her offence let her wear a velvet hood made just in the fashion of a great Tongue in my conceit 't is a very pritty Embleme of a Woman TAC. My Lord she hath a vild boy to her Page a chief agent in this Treason his name 's Mendacio CON. S. Ha well I will inflict this punishment on him for this time let him be soundly whipt and ever after though he shall strengthen his speeches with the sinews of Truth yet none shall believe him PHA. In my imagination my Lord the Day is dead to the great toe and in my conceit it growes dark by which I conjecture it will be cold and therefore in my fancy and opinion 't is best to repair to our Lodgings Exeunt omnes praeter Anamnestes Appetitus ACT. 5. SCEN. 20. Anamnestes Appetitus a sleep in a corner ANA. What 's this a fellow whispering so closely with the Earth so ho so ho Appetitus faith now I think Morpheus himself hath been here up with a pox to you up you luske I have such news to tell thee sirra all the Senses are well and Lingua is proved guilty up up up I never knew him so fast a sleep in my life Appetitus snorts Nay then have at you a fresh tiff toff tiff toff APP. Jog me once again and I le throw this whole messe of pottage in your face cannot one stand quiet at the dresser for you ANA. Ha ha I think it 's impossible for him to sleep longer then he dreams of his victuals What Appetitus up quickly quickly up Appetitus quickly sirra toff toff toff toff APP. I le come presently but I hope you le stay till they be roasted will you eat them raw ANA. Roasted ha ha ha ha up up away APP, Reach the sauce quickly here 's no Sugar whaw wam oh oh oh oh ANA. What never wake Tiff toff tiff toff wilt never be Then I must trie another way I see Epilogus JƲdicious Friends it is so late at night I cannot waken hungry Appetite Then since the cloase upon his rising stands Let me obtain this at your courteous hands Trie if the friendly opportunity Of your good will and gracious Plauditie With the thrice welcome murmure it shal keep Can beg this prisoner from the hands of sleep Upon the Plaudite Appetitus awakes and runs in after Anamnestes FINIS Courteous Reader these Books following are Printed and sold by Simon Miller at the Star in St. Pauls Church-yard Large Folio LUther's Colloquium Mensalia Small Folio THe Civil Wars of Spain in the Reign of Charles the fifth Emperor of Germany and King of that Nation where in our late unhappy differences are parallel'd in many particulars A general History of Scotland from the year 767. to the death of King James containing the principal Revolutions and transactions of Church and State with political observations and reflections upon the same By David Hume of Gods-croft The History of this Iron Age Doctor Lightfoot his Harmony on the New Testament In Quarto Large BArklay his Argenis Translated by Sir Robert le Grise Knight Quarto small ABraham's faith or the good old Religion proving the Doctrine of the Church of England to be the only true faith of Gods Elect By J. Nicholson Minister of the Gospell The Anatomy of Mortallity by George Stroad Aynsworth on the Canticles Paul Bayne his Diocesans Trial The supream power of Christian States and Magistracy vindicated from the insolent pretences of Guillilmus Apolonius By E. Grall A Treatise of Civil Pollicy being a clear decision of 43. queries concerning prerogative right and priviledge in reference to the supreme Prince and the people By Sumuel Rutherford professor of Divinity of St. Andrews in Scotland Politick and Military observations of Civill and Military Government containing the birth increase decay of Monarchies the carriage of Princes and Magistrates Mr. Pinchin his meritorious price of mans redemption cleared Astrology Theologized shewing what nature and influence the Stars and Planets have over men and how the same may be diverted and avoided Octavo THe Reconciler of the Bible wherin above 2000. seeming contradictions are fully and plainly reconciled A view of the Jewish Religion with their Rites Customes and Ceremonies Ed. Waterhouse Esq his discourse of piety and charity A view and defence of the Reformation of the Church of England very useful in these times Mr. Peter du Moulin his Antidote against Popery published on purpose to prevent the delusions of the Priests and Jesuits who are now very busie amongst us Herberts Devotions or a Companion for a Christian containing Meditations and prayers useful upon all occasions Mr. Knowles his Rudiment of the Hebrew Tongue A Book of scheams or figures of heaven ready set for every four minuits of times and very useful for all Astrologers Florus Anglicus or an exact History of England from the reign of William the Conqueror to the death of the late King Lingua or the combat of the Tongue and the five Senses for superiority a serious Comedy The Spirits Touchstone being a clear discovery how a man may certainly know whether he be truly taught by the spirit of God or not The Poor mans Physitian and Chirurgeon Duodecem DOctor Smith's practice of Physick The Grammer War Poselius Apothegmes Faciculus Florum Crashaw's Visions Helvicus Colloquies The Christian Souldier his combat with the three arch enemies of mankind the world the flesh and the divel In 24. THe New Testament The third part of the Bible Plaies THe Ball Chawbut Martyr'd Souldier FINIS
