was but a Sham and that she was a Fool to think I ever lov'd her She left me after that and would not hear my Reply I had all imaginable Cause to think she Jilted me She had my Watch which she hastened not to return I had given her Ten Pistols and she again asked me for Fifty more But yet I was blind enough not to reflect on her Ber Behaviour She is too rich thought I to desire more than she has and her Addressing her self to me must be an Effect of Confidence she has in me I resolved then to beg the Fifty Pistols from Monsieur de Cinq Mars We were at her House when I proposed this to him I took him aside into another Room and told him trembling That I had an urgent occasion for Fifty Pistols by reason my Friends allowed me short He reply'd he would give me a Hundred and presently calling the Lady at whose House we were What Mony said he did I leave you Madam the last Time I was here Was it not Three hundred Pistols Fetch me a Hundred pray which I have a present occasion for She blushed and not daring to return any Answer brought him the Hundred Pistols which he gave me I scrupled taking them saying That perhaps she wanted them No no said he she has enough and I will have her when you want any thing to supply you and calling her he bad her give me all I should ask her for I went away keeping the Hundred Pistols in the Resolution of letting Monsieur de Cinq Mars know That I had borrowed them only for that Person of whom he had them and left him with her I was at a loss what to make of her who pretended Want of Fifty Pistols when Monsieur de Cinq Mars had so lately given her Three hundred Yet I found it pleasant enough supposing she trick'd me to see her thus punished for her Covetousness and that instead of asking her for Mony she was now to give me some as often as I should require it I could not forbear acquainting my Brother therewith who was angry that I should have borrow'd any thing of Monsieur de Cinq Mars and would have the Hundred Pistols to send them back to him He told me then That she was us'd to play such Pranks and let Monsieur de Cinq Mars give her never so much Mony she would be still asking some of all that pretended to her I have attempted continued he to convince Monsieur de Cinq Mars of it but Love blinds him and he has not Leisure to study his Mistresses Characters My Brother returned the Hundred Pistols which Monsieur de Cinq Mars would not accept but on condition that I would ask her for more whenever I had need of them My Brother who had already found how blind he was on her account thought not fitting to let him know That it was she who had obliged me to ask him for that Sum But as I had resolv'd to get my Watch and my Ten Pistols again I was also determin'd to make use of the Order Monsieur de Cinq Mars had given me and to lack for nothing I went then to see her and was not a little astonished when receiving me with a smiling Countenance Well said she and where are the Hundred Pistols Monsieur de Cinq Mars has given you are not they for me For you said I Why Faith I have spent them and far from that I must beg of you that you would supply me with Twenty more on the account of an urgent Necessity What then reply'd she you think the Three hundred Pistols Monsieur de Cinq Mars spoke of were mine You are mistaken he had given me them to keep for him and he is so covetous that he would be as mad as the Devil if I should touch a Farthing of it Alas added she with Tears in her Eyes I am an unhappy Woman Monsieur de Cinq Mars scarce allows me what is necessary and I never ask him for any thing but he upbraids me with it What my Brother had told me secured me against this Artifice I told her she misrepresented Monsieur de Cinque Mars and that I would speak to him my self to know the Truth of the Matter Then I prayed her to return me my Watch and my Ten Pistols since I had now no more Cause to doubt but the Love she Feigned was a Pretence she made use of to Chouse me Here she wept afresh begging That for God's sake I would not tell Monsieur de Cinq Mars of it Which I promised I would not But it was in vain for me to insist upon my Watch and my Ten Pistols she positively deny'd them telling me she would keep them for my sake As Angry as I was I could not forbear laughing at the Complement The more I laugh'd the more she cry'd but I had the Courage not to be mov'd with her Tears and to despise her as much as I had ever lov'd her She was indeed such as my Brother had told me tho Monsieur de Cinq Mars had lavish'd an incredible Sum of Mony on her she would be asking every Body for more She was worth Four hundred thousand Livers when Monsieur de Cinq Mars died and we shall see anon what was her Fate I avoided her House except when I was forc'd to accompany my Brother thither where he went often to meet with Monsieur de Cinq Mars and looking for another Amour I pitcht on House because the Duchess of was our Cousin and was always very obliging to me She had a very pretty Niece whose Education she took care of for she had no Child as yet She was a Maid about Sixteen or seventeen and it will easily be judg'd that a Youth of my Complexion did not see her often without telling her she was Handsome She answered my Love in such a manner as made me distracted she did nothing but laugh at it and I could not guess whether she loved me or no. One Day that she was gone out with the Duchess I went to see her and found no Body there but a young Woman that waited on her who was about Twenty and very passable I used to be civil to her as often as I saw her but finding her alone was more free of my Complements than usually She spoke to me of her Mistress who she said was passionately in Love with me but dar'd not tell me so her self She told me That if I really lov'd her she would endeavour to rid her of those Fears and to contrive how we should converse privately together I made her all the Oaths and Protestations she desired and she assured me I should shortly see her Mistress provided I would be discreet Then she gave me that Caution That I should not take any Notice of it to the young Lady till she had prepared her thereto This Conversation was scarce ended when the Duchess came back with her Niece With what
