begin where he should end must a poor Woman then be so unhappy that she cannot love a Man but straight he must imagine it to be for such fooleries and from the meanest Gentleman even to the Prince so soon as ever they think that one loves them is that the fair Complement they have to make us Her tears interrupted a little that Lamentation Then as if she had gained a considerable victory over her love no Sir said she I shall never consent to that Well then replied my Friend withdrawing coldly I 'le go give the Prince your answer Bless me replied she what haste you are in would you have me say yes at first dash ought you not to find out some reasons to overthrow mine before you go if all Messengers were of your humour no Lady should be reduced to give everlasting denials Madam de Moulionne could not forbear to interrupt him again saying Here 's a man for you indeed of whom we should have a special care if we will believe him and who gives pretty Characters of Women Madam answered he I give you the Character a of foolish fond Woman who resembles none of you but I have not said one half of what I might have told you of her You know Saint Soulieu continued he addressing himself to the Marquess and seeing he is the man that I employed you may judge what he is able to do It is true said the Marquess Saint Soulieu is a great Buffoon Let me die added the Chevalier if he had not an hours discourse with that fantastical Lady where they said things infinitely more pleasing than what I have related to you if I could but call them to mind Well well much alike I believe said Madamoiselle Velzers make an end Ah! Lady replied he how do I love that charming unpatience in you it is a sign that you are curious to hear of lovely passages With these words he put her to a terrible blush and then continuing his discourse at length said he the Lady granted the Prince the interview that he desired but with condition still that to ease her Modesty she should expect him without a light which after that they had made their acquaintance might be allowed and in that she did but luckily prevent the demand that Saint Soulieu was to make to her about that caution It was then agreed upon that the Prince should come about midnight with a Dark Lanthorn only which he should not open until the Lady gave him leave That her Landlord where she lodged should leave the Door open all Night That he should watch alone and that he should suffer those that minded to see her at that time of Night to go up unto her Chamber without informing himself who they were which Saint Soulieu in name of the Prince immediately ordered the Landlord to do who took it as a great honour that so Noble an Intrigue should be carried on in his house I went on in my part to act the Prince the best way I could and when the hour was come which I expected with the impatience of a man of good assignations I set out with my Friend Saint Soulieu to go to the field of Battel but a fearful misfortune which I had no ways foreseen waited for me there the Husband being informed that I solicited his Lady more than my Judges and being free from his Gout was come purposely to Paris to observe our Conduct Having not found his Beauty at Paris he stayed no longer than to bait his Horses and came with all speed to St. Germans Being conducted by the Hostler strait to his Ladies Lodgings he asked the Landlord where her Chamber was who taking him for one of the Princes Officers immediately shewed it him he went up just a little before I arrived and his Wife having at his entry called him his Highness taking him for the Prince was the cause of a terrible disorder for as I entered her Chamber immediately after him he caught hold of me by the Arm I was forced to open my dark Lanthorn to know who it was and the Lady at the sight of her Husband fainted away the Jealous man followed me out into the Street whither notwithstanding his resistance I ran We both drew and had come to blows if Saint Soulieu and a great many of the Neighbours had not parted us And this Ladies added the Chevalier is the true cause of the accident that befell me yesternight Saint Soulieu however made a kind of accommodation betwixt us for seeing we made use of the Princes name we were glad to prevent the noise of that adventure from coming to his ears though the Prince himself would have but laughed at it And after it had been represented to the jealous Husband that this happy arrival had prevented his shame on that occasion after a thousand Oaths I was forced to take that I should never mention it and he that he should never remember it more in fine after that I had willingly condemned my self to pay the expenses of the Law Suit they obliged us to embrace one another and I did it as heartily as if I had entertained no grudge for having hindered me from embracing his Lady notwithstanding you saw by the base action he intended to have committed last Night that he hath less patience than I And that is the reason that for the future I shall not forbear to tell some good Tales to his cost And by what chance said the Marquess to the Chevalier came he to meet you so pat on the Road By what chance replied the Chevalier I protest I know not unless that Traytor spied me at Fountain-Bleau where I saw him four or five days ago In truth said Madam de Moulionne there was never a more pleasant Story nor more foolishly told added the Marquess True said Madamoiselle de Barbisieux the Chevalier is none of the discreetest men amongst Ladies Ye complain when ye are too well served answered he If ye imagine to make him change his humour said Madamoiselle de Velzers ye are much mistaken Ye are all true Hypocrites replied the Chevalier and pretend to be vexed at that which pleases you most and if there were any thing to be found fault with in my way of Relation it is to Madamoiselle de Kermas who hath not said a word that I should refer my self rather than to you but I know very well that she has found no hurt in my discourse How I said that Lady I never play the Philosopher on the words of an Historian and I barely mind the Story without considering the Ornaments wherewith it is set off It had been better replied her Companion Velzers that you had been still silent than to have opened your lips to make such an answer and to declare against us But what would you have me say replied that Lady there is no hurt to be found in such Stories but what people imagine to themselves What still said Madam de
