i_o use_v constant_o twice_o a_o day_n beside_o some_o private_a ejaculation_n and_o sigh_n between_o while_n and_o i_o will_v now_o tell_v
and_o worship_n that_o and_o shall_v do_v what_o i_o do_v more_o to_o advantage_n self_n than_o christ_n oh_o i_o say_v again_o what_o a_o wonder_n it_o be_v that_o ever_o he_o be_v please_v to_o let_v i_o see_v my_o folly_n and_o oh_o if_o he_o shall_v not_o have_v do_v it_o yet_o in_o this_o particular_a how_o inexcusable_a have_v i_o be_v which_o will_v appear_v in_o the_o next_o answer_n min._n now_o let_v i_o know_v when_o and_o in_o what_o manner_n the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o magnify_v his_o grace_n in_o convince_a you_o of_o the_o insufficiency_n of_o your_o own_o righteousness_n and_o of_o the_o rest_n in_o duty_n conu._n i_o will_v likewise_o make_v this_o as_o plain_a to_o you_o as_o the_o lord_n shall_v enable_v i_o so_o that_o i_o may_v not_o be_v find_v guilty_a of_o a_o spiritual_a lie_n and_o to_o the_o best_a of_o my_o remembrance_n about_o four_o month_n after_o my_o powerful_a call_n when_o as_o i_o think_v i_o be_v assure_o in_o a_o most_o happy_a condition_n have_v pass_v through_o abundant_a of_o trial_n and_o temptation_n and_o i_o begin_v to_o find_v they_o somewhat_o to_o flee_v before_o i_o of_o which_o you_o shall_v hear_v anon_o more_o at_o large_a then_o oh_o then_o the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o put_v into_o my_o hand_n a_o little_a book_n entitle_v the_o christian_n great_a interest_n by_o mr._n guthry_n which_o when_o i_o peruse_v i_o find_v i_o be_v much_o concern_v in_o it_o and_o be_v somewhat_o trouble_v but_o it_o so_o violent_o accuse_v i_o of_o my_o dalilah_n righteousness_n which_o i_o love_v too_o well_o to_o see_v as_o i_o think_v abuse_v with_o a_o small_a sigh_n or_o the_o like_a i_o command_v it_o to_o depart_v and_o not_o to_o dare_v to_o come_v and_o control_n my_o idol_n self_n any_o more_o yet_o it_o make_v my_o way_n so_o plain_a before_o i_o that_o i_o can_v not_o withstand_v it_o a_o little_a while_n after_o the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o put_v into_o my_o hand_n another_o book_n for_o which_o i_o have_v abundant_a cause_n to_o bless_v god_n which_o be_v the_o sincere_a convert_n and_o read_v the_o latter_a part_n of_o that_o which_o treat_v concern_v carnal_a confidence_n and_o rest_v in_o duty_n all_o which_o do_v very_o much_o concern_v i_o i_o be_v very_o much_o trouble_v and_o begin_v to_o question_v my_o estate_n a_o little_a concern_v duty_n but_o true_o i_o take_v so_o little_a delight_n in_o this_o that_o i_o soon_o lay_v it_o by_o and_o return_v it_o to_o the_o place_n from_o whence_o it_o come_v and_o likewise_o i_o have_v other_o book_n as_o mr._n baxters_n self-denial_n which_o i_o read_v part_n of_o with_o much_o delight_n as_o in_o reference_n in_o deny_v self-pleasure_n and_o sinful_a recreation_n and_o vain_a company_n etc._n etc._n all_o these_o yield_a comfort_n to_o i_o because_o i_o find_v that_o i_o do_v real_o desire_v to_o deny_v myself_o all_o these_o and_o make_v it_o a_o great_a ground_n of_o comfort_n to_o i_o that_o i_o can_v so_o earnest_o desire_v their_o destruction_n but_o when_o i_o come_v to_o the_o denial_n of_o self-righteousness_n this_o be_v a_o hard_a say_n and_o self_n will_v not_o bear_v it_o but_o away_o i_o go_v to_o those_o book_n where_o i_o can_v find_v out_o as_o i_o think_v a_o way_n to_o heaven_n by_o my_o own_o work_n and_o those_o that_o treat_v most_o of_o a_o holy_a life_n be_v the_o most_o please_a to_o i_o but_o when_o i_o read_v concern_v christ_n or_o hear_v he_o teach_v to_o i_o by_o his_o minister_n for_o although_o i_o have_v omit_v how_o my_o heart_n be_v in_o hear_v yet_o i_o will_v desire_v you_o to_o include_v that_o and_o to_o suppose_v that_o my_o heart_n be_v in_o that_o as_o in_o read_v or_o confer_v with_o respect_n to_o the_o subject_n i_o say_v when_o i_o hear_v christ_n teach_v by_o his_o minister_n either_o in_o a_o pulpit_n or_o a_o book_n i_o much_o delight_v in_o that_o i_o hear_v or_o read_v but_o when_o justification_n alone_o by_o faith_n in_o christ_n merit_n and_o live_v by_o faith_n upon_o a_o naked_a christ_n as_o peradventure_o i_o may_v be_v put_v too_o upon_o a_o sick_a bed_n by_o reason_n of_o a_o violent_a disease_n or_o the_o like_a that_o i_o can_v not_o have_v strength_n of_o body_n nor_o composure_n of_o mind_n to_o perform_v duty_n as_o in_o a_o fever_n or_o a_o fit_a of_o the_o stone_n or_o gout_n etc._n etc._n i_o say_v when_o these_o noble_a and_o heavenborn_a mystery_n be_v treat_v on_o i_o be_v much_o to_o seek_v and_o can_v take_v but_o little_a comfort_n from_o they_o and_o so_o i_o go_v on_o from_o duty_n to_o duty_n and_o if_o at_o any_o time_n i_o find_v my_o heart_n dead_a and_o can_v for_o that_o day_n or_o week_n or_o month_n it_o may_v be_v find_v any_o comfort_n from_o they_o than_o i_o live_v in_o hope_n that_o although_o i_o find_v not_o all_o well_o at_o present_a yet_o it_o will_v not_o long_o continue_v so_o with_o i_o and_o so_o in_o some_o time_n i_o recover_v life_n and_o comfort_n again_o i_o say_v i_o continue_v thus_o for_o the_o space_n of_o above_o three_o year_n and_o now_o i_o will_v declare_v one_o thing_n which_o do_v more_o trouble_v i_o than_o ordinary_a and_o that_o be_v in_o august_n last_o 67._o it_o happen_v that_o as_o i_o be_v visit_v a_o patient_a and_o for_o this_o thing_n in_o particular_a i_o have_v cause_n to_o bless_v god_n that_o he_o place_v i_o in_o this_o my_o call_n who_o we_o suppose_v the_o lord_n will_v take_v away_o at_o that_o very_a time_n there_o come_v dr._n b._n to_o perform_v as_o be_v think_v onâ—_n of_o the_o last_o duty_n he_o have_v to_o do_v 〈◊〉_d and_o among_o his_o discourse_n and_o adâ—â—â—_n 〈◊〉_d bid_v she_o be_v sure_a to_o lay_v all_o her_o sin_n upon_o christ_n which_o i_o like_v very_o well_o but_o withal_o that_o she_o shall_v lay_v all_o her_o own_o righteousness_n at_o his_o foot_n and_o not_o at_o all_o â—o_o trust_v to_o any_o good_a she_o have_v in_o her_o seâ—f_n but_o whole_o to_o rely_v upon_o the_o merit_n of_o christ_n which_o when_o i_o hear_v my_o heart_n rise_v much_o against_o what_o he_o say_v and_o do_v much_o oppose_v his_o advice_n and_o think_v it_o not_o at_o all_o convenient_a to_o be_v speak_v and_o doubtless_o have_v i_o be_v in_o her_o condition_n i_o mean_v so_o near_a death_n as_o it_o be_v think_v she_o be_v and_o he_o have_v advise_v i_o to_o the_o same_o thing_n and_o have_v clear_v it_o to_o i_o oh_o what_o a_o dreadful_a visitation_n have_v that_o