an Eye did I look on that charming Person having just before heard how well inclined she should be on my Account I took that Opportunity of assuring her That I lov'd her even to Madness and indeed I never was more passionate I found then that nothing is more capable of increasing our Passion than the thought of an equal Return The Waiting Woman was afraid I should grow impatient The very next Morning she sent me Word She had something to say to me And I went to her in a neighbouring Church She told me She had discoursed with her Mistress and that if I would come that Night to their House I might see her You may think I did not put it off but submitted my self to her Directions I waited that Evening on the Duchess who kept me to Supper And when I thought it was time to withdraw I took my Leave but instead of going out I went up into a Garret where they laid their Lumber into which the Waiting Woman lock'd me It was extream cold and I was freezing there for the space of Two Hours When that Time was expir'd which was about Midnight I heard the Door open and perceived it was the Maid who taking me by the Hand whispered to me That I should follow her I did and after many Turnings I found my self in a Chamber wherein was a Fire half out which gave not Light enough in the Room to let me see where I was She bid me warm my self and that my Mistress was coming Half a quarter of an Hour afterwards I heard one come in who without saying any thing came near to me It is you said I taking her for the Duchess's Niece I might repeat the Question often enough no answer was made This made me think that her Modesty was the cause of her Silence I therefore resolved to spend no more Time in talk In that very Moment the Door was open'd and I saw the Shape of a Man come in The Person who was come near me pushed me into the Ruel and went to him who had disturbed us I heard that Man speak very familiarly to her and she desired him very civilly to go out which he refused and answered with an Oath That he would see what was the Reason he might not be admitted With that in he comes to the Bed-side where I was and falling on me in a furious manner was very free of his Blows I returned the Complement endeavouring to get from him which occasioned some Noise Immediately I heard a great stirring in the Room over head and presently a Light enters which discover'd the Duchess her self followed by her Waiting Woman She was no sooner come into the Room but I knew him who beat me unmercifully to be a Footman that belonged to the House The Waiting Woman shewed me to the Duchess saying with Tears in her Eyes You see Madam I did not tell you a Lye and that the Knight hid himself in my Chamber with a design to ravish me I was loath to let you know it and went and desired Tom to turn him out But it was impossible for him so that I was forced to call you up The Duchess could not forbear laughing tho' she was very angry and directing her Words to me she told me These were fine Doings and that I was a pretty Fellow I was so ashamed that I could not speak one Word The Duchess sent some of her People to wait on me to the Door and I went out guessing in part the Business The Truth is That the Waiting Woman had never spoke to her Lady in my behalf and that she had only made use of her Name to have a Meeting with me her self She it was that came into the Room and did not dare to answer when I asked Is it you Whether the Footman who came afterwards had seen me or that he had used to come to that young Woman he was resolved to stay there and she finding her self in that Dilemma thought the best way to get out of it was to tell the Dutchess I was hid in the Room This had the Effect she desired she was taken for a chast Vestal and I for a Debauchee Neither did I dare to undeceive the Duchess presently because it would have prejudiced her Niece so all the Shame of that Adventure fell to my share and no one doubted but I was in Love with the Waiting Woman The Niece taxed me with it and it was in vain for me to protest I was innocent and to tell her what Hopes the Maid had given me All was to no purpose and she still believed what was most likely and took the Truths I told her for sham Excuses I was resolved not to be bubbled and seeing the Niece her self was against me I told the Dutchess the whole Truth of the Business This made her suspect the Waiting Woman's Honesty she watched her and found she had Intrigues not only with that Footman but also with several others She was turned out of Doors and the Duchess and her Niece had no other Complaint to make against me but that I should harbour such ill