saith my God But now here is pleasure which proceeds from the breast of wisdom such pleasure as will bring profit to the soul and peace also such pleasure as will never hurt the soul but make it happy for ever What is it people take pleasure in is it not commonly in things that excel for richness for glory and delight c. Pray consider what thing more glorious can we have then to be found in the radiments of Heaven for glory for beauty for splendor for delight and comfort such are not to be found in the earth nor in the least to be equalled with it to injoy Communion with a God who is infinitely glorious so that there is none like unto our God to have an interest in a Christ who is altogether lovely and can it be exprest the good and comfort a soul in Christ is inriched withal even with joy unspeakable and full of Glory Oh what comparison can be made with the joys of heaven and those Rivers of endless pleasures which are at Christs right hand for evermore these are the pleasures which true spiritual Wisdom is accompanied with nay her paths are pleasantness and her ways are peace she leads in the wayes of God and those wayes are the wayes of peace and worldly troubles can never overcome a heavenly peace is it not a comfort to a Soul though in the midst of storms in the world to see himself at peace with God what sufferings would he think hard and too much for him to bear when he sees his Soul in a bond of peace being reconciled unto the Father by the Son even Christ Jesus This is not such a peace as the world giveth no 't is the peace of God which passeth all understandings which God is pleased to give unto his Saints alone as an earnest of eternal happiness and t was the care of our dear Saviour himself at his parting out of the world to leave his peace with us even with his own to bear them out and keep up their hearts in those tryals temptations and conflicts which they are sure to meet withal in their pilgrimage before they come to that holy Hill of Sion that heavenly Jerusalem that glorious City of which the Lamb himself is the light which being attained the recompence surely outpasses very much the labour after it here is the pleasure of a true believer in the fruition of God and here lies his comfort in being at peace with God and this can bear him up and support him though in the midst of a fiery furnace now those are the pleasures of the godly but the worldlings pleasures are of another kind the wicked deliâ—hteth himself in worâ—d iâ— vanities as if their were the greatest happiness and truly so it is to them they think not of their eternal being 〈◊〉 make provision â—or the flâ—sh â—haâ— they may 〈◊〉 the luâ—t thereof And hâ—d rather loose heaven with all the glory of it although it be a being of eternal rest rather then part with their base lusts in which they take pleasure and which they cannot keep long but may in the midst of those their pâ—easures â—e snatched away and 〈◊〉 to receive the reward of their actions in horror and eternal darkness those that had rather sin then suffer for the cause of Christ here shall assuredly suffer for their sin to all eternity he is not worthy of Christ that cannot with coâ—tenâ— parâ— wiâ—hal for him what is our all even nothing when we consider the gain we have by Christ nay what have we of our own to loose what we have is it not from the hand of our heavenly father who is the given of all goodness We â—â—ceive it and cannot he that giveth all take it aâ— again wâ—ensoever he pleaseth and if he â—hrough his infinite wisdom seem good to take hose things from us which might through our base corrupt hearts proves snares to our Souls and give unto us heavenly treasures the riches of his grace and gift of his holy spirit the true wisdom to know him who to know a right is life Eternal and having of these how great will the exchange be what cause can a Soul in such a case have to complain although he were stript of all worldly comforts surely he ought to lay his hand upon his mouth and submit unto the Lord in all things Naked came I out of my mothers womb c. Yet sometimes the Saints of God walk in heaviness under the afflicting hand of God even when the Lord hath withdrawn his quickning presence from them which made David lye sobbing under so great an oppression also all the dear Children of God have been sensible of the loss they have sustained by Gods withdrawing of his presence from them what sad cries and complaints have the church made for the same reason but will God forsake for ever no he will not for a moment I hid my face from thee but in everlasting kindness will I remember thee whom God loves he loves for ever and chastisements are but effects of his love the dearest of Gods Children may stand in need of the rod of Correction And God is pleased as a loving Father to try all waâ—es for his Childrens good he will hide his face from them that they may see the evil of their sin which hath caused them to loose the comfort of their Souls and thereby return with repentance that they receive mercy for he is a tender hearted father who looks with the eyes of compassion on his Children and will hear them when they cry unto him he will put their tears into his bottle so pretious are they in his sight he will comfort the mourner and hath pronounced him blessed O blessed be the means that brings such blessedness to the Soul that it should be taken notice of by the great God who would not be a mourner all his dayes to have such a comforter to help and succour him and who would not forsake the vain pleasures of the world to injoy those heavenly felicities and eternal pleasures which are at Christ right hand for ever more Lord give me evermore that bread and satisfie my Soul there with O see where beauty lies the Kings daughter is all glorious within there 's her beauty not laid open to the eyes of worldlings but in the sight of her well beloved alone to the world they look black and swarthy yet are they washed in the fountain of his blood hence they are declared to be without spot the world seeth not these things but the Lord is the searcher of hearts and the tryer of Reins whose eyes go through the earth and knoweth who they be whose hearts are upright before him O here is wisdom even in the knowledge of the Lord Jesus whom to know to know a rigbt is life Eternal to know God to be a wise just and merciful God to those that have his fear in their hearts who desire to walk in obedience
