she 's a little past the years of being dandled and kist out of her Reason He or any man else any Tooth good Barber with Honour and Estate may go far with her but Demonstration is the only Argument that must carry her Cause As many years as she has lived or at least past for a Maid she is not so hard set but she can tarry till Substantial Testimony as far off as Norfolk lies can make out the Lands and Tenements before she consents to an Inclosure Our Spark therefore put to his last Trumps finds this last a craggier and more difficult Enterprize than any he had ever yet encountred however thinking it a very great scandal to his Wit to lie down before her and shamefully for want of Ammunition be forced to raise the Siege he sets all his Brains at work for one last Mine to blow her up or if that take not he is resolved to quit the Field In a day or two after he begins to be Melancholly and indisposed during this fit he is very cold in his Love and applies him to Religious Books talks much of very odd Dreams he has had till at last he takes his Bed Physitians are sent for whether they found any real indications of sickness or no or acquiesced to his own Declaration of the Pains he felt no Medicinal Application was wanting His Distemper increasing he desires a Man of Law to be sent for accordingly a Scrivener of the Town is called who draws up his Will in which he gives away about Three Thousand pounds in several Legacies leaving his Nephew his full and sole Executor The Will is sealed up and delivered to his Man Tom and all the cognizance taken of his Mistress is only 10 l. to buy her Mourning Next a Man of God is sent for and all the necessary preparations for a Man of another World are made His Conscience setled and his Viaticum for his long Journey most devoutly furnisht But it pleases Fate or the Sick man rather in some few days after to give some small symptoms of amendment and to shorten the matter in Eight or Ten days time he is pretty well recovered and the next talk is of fancying his own Native Norfolk Air for perfecting his Health all this while the young Damfel who tho not call'd to the Will-making knew all the Contents of it and finding from all hands the great uprightness and devotion of her humble Servant could not fancy that so much Religion and Piety could be an Impostor and therefore she doubted not in the least but the Estate in Norfolk was unquestionable and tho indeed her Prudence would still incline her to a full inquiry and satisfactory account yet 't is now too late her cooling Admirer talks of speeding to London and tho he professes he will leave his heart behind with her She is afraid that new Faces and better Fortunes will soon shake her hold there and therefore taking her Pillow upon the business she resolves not to slip so favourable an opportunity but to lay hold of the serelock and take a good offer whilst she may have it For with all her natural Pride she considers her self but the Lees of a Tap and 't is not every Rich Gudgeon will bite at a Bait so blown and so stale Her departing Lover still pressing for his Journey the good-natur'd Girl watches the next amorous sally of her Gallant and takes him at his word and without asking advice thinks her own wit sufficient and in two days time enters into for better for worse The Town-Bells soon rung All Joy and the best Hogshead in Daddy 's Cellar run Claret His Honourable Guest and Son-in-Law was the little Idol of all the Virgins of the Town and the envied preferment of sweet Mrs. Betty had fill'd all Tongues and scarce a Prayer offered up for a Husband but Mrs. Betty's felicity was made the Pattern of their Devotion But now as the Devil would have it our dignified Bride is for having her Dear Spouse by all means doing her and her Father the honour of staying out the whole Bathe Season now coming on amongst 'em and nothing can divert her from that resolution This is a very unwelcome proposal for the multitude of Faces from all quarters of the Kingdom may not only be very dangerous to his circumstances but likewise his Norfolk Abilities long before that time may be examin'd too narrowly and therefore not being able to make any harsh refusal of his fair Brides request lest it should look like design and to marry a young Girl and be a shamed of her parentage would appear so unkind that he has no Artifice to wean her from Bathe and drill her out of Town but by pretending a small relapse of his Indisposition which he acted so well that he denied himself the very pleasures of Love and fell off even from Family-Duties This Curtain-failure began to moderate her passion for staying at Bathe for her tame Bedfellow still preaching up the virtues of his own Native Norfolk Air his poor defeated Bride could not but have a womanly longing for so necessary a Restorative and thereupon for so important a Medicine to her feeble Yokemate she consented to go along with him All her fine Cloaths were Boxed up together with several Bed and Table-Linnen c. for she had pretty good Moveables all the Legacies of Deceased Aunts and Grannies and other good Kin and all sent by her Man Tom to the Carriers and two days after places took in the flying Coach for their speeding to London But one main thing was almost forgotten She had call'd in her Portion which for a Guinies Gratification the Scrivener