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A28572 Le Lutrin an heroick poem / written originally in French by Monsieur Boileau ; made English by N. O.; Lutrin. English Boileau Despréaux, Nicolas, 1636-1711.; N. O. 1682 (1682) Wing B3465; ESTC R15698 20,272 44

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his Regrett the fretting envious Elf Shall see thee thousands Bless and hang himself To see the Mighty Power of Eloquence How little short 't is of Omnipotence Sidrac's discourse had charm'd their Ears and Heart And Planet-strook the Dean stood for his part Now on the Place before a foot they stirr The Lot must tell whom Destinies preferr To this important service All pretend Both Zeal and Fitness for this Noble end The Prelate then stroaking his Milk-white Beard With Wisdom spoke with Reverence was Heard The Lot my Masters I ordain your Law From Vrn Impartial each his Fortune draw 'T was said 't was done Now all leave off their Quibling Each Mothers Son betakes himself to Scribling Full thirty Names at least in Tickets rolled Were reckon'd And that none might be cajolled William a Novice ' mongst the singing boyes Who serv'd in time of Need to make a Noise Must draw the Lots And now from fatal Bonnet Each man abides his Doom what e're comes on it Thrice had the Dean with hands lift up to Heaven Unto this Pious Work the Blessing given His holy Hand thrice shakes the fatal Cap And happy man he 's Dole who has the Hap Now William trembling to the Work Addresses Him too the bounteous Dean All-to-be-Blesses The Boy was newly shorn of ruddy Hew But when he came to 't the poore Lad look't Blew And now he draws first Brontin's Name appears Thrice happy Name to cure the Prelates fears For what less could that Thundring Name presage Than that he 'd prove The Terror of the Age All 's husht again and for the second turn The boy advanc'd his shaking hand to th' Urn When the kind fates gave out th' Auspicious Name Of John the Clockmaker A Cock o th' Game This John had been but now a jolly fellow Had yok'd himself to Nan his dear Bed-fellow This happy pair say they before their Marriage Had guilty been of some unhandsome carriage But after three years stealing secret pleasure The Priest had joyn'd their hauds at least together A third remains The Prelate takes the Urn And to play fair gives it a double turn Their fligg'ring Souls do now on Tiptoes stand 'Twixt fears and hopes for the deciding hand How blithe wast thou how Buxome and how chicket When once thy Name proclaimed by the Ticket Past all the fear of Contingent Disaster Appear'd before the face of thy great Master Boirude I mean the Sexton Some do say Thy livid Front e're while as pale as Clay Glow'd into Sanguine and thy Rosy Hew Did the Wan Sallow of thy Hide Subdue Thy Gouty Legs and Toes benumm'd before Ventur'd to cut three Capers on the Floor Now might you hear the Crowd at chearful Rates Applaud the Justice of the Gentle Fates Who by their peremptory strict commands Dispos'd the work into such able Hands Faith with the Court Dissolves all satisfi'd And to their Quarters in great Triumph hy'd The Dean alone to cool his Zeal enraged Slumber'd till a soft Supper might asswage it CANTO II. Canto 2. The ARGUMENT Forsaken Nancy in this Canto Brings ' gainst her John a Quo Warranto ' Cause he had left her in the Lurch To rear a Pulpit in the Church And under colour of Religion Courted another pretty Pigeon Now you must know that all the Blame Was laid upon the Baggage Fame Who rais'd between them the sad Squabble By forging of this Idle Fable Next you shall see in Sluggish Dress That Gallant Lady Idleness Who has more Suitors waiting on her Than the most virtuous Maid of Honour But here I almost had forgot To own the Error of our Plot The Poet laid his Scene in France But I can't tell by what Mischance He now and then dares venture over And steps as far as Deal or Dover MEan while a Hagg made up of Mouths and Ears Who prates both what and more than what she hears The Moderns call her Fame This crafty Jade Of Slandring drives an unknown subtle trade For she had got the Faculty to Brew With dubious Certain and with false things true And with such Art she her Ingredients mixed That where she pleas'd A Calumny she fixed This Baggage once in her mad Moods and Tenses Had Lombard nead the Master o' th Sentences Thence she had learn'd to spread a Lie Malicious And then to serve a Turn us'd the Officious When her light business call'd her to the Court Us'd the Jocose and lewdly ly'd in sport Her trade she practis'd first in private