draweth to evill and abject things 7 For the litle force which remaineth is like a certain sparke lying hidden in the ashes 8 This is naturall reason it selfe compassed about with great darknesse still retaining power to discerne good and evill the distance between true and false 9 Although it be unable to compasse all that it approvâ—th and enjoyeth not the full light of truth nor the former integrity of her affections 10 Hence it is my God that according to my inward man I delight in thy law knowing thy commandements to be good just and holy and yeelding that all evill and sinne is to be avoided 11 But in my flesh I serve the law of sinne whilest I rather obey sensuality then reason Hence it is that I have a will to doe good but know not how to performe it 12 For this cause I often purpose many good things but for that I want grace to helpe my infirmity for a light resistance I goe back and faint 13 I know the way of perfection and see clearly enough what I ought to doe but pressed with the weight of mine own corruption I rise not unto it 14 O Lord how needfull is thy grace for mee to begin any good worke to goe forward and to accomplish it For without it I can doe nothing but in thee I can doe all things when thy grace doth comfort me 15 O heavenly grace without which our own merits are nothing and no gifts of nature are to be esteemed Arts riches beauty and strength wit or eloquence are of no worth with thee O Lord without thy grace 16 For gifts of nature are common to good and evill but the peculiar gift of the elect is grace and love wherewith being marked they are esteemed worthy of everlasting life 17 This grace so much excelleth that neither the gift of prophesie nor the working of miracles or any speculation how high soever is of any esteeme without it Neither faith nor hope nor other vertues are acceptable unto thee without charity and grace 18 O most blessed grace that makest the poore in spirit rich in vertues and the rich in many blessings humble in heart 19 Come downe unto me replenish me in the morning with thy comfort lest my soule should faint with wearinesse and wither away with drinesse 20 I beseech thee Lord that I may find grace in thy sight for thy grace is sufficient for me though other things that nature desireth be wanting unto me 21 If I be tempted and vexed with many tribulations I will not feare these evils whilest thy grace is with me she is my strength she giveth advise and helpe she is stronger then all enemies and wiser then the wisest 22 Thy grace is the mistresse of truth the teacher of discipline the light of the heart the solace in affliction 23 She driveth away sorrow she expelleth feare she is the nurse of devotion and the mother of teares 24 What am I without it but a rotten peece of wood and an unprofitable stalke only meet for the fire 25 Let thy grace therefore Lord alwaies prevent me and follow me make me ever diligent in good works through Iesus Christ thy Sonne Amen CHAP. LVI That we ought to deny our selves and imitate Christ by the Crosse. SOnne look how much thou canst goe out of thy selfe so much maist thou enter into me As to be void of all desire of externall things maketh inward peace so the forsaking of our selves joyneth us internally to God 2 I will have thee learne the perfect leaving of thy selfe unto my will without contradiction and complaint Follow me I am the way the truth and the life 3 Without the way there is no going aright without truth there is no knowing aright without life there is no living at all 4 I am the way which thou oughtest to follow the truth which thou oughtest to trust the life for which thou oughtest to hope 5 I am the way which cannot lead amisse the truth which cannot erre the life which cannot end 6 I am the way that is straight the truth that is highest and the life that is truest yea a blessed life a life uncreated 7 If thou abide in my way thou shalt know the truth and the truth shall make thee free and thou shalt lay hold on life everlasting 8 If thou wilt enter into life keep the commandements if thou wilt know the truth believe me If thou wilt be perfect sell all thou hast 9 If thou wilt be my disciple deny thy selfe if thou wilt possesse a blessed life despise this present life if thou wilt be exalted in heaven humble thy selfe upon earth 10 If thou wilt reigne with mee beare the crosse with me For only the servants of the crosse find the way of blisse and true light 11 Lord Iesu for as much as thy life was strict despised of the world give me grace to imitate thee though I be despised by the world 12 For the servant is not greater then his Lord nor the Disciple above his Master 13 Let thy servant be exercised in thy holy life for there is my health true holinesse 14 Whatsoever I read or heare besides doth not recreate or delight me fully 15 Sonne now that thou knowest and hast read all these things happy shalt thou be if thou fulfill them 16 He that hath my commandements and keepeth them he it is that loveth me and I will love him and will manifest my selfe unto him and will make him sit with me in the Kingdome of my Father 17 Lord Iesus as thou hast said and promised so let it be and that I may obtain thy favour 18 I have receaved the Crosse I have receaved it from thy hand and I will beare it and beare it till death as thou hast laid it upon me 19 Truly the life of a good religious person is the crosse and it is a sure guide to heaven It is now begunne it is not lawfull to goe back neither is it fit to leave that which I have undertaken 20 Let us then take courage my brethren and goe forwards together Iesus will be with us for Iesus sake we have undertaken this crosse 21 For the love of Iesus let us persevere in the crosse he will be our helper who is our guide and forerunner 22 Behold our King goeth before us who also will fight for us let us follow him manfully let us not be dismayed but be ready to dye with courage in the battaile and let us not blemish our glory by flying from the Crosse. CHAP. LVII That a man be not too much deiected when he falleth into some defects SOnne patience and humility in time of adversity are more pleasing unto mee then much comfort and devotion in prosperity 2 Why art thou grieved for every litle trifle spoken and done against thee Although it had been much more thou oughtest not to have been moved 3 But now let it passe it is not the first that hath happened