Lingua OR THE COMBAT OF The Tongue AND THE Five SENSES FOR SUPERIORITY A pleasant Comoedy London Printed for Simon Miller at the Starre in St Pauls Church-yard 1657 LINGUA DRAMMATIS Personae LINGUA COMOEDUS TRACAEDUS AUDITUS MENDACIO LINGUA his Page TACTUS OLFACTUS ODOR TOBACCO VISUS LUMEN COELUM TERRA HERALDRY COLOR GUSTUS BACCHUS CERUS BEERE APPETITUS a Parasite PHANTASTES HEURESIS PHANTASTES his Page CRAPULA GUSTUS his Follower COMMUNIS SENSUS MEMORIA ANAMNESTES MEMORIE his Page SOMNUS Personae quarum mentio tantum fit PSENCE ARCASIA VERITAS OELIVIO The Scene is MICROCOSMUS in a Grove The Time from Morning till night Prologue OUr Muse describes no Lovers passion No wretched Father no unthrifty Son No craving subtile Whore or shameless Bawd Nor stubborn Clown or daring Parasite No lying Servant or bold Sycophant We are not wanton or Satyricall These have their time and places fit but we Sad hours and serious studies to reprive Have taught severe Phylosophy to smile The Senses rash contentions we compose And give displeas'd ambitious TONGUE her due Here 's all Judicious friends accept what is not ill Who are not such let them do what they will Actus 1. Scena 1. LINGUA apparelled in a Crimson Sattin gown a Dressing of white Roses a little Skean tyed in a purple Skarf a pair of red Buskins drawn with white Ribband silk garters gloves c. AUDITUS in a Garland of Bayes intermingled with red and white Roses upon a false hayr a cloath of Silver Mantle upon a pair of Sattin Bases wrought sleeves Buskins Gloves c. LINGUA AUDITUS LING. NAy good Auditus do but hear me speak AUD. Lingua thou strik'st too much upon one string Thy tedious plain-song grates my tender ears LING. 'T is plain indeed for Truth no descant needs Una's her name she cannot be divided AUD. O but the ground it self is nought from whence Thou canst not relish out a good division Therefore at length surcease prove not stark mad Hopelesse to prosecute a haplesse sute For though perchance thy first strains pleasing are I dare ingage mine ears the cloze will jarre LING. If then your confidence esteem my cause To be so frivolous and weakly wrought Why do you daily subtile plots devise To stop me from the ears of common Sense Whom since our great Queen Psyche hath ordain'd For his sound wisdome our Vice-governour To him and to his two so wise assistants Nimble Phantastes and firm Memorie My self and cause I humbly do commit Let them but hear and judg I wish no more AUD. Should they but know thy rash presumption They would correct it in the sharpest sort Good Jove what Sense hast thou to be a Sense Since from the first foundation of the world We never were accounted more then five Yet you forsooth an idle prating Dame Would fain increase the number and up-start To our high seats decking your babling self With usurpt Titles of our dignity LING. An idle prating dame know fond Auditus Records affirm my title full as good As his amongst the five is counted best AUD Lingua confess the truth th' art wont to lie LING. I say so too therefore I do not lye But now spite of you all I speak the truth You five among us subjects tyrannize Making the sacred name of common Sense A cloak to cover your enormities Hee bears the rule hee 's judg but judgeth still As hee 's informed by your false evidence So that a plaintiff cannot have access But through your gates he hears but what nought els But that thy crafty ears to him conveys And all he sees is by proud Visus shewed him And what he touches is by Tactus hand And smels I know but through Olfactus nose Gustus begins to him what ere he tastes By these quaint tricks free passage hath been barr'd That I could never equally be heard But well 't is well AUD. Lingua thy feeble sex Hath hitherto with-held my ready hands That long'd to pluck that nimble instrument LING. O horrible ingratitude that thou That thou of all the rest should'st threaten me Who by my means conceiv'st as many tongues As Neptune closeth Lands betwixt his armes The ancient Hebrew clad with mysteres The learned Greek rich in fit Epithetes Blest in the lovely marriage of pure words The Chaldee Wise the Arabian Physicall The Romane Eloquent the Tuscane Grave The Braving Spanish and the smooth tong'd French These pretious Iewels that adorn thine ears All from my mouthes rich Cabbinet are stolne How oft hast thou been chain'd unto my tongue Hang'd at my lips and ravisht with my words So that a speech fair fether'd could not flie But thy ears pit-fall caught it instantly But now O Heavens AUD. O Heavens thou wrong'st me much Thou wrong'st me much thus falsly to upbraid me Had not I granted thee the use of hearing That sharp