Letters Bespatter'd there and vilifi'd her Betters In Coffee-houses then she grew a Prater Broke off all Trades she sets up Observator A Justice once clapt her i' th' Stocks and stript her Then by a tough-back't Knave severely Whipt her Not warn'd the Brazen-face would out be flying Against the State with her Opprobrious Lying Jockey for Leasing put her to the Horning In England she was Pillory'd for Suborning A thousand pounds for False News she was fined And till she paid the fine to Gaol Confined Venturing at last on Scandalum Magnatum Two Thousand more yet still the Jade did rate 'um Thus did the Gypsey flutter up and down Through City Country Village and good Town Once at a Barbers Shop she took a Lodging But fickle in her Humour soon was trudging To th' Cross-keys Gun and Ship still her Head-Quarters Where e're she roam'd by day was the Crack-farters Forging and telling Stories with swift Wings This tale at last to Jealous Nancy brings She tells her tale I 'm sure lost nought i' th' telling How Johns misguided zeal ' gainst Vows rebelling Under a quaint pretence to set upright A Pew forsooth intends to watch that Night But the perfidious wretch intends sayes fame To Gratifie another kind of Flame For tyr'd with Lawful Love and honest Kisses He elswhere payes the Tribute of Caresses Due to his Spouse alone Easie Belief Receiv'd the News with Terrour mixt with Grief With finger in Eye and Hair about her Shoulders Poor Nan runs out thought Mad by the beholders Nor caring much whether she wrong or right him In this rude language straight begins t' Indite him Dissembling Traitor could not Faith once plighted Nor those Embraces wherein we delighted Nor thy Poor Wench ready to run a Madding Cool thy hot Cod-piece but thou must be Gadding Perfidious Wretch didst thou sit up to make A Clock or Watch some Comfort I might take And hope of Lawful gain might slake my Anguish Whilst in thy Absence I poor I did Languish But what wild Phrenzie what capricious Folly What Whimsey what Religious Melancholly What strange Conundrum's got into thy Head To leave for Rotten Pulpit thy sweet Bed Ah! whether goest my John dost Fly thy Nancy Can our delightful Nights forsake thy Fancy What! can'st with dry Eyes view my tears still Dropping See how the Stupid Block stands mute and moping If my soft Heart easie to thy Desires Hath alwayes met with Equal Flames thy fires And if
did strain To roll it o're with all his Might and Main He scarce had mov'd it O portentous wonder When from its hollow womb a Voice did Thunder Brontin starts back The Sexton lookt like Dead John with his Dear twice wisht himself in Bed But on their purpose obstinately bent They roll it or'e true Zeal will ne're relent Out flies the broad-fac'd Chorister of the Night And with her ruffling wings strikes out the Light This struck their Souls with horrible Confusion Amaz'd they stand they doubt but in conclusion As soon as Fear lent them the use of Feet Away they trudge fill'd with shame and Regret The Nave they soon recover whil'st their hair Stands bristling on their heads dissolving fear Makes their Knees quiver underneath their Bodies And there they sneaking stand like baffled Noddies Sheltred by the same Darkness brought them thither The Squadron flies at last they knew not whither So when a Jolly Crew of Truants gather Into some Nook to play their pranks together Secure of Eyes from Monitor and Master They burn the day in game and sport the faster If now by chance the Tyrants Eye doth watch 'em And unawares at Cards or Dice he catch 'em The sad surprize their Mirth and Pastime dashes And each shifts for himself to scape his lashes Such was our Warriours plight when once the Owl Sprung from the Pew set up her Doleful howl Discord who saw unseen their fowl disgrace Clapping her wings pity'd their woful case Their Spirits quail'd their Courages abated Rallies in hast the Troop disanimated Of Sidrac she th' Audacious Visage borrow'd His front she smooth'd into a smile but furrow'd His face with wrinkles deep A Truncheon strong Confirms his staggering steps thus stalks along The Marble Pavement guided by a Torch Finds out the skulking Cowards near the Porch Then with a squeaking Voice spoke fourscore years A wakes their mettle dissipates their Fears Rascals where are you what Pannick Dread does rout you Run from one paultry Owl ne're look about you Where are those boasts which late breath'd nought but Thunder Fie shall a harmless Bird disperse y' asunder How would you sneak vile Souls if at the Barr My daily sport you met with horrid