Iesus shall be with me as a strong warrior and thou shalt remaine confounded 19 I had rather dye and undergoe any torment then to consent unto thee Hold thy peace and be silent I will hear thee no more though thou shouldest worke me many troubles 20 My Lord is my light and my salvation whom then shall I feare If whole armies should stand together against me my heart shall not feare Our Lord is my helper and my Redeemer 21 Fight like a good souldier and if thou sometimes fall through frailty take to thee a better heart then before trusting in my more aboundant grace and take great heed of arrogancy and selfe-conceit 22 For this cause many are led into errour and sometimes fall into blindnesse that is almost incurable 23 Let the fall of the proud foolishly presuming of their own strength serve thee for a warning and a perpetuall humiliation CHAP. VII That grace is to be hid under the veile of humility SOnne it is more profitable and safe for thee to hide the grace of devotion not to extoll thy selfe nor to speak much nor to esteeme much thereof but rather to despise thy selfe and fear it as given to one unworthy thereof 2 That affection is not to be cleared unto which may be quickly changed into the contrary Think when thou art in grace how miserable and needy thou art wont to be without it 3 Neither doth therein only conâ—ist the progresse of a spirituall life when thou hast the grace of comfort but when thou humbly and patiently canst suffer the with-drawing thereof 4 So that thou be not then lesse diligent in the exercise of prayer nor suffer thy selfe to passe over the rest of thy accustomed good works 5 But that thou willingly performe what lyeth in thee according as thou art able and understandest to be fit not neglecting thy selfe wholly for the drynesse and trouble of mind which thou feelest 6 There are many that when it succeedeth not well with them presently they become either impatient or negligent 7 The way of man is not alwaies in his power but belongeth to God to give and to comfort when he will how much he will and whom he will as it shall please him and no more 8 Some unadvised persons have overthrown themselves for the greedy desire which they had of the grace of devotion 9 Attempting more then they were able to performe not weighing the measure of their weaknesse but following rather the desire of their heart then the judgement of reason 10 And because they presumed on greater matters then was pleasing to God therefore they quickly lost their grace 11 They were made needy and left in a dejected estate that built themselves nests in heaven to the end that being humbled and impoverished they may learn not to fly with their own wings but to live in hope under my feathers 12 They that are yet new and unacquainted in the way of our Lord unlesse they governe themselves by the counsaile of the wise may easily be deceaved and overthrowne 13 And if they will rather follow their own judgement then give credit to others that are experienced their end will be dangerous if they cannot be drawn from their own conceipt 14 Seldome those that are wise in their own opinion suffer themselves humbly to be governed by others 15 A litle knowledge with humility and a slender understanding is better then great treasures of learning with a vaine selfe liking 16 It is better for thee to have lesse then much of that whereof thou maist be proud 17 He doth not discreetly that wholly giveth himselfe over to mirth forgetting his former poverty and the chast fear of God which feareth to loose the grace which hee hath obtained 18 Neither is he vertuously wise that in time of adversity or any tribulation whatsoever yeeldeth to despairing thoughts and thinketh and imagineth of theÌ„ lesse confidently then he ought 19 He that will be over secure in time of peace shall be often found too dejected and fearfull in time of warre 20 If thou couldest alwaies continue humble lowly within thy selfe and temper and governe thy soul well thou shouldest not so soone fall into danger and offence 21 It is good counsell that when thou conceavest fervor of spirit thou shouldest think what will become of thee when that light shall leave thee 22 And when that doth happen remember the light may returne again which for thy instruction my glory I have with-drawn for a time 23 Such proofe is often more profitable then if thou shouldest alwaies enjoy prosperity according to thy desire 24 For worth is not to be weighed in a man by the number of visions and comforts which he hath or by his knowledge in Scriptures or by his being placed in high degrees but in that he is grounded in true humility and replenished with divine charity 25 If he alwaies purely and entirely seeke the honour of God if he esteeme himself nothing and with a sincere heart despise himselfe and rejoyce more to be humbled then honoured by others CHAP. VIII Of a meane conceipt of our selves in the sight of God SHall I speake unto my Lord sith I am dust and ashes If I esteeme better of my selfe behold thou standest against me and my