had ready at an Hours warning having at that time some other peoples Money by him undisposed and hers being out upon Mortgage the Owners were very well pleas'd to make an Exchange upon the same security This Money was not to be trusted by the Waggon but to be carryed up with her in the Coach-box for which her Man Tom beg'd her acceptance of a little Gilt leather'd Trunk that happen'd to be just small enough to go into the Coach-box The Day of setting out being the Morrow her thoughtful Spouse had nicely consider'd that the Coach would be in London half a day before the Carrier which for some Reasons you 'll find in the sequel was not altogether for his convenience and therefore he made a shift to put off the Journey till next Coach-day Against that time the Gilt-leather'd Trunk and the Key to it was deliver'd her tho' by the by he had got two Keys and the 80 l. some Broad pieces a Caudle-Cup half a dozen of Silver Spoons and some other Toys were all stowed in it and the Kind Couple are trundling away for London with the Man well mounted riding by Now as a Man of his Estate he had freely given her all her own Portion a small Privy Purse to buy her Pins with having Mirryed her
THE Notorious Impostor OR THE HISTORY OF THE LIFE OF William Morrell alias Bowyer c. THIS Famous Rover from the Multitude of his Titles to begin with his right Name William Morrell was by Profession a Chyrurgion and more than twenty Years ago for many Years together a Practitioner of good Credit in Banbury where his Industry honestly got him by his Practice near two Hundred a Year with which he maintained himself his Wife and Family very handsomely till about eighteen Years ago he began to be very Lazy and much addicted to hanker after the Conversation of the Gentry thereabouts and being a Person very Facetious and his Company not disacceptable he screwed himself into the Society of the best Quality round about and would be a Month or two a Guest at several Great Mens Houses more particularly he some time since insinuated himself into the Favor of a Worthy Gentleman near Banbury viz. Humphry Wickham of Swakely Esq whose Person and Character he pretended to represent and in which Imposture he made his last Exit But to begin our History in order From his Conversing with Gentlemen and Herding with Quality Business began to fall off His many Rambles from home soon made his Practice flag when the Glass and the Bottle came into play the Salvatory and Playster-box went out And his Patients could not well stay for the Setting of a Broken Limb or Tenting a Green Wound till our Esculapius was to be called the Lord knows where and found the Devil knows when This Trade continuing the other fell to decay till at last Poverty began to peep in at his Window and Duns to hover about his Door In these little Exigencies and Necessities for the Gentleman's Tables abroad would not fill the Bellies at home nor would Hunting or Hawking pay Landlords Rent his Wants put him upon Shifts and Artifices for his Subsistence and what with a Natural Wit and a pretty large Talent of Confidence the pressing Hand of Fortune threw him upon several Tricks and Frauds to hold his Head above-board But not to trouble you with any of his lesser Diminitive Exploits the Infancy and Nonage of his Activity we do not think fit to treat you with these pettier Adventures but e'en set out in one of his noblest Atchievements and paint our new Guzman in some of his boldest and fairest Colours Accordingly he Equips himself with a Sturdy Young Country Fellow a Ralpho to our Hudibras and takes a Knight-Errantry one day to a Fair at Brayls in Warwickshire his Habit between a Grazier and a plain Country Gentleman where Santering about with his Man Tom for so his Squire was titled at last spying a Knot of good likely Kine near a Score of them Ah Master says Tom what a parcel of brave Cattle are these Ay Tom replies the Master I am sorry I saw them no sooner these would do my Business to a T but as the Devil and ill Luck would have it I have laid out my whole Stock already and so I 'll e'en set my Heart at Rest The Country Fellow the Owner of the Cattle seeing a Gentleman of his honest Appearance surveying his Beasts and hearing every word that pass'd between the Man and Master for they took care to talk loud enough to be heard thought he had got a good Chapman and desired the Gentleman to draw nearer and handle the Cattle Handle answers Tom what for You know Sir you have laid out all your Money already and what should we handle Cattle unless we had Cole to buy ' em I confess they are for your Turn above any I have zeen in the whole Vair but that 's nothing the Money Master the Money The Money replies the Country-man Troth that shall make no Difference nor break Squares between us if you and I can agree the Cattle are at your Service I suppose you are some honest Gentleman hereabouts and the Money will do my work next Market-day Pray what may I call your Name My Name is Walters replies our Cattle-Merchant Walters Master answers our Country-man What any Relation to his Worship the Noble Sir William Walters Ay Friend a small Relation a Brother of his A Brother of Sir William ' s Off goes the Country-man's Bonnet at the next word and a long Scrape made for no Respect was too great for a Brother to a Person of such eminent Quality My