Warr How would you stand a tedious Chanc'ry Hearing If poor Hobhowchin puts you in this fearing How would your hearts misgive to bide a Triall No Friend at Hand nor in your Purse a Ryall Believe me Cowards I with Grace be 't spoken Simply thô I stand here have foil'd and broken A Chapter with her Chanons Prebends Dean Nor was my Soul so Abject Base so Mean But I durst look the Proctors in their faces And scorn their proudest braves their stern Menaces I have pursu'd 'em all Asham'd confuted 'T is Persecutors cry'd out Persecuted All this I did and ten times more in sooth With the sole Breast-plate arm'd of Naked Truth The Church of old was mann'd with Gallant Spirits A Novice then confiding in the Merits Of the fam'd Good Old Cause dar'd to Defend it In formâ Pauperis and make 'em end it But this Decrepid Age to Sloath inclines Nor brings forth now such Puissant Divines Thus far howe're their Virtues imitate Let not an Owl your Courages abate Think what a Blot it draws upon your Glory How it does stain the lustre of your story If once the Chaunter learns your base Defeat Your flight Ignoble and your vile Retreat Where e're he meets you hee 'l thus fleer and flout you Heark the Owl cryes brave Souldiers look about you Then will your conscious guilt with shame upbraid you You 'l curse your slavish fears that Cowards made you Then reinforce your Spirits by preventing Th' Affronts which will be bitter in resenting Remember Sirs whose Cause your hands engages First win then bravely wear his Lawrel wages Recall your wonted worth new frights forgetting 'T is York-shire Cloath you know that shrinks i' th' wetting But I perceive success my speech doth follow Then march run fly brave Boys where dangers call you That our Great Mitred Prince may see his Engines Before th' Affront be spread taking due Vengeance This spoke the Fiend disguis'd in flash of Fire Vanisht with fresh rage did their hearts inspire Just so it was Great Conde at that battle When thy brave Arms made Rhine and Sheld to rattle Thy wings and Battle on Lens spacious Border Inclin'd to rout and lean'd to foul disorder Thy Valour firm'd the wavering Troops that day And spirited their Files with flesh arry Inspir'd new Hearts and gave 'em all New Hands Till vanquisht Victory follow'd thy Commands Thus in a moment Rage succeeded Fear And clouded courage once again shone clear They countermarch The Owl Retreats quite routed And now they scorn her whom so late they doubted Not unreveng'd for as she flew she muted In Boirude's gaping mouth triumph'd and hooted Rascally Bird said he All Face and Feather The Shame of Day the Boder of Ill Weather Dar'st thou presume profane to spice i' th' Quire And make the Pulpit A Sir-Reverence higher And Scot-free this No no I 'm not in sport I 'le trounce and bounce thee for 't i' th' Spiritual Court Where Doctors Proctors Paritors together Shann't leave upon thy Naked back one Feather I 'le make thee then for all thy Hooting sneak Like her that scap'd the Devils Arse i' th' Peak But talk's but talk Come Boyes let 's fall to action The Owl is flown the last o' th' Chanters faction The Pulpit now is heav'd into the Quire And on the Chanter's Seat advanced higher Her Rotten ledge repair'd her Joints that gaped With Planes united all was comely shaped The Wainscott eccho's to the lab'ring hammer The Roof back to the Walls resounds the Clamor The Organ-pipes provok'd with this rude Rumbling Struck up a Base and gravely fell a grumbling Now Chanter black 's thy Day thou little thinkest What work 's a brewing Sleep in Boles thou drinkest On both ears snoring after late Debauches Nor dream'st what mischief now thy Head approaches Secure thou ly'st unarm'd unwarn'd of Harms Hugging thy Dainty Doxy in thy Arms O that some friendly Ghost in Nightly Vision Would timously reveal thy sad condition Now now they heave the hateful Pulpit rearing 'T would strike thee dead wer 't thou within the Hearing Alas above thy Seat the Machine glories To have surmounted thee five lofty stories The Sexton at three strokes makes the Nail enter And now the Pulpit stands firm on its Center CANTO IV. The ARGUMENT Alas The Poëms curious Model Is Alter'd quite i' th' Poets Noddle So Nature oft for want of Tools Decrees Wise men produces Fools To tell you True my Muse and I Design'd at first the Victory To Master Dean how 't came about I cannot tell but now the Rout Is His yet so The Fancy's richer To end in Pot commence in Pitcher Such was the Project such th' Event But listen to the Argument The Chanter's Dream A Chapter called Fine