O how blessâ—d is that place where thou wilt dwell shall I not be kept O keep me from sin from grieving that holy spirit of grace O come sweet Sâ—viour take up thy rest here in my poor nâ—ked Soul and let my resting place be under the shadow of thy wings then shall I fear no ill for thou art my support and comfort for ever My Soul what great use mayest thou make of this great grace what singular comforts mayest thou reap from this great benefit if this grâ—at God be thy Father poor Soul here is grace indeed why then as a father pittyeth his children so he is pleased to pitty thee O he considers thy frailty and that thou art but dust therefore as a tender father who hath long waited that he might be gratious he still retaineth mercy his everlasting mercy unto those he hath been pleased to take into his everlasting Covenant Is this God thy Father O then poor Soul how greatly art thou honoured Is it no small thing in the eye of David to become the Son in Law unto an earthly King and shall it not be a great thing in thy account to be the Daughter of so great a King Ah my poor Soul hath the Lord thus honoured thee hath he iâ—dâ—ved thee with so great a Glory O then walk worthy thereof VVilt thou dishonoâ— him that gave thee breath and formed thee out of the dust to live and praise him who hath purchased thee to bâ— a peculiar one unto himself O wilt thou defile that glory by thy unworthy walking If thine earthly Father deserves that honour as is due to him by nature and the commands of God of how much more honour is thy heavenly father worthy to whom thou art beholden for thy All O then be careful my poor Soul and do not dishonor the name of thy great God is this great God thy Father then delight thy self in his presence and rejoyce in him above all for thou â—ast found through grace how sweet t is to be in the presence of thy God and Father to solace thy self in his Love O how sweet a thing it is to possess this to injoy that Communion in which thou art said to be kissed with the kisses of his Lips and made partaker of those heavenly Glories O how good is it to be in the contemplation of these eternal and transcendant beauties these glorious streams of living waters these sweet shades of everlasting comforts and to be filled with that everlasting fulness that filleth all in all O how much better is it to my Soul to be one of the meanest in thy presence to behold thy Glory then to be the greatest potentate upon Earth Let me behold thy Glory O cause thy face to shine upon me so shall all darkness be dissipated and nothing shall appear too haâ—d for me when thou hast cloathed me with thy strength O t is thy presence makes all things beautiful O t is this presence brings true comfort and gives full satisfaction to thy Soul satisfaction is not to be had in any thing below a Saviour no not in very friends they are all but fading comforts and may leave thee and forsake thee but then saith David even then the Lord took me up my heavenly father hath a greater love a pitty for me he hath said In the presence of the Fathere shall no ill come to thee the Lord will take thy drooping Soul into his banqueting house and speak peace to thee by love imbraces he will stay thee with flaggon and comfort thy love sick Soul with the choicest delights O how sweet is his fruit eaten under his shadow what comfort is it to a wearied Soul lye down under so sweet a shade to to take its rest from scorching heats storms and tempests If thâ—s great God be my Father then I will go unto him and make known my wants he can heâ—p in every condition and supply all my wâ—nts plentifully Lord I want wisdâ—m Lord I want all things but hast thou mâ—d◠〈◊〉 â—hrist to be all things for me then in giving him to me thou givest all and blessed be thy great aâ—d holy name And â—rt thou O God my Father How can iâ— be so grâ—at a priviledge belongs to me poor worâ— O let me then indeed and truly depend on thee O let my trust be in my God and suffer not my Soul to turn aside from thy commands O my poor Soul cast all thy care upon the Lord and trust in him for ever for blessed are they that trust in him at all times and who canst thou better trust thy self with then in the hands of thy Father And such a Father whose tender bowels are so great as will not suffer any thing to come nigh thee for thy hurt he knows what is best and fittest for thee a God whose pâ—wer reacheth over all the World and can bring to pass whatsoever pleaseth him O there is nothing Lord too hard for thee thou canst in one moment make thy poor servant such as thou wouldest have her to be O do so Lord for thy dear meâ—cies sake and let the glory of all return to thee Then hast thou such a God to go to as thy faâ—her in the time of need O what comfort is there for thee in any time of outward troubles when thou canst say thou art in the hands of a graâ—ious merciful God who afflicteth buâ— in measure when â—he doth afflict and that not according to what thy sins and iniquitâ—es have deserved a God that is slow to â—â—gâ—r pâ—enteous in mercy and when he doth chastise it is to separate thee from thine iniquity and make thee know in what thou hast offended him O let the end of thy chastizing hand dear Lord be such to me as may refine my Soul from all its dross then such afflictions shall be good ye good for me that keeps me in thâ— favour that cause me to find acceptance with thee Make that a great comfort to me in the greatest streight and difficulty that can come in this world he who hath all power in his own hands shall he not do whatever he pleaseth with his own yet he hath promised never to leave nor for sake them he will be still the God of those that fear him and will deliver them when they cry unto him O therefore my soul fear the Lord and let thy trust be ever more in him fear not man who hath a Linited power and shall go no further then thy Heavenly Father gives them leave they plot and devise mischief against thee and thine anointed thou seest O Lord and wilt thou not arise to plead thine own cause that they may see and be confounded every one when there councell shall be brought to nought and they made to see the greatness of the God of Jacob O Lord though we have sinned let not thy great name be poluted by those who know thee not O let that be still more glorious though