be_v sure_o it_o will_v have_v put_v my_o soul_n into_o such_o a_o dreadful_a agony_n of_o confusion_n if_o not_o despair_v that_o sure_o i_o shall_v have_v dye_v a_o second_o death_n before_o i_o know_v the_o pang_n of_o the_o first_o but_o oh_o i_o say_v again_o who_o can_v hear_v of_o this_o and_o not_o be_v overcome_v with_o soul_n ravish_v admiration_n of_o the_o love_n and_o goodness_n and_o patience_n of_o god_n towards_o such_o a_o wretched_a nothing_o as_o i_o be_v that_o ever_o he_o shall_v so_o long_o forbear_v from_o destroy_v that_o soul_n with_o eternal_a damnation_n that_o will_v not_o with_o the_o cord_n of_o love_n be_v draw_v to_o accept_v of_o so_o clear_a salvation_n but_o the_o lord_n be_v please_v still_o to_o keep_v this_o upon_o my_o heart_n and_o although_o i_o be_v somewhat_o trouble_v but_o as_o before_o again_o i_o go_v to_o my_o old_a physician_n and_o take_v a_o small_a pill_n of_o prayer_n compose_v of_o a_o little_a fear_n and_o humiliation_n but_o no_o soon_o it_o get_v into_o my_o heart_n but_o there_o it_o be_v guilt_n with_o pride_n and_o so_o again_o become_v pleasant_a to_o i_o and_o then_o i_o think_v all_o be_v well_o and_o i_o do_v desire_n earnest_o that_o by_o this_o god_n may_v be_v much_o glorify_v and_o again_o methinks_v i_o find_v my_o heart_n so_o mighty_o incline_v to_o go_v on_o in_o this_o work_n which_o at_o your_o request_n you_o may_v remember_v i_o be_v so_o unwilling_a to_o undertake_v that_o 〈◊〉_d have_v great_a hope_n there_o may_v be_v the_o hand_n of_o god_n in_o it_o and_o that_o it_o be_v he_o that_o put_v it_o into_o your_o heart_n to_o request_v if_o of_o i_o and_o i_o pray_v god_n it_o may_v be_v his_o glory_n alone_o that_o may_v move_v i_o to_o it_o and_o not_o any_o self-pride_n true_o you_o may_v say_v i_o have_v great_a cause_n to_o fear_v and_o not_o to_o trust_v my_o own_o heart_n any_o more_o and_o the_o lord_n preserve_v this_o jealousy_n more_o and_o more_o in_o i_o but_o to_o my_o present_a purpose_n and_o this_o which_o i_o be_o about_o to_o say_v may_v have_v prove_v a_o great_a disadvantage_n to_o i_o but_o i_o doubt_v not_o but_o the_o hand_n of_o god_n be_v in_o it_o although_o i_o see_v it_o
full_a everlasting_a freedom_n from_o evil_n or_o any_o imperfection_n 2._o it_o consist_v in_o a_o complete_a perfect_a and_o eternal_a enjoyment_n of_o all_o the_o good_a that_o our_o nature_n be_v capable_a of_o first_o it_o consist_v in_o a_o full_a and_o everlasting_a freedom_n from_o evil_n or_o any_o imperfection_n and_o here_o i_o shall_v insist_v upon_o some_o of_o those_o evil_n and_o imperfection_n which_o a_o child_n of_o god_n shall_v be_v free_v from_o as_o soon_o as_o ever_o death_n have_v let_v the_o soul_n out_o of_o the_o body_n first_o the_o saint_n be_v free_a from_o all_o sin_n the_o bolt_n shall_v be_v knock_v off_o the_o prison_n wall_n break_v down_o and_o the_o poor_a captive_n set_v at_o liberty_n o_o bless_a jubilee_n how_o glad_a will_v paul_n have_v be_v if_o when_o he_o cry_v out_o in_o such_o a_o agony_n o_o wretched_a man_n who_o shall_v deliver_v i_o if_o he_o have_v hear_v a_o voice_n from_o heaven_n say_v thy_o groan_n have_v pierce_v the_o cloud_n thy_o prayer_n have_v reach_v the_o heaven_n thy_o petition_n shall_v be_v grant_v immediate_o will_v not_o this_o have_v be_v grateful_a news_n when_o before_o a_o few_o day_n be_v at_o a_o end_n this_o shall_v be_v the_o condition_n of_o every_o one_o of_o god_n people_n now_o indeed_o if_o you_o listen_v to_o their_o closet_n you_o shall_v hear_v how_o doleful_o they_o bemoan_v their_o condition_n if_o you_o follow_v they_o into_o their_o family_n what_o be_v it_o that_o they_o will_v most_o desire_v of_o god_n be_v it_o not_o freedom_n from_o sin_n what_o complaint_n do_v they_o make_v of_o themselves_o that_o there_o shall_v be_v so_o great_a a_o unsutableness_n in_o they_o to_o god_n that_o their_o heart_n be_v unsensible_a of_o the_o worth_n of_o divine_a thing_n that_o they_o shall_v have_v so_o little_a love_n to_o the_o lord_n christ_n and_o be_v so_o little_o take_v with_o the_o kindness_n of_o the_o redeemer_n how_o weak_a and_o faint_a how_o cold_a and_o dull_a in_o duty_n how_o ready_a to_o betray_v their_o lord_n how_o cowardly_a in_o the_o cause_n of_o god_n but_o death_n will_v for_o ever_o silence_v these_o complaint_n death_n tare_n off_o joshua_n rag_n and_o present_n he_o before_o the_o lord_n without_o spot_n or_o wrinkle_n or_o any_o such_o thing_n sin_n indeed_o accompani_v the_o ungodly_a into_o another_o world_n he_o rest_v from_o his_o pleasure_n and_o his_o wicked_a work_n follow_v he_o but_o it_o be_v far_o otherwise_o with_o the_o godly_a sin_n be_v his_o burden_n and_o death_n shall_v unload_v â—im_a sin_n shall_v be_v confine_v to_o hell_n heaven_n entertain_v no_o such_o deformity_n this_o tyrant_n shall_v no_o more_o enslave_v any_o of_o christ_n subject_n the_o house_n of_o saul_n and_o the_o house_n of_o david_n shall_v no_o long_o contend_v that_o bloody_a conflict_n between_o the_o flesh_n and_o spirit_n shall_v then_o be_v determine_v by_o a_o final_a victory_n than_o the_o soul_n will_v say_v farewell_n my_o hard_a heart_n farewell_n unbelief_n farewell_n ingratitude_n then_o thou_o shall_v never_o entertain_v a_o unkind_a thought_n of_o god_n more_o the_o lame_a and_o the_o blind_a and_o the_o jebusite_n shall_v be_v smite_v when_o king_n david_n come_v to_o make_v his_o palace_n in_o zion_n thy_o sin_n must_v die_v when_o the_o lord_n come_v to_o take_v the_o full_a possession_n of_o this_o fort_n royal_a confession_n of_o sin_n shall_v short_o be_v needless_a no_o darkness_n shall_v cloud_v the_o understanding_n no_o perverseness_n the_o will_n no_o disorderliness_n in_o the_o affection_n no_o treachery_n in_o the_o memory_n the_o eye_n shall_v be_v better_o employ_v than_o in_o behold_v of_o vanity_n the_o ear_n shall_v not_o be_v lock_v against_o truth_n the_o hand_n far_o from_o violence_n the_o tongue_n from_o deceit_n and_o the_o foot_n from_o walk_v in_o way_n of_o wickedness_n and_o seem_v this_o a_o light_a matter_n to_o you_o who_o have_v go_v bow_v all_o your_o day_n under_o the_o pressure_n of_o sin_n be_v it_o nothing_o to_o you_o to_o have_v all_o your_o iniquity_n do_v away_o as_o a_o cloud_n and_o your_o transgression_n as_o a_o thick_a cloud_n thus_o see_v what_o a_o kindness_n that_o formidable_a enemy_n do_v to_o all_o the_o subject_n of_o christ_n kingdom_n what_o prayer_n tear_n and_o groan_n do_v gradual_o it_o do_v at_o one_o blow_n thus_o the_o oppress_a be_v deliver_v the_o mourner_n make_v to_o