Cattle Noble Squire Ay with all my Heart In short after much ado to make the Country-man be covered before him he fell to treat about the Price of the Cattle in which he bargained so warily that they had almost parted for a single Shilling in a Dispute between them But at last the Bargain and Sale concluded Tom is commanded to drive home the Cattle the Money to be paid next Market-day and the Country-man has the Honor to drink a Pot at parting with his Worshipful Chapman our Sir William's Brother This Feat performed he takes a walk round the Fair and picks up a pretty Country Girl a Masons Daughter at a small Town about four Miles off and gives her the common Country Civility of a Fair viz. a Glass of White-wine and Sugar During this Entertainment of our young Damsel he is most desperately smitten with her Beauty insomuch that our Inamorato must wait upon her home to her Father's House nothing but Death and Despair attending if he cannot have that extraordinary Happiness The Girl who by this time had learnt his Name and Quality was not a little confounded at the pressing Importunities of a Person of his Worth to a poor Girl of her little Capacity and notwithstanding her modest Refusals felt a secret Pride from so kind an offer and at last accepted of his Service home No sooner was she got safe handed home and Mother and Daddy were privately whispered what Honor they received from such a Visitant the best the House could afford was not good enough for him after the courser Compliments of Lord Sir such a Person of Quality under our poor Roof and the like the best welcome that could be made him was not wanting Nay for what was deficient at home the whole Neighborhood was Ransakt to lend help toward the Accommodation Our new Lover not to baulk a good Cause openly Professes no less than honourable Matrimonial Affection to his dear Conqueror Estate he wants none and Portion or Quality are below his Consideration the Satisfaction of Love is the only thing in the World he resolves to gratifie The Father and mother are much astonish'd at such an Addressor to their Daughter nor is the Daughter her self a little surprized at it though of the two her Wonder is the least for her Sexes natural Frailty was so apt to make her think it the pure Effect of her own sweet Face that the power of her Charms and the Quality of her Captive was not altogether she fancied so extraordinary an Adventure In fine Our passionate Admirer pushes on his suit with
ramble Westward where meeting with no Adventure worth recital in some small time he gets to Ludlow There taking up the first Night at an Inn his Garb though unattended by Servants soon made him good Reception his first enquiry was to learn out the Eminentest People in the Town of which being readily inform'd by the Drawers he learnt amongst other Relations that there was a Substantial Wealthy Tradesman had two pretty Marriageable Daughters Being directed to the House he addresses to the Father telling him he was a Barkshire Gentleman and intending to make some small abode in Ludlow he did not think fit to continue in a Publick House but would gladly gain admission to some private Family The Tradesman whose name we will not mention being a Widower and taken with the manner of his Discourse kindly invited him to his own House which our Travelling Gallant as kindly embracing Accommodation was made and he was lodged that very Night at this private Landlords His entrance here gave him the opportunity of daily conversing with no mean wit and charms in the two sweet Daughters of the Family and our Gallant very apt to take fire at but a small matter of Beauty especially with a Portion at the Tail of it felt no little wamblings at the extraordinary accomplishments of the elder somewhat the sweeter Creature But this new Adventure was not an enterprise so easie as the last this Sire of some fashion was so far above the Education and Extract of his former Father-in-Law a Man of Mortar and Trowel and his Daughters of a reach and understanding so much beyond the others humbler capacity that measures must be quite alter'd here from those that he took before Accordingly now his discourse was always upon Foreign subjects himself and his own affairs the least part of his talk and if any inquisitive question either by Father or Daughters were made relating to his Family or Concerns he answered with that Modesty and almost silence to all demands of that kind that he left their curiosity still in the dark and which indeed was so much a heightning to the favourable imaginations they had conceived of him that they doubted not in the least but he was of eminent Quality and what any boasting Vanity would have made 'em rather suspect his Modesty on the contrary confirm'd 'T was some few days before they inquired his name for which he had ready at his Tongue 's end the name of a very great Family in Barkshire but not descending to particulars the remoteness of the place did not gain 'em much intelligence of his Quality from only the bare name All this while at some little distance he dropt a great many complaisant words to the elder Sister which look'd very much like Love and which he indeed desired should be so interpreted In this Conversation now of a Fortnights continuance he had rendred himself so acceptable to the whole Family that a great