edg'd tongue whetted against her master Those puffing lungs those teeth those dropsie lips That scalding throat those nosthrils full of ire Thy palate proper instruments of speech Like to the winged chanters of the wood Uttring nought else but idle stiflements Tunes without sense words inarticulate Had ne're been able t' have abus'd me thus Words are thy Children but of my begetting LING. Perfidious Liar how can I endure thee Cal'st my unspotted chastity in Question O could I use the Breath mine anger spends I 'de make thee know AUD. Heaven look on my distresse Defend me from this railing viperesse For if I stay her words sharp vinegar Will fret me through Lingua I must be gone I hear one call me more then earnestly Exit Auditus LING. Nay the loud cannoning of thunder-bolts Screeking of Wolves houling of tortur'd Ghosts Pursue thee still and fill thy amazed ears With cold astonishment and horrid fears O how these senses muffle common sense And more and more with pleasing objects strive To dull his judgement and pervert his will To their be-hests who were he not so wrapt I' the dusky clouds of their dark policies Would never suffer right to suffer wrong Fie Lingua wilt thou now degenerate Art not a woman dost not love revenge Delightfull speeches sweet perswasions I have this long time us'd to get my right My right that is to make the Senses six And have both name and power with the rest Oft have I seasoned savory periods With sugred words to delude Gustus taste And oft embelisht my entreative phrase With smelling flowers of vernant Rhetorique Limming and flashing it with various Dyes To draw proud Visus to me by the eyes And oft perfum'd my petitory style With Civet-speech t' entrap Olfactus Nose And clad my self in Silken Eloquence To allure the nicer touch of Tactus hand But all 's become lost labour and my cause Is still procrastinated therefore now Hence ye base off-spring of a broken minde Supple intreaties and smooth flatteries Go kisse the love-sick lips of puling Guls That still their Brain to quench their loves disdain Go guild the tongues of Bawds and
their ungrateful bosomes and your smooth-belly fat-backt barrel-pauncht tun-gutted drones are never without him as for Memory he 's a false-hearted fellow he always deceives them they respect not him except it be to play a game at Chess Primero Saunt Maw or such like Mend. I cannot think such fellows have to do with Oblivio since they never got any thing to forget ANA. Again these prodigal swaggerers that are so much bound to their Creditors if they have but one Crosse about them they 'l spend it in wine upon Oblivio MEN. To what purpose I prethee ANA. Only in hope he 'l wash them in the Lethe of their cares MEN. Why then no man cares for thee ANA. Yes a company of studious paper-worms and lean Schollers and niggardly scraping Usurers and a troop of heart-eating envious persons and those cancker-stomackt spiteful creatures that furnish up common place-books with other mens faults The time hath been in those golden days when Saturn reigned that if a man received a benefit of another I was presently sent for to put him in mind of it but now in these Iron afternoons save your friends life and Oblivio will be more familiar with him then you ACTUS 3. SCENA 3. Heuresis Mend. Anamnestes HEU. Phantastes not at Court is 't possible 't is the strangest accident that ever was heard off I had thought the Ladies and Gallants would never lie without him ANA. Hist hist Mendacio I prethee observe Heuresis it seems he cannot find his Master that 's able to find out all things and art thou now at a fault canst not find out thine own Master no I le try one more way O yes MEND. What a Proclamation for him AN. I I his nimble head is always full of proclamations HEU. O yes MEND. But doth he cry him in the wood AN. O good Sir and good reason for every beast hath Phantasie at his pleasure HEU. O yes If any man can tell any tidings of a spruce neat apish nimble fine foolish absurd humerous conceited Phantastick Gallant with hollow eyes sharp look swart complexion meager face wearing as many toyes in his apparel as fooleries in his looks and gesture let him come forth and certifie me thereof and he shall have for his reward AN. I can tell you where he is what shall he have HEU. A box o' the ear sirra snap AN. How now invention are you so quick fingred in faith there 's your principle sirra snap and here 's the interest ready in my hand snap They fall together by the ears Yea have you found out scratching now I remember me HEU. Do you bite you Rascal MEND. Ha ha ha ha ha here 's the lively picture of this axiome A quick Invention and a good Memory can never agree Fie fie fie Heuresis beat him when he 's down ANA. Prethee le ts alone proud Jack-an-Apes I le HEU. What will you do AN. Untrusse thy points and whip thee thou paltry Let me go Mendacio if thou lovest me shall I put up the MEND. Come come come you shall fight no more in good faith Heuresis your