Thought of that young Lady as to expect what Mrs Abigal had promised me When all the Truth was out I found the Duchess and her Niece more obliging than I had done hitherto and whether they had pitied the ill Success of my Adventure or that Women have a natural Tendency to love those who have the Courage to undertake something for them I could not doubt but both had a Kindness for me But alas even that served but to give me a farther Insight into Female Inconstancy The Duchess was the first who open'd her self to me she told me plainly That having look'd upon me hitherto but as a Child she had not dar'd to let me know the secret Inclination she had for me but that after the Courage and Discretion I had expressed in the Adventure with the Waiting Woman she saw I might be relyed on and that she would have me love her But said she we must patch up your Reputation for you have the Name of a Lewd young Man and it would be ill looked upon if I should admit your frequent Visits unless you appear quite another Man than what there is cause to believe you are You are the youngest of your Family and if you will be advised by me enter into Orders I will see you shall not want Preferment Get into a Seminary I told her I was ready to obey her and indeed I was at that Time so pleased with the Thoughts of being courted by a Duchess that neither the natural Aversion I had for that Profession nor the Melancholy Reflexions I might make on the Life that is led in a Seminary could deter me from it I promised her to get some body to speak to my Mother and that very Day told my Brother of it and I found my Family very willing to let me take that Condition upon me which seemed
I had heard the fatal Blow Then I saw his Trunk out of which issued a Stream of Blood Upon which my Brother said Let us be gone the Business is over We rather dead than living were no sooner at home but we got to Bed where my Brother remained a longer Time than I did being really fallen sick upon it I had all the Reason imaginable to love my dear Brother who had been so kind to me but the Instance he then gave me of his good Nature increased the Affection I bore him He often told me Monsieur de Cinq Mars's Misfortune proceeded from the Passion he had for some Women who were the cause of his ill Conduct This and the Experience I had of the Falshood of that Sex while at Paris made me firmly resolve never to engage my self any more with them But alas there is little heed to be given to such kind of Resoutions the Love of Women is a dangerous Rock on which tho' warn'd by numberless Shipwracks yet the Spring-Tide of our Inclination will still hurry us But if I had no reason to speak well of them in my younger Days it grew ten times worse when a riper Age gave Place to a more refined and constant Passion I follow'd my Brother into Catalonia where my first Campaign made me an Eye-witness of the taking of Perpignan and the Conquest of all the Roussillon I served then in his Regiment and in some occasions convinc'd him I was no Coward for I was more daring than usual in the first Engagements a Military Life began to please me and being well read in History I fancy'd my self to tread in the Steps of Cesar or Alexander which animated my Soul with an Heroick Courage About the latter End of October we returned to Paris after the Battle of Lerida gained by the Mareschal de la Mothe He presented me to the Cardinal de Richelieu giving me all the Praise that can well be bestow'd on a young Man The Cardinal who knew my Brother and was not ignorant of his Intimacy with Monsieur de Cinq Mars told me which I understood not in what Sense to take That I had a very discreet Brother and that I should do well to follow his Example My Brother who was present making no reply he repeated over-again That I had a very discreet Brother adding That he knew him to be so And promised us all possible Favour provided we would stick to our Duty This Visit being ended I asked my Brother Why the Cardinal had insisted so much on his Discretion and he inform'd me That the Cardinal had two Days before sent for him to discourse with him about Monsieur de Cinq Mars That he seemed to him to be very much concerned on his account and had ask'd him several Questions especially For what Reason Monsieur de Cinq Mars had such an Aversion for him To which he told me he had answered That he had no knowledge of the Designs or secret Inclinations of Monsieur de Cinq Mars and the Cardinal not having appear'd satisfied with this Reply he suppos'd what he had said was by way of Reflexion This made us think the Cardinal would rather be an Enemy than a Friend to us But the Death of that Prelate which happen'd the Fourth Day of December following soon rid us of those Fears I was then Eighteen Years old we lived with my Mother who allowed us Meat Drink and Lodging but we could not oblige her to do more for us by reason she had made a Shift what by her Settlement and other Pretensions to get from us the little Estate my Father had left My Brother the Count was also with us and she had taken home my Sister who was near Thirty and had constantly refused to remain in the Convent as a Nun. My Mother had a Design to marry her to a young Officer whom she had the entire Management of It was an ill Match for her Daughter but she who had no greater Desire than to get rid of her thought it good enough provided he would but agree to it Fearing however it