many favourable thoughts on all sides inclined towards him The Address to the Daughter at last looked a little more plain and barefac'd and at that time a Fair happening at Ludlow where he had been diverting himself with seeing of Fashions he came home in much Concern and some kind of Passion much greater than hitherto they had at any time seen from him Certainly there is no place in the world says he passionately so retir'd but some Devil or other will still find out and haunt me The odness of this expression invited the elder Sister to ask him what he meant Why truly Madam he replied I have been hunted from three or four Towns already for in spight of all my resolutions of living incognito some unlucky Person or other comes full in my mouth and will betray me in splght of my Soul This answer did but heighten her Curiosity and having as she thought some little Interest in him as a profest Servant of hers she was a little the bolder in pressing the Question and therefore plainly ask'd him why he liv'd incognito and what accident had now discovered him To this at last with a little more frankness than he had hitherto used he replied the reason of his Ramble from his Family with his Living three or four Months past unknown to the whole World was only to prevent the ruine of a Sister who like a foolish Girl was in much danger to be undone by a Beggerly Match she was too fond of and her Portion being in his hands he had absented himself from his home lest the softness of her tears the importunities of several Advocate 's in behalf of this indigent Lover together with the weakness of his own tender heart might at last be prevail'd upon to grant his consent to what he knew would be his shame and her undoing And as ill luck would have it he had unfortunately tumbled upon a Countryman of his now at the Fair who would infallibly run open mouth'd to his Sister and his Family and tell 'em all where he was This discovery gave a good occasion to the fair Examiner to be not only a Pleader for her own Sex in the Person and cause of his unknown Sister but likewise to be a Champion for Love For now she plainly told him that a great many grains of allowance were to be made where hearts were inseparable If this Lover of his Sisters was a man of Sense and Quality as neither of those he could deny him it was a little barbarous in him to oppose the whole Repose and Contentment of so near a Relation as a Sister for so sordid a consideration as a little Worldly Interest Besides there was a Providence always attended Faith and Truth in Love and undoubtedly sooner or later would provide for their well-being or else enable 'em to bear a meaner portion of Riches which others perhaps might less contentedly possess This argument was almost the daily discourse in which she seem'd to gain some little ground but not enough to perswade him to the unreasonable Grant of his Sisters desires About five days after comes a Letter directed to him at Ludlow with the Post Mark upon it very authentically which in a very legible Woman's hand contained these words Dear Brother WHat unhappy Star am I born under to suffer all this miserable Persecution Certainly when my Father left me to your disposal and tied my Portion to your liking of the man that must marry me surely he could never have died reconciled to Heaven could he have foreseen the Slavery he tied his poor Child to in putting me into the power of so cruel a Brother To run so many Months from your House your Family nay your Honour too for what must the censuring world talk of you and all to break a poor Sister's Heart Oh shameful to hide your self from the World and run from Mankind only to shut your Ears against Justice and to be deaf to all Goodness and Humanity Alas what Capital Crime have I committed who only
only for Beauty and much disdaining the addition of so small a sum to his plentiful Fortune The first stage being done for they had but one Night to lye by the way the small Cabinet of Treasure was carefully taken out of the Coach and lodged in a Closet in the Chamber and next Morning deliver'd to Tom to see safely laid in the Coach-box as before The next Night arriving both at London whither Tom about Brenford was commanded by his Master to speed a little before to prepare for their Reception a very fair Lodging near St. James's was ready to entertain her but no Tom had been there and coming to open the Trunk instead of the Gold and Silver Entrayls there was nothing but a Bag of Stones and a piece of a Brickbat to supply their places enclosed in a few Rags that stuft up the Trunk This amazing sight threw the poor Lady into a most violent Distraction and 't was very hard to hold her from falling into a Fit her Husband seeming as much amazed as her self and joining in the complaint as loud as she But to abate her Rage he told her the wicked Rogue should not so scape he had very sufficient security from able Friends for his honest and faithful service and their Purses should make her Reparation till when the Loss should be made up out of his own Pocket Nor would he sleep till he had made her some farther satisfaction and therefore beg'd her Excuse but for one half Hour till he took Coach and made that search and quest that perhaps would bring her some considerable Light into the Villany Her Zeal for her Loss never look'd