Master will catch you anon HEU. My Master where is he MEN. I le bring you to him come away HEU. Anamnestes I scorn that thou shouldst think I go away for fear of any thing thou canst do unto me here 's my hand as soon as thou canst pick the least occasion put up thy finger I am for thee Exit Mendacio and Heuresis AN. When thou dar'st Heuresis when thou dar'st I le be as ready as thy self at any time This Heuresis this invention is the proudest Jack-an-Apes the peartest self-conceited Boy that ever breath'd because forsooth some odd Poet or some such Phantastique fellows make much on him there 's no no with him the vile dandi-prat will ore-look the proudest of his acquaintance but well I remember me I learnt a trick t'other day to bring a Boy ore the thigh finely if he come in faith I le tickle him with it Mendacio comes running back in great haste MEN. As I am a Rascal Nam they are all coming I see Master Register trudging hither as fast as his three feet will carry up his four Ages Exit Mendacio ACTUS 3. SCENA 4. MEMORIA ANAMESTES MEM. Ah you leaden-heel'd Rascal ANA. Here 't is Sir I have it I have it MEM. Is this all the haste you make ANA. An 't like your worship your Clog-head Oblivio went before me and foil'd the trail of your foot-steps that I could hardly undertake the quest of your purse forsooth MEM. You might have been here long ere this Come hither sirra come hither what must you go round about goodly goodly you are full of circumstances ANA. In truth Sir I was here before and missing you went back into the City sought you in every Ale-house Inn Tavern Dicing-house Tennis-court Stews and such like places likely to find your worship in MEM. Ha villain am I a man likely to be found in such places ha ANA. No no Sir Sir but I was told by my Lady Lingua's Page that your Worship was seeking me therefore I enquired for you in those places where I knew you would ask for me and it please your worship MEM. I remember another quarrel sirra but well well I have no leisure ACT. 3. SCENA 5. Com. Sens Lingua Phantastes Memory Anamnestes COM. S. Lingua the Senses by our appointment anon are to present their objects before us seeing therefore they be not in readinesse we license you in the mean while either in your own person or by your Advocate to speak what you can for your self LIN. My Lord if I should bring before your honour all my friends ready to importune you in my behalf I should have so many Rhetoricians Logitians Lawyers and which is more so many women to attend me that this Grove would hardly contain the company wherefore to avoid the tediousnesse I will lay the whole cause upon the tip of mine own tongue COM. SEN. Be as brief as the necessity of our short time requires LIN. My Lord though the Imbecillitas of my feeble sex might draw me back from this Tribunal with the habenis to wit Timoris and the Catenis Pudoris notwithstanding being so fairly led on with the gracious {non-Roman} {non-Roman} {non-Roman} of your justissimae {non-Roman} {non-Roman} {non-Roman} Especially so aspremente spurd con'gli sproni di necessita mia pungente I Will without the helpe of Orators commit the totam salutem of my action to the Volutabilitati {non-Roman} {non-Roman} {non-Roman} which avecuostre bonne playseur I will finish with more then Laconicâ brevitate CO. SE. What 's this here 's a Gallemaufry of speech indeed MEM. I remember about the yeare 1602. many used this skew kind of language Which in my opinion is not much unlike the man Platony the the Sonne of Lagus King of Aegypt brought for a spectacle halfe white halfe blacke CO. SE. I am perswaded these same language-makers have
ha ha take away your hands I cannot endure ah you tickle me ah ha ha ha ah VIS. Hai rett rett rett now bird now look about that bush she trust her thereabout here she is ware wing Cater ware wing avaunt LING. Mum mum mum mum PH. st sirra take heed you wake her not HEU. I know Sir she 's fast asleep for her mouth is shut LING. This 't is to venture upon such uncertainties to lose so rich a Crown to no end well well PH. Ha ha ha we shall hear anon where she lost her maiden-head st boy my Lord Vicegerent and Master Register are hard by run quickly tell them of this accident wish them come softly Exit Heuresis LING. Mendacio never talk farther I doubt 't is past recovery and my Robe likewise I shall never have them again well well PH. How her Crown and her Robe never recover them hum wa st not said to be left by Memory ha I conjecture here 's some knavery fast lockt with sleep in good faith Was that Crown and Garment yours Lingua LING. I marry were they and that some body hath felt and shall feel more if I live PHA. O strange she answers in her sleep to my question but how come the Senses to strive for it LING. Why I laid upon purpose in their way that they might fall together by the ears PHA. What a strange thing is this ACT. 5. SCEN. 18. The Senses Appetitus Lingua a sleep Phantastes Communis Sensus Memoria Anamnestes