can escape the nicety of their Distinctions They forsooth will tell us that we must not be over-stock'd with Friends for that 's the way to involve one Man in the Cares of a Multitude who at the same time has enow and it may be too many of his own That 't is troublesom to have too great an Interest in other Mens Concerns and more convenient to have the Knot of Friendship as slight and as loose as we can that upon occasion we may streighten or slacken it as we see fit That Quiet is the readiest Means to obtain Happiness which the mind can never enjoy if it must be in continual labour for the Fortunes of so many several Men. Others they say are of a more selfish Opinion which I have hinted at already that Friendship was to be desir'd for Convenience and Interest not for Love and Affection And therefore the more helpless a Man is the more reason he has to seek a Friend from hence say they it comes to pass that Women rather than Men the Poor rather than the Rich the Distressed rather than the Happy fly to Friendship as a Sanctuary Brave Wisdom indeed They may as well rob the World of the Sun as Human Life of Friendship the best and happiest Gift of Heaven But what is that Quiet they talk of which in appearance may be pleasant but is really to be avoided in most cases Would any Man in his Wits excuse himself from undertaking an honorable Action or Employment or lay it down when he has undertaken it merely because there is some trouble in the performance of it He that would avoid all Care must by the same Rule avoid Vertue which cannot without some difficulty reject and hate it's contrary as Good does Evil Temperance Lust or Courage Cowardice Thus you see Vertuous Men have the strongest aversion for those that are Vitious the Valiant for those that are Fearful and the Sober for those that are Lewd 'T is therefore essential to a well govern'd Mind to delight in all that is Good and to be offended at all that is otherwise Now since Trouble will sometimes befal the wisest Man which it must necessarily do unless we can suppose him devested of all Humanity I see no reason why we should banish Friendship from our Life because it may give us a little trouble Take but away the Affections of the Soul and tell me what difference there is I will not say between a Beast and a Man but between a Man and a Stone a Stock or any senssess thing We must not hearken to those that will make Vertue so hard and cruel a Mistress which in all things is easy and gentle especially in Friendship where she allows us a well to share the Comforts of our Friend's Prosperity as the Sorrows of his Adversity Therefore Friendship is not to be laid aside because some trouble must be undergon for a Friend no more than Vertue is to be neglected because it is attended with some difficulties Now Vertue being as I told you the very Cement of Affection when That appears so eminently in one Man as to create in another of the like disposition a desire of being joyn'd to him when I say this happens an Amity must necessarily follow And methinks 't is strange that Men should take so much Pleasure in the Vanities and Superfluities of Life as Honor Grandeur Building Dressing and Beautifying the Body and yet find no delight in a Mind enrich'd with Vertue that knows where to bestow and how to return Affection For certainly nothing can be more Charming than a Correspondence of Kindness and a mutual intercourse of friendly Offices Now if we add what we justly may that Likeness is so attractive of Friendship as nothing more 't will easily be granted that Vertuous Men love such as are Vertuous and delight to associate with them as if there were already some Alliance in Nature and Affinity in Blood For nothing is more desirous and I may say greedy of it's Like than Nature And now Fannius and Scoevola I hope I have demonstrated the necessity of a good Will between good Men which is the natural spring of Friendship But this Goodness is of a large extent For Vertue is not so selfish insociable or proud but that she is equally communicative of her Benefits to every particular and active for the publick Good which would never be had she not an universal kindness for all Therefore they that make Interest an inducement to Friendship seem to me to loosen it's most amiable Tye for 't is not so much the Advantages we receive from a Friend as the Love he has for us that ought to be valued and then it is that a good turn is most acceptable when it comes with a good will Now 't is so far from being true that Friendship proceeds from Necessity that they who abound most in the possession of Riches and Vertue which of all things has least need of any outward assistance are generally the most liberal and readiest to oblige Yet I question whether 't is always necessary that nothing should be wanting between Friends For if Scipio had never stood in need of my Service Advice or Assistance neither at home nor abroad what proofs had their been of our mutual Affection Therefore Convenience