any farther and accordingly well pleas'd with the Kind Motion she took leave of him for the half Hour aforesaid But alas a long half Hour for half the Evening nay the whole Night was gone and neither Man nor Master to be heard of So Husband and Portion all departed she thought fit to secure her Goods and Cloaths at the Carriers but the same Calamity attended there likewise for Tom had been there too and swept all To describe the Distress and Anguish of our present Female Sufferer or either of her two foregoing Sisters in Affliction being a work beyond our power we shall e'ne do as the Painter did of old that is draw a Vail before the Face of sorrow the Lineaments of true Grief being above the Pen or Pencils skill And now to follow our Libertine through all his Rambles and Exploits in this wide Town of London for there lyes his next Scene being matter we have not yet fully been inform'd in we dare not venture to play the Historian any farther than certain Intelligence which yet we have not received can guide us being resolved not to load our Rambles with Romance or Fiction his Life being furnisht with matter sufficiently voluminous without the addition of Flourish or Fancy Let it suffice that some time after all these three successive Adventures the poor Ludlow VVife comes up to London being the last place she has to make her quest after this Impostor and Monster for those are the gentlest Names her Sufferings and Resentments can give him She has a great Opinion that Newgate or Newgate Roll or some other such Chronicles of his Renown will give her some light into his Life and Fortune and perhaps the Justice of Heaven afford her a sight of him at least if not a power to execute Heavens and her just Vengeance on so egregious a Reprobate Her Inn being at Holborn Bridge she lights into the Company of a good Motherly VVoman just come from Oxfordshire the sorrow in so young a Face and the swoln Eyes which were not yet dryed the Fountain being indeed inexhaustible the Curiosity of the Elder Traveller made bold to ask her the cause of so doleful a look c. The young one who now had no Reserves plainly told her whole sufferings to which the Matron replyed Alas young VVoman what are your griefs to mine I have been many years the VVife of the most Infamous Miscreant that the Earth ever bore deserted and abandoned by the wickedest of Men after long years of Honest and Loyal Fidelity to his Bed and exposed to perish which you thanks to able Friends need not fear c. with a great deal more bitter Invectives against him Till at last upon further conferring of Notes and describing of Characters and Persons they came to jump together and found ' emselves both abused by the very same Monster the eldest being indeed his old Banbury Wife What Amazement this Accident produced may easily be conjectured it will be enough to tell you that the Anguish of both their Souls and the Bitterness of Gall on each side made 'em Swear an inviolable Friendship determining to search if possible the whole World to hunt down this Devil Accordingly they take a Lodging a little higher in Holborn where making no secret of both their hard cases they open their whole Souls to their new Landlady to engage her assistance in the Quarrel The Landlady Transported at both their Narrations fell upon her Knees and blest God he had sent 'em to her House for this Lucifer they had described was certainly the very Man that next Week was to Marry her Daughter This surprize put 'em all into new Confusion and the Daughter being called to the Council it was evident that this very Fellow had made Love to the Daughter of the House the day of Marriage concluded the Ring and Wedding Cloaths preparing c. This last Deliverance made the poor old Woman and the Daughter no less melt into Tears at this happy Discovery Well 't is agreed between 'em all that they shall not stir till he comes thither which will be in twenty four Hours at most and all their united Vengeance Constables Warrants and what not shall be prepar'd for his Reception This Resolution was heartily fix'd amongst 'em only the Banbury Wife would that Evening take a walk to a Cozens a Citizen where she had some important Affairs but nothing should stay her abroad above an Hour she had not walk'd half a Furlong but Destiny or some other ruling Power threw her full in the Mouth of her Husband her Passion at sight of him rose so high that at first it could not find vent for words which he perceiving desired her to walk into a Tavern which was just before 'em and there recover her Confusion You may conceive she was very ready to accept the Invitation her Stomach being so full that 't was the only thing she wanted to have her full swing at him The Discourse of her part you may well guess at but his Answer was so tender and his Confession so open that at last she grew patient enough to hear him out He plainly told her all he had done or at least the greatest part that it was only the Effects of his Wants and Necessities that now he had rais'd enough to