rejoice_v and_o the_o great_a makebate_n between_o god_n and_o the_o soul_n for_o ever_o discard_v and_o turn_v out_o of_o door_n eph._n 5.27_o es_fw-ge 44.22_o 2._o when_o a_o christian_a ayâ—th_n he_o shall_v be_v free_v from_o all_o the_o temptation_n of_o satan_n death_n set_v the_o soul_n out_o of_o the_o devil_n reach_v this_o angel_n have_v nothing_o to_o do_v in_o heaven_n this_o serpent_n shall_v not_o come_v into_o the_o high_a paradise_n nor_o satan_n creep_v into_o this_o eden_n now_o indeed_o he_o go_v up_o and_o down_o like_o a_o roar_a lion_n seek_v who_o he_o may_v devour_v now_o he_o set_v he_o begin_v every_o where_o to_o catch_v the_o unwary_a christian_a he_o use_v his_o stratagem_n to_o surprise_v they_o but_o then_o this_o adversary_n shall_v be_v tread_v under_o foot_n his_o fiery_a dart_n shall_v be_v quench_v and_o his_o design_n break_v o_o happy_a day_n when_o will_v it_o come_v when_o the_o devil_n shall_v be_v as_o unlikely_a to_o tempt_v as_o our_o heart_n to_o close_v when_o we_o be_v get_v once_o safe_a to_o rest_v the_o devil_n shall_v as_o easy_o shake_v god_n throne_n as_o our_o happiness_n death_n turn_v the_o key_n bolt_n and_o bar_n this_o enemy_n out_o then_o o_o then_o thou_o shall_v see_v this_o pharaoh_n cast_v dead_a on_o the_o shore_n and_o for_o ever_o disable_v from_o make_v any_o resistance_n against_o thou_o or_o in_o the_o least_o disturb_v thy_o peace_n rev._n 20.10_o 3._o the_o blessedness_n of_o the_o people_n of_o god_n consist_v in_o their_o be_v free_v from_o the_o frown_n and_o flattery_n of_o the_o world_n in_o life_n time_n thou_o be_v fain_o to_o fight_v thy_o way_n to_o peace_n to_o dispute_v every_o step_n thou_o go_v and_o can_v never_o have_v a_o quiet_a hour_n while_o thou_o have_v such_o ill_a neighbour_n there_o be_v a_o old_a quarrel_n between_o the_o seed_n of_o the_o woman_n and_o the_o serpent_n and_o the_o enmity_n be_v radicate_v and_o the_o â—end_n can_v be_v cool_v with_o nothing_o but_o death_n christian_n expect_v not_o as_o long_o as_o any_o of_o that_o cainisâ—_n generation_n breath_n that_o thou_o shall_v be_v long_o â—â—cure_a in_o the_o world_n you_o shall_v have_v tribulation_n â—ut_v be_v of_o good_a cheer_n christ_n have_v overcome_v the_o world_n joh._n 16.33_o what_o though_o they_o speak_v â—â—eat_a word_n prison_n halter_n faggot_n thou_o shall_v â—e_v long_o ride_v in_o state_n to_o glory_n and_o then_o let_v they_o 〈◊〉_d their_o worst_a when_o thou_o be_v in_o heaven_n they_o â—ay_v curse_v and_o increase_v their_o own_o misery_n but_o â—â—ey_n shall_v not_o in_o the_o least_o diminish_v thy_o tranquillity_n use_v as_o for_o their_o flattery_n they_o shall_v signify_v nothing_o thing_n the_o beauty_n of_o this_o inseriour_a world_n will_v be_v darken_v by_o the_o brightness_n of_o that_o light_n which_o death_n lead_v thou_o into_o its_o excellency_n will_v be_v quite_o eclipse_v its_o allurement_n will_v lose_v their_o power_n who_o can_v choose_v but_o contemn_v the_o earth_n that_o know_v what_o heaven_n mean_v o_o how_o low_o a_o esteem_n have_v the_o most_o experience_a man_n here_o oâ—_n the_o world_n honour_n and_o riches_n be_v account_v very_o inconsiderable_a thing_n to_o they_o which_o understand_v the_o difference_n between_o finite_a and_o infinite_a the_o disproportion_n between_o time_n and_o eternity_n death_n blow_v the_o dust_n out_o of_o our_o eye_n it_o pluckâ—_n off_o the_o veil_n and_o show_v one_o quick_o the_o glory_n oâ—_n both_o world_n and_o so_o it_o be_v not_o lest_o long_o to_o determine_v which_o be_v to_o be_v prefer_v dross_n or_o silver_n brass_n or_o gold_n a_o dunghill_n or_o a_o palace_n there_o wiâ—â—_n be_v no_o thought_n of_o return_v to_o egypt_n or_o gosheâ—_n either_o in_o they_o which_o know_v the_o fruitfulness_n of_o thâ—_n spiritual_a canaan_n the_o accommodation_n of_o the_o neâ—_n jerusalem_n the_o pleasure_n of_o the_o holy_a court_n 4._o at_o death_n he_o shall_v rest_v from_o all_o his_o pain_n there_o be_v no_o fear_n of_o sickness_n sorrow_n and_o achâ—â—â—_n the_o stone_n gout_n and_o plague_n be_v distemper_n thâ—â—_n none_o labour_v with_o there_o that_o air_n be_v clear_a anâ—_n sin_n which_o infect_v other_o place_n never_o get_v foot_v there_o they_o that_o scarce_o know_v what_o a_o dayâ—â—_n ease_v now_o mean_n shall_v then_o forget_v their_o sorrow_n their_o constitution_n shall_v be_v mend_v their_o
be_v in_o a_o ecstasy_n of_o comfort_n and_o feel_v what_o those_o joy_n unspeakable_a in_o believe_v mean_v in_o former_a time_n he_o have_v great_a manifestation_n of_o god_n love_n but_o never_o any_o break_v into_o his_o soul_n with_o such_o power_n and_o clear_a evidence_n as_o then_o he_o have_v as_o it_o be_v a_o prospect_n of_o glory_n and_o some_o foretaste_n of_o that_o happiness_n that_o be_v prepare_v for_o he_o before_o the_o foundation_n of_o the_o world_n and_o o_o how_o do_v his_o heart_n even_o leap_v within_o he_o to_o think_v that_o within_o a_o little_a while_o he_o shall_v full_o and_o eternal_o enjoy_v what_o he_o now_o have_v a_o little_a glimpse_n of_o upon_o monday_n i_o go_v to_o visit_v he_o and_o find_v he_o in_o a_o very_a sweet_a frame_n so_o take_v up_o with_o heaven_n that_o he_o do_v even_o wonder_n at_o himself_o i_o be_o say_v he_o so_o overcome_v with_o the_o love_n of_o christ_n and_o the_o glory_n of_o heaven_n that_o all_o manner_n of_o fear_n be_v hide_v from_o my_o eye_n and_o i_o can_v so_o much_o as_o think_v of_o hell_n or_o if_o i_o do_v it_o be_v with_o joy_n that_o there_o be_v no_o condemnation_n to_o they_o which_o be_v in_o christ_n jesus_n but_o what_o do_v you_o think_v of_o these_o thing_n be_v it_o possible_a that_o they_o shall_v be_v delusion_n o_o sir_n i_o beseech_v you_o be_v faithful_a to_o my_o soul_n and_o tell_v i_o as_o you_o will_v answer_v it_o at_o the_o bar_n of_o god_n what_o you_o judge_v of_o my_o state_n i_o will_v not_o for_o a_o world_n be_v now_o in_o a_o fool_n paradise_n and_o then_o he_o tell_v i_o his_o experience_n and_o entreat_v i_o to_o search_v and_o try_v he_o and_o again_o and_o again_o he_o express_v his_o great_a joy_n under_o the_o apprehension_n of_o death_n and_o that_o glorious_a eternity_n that_o he_o be_v pass_v into_o i_o desire_v earnest_o to_o discourse_v with_o you_o say_v he_o because_o i_o expect_v to_o lose_v the_o use_n of_o my_o reason_n and_o be_o not_o like_a to_o be_v capable_a of_o speak_v my_o mind_n to_o you_o hereafter_o and_o then_o he_o entreat_v i_o to_o give_v he_o a_o funeral_n sermon_n and_o all_o this_o he_o speak_v with_o as_o much_o cheerfulness_n as_o