iniquities beare true witnesse neither can I speake against it 2 But if I abase and esteeme nothing of my selfe and cast off all selfe-conceipt and as I am accompt my selfe to be dust 3 Thy grace will be favourable unto me and thy light will be neere unto my heart and all estimation how litle soever shall be swallowed up in the depth of my nothing and perish everlastingly 4 There thou shewest my selfe unto me what I am what I have been and whither I am come for alas I am nothing and I knew it not 5 And if I be left to my selfe behold I become nothing and a masse of infirmity but if thou suddainly looke upon me I am presently made strong and filled with new joy 6 And it is a great marvaile that I am so suddainly lifted up and so graciously imbraced by thee that of mine owne weight alwaies sinke downeward 7 Thy love is cause hereof freely preventing me and relieving me in many necessities preserving me also from grievous dangers and as I may truly say delivering me from innumerable evils 8 For surely by evill loving my selfe I lost my selfe and by seeking theâ— alone and sincerely loving thee I have found both my selfe and thee and for thy love have more deeply brought my selfe to nothing 9 For that thou O most sweet Iesuâ— dealest with me above all desert and above all that I dare hope or request 10 Blessed be thou my God for although I be unworthy of all good yet the noblenesse of thy bounty and thy infinite goodnesse never ceaseth to doe good even to the ungratefull and to them that be turned away farre from thee 11 Turne us unto thee O Lord that we may be
with patience humility against evill tongues and such as thought vanities and lies and spake what they listed 7 Yet sometimes notwithstanding he answered lest the weake might have received scandall by his silence 8 Who art thou that fearest mortal man to day he is and to morrow he is not seene Feare God and the terrour of men shall not trouble thee 9 What harme can the words or injuries of any doe thee he rather hurteth himselfe then thee neither can he avoid the Iudgments of God be lie what he will 10 Have thou God before thine eyes and contend not with complaining words 11 I am able to deliver thee from all shame and wrong and to repray every one according to their workes 12 And if for the present thou seemest to be trodden downe and to suffer shame and confusion without desert doe not repine neither doe thou lessen thy crowne by thy impatience but rather lift up thine eyes to mee in hea CHAP. XXXVII Of a full and pure resignation of our selves for the obtaining freedome of heart SOnne leave thy selfe and thou shalt find me Make choice of nothing appropriate nothing to thy selfe and thou shalt ever gaine 2 For greater grace shall alwaies he given thee when thou doest perfectly resigne thy selfe and not turne back to take thy selfe againe 3 Lord how often shall I resigne my selfe and wherein shall I forsake my selfe Alwaies and in every thing as well in litle as in great 4 I doe accept nothing but doe require that thou be as it were naked and void of all things 5 Otherwise how canst thou be perfectly mine and I thine unlesse both within and without thou be free from all selfe-will 6 And how much the sooner thou doest this so much the better shalt thou find thy selfe and how much the more fully sincerely thou doest it so much the more shalt thou please me and so much the more shalt thou gaine 7 Some there are that resigne themselves but with some exception For they put not their whole trust in God and therefore doe labour to provide for themselves 8 Some also at the first doe offer all but afterwards being affailed with temptations doe returne againe to that which they had left and therefore they goe not afterwards in the way of vertue 9 These shall not attaine to the true liberty of a pure heart nor to the grace of my divine familiarity unlesse they first make an entire resignation and offer themselves a daily sacrifice unto me 10 For without this can never be obtained the union with me wherewith my Saints enjoy me 11 I have often said unto thee and now againe I say the same Forsake thy selfe resigne thy selfe and thou shalt enjoy great internall peace 12 Give all for all seeke nothing require nothing repose thy selfe purely and with a full confidence in me and I will give my selfe unto thee and darknesse shall not cover thee 13 Let this be thy whole endeavour let this be thy praier let this be thy desire 14 That casting off all proprietie thou maist all naked follow thy naked Saviour Iesus and dying to thy selfe maist live eternally to me 15 Then shall vaine fantasies evil perturbations and all superfluous cares fly away then shall immoderate feare leave thee and inordinate love shall die CHAP. XXXVIII Of good government of outward things and of recourse to God in dangers SOnne thou oughtest with all diligence to procure that in every place and action or externall businesse thou be inwardly free and master of thy self and that all things be under thy disposition and thou not subject to them 2 That thou maist be Lord and Master of thy actions not a servant or a hireling but rather a freeman and a true Hebrew belonging to the lot and freedome of the Sons of God 3 Who put the things that are present under their feet and place their thoughts on that which is eternall who look on transitory things with the left eye and with the right doe behold the things of heaven 4 Who depend not upon temporall things but make such things depend upon them and serve them 5 As they are ordained by God and appointed by the Creator of all who hath left nothing in his creatures without due order 6 If thou remaine firme and stedfast in all events and doest not weigh by the outward appearance nor