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ID Title Author Corrected Date of Publication (TCP Date of Publication) STC Words Pages
A36978 The fool turn'd critick a comedy : as it was acted at the Theatre-Royall, by His Majesties servants / by T.D. ... D'Urfey, Thomas, 1653-1723. 1678 (1678) Wing D2728; ESTC R2353 47,714 65

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but the meer dregs of fancy you may believe me Madam Pen. Sir I 'le not presume to question it or doubt the truth of what you say though I confess it seems a little strange Tim. I grant it may Madam and by the way let me tell you another would not have found it out I have I thank my stars some certain guifts which others want 't is as Providence decree's every one has his Talent Pen. But not alike I hope Sir Tim. No Madam I hope to see that the truth is I love to be free and perhaps sityrical in my opinion and I doubt not but you are acquainted with the mode and know what becomes a Gentleman for faith should we not sometimes dive into the secrets of Wit and reprove mistakes these Rascally Poets would grow insolent there would be no living for 'em we should be so perpetually tormented with Lampoons but ' gad I cramp the Rascals Pen. Would thou wert crampt and gag'd so I were rid of thee Tim. You 'd laugh to see how afraid they are of me to'ther day Madam I went to see a Play and sitting 'mongst the rest in the Wits Corner I know not what but somewhat I mislik't and raised a hiss which presently was seconded by all the Wits But to see the poor fellow the Poet peep out between the Scenes and shake his empty head to see his Ten Months labour so rewarded would have made you die with Laughter ha ha ha Small In this Madam you rather condemn my Judgment then excuse your want of merit But give me leave to tell you if I have any Wit you are a woman of great parts Do you see that Gentleman Bett. Yes Sir methinks a man of Excellent good Parts Small He is so yet this this Modish Gallant that 's now so brisk and ayrie did I within these three dayes draw out of a lump of ignorance a wretched lump a thing of nothing mould stampt and fram'd him as you see and of a Coxcomb changd'd him to a Courtier a Modish fellow and the Son of Fortune Sir your Verses you forget that Tim. Hush I warrant thee Madam to let you see that what I speak is Reason you shall your self be judge I have a Copy of Verses here given me by one of the Poets who desir'd my opinion of 'em ah here they are Madam I 'le read 'em to you hum 't is an Encomium on his Mistress Best of thy Sex and brighter then the Moon At her full Glory or the Sun at Noon Sweet as a bed of Roses far above All th●t ever yet pretend to Love For thou appear'st as if thou would perswade Men to believe for thee Love first was made Or that the bliss of nature should contest With the delightful Lodging of thy breast Zealots release the blessings heapt above Of lasting Raptures and immortal Love But Iove and all his Crowd of joyes should be Dispis'd and slighted for a tast of thee This and a great deal more such stuffe is here such much ' gad I am e'en sick to read it Pen. Methinks they are very well Sir only a little too full of rapture and flattery but that may be born withall Tim. Well Madam I see your design ha ha ha to bantor the poor fellow but ' twon't do what answer do you think I made what de' e think I did with 'em Pen. Why I suppose Sir you spoke indifferently and the less critically because you intended to encourage him Tim. Encourage him ' dsdeath encourage a Poet I 'de sooner do 't to a Cutpurse and more good I shall get by him no Madam I damn'd it damn'd it to the Center Pen. But Sir you had no reason for 't the verses did not deserve it Tim. Pish that 's no matter it quell'd the Rascalls hopes why should I have encouraged him and prais'd what he had writ 't is ten to one within this twelve months he would have writ a Play and made a Character of me but ' gad I dash't his hopes his Muse and he will hardly be reconcil'd this month through the fright I put him in Pen. Well this is the most intollerable Fop that ever I saw there 's no enduring him Aside Sir For. And let me have that Mannor too incerted as a Covenant for repairs and fail not on 't tomorrow Exit Lawyer Pray Sir give your excuse 't is only a little parcel of Land which I determine for my Daughters Joynture but come le ts in to Dinner by this time 't is ready and once more welcome to my house Small I am too poor in thanks Whispers Tim. Tim. I am too poor in thanks Sir softly you Rogue Sir For. Ah not poor in any thing good Mr. Winelove 'faith I do not like it but come no Ceremony I beseech you but to Dinner Exeunt SCENE III. Landskip Enter Bernard and Frank to Fight Ber. The cause of my quarrel Sir you cannot be ignorant of knowing who I am and how you have betrayed me Fran. My answer lyes in this not in my words come come you are too tedious Ber. O this shews your courage Sir but believe you shall have sighting work enough e're I kill yee as certainly I shall before we part Frank. Why then the Surgeon 's paid Sir come we lose time then once more at you Sir Enter Winelove Senior Old Wine How now what 's here Swords drawn and Fighting ah that my Tim. were here now to put in for a third man but I 'le try what I can do to part 'em Gentlemen hold hold you 've fought enough hold hold I say Draws and goes to part ' em Fran. Hark Reverend Sir 't will become your gravity to retire a while and not disturb us least that portly shape of yours be discommoded pox on him h 'as given me another thinking while Old Wine Faith he sayes true I was too rash well Gentlemen since you will have it so fight it out bravely and I 'le stand by and see fair play on both sides Fran. You see your fortune Sir Ber. is disarmed Ber. Yes and contemn'd it and my life too seeing 't is at thy mercy Fran. You will do well to cherish it for all that Sir Old Wine A brave fellow this and I 'le warrant a right Courtier he has the true way on 't now would I give twenty pound my Tim. were here Ber. Ah Sir to insult I know is Customary Fran. To insult to let thee see how far I am from it there there 's thy Sword again and give me thy hand I could wish I could as easily give back thy Mistress but our Stars would have it otherwise thou knowest we can't appoint our own destinies besides thou hast another Mistress and two at once is too much in reason for any one man Ber. 'T is true I have another Mistress perhaps fairer then 'tother whom I intend to visit as soon as this hurt Arm is drest but what excuses can you bring from that