can_v well_o be_v imagine_v speak_v of_o death_n as_o the_o most_o desirable_a thing_n o_o say_v he_o that_o i_o be_v but_o ten_o time_n sick_a i_o long_o to_o die_v i_o be_o ill_a but_o i_o will_v be_v ill_a to_o purpose_n o_o dear_a jesus_n i_o long_o to_o be_v with_o thou_o upon_o tuesday_n his_o distemper_n grow_v much_o upon_o he_o and_o begin_v a_o little_a at_o time_n to_o impair_v his_o intellectual_n and_o yet_o by_o fit_n he_o will_v speak_v excellent_o of_o the_o thing_n of_o god_n be_v ask_v whether_o he_o be_v willing_a to_o die_v he_o answer_v that_o eternity_n be_v too_o little_a for_o he_o to_o praise_n god_n in_o for_o his_o rich_a mercy_n to_o such_o a_o poor_a creature_n as_o he_o be_v that_o the_o lord_n shall_v prepare_v such_o a_o inheritance_n among_o the_o saint_n in_o glory_n for_o he_o and_o that_o his_o life_n be_v hide_v with_o christ_n and_o that_o when_o christ_n who_o be_v his_o life_n shall_v appear_v he_o also_o shall_v appear_v with_o he_o in_o glory_n this_o morning_n he_o pray_v for_o a_o exhort_v those_o that_o be_v in_o the_o family_n to_o prepare_v to_o meet_v he_o in_o glory_n upon_o wednesday_n when_o he_o have_v any_o intermission_n he_o break_v out_o into_o such_o expression_n as_o these_o dear_a jesus_n what_o be_v thou_o do_v prepare_v mansion_n for_o i_o i_o be_o come_v sweet_a jesus_n i_o be_o come_v it_o be_v but_o a_o little_a while_n a_o little_a thread_n and_o when_o that_o be_v cut_v i_o shall_v be_v safe_a in_o glory_n be_v very_o ill_o he_o say_v what_o if_o i_o shall_v live_v two_o hour_n or_o two_o day_n what_o be_v that_o to_o a_o glorious_a eternity_n death_n what_o be_v it_o but_o a_o porter_n to_o open_a heaven-gate_n for_o i_o what_o be_v all_o the_o world_n compare_v to_o that_o crown_n which_o i_o shall_v receive_v be_v ask_v how_o he_o do_v he_o answer_v very_o well_o one_o stand_v by_o say_v no_o you_o be_v very_o ill_a he_o reply_v i_o know_v i_o be_o very_o sick_a but_o i_o say_v i_o be_o well_o because_o i_o be_o as_o god_n will_v have_v i_o be_v when_o i_o come_v to_o he_o in_o the_o afternoon_n i_o find_v he_o exceed_o ill_n and_o betray_v some_o weakness_n in_o his_o intellectual_n and_o his_o discourse_n be_v very_o impertinent_a i_o say_v to_o he_o your_o language_n be_v wont_a to_o be_v spiritual_a but_o now_o you_o forget_v yourself_o it_o be_v true_a sir_n say_v he_o but_o you_o know_v what_o the_o condition_n of_o my_o body_n now_o be_v bless_a be_v god_n the_o root_n of_o matter_n be_v in_o i_o after_o this_o he_o be_v very_o still_o and_o quiet_a while_o i_o read_v to_o he_o and_o seem_v to_o be_v much_o please_v at_o the_o read_n of_o the_o fifty_o four_o and_o fifty_o five_o of_o isaiah_n and_o give_v a_o very_a rational_a account_n of_o any_o spiritual_a question_n that_o be_v put_v to_o he_o and_o very_o desirous_a that_o i_o shall_v pray_v with_o he_o upon_o thursday_n because_o of_o extraordinary_a business_n of_o my_o own_o i_o can_v not_o be_v present_a with_o he_o upon_o friday_n he_o be_v take_v speechless_a for_o many_o hour_n together_o but_o according_a to_o our_o prayer_n at_o last_o he_o recover_v the_o use_n of_o his_o reason_n more_o than_o before_o and_o can_v speak_v that_o we_o may_v well_o understand_v he_o then_o i_o ask_v he_o how_o he_o do_v he_o answer_v i_o still_o alive_a after_o a_o considerable_a pause_n he_o cry_v out_o gracious_a father_n thy_o will_n be_v do_v then_o i_o open_v several_a scripture_n to_o he_o which_o speak_v the_o bless_a state_n of_o saint_n in_o another_o world_n and_o when_o i_o ask_v he_o whether_o he_o do_v understand_v i_o he_o answer_v yes_o yes_o and_o weep_v several_a time_n for_o joy_n now_o the_o symptom_n of_o death_n approach_v come_v upon_o he_o scarce_o any_o pulse_n and_o a_o die_a sweat_n and_o the_o last_o word_n that_o i_o hear_v he_o speak_v be_v glory_n glory_n after_o that_o he_o continue_v in_o very_o great_a agony_n and_o his_o pang_n be_v strong_a till_o about_o 11_o of_o the_o clock_n than_o he_o sleep_v in_o jesus_n be_v exceed_o lament_v by_o the_o young_a man_n of_o his_o society_n many_o of_o which_o be_v about_o he_o finis_fw-la a_o account_n of_o god_n deal_n with_o this_o young_a man_n before_z and_o at_o his_o conversion_n with_o some_o remark_n upon_o the_o same_o as_o it_o be_v deliver_v to_o i_o under_o his_o own_o hand_n after_o i_o have_v discourse_v with_o he_o by_o way_n of_o dialogue_n between_o a_o minister_n and_o himself_o minister_n what_o ought_v to_o be_v the_o great_a care_n and_o duty_n of_o every_o profess_v christian_a in_o these_o our_o day_n convert_n pray_v what_o may_v be_v the_o reason_n of_o this_o your_o question_n min._n i_o have_v very_o many_o reason_n but_o one_o be_v this_o because_o it_o be_v daily_o see_v that_o very_o many_o who_o have_v make_v great_a profession_n of_o religion_n and_o be_v account_v among_o the_o wise_a virgin_n fall_v away_o which_o be_v very_o sad_a to_o conâ—ider_v and_o i_o fear_v that_o the_o reason_n be_v because_o there_o be_v not_o that_o care_n take_v about_o the_o state_n of_o their_o soul_n which_o there_o ought_v to_o be_v now_o i_o pray_v you_o answer_v i_o my_o question_n viz._n what_o ought_v etc._n etc._n conu._n with_o respect_n to_o the_o former_a it_o ought_v to_o be_v every_o christian_n great_a care_n to_o examine_v himself_o whether_o he_o be_v in_o the_o state_n of_o grace_n or_o no_o and_o which_o way_n the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o bring_v he_o into_o that_o bless_a condition_n since_o it_o be_v to_o be_v fear_v the_o want_n of_o this_o be_v the_o great_a and_o chief_a cause_n of_o man_n apostasy_n from_o religion_n for_o have_v he_o ever_o be_v true_o wrought_v upon_o by_o the_o spirit_n of_o god_n have_v his_o conviction_n which_o more_o or_o less_o all_o have_v have_v turn_v to_o a_o true_a conversion_n and_o have_v his_o pang_n of_o sorrow_n for_o sin_n but_o bring_v forth_o regeneration_n then_o sure_o he_o will_v have_v be_v in_o such_o a_o estate_n from_o which_o all_o the_o malice_n of_o the_o power_n of_o darkness_n can_v not_o have_v draw_v he_o min._n the_o answer_n do_v somewhat_o savour_n of_o goodness_n and_o that_o you_o understand_v with_o your_o heart_n what_o you_o express_v with_o the_o tongue_n conversion_n or_o regeneration_n be_v a_o mighty_a work_n and_o on_o whosoever_o it_o be_v true_o wrought_v