PHA. st my Lord softly softly here 's the notablest piece of treason discovered how say you Lingua set all the Senses at odds she hath confest it to me in her sleep CHM S. I st possible Master Register did you ever know any talk in their sleep MEM. I remember my Lord many have done so very oft but women are troubled especially with this talking disease many of them have I heard answer in their dreams and tell what they did all day awake ANAM. By the same token there was a wanton maid that being askt by her Mother what such a one did with her so late one night in such a room she presently said that MEM. Peace you vild rake hell is such a jest fit for this company no more I say sirra PH. My Lord will you believe your own ears you shall hear her answer me as directly and truly as may be Lingua what did you with the Crown and Garments LING. I le tell thee Mendacio PH. She thinks Mendacio speaks to her mark now mark how truly she will answer what say you Madam LING. I say Phantastes is a foolish transparent gull a meer fanatick nupson in my imagination not worthy to sit as a Judges assistant COM. S. Ha ha ha how truly and directly she answers PHA. Faw faw she dreams now she knows not what she saies I le trie her once again Madame what remedy can you have for your great losses LING. O are you come Acrasia welcome welcome boy reach a Cushion sit down good Acrasia I am so beholding to you your potion wrought exceedingly the senses were so mad did not you see how they raged about the woods COM. S. Hum Acrasia is Acrasia her confederate my life that Witch hath wrought some villany Lingua viseth in her sleep and walketh How 's this is she a sleep have you seen one walk thus before MEM. It is a very common thing I have seen many sick of a Peripatetick disease ANA. By the same token my Lord I knew one that went abroad in his sleep bent his bow shot at a Magpie kild her fetcht his arrow came home lockt the dores and went to bed again COM. S. What should be the reason of it MEM I remember Scalliger told me the reason once as I think thus The nerves that carrie the moving faculty from the brains to the thighs legs feet and armes are wider far then the other nerves wherefore they are not so easily stopt with the vapours of sleep but are night and day ready to perform what fancy shall command them COM. S. It may be so but Phantastes enquire more of Acrasia PHA. What did you with with the potion Acrasia made you LIN. Gave it to the Senses and made them as mad as well If I cannot recover it let it go I le not leave them thus She lies down again CON. S. Boy awake the Senses there AN. Hoe hoe Auditus up up so hoe Olfactus have at your nose up Visus Gustus Tactus up What can you not feel a pinch have at you with a pin TAC. Oh you stab me oh COM. S. Tactus know you how you came hither TAC. No my Lord not I this I remember We sup't with Gustus and had wine good store Whereof I think I tasted liberally Among the rest we drunk a composition Of a most dellicate and pleasant rellish That made our brains somewhat irregular ACTUS 4. SCENA 7. The Senses awake Lingua a sleep Communis Sensus Memory Anamnestes Heuresis drawing Crapula HEU. My Lord here 's a fat rascal was lurking in a bush very suspitiously his name he saies is Crapula COM. S. Sirrah speak quickly what you know of these troubles CRA. Nothing my Lord but that the Senses were mad and that Somnus at my request laid them a sleep in hope to recover them COM. S. Why then t is too evident Acrasia at Lingua's request bewitcht the Senses wake her quickly Heuresis LIN. Heigh ho out alas aye me where am I how came I here where am I ah COM. S. Lingua look not so strangely upon the matter you have confest in your sleep that with a Crown and a Robe you have disturb'd the Senses using a crafty help to enrage them can you deny it LIN. Aye mee most miserable wretch I beseech your Lordship forgive me COM. S. No no t is a fault unpardonable He consults with Memory PHAN. In my conceit Lingua you should seal up your lips when you go to bed these Feminine tongues be so glib COM. S. Visus Tactus and the rest our former sentence concerning you we confirm as irrevocable and establish the Crown to you Visus and the Robe to you Tactus but as for you Lingua LIN. Let me have mine own howsoever you determine I beseech you COM S. That may not be your goods are fallen into our hands my sentence cannot be recall'd you may see those that seek what is not theirs oftentimes loose what 's their own Therefore Lingua granting you your life I commit you to close Prison in Gustus his house and charge you Gustus to keep her under the custody of two strong dores and every day till she come to 80. years of age see she be well guarded with 30. tall watchmen without whose license she shall by no means wag abroad nevertheless use her Lady-like according to her estate PHAN. I pray you my Lord ad this to the judgement that whensoever she obtaineth license to walk abroad in token the Tongue was the cause of