all her infidelities and that she abused me anger and jealousie did indeed seize my heart I thought that I had just right to entreat her to admit my Rival no more I accompanied my entreaty with a little sharpness She answered me that she would not admit either of us any more but was not so faithful to her promise for she kept her new Lover daily Company and it was I alone whom she would see no more That way of carriage put me into a rage and a friend of mine who pitied my condition undertook to deliver her a Letter in my name She refused it scoffingly as if it had been a great novelty that I should offer to write to her which made me stark staring mad I endeavoured however to imagine that my Messenger to whom she was not willing to own our Commerce was rather the cause of her refusal than that she wholly slighted me But my Rival came to see me after dinner and told me that he knew somewhat of the matter he had probably a mind to divert himself with my disorder that he might have occasion afterwards to laugh and make sport at it with her That gave me ground to conclude there was an intimacy betwixt them and was such a proof of my misfortune as quite deprived me of all reason Next day I met him again as he was fetching a walk He made it his business to speak to me again of that refused Letter What in Gods name said he to me hath put it into your head to fall in love with Mademoiselle de Ravenois and to send her love Letters you know that she is the most indifferent and jearing Maid in the World and by so saying he himself put a little dry jeast upon me But for all that answered I what do you think if she should not always refuse them if I did but send them by the hands of one whom she likes And whom would you employ replied he Your self said I if you will take the pains How me cried he by no means I should be too much afraid that seeing jealous Lovers are hasty you might insert in it some high words which might make me be thrown out at the Window at least I would desire to know before-hand the contents of the Letter O! with all my heart said I. And with that I pluckt it out of my pocket and gave him the reading of it At every word my Blade changed colour and that seemed to me a small beginning of revenge It would seem by that note said he that she had observed a very free and intimate way of conversation with you What do you mean answered I. A Lover knows not what he writes and if he be jealous he may fancy things that never were true Shortly after we took our leaves and he making no pretence but that he would go meet my unfaithful Mistress in Red hat street where she was to spend the whole Afternoon with two of her Cosins I followed him at some distance and went into the House after him There was a brisk Company met there Good Friends follow one another said one of them who partly knew our affairs how is it that they come both together He answered that we did not come together and that he might begin to entertain the Ladies with some thing he pretended that he had had some small adventures in his walk And to make him mad I pretended something also I am more fortunate than that Gentleman said I to the Company for I found under my feet a note worth ten of the Gentlemans adventures It is certainly the Letter of a jealous Lover added I and it is to my liking so pleasantly conceived that it will not displease you to hear it read At these words I had the satisfaction to see my Rival more and more perplexed and at a distance to revenge my self of my unconstant Lady in forcing her by that stratagem to learn what was in the note She had not strength enough however to hear it out A real or counterfeit indisposition gave her a pretext to go out of the room before it was ended This is all I did Ladies but this is not to publish a commerce that one hath had with a Mistress for except my Rival whom I was willing to inform of all none of the Company could ever have conjectured that it was addressed to her if matters had gone no farther Pardon me said Mademoiselle de Barbisieux you shewed the Letters that you had received from her to my Lady Marchioness of Vierson It is true answered he but if what I did at that time be not the part of a Gentleman there is none living any other besides my self would have done as much I understood that instead of endeavouring to use me civilly she jeasted and flouted at my love I payed a visit to that Marchioness she laughed at my jealousie the persidious Mistress had made her believe that she was so far from having any esteem for me that she knew me not I my self heard her say Alas Poor little man what is Monsieur de Lusigny in love with me how vexed am I that I did not know it sooner I heard worse than this and yet I have two hundred Letters by me which are not only very tender but full of transports and amorous conceits Good Heavens what kind of Lover must I have been if to make appear that I deserved no such slights I had not shewed these Letters But I shewed them not as in triumph but was only willing that the Marchioness might not think me a Fool without some reason of being so I went home I took all these irrefragable testimonies of the imprudence of my cruel Mistress brought them to that Lady here said I giving her them to read consider if I be well used and if a faithless Lady treat those so well for whom she has no esteem think then how she behaves her self towards those she loves Lusigny grew hot in reflecting on his amours so that it seemed he was still engaged in the dispute Ah! good little Sir said Mademoiselle de Barbisieux you are not as yet compleatly cured and even at this present you are angry with your detestable Mistress No answered he I assure you she is now very indifferent to me or at least if at any time I think of her it is only heartily to hate her I make no doubt of that replied Mademoiselle de Barbisieux laughing there are a great many such They had rather continually think on their unfaithful Mistresses to hate them than not to have the pleasure of thinking on them at all To tell you the truth replied he it is no easie matter to shake off a violent passion and I would not swear that I could see that Lady again without some sensible agitation of mind she has been two Months at Paris and as I was speaking the other day to a President of Parliament in his Robes who did me the honour to hear