the said Rob. Croker and Will. Croker Robert Penniston and Jane Penniston and also pay and discharge one Bond for the Principal Sum of five hundred pounds with Interest which I became bound for with Thomas Walker to one Thomas Irons any thing herein before contained to the contrary thereof in any wise notwithstanding and also that he the said William Wickham shall out of his Legacy and Lands and Premises aforesaid to him devised pay or cause to be paid unto my Executors hereafter named the Sum of five hundred pounds to be by them bestomed distributed or employed for the use and benefit of the Poor of the Parish of Swacklift aforesaid in such manner as they or the major part of them shall think fit and convenient Item I give and bequeath unto the said John Brooking out of the Moneys that shall be raised of the Sale of the said Lands and Tenements called Apple tree Ducy aforesaid the Summ of Five hundred Pounds And all the rest and residue of the Moneys that shall be thereby raised I do hereby give and bequeath unto the said William Davies Senior and Thomas Cullin Senior to be equally divided between them and the Survivor of them Item I give and bequeath unto Alice Cullin Wife of the said Thomas Cullin Senior the Sum of Six hundred Pounds to her own proper Use and Disposal Item I give and bequeath in like manner the Sum of Six huadred Pounds unto Jane Davis the Wife of the said William Davis Item I give unto the said Robert Croker and Will. Croker the Sum of Ten Pounds a piece to buy them Mourning and also to each of them a Ring of Twelve Shillings Item I give unto Jane Croker and Mary Croker and also to the said Robert Penniston and Jane Penniston and all other my Legates herein before mentioned and to every of them the Sum of Ten Pounds a piece to buy them Mourning and a Ring of Twelve Shillings Item Where as I have the Sum of Seven hundred Pounds lying at Iuterest in the hands of Mr. Ambrose Holbitch in the name of Oliver Charles my Servant I do hereby give and bequeath the same to and amongst my Four Servants Oliver Charles John Harber Sarah Winn and Margery Smith and the Survivor of them to be equally divided amongst them share and share alike Item I give and bequeath my Three Geldings and all my Accoutrements belonging to them unto the said John Brookeing William Davis Senior and Thomas Cullin Senior viz. my Bright Bay Gelding to the said Thomas Cullin and my Black Gelding to the said William Davis and my Dapple-grey Gelding to the said John Brookeing All the Arrears of Rent in my Tenants Hands at the time of my Decease I do hereby freely acquit and discharge And all the rest and Residue of my Personal Estate not herein before devised after my Debts Legacies and Funeral Expences paid and discharged I do hereby give and bequeath unto my said Kinsman William Wickham And lastly I do hereby nominate constitute and appoint the said William Wickham John Brooking William Davis senior and Thomas Cullin senior Executors of this my Will hereby revoking and making v id all other and former Will or Wills by me made In Witness whereof I the said Humphrey Wickham have to this my last Will containing one side of a Sheet of Paper and almost half the back thereof set my Hand and Seal this Twentieth day of Decemb Anno Dom. 1691. Humphrey Wickham Signed Sealed Published and Declared in the presence of us with the words Will. Wickham being first interlined Rob. Smith Jo. Chapman Rich. Chapman Mart. Pinckard I the above-named Humphrey Wickham having omitted out of my Will above-mentioned the Disposition of my Estate in Huntingtonshire do hereby make this Addition to and part of my said Will in manner following I give and bequeath all my Lands Tenements and Hereditaments called Pryor's Farm and all other my Estate in Holly-well and Needingworth unto the above-named John Brooking William Davis senior and Tho. Cullin senior and the Survivor of them and their Heirs and the Heirs of the Survivor of them under this special Trust and Confidence that the said Jo. Brooking William Davis and Thomas Cullin shall sell and dispose of the same and out of the Moneys thereby raised pay or cause to be paid the respective Legacies hereafter named viz. I give and bequeath to Humphrey Longford the sum of six hundred pounds and to his Sister Mary Longford the like sum of six hundred pounds Item I give and bequeath unto the said Tho. Cullin Sen. the further Sum of 800 l. and all the Remainder of the Moneys thereby raised I give and bequeath unto the said Will. Davis Sen. and Jane his Wife and the Survivor of them Item Whereas I have by Will above-said given unto John Cullin Son of the said Thomas Cullin the impropriated Parsonage of Sowgrave my true meaning is That I do give and devise the same to the said John Cullin and his Heirs for ever In Witness whereof I the said Humphrey Wickham have to this Codicil Addition or futher part of my said Will set my Hand and Seal this Twenty eighth Day of December Anno Dom. 1691. Humphrey Wickham Signed Sealed Published and Declared in the Presence of us Robert Smith John Chapman Rich. Chapman Martin Pinkard Probatum fuit c. This stupendious confidence of a dying man is very amazing nay he drove on the Masquerade at that strange rate that he may be truly said to have ended as he began having received the blessed Sacrament pretended the settlement of his Conscience and making peace with Heaven with that seeming sincerity as if he had resolved to prevaricate with God with the same assurance he had all along done with Mankind The credulity of these deluded persons his Landlord and the rest is not much to be wonder'd at when the last Gasps of Death