my_o heart_n at_o that_o time_n be_v so_o desperate_o wicked_a that_o doubtless_o have_v not_o a_o almighty_a power_n pity_v i_o i_o shall_v even_o have_v pawn_v my_o soul_n for_o the_o obtain_n of_o what_o i_o then_o desire_v then_o in_o a_o passion_n i_o make_v a_o presumptuous_a vow_n that_o i_o will_v leave_v off_o that_o sport_n for_o one_o year_n this_o be_v about_o november_n or_o december_n which_o for_o a_o little_a time_n i_o keep_v and_o now_o observe_v the_o great_a subtlety_n of_o the_o devil_n in_o this_o particular_a for_o no_o soon_o be_v it_o the_o first_o day_n of_o january_n but_o present_o i_o be_v tell_v that_o my_o vow_n be_v out_o of_o date_n and_o that_o it_o signify_v nothing_o and_o they_o be_v my_o carnal_a friend_n that_o tell_v i_o i_o be_v willing_a to_o make_v my_o conscience_n submit_v so_o that_o i_o soon_o embrace_v my_o old_a sport_n again_o and_o do_v plain_o lay_v myself_o open_a to_o the_o wrath_n of_o god_n for_o such_o a_o great_a sin_n yet_o i_o can_v not_o so_o much_o charm_v my_o conscience_n but_o it_o will_v often_o accuse_v i_o for_o it_o but_o it_o be_v not_o many_o week_n after_o but_o i_o engage_v as_o deep_o in_o the_o same_o sin_n of_o game_n as_o before_o and_o now_o hear_v and_o admire_v for_o even_o now_o will_v appear_v such_o love_n as_o never_o any_o be_v ever_o sensible_a of_o but_o such_o as_o have_v feel_v it_o have_v be_v at_o the_o lose_a hand_n the_o season_n of_o the_o night_n call_v i_o away_o i_o leave_v off_o but_o much_o trouble_v and_o about_o five_o in_o the_o morning_n i_o awaken_v and_o then_o there_o be_v a_o pleasant_a lightness_n upon_o my_o spirit_n as_o if_o it_o have_v be_v refresh_v after_o great_a trouble_n what_o this_o mean_v i_o can_v not_o tell_v yet_o can_v not_o but_o take_v special_a notice_n of_o it_o that_o i_o who_o go_v to_o bed_n much_o dissatisfy_v and_o perplex_v shall_v when_o i_o awake_v seem_v to_o be_v so_o much_o comfort_v and_o my_o sleep_n for_o a_o little_a time_n depart_v from_o i_o and_o certain_o i_o have_v some_o deep_a thought_n which_o now_o i_o can_v remember_v but_o the_o result_n of_o they_o come_v to_o this_o i_o do_v then_o engage_v myself_o by_o a_o fresh_a vow_n that_o the_o next_o morning_n i_o will_v play_v so_o as_o to_o venture_v about_o two_o shilling_n and_o if_o i_o lose_v that_o than_o not_o to_o play_v any_o more_o for_o such_o a_o certain_a time_n and_o to_o my_o best_a remembrance_n for_o as_o i_o will_v not_o add_v so_o i_o will_v not_o diminish_v and_o so_o rob_v god_n of_o his_o glory_n and_o my_o poor_a soul_n of_o comfort_n i_o do_v at_o that_o time_n lift_v up_o my_o heart_n to_o god_n but_o with_o what_o affection_n i_o can_v tell_v i_o hope_v not_o without_o great_a shame_n to_o crave_v his_o aid_n that_o i_o may_v be_v enable_v to_o keep_v my_o great_a vow_n and_o so_o when_o the_o time_n come_v that_o i_o be_v to_o venture_v my_o money_n which_o i_o think_v very_o long_o with_o great_a cheerfulness_n i_o go_v to_o play_v be_v very_o willing_a and_o i_o think_v desirous_a to_o lose_v which_o be_v soon_o accomplish_v according_a to_o my_o hope_n which_o when_o it_o be_v end_v i_o can_v say_v what_o i_o think_v or_o how_o my_o heart_n work_v but_o as_o i_o think_v that_o very_a day_n my_o heart_n be_v somewhat_o trouble_v by_o what_o follow_v for_o i_o have_v lose_v a_o great_a part_n of_o that_o in_o which_o my_o heart_n so_o much_o delight_v and_o idolise_v as_o its_o god_n and_o rest_v in_o as_o its_o ultimate_a end_n i_o can_v not_o find_v rest_n in_o it_o as_o former_o and_o so_o be_v much_o trouble_v i_o go_v to_o peruse_v some_o toy_n that_o i_o have_v by_o i_o and_o among_o they_o there_o be_v one_o jewel_n which_o the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o put_v into_o my_o hand_n which_o be_v a_o book_n entitle_v the_o crumb_n of_o comfort_n the_o which_o when_o i_o feel_v my_o heart_n somewhat_o incline_v to_o peruse_v i_o be_v much_o perplex_v within_o myself_o and_o can_v not_o but_o wonder_v what_o manner_n of_o salutation_n this_o shall_v be_v and_o now_o i_o hope_v i_o have_v great_a cause_n to_o acknowledge_v that_o the_o hand_n of_o god_n be_v in_o all_o this_o but_o i_o will_v not_o on_o this_o account_n any_o way_n turn_v aside_o but_o go_v on_o as_o my_o own_o heart_n and_o conscience_n now_o witness_v to_o i_o and_o i_o hope_v the_o spirit_n of_o god_n likewise_o and_o so_o very_o desirous_a i_o be_v to_o know_v the_o meaning_n of_o this_o dark_a providence_n as_o than_o it_o appear_v to_o i_o to_o be_v that_o more_o or_o less_o for_o two_o day_n together_o i_o often_o peruse_v more_o of_o the_o book_n but_o my_o heart_n be_v little_o affect_v to_o any_o particular_a thing_n and_o yet_o i_o be_v trouble_v more_o and_o more_o within_o i_o and_o can_v find_v no_o rest_n for_o my_o poor_a soul_n and_o in_o less_o than_o a_o week_n time_n i_o think_v about_o the_o end_n of_o two_o or_o three_o day_n the_o more_o i_o read_v i_o begin_v to_o have_v more_o deep_a thought_n and_o heart_n amaze_a consideration_n which_o begin_v to_o make_v i_o exceed_o trouble_v and_o much_o cast_v down_o about_o the_o state_n and_o condition_n of_o my_o poor_a captive_a soul_n which_o as_o i_o tell_v you_o before_o be_v almost_o sink_v into_o the_o bottom_n of_o the_o bottomless_a sea_n of_o god_n wrath_n from_o which_o there_o be_v no_o redemption_n with_o the_o weight_n of_o its_o insupportable_a sin_n and_o now_o what_o the_o chief_a act_n of_o my_o soul_n be_v i_o can_v tell_v but_o sure_o i_o be_o that_o my_o trouble_n do_v increase_v yet_o more_o and_o more_o and_o i_o hope_v it_o be_v for_o my_o sin_n for_o i_o do_v well_o remember_v that_o within_o very_a few_o day_n or_o rather_o hour_n after_o the_o sense_n of_o my_o sin_n come_v into_o my_o mind_n and_o the_o sight_n of_o they_o be_v so_o clear_a and_o the_o number_n of_o they_o so_o numberless_a and_o their_o aggravation_n so_o weighty_a and_o the_o nature_n of_o they_o so_o detestable_a that_o what_o i_o then_o feel_v i_o can_v now_o possible_o declare_v oh_o where_o be_v i_o certain_o have_v i_o be_v surprise_v with_o the_o great_a enemy_n in_o the_o world_n and_o my_o life_n in_o the_o great_a danger_n i_o can_v not_o have_v be_v more_o trouble_v and_o have_v i_o be_v afflict_v with_o all_o the_o torture_n that_o man_n can_v have_v devise_v i_o shall_v not_o have_v be_v more_o torment_v nay_o i_o think_v if_o my_o deceitful_a heart_n do_v not_o deceive_v i_o that_o have_v i_o be_v in_o hell_n among_o those_o infernal_a fiend_n and_o have_v hear_v the_o yell_n and_o howl_n of_o those_o damn_a wretch_n i_o think_v i_o can_v not_o have_v be_v much_o more_o affright_a for_o than_o i_o do_v look_v upon_o my_o soul_n to_o be_v within_o a_o hair_n breadth_n of_o eternal_a misery_n and_o oh_o the_o condition_n i_o see_v myself_o then_o in_o be_v