with a carnall eye the things which thou seest and hearest 7 But presently in every occasion doest enter with Moses into the Tabernacle to aske counsell of our Lord thou shalt sometimes heare the divine and celestiall oracle and shalt returne instructed of many things both present and to come 8 Moses had alwaies recourse to the Tabernacle for the deciding of all doubts and obscure questions and fied to the help of praier for the remedy of the iniquity and dangers of men 9 So oughtest thou in like manner to fly to the closet of thy heart earnestly craving the divine favour 10 For the Scripture testifieth that therefore was Iosue and the children of Israell deceived by the Giboanites because they consulted not first with God but giving too lightly credit to faire words were deluded with counterfeit piety CHAP. XXXIX That a man be not over earnest in his affaires SOn alwaies commit thy cause to me I will dispose well of it in due time expect my ordination and thou shalt find it will be for thy good 2 Lord I doe most willingly commit all unto thee for my care can profit litle O that I cleaved not too much to future events but oftered my selfe with all readinesse of mind to thy divine pleasure 3 Sonne oftentimes a man doth earnestly labour for that which he desireth and when he hath gotten it he beginneth to be of another mind and not to esteeme so much of it as before he did 4 For mans affections doe not long continue fixed on one thing but doe passe from one to another 5 It is therefore a matter not of least moment to forsake our selves even in the least things 6 The true spirituall profit of man consisteth in denying and forsaking of himselfe and he that is thus resigned up liveth in great freedome and securitie 7 But the ancient enemie who alwaies laboureth to withstand the servants of God omitteth at no time his wonted temptations but day and night lieth still in waite to cast the unwary if he can into the snare of deceipt Watch therefore and pray saith our Lord that you enter not into temptation CHAP. XL. That man hath no good of himselfe nor any thing whereof he can glory LOrd what is man that thou art mindfull of him or the son of man that thou vouchsafest to visit him What hath man deserved that thou shouldest give him thy grace 2 Lord what cause have I to complaine if thou forsake me or if thou dost not that which I desire what can I justly say against it 3 Surely this I may truly think and say Lord I am
puâ—fed up with pride or rely too much upon worldly comforts 16 O how good a conscience would he keep that would not seek after transitory joy who would not entangle himselfe with the affaires of this world 17 O how great peace and quietnesse should he possesse that can cast away all vain-cares and think only upon heavenly things and would place all his hope and confidence in God! 18 No man is worthy of heavenly comfort unlesse he have diligently exercised himselfe in holy compunction 19 If thou desirest true contrition of heart enter into thy closet and shut out all worldly tumult as it is written examine your owne hearts upon your beâ—s and be still 20 In thy closet thou shalt find what abroad thou shalt often loose the more thou visitt thy closet the more thou wilt lik it the lesse thou comest thereunto the more thou wilt loath it 21 If in the beginning of thy amendment thou art content to remain in it and keepe it well it will afterwards be to thee a deare friend and a most pleasant comfort 22 In silence and in quietnesse a devout soule maketh her selfe perfect and learneth the secrets and mysteries of holy Scripture 23 There shee findeth flouds of teares wherein shee may every night wash and clense her selfe that she may be so much the more familiar with her Creator by how much the farther off she liveth from all worldly disquiet 24 Who so therefore withdrawâ—th himselfe from his acquaintance and friends God and his holy Angels will draw neere â—nto him 25 It is better to live privately and to have regard to himselfe then to neglect himselfe and his owne salvation though he could worke miracles 26 It is very commendable in a religious person seldome to goe abroad to be unwilling either to see or to be seen 27 Why art thoâ— willing and desirous to see that which is unlawfull for thee to have and injoy for the world passeth away and the lusts thereof 28 Our sensuall desires draw us to â—oave abroad but when the pleasure is past what carriest thou home with thee but a grieved conscience and distracted mind 29 A merry going out bringeth commonly a mournfull returne home and a joyfull evening makes many times a sad morning 30 So all carnall joy hath a pleasant entrance but in the end it bites like an Adder and stings like a Cockatrice 31 What canst thou see elsewhere which thou canst not see here behold here are heaven and earth and all the Elements for of these are all things created 32 What canst thou see any where that can long continue under the sun thou thâ—nkest perchance to satiate thy selfe and have thy fill but thou shalt never attaine it 33 Shoâ—ldst thou see all things present before thine eyes it were but a vaine and unprofitable sight lift up thine eyes to God in the highest and pray him to pardon all thy sinnes and infirmities 34 Leave vain things to the vain and doe thou give heed to that which God commandeth shut the doore upon thy selfe and call unto thee Iesus thy Beloved 35 Stay with him in thy closet for thou shalt not find so great peace any where else hadst thou not gone abroad and hearkned to idle rumours thou hadst lived more at hearts-ease 36 And seeing thou delightest sometimes to heare newes it is fit thou suffer for it some unquietnesse and trouble of mind CHAP. XXI Of compunction of Heart