could carry so fair an Hypocrisie and their Transports for his extravagant Legacies bequeathed 'em are rather to be pittied then rediculed And if they have been faulty in any little over-fondness of their imaginary good fortune the Jests and Gibes they have received have been their sufficient punishment besides Mr. Cullin's being run out of above 30 l. After his Death care was taken to provide him a Coffin of about 10 l. value and the Embalmers were paid for some of their Office of preserving him sweet till preparations for a solemn and sumptuous Funeral could be made suitable to the remains of the honourable Deceased And this Letter was sent as follows Sir THESE serve to inform you that Humphrey Wickham Esquire of Swaclift in the County of Oxon died this morning at my House where he has been about ten days He has made his Will and you are one of his Executors with me and others A very great share of his Estate is given to you therefore pray Sir speed to London that we may take care of his Funeral and other matters necessary to be done upon this occasion I think it may not be amiss that you keep this private lest any thing may be Purloyned or Imbezelled by any of the deceaseds Servants or any else at his Seat at Swaclift which is all given to you some Legacies thereout to be paid I am Sir Your Servant Tho. Cullin London 3. January 1691 2. From my House at the Wheat-sheaf near St. Clements Church over against Arundel Street Strand To Mr. William Wickham of Gazington inquire at the Blew Boars Head in Oxon. These following Lines were inclosed from the aforesaid Executors in the said Letter being left by the deceased WHereas I Humphrey Wickham Esquire in Company with my own man John Harbert and John Austin Son of Nich. Austin did carry a black Hoggs Skin Trunk marked with the Letters H. W. 1688. Wherein are the Deeds of my Estate at Sowgrave and Aple-tree Ducy these are to desire you to deliver them to the Executors signed with his own Name thus _____ Humphrey Wickham Memorandom that there are two Mortgages in the hands of Austin the one for 1400 l. and the other for 400 l. In the name of Oliver Charles in the hands of Mr. Ambrose Holbech In answer to this Letter came a Gentleman from Oxford to tell Mr. Cullin that the Christian name of this Mr. Wickham of Gazington was mistaken which gave the first Alarm of an Imposture otherewise Horse and Mourning had been provided to have carried him down to Swackley for his Interment there Mr. Cullin being not over apt to believe himself cheated but more to satisfie the rest of the World sent down a Messenger to Swackley with fifteen shillings in his Pocket mounted upon a poor Hackney but ordered to return upon the Bright Bay Gelding bequeathed him in his Will being not convinced of the Delusion till his Messengers Return notwithstanding several persons of Reputation had declared him a counterfeit Major Richardson and Mr. Compton had both inspected the Corps and averred him to be the very man formerly Judged for six Wives as before mentioned and more than once their Prisoner in Newgate The Messenger returning Tuesday the 12th of January he brought a Compliment to the Executors from Captain Wickham who had treated the Messenger very civilly to this effect that he gave 'em his hearty thanks for their intended kindness to him and if they would please to come to Swackley for a Month or more they should be very welcome and have the use of all the Geldings viz. the Black the Bright Bay and Dapple Grey tho he could not well part with 'em for good and all Upon this full satisfaction received about three the next Morning with no more than a Watchman and a Lanthorn in a a Coffin of four shillings price he was laid in Earth in a Nook of St. Clements Church yard Postscript THE Nurse and Assistants that attended him in his sickness now call to mind that they once or twice observed him to laugh to himself very pleasantly which they suppose proceeded from the pleasure he took in cheating the World he was then just upon leaving FINIS
her Griefs and Disquiets had made her take a long Ramble to see him once more And that she was now at Hereford not daring to approach any nearer till she had his gracious Warrant and Permission which she humbly upon her bended Knees intreated of him with a great deal more passionate Courtship to him upon that Subject Upon perusal of this Letter he seem'd to melt into a great deal of good nature and compassion for his dear Sister insomuch that a Tear stood in his Eyes which his sweet Bride very kindly drank in a kiss At length launching out into a great many tender Expressions towards his Sister which Goodness his kind Bride much applauded and encouraged throwing in many a kind word in her Sisters behalf At last the Brother concluded he would be so civil to her that since her extravagant Affection had brought her thus far to visit him he would return her the Favour of Riding himself to Hereford to fetch her if his kind Father would procure him a Horse Ay with all his heart Nay both Father and Daughter proffer'd to take the same Journey with him to pay their Respects to the young Lady and attend upon her as part of her Train to Ludlow No by no means replied our Spark that was more than the Rules of Honour would allow for his dear Bride as his Wife was a Person in Quality above her and whatever