that she fell asleep in Jesus even before we were aware of it and indeed she could hardly bear the absence from her dear Lord any longer as in her last Poem you will perceive Surely by such a despised Testimony the sleepy World is condemned and every Soul tâ—at peruseth it should be provoked to take the Kingdom of Heaven by the same violence And Professors of Godliness may hereby be convinced of slightness of Spirit sinful neglects formality in duty and ordinances Love of the World decays in Grace taking up with priviledges of Saints when intimate Communion with the Lord and growth of grace is not so seriously attended to by them against which this Treatise is also a living Testimony and may be blessed of God to the quickning of them Let all such specially but remark that veâ—n and Spirit runs through their short discourses which was to prepare and keep her Soul to God to be duly calling in her own heart much in deepest humbling and â—elâ— reflexion Praying Reading Meditation being her Morning and Evening exercise highly esteeming every opportunity of enjoying the Lord accounting the feet of those beautifull that brought the good tidings having a high reverence and affection for the servants of Christ in that work and an intire love to all Saints as Saints though of different perswasions at this day in the weakness Tenderness Patience Love of the Spirit especially let me bespeak the Congregation of Christ whereof she was a Member in this City as also all the Churches of Saints to be following this Holy and pretious example and practice which seemâ—th to be ordered by a hand oâ— prâ—vidence and grace to awaken professors from the evils mentioned which I fear have overtaken many instead of their soul being kept in life and warmth and attending to spirituallity and growth in grace and being full of love and good works under the loud calls they have thereunto by the word and providences of God they are under that they may witness a good profession as they are called thereunto in the midst of a gainsaying generation Reader in a word thou maist here learn what it is to live and dye comfortably which is the great concernment before thee which the Lord in his rich grace give unto thee and bless the reading hereof for the ends for which it is published as prayeth Thy Servant for Jesus sake A. P. In the Year 1670. The Account of her early conversation O my Soul considâ—r the wonderful goodness of God revealing his free Grace and unbounded Love towards thee a poor Worm oh how wonderful is this condescention of his that thou shouldest be made an object of mercy my soul forget not his unspeakable love let it be recorded keep in remembrance thâ—se choice blessings of a loving Father bestowed so freely on me in the Lord Jesus Christ the dear Son of his Love who hath born with thee in many weaknesses iâ—firmities and ever seem'd to ovâ—rlook all corruâ—tions and set thee undeâ— his eye of pitty and compassion O let this be a means mâ—re to incite to a near closer walking with God that thou maist be born up against the wâ—les of Sâ—tan thy subtle enemy whose aim iâ— to destroy thee for ever IN the 11 Year of my Age the Lord was pleased to take away my dear Mother my Parents were very dear and tender of me and did not leave me without instructions of the things of God At that time the Lord was pleased to carry out my heart to things I then knew not For as soon as my Parents had taught me there was a God I had an awe upon my heart concerning him I could then reason with my heart and said the Lord made me and he made me to serve him and I must do it so being young the Lord was pleased in the freeness of his Grace to kindle in my heart some small sparks of affections to himself I remember on a time a little Brother of mine was sick and my Mother being very tender of her Child one Lords day would not go to Church which caused me also to stay at home but wanting employment out of my Mothers sight went to work about my babies at night the Lord was pleased to take a way the Child I standing by the Cradle which brought a fear upon me presently that I had been the cause by my working that day of the Lords anger in taking away my brother I also remember that I went out and wept bitterly in the consideration of my days work but never let my friends know it I was much troubled at it but hoped such was the ignorance of my heart that all would be well again by my praying and going to Church which I was careful to do and fearful to omâ—â— one duty which might hinder the means of my salvation and cause the Lord to be displeased with me The Ten Commandments was much upon my heart making that my only rule to walk by and was earnest with the Lord that he would help me to the daily observing and fulfilling of them for then knew there must be a greater power then my own to inable me to the performance of it also my Parents taught me in my Carechism what was my duty towards God and towards my Neighbour by my continual saying of them the Lord was pleased to work them upon my spirit and into my affections and then in mercy to take notice of me in the freeness of his Grace and tender mercy to own me in the Lord Jesus Christ whom I was ignorant of aâ— to what he had done and undergone for my soul but now I can't but admire to behold the infinite goodness and tender love of God who was then pleased to chuse me from amongst my Brethren and his own self took care of me leading me by many paths of providence passing over all my Corruptions my weaknesses and my failings caused me to find a tender hearted Father of a great and Holy God oh how sweetly hath the Lord been pleased to carry on the work of Grace in my poor unworthy Soul How exceedingly doth his Glory shine and his goodness appear in that he whâ— iâ— the high and mighty One the Great God of Heaven and Earth the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords should condescend so far as to cast his eye upon a Worm much more His love upon a distressed creature About the same year of my Age the Lord was pleased to take away my dear Mother by which I had a great loss yet knowing it was my duty to trust God at all times I laboured therefore to be content and the Lord was pleased to bear me up by considerations of his love I was in the time of my Mothers life sickly and weak subject to divers bodily infirmiâ—ies which made my Mother the more tender of me hence I was more sensible of my great loss but such was thâ— goodness of God that he was pleased then wholy to take