might sound ill that she should consent to so unequal a Marriage she endeavour'd to vindicate her self by bringing things about in such a Manner as that she might seem to have been forced to it and there I had an Instance how basely Parents seek rather their own Satisfaction than their Children's Happiness may act to their Prejudice The Way she made use of was to make People believe he had debauch'd her and to compass her Design she left them alone as long as they pleased By this means the Officer fell in Love with my Sister and endeavoured all he could to do what my Mother intended but she resisted him either out of Vertue or a want of Kindness for him Her Coyness added fresh Fuel to the Fire for he grew more Passionate and through my Mother's secret Assistance tho' not appearing in the Matter easily got into my Sister's Chamber while she was asleep My Mother having quickly Intelligence made us all be called up to surprize them together whereupon we went into the Room when my Mother without admitting any Excuses made the Officer promise He would marry her the next Day Which was done tho' my Sister swore there had nothing passed between them that might any way prejudice her Honour But she was forc'd to comply and fearing lest a Mother who was so unworthy as to expose her thus should punish her worse some other way she consented to marry a Man whom she had never any Respect for but all my Mother got by their Wedding was that she coupled two Persons together who soon became a Charge to her My Brother tho' he had no Estate besides his Commission had long since thought of getting him a Wife he lov'd and was belov'd by a Person of the first Quality The Match would have been very equal had her Parents given their Consent for tho' my Brother bore not so high a Title yet his Family was more Ancient and his own personal Merit with the honourable Post he had in the Army made him be not a little respected but he had not as yet attained to the pitch of Preferment he arrived to afterward and they judged of him then but by the smallness of his Estate That Lady was deny'd him and he resolving to be marry'd espous'd a rich Partizan's Daughter who brought him near Four hundred thousand Livers This Marriage was the making of him and he was in the Right to consider that how great soever his Desert might be he could never put himself forward without an Estate to support it The Lady whom he had courted was inrag'd at it tho' he had taken no little Pains to make her sensible That it was a Folly in him to persist in loving her She was not satisfied with his Arguments for she was obstinate and opinionated and affected to contemn Wealth and Honour as much as my Brother seem'd
told me in Italian she would gladly meet me in another Place and walk'd by so fast that I had not the leisure to reply I did not doubt but she was taken with my Phiz and flatter'd with the Thoughts that she should fancy me above a Monarch my next Care was to find out who she was and how I might speak with her I thought no Body could inform me better than the Neapolitan Lady who had made me believe she was her Rival and therefore waited on her and ask'd her Which of the King's Mistresses it was the Duke de Guise had an Inclination for She smil'd at my Question and desir'd to know why I ask'd it I reply'd it was only out of Curiosity upon which she often renew'd her Enquiry and having still return'd the same Answer Come said she you do not deal ingenuously with me I am better acquainted with your Thoughts than you imagine the Lady whose Acquaintance you so much long for is the best Friend I have I know that she loves and has spoken to you but if you are wise you will let her alone and I dare hope that as things stand between us you would not be false to me I at first deny'd she had ever spoke to me but hearing her repeat the very Words I confessed the Truth promising I would not think of her any more The Duke de Guise also told me of it seeming as well inform'd as his Mistress and advised me to improve the Opportunity assuring me that he would not traverse my Designs but since he must shortly leave Spain would freely resign her I had indeed but too great an Inclination to follow the Duke's Counsel but fearing to discover it to my Rival I seem'd to believe he rally'd and did not express any Desire of knowing her fearing he would have told the Neapolitan Lady of it whose Favour I was not willing to lose So I remain'd in my Ignorance and by the Chimera's I fram'd to my self of my Fair unknown was depriv'd of the Sweets I might have enjoy'd with my known Mistress whose Charms I thought much inferior to hers I never knew till then how fantastical a Passion Love is for tho' I had never seen her Face I doted on her more than I yet had done on any Woman I ever courted and my Desire was so much the fiercer because I knew not what it was I wish'd for My own Experience convinc'd me then That your Knight Errants running up and down the World after invisible Ladies is not the most unlikely Part of Romances since I my self little differ'd from those fabulous Heroes being wholly taken up with a Lady whose Charms I was wholly a Stranger to To make this a true Romantick Adventure the unknown Object of my Wishes sent me some Letters by which she promis'd in a short Time to rid me of my Doubts and admonish'd me in the mean while to remain constant and discreet It was very difficult for me to obey