pleasantest news in the World answered the Marquess that fair Lady is here between a pair of Sheets You are happy said Montal I would I had her as sure Ho! Be quiet said Madamoiselle Barbisieux to him you are already about to begin your usual fopperies They entered all afterward into the Garden with design to fetch a Walk before they went into the House and the Marquess being there pressed to tell what he had learned of his fair melancholick Lady he recounted to the Ladies the whole Story as he had just before heard it Well really said Madamoiselle de Barbisteux when he had made an end I protest I suspected last night that the Marquess had told us some made Tale and did not in the least believe that he was in chace of such an Adventure And so did I added Madam de Moulionne I fancied that his surprize in having met us when he desired no such thing had made him invent on the spot that which he told us for the truth is there was so little probability in it that if I had not heard what now I hear I should never have believed it and I suspected as you did some other mystery in his Journey Ye do me too great honour Ladies said the Marquess and I am truly very much obliged to you for these good opinions We speak not without reason replied Madam de Moulionne and I appeal to Madamoiselle Velzers and Madamoiselle de Kermas if the other day we were not told such things as might very well give us ground to have that suspicion of you That 's true said Madamoiselle Velzers but if you will be ruled by me let Monsieur the Marquess alone and let us endeavour to make the Chevalier as good as his word in telling us a Story which he promised last night Ah! You are in the right answered Madamoiselle de Barbisieux he told us that the attempt that was made yesternight upon his person was the consequence of a Love-intrigue he must tell us what it was With all my heart answered the Chevalier and the Story shall be no less pleasant than that of the Gascoigne Clelia At these words all held their peace and thus he began NOVEL II. The History OF THE Chevalier de Montal and Madam de Laumer IF Monsieur the Marquess hath been in great trouble for an Hypochondriack Person a fanciful Lady also was the cause that last Night I narrowly escaped being Murdered There is a certain Lady who hath a House on the Road to Marsals that would be thought the greatest Beauty of Lorrain and to have likewise the best Wit in the World As to Beauty without doubt she has her share and for a proof of that Ladies I have been in love with her and am not so bad a Judge of Beauty as to love an ugly Woman but as to her Wit you will hardly agree with her in Opinion At that time then when the King made his Expedition to Marsal one of the loveliest Princes not only of our Court but of all Europe also and I know Ladies that you are willing I should conceal his name and quality had I but nam'd him a secret that I have long kept would be sure to come to his ears by to morrow and therefore I think it not as yet convenient to see the impertinent Historian Said Madamoiselle Velzers he hath spoken but three words and yet cannot forbear to show his own vanity and affront us It is not to affront you answered the Chevalier to distrust your tongues for there was never Woman that could keep a Secret half a day And think you continued he looking on her pleasantly that had it not been for that I could have delayed till now to let you know I love you Ha ha said Madam de Moulionne to the fair Hollander there is a pretty way indeed of breaking Love and I know not how you will take it from him yet I think a Protestation made in that manner should not be received with disdain The Lady replyed Montal blushes no less for anger but the reason is because there is nothing truer than what I have said Good good said Mademoiselle de Barbisieux interrupting him no body doubts but that you spake the truth in saying you loved her and for all the bad opinion you have of Womens tongues it is far less doubted but that she also is so secret in her love for you as not to speak of it to any but make an end if you please of the History of the Lady of Marsal This Prince replied he needing a little refreshment on the Road was forced to accept of the civilities of that house And seeing she was a Woman that let no occasion slip of entertaining fancies and visions or that she was of an humour to brag of every thing she would needs perswade her Friends that the bare civilities that the Prince had shewed her were a real declaration of Love She had even the wit to make them believe that he made a halt only in her Village that he might have a pretext to speak with her All her good Gossips presently advised her not to neglect so good a Fortune They urged her to follow that lovely Prince to Marsal and recommended to her care not to be sparing in giving him encouragements Go said they Madam you know not of what consequence it may be to you and one must not make Ceremonies with Princes as with other People These brave Counsels made the Lady go to Marsal where I had the first time the honour to see and converse with her for perceiving her to be in some perplexity and that she lookt for something at Court I offered my self to wait on her whithersoever she pleased but she told me that she desired no more but to see the lovely Prince that I have been speaking of at Dinner which I procured her My Friends placed her so commodiously and so full in view that the Prince to the great satisfaction of her heart eyed only her all the time of Dinner Then it was that being her self perswaded of what she intended only to perswade others she returned home full of pride and haughtiness for her conquest The Lady who before that was proud of a crowd of Votaries who flocked daily about her from six leagues in compass thought it afterward a great disgrace to be served by Galants of their quality and there was not any not so much as her Husband whom even the bonds of Matrimony could not serve that could avoid her slights if he asked or stole any favour from her it was a kind of Treason and robbing the Publick he took to himself what only belonged to the Prince and she threatned to undoe him At that all the Company burst out in laughing There was said Madam de Moulionne a foolish creature indeed if it be not one of the foolish inventions of the Chevalier Confound me replied the Chevalier if I add one word to the Story and
