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A64162 The conversion, confession, contrition, comming to himselfe, & advice, of a mis-led, ill-bred, rebellious round-head which is very fitting to be read to such as weare short haire, and long eares, or desire eares long / written by John Taylor. Taylor, John, 1580-1653. 1643 (1643) Wing T444; ESTC R1357 11,175 17

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streets O brave Rogues so that the Widdow Hall who was owneresse of the house was faine to have a new Signe made at her owne charge and verily this was then me thought very pretty foolish witty Roguish pastime Indeed we were all so infused or enthusiasmed with the Babilonian Confusion of Amsterdamnable Religions and opinions that we could never be quiet till we had brought our selves unto the slavery of the Rotter-dam'd excise for we had wisely considered that Forraigne Nations with all their strength and policies could never invade or overcome us therefore we thought it honourable to imitate Aiax for as none but Aiax had the glory to kill Aiax so none but Englishmen shall be famous for ruinating England much like the pretty Bird called a Viper who as it is related by Gesur doth murther his Mother by gnawing a passage out of her womb into the world Besides we were infected with the heresie of the Counsellors of Benadad King of Syria 1. King 20 23. That God was the God of the Hills and therefore we alwayes ranne to the Hills and skulk'd in woods and hedges like Theeves and Bandittes for we never durst to shew our selves against the Kings Forces in the Plaines nor once abide the hazzard of a faire pitchd field and yet for all these poor shifts and tricks it hath alwayes been our good fortune to be beaten and to runne away to London and there we patchd up our Rebellious Cowardly disasters with victorious Lies in Pamphlets and Lectures not worth pence a piece As concerning the four Cardinall Vertues Iustice being one one truly said there was more Iustice in Hell then in the Close Committee for said he in Hell there are none punishd but bad men such as are prophane Atheists Schismatiques Rebells Traitors Thieves Cheators but these learned Thebans do afflict imprison murder and torment none but good men such as are true Protestants Loyall Subjects and such as have a care and conscience to live in Gods feare that by so living they may most happily dye in his favour And another of our owne Tribe being demanded more mony to spin out the Cause he was so bold to tell the Publican tax and toll gatherers that they who set them on worke were more uncharitable then the Devill for which words he was brought before the Tribunall of the Magnificent Almighty Committee and being examined he confest he spake the words and would prove that the Devill had more Charity then they for the Devill did first bereave or take away Iobs Children before he took away his goods but they did pill poll and take from him all his goods and livelyhood and left him his Children to be starv'd for they had squeezd and draind him to the last drop and left him nothing to buy bread to put in his Childrens heads and just so much is their universall Charity And whereas at the first they Rebelled most Gloriously with Gold and Silver cursed contributions now they are descended to that humble degree of Treason that they make shift to Botch and Peece out their wicked designes with Goods and Chattells and with the sale of all manner of Houshold-stuffes from the Altitude of the most stately Arras or Tapistery hangings to the low descent and profundity of the Cole-house or House of office and in Imitation of the Emperour Vespatian who made mony by the sale or Custome of Vrine so they have out of the profit of plundered Pispots and Close-stooles made a stinking stirre all over this afflicted Kingdome insomuch that he is worthy to be accounted a Witch or a cunning Man that can tell us before hand what will be their next shift Milo the Crotinian or Creatan was famous for strength and a good stomack for it is reported that he brought up a Bull Calfe and every day would lift and carry the say Beast by which daily exercise and practise he could carry him when he was grown to be a Bull and that he killd the said Bull with a blow with his Fist and eat him up every bit in one day and one Nicholas Wood a great eater in Kent would eat up a Hogge or a Sheep of Twenty shillings price at one meale these Monsters were and are famous in memory for having good stroakes in the Mouth some are remembred for Lascivious Luxury us Heliogabalus some for drinking as Alexander some for Pride as Tarquin c. but we shall ever stand upon Record for the most unmatchable Renowned Rebells that ever liv'd in any Age or Nation Iack Straw Watt Tyler Iack Cade Lambert Simuel Perkin Warbeck and all the Rabble of such fellowes never came neer us in Impiety and Treachery for they did never spoyle and demolish Churche and Church ornaments as we have done and it is worthy of a most Regarding Consideration that His Majesties forces wheresoever they have come have not any way used any Prophanation or I●reverent demeanor towards any Church Chappell or House that hath been consecrated or dedicated to the Service and Honour of God So that the Turkes Pagans and Infidels would have shewed more Civility and lesse Barbarous savage Brutishnesse then we have done I tell you plainly and most truly certify you my too much wicked and misconstruing Brethren that I was perswaded in my Conscience as many Knaves and Fooles have been that the King was enclined towards the Romish Religion but since the eyes of my mind are open and that I hold it a slandering unreverend and Traiterous aspersion to say or think that either Queen Elizabeth or King Iames of ever blessed memories were Papists or did allow or tolerate any Popish doctrine and that now finding that my most Gratious King CHARLES hath alwaies been is and will be till His earthly Period a most constant defender of the true Faith as those two His Royall Predecessors were and as His inviolable Oathes and Protestations doe confirme and farther as his unparalleld life and conversation justifies for in all the Towns Congregations Churches and Chappels which have been and are under His Majesties command there was never seen or heard any one Masse to be said much lesse to be allowed or connived at Therefore I boldly doe give all those malitious ignorant Villaines the Lye which Lye without repentance will sink them to their Father of Lies and therefore I pray you to examine what mischiefes have been committed by our unmannerly base mistakes feares and causelesse Iealousies once more humbly returne from the common Road-way that leads to inevitable destruction let us no more believe any Capcase Candlecase Fiddlecase prating Lecturer let us no longer be gulld with false Pamphlets and abominable Lying Diurnalls who are all as full of Lyes as the writers of them are of Sin for I have seen some of those famous Devisers and Writers of Weekly newes that are so free and guiltlesse of shifting that they hold a clean shirt odious and quite out of fashion and halfe a Breech with a Doublet one