the Lord with tears that he would be pleased to give me a right understanding in what I could not well apprehend so gratious was the Lord at that time to give in answer to my poor request and caused me to find much sweetness and comfort in reading which before I never had found this raised up my heart to praise the Lord for his mercy towards me and gave me much comfort in that I hoped the Lord had not forgotten to be gratious but had in mercy owned himself to be my God hearing prayer and that the poor weak prayer of a wretched miserable creature who was looked upon with the eâ—e of scorn and much dispised this carried up my soul to joy in the Lord with praises to him in which I found much comfort and incouragement then did I in my heart resolve to wait upon the Lord with my poor petitions for strength till he should pâ—ease to give me a clearer evidence of his love and the true knowledge of his wayes which I desired to know above all earthly things tâ—us was the Lord pâ—eased to come in with a gratious iâ—fluence of his holy spirit whereby I received comfort from every â—ermon I â—eard for about 2 Months space But then how was my sinful and deceitful heart puffed up what thoughts did I begin to have of my self how had the Devil changed his notâ— and told my proud heart my state was now good and my graces were much increased for which I ought to be much esteemed how ready I was to do any thing which might secretly make me bethought well of by such as knew it then did I walk as one that was well principled in Religion and a great professâ—r O wicked wretch that after so much love should dare to be so careless as to let Satan steal away my heart yet the goodness of the Lord whose mercies indure for ever would not suffer me to rest in this condition but was pleased by a Sermon to make me behold my condition and search into with a single eye the subject he preached from was the 25 of Matthew the parable of the ten virgins whereby he shewed how far a carnal outward professor might be like a real Christian and yeâ— have never a dram of grace whiâ—h the Lord was pleased to fasten upon my soul making me to weigh my actions and the thoughts of my heart with the pure word of God where I â—ound much unsoundness and rottenness then was my heart east into its former sadness then was the Lord pleased to hâ—mblâ— my soul under the sence of a proud disâ—â—â—dâ—ent heart and made me to be more watchfull to my ways and apply my heart to reading and prayer which before it was much streightned in Thus did I look into the waies of some other professors where the Lord discovered to me many weaknesseâ— and failings by comparing of their wayes unto the pure word of God I saw a shortness of that Gospel spirit the whole Gospel so sweetly treats of this was a stumbling block to my soul thus was my trouble greatly increased wherein Saâ—an was very busie to destroy the comforts I had formerly had None could I find to declare my trouble so malitious was the fire brand of hell to cause several jealousies in the hearts of people what might be the cause of my trouble and as Daevid saies my humbling becaâ—e a reproach unto mâ— I cared not for company but most to be aloue in which I did contemplate the sweetness of his Divine Mercy yet desiring the Lord would ease me of my burden which I thought to be very great often should I sit and bewail my sad condition and be ready with Job to curse the day of my biâ—th yet in this my distress the Lord was pâ—eased to bring me to his feet then would I come with tears and offer up my poor supâ—licâ—tions before the Lord where I found my heart much inlarged beâ—ng affected with the love of God to sinners and carried out much upon those words call upon the Lord and he wiâ—l hear thee he is nigh unâ—o aâ—l that call upon him to deliver them ouâ— of trouble and many more sweet and seasonable Scriptures was the Lord pleased graâ—iously to bring into my remembrance and powerfully to apply unto my heart which made me go often unto the Lord and spread my condition before the Throne of his Grace having much incouragement to hope in his mercy thus did I find much comfort and sweetness in my secret communion with the Lord and found much ease in my troubles which I took aâ— gratious returns of my poor broken prayers and was much carried out to trust in him and to wâ—it upon him then could I sit and call to remembrance the mercies of old as a tender and a loving father who nourished up my poor soul which made me exceedingly admire the infinite riches of his Grace and the freeness of his love in Christ Jesus to my poor Souls which made me often cry out Lord what am I that thou shouldst take such notice of a poor creature that thou shouldest cast thine eye of love upon me though the Devil would yet be busie and often cast into my thoughts doubtful fear what was there in me should cause the Lord to pitty me and indeed I could do nothing in my self which began to increase my trouble yet I remembred it was the saying of David when my father and my Mother forsook me then the lord would look upon me this did at first revive me but then I considered David was a holy man after Gods own heart how dare I to lay claim to any thing belonged to him Thus was my base distrustful heart exercised with vaâ—iâ—â—y of temptaâ—ions by the Devil as to distrust the goodness of the Lord and to rob my soul of the comforts he was pleased many times to come in withall many times has the Lord been pleased to come in by a Sermon to my soul and as it were spake unto my present condiâ—ion but oh how dull have I been to remember and how did my unworthy walking cause those blessed truths to slip out of my mind yet was the Lord in mercy pleased to keep my heart sincere before him to plead for mercy for the Lords sake for whose sake he was gratiously pleased to continue his tender and compassionate love unto me The sweet experiences of the tender love of God to my Soul at Mrs. W. at School THen was the Lord pleased in much bounty to appear very gratious to my poor Soul and drawed out my heart much to long after the knowledge of his waies now being yet under the old way of Worship I bâ—sought the Lord truly to convince my Judgement as well as my affâ—â—ctions of the way which is of his own setting up but for a small time the Lord was pleased yet to leave me to my self that I found my self at a loss being dead and dull yet performing outward duties but with