if I describe not to you the humour of that Lady just as it really was Nay I have been told that she so slighted her Husband that the poor Countrey Gentleman was constrained in a great fit of Love to beat her because she would not suffer him to use her more kindly In fine she led this life two years until it pleased my destiny to make me a Companion at Hunting with Monsieur de Laumer her Husband who was come to Thoul where my Regiment lay However I knew not that she was the Wife of that Gentleman for though she had received from me at Marsal the good Office that I have told you yet I informed not my self of her name and knew her not but by sight And that made me pleasantly surprised to see her in Laumer's house when he treated me after we came from the Chase but I may likewise say that the amazement I put her then in was no less than mine own Laumer who perceived that his Lady changed colour when she saw me came familiarly and whispering me in the ear Chevalier said he be not surprised if my Wife look not favourably on you she is a Beast that uses all people so and is mad when I bring any man hither Alas answered I shrugging up my Shoulders let her look on me as she thinks fit and if she please I shall not at all eye her On the contrary said Laumer you will do me a kindness to speak to her and turning to her Wife said he entertain this Gentleman till I go and give orders for Dinner Then it was that I fell in love with that Beauty The curiosity that I had to make her change her humour which her Husband had set forth to me to be so cruel and the convenience that he gave me of being with her alone were the first causes of my love Your Husband said I to her Madam so soon as he was gone out has been telling me a strange thing of you Is it possible Madam that you give so bad usage to those whom he brings hither to adore you for to see and adore you is but one and the same thing She fetched a little sigh before she answered to that and then turning her eyes amorously towards me Sir said she If I had as great obligation to all those whom my Husband brings hither as I acknowledge my self to have to you I should not so much dislike their Company As she ended these words her Husband returned and hindered me to answer their kindness the kindness was not so great as you take it to be said Madamoiselle de Barbisieux and it might very well have admitted an explication I confess that replied he but for my part who never desire more of a Woman to make me believe my self in good terms with her and who besides had no ground to believe it was a riddle I had not failed to have thanked her by a fair declaration of Love if her Husband had not by his coming prevented me That had been very pleasant said Madamoiselle Velzers she would have certainly scratcht out his eyes Just so as she scracht them out answered he when I made that declaration three days after I sent it to her cautiously by one of my Lacqueys and received a very favourable answer As you say says Madamoiselle de Barbisieux again interrupting him ' Slife there it is still said the Chevalier plucking it out of his Pocket and you may read it if you will Madam de Moulionne took it and whilst Barbisieux looked over her Shoulders she read in it these words To Monsieur The Chevalier de Montal. YEs Sir I shall always reckon my self the happiest Woman in the World in having obtained your acquaintance and without doubt your first cares have sensibly affected me I would if it were possible abide with you always not to speak of any thing else but however I pray you entertain no love for me for that will do us both an injury Conceive who can the meaning of that answer said the Marquess it is an admirable quibble for when the Lady says that she is happy in having obtained acquaintance of the Chevaller and that his first cares have pleased her it is clear she means of the pains he took to get her in to see the Prince Dine But surely added Madam de Mulionne for one to have answered in these terms the note of the Chevaller must have been also no less ambiguous on his part How I said the Chevalier I wrote to her that I was very much obliged to her for the good reception she had given me and that if I thought that my first cares had not displeased her I should use all my Art to see her as often as I could To conclude I prayed her to be assured that she had rendered me the most amorous of all men However it be Ladies continued he what ignorance soever I might have of the meaning of that note yet it made me downright in Love And from that time I began to contrive a thousand devices to see her and I had the more reason to do so in regard her Husband grew Jealous of me and suffered me no more to come to his house That design cost me a good deal of Money at Thoul for the space of a whole Winter that she lived there with her Jealous Husband who had a fuit at Law there He would not so much as leave her alone in his house I used all colours and pretexts that I might speak with him until at length having found an occasion to tell him that she seemed to be angry because I had sollicited on their behalf that Artifice lessened a little the diffidence of her Husband Then did I disguise my self into Womans Apparel that I might go often to her Lodgings which succeeded so well with me that every time her Husband was abroad I never budged from thence But to my shame I must confess that I gained no ground upon the Lady and that after a great many ambiguous discourses and at least as many sighs as I have already spent for Madamoiselle Velzers I thought I had fallen from the Clouds when out of pity she resolved to make me her confident being she could not admit of me for a Gallant That happened in the most pleasant way imaginable for as in the height of transport I embraced her knees accusing her of cruelty for being the cause of my Death and protesting that I wished to have been the Son or Brother of the King that I might have better deserved her favours she fetched a deep sigh and giving me her hand to kiss as a signal testimony of kindness Ah! said she dear Chevalier how cruel are you to prick me in the Sore And why so Madam answered I taking what she said as meant for my self would your ather that I should dye by keeping silence Go go continued she I will no longer abuse your patience and seeing I know the