and Interest ought not to be the causes but the consequences of Friendship We must not give ear to those Worldlings who entertain such notions of Friendship as are grounded neither upon their knowledge nor their experience For God knows what Man living would purchase the greatest Wealth and Plenty in the World at so dear a rate as not to Love the rest of Mankind nor to be belov'd by them This were to live the Life of a Tyrant destitute of the least assurance of Kindness or common good Will and so full of Jealousies and Distrusts that there is no room for Friendship For who can Love that Man whom he Fears or by whom he thinks himself to be Fear'd Tyrants are flatter'd indeed for a while with an appearance of Friendship but when they fall as commonly they do then they see too plainly how few Friends they have 'T is reported of Tarquin that he should say in his Banishment that now he could discern his Friends from his Enemies when he was not in a capacity of being useful to the one or hurtful to the other Tho' I should wonder if so proud and cruel a Tyrant could find one Friend in the World Now as this Man 's ill qualities gain'd him no true Friends so commonly the affluence of Wealth indisposes some Men for a real Friendship For Fortune is not only Blind her self but she hoodwinks her Favourites so that they are generally puff'd up with Pride and self-conceit and certainly nothing is more unsufferable than a fortunate Fool. Of this we have frequent instances in some whose humor is at first not disagreeable till Honor Power and Prosperity make such an
Cicero's LAELIUS A DISCOURSE OF FRIENDSHIP Together with a Pastoral Dialogue Concerning FRIENDSHIP and LOVE Licensed Rob. Midgley LONDON Printed for William Crooke at the Green-Dragon without Temple-Bar 1691. THE PREFACE THE usual design of a Preface is either for an Introduction to the Book it self or an Apology to the Reader for the Publication of it the Former of these being the more pertinent and useful of the two thô 't is partly done already by my Author I shall insist most upon that The following Discourse was written by Tully as Himself observes in his later years which produc'd many excellent Treatises in This particularly we find more of Majesty than Gaiety in his Style we see the Philosopher joyn'd to the Orator and which is somewhat rare the Friend to the States man he being qualify'd besides his own natural Abilities by a long experience of Friendship in his familiarity with Pomponius Atticus to treat of this Subject with great exactuess The Discourse being occasion'd by Scipio's Death and his Character making so considerable a part of it it will not be improper to set down some brief Memoirs of his Life which may serve to explain several Passages in this Treatise He was the Son of Paullus Aemilius the greatest General of his time from whom he was call'd Aemilianus Plutarch in Vit. Paulli Aemilij and upon the Divorce that happen'd between his Parents was adopted by the Son of Africanus major his Cousin-german and by him nam'd Scipio Plutarch says that from his Youth he was endu'd above any of his Equals with all the good Qualities requisite in a General or a States-man Ibid. First He serv'd under his Father in the Macedonian War and had a considerable share in the defeat of Perseus's Army Afterwards Oros Lib. 4. Cap. 23. in the Third Punic War which began 606 Years after the Building of Rome and lasted 4 Years he overthrew Carthage and from his Successes in Africk got the Title of Africanus Minor About 15 Years after that Oros Lib. 5. he reduc'd Numantia after it had held out for 14 Years against the Romans Whilst he lay with his Army before this Place Plutarch in Vit. Tib. Gracch Oros Lib. 5. Cap. 8. the Sedition of the Gracchi broke out at Rome and Tiberius Gracchus the Elder of the two Brothers having endeavour'd the establishment of some new Laws in favour of the Commons which were against the interest of the Nobility was slain in the Capitol in his Second Tribuneship Vpon Scipio's return to Rome he being ask'd by Caius Gracchus and Fulvius Plutarch in Vit. C. Gracch what he thought of Tiberius's Death reply'd That he always dislik'd Tiberius's way of Proceeding This Answer thô 't was deliver'd with a great deal of sincerity lost him the affections of the Populace and mightily iucens'd Caius Soon after this Idem ibid. in Vit. Romuh Scipio was found dead in his Bed and no outward Cause of his Death appear'd Some said he dy'd easily and suddainly having been naturally sickly others that he poison'd himself others that his Enemies who were suppos'd to be Caius Gracchus and Fulvius broke in upon him in the night and stifled him Certain it is that they Two were suspected to be the Authors of his Death and tho' his Body lay open to be seen of all and gave some suspicion of a violent Death yet there was no publick Enquiry made into it and 't was thought the Rabble oppos'd all Proceedings of Justice for fear that Caius should be found accessary