wise men agen Touch. To the poynt good gentlemen yet you are welcome Gil. Troth sir the poynt is this You know and the towne has tane sufficient notice of it that there has been a long contention betwixt you and old Mr. Striker your neighbour Touch. Ha Gil. And the cause or ground of your quarrell for ought any body knowes but your selves may be as triviall as that which was derided in our fathers Touch. Are you there with me Gil. And great hopes there are and wagers laid by your friends on both sides that you two will be friends Touch. I le hold you an hundred pounds o' that Gil. Nay more that Mr. Striker will bee willing to give his Grand-child to your Son so you 'l give your consent Touch. And your comming is to perswade that is it not if it be so speake deale plainely with me gentlemen whilst yet you are welcome Walt. Insooth it is so we come to negotiate the match for your sonne and your friendship with old Mr. Striker Touch. You are not welcome Gil. But when you weigh the reasons and consider the perfect love of the yong paire and how the world will praise your reconciliation and blesse the providence that made their loves the meanes to worke their parents charity Touch. Againe you are not welcome Gil. Your selfe but now commended the attonement Of our two fathers wrought by the same meanes I meane my marriage with his sister here Against as great an opposition Walt. But our fathers lov'd their children Touch. Your fathers were a couple of doting fooles and you a paire of sawcy knaves now you are not welcome and more then so get you out of my doores Gil. Will you sir by your wilfulnesse cast away your sonne Touch. My sonne no sonne of mine I have cast him off already for casting an eye upon the daughter of mine enemy let him goe let him packe let him perish he comes not within these doores and you that are his fine spoken spokes-men get you off o' my ground I charge you Walt. We are gone sir onely but wishing you Mr. Touchwood to remember that your sonne 's your sonne Touch. Indeffinitely not sir untill hee does not onely renounce all interest in the love of that baggage but doe some extraordinary mischiefe in that family to right me for the trespasse hee has done and so win my good opinion till which bee done a daily curse of mine hee shall not misse and so you may informe him Exit Gil. What an uncharitable wretch is this Walt. The touchiest peece of Touchwood that e're I met withall Gil. I fear'd we should inflame him Walt. All the comfort is his sonne may yet out-live him Act 1. Scene 2. Walter Gilbert Samuel Gil. BUt the danger is his father may dis-inherit him Walt. He cannot be so devillish here comes his sonne a gentleman of so sweet a disposition and so contrary to his crabbed Sire that a man who never heard of his mothers vertue might wonder who got him for him Gil. Not at all I assure you Sam is his fathers nowne sonne for the old man you see is gentle enough till he be incens'd and the sonne being mov'd is as fiery as the father Walt. But he is very seldome and slowly mov'd his father often and o' the suddaine Gil. I prethee would'st thou have greene wood take fire as soone as that which is old and sere Walt. He is deepe in thought Gil. Over head and eares in his Mrs. contemplation Sam. To dis-obey a father is a crime In any sonne unpardonable Is this rule So generall that it can beare noe exception Or is a fathers power so illimitable As to command his sonnes affections And so controule the Conquerour of all men Even Love himselfe no he that enterprizes So great a worke forgets he is a man And must in that forget he is a father And so if he forgoe his nature I By the same Law may leave my Piety But stay I would not lose my selfe in following This wild conceit Gil. How now Sam whither away Sam. I was but casting how to find the way Unto my selfe Can you direct me gentlemen Walt. Yes yes your father has told us the way Sam. Ha you had conference with him ha yee speake Gil. Marry sir ha we and I thinke to purpose Sam. Ha you wonne ought upon him to my advantage Walt. As much as may restore you to acquaintance With him againe can you but make good use on 't Sam. Pray doe not trifle with me tell me briefly Gil. Briefly he sayes you must not dare to see him Nor hope to receive blessing to the valew Of a new three-pence till you disclaime your love In your faire Annabell and not onely so But you must doe some villanous mischievous act To vexe his adversary her Grand-father Or walke beneath his curse in banishment Sam. A most uncharitable and unnaturall sentence Walt. But thinke withall it is your father that Makes this decree obey him in the 'execution He has a great Estate you are his onely sonne Doe not lose him your fortune and your selfe For a fraile peece of beauty shake her off And doe some notable thing against her house To please your father Sam. The Divell speakes it in thee And with this spell I must Conjure him out Draw Gil. Oh friend you are too violent Sam. Hee 's too desperate To urge me to an act of such injustice Can her faire love to whom my faith is given Be answered with so loud an injury Or can my faith so broken yield a sound Lesse terrible than thunder to affright All love and constancy out of the breast Of every Virgin that shall heare the breach Of my firme faith Gil. Be not so passionate Sam. I have no further power to doe an out-rage Against that Family to whome my heart Is link'd then to rip out this troubled heart The onely ominous cause indeed of all My over passionate fathers cruelty and that If I must needs doe an injurious Office Alone shall be my act to calme his fury Gil. Prethee blow o're this passion thou wert wont To affect wit and canst not be a Lover Truely without it Love is wit it selfe And through a thousand lets will find a way To his desired end Sam. The Ballet taught you that Gil. Well said Love will find out the way I see thou art comming to thy selfe againe Can there no shift no witty slight be found That have been common in all times and ages To blind the eyes of a weake-sighted father And reconcile these dangerous differences But by blood-shedding or outragious deeds To make the feud the greater recollect Thy selfe good Sam my house my purse my counsell Shall all be thine and Wat shall be thy friend Walt. Let me entreate your friendship Sam. And me your pardon Gil. So so all friends let 's home and there consult To lay the tempest of thy fathers fury Which cannot long be dangerous 't is but