unutterable_a have_v there_o not_o be_v a_o everlasting_a arm_n of_o power_n and_o mercy_n underneath_o i_o shall_v undoubted_o have_v follow_v the_o step_n of_o cain_n or_o judas_n but_o o_o bless_a and_o admire_v be_v free_a grace_n and_o why_o i_o lord_n why_o i_o oh_o love_n love_n love_n even_o love_v unspeakable_a yea_o love_n unutterable_a and_o further_o in_o this_o my_o trouble_n the_o lord_n be_v so_o far_o please_v to_o pity_n and_o show_v mercy_n to_o my_o poor_a soul_n that_o my_o soul_n have_v not_o very_o long_o labour_v under_o this_o insupportable_a burden_n of_o her_o great_a and_o mighty_a sin_n but_o i_o perceive_v a_o door_n of_o hope_n as_o it_o be_v unlatch_v and_o somewhat_o open_a and_o that_o if_o i_o will_v but_o in_o good_a earnest_n turn_v to_o god_n that_o yet_o it_o be_v not_o too_o late_o and_o that_o there_o be_v hope_n in_o israel_n concern_v this_o thing_n which_o consideration_n do_v not_o a_o little_a comfort_n my_o poor_a soul_n and_o then_o further_o it_o please_v the_o lord_n to_o open_v my_o heart_n to_o visit_v one_o who_o i_o think_v may_v do_v i_o much_o good_a and_o i_o judge_v he_o fit_a to_o be_v acquaint_v with_o my_o condition_n in_o that_o i_o hope_v he_o fear_v the_o lord_n and_o by_o the_o way_n let_v i_o tell_v you_o that_o i_o do_v at_o that_o time_n unspeakable_o love_v all_o such_o even_o more_o than_o my_o own_o relation_n with_o humility_n let_v it_o be_v speak_v and_o when_o i_o be_v with_o he_o he_o joyful_o receive_v i_o and_o declare_v unto_o i_o many_o comfortable_a thing_n which_o through_o grace_n do_v not_o a_o little_a raise_v my_o deject_a spirit_n and_o he_o then_o lend_v i_o
you_o that_o for_o a_o little_a time_n about_o a_o month_n or_o two_o i_o be_v little_o satisfy_v no_o long_o than_o i_o be_v engage_v in_o such_o work_n as_o read_v hear_v deep_a meditation_n but_o especial_o prayer_n and_o these_o oh_o these_o be_v the_o physician_n that_o i_o look_v upon_o so_o much_o to_o work_v so_o great_a a_o cure_n upon_o my_o soul_n that_o none_o but_o christ_n that_o great_a physician_n can_v do_v and_o true_o the_o best_a of_o the_o physician_n be_v so_o full_a of_o ill_a humour_n themselves_o as_o pride_n self-confidence_n etc._n etc._n that_o without_o the_o physic_n of_o christ_n blood_n to_o purge_v and_o purify_v they_o they_o will_v have_v stink_v in_o the_o nostril_n of_o a_o holy_a and_o pure_a god_n as_o i_o be_o afraid_a they_o often_o do_v min._n now_o you_o have_v give_v in_o a_o account_n about_o sin_n i_o will_v glad_o hear_v what_o account_v you_o can_v give_v about_o the_o way_n of_o holiness_n and_o of_o grace_n and_o how_o you_o begin_v to_o make_v your_o progress_n in_o this_o road_n conu._n i_o must_v be_v but_o very_o brief_a here_o for_o i_o have_v much_o to_o say_v about_o other_o thing_n but_o i_o shall_v as_o the_o lord_n shall_v enable_v i_o satisfy_v you_o in_o this_o as_o i_o tell_v you_o before_o when_o the_o burden_n of_o my_o sin_n first_o come_v upon_o i_o that_o then_o and_o likewise_o in_o the_o six_o year_n of_o my_o conviction_n i_o be_v full_o convince_v of_o the_o necessity_n of_o live_v a_o holy_a life_n and_o of_o the_o beauty_n of_o holiness_n and_o that_o without_o it_o there_o will_v be_v no_o salvation_n for_o without_o holiness_n none_o shall_v see_v the_o lord_n and_o upon_o this_o account_n i_o also_o earnest_o beseech_v the_o lord_n by_o prayer_n and_o hear_v and_o read_v good_a book_n which_o the_o lord_n do_v mighty_o incline_v my_o heart_n to_o do_v and_o so_o every_o day_n i_o do_v more_o and_o more_o desire_n holiness_n and_o do_v earnest_o thirst_v after_o the_o image_n of_o god_n to_o be_v renew_v upon_o my_o heart_n so_o that_o in_o short_a i_o find_v no_o rest_n any_o way_n but_o what_o i_o get_v by_o live_v holy_o and_o abstain_v from_o sin_n and_o as_o my_o weak_a physician_n i_o mean_v my_o prayer_n hear_v read_v meditation_n vow_n resolution_n etc._n etc._n i_o say_v as_o these_o be_v able_a to_o apply_v comfort_n to_o i_o so_o i_o have_v it_o and_o no_o long_o be_v ignorant_a of_o the_o life_n of_o faith_n in_o christ_n and_o true_o they_o prove_v very_o bad_a comforter_n and_o as_o i_o tell_v you_o they_o want_v christ_n blood_n to_o procure_v acceptation_n in_o the_o eye_n of_o a_o pure_a and_o holy_a god_n which_o will_v regard_v they_o with_o favour_n no_o otherwise_o than_o as_o they_o be_v present_v to_o he_o sprinkle_v with_o the_o blood_n of_o his_o son_n min._n methinks_v you_o seem_v to_o speak_v much_o against_o these_o duty_n and_o against_o holiness_n as_o if_o they_o be_v not_o altogether_o necessary_a to_o be_v embrace_v do_v you_o not_o conu._n oh_o no_o god_n forbid_v i_o hope_v i_o shall_v never_o so_o far_o speak_v against_o they_o as_o to_o neglect_v they_o in_o the_o least_o but_o this_o i_o have_v say_v that_o i_o may_v not_o look_v upon_o they_o any_o further_a than_o as_o they_o lead_v i_o to_o christ_n for_o true_o i_o have_v find_v nothing_o in_o the_o world_n so_o much_o hinder_v i_o of_o comfort_n wilful_a sin_n only_o except_v as_o in_o lay_v so_o great_a a_o stress_n upon_o duty_n for_o certain_o have_v i_o lay_v my_o foundation_n sure_a upon_o the_o rock_n of_o christ_n and_o not_o all_o upon_o my_o own_o righteousness_n i_o shall_v never_o have_v be_v so_o much_o shake_v and_o as_o i_o may_v say_v almost_o overturn_v with_o the_o assault_n of_o sin_n and_o satan_n but_o he_o will_v have_v uphold_v i_o with_o his_o everlasting_a arm_n that_o i_o shall_v have_v be_v able_a long_o ago_o to_o have_v triumph_v in_o his_o merit_n over_o all_o the_o assault_n that_o satan_n and_o my_o own_o heart_n make_v against_o i_o min._n how_o long_o do_v you_o live_v upon_o the_o stock_n of_o your_o duty_n before_o the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o let_v you_o see_v your_o error_n and_o how_o be_v your_o condition_n all_o this_o while_n as_o you_o think_v yourself_o conu._n i_o live_v so_o about_o three_o year_n or_o more_o and_o in_o that_o time_n i_o have_v some_o sad_a declining_n indeed_o every_o day_n almost_o i_o lose_v my_o god_n and_o the_o evidence_n of_o his_o love_n so_o as_o i_o think_v myself_o happy_a long_o than_o when_o i_o can_v perform_v duty_n with_o great_a zeal_n and_o with_o strong_a affection_n and_o then_o oftentimes_o i_o can_v have_v be_v willing_a to_o have_v dye_v as_o i_o think_v my_o heart_n do_v so_o rejoice_v in_o they_o but_o when_o my_o heart_n be_v somewhat_o dead_a and_o flat_a than_o i_o be_v at_o a_o great_a loss_n and_o can_v find_v out_o no_o rest_n for_o the_o sole_a of_o my_o foot_n min._n this_o which_o