been said and it is a great cross to her The Amours of the second continued then that amiable young Lady made so great noise by the care that the Cousin had to divulge them that the Husband grew jealous and discharged his Wife ever to receive the Marquess any more into her House and that was the reason that they kept their Assignations afterward in a House without the City The Lady slipt slily out of doors by the intelligence of her Porter and Chamber-maid so soon as her Husband was gone to the Palace whither he sometimes went at Four a Clock in the Morning Yet they had not taken their measures so well one day but that the concerned Cousin who suspected their commerce discovered the Secret She had notice from her Spies that they had seen her Rival disguised in Mourning come out of her House and by the Rampart march privately to the Town-gate that the Marquess on his part had left his Chair-men at the same Gate where he ordered them to expect his return and that from thence he had hastened away on foot to the place of Assignation She lost no time and thinking that she had found the fairest occasion in the World to revenge her self on her unfaithful Lover she went immediately and awakened the Governour 's Lady of Thoulouse who as you know Ladies is Sister to the Marquess She told her that he was gone to Fight and to colour the Concern that she had in it added That he had chosen a Cousin of hers for his Second never Sister loved a Brother better than the Governour 's Lady of Thoulouse loves hers All in a fright she called immediately for her night-Gown and in that disorder running into her Husband's Chamber Alas Sir said she I am just now told that my Brother is engaged in a Quarrel and that he is gone abroad betimes this Morning with the Cousin of such a Lady who is his Second hinder them if it be possible from Fighting The Governour instantly gave Orders that Guards should be sent to all the Gates and that there should be a search made after them without the City until they were found At the Gate of Narbonne they discover'd his Chair-men with an ordinary Street Chair without their Livery-Coats which increased the suspicion Being asked where they left their Master they answered That he had commanded them to stay for him there and that he went on foot into the Suburbs The Guards divided themselves that they might pursue their enquiry and from House to House asked if any body had seen such a Marquess with some other Gentlemen pass that way At length a Countreyman said That he knew not who they meant but that he had seen a Gentleman not long ago go into a House which he shewed them The Watch entered the House and knocked at the door where the Marquess was and had upon the first noise barricado'd himself The more they prayed him to open the less he answered yet offered no violence because they believed him to be alone and that having peeped through the Key-hole they had discovered no body in the Chamber but himself Nevertheless upon his refusing to open the door and fearing that he might escape they set a Guard about the House until that the Governour should be acquainted with the matter but his Lady having prayed her Husband to take horse likewise he himself arrived at the same instant He entreated the Marquess presently to open to him and having heard a confused saying Alas Do it not we are undone if you open Brother said he I know very well you are within and that you are not alone make no resistance open and we shall take care that your business may not come to the ears of the King Here the lovely Clelia interrupted her self to tell the Ladies That Monsieur the Marquess himself could tell them better than she in what plight he found himself at that time I know nothing else said she but that he deliberated with himself very long before he made an answer However perceiving it impossible to avoid opening the door and that whether he would or not he must obey if it was still believed that he intended to escape with design to Fight he fell at length to capitulate with his Brother-in-law He told him That he did not deny but that he was there with one but that the matter was quite different from what it was believed and that he could not do him a greater diskindness than to oblige him to shew the person that was with him Brother said the Governour I promise to you that no body shall enter but my self but alas he was the person of whom the beautiful Mourner was most afraid to be seen insomuch that Monsieur the Marquess had no easie game to play however thinking to overcome the obstinacy of his troublesome Visitant by discovering to him a Secret that might engage him to withdraw without seeing the Lady No Sir said he you cannot come in but promise to leave me at liberty when I have told you who I am with I swear added he without giving him leave to answer it is with a Lady That 's no answer for me replied the Governour who began to be out of patience you will oblige me at length to make use of my Authority I command you to open this door At these words Monsieur de Riberville protested that what he said was no false pretext He swore and threatned those that had put that trick upon him telling the Governour That by endeavouring to hinder an imaginary Duel he would so soon as it was day engage him in a real one if he could but meet with the Author of that Affront In a word The poor Gentleman the Marquess used his utmost endeavours to prevent his misfortune but his eagerness and passion did but hasten it for the Governour being provoked caused the door to be broken open and entering into the Chamber by force he was much amazed when he found no body there but a masked Lady But said Montal interrupting her Was that same Governour who was so strongly prepossessed with the thought that the Marquess was gone forth to Fight satisfied to see nothing there but Coats and would not he try if there were no Breeches underneath That 's no part of the Story replied Clelia softly it is only said that all of them were in great confusion the Lady because she was discovered by Monsieur the Governour for her disguise had not concealed her Monsieur the Marquess because he had not been able to prevent the disgrace and the Governour because he had been innocently the cause of it Poor Brother said he to the Marquess I am very sensible that I have come to do you a bad office but you must both quarrel with such a Lady who came and gave my Wife notice of the Duel telling her that you had taken a Cousin of hers for your Second I should have left you in quiet had I believed