Kindnesses she pleased to show her when at Ludlow was in her free Power but this complaisance was too great a Condescension and consequently he beg'd her leave that the tenderness he had of her Honour might absolutely forbid her any such thought And indeed his Father 's was much the same Condescention which he must likewise no way suffer The Father and Daughter both silenced with this Answer acquiesced with his Reasons as being much a more experienced Master of Ceremonies than they could pretend to consenting to let him go alone only attended by the Sister's Page in the mean while resolving to apply their officious Respects to this fair tho yet unknown Relation another way viz. in making a suitable preparation for her honourable Reception But first a very stately Horse was borrow'd one that a Collonel of the Guards had lately bid a lumping Sum for with all Accoutrements answerable And at mounting our Cavalier whispering in his Father's ear and telling him he had been long from home and not knowing whether his remaining Stock might hold out to his present Occasions he desired The Father would not hear out the Speech but running up stairs presently fetch'd down and stole into his hand a silk Purse richly lined with Twenty Broad Pieces Our Squire thus every way obliged after his due Conges all made bids them all Farewel till to morrow and so prances off Here let us leave the Father and Daughter as busy for the Credit of the Cause as may be imagined making all suitable Provision for to morrow's Entertainment the Kitchin and Pantry the Bed-Chamber and the Court-Cubboard must all appear in Splendour extraordinary And now to return to our Traveller Heaven knows he had the misfortune to miss his way for he never found Hereford nor Sister His Barb too found another Chapman than the Collonel of the Guards for both Horse and Accoutrements all embargoed and the dismounted Cavalier slipt into a Frize-Coat of his Man Tom's providing who waited his coming The Master Page and Tom in a small prepared Vessel troul'd down the Severn as fast as Tide and good Speed could carry them As we thunder'd down the Severne one of our Strollers being at present useless our Page well rewarded for playing his part in the Farse is dropt at Worcester from whence we continue our Voyage to Bristol Arrived there pretty late in a Summers Evening 't is not thought convenient to appear in any Dress whatever had been seen before at Ludlow nor indeed to expose his Face lest any Inquiry might be made there about him as a Sherry-Merchant and so trunking up all his best Rayment he gets himself new rigged at a Salesmans in a genteel Garb but something modester than his Ludlow Bravery and Tom and he next morning move off to Bath It fortunes here that he Quarters at one of the great Inns it being the beginning of the Summer just before Bath time where was a brisk Daughter of the house about half way stage between 20 and 30. and consequently much inclinable manwards A Girl that had had the Honour of many a slap cross the Mouth and chuck under the Chin by Lords and Earls in her time her Fathers honourable Guests at Bath season Our most constant Lover of every new face feels the old Itch again Business he finds will thicken upon him and therefore flusht with his late Successes he resolves to throw out his winning hand as far as it will run But now to know what Portion this Damsel had for without a spill of yellow Boys naked White and Red has but indifferent Charms with him This Intelligence was quickly made without asking the question for there was a Jest in the Family of one of the Drawers being Suitor there who belike wanted a tite sum of 80 l. to set up withal a small Portion of hers formerly left her by a Grandfather and now at use This Drawer forsooth was a Rival but not an over-formidable one For truly our Inn-keepers Daughter had so often been tickled with the Addresses of Quality that Foh her Fathers Drawer was scarce worthy to hold up her Train A Gentleman or nothing for her Nay if she has not the happiness to strike in for a Lease for Life at Bed and Board with some honourable Person rather than dye in ignorance keep a stale Maiden-head and so lead Apes she has long since resolved not to stand out at a lower game and en'e admit a Tenant at Will to an Inmate of Fashion and Quality and was grosly suspected she had tried the Constitution of her Body under a load of Honour long before her present year of twenty five But true or false that 's a small Blot in her Scutchion Our Don John is absolutely captivated and plies lier home with all the Rhetorick that Love can afford Our man Tom in the mean while but very modestly is whispering amongst his Mates the lower Tire of the Family the Servants what a Worthy Gentleman his Master is being a Rich Norfolk Gentleman a pretty large stride from Bathe of 500 a year This Narrative passes pretty well amongst the shallower pates the Chamberlain the Tapster the Hostler and the rest of the inferior Domesticks but our hardfaith'd young Mistress of the house whither bit before or naturally not over-credulous does as good as declare That her Principles are to look before she leaps Our Norfolk Suitor finds his Addresses very acceptable but still with a reserve Provided he be the Man he appears He plainly sees that the Girl upon good Grounds is very pliable but