you_o have_v say_v seem_v to_o i_o to_o be_v a_o little_a strange_a why_o where_o be_v your_o faith_n all_o this_o while_n you_o tell_v i_o before_o that_o you_o dare_v not_o look_v to_o god_n but_o through_o christ_n and_o you_o seem_v then_o as_o you_o go_v along_o to_o make_v christ_n your_o hope_n and_o saviour_n and_o then_o how_o do_v you_o mean_v you_o do_v not_o rest_n in_o he_o conu._n this_o be_v somewhat_o hard_a to_o answer_v but_o i_o hope_v you_o will_v pardon_v my_o weakness_n and_o i_o will_v tell_v you_o as_o plain_a as_o i_o can_v and_o that_o only_o as_o my_o heart_n and_o conscience_n witness_v and_o not_o to_o take_v the_o help_n of_o any_o book_n to_o open_v it_o to_o i_o that_o so_o i_o may_v with_o more_o humble_a confidence_n say_v that_o these_o thing_n i_o have_v seâ—_n down_o no_o otherwise_o but_o as_o my_o own_o spiriâ—_n by_o the_o assistance_n of_o god_n spirit_n dictate_v to_o i_o and_o now_o i_o will_v tell_v you_o what_o i_o mean_v by_o what_o i_o have_v say_v i_o hope_v i_o look_v upon_o christ_n to_o be_v a_o complete_a saviour_n in_o every_o respect_n and_o i_o see_v my_o great_a need_n of_o his_o blood_n to_o procure_v my_o pardon_n for_o my_o sin_n and_o i_o know_v that_o it_o be_v only_o from_o his_o grace_n that_o i_o be_v in_o any_o measure_n sanctify_v and_o by_o this_o i_o hope_v i_o lay_v all_o my_o sin_n upon_o he_o and_o dare_v not_o in_o the_o least_o think_v of_o answer_v for_o they_o myself_o before_o god_n and_o seem_v to_o give_v he_o the_o glory_n in_o respect_n to_o any_o work_n of_o holiness_n in_o my_o heart_n and_o so_o i_o do_v high_o prize_v he_o and_o great_o delight_v in_o he_o and_o earnest_o desire_v to_o love_v he_o and_o more_o and_o more_o to_o serve_v he_o and_o so_o i_o act_v faith_n for_o three_o year_n but_o all_o this_o while_n i_o be_v not_o thorough_o convince_v of_o the_o insufficiency_n of_o my_o own_o righteousness_n so_o as_o to_o lay_v that_o at_o christ_n foot_n neither_o can_v i_o suppose_v it_o that_o one_o may_v be_v â—â—â—â—â—bâ—d_v by_o another_o righteousness_n but_o 〈…〉_o that_o because_o i_o be_v not_o altogether_o 〈…〉_o as_o other_o as_o i_o think_v there_o 〈…〉_o â—â—ould_v fare_v better_o than_o other_o and_z 〈…〉_o mix_v my_o own_o merit_n with_o christ_n 〈◊〉_d never_o come_v â—o_o far_o out_o of_o myself_o as_o to_o cast_v my_o righteousness_n as_o well_o as_o my_o sin_n at_o his_o sit_fw-mi and_o now_o what_o abundant_a cause_n have_v i_o to_o be_v humble_v and_o to_o lie_v very_o low_a before_o god_n and_o still_o more_o and_o more_o to_o admire_v the_o infinite_a mercy_n and_o patience_n of_o god_n oh_o that_o i_o who_o after_o i_o be_v much_o enlighten_v and_o have_v abundant_o taste_v and_o see_v how_o good_a and_o gracious_a the_o lord_n be_v i_o say_v that_o after_o all_o his_o unspeakable_a mercy_n to_o i_o how_o he_o bring_v i_o out_o of_o my_o egyptian_a bondage_n of_o sin_n and_o loosen_v i_o from_o many_o strong_a hold_v of_o satan_n and_o bring_v i_o so_o near_o to_o his_o father_n bosom_n that_o i_o be_v wont_a to_o be_v many_o time_n almost_o ravish_v with_o the_o fore-thought_n of_o that_o joy_n i_o do_v hope_n for_o in_o heaven_n oh_o that_o after_o he_o have_v pass_v i_o over_o the_o red_a sea_n and_o when_o many_o of_o my_o enemy_n be_v dead_a and_o beat_a back_n and_o that_o after_o he_o have_v try_v i_o a_o little_a in_o the_o wilderness_n of_o this_o world_n than_o he_o will_v have_v bring_v i_o safe_a into_o canaan_n oh_o that_o i_o shall_v be_v so_o disingenuous_a as_o to_o set_v up_o a_o calf_n i_o mean_v my_o own_o righteousness_n
defilement_n and_o take_v out_o her_o stain_n and_o have_v deck_v she_o with_o his_o jewel_n and_o put_v on_o her_o wedding_n garment_n that_o day_n be_v come_v o_o my_o soul_n when_o will_v the_o shadow_n flee_v away_o when_o will_v day_n and_o night_n be_v all_o at_o a_o end_n when_o will_v time_n be_v spend_v when_o shall_v the_o curtain_n be_v draw_v o_o that_o that_o be_v the_o place_n thou_o shall_v then_o love_v that_o precious_a jesus_n with_o a_o seraphic_a and_o angel-like_o love_n thou_o will_v then_o as_o much_o delight_n and_o rejoice_v in_o he_o as_o abraham_n david_n and_o paul_n do_v thy_o drowsy_a soul_n shall_v be_v as_o nimble_a and_o active_a in_o the_o service_n of_o thy_o great_a maker_n as_o enoch_n and_o elias_n thou_o shall_v praise_v he_o day_n and_o night_n and_o be_v no_o more_o weary_a than_o the_o angel_n themselves_o thou_o shall_v perfect_o understand_v the_o will_n of_o god_n and_o ready_o obey_v it_o thou_o shall_v be_v holy_a as_o god_n be_v holy_a and_o what_o will_v you_o now_o give_v for_o such_o a_o frame_n how_o glad_a will_v you_o be_v to_o feel_v a_o connaturality_n to_o divine_a employment_n how_o happy_a will_v you_o think_v yourselves_o if_o your_o heart_n be_v always_o as_o god_n will_v have_v it_o be_v it_o not_o for_o this_o that_o you_o fast_o and_o pray_v be_v it_o not_o for_o this_o that_o you_o hear_v read_v and_o meditate_v be_v not_o this_o the_o end_n of_o sacrament_n well_o be_v of_o good_a cheer_n in_o mount_n zion_n there_o shall_v be_v deliverance_n and_o holiness_n obed._n 17._o and_o be_v all_o this_o nothing_o seem_v it_o still_o a_o small_a privilege_n to_o be_v a_o child_n of_o god_n and_o like_o our_o father_n who_o that_o understand_v this_o will_v not_o bid_v death_n welcome_a and_o say_v now_o grave_a do_v thy_o worst_a ask_v paul_n and_o he_o will_v tell_v you_o that_o upon_o this_o account_n he_o groan_v inquire_v of_o david_n and_o he_o will_v let_v you_o understand_v that_o he_o never_o expect_v satisfaction_n till_o he_o awake_a with_o god_n likeness_n psal_n 17._o 3._o another_o thing_n wherein_o the_o blessedness_n of_o a_o christian_a at_o death_n lie_v be_v this_o the_o sight_n of_o christ_n what_o can_v be_v more_o desire_v by_o a_o child_n of_o god_n than_o to_o behold_v and_o enjoy_v he_o by_o who_o all_o the_o mercy_n we_o have_v and_o all_o that_o we_o expect_v slow_a in_o to_o we_o eph._n 1.11_o that_o good_a old_a saint_n luk._n 2.30_o think_v it_o a_o heaven_n upon_o earth_n to_o see_v he_o though_o his_o majesty_n be_v veil_v and_o the_o brightness_n of_o his_o glory_n wrap_v up_o and_o cover_v by_o his_o humanity_n he_o do_v sing_v a_o requiem_n to_o his_o soul_n and_o say_v now_o let_v thy_o servant_n depart_v in_o peace_n for_o my_o eye_n have_v see_v thy_o salvation_n how_o be_v peter_n james_n and_o john_n affect_v at_o his_o transfiguration_n mat._n 17_o 2._o what_o a_o admirable_a frame_n do_v the_o spouse_n seem_v to_o be_v in_o when_o she_o see_v only_o the_o shadow_n and_o backpart_n