IF thou wilt any thing come forward keepe thy selfe alwaies in the feare of God and yeeld not too much scope to liberty 2 Keepe in awe all thy senses under the severe rod of Discipline and give not thy selfe over to foolish mirth 3 Give thy selfe to compunction of heart and thou shalt find much devotion therein compunction bringeth much good which dissolutenesse is wont quickly to destroy 4 A wonder it is that any man can heartily rejoyce in this life if he duly consider his banishment and throughly weight the many perils wherewith his soule is invironed 5 The levity of our minds and the litle care we have of our faults makes us insensible of the sorrowes of our soules 6 But we often vainly laugh when we should justly weepe the service and feare of God is the truest liberty and a good conscience a continuall feast 7 Happy is he that can avoid all cause of distraction and recollect himselfe to the union of holy compunction 8 Happy is he that can cast away from himselfe all that may defile his conscience or any way grieve or burthen it 9 Bestirre thy selfe like a man one custome overcomes another if thou canst forbeare medling in other mens matters they likewise shall not have to doe with thine 10 Busie not thy selfe in matters which appertaine to others neither doe thou meddle at all with the affaires of thy betters 11 Still have an eye to thy selfe first and be sure more especially to instruct thy selfe before all thy loving friends 12 If thou hast not the favour of men be not grieved at it but take this to heart because thou dost not carry thy selfe so warily and circumspectly as it becometh the servant of God and a devout religious man 13 It is better oftentimes and more secure that a man hath not consolations in this life especially such as are consonant to our carnall desires 14 But that we have not all or very seldome tasted divine consolation we may thank our selves because we seeke not after inward compunction as having not altogether forsaken outward vanities 15 Know that thou art unworthy of divine consolation and that thouhast deserved much tribulation 16 When a man hath perfect contrition then is the whole world grievous and loathsome unto him 17 A good man never wanteth matter of mourning for whether he consider his owne or his neighbours estate he knowes that none liveth here without great tribulation 18 And by how much a man looks narrowly into himselfe by so much he sees greater cause of lamentation 29 Our sinnes and wickednesses wherein we lye weltring doe minister unto us so much matter of sorrow and compunction that we can seldome apply our selves to heavenly contemplations 20 Didst thou but as often think with thy selfe how soone thou maist die as how long thou maist live there is no question but thou wouldst more earnestly labour thine amendment 21 If thou but let the paines that hereafter are to be endured sink deeply into thy heart I belieeve thou wouldst willingly undergoe any labour or sorrow in this world and not be afraid of the greatest severity 22 But because we doe not take these things to heart and as yet love those things only that delight us this makes us so dull and key-cold in Religion 23 If our body be amisse we may thank our selves for it it is often our decay and want of spirit which makes our miserable body so easily complain 24 Pray therefore unto the Lord with alll humility that he will vouchsafe to give thee the
spirit of contrition 25 And say with the Prophet feed me O Lord with the bread of tears and give me plenteousnesse of tears to drink CHAP. XXII Of the Consideration of humane misery MIserable thou art wheresoever thou be or whithersoever thou turnest unlesse thou turne thy selfe un to God 2 Why art thou troubled when things succeed not as thou wouldst or desirest for who is he that hath all things accoording to his mind 3 Neither I nor thou nor any man upon the earth there is none in this world be he King or Pope without some tribulation or other 4 Who is then in the best estate or condition even he who for God's sake can suffer affliction 5 Many weake and fraile men can say O what an happy life hath such a one how wealthy how mighty he is in how great honour and credit 6 But lift up thine eyes to the riches of heaven and thou shall perceive that all the goods of this life are nothing so be accounted of 7 They are very uncertain rather burthensome then delightfull because they are never enjoyed without carefulnesse and feare 8 Mans happinesse consisteth not in having abundance of wealth but a meane estate should content him it is truly misery enough even to live upon the earth 9 The more a man hungreth after godlinesse the more he abhorreth this life because he seeth more cleerly and perceiveth more sensibly the defects of humane corruption 10 For to eat and to drink to sleep and to watch to labour and to rest and to be subject to other necessities of nature is doubtlesse a great misery to a devout mind that would gladly be free and delivered from sinne 11 For the inward man is much oppressed with these outward and corporall necessities whilst we live in this world 12 Therefore the holy Prophet prayeth with great devotion to be delivered from them saying draw me O Lord out of my necessities 13 But woe be to them that know not their owne misery and a greater woe to them that take delight in this miserable and corruptible life 14 And some there be so much dote upon it although with great labour and paines they can scarce get bread to eat yet could they live here alwaies they would care but litle for the Kingdome of heaven 15 O how mad are these in their braines and faithlesse in their hearts who lie so deeply drowned in the earth that they can think of nothing but earthly