outward appearance to frown upon his peopâ—e it seemed an hour of darkness to me my heart was troubled then was I earnest with the Lord further to â—irect me in the way that he shâ—uld choose and the Lord was pleased to shine in with some Gospel light and cause me to see a vast disproportion between a superstiâ—iouâ— way of worshipping of God and a spiâ—itual sincere way in wâ—ich spiritual Christians serve him then I said O that God would please to bring me into the Fellowship and Communion of his own peopâ—e and if he hath appointed them to suffer Oh that I might be one that he would count worthy to suffer for the name of Christ Oh how dâ—th my Soul desire to bear part in the affliction of Sion much rather then to injoy the mirth and pleasure of an earthâ—y Kingdom then did I cast my self upon the Lord and offer up my Soul to him who knows how to frame it according to his own blessed will then I said Lord hast not thou the â—earts of all creatures in thy hand and hast power to turn them into what frame soever thou pleasest bring mine into a conformity to thy blessed will O do it Lord for thy mercies sake then I made known my desires unto my friend by letter to joyn in society with that congregation whereof my friend was a member For about that time the Minister of the Parish intending to give the Sacrament preached a preparatory Sermon from 1 Cor. 11. 27 28 29. v. Shewing the sweet nature of that blessed ordinance the danger of unworthy râ—ceiveâ—s and how a Christian ought to be qualified before partaking thereof at the hearing of which I was awakened and the Lord was pleased to come in with sweet comfort and refreshments considering thâ— blessed provisiâ—n God had gratiously made for those that prepared to meeâ— him therein but I was troubled when I considered that very few or none of his Communicants were so quallified to appearance which was my great burden for I longed much to pertake of that ordinance but dared not to do it in that manner and with such persons None could I use freedom with in this matter but those who I feared would make my trouble greater but thou O God who art ever ready to help in time of neeed thou the wise counsellor wilt not be far from the Soul that truly seeks thee then I called upon the Lord who was gratiously pleased to grant an ear to my request and through the help of my friend to bâ—ing to remembrance 1 Cor. 10 16. 17. v. by which I was much establishâ—d but more when I saw the number of his Communicants whom he had examined and accepâ—ed such as was very bâ—ind igâ—orant formaâ— creatures then I came to a resolution through the bâ—essing of God to wait with patience till he should see good to open away wherein I mâ—ght injoy such ordinances in power and purity and so as I might expect Gods presence and blessing which at last he was gratiouslâ— pleased to do making that my friend an inâ—trument thereof Oh let my heart be more carried out to God with praises and put a new Song into my mouth make it my work to glory that thy great name since thou art thus pleased to own me in thy dear Son Of Recording her Experiences O My Soul thou hast found by sweet experiences how good a thing it is to wait upon the Lord let not the gratious tast of his love slip out of thy remembrance but whilst he hath given thee life improve these mercies and the talent he hath lent thee to his own glory and let the gratious workings of the Lord as he is pleased to honour thee with incomes of his love and the sweet breathings of his holy spirit recount them here in order as the Lord shall give thee leave that they may be upon record against an evil day a day of temptation for how many pretious evidences hast thou lost for want of remembring them but now O Lord help me to deal faithfully with my Soul in declaring thy power and the riches of thy Grace in the daily remembring of thy merciâ—s O cause me to see the growth of my Soul in Grace and in the knowledge of my gratious God that my â—oul may only aim at the Glory of my redâ—â—mer The Lord was thus pleased to carry on his gratious work with much pâ—wer in my poor Soul notwithstanding â—he Devils suggestions many â—earâ— c. As that my condition surely was not yet so good as I did hope it to be and to doubt whether my joy was not meer presumption but the Lord in his goodness was pleased in a little time to clear it more fully to me and cause me to seâ— by the workings of his holy Spiâ—it sweet evidences of his tender love and bâ—ought into my meditation many blessed premises which he was pleased to bless unto my Soâ—l aâ—d confirm unto me with much establishment The Lord being thus pleased by his wise Councel and his tender love thus to guide my unworthy Soul at length bâ— hiâ— gratious providence brought we to the place where the Church met though they were strangers to me yet was he pleased to cause me to find much love and tenderness and there I had that blessed opportunity to receive that sweet refreshing Ordinance which my Soul had so much longed after Blessed be his Holy name O thou my Soul since thou hast seen the gratious deâ—lings of the Lord towards thee be not thou unmindful of his praise Improve thy talent to thy Masters use lay out thy strength for God and let thy heart be carried out for ever to remember the tender and unspeakâ—ble love of thy dear Lord unless thou put thy hand to heâ—p my strength is nothing I am a poâ—r weak nothiâ—g not able to do any thing if thou shouldest once leave me never so little The Choice Discoveries of Christ to her Soul when joyned to a Church in the Lords Supper OH how was the Lord in mercy pleased to manifest his Glory and goodness to thee O my Son in this Ordinance in which he was gratiously pleased by faith to draw thee up to recive those outward elements the bread and wine as presenting the immediate body and blood of the Lord Jesus broken and shed for thy sins O thoâ— unworthy Soul how gratiously was the Lord pleased to come with power raising thee up to praise and admire the exceeding riches of his Grace in choosing thee to be partaker of so great a blessing how was he pleased to fill thee with spiritual joy at thy returning home and give thee leave to come into his presence to return him thanks with joy that he was pleased so gratiously to manifest himself unto thee poor unworthy Soul as a God hearing prayer and answering thy poor request with so much mercy which the Lord inable thee for ever to remember to his Glory thou knowest I desired to do so