her for whenever I had receiv'd a Billet Doux my Mistress told me of it and seem'd not to be ignorant of the Contents I remain'd a quarter of a Year in this uncertainty when at last a Note was deliver'd to me to let me know that the Lady now design'd to disclose her self and that she would be that Day at the Neapolitan Lady's Tho' I was heartily vexed at her chusing that House for our Interview yet I was punctual to a Minute and then understood that the King's Mistress who had spoken to me was no other Person than my old Acquaintance Having left Naples to follow the Duke de Guise into Spain she no sooner appear'd at Court but the King fell deep in Love with her the Duke de Guise who was not over-nice in that Point had promoted their Amour and the Service he had done his Majesty therein was recompensed with his Liberty I was asham'd to own my self deceived but pretended I had discover'd the Design long ago and only conniv'd at it to see how far they would carry on the Jest. But tho' the Lady had believ'd me the Increase of my Fondness would have undeceiv'd her for adding to the Charms she really possess'd those I had attributed to my unknown Mistress I grew more passionate than ever I had been This shews that Love must still have Fancy to support it and is at the same Time a Proof that our Hearts are strangely deluded when once they yield themselves up to it I began to adore my Neapolitan afresh as if I had never courted her before and the Duke de Guise's sudden Departure deliver'd me from a dangerous Rival I was surpriz'd at the Indifferency with which they parted The Joy of returning to his native Country drown'd the Grief he should have felt at leaving a Woman who had given him such Demonstrations of her Love and she on the other hand was not sorry for the Loss of him being wholly taken up with the Glory of the illustrious Conquest she had made But what I most wonder'd at was to see how unconcernedly they talked of this Separation for the Duke plainly told her That being oblig'd to quit her he could not yield up his Pretences to a more worthy Person than my self who had besides an unquestionable Title to her Affection from what I had suffer'd for her sake which she heard with a Temper I never thought Parting Lovers could have been Masters of It is no doubt a great Felicity to enjoy such a Tranquillity of Mind But my Sincerity has always rendred my Amours unfortunate and I should certainly have been happy had I lived in those blessed Times when in Love there was more Truth and less Artifice The little good Nature she expressed in that Occasion joyn'd to the Memory of my having been so often choused by her should certainly have cur'd me of my Dotage but on the other Hand the Spanish Women live very much retir'd and I had a free Access to her besides I was very idle at Madrid and wanted Occupation But as for the great Leisure I had she soon procured me Employment by the Troubles she brought me into The Duke de Guise was scarce gone when she began to Grieve for his Absence While this Humour lasted I never had a good Word from her for she accus'd me as the Cause of his going and of her Consenting to it When I saw this I began to be angry too and made the Intriegue she had with the King a Pretext to my Displeasure saying I would have all her Heart or none So we were continually quarrelling for Three Weeks together after which she became more complaisant and gave over speaking of the absent Duke as I also did teazing her about the King But this Truce lasted not long for visiting her one Evening I found her in a great Fury and having enquir'd into the Reason she reply'd She was jealous at one of her Rivals whom the King affected better than her self It was a
went the next Day to the Merchants where I remain'd under my Disguise waiting for the Messenger's Return and accordingly a Duena came and assur'd me That if I pleas'd she would carry me to a beautiful Lady who had an earnest Desire to see me I answer'd I would readily submit to her Directions and she without replying beck'd to me that I should follow her I did and having gone through many By-Alleys we stopp'd under a low Balcony out of which the Duena having cough'd once or twice a Rope-Ladder was thrown down I was bid to get up and obey'd hastily being spurr'd on by the impatience I had to know if it really was Isabella I enter'd into the Room and by the means of a dim Light knew her to be the same She told me That tho' she had never seen me but once as I passed along the Street she had been extreamly taken with my good Mien and that the Heroick Action I had done persuaded her she might entrust me with her Reputation I could scarce be persuaded but she knew me yet speaking in a feign'd Voice as I had always done while I wore that Habit I reply'd I was very much oblig'd to her for the good Opinion she had of me but yet I could not but resent the Injury she had done to the dearest Friend I had nameing my self What then answer'd she did he tell you of it Yes Madam reply'd I and that has something abated the Esteem I had for you Ha! said she do you then know me I told her I did and that my Friend had shew'd her to me one Day as she was coming out of Church And where were you then cry'd she that I did not see you I reply'd she went by in such haste that she took no notice of her Admirers But continu'd she I was told you was gone It is true answer'd I that it is thought so some Reasons