things 16 But miserable wretches as they are they shall in the end feele to their cost how vile and vaine that was which they loved 17 Whereas the Saints of God and all the fast friends of Christ looke not on those things which pleased the flesh and flourished for a time but panted after everlasting rreasures with all greedinesse and desire 18 Their whole desire was carried upward to things durable and invisible that the desire of things visible might not draw them to things below 19 O Brother loose not thy confidence to come forward in godlinesse there is yet time the houre is not yet past 20 Why wilt thou deferre thine amendment from day to day arise and begin this very instant and say now is the time to be doing now is the time to be working now is the best time to amend my selfe 21 When thou art ill at ease and much troubled then is the time to profit best thou must passe through fire and water before thou comest to a place of refreshing 22 Vnlesse thou offer violence to thy selfe thou shalt never get the victory over sinne so long as we carry about us this fraile body of ours we can never be without sinne or live without sorrow 23 We could gladly be quiet and freed from all misery but seeing by sin we have lost our innocency we have by that also forfeited our felicity 24 Therefore we must hold our selves content and expect the mercy of God till this our iniquitie be put away and this mortality of ours be swallowed up of life 25 O how great is humane frailty which is alwaies prone to evill to day thou confessest thy sinnes and to morrow thou committest the very same thou hast confessed 26 Now thou art in the mind to looke well unto thy waies and within a while thou so behavest thy selfe as though thou hadst never any such mind at all 27 Good cause have we therefore to humble our selves and never to have any great conceit of our worth we are so fraile in our nature so inconstant in our courses 28 Besides that may quickly be lost by our owne negligence which by the grace of God and our owne great paines we have scarce at length obtained 29 What will become of us in the end who begiu to waxe cold so timely 30 Woe be unto us if we will now give our selves to ease as if all were in peace and safetie when yet there appeareeh no signe of sanctity in our conversations 31 We have need like young beginners be newly instructed againe to good manners if happily there be any hope of our future amendment and spirituall progresse CHAP. XXIII Of the meditation of Death THere will very quickly be an end of thee here therefore see what will become of thee hereafter To day a man to morrow none and out of sight out of mind 2 O the stupidity and hardnesse of mans heart who thinketh only upon the present and hath no care of the time to come 3 Thou shouldst so order thy selfe in all thy thoughts and actions as if to day yea this very moment thou we it ready to depart 4 Hadst thou a clear conscience thou wouldst not greatly feare death care not so much for the death of this body as the sinne of thy soule 5 If thou art not prepared to day how wilt thou be prepared to morrow thou knowest not what will be to morrow and how knowest thou that thou shalt live till to morrow 6 What are we the better to live long if we prove not the better by long living for length of daies doth oftnes make our sinnes the greater then our lives the better 7 O that we had spent but one day well in this world 8 Many keepe in mind how long it is since their conversion and yet forget to fructifie in a holy conversation 9 If to die be accounted dreadfull to live long may prove more dangerous happy is he that hath his end before his eies and prepareth himselfe to die daily 10 If at any time thou hast seen an other man die make account thou must follow him he hath shewed thee but the way 11 When it is morning think thou maist die before night and when evening comes presume not upon next morning 12 Be thou therefore alwaies in a readinesse and so lead thy life that death may never take thee unprepared 13 Many die suddenly and when they look not for it for the sonne of man will come when we think not of his comming 14
sorrowful and desolate 13 Thou doest therefore foolishly if thou doest trust or rejoyce in any other It is better for theâ— to have all the world against thee then Iesus offended with thee 14 Amongst all things therefore that be deare unto thee let Iesus alone be thy chiefest beloved 15 Love all for Iesus but Iesus for himselfe Iesus Châ—ist alone is especially to be beloved who alone is found to be good and faithfull above all friends 16 For him and in him let aswell friends as foes be deare unto thee and all these are to be prayed for that all may know and love him 17 Never desire to be singularly commended or beloved for that appertaineth only unto God who hath none like unto himselfe 17 Neither doe thou desire that the heart of any should be set on thee nor doe thou set thy heart on the love of any but let Iesus be in thee and in every vertuous and good man 18 Be pure and free within and intangle not thy heart with any creaâ—â—re Thou oughtest to be as it were naked and carry a pure heart to God if thou wilt consider and prove and see how sweet our Lord is 19 And truly unlesse thou be prevented and drawen by his grace thou shalt never attaine to that happinesse to forsake and cast away all that thou alone maist be united to him alone 20 For when the grace of God commeth unto a man then he is strong and nothing is hard unto him and when it goeth away he is poore and weake and as it were left unto the will of whomsoever will afflict him 21 In this thou oughtest not to be dejected nor despaire but to resigne thy selfe with all indifferency unto the wâ—ll of God and to â—eare all things that befall thee for the glory of Christ. 