thy Love run free my Soul to fill Oh leâ— the bounty of thy Love each day my Soul secure And let dear Lord thy mercies sweet to me poor worm indure So shall I tast with much delight thy blessings which are sure In them O Lord would I rejoyce as coming from the hand Of my dear Lord and Soveraign who doth all things command Let not the fulness fill my heart with pleasure and delight And take away my serious thoughts from praising thee aright O rather let me be in want then filled with loathsome Pride That will the Soul securely blind and sweetned mercies hide O let it be thy mercies still that I through grace may sing A song of praise to my Lord from whence all mercies spring Of self insufficiency HOw apt is the foolish heart of man to be puffed up with strong conceits of its own abilities and think it self something when indeed it is nothing O a monstrous piece of deceit therefore the Lord in his infinite wisdom suffers Souls to wander a little and so discovers the hearts deceitfulness that so poor creatures might go more out of themselves and see their own in abilities to any good and that they have nothing to depend on but the sure mercies of Iesus Christ have I not said with David surely I shall never be mâ—ved these sweet experiences of mercy and constraining love hath so ingaged my Soul to walk uprightly before God but I see there is no strength in me nor am I able to do any thing without fresh supplies of strengthning grace from thee therefore dear father be not far from helping thy poor worm that cries for succour from thee shall I ever give the reigns of my heart to run after the foolish pleasures of the world No not in the least there is a snare and Satan lurking to deceive therefore O Soul be watchful and dispise them all as things unworthy of thy love why they are vain and foolish but increase thou still after that greater good that Souls enamouring sweetness consisting in eternal pleasuâ—es in the most glorious Mansions of heaven where are celestial treasures and transcendant comforts Lord keep my heart from fooiish vanity And let my Soul feed ever upon thee O let my joys and comforts once again Quicken my Soul and there through grace remain O let the glory of thy grace appear To joy my Soul and to suppress my fear In sight of pretious Christ my Saviour dear Then shall I never have more cause of fear Yet t is too great a priviledge for me I have deserved naught but shame from thee Shouldest thou be just â—o mark what is amisâ— There 's nothing Lord of good dwells in my flesh T is at thy gratious footstool I woud lye To plead for mercy without which I dye Of Worldly Honour HOw poor a thing is worldly honour yet how it is hunted as if that were the chiefeli good as if the only way to make them happy were to have respect and honour from this foolish vain World poor Soul why are we so deceived with vain shadows whilst letting go the substance that Soul is truly honourabâ—e which is truly graâ—ious O how much better is it to be blessed with the least smile of Christ then to be made empress of the whole world man being in true honour understandeth not abideth not but is like the beast that perisheth soon forgetting his Maker and from whence he is tâ—ken not willing to remember that he is dust and thither he must â—eturn his heart is taken up with other things how to exceed in state in richness of attire in gallant speeches yea is there not too many who would thing it most honourable to be most vitious O how my Soul bleeds for their desperate blindness O why will you thus rebel and cause the Lord to pour forth the Vials of his Wrath upon your heads who thus prophane that holy and blessed name of the eternal glorious Majesty at whose presence Angels cover their faces and at whose voice the earth shook O what a Monster is sinful man whilst in the state of Nature But now poor Soul go not too far in searching others wayes Keep more at home unvail thy sad deceitful heart thou hast cause enough to lament and sadly bewail thy own miscarriages Is there not still rebelâ—ion harbours in thy breast O too too much many for rebelling against an earthly Prince go not unpunished but from whom dost thou revolt but from thy dear and loving father a tender hearted God who through riches of Grace looked upon thee had mercy on thee and owned thee in his dear Son the Son of his love what punishment mâ—yest thou not be thought worthy of that shouldest grieve the spirit of God who hath abounded thus in love and mercy unto thee Ah wretched soul when he hath hid it from thousands of others Surely had but the Lord been pleased to cause one of the least glimps of Glory to shine upon several of their rejected Souls they had exceeded thee in holiness of life sincerity of heart and all humble obedience they would not have had those daily failâ—ngs thou art attended with had but they tasted of that heavenly banquet that soul inriching treasure which is laid up in an eternity of Glory would they not more thirst and long O could they be satisfied without being swallowed up in Glory without that immediate possession that faith gives Heb. 11. 1. v. Would they see any thing to take delight in in this World below Christ would they not set the Lord ever before them and desire to be ever with him but what art thou and how far comest thou short in every duty but O my Lord in thee is my hope here is my comfort still for what am I without supports and supplies from thee I had fainted long ago hadst not thou by special grace upheld me and given in comforts from thy self Sure Lord it was from free love and thou hast said thy love inâ—ures for ever thou art God and therefore changeth not O therefore it is that I was not consumed long ago and since thy Grace dear Lord is still the same O let my Soul for ever trust in thee till thou shalt please to free me from this body of death in which I cannot serve thee without sin for when I would do good evil is present before me O but blessed be the Lord that there is a deliverance wrought and that by Jesus Christ and that in him I am not left without this blessed hope which being revealed in due time I shall be released and enter into my fathers joy O Heavenly joy indeed where thou shalt be for ever happy in the most glorious presence of thy Lord from whence nothing shall part thee and where thou shalt never sin more but be for ever singing HAL-LELUJAH'S to his holy Glorious Name for this then will I wait but Lord grant me help from us above to run with