of_o this_o belove_a one_o cant._n 5.16_o she_o can_v tell_v when_o to_o have_v do_v commend_v of_o he_o but_o all_o this_o be_v but_o a_o small_a thing_n compare_v to_o the_o sight_n which_o they_o shall_v see_v when_o their_o grace_n shall_v be_v complete_a and_o their_o soul_n like_o he_o and_o then_o shall_v they_o behold_v the_o king_n in_o his_o beauty_n no_o long_o the_o contempt_n and_o scorn_n of_o the_o world_n no_o long_o in_o poverty_n and_o want_n no_o long_o crucify_v and_o reject_v but_o jesus_n the_o express_a image_n of_o his_o father_n and_o the_o brightness_n of_o his_o glory_n accompany_v with_o million_o of_o angel_n all_o at_o his_o command_n and_o yet_o for_o all_o this_o cast_v a_o gracious_a eye_n upon_o they_o then_o shall_v the_o soul_n behold_v he_o face_n to_o face_n who_o do_v and_o suffer_v such_o wonderful_a thing_n for_o it_o it_o be_v he_o that_o come_v out_o of_o his_o father_n bosom_n it_o be_v he_o that_o 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and_o oil_n be_v not_o his_o kindness_n to_o be_v value_v above_o life_n itself_o what_o mean_v thou_o then_o o_o my_o soul_n that_o thou_o do_v so_o dread_a his_o come_n why_o be_v thou_o so_o loath_a to_o be_v with_o he_o why_o be_v thou_o afraid_a of_o the_o enjoyment_n of_o he_o will_v thy_o redeemer_n make_v thou_o a_o slave_n have_v heaven_n change_v his_o nature_n and_o make_v he_o less_o desirable_a will_v thy_o saviour_n make_v thou_o miserable_a awake_v then_o o_o you_o saint_n and_o stand_v a_o tiptoe_n wait_v watch_n and_o long_o till_o thou_o see_v he_o who_o alone_o can_v fill_v thy_o soul_n fight_v strive_v and_o run_v till_o you_o enjoy_v one_o smile_n of_o he_o one_o look_n of_o his_o love_n be_v worth_a the_o pleasure_n of_o ten_o world_n where_o be_v thy_o heart_n where_o be_v thy_o desire_n what_o be_v become_v of_o thy_o love_n if_o christ_n do_v not_o affect_v draw_v and_o fire_n thou_o what_o will_n but_o when_o thou_o shall_v see_v christ_n indeed_o his_o very_a look_n will_v so_o warm_v thy_o soul_n that_o thou_o shall_v in_o a_o moment_n feel_v a_o divine_a flame_n which_o shall_v never_o be_v extinguish_v as_o long_o as_o christ_n the_o object_n of_o thy_o love_n shall_v live_v the_o sight_n of_o christ_n will_v put_v new_a life_n into_o thy_o soul_n and_o make_v thy_o love_n and_o joy_n fresh_a for_o ever_o this_o be_v he_o o_o my_o soul_n that_o be_v wound_v that_o thou_o may_v be_v heal_v this_o be_v he_o who_o be_v crown_v with_o thorn_n that_o thou_o may_v be_v crown_v with_o glory_n this_o this_o be_v he_o that_o die_v that_o thou_o may_v live_v be_v not_o all_o the_o glory_n of_o heaven_n wrap_v up_o in_o he_o be_v not_o the_o treasure_n of_o divine_a kindness_n which_o be_v sometime_o hide_v in_o he_o now_o open_v tell_v i_o now_o o_o my_o soul_n be_v there_o any_o in_o two_o world_n comparable_a to_o he_o be_v not_o that_o he_o that_o shelter_v thou_o from_o the_o storm_n of_o god_n wrath_n be_v not_o that_o precious_a body_n the_o 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not_o at_o that_o present_a but_o since_o i_o have_v and_o in_o short_a it_o be_v thus_o a_o little_a while_n after_o my_o last_o discourse_n as_o i_o think_v my_o heart_n be_v draw_v after_o the_o vanity_n of_o this_o world_n more_o than_o ordinary_a and_o at_o the_o time_n i_o liken_v the_o estate_n of_o my_o soul_n to_o the_o condition_n of_o a_o fair_a virgin_n that_o have_v many_o suitor_n but_o one_o she_o will_v love_v and_o choose_v above_o the_o rest_n but_o she_o be_v not_o yet_o marry_v they_o all_o make_v out_o for_o her_o love_n which_o be_v no_o small_a trouble_n to_o she_o and_o do_v somewhat_o make_v she_o doubt_v which_o she_o shall_v have_v but_o so_o soon_o as_o she_o be_v marry_v to_o one_o of_o they_o than_o she_o dare_v not_o think_v of_o entertain_v the_o other_o upon_o that_o account_n even_o so_o i_o look_v upon_o my_o poor_a soul_n and_o that_o if_o she_o be_v but_o solemn_o marry_v to_o christ_n i_o mean_v in_o the_o sacrament_n than_o she_o dare_v not_o so_o 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invite_v to_o so_o great_a a_o banquet_n and_o now_o how_o do_v i_o think_v my_o condition_n unquestionable_a and_o nothing_o trouble_v i_o but_o want_v of_o assurance_n to_o persevere_v and_o although_o the_o doctor_n give_v i_o a_o great_a caution_n to_o lay_v all_o upon_o christ_n and_o not_o any_o thing_n upon_o self_n as_o i_o now_o consider_v but_o yet_o my_o eye_n be_v so_o blind_a and_o my_o heart_n so_o deceitful_a that_o i_o soon_o forget_v it_o and_o so_o i_o prepare_v my_o heart_n as_o well_o as_o i_o can_v and_o so_o address_v myself_o to_o the_o lord_n table_n and_o be_v so_o far_o as_o i_o can_v understand_v make_v more_o welcome_a i_o be_o sure_a than_o i_o deserve_v and_o then_o i_o do_v feel_v the_o lord_n with_o his_o cord_n of_o love_n draw_v hard_o at_o my_o poor_a soul_n and_o so_o i_o exercise_v my_o love_n upon_o christ_n and_o so_o far_o as_o i_o know_v enjoy_v sweet_a communion_n with_o he_o but_o this_o last_v no_o long_o than_o my_o heart_n be_v enlarge_v 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that_o i_o think_v to_o open_v my_o case_n to_o some_o divine_a but_o to_o this_o trouble_n another_o be_v add_v which_o be_v that_o at_o that_o time_n the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o let_v i_o see_v my_o own_o nakedness_n so_o much_o and_o that_o which_o i_o take_v to_o be_v a_o cover_n to_o it_o make_v it_o seem_v to_o be_v much_o more_o naked_a than_o i_o can_v have_v imagine_v it_o to_o be_v that_o then_o i_o think_v the_o more_o i_o pray_v the_o more_o i_o sin_v and_o the_o more_o i_o confess_v and_o repent_v and_o bewail_v my_o own_o wretched_a heart_n especial_o in_o the_o time_n of_o duty_n the_o more_o i_o have_v cause_n to_o do_v so_o still_o and_o now_o i_o look_v upon_o myself_o in_o a_o most_o sad_a and_o destitute_a condition_n for_o how_o can_v i_o choose_v when_o i_o see_v my_o own_o goodness_n depart_v from_o i_o which_o i_o idolise_v as_o the_o rock_n of_o my_o salvation_n and_o when_o i_o see_v such_o a_o numberless_a number_n of_o sin_n come_v afresh_o into_o my_o 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he_o will_v 01_o have_v this_o usurper_n execute_v and_o likewise_o i_o do_v as_o i_o be_v able_a earnest_o beg_v of_o the_o lord_n that_o he_o will_v give_v i_o strength_n to_o resist_v he_o so_o that_o he_o may_v never_o sit_v upon_o his_o throne_n more_o and_o then_o i_o do_v see_v through_o admire_a grace_n the_o want_n of_o christ_n more_o than_o ever_o not_o only_o to_o cover_v