22 For after winter followeth summer after night commeth day after a tempest faire weather CHAP. IX Of the want of all comfort IT is 〈◊〉 great matter to despise humane 〈◊〉 when we have divine or to negâ—â—â— divine when we have humane 2 It 〈…〉 and very much to be able to wanâ— both humane and divine comfort 2 And for the honour and glory of God to be willing to endure desolation of heart and to seeke himselfe in nothing nor to regard his owne good actions 3 What great matter is it if thou be cheerfull and devout at the comming of heavenly grace This houre is wâ—â—shed for of all men 4 He rideth easily whom the grace of God carrieth And what marvaile if he feele not his burden who is borne up by the Almighty and led by the greatest guide 5 We are alwaies willing to have something for our comfort and a man doth hardly put off and forsake himself The holy Martyr S. Laurence overcame the world with his Prelate 6 Because he despised whatsoever seemed delightsome in the world and for the love of Christ he patiently suffered the high Priest of God S. Siâ—tus to be taken from him whom he most loved 7 He overcame therefore the love of man by the love of the Creator and he rather chose the divine pleasure then humane comfort 8 See thou also learne to forsake some necessary thing and a beloved friend for the love of God 9 Be not grieved when thou art forsaken by a friend knowing that we all at length must be separated one from another 10 A man must fight long and with a constant mind before he gâ—â— the victory and be able to place his whole heart in God 11 When a man trusteth in himselfe he easily slideth unto humane comforts 12 But a true lover of Christ and a diligent follower of vertue giveth not himselfe to such solace nor seeketh sensible sweetnesse but rather forcible exercises and to sustaine hard labours for Christ. 13 When therefore spirituall comfort is given thee from God receive it thankfully but know that it is the gift of God not any desert of thine 14 Be not puffed up joy not too much neither doe thou presume vainly but be rather the more humble for that grace and more wary and fearefull in all thy actions for that houre will passe away and temptation will succeed 15 When consolation is taken from thee despaire not presently but with humility and patience attend the heavenly visitation for God is able againe to give thee greater consolation 16 This is not new nor strange unto them that have experience in the way of God for in the great Saints and ancient Prophets there was oftentimes such kind of alteration 17 For which cause one when he had grace said I said in my prosperity I shall never be removed 18 But when this was gone from him he addeth what he found in himselfe saying Thou turnedst thy face from me and I became troubled 19 Yet doth he not despaire in the midst of these changes but more earnestly prayeth unto our Lord and saith Vnto thee O Lord I will cry and I will pray unto my God 20 Lastly he receiveth the fruit of his prayer and witnesseth that he was heard saying Our Lord hath heard me and taken pity on me our Lord is become my helper 21 But wherein Thou hast turned saith he my sorrow into joy and thou hast compassed me about with gladnesse 22 If great Saints have been so dealt with all we that are poore and weake ought not to despaire if we be sometimes fervent and sometimes cold 23 For the spirit commeth and goeth according to the good pleasure of his will for which cause blessed Iob saith Thou visitest him early in the morning and suddainly thou provest him 24 Whereupon therefore can I hope or wherein ought I to trust but in the great mercy of God alone and in the onely hope of heavenly grace 25 For whether I enjoy the presence of good men or devout brethren or faithfull friends or holy Bookes or learned treatises or sweet songs and himmes 26 All these helpe litle and have litle savour when grace forsaketh me and I remaine left in my owne poverty 27 At such a time there is no better remedy then patience and the resigning of my selfe unto the will of God 28 I never found any so religious and devout that hath not had sometimes a with drawing of grace or felt not a decrease of fervour 29 There was never Saint so highly rapt and illuminated who first or last was not tempted 30 For he is not worthy of the high contemplation of God who hath not been exercised with some tribulation for God's sake 31 For temptation going before is wont to be a signe of ensuing comfort And unto those that are proved by temptations heavenly comfort is promised He that shall overcome saith he I will give him to eate of the tree of life 32 But divine comfort is given that a man may be stronger to beare adversities There followeth also temptation lest we should waxe proud of that good 33 The Divell sleepeth not neither is our flesh as yet dead