Lord resisteth Oh give thy poor unworthy one more grace and keep my soul humble under the sence and feeling of thy gratious Love so shall I Lord still praise thee and whilst I live extol the riches of thy grace O to injoy this sweet communion with thy glorious self Dear Lord this is more delightful and more pretious to me then to injoy the greatest treasures upon eâ—rth how pretious is the Lord unto my soul These are the excellencies and the glorious priviledge of a regenerate soul a new creature whose heart is changed through the gratious opperation of the holy spirit the whole nature is changed the glorious Image of the Lord Jesus is râ—newed on it it is made an heir of Heaven a tempâ—e of the Holy Ghost a member of Christ Of thirsting after assurance of Heaven BLessed are they that hunger and thirst after righteousness for they shall be filled they shall be made to drink deep of the wells of Salvation they shall be filled in the mansions of eternal glory when others shall be deprived of the least crum of comfort t is he that seeks shall find and he that knocks shall have the door opened unto him seek ye first the kingdom of Heaven and the righteousness thereof and all these things shall be added unto you things of this life are but additional acts of his bounty The great and prime part of a Christians work is to make sure of Heaven and his eâ—ernall happyness hereafter O great is that goodness of the Lord how abundant his compassion his love to poor sinful man who would not have them set their hearts on such poor low things as only this world affords but a Kingdom of glory yea an everlasting Kingdom that shall never fade a kingdom in which dwelleth righteousness the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus no less then these things would the Lord have his poor people covet after the rest are but things less material and shall be given over and above these things shall be added to you O wonderful goodness Such great and glorious priviledges such promises such additional comforts Oh what is man that thou shouldest be so mindful of him or the son of man that thou shouldest thus delight to do him good Oh my soul this is the Lords doings it is the great JEHOVAH is thus pleased to stoop and condescend on terms of mercy to take poor sinful souls into his favour I and he willeth nothing less to them then an eternal weight of Glory and is not this worth seeking after O sure it is to that soul who hath had a tast of what it is su e heavenly treasures far exceed all earthly vanities then surely in proportion to the goodness of them should the desire of the â—oul be let out after them Therefore O let thy affections be set on heavenly things since it is the goodness of the Lord to thee that thou mightest â—ast that he is gratious that thou shouldest by sweet experiences find him to be faithful in whatsoever he hath promised for good unto thy soul thy poor immortal soul which without his grace had perished to all eternity O 't is for good to thee the Lord hath thus commanded thee to seek that everlasting Kingdom O t is thy soul will be the gainer and thou through grace shall one day find it so O remember my Soul thy Covenant with God in the day of thy espousal then when it was the time of love when he was pleased to put thee in the clefts of the rock Christ Jesus and then to cause his gâ—ory to pâ—sâ— before thee to make with thee an everlasting Covenant setled and sure thâ—t in the unchangeableness of his Grace shall stand for ever wer 't thou but all wayes in the contemplations of these heavenly joyes thy heart could find no time to place it self on such mean things as this poor world affords to be rich in Grace and to be heirs of Glory O how much better is it then to be incumbred with the things below to have Communion with God and to joy in the presence of thy King is far better then to be in favour with the greatest Princes upon Earth oh let my soul dear father live daily in the rich experience of this blessed truth more and more whilst my abode is here oh let me find the daily quickning of thy gratious spirit to injoy thy presence is to live in Heaven whilst here oh tâ—s thy self that makes the passage sweet to Glory oh t is the cords of thy Love that makes the soul to run with hungrings and breathings after thee that makes it love thy precepts more then its dayly food thus thou hast made me through thy grace experimentally to tast O then hide not thy face dear Lord from my soul The Loves wherewith thou hast delighted my soul goes beyond all earthly glories oh in the sence of this let my soul walk before my God in its integrity yea for this will I go unto my God and Father for daily supplies since he it is that giveth liberally Meditations of Death IS death a terror to a gâ—atious Soul what is there in it can affright thee when as the sting is gone let it put on its worse ill shapen dress it can it shall produce no harm unto thee Death shall but â—elease thee from a wretched world of misery and prefer thee to a glorious Crown of blessedness the one will make thee everlasting miserable the other eternally happy in the fruition of the fathers Love in the full free and perfect injoyment of his glorious presence unto all eternity oh then how happy how blessed a thing it is to be dissolved and be with Christ where sin shâ—ll no more haunt thee here poor soul thou canst not chuse but see thy self daily involved with sin followed with corruptions one of the worst of sinners and in that thy shame should pull thee down into the dust and make thee daily mourn in the abhorrency of thy vile self since 't is a God of so much Love that thou dost daily sin against oh wretched Soul maist thou cry out who shall deliver thee from this body of death Yet O my soul take comfort in a dying Lord and glory in the strength of him who is the God of thy salvation O let his strength be magnified in thy weakness and the riches of his grace appear more glorious in the saving of such a one thou well maist say thou art the worst of sinners and yet through grace thou canst say thou dost abhor sin dost thou delight in it no t is thy burthen and since t is so take comfort In the remembrance of him who sweetly sayes come unto me he hath taken out the sting and is become thine advocate yea and will plead thy cause through his own merit and everlasting Righteousness in which through free grace and infinit mercy he will present thee spotless before the throne of that Heavenly Grace