having oblig'd me to abscond but through the Desire of knowing the Woman who had disoblig'd my Friend I ventur'd abroad under a Disguise She ask'd me If I had found her so despicable a Person I assur'd her I had done Justice to her Beauty and was very sorry that so handsom a Lady should be so cruel Accuse me not of Cruelty said she you see what Hazard I run for your sake and I were undone did you inform your Friend of all this Never mistrust me Madam reply'd I but if you would oblige me let me know what reason you had to use him so ill She answer'd I was my self the Occasion of it and that ever since she had seen me she had taken an Aversion for all other Men and having no Inclination for my Friend had been glad at once to get rid of him and give her Husband a good Opinion of her Vertue I enquir'd into the Cause of her Hatred to him and she reply'd She could not fancy him that she could not tell why but she hated him as much as she lov'd me This Discourse indeed surpriz'd me to see that the same Woman who found me so unworthy of her Esteem while I was habited like a Gentleman should have such a Fondness for me under the nasty Garb of a despicable Slave But our Passions are wholly unaccountable especially those of Women My Displeasure was so great to hear my self thus despis'd that I was tempted to discover who I was and tho' I forbore it at the present I could not keep from contradicting her bad Opinion of me being as jealous of the Slave's Happiness as if it had been another This hindred me from answering Isabella's Passion as I should have done and she soon perceiv'd that my chiefest Care was to give her better Thoughts of my Friend She was so dissatisfied at it that she told me I did not deserve the Honour she did me since my Zeal was greater for my Friend than for her I perceiv'd my Error and endeavour'd to repair my Fault but she said She dar'd not trust me and if I desir'd to regain her Favour I must conceal this Adventure from my Friend and not once name him in her Presence I promis'd I would obey her and she said We must put off our farther Conversation to another Time and that I should hear from her the next Day It was very unwillingly that I parted but being forc'd to comply I return'd to my Merchant's The Reader will wonder at what I am going to relate if he considers not that Self-love and Self-conceit are still our predominant Passions I was asham'd of standing indebted to my Disguise for the Enjoyment of my Mistress and resolv'd if I was sent for any more to return in my own Cloaths In this Humour I remain'd all Day at the Merchants and the Duena being come at Night I put on my false Beard and a Vest which cover'd my other Cloaths and thus habited I follow'd her but before I got up the Ladder I left them in the Street Isabella came with eagerness to receive me and knowing me again scream'd out saying she was undone and betray'd I conjur'd her not to make any Noise and she came to her self again I see said she then that the Villain has a greater Kindness for you than me since he has reveal'd this secret to you but if you love me you will assist me in being reveng'd of that perfidious Wretch and that is the only way for you to gain my Esteem I will answer'd I when ever you please I love you above all that can be dear to me and had he a thousand Lives I would sacrifice them all to your Resentment only let me know how so base a Man can have merited a Heart you refuse me Go reply'd she and fetch me his Head and you shall see what I will do for you I smil'd at her Mistake which I thought it now Time to bring to a Conclusion and assur'd her I could not bring his Head otherwise than on my own Shoulders that I was the same who came to her the Night before and who alone deserv'd her Kindness At which she was so astonish'd that she scarce heard what I said Her Surprize being at last over she told me It was impossible and that before she could believe me she must see me in the same Habit I had then I answer'd It was no very hard Task and that I had left it under the Balcony She desir'd me to fetch it but I was scarce down e're she pull'd up the Ladder and withdrew I was surpriz'd at it and believ'd she still continu'd in the Opinion that the Slave and I were two different Persons and that I had made use of the Passion she had for him to deceive her It was so dark I could not tell where I was and being desirous to know the House I resolv'd to remain there till it was Day having first put on my false Beard and Vest but I had not waited long before I heard a Noise and saw some Men with drawn Swords in
my Brother thither and sometimes left us there being obliged to go to Court Whether my Brother was engaged elswhere or that he was unwilling to Court his Friend's Mistress he expressed little Kindness for her and when Monsieur de Cinq Mars was gone out he commonly fell asleep and left me free Leave to talk what I would to her I had not yet lost the Habit I had got to fancy that a Man must not see a Woman without making Love to her The Lady was Handsom and it may be easily imagined that having Liberty to say what I would I told her I loved her Being however desirous to do things handsomely I told her I was sorry to see Monsieur de Cinq Mars so fond of her and that she should be under such Obligations to him because I would else have taken the Freedom to make my Addresses to her You think said she he has a Kindness for me and that