to shed Tears But said Montal being in that manner alone with a young Wife did not Master Solicitor make a little Courtship to her Alas Alas Sir answered the good little man had I offered to meddle in that she would have found me as great a Cheat in Love as her Husband was in other matters for no sincerity as to that affair can be expected from my Age. But in fine continued he next day towards the Evening we arrived at the Priory and having declared the cause of my coming I was received with great joy and respect Madam de Broyonne was Lodged in the Appartment appointed for Ladies that came there by chance and for my self I was conducted with Pomp and Ceremony into the Lodgings of the Prior where if I slept not well because of the joy that I was in I slept at least better than the new Wife who could not conjecture what was become of her Husband and wherefore he was not as yet come to the Convent The Monks being ravished that their Patron had made choice of so beautiful a Wife solaced her the best way they could and told her that he would come perhaps next morning betimes and surprize her abed which was indeed true But it was not the man we looked for it being the true Monsieur de Broyonne of Thoulouse who returned from Paris much about the same time that we came from thence and who was not a little at a stand to find himself married without knowing his Wife and that he had presented a Prior and could not remember the Person He was conducted to his pretended Wife but she knew him not nor intended to know him I was likewise brought in presence and asked by what Authority I became to be Monsieur the Prior. I shewed my writings The Bulls were true indeed but the Presentation was false and therefore they told me I was a Cheat. Some youngster Monks who loved to promote the Whipping trade said I deserved honestly to fetch a walk about the Convent and afterward to be referred to the secular Magistrate that I might serve for an example But the true Monsieur de Broyonne who well perceived by our countenances that we had been cheated saved the new married Wife and me from that affront and all our remedy was Patience And this is Ladies the story that Madam de Moulionne had a mind to laugh at once more but if ye will take my advice ye shall all go to Bed it will do you more good than all the reflexions that ye can make upon my adventure The End of the Third Book Mock-Clelia OR Madam QVIXOTE c. BOOK IV. ALL the Company followed the Counsel of little good-man Tigean The Ladies a little weary because they had not slept well the night before through their change of Bed willingly withdrew in imitation of the Judge who was already gone into his Chamber without speaking a word and the Marquess of Riberville and Chevalier de Montal did the like But next morning all met again in Madam de Moulionne's Chamber that they might consult how they were to spend that day which was one of the fairest days of Summer there was none wanting but Monsieur de Lucheres whose affairs had obliged him to be gone by break of day A hundred kind of Recreations were immediately proposed but the Company seeming puzled in their choice Mr. Tigean resolved the difficulty telling them that it was best to begin with a good Breakfast Along then said the old Judge Monsieur Tigean is in the right we shall have some little thing made ready and a glass of good Wine may give us counsel Breakfast was instantly prepared in the Hall whither all the Company went and had their mirth awakened again with their appetite but the little good-man the Solicitor would not be cheated a second time with another Glass which was offered him and wherein the Wine as one carried it to his head fell down into the foot of it A Solicitor at Law is not to be cheated twice at one time said he it is his part to catch others It is true answered Madamoiselle de Barbisieux laughing how well did you catch the Man with the Priory That 's very true said Madam de Moulionne we let pass that Story last night without lamenting Mr. Tigean's misfortune Alas Poor Mr. Tigean added she he is so honest a Man Yes I am very apt to believe what you say replied Madamoiselle de Barbisieux Oh! cried Madam de Moulionne No body doubts of it and there he stands who hath never been guilty of the least trick for the space of forty years that he hath followed his profession which is a matter hardly to be thought Ye make account to jeer my Solicitor said the Judge but it is true that without disparagement to others I never knew a more conscientious Lawyer than the little good-man Tigean and therefore it is that I love him Monsieur answered he It is only your goodness that makes you entertain so good an opinion of me That 's very well said Montal who came to joyn in the Discourse but notwithstanding the good opinion you have of him you shall see that Monsieur Tigean for all his conscience will not perhaps spare to comfort himself for the loss of his four thousand Livers at the cost of Mrs. Beffemont whom he brought back to Paris and will run the hazard of cheating her by making Love to her Good God! Sir replied briskly and pleasantly the little Man I am twice your Age and am no Courtier but for all I have said perhaps I might cheat her less than you cheat your Mistresses for all is not Gold that glisters and Women are not satisfied with words At these words the Company burst forth in laughter and left Montal for a time in some confusion because he expected no such Repartie But in fine Madam de Moulionne fearing that that Challenge of the Solicitor might draw the Chevalier into a Conversation a little too free as the matter seemed to engage him to diverted him by starting another Discourse Well then said she What shall we do to day Shall we fall to our Stories again Every body hath not obeyed the Law that we made yesterday No answered the Marquess of Riberville who till then pleasantly entertained Clelia and it is your self that is in the fault Ah! For my part replied she I know not any my Husband and I made no Love to one another before we married But Madam said the Chevalier Have you never had a Lover since you were married Saving the respect that is due to Monsieur the Judge added he drollingly your eyes were never made for the face of a Lady that should live to this time without Pretenders and if I thought that you had never had any I would from this instant become your Gallant my self even in your Husband's presence Sir replied the Judge smiling Do her not that Honour I assure you she has others