to the Murder His Death happen'd in Caius's second Tribuneship who pursuing the same measures with his Brother suffer'd the same fate and being forsaken by all his Adherents was slain by his own Servant Plutarch in Vit. Paull Aemil. Scipio in his life-time was esteem'd the Valiantest of the Romans and had the greatest Authority among them He was a strict abserver of Military Discipline Flor. Lib. 2. Cap. 18. and made a great Reformation in the Army His vacant hours were employ'd in the Study of Philosophy and Politicks in which he had Panaetius and Polybius for his Masters Thus was his Life divided between the Arts of War and Peace in both which his Friend Laelius shar'd with him who was no less famous for Wisdom than Scipio for Valor In Vit. Ti. Gracch Plutarch gives us a remarkable Instance of his prudent management in the Divisions that happen'd in Rome about the Agratian Law which gain'd him the Name of Laelius the Wise Thus much by way of Introduction As for the Apology tho' I think the Translation wants it very much for really I don't know how to justify the Presumption of an attempt to express Tully's Conceptions in any other Language or Words than his own yet I 'm sure the Poem that follows stands in most need of it and being more my Own must consequently be more obnoxious to Censure However I have ventur'd to place it at the End as treating of the same Subject tho' upon a different Occasion I hope the Fair Sex will not think their Prerogative invaded because in that Poem I prefer Friendship to Love since the Love I condemn there is a Passion which I dare say the Best and Modestest part of them will not think themselves concern'd to defend As for Conjugal Love I look upon it as a Vnion of Souls as well as Bodies and a State so exactly conformable to all the Laws of Friendship that methinks the Names of Friend and Wife should signifie the same They who will think it something unseasonable for Me to be giving Rules of Friendship when all the World is in Arms may as well blame Laelius for making this Discourse when Rome was distracted by the Ambition of Gracchus and Tully for publishing it at a time when all Italy was divided by the Factions of Pompey and Caesar Certainly Remedies are never more Necessary than when Diseases are most Epidemical I hope the Reader is not curious to know whether these Papers are publish'd at the Importunity of Friends by the Command of Superiors or for the Prevention of false Copies These are the common Topics which every Prefacer makes use of to justify his intrusion into the Press I shall therefore wave all Evasions and boldly but my self upon my Reader 's mercy for I don't understand why an Author may not have the liberty of keeping his Reasons to himself as well as his Name CICERO'S LAELIUS A DISCOURSE OF FRIENDSHIP The Author 's Prefatory Epistle To T. Pomponius Atticus QVintus Mucius Scaevola the Augur would often talk of Caius Laelius his Father-in-Law with a great deal of pleasure and in all his Discourses gave him the Title of Wise As soon as I came to Age my Father dispos'd of me so entirely to this Scaevola that unless some extraordinary occasion call'd me away I was never from him During this time I furnish'd my Memory with many excellent Sayings and useful
enough that I am forc'd for to deny so fair Request to one's Kinsmen were not only unkind but unreasonable As often therefore as I think upon Friendship this Consideration offers it self first to my thoughts whether Weakness or Necessity should be any inducements to contract a Friendship that so whereas either Party would be helpless of himself the Occasions of the one might be supply'd by the other and all kind Offices perform'd by both in a mutual reciprocation of Benefits whether I say this might properly be call'd Friendship or whether there were not some other Motive of greater worth and beauty which proceeds from Nature And certainly Love from whence the Name of Friendship is deriv'd in Latin is the first and strongest tye of our Affections Some Men shall receive a good Turn from those whom they only flatter with an outward shew of Friendship and to whom they pay a Respect suitable to their present occasions But Friendship will not admit of any Disguise or Dissimulation whatever proceeds from That must be sincere and voluntary So that methinks Friendship arises rather from Nature than Want and from a secret application of the Mind with a tender sense of Love rather than from any consideration how to make it serviceable to our Interest Experience shews us this in most Animals who for a time love their Young so entirely and are so well belov'd by them that one may easily perceive the force of Nature in these Creatures which is more eminently apparent in Man First from the mutual Love between Parents and their Children which nothing but some horrible Crime can destroy and next when there are equal grounds for Love on both sides as when we light upon one of the same Temper and Disposition with our