I am obliged to him but you are mistaken he does not love me at all and gives me no Tokens of his Passion How replied I not without Amasement then I am very ill informed for the World talks as tho' he had already bestowed above Fifty thousand Crowns upon you Well answered she and Fifty thousand Crowns there 's a mighty Business for such a Person as I am If I would oblige others as far as I have done him I should already have received three times as much Mony and be better settled I confess this Discourse seemed to me to be so singular that I could scarce forbear taxing her for so high an Ingratitude for I knew not then that a bought Mistress still thinks she is worth more than is laid out for her I would not however let her perceive the Surprize I was in It is true continued I that in respect to your Desert Fifty thousand Crowns are a small Matter But what must he expect then who has nothing and how will you accept of the Tender I design to make you of my Heart I who cannot give you a Farthing Do you think then said she that I am Mercenary and would buy my Lovers If you did love and that you are in earnest I would have more Kindness for you than for Monsieur de Cinq Mars with his Fifty thousand Crowns for continued she Whores only make a Trade of Love These Words won my very Heart and hindred the Reflexion I should have how ridiculous and extravagant it was that a Person should be so covetous as not to be satisfied with Fifty thousand Crowns and yet pretend to Generosity but I was charmed with it as tho' she had been sincere in what she spoke I fancy'd my self a Man of greater Merit than Monsieur de Cinq Mars and carryed my Folly so far as to think that a Girl so well equipp'd as she was might not only love me without any Interest but might give me some more substantial Proofs of her Affection For I was then very bare of Mony and found that I should love that Woman most whom there was most to be got by I told her That I was wonderfully taken with her generous Temper and that she ought not to doubt of my Sincerity The Answer she made me persuaded me I was beloved by her and she assured me That I should be Welcom when ever I should visit her and that no Body should disturb us I desired a Meeting the next Day at Ten in the Morning and she gave her Consent thereto I left her so transported with my good Fortune that I could scarce forbear acquainting my Brother with it I could not as we returned home leave off talking of her to him and that with such an Earnestness as made him laugh I think said he you are in Love with her I should answered I be rich enough to gratifie her before I might pretend to that This made my Brother laugh extravagantly and especially when I told him That none but Monsieur de Cinq Mars must attempt to gain her Affection and I have thought since that he must have known her for what she was I expected with Impatience that the Clock should strike the appointed Hour when I received a Note from her wherein she acquainted me That an unexpected Business was fallen out which obliged her to go forth early and that wanting a Watch all her 's being at the Watch-maker's she desir'd me to send her one she had seen in my Hands the Day before I had one indeed which was tolerably pretty which I sent her with a most passionate Letter begging She would remember her Promise against that Afternoon I was eager to be with her and found her undrest and saw no Sign of her going out that Day She had Two of her Friends with her who she told me had kept her at Home till then adding She must go out within a quarter of an Hour to procure Ten Pistols having lost as much at Play I do not ask you for them said she since you have told me You had no Mony She spoke those last Words so dry that I thought she meant to upbraid me with it That struck me to the Heart and I resolved to get her Ten Pistols whatever it cost me I left her and went and sold a small Diamond I had and brought her the Mony She expressed an excessive Joy thereat and told me What she did was rather to try me than any need she had of them She promised to meet me the next Day but when the Time was come I had a Message That she was heartily vexed she could not see me Monsieur de Cinq Mars having sent her Word he was coming to her I was mad at these Disappointments The next Day was not more favourable to me and she fooled me thus for a Fortnight together finding still some new Excuse to disingage her self That Time being expired she sent me Word to meet her at a certain Church to which she came and where I went to speak with her She expressed much concern that she could not contrive it so that I should see her at her House but said My frequent Visits had been taken notice of and that we must of necessity meet at some other Place But she said That was not her greatest Pain for what troubled her most was That Monsieur de Cinq Mars having given her Fifty Pistols to buy her a Gown she had no more Wit than to engage her self at Play that she dar'd not tell him she had lost them and must make 'em up some way or other Do you think said she that if you pretended you wanted that Mony and should ask Monsieur de Cinq Mars for it he would deny you I told her I dared not propose any such thing to him not only because I was averse to borrowing of any one but also that for some Reasons of great concern to me I must not lose Monsieur de Cinq Mars's good Opinion She reply'd angrily That this