But since O Lord it is thy Childrens priveledge not to sin sure t is our duty to be looking up to thee for new supply of strength to be kept daily in thy fear O how blessed is the Soul whom thou shalt keep and â—each out of thy law whom thou shalt feed with the pleasant fruits of Righteousness and cause to rest under thy shaddow with much delight sure here alone is pleasure and everlasting peace to feed with the flocks of Christ and to lye down in those pleasant pastures of eternal comfort where Christ the beloved of thy soul shall preserve thee unto all eternity Of Communion of Saints O my Soul what a mercy is it to go into the presence of the Lord in the Congregation of his people to injoy Communion with thy God in the assembly of his Saints YEt if it be his pleasure by a just cause to keep thee back yet hast thou cause to hless him for ever for Jesus Chrsst that rich mercy that unspeakable goodness for that word wherein he is received unto thee O my soul through the Spirit of that infinite grace here mayest thou sollace thy self in divine Loves and fill thy self with joy hast thou but faith then may thy joy be full in Meditating of his gratious Attributes he is the Lord God All Mighty but if not so to thee what availeth thee couldest not thou say through grace this it my Lord this great God is my Father how miserable would thy condition be to have this God to be thy enemy though thou wert full of what this world could give thee of highest injoyment yet shalt thou be for ever miserable but thy God is a merciful God O it is good for thee that he is so he is a God whose Glory is his Goodness and his goodness is his glory a God who is still the same and changeth not man may be said in all he doth or saith to be but vanity as a thing from himself he being but a finite Creature but who shall gain say the great and everlasting God whose power is in and from himself he is in deed a faithful God a God that keepeth Covenant with those whom he through grace hath taken into Covenant with him self Meditations of the unchangeable Love of God THen O my soul is the Lord unchangeable is he still the same and will be so O then reâ—oyce in the rich mercies of thy everlasting God here is comfort for thee in your assureance of his love unto the end â— have made an everlasting covenant with the house of Jacob and if thou beest of the seed of Jacob this promise sure belongs to thee Jesus Christ in Testates thee in this new covenant who hath once for all offered up himself a Sacrifice the everlasting satisfaction of divine justice for those whom by the Lords gratious determinate will should have an intrest in this rich redemption O rich indâ—ed being purchased not with corruptable things but with the pretions blood of Jesus Christ that lamb of God without spot or blemish t is want of faith poor soul makes thee doubâ—ful though thou manifest as to thy self condemn thy self as one unworthy to hope for the least mercy much less to believe such rich priviledges belong to thee yet considering my soul for to thee I write thou art commanded to believe and without faith it is impossible to please God and the Lord is thus wonderfully pleased in the great condescention of his gratious Love to take it as a glory done to him from a poor creature though the good of believeing is to us the glory of the act unto the Lord who gives the power to any poor creature to believe so to believe as to see so great a Salvation in so believeing how can the soul but stand in admirations and glorifie the riches of that grace which caused the great IEHOVAH to look upon so poor a worm with such a Love Behold with what manner of Love the Father hath loved us that we even we might become the children of God heirs with and in Christ Jesus of an eternal inheritance incorruptable and full of glory and that thou mayest be filled with joy in these thy sweetest contemplations has not the Lord then pleased sometimes to evidence his gratious love to thee in Christ Jesus and therein seek thee by his gratious word with that holy Spirit of promise to be thy God and Father O he is the same God still and if he loved thee it was with an everlasting Love if he hath taken thee into covenant with himself it was to be thy Gâ—d for ever hast thou hâ—d this saving grace made sure to thee fear not but that the Lord not onely can but will preserve his own he wiâ—l assâ—â—edly fuâ—fill and â—erefect that good work he hath begun in thee was one drop of Christs Blood â—â—â—d in vainâ— was it not of power sufficient to accomplish the end for which it was shed even the bringing many Sons to glory surely the Lord shall not come short of what he hath designed the Divil may strive to pluck thee from thy God but remember that gâ—atuus â—ord of thy redeemer unto his Sheep that hear his blessed voice and follow him I give unto the eternal life and they shall never perisâ— whom the Lord hath owned neither shall any man pluck them out of mâ— hands O what a gratious priviledge is here thus to be kept by an Almighty power the power of that great God out of whose hand no man nay Satan nor any of his Instruments can ever be able to pluck thee Christ hath purchased an everlasting redempâ—ion and to those who are in him there is no condemnation O blessed and for ever blessed be the Lord for this sweet truth and fâ—r the evidâ—ncing of it in some measure to my poor unworthy soul O how good a God is our God who hath not onely stored up such rich mercies for poor worthless ones but is also please to leave it on record and wills that his poor creatures should be made happy in the knowâ—edge of this their eternal happiness O then my soul take comfort in those bleeding wounds of thy sweet Saviour yet be thou humbled for it was thy sins that pierced his tender side he knew no sin yet for thy sake became sin to bear thy punishments thou wast his enemy yet he could dye for thee to reconcile thee to himself when thou wast in thy blood a loathsome creature then pitty moved him to shew compassion to thee that thou might live he loves thee first that thou shouldest then Love him t is not thy flesh makes thee accepted but thy Saviour thou art still a soathsome lump of filthyness but by that comliness which Christ hath put upon thee thou art accepted through an intrest in him thou shalt be beautiful in the sight of thy Lord and Father this is O soul thy priviledge renew thy intrest by thy daily approach and acting faith