selves in whom we have discover'd some eminent Ray of Goodness and Vertue For nothing is more amiable than Vertue nothing more attractive of our Affections We find in our selves an inclination for some Persons whom we never saw meerly upon the Report of their Vertue Who has not an honor and esteem for the Memory of C. Fabricius and M Curius tho' he never beheld them Who does not at the same time detest Tarquinius Superbus Sp. Cassius and Sp. Moelius When the two Generals Pyrrhus and Hannibal strove for the Mastery in Italy we had no great aversion to the former because of his Generosity the later Rome always hated for his Cruelty Now since the power of Vertue is so great as to render it lovely in a Stranger and which is more in an Enemy 't is no wonder if we are affected with it when we see it every day in an Acquaintance Tho' I must confess Friendship is mightily confirm'd by receiving some demonstrations of Kindness by an experience of Love and by frequent Conversation All which being added to that first Motive of Love will flame out into a wonderful Endearment of Friendship now if any one thinks this to proceed from a Weakness in our selves and a design to obtain private Ends and Interests upon others he makes the Rise of Friendship mean and ignoble by ascribing it to Necessity and Want which at that rate would best qualifie a Man for Friendship But 't is quite otherwise For he that has most assurance in himself and is endued with so much Wisdom and Vertue that he wants no Body but has every thing that is needful within himself this Man is worthiest to gain and preserve a Friend How did Africanus want me Not at all Neither did I stand in need of Him but as I lov'd him out of an Honor I had for his Vertue so He regarded me for some little Esteem he had of mine Time and Conversation increas'd our Affection And tho' many and great Conveniences on both sides did arise from thence yet we never made the hopes of them any Inducements to contract a Friendship For as we are sometimes willing to assist and oblige one another not through any hopes of Requital for that were to put a Benefit out to Use but because we are all naturally inclin'd to Humanity So methinks we should cover Friendship not for any expectation of an outward Recompence but because it is always its own Reward Some who like Brutes place all Happiness in Pleasure have a quite different Notion of Friendship but 't is no wonder if such as misplace their Affections upon so low and worthless an Object can never raise them to the contemplation of any thing that is Sublime Noble and Divine Such therefore we shall exclude from our discourse and rest satisfi'd that Nature creates in us all a propensity to Love and that the appearance of Vertue begets a true and sincere Affection This last Motive makes us place our selves as near as we can to Him we love that we may more freely enjoy the benefit of his Conversation and Manners that there may be an equality and correspondence in love and a readiness to oblige without the least expectation of a Return From this kind Contention many Benefits will arise and its Foundation will be stronger and surer than that of Weakness and Want For if Interest were the only tye of Friendship when one fails the other cannot last but because Nature cannot be chang'd therefore true Friendship which proceeds from Nature is immutable and eternal Thus have I shewn you the Rise of Friendship Would you know any thing further SCAEVOLA Good Loelius proceed for Fannius who is my Junior I dare Answer FANNIUS My Brother has spoken my Mind therefore pray Sir let us hear you on LAELIUS Hear then Gentlemen what Scipio and I have often said of Friendship He always thought that nothing was more difficult than to preserve an inviolate Friendship till Death For things may so happen that the Interests of Friends will be distinct or their Opinions in Matters of State different We find said He every day that the Humors of Men change with their Condition or their Tears An Instance of this he brought from Children who commonly lay aside their greatest Friendships with their Play-things or if they continued them till their Youth they were generally parted by some dispute for a Pleasure or Advantage that could not be obtain'd by both at the same time but if any were so constant as to preserve their Friendship under these Trials yet at last it would be violated when both were Competitors in Honor For there is no greater bane of Friendship than among most Men Avarice among the Better sort Ambition these have too often prov'd the causes of great Enmities between the greatest Friends Besides said Scipio many and sometimes just Occasions of Separation are given by some Ill Men that expect to be gratifi'd by their Friend in every unlawful Request as that he should be an Instrument of their Lust or an Assistant to their Injustice which if he refuses to do let his Refusal be never so well grounded he shall be tax'd with a breach of Friendship tho' at the