no other but the Abbot of Lauciat to whom the late Monsieur Fouquet appeared in an Alley at Tours I crave no other but my Lady Marchioness of Tessau whose Curtains he drew as she lay in bed These are persons of unquestionable credit and would not for a world tell a lie I make no doubt of that replyed Montal but have you that information from the Abbot and Marchioness or from another hand I have it onely answered Madam de Moulionne from one of their Friends but he is a man as scrupulous as they that way and would not tell a lie for all the world and he that should say otherwise would perswade me that Snow is black Ah! as to that Madam replyed the Chevalier laughing that is the thing I least of all doubt of and it is easie to be seen For all that added he I maintain that he who hath told that tale has been but in Jeast and that if the Abbot of Lauciat and Madam de Tessau were asked they would say that I had reason But according to your talk Chevalier said the Marquess interrupting him you are a man then that will not believe what is said of some Families where such kind of Apparitions are common You will not then believe what is reported of the House of Brandenburg where as often as any one of the Family is to die there appears a Spirit in form of a great Statue of white Marble representing a woman and runs all over the rooms of the Princes Palace Neither will you believe that there are two illustrious Families in France the one in Bretanie and the other in Gascoigne where some such thing happens I believe it answered Montal if you will assure me that you your self believe it But tell me a little are the Princes of Brandenburg as ancient as Lucian's Dialogues I cannot tell answered the Marquess and it is not impossible but why do you ask me that question Because I think replyed Montal I have in Lucian read the History of their Family if there were any such Ah! said Mademoiselle Velzers Jeer not Chevalier it is a thing I have heard my Father tell a hundred times yea and that a poor Page lost his life by his imprudence in attempting to hinder that Statue from coming up stairs The young Lad had so great Love for his Master that perceiving the Statue at the foot of the stairs as he was going down with some others of the Princes Servants and fearing that it was come for the Prince himself Ah! cried he wicked Spirit you come to foretell the death of my Master and forthwith gave it a sound blow which put the Spirit into so great a rage that taking hold of him but with one hand it dashed out his brains against the ground before the rest had time to perceive its design Well then these are matters of fact added the Marquess and that thing could not happen without a great many witnesses Nothing more true replyed Montal driely Lucian hath likewise made mention of it under the name of a Servant of Eucrates saving that in stead of a Page it was a Groom and that the Statue of Eucrates did not kill him that disobliged it but was satisfied onely to drub him soundly Ladies said the Marquess there is nothing to be got by disputing with this incredulous man we had better think of dining than of contesting any longer Ye are all every one of you continued Montal most ingenious persons in believing such idle fopperies I would have you know that no Spirits walk now adayes unless it be to make Husbands Cuckolds or for some other such like Intrigue After dinner I shall prove what I say by the History of one whom Mademoiselle de Barbisieux knows well for the Gallant is one of her Relations Let us dine then quickly said Mademoiselle de Barbisieux that I may hear this pretty story I shall leave you to hear it by your selves replyed the Marquess whil'st I ride to the house of Clelia's Aunt for added he I ought at least having in some manner taken upon me the care of her Niece go comfort and offer her my services if she have occasion for them An honest pretext Monsieur the Marquess said Mademoiselle de Barbisieux and we shall willingly give liberty to your love for two or three hours Ah! Madam said he the question is not now of Love and if I thought not my self obliged in civility to doe so I would not for the space of one minute leave so amiable a Company as this What you say replyed Madam de Moulionne is the highest point of civility but for all that we believe you not and it is very Just that you go see whither they have carried your heart For my part said Montal waggishly were I in the Marquess's place I would not run the risk of going amongst those where I might be suspected to be the ravisher and I should be afraid to be arrested They dined presently after and for all their railleries the Marquess took Horse after Dinner and went to the place he resolved In the mean while Mademoiselle de Barbisieux challenged the Chevaliers Prowess which he immediately performed addressing his discourse to her in these terms NOVEL XIV THE HISTORY OF The Marquess of Commorgien ABout the time that I came to Paris upon the account of my fanciful Locram-Lady which was in December last your agreeable Cousin the Marquess of Commorgien came there also and we both lodged together at the Hostel de Genlis in Dolphinstreet We had good Company there and amongst others two new-married Persons which was a thing very suteable to your Cousins humour The husband was a little stricken in years the wife young and fair the one a Block head of an ordinary Family the other witty and of great quality but small Fortune and who had onely marryed that man because he was rich After five or six dayes conversation Commorgien having made a sufficient Acquaintance with the Lady he perceived her not fully satisfied with her Destiny Her husband by reason of a little shortness of breath lay by himself and allowed her but ten pieces a month for play which was very troublesome for a great Player such as she was And to see her self tyed to an old husband who though he had not been afflicted with shortness of breath yet was still old gave her good cause to be no wayes satisfied Commorgien proved it to her also by a Sonnet which he composed the day following I have forgot it because it was very roguish onely I remember it was an ill-made piece in imitation of Petrarch and which ended with these Verses speaking of handsome women Nature has gi'n 'em store of Wit Beauty and Graces joyn'd to it In fine sh ' has gi'n 'em all she can But only hearts to love a weak old man The Chevalier looks on me as he sayes that said Madam de Moulionne interrupting him and these Verses are addressed to me but