11 Alas what a kind of life is this where tribulations and miseries are never wanting where all is set with snares and compassed with enemies 12 For when one tribulation oâ— temptation goeth away another commeth yea and during the first conflict also many others come unlooked for one after another 13 And how can a life be loved that hath so many afflictions and is subject to so many calamities and miseries 14 How is it called a life that begetteth so many deaths and plagues And yet it is loved and many seeke to delight themselves therein 15 The world is oftentimes blamed that it is deceiptfull and vaine and yet it is not easily forsaken because the inclinations of our flesh doe too much over-rule us 16 Some things draw us to love it others to contemne it To the love of the world doe draw us the concupiscence of the flesh the concupiscence of the eyes and the pride of life 17 But the paines miseries that doe justly follow them cause a hatred and loathsomnesse thereof 18 But alas wicked pleasure overcommeth the mind which is given over to the world and shee esteemeth it a delight to be under thornes because she hath neither seene nor tasted the sweetnesse of God and the inward delight of vertue 19 But they that perfectly contemne the world and endeavour to live to God under holy discipline 20 These are not ignorant of the divine sweetnesse promised to the true forsakers of the world and doe more cleerely see how grievously the world erreth and how it is many waies deceaved CHAP. XXI That we are to rest in God above all his gifts ABove all things and in all things my soule thou shalt ever rest in God for he is the everlasting rest of the saints 2 Grant me most sweet loving Iesu to rest in thee above all creatures above all health and beauty above all glory and honour 3 Above all power and dignity above all knowledge and learning above all riches and arts above all joy and gladnesse 4 Above all fame and praise above all sweetnesse and comfort above all hope and promise above all merit and desire 5 Above all gifts and presents that thou canst give and impart unto us above all joy and jubily that the mind of man can receive and feele 6 Lastly above Angels and Archangels and above all the heavenly Host above all visible and invisible things and above all that thou my God art not 7 For that thou my Lord God surpassest all thou alone art most high thou alone most powerfull thou alone most full and sufficient thou alone most sweet and comfortable 8 Thou alone most beautifull and loving thou alone most noble and glorious above all things in whom all good things together both perfectly are and ever have been and shall be 9 And therefore it is too litle and not sufficient whatsoever thou bestowest on me besides thy selfe or revealest unto me of thy selfe or promisest whiles thou art not seen and not fully obtained 10 For surely my heart cannot rest nor be fully contented unlesse it rest in thee and surmount all gifts and creatures whatsoever 11 O my most beloved spouse Christ Iesus the most chast lover the governour of all creatures who will give me wings of true liberty to fly and rest in thee 12 O when shall it be fully graunted me to consider in quietnes of mind and see how sweet thou my Lord God art 13 When shall I fully recollect my selfe in thee that for thy love I may not feele my selfe but thee alone above all sense and feeling in a manner not commonly known 14 But now I oftentimes lament and bear my infelicity with griefe 15 For that many evills occurre in this vale of miseries which doe often trouble grieve and darken mee 16 Often hinder and distract me allure and intangle mee 17 To the end I should not have free accesse unto thee and that I should not enjoy those sweet and heavenly imbracings which thou alwaies givest to the blessed and celestiall spirits Let my sighs and manifold desolation on earth moove thee 18 O Iesus splendor of eternall glory comfort of the pilgrime soule with thee is my tongue without voyce and my silence speaketh unto thee 19 How long doth my Lord delay to come Let him come unto me his poore servant and make mee glad 20 Let him put out his hand and deliver me miserable wretch from all anguish Come come blessed Lord for without thee I shall have no joyfull day nor houre 21 Thou art my joy and without thee there is nothing but want A wretched creature I am and in a manner imprisoned and Ioaden with irons 22 Vntill thou comfortest me with the light of thy presence and givest me liberty and shewest a favourable countenance unto me 23 Letothers seek what they please insteed of thee but for mee nothing else doth nor shall delight mee but thou only my God my hope my everlasting health 24 I will not hold my peace nor cease to pray untill thy grace returne againe and thou speak inwardly unto mee 25 Behold I am here behold I come unto thee because thou hast called upon mee 26 Thy teares and the desire of thy soule thy humility and the contrition of thy heart have inclined and brought me unto thee 27 And I said Lord I have called thee and have desired to enjoy thee being ready to forsake all things for thee For thou first hast stirred me up that I might seeke thee 28 Blessed be thou therefore O Lord that hast shewed this goodnes to thy servant according to the multitude of thy mercies 29 What hath thy servant more to say before thee but that he doe greatly humble himselfe in thy sight and be alwaies mindfull of his owne iniquity and basenesse 30 For there is none like unto thee in all whatsoever is wonderfull in heaven and earth Thy wordes are good thy judgements true and by thy providence all things are governed 31 Praise therefore and glory be unto thee O wisdome of the eternall Father let my tongue my soule and all creatures together praise and blesse thee CHAP. XXII Of the remembrance of the manifold benefits of God OPen O Lord my heart in thy Law and teach me to walke in thy commandements 2 Grant me to understand thy will and to remember thy benefits as well in generall as in particular with great reverence and diligent consideration that henceforward I may be able worthily to give thee thanks 3 But I know and confesse that I am not able to give thee due thanks for the favours which thou bestowest upon me even in the least moment 4 I am lesse then the least of all thy benefits bestowed upon me and when I consider the excellency of thy Majesty the greatnesse there of maketh my spirit to faint 5 All that we have in our soule body and whatsoever we possesse outwardly or inwardly naturally or spiriuallyl are thy benefits doe praise