lost sight of them Have I not illustrated the case very well said he to Mademoiselle de Barbisieux I can say nothing as to that answered she but it is certain that that same knavish Farmer was the only cause of all the disorder and to answer the great objection which Madam de Moulionne has made to me upon the Spirits sinking down against the wall when the Presidents friend thought to have catcht him I need do no more but make an end of my story The Gentleman having seen him sink down in that manner called in some people caused an instrument to be brought whereby he might sound into the place where the Ghost seemed to vanish and found there was a trap door there which shut with a bolt when one was in He went down and found the Goblin provided with good mattresses whereon he fell so soft that if he had thrown himself down headlong it would not have hurt him He made him come forth and there found that the charm which made the Spirit Pistol-proof was a skin of buff fitted to all the parts of his body The Gallant confessed all his tricks and was quitted for paying to his Master the Arrears of five years after the rate that the Land was let at before the Apparitions A more vindicative and less virtuous man than the President would have caused him to have been hang'd This Madam I assure you is true and without doubt we should not believe all that is said of Spirits and Apparitions after such a cheat as this I believe whatever you please said Madam de Moulionne but for all that I shall ever be strangely afraid of them and the very thought hath brought tears already into my eyes I very well believe you replied Mademoiselle de Barbisieux for that never fails to happen to my self who am none of the most timorous when they speak to me of Spirits I take my self to be a little stouter than you Madam said Montal and yet I cannot resist no more than any other the first impressions that such idle notions give us and it is not to be thought strange Man has not command enough over himself to change easily a habit that he hath had from a Child of quaking at the naming of Ghosts and in spight of reason the sole imagination of a terrible object is able to make the most resolute shake Yet for all that I should not forbear to keep my way in any darksom place whatsoever if my business called me that way neither should I forbear to follow any thing that might appear to me though it were with trembling that so I might be satisfied in the reality of what it appears I doubt much of that last point said Mademoiselle Velzers And so do I added Madam de Moulionne This Discourse was interrupted by the comeing of a Lacquey who brought a Letter to Mademoiselle de Barbisieux That is a pleasant Letter said Madam de Moulionne to her your eyes were very merry as you read it I confess it is answered Mademoiselle de Barbisieux and yet it ought to grieve me for the subject of it is neither more nor less than the death of one who is nearly related to a person whom I esteem Ah! Mademoiselle cried the Chevalier I guess what the matter is and if you will confess the truth you wish already the party were dead Why so answered she very carelesly I wish no bodies death The manner of your answer said Madam de Moulionne makes me also begin to guess at some thing If that person should die would not you be revenged of that Bigot of whom you promised us the History I know not Madam answered Mademoiselle de Barbisieux if you know what Bigot I intended to speak of however you may not be much mistaken In fine then said the Chevalier the good man the Marquess of Isoura will be quickly dead praised be God added he that makes way for the conclusion of our Romance one of our Heroins will be suddenly married He made Made-moiselle de Barbisieux blush when he named that good old Marquess In truth you are not so wise as you think said she to him you think that you are well acquainted with my affairs and in the mean time are wholly ignorant of them With all my ignorance Mademoiselle answered he I wish the good man were in his Grave and we had heard the History of the Bigot for now is the time to tell it and that Letter is come too opportunely to put you upon that discourse for us now to lose the occasion of hearing the relation of your Adventures I refuse not to perform what I promised replied she but he that brought me the Letter stays for an answer and I beg the Companies leave to go write it With these words she withdrew into a private Chamber whither she carried the Lacquey and the other Ladies went down with Montal into the Garden to fetch a walk whilst she wrote her Letter When they were at the end of the Grass-plot they perceived without in an Alley Company that were come also to walk there Amongst others Mademoiselle Velzers knew the Marquess of Mirestain with little Lusigny There is a man said she immediately to Madam de Moulionne shewing her the Marquess of Mirestain of whom one might tell a pretty romanting story What story answered Montal. Let us not go their way replied she lest he come and hinder me from speaking of it for it is a secret that he hath imparted to me and prayed me not to divulge They turned aside as she desired to hear it and thus she began NOVEL XVI THE HISTORY OF The Marquess of Mirestain and a fair Princess THat Gentleman who was somewhat of Kin to a young Soveraign Lady in our Neighbourhood passed one day through her Territories You see that he is handsome and well made He made Courtship to the Princess and was not disliked by her The esteem she had for him became so great that to prevent falling into some errour she was constrained to send him back into his own Country Any other but I might have a fair occasion here to speak of the tears she shed before she could bring her self to that resolution and of the conflict that passed between her Virtue and Love but that I leave to some Mademoiselle de Scudery or to the Marquess of Mirestain himself for my part I understand nothing of that He returned then into France at least as much afflicted to be separated from the Princess as she was to part from him They wrote to one another fell both sick and too much Virtue made them languish and pine away with Love In this interval the Soveraign Prince died and the Marquess believed his fortune might be bettered by that The Lady imagined also that she should not any longer indure such hard sufferings and that she might at least pursue her desires without a crime But a Monster more terrible than Virtue came to meddle in her