bestow'd it well and wisely upon Chitty vace her zonne to make him a geantleman and told him what great house he coame on by her side for shee was a Striker forzooth and ga'n directions to vinde an old Uncle of his here in Cuckold-shire one Mr. Striker but virst shee bade him put his zelfe into vashion and bee sure to beare's zelfe like a Gentleman and he has ta'ne a wise course to compasse it it zeems I warrant he ha made a voole o' his voure hundred pound by this time Coult. Ay and o' his zelfe too as his Cony catchers ha handled him And you had zeen't you would ha' be pist your zelfe vor woe how they blooded him Tom. Ah Coult. And then how they spurg'd his guts out Tom. Ah Colt A Bots light on 'hem 't would ha made a dog zick to zeet how like a scalded pig he look'd Tom. Ha ha ha Coult. And then how they did veed'ne with a zort of zlip zlaps not all worth a' messe o' milke porredge to make him vine vorsooth Tom. Ah Coult. You le zee zuch an altrication in him as never was zeen in a brother Tom. But I wo'not zee'n yet as voule a Clowne as I am and as vine a gentleman as he is I have a tricke i' my skonce to make a yonger brother o' me Coul. I that would be zeene now Tom. I ha 't and 't is a vine one I came to London to zeeke the voole my brother and ha the same directions from our Curate to whom my mother told all that Tim had to vinde his uncle Strikers house and I ha quir'd it out and this is it and thou zhalt zee what I chill doe now wh'are within Act 4. Scene 2. Enter Friswood to them Fris. Who would you speak with Tom. By your leave vorsooth I would speake with the Mr. o' the house I understand his worships name is Mr. Striker Fris. He is so sir but he is not in case to buy any cattell at this time Tom. Nor doe I come to zell'n any my comming is of a dead bodyes errand vorsooth Fris. What strange fellow is this troe Tom. I pray vorsooth and you bee old enough as it zeems you be to remember when my mother was a maid did you know a zuster of Mr. Strikers that was married into Zummerzet shire Fris. What was her name I pray Tom. Her Cursen name was Audry she zed and a Striker she as bevore she was married but my vather made a Hoyden Fris. Hoyden Tom. Yes Hoyden zo I zay there be very good vokes o' th name as you shall well know I cham one my zelfe and she neede not be asham'd I wusse o' the kin she coame on to hugger mugger it as she did to her dying day Fris. Most wonderfull but is she dead Tom. Yes vaith she 's dead and as sumptiously buried though I zay 't as any yeomans wife within ten mile of Tanton any time these ten and twenty yeare Fris. Pray what were you to her Tom. I tell you my vather married her and I should bee her zonne I thinke Fris. Good heaven how things will come about Tom. Coulter keep thy countenance Coulter I le make 'hem believe I am her very naturall zonne zee what will come on 't Coult. I le keepe my countenance and zet a vace on 't too and need be Fris. Your Vncle Striker at this time is very sicke sir but I will acquaint him with your desire pray walke into the next roome the while sir Tom. If he should dye now Coulter and make me his heire Coult. I marry Mr. so you might make a better journey on 't then the gentleman your brother Ex. Fris. This to me is the greatest wonder of all that I am presently possess'd of my Mrs. sullen sicknes which has ee'n drawn him to deaths doore and my Mistresses unfortunable condition are nothing to this Country Hoydens relation Act 4. Scene 3. Enter Touchwood O Mr. Touchwood you are the welcom'st Gentleman that ever could come into so heavy a house Touch. A stinking one it is I am sure that nasty carrion thy Mr. is i' my nose already I think I were best goe no further Fris. Let not the sadnesse of this place dismay you Touch. But is he dead already ha Fris. Not altogether dead sir Touch. The worse luck and how does your Mistris ha ha ha well well I say nothing Fris. She is in bodily health sir but very sad and much disconsolate poore Damsell Touch. Not for her Grandsire is she if the worst dogge hee keeps howle for him I le worry sheepe with mine owne teeth and trusse for him but why is she sad prethee tel me ha ha ha Fris. I marvaile at your mirth sir Touch. I would now give her a new Gowne to tell me the true cause that I might save mine oath and rore out my rejoycings t was a devillish tricke of the Rascalls to bind me by oath never to speake of it but to those that should tell me of it first I have such a coyle to keep it in now Prethee tell me what has the old Traveller that is now bound for the Low Countries gi'n thy Mrs. in his will canst tell Fris. Alas he is offended with her she has displeased him in somewhat that is the maine cause of his mortall sicknesse Touch. That 's my boy there boy there that was a home blow Fris. She comes not at him sir nor dares not see him do you know any thing by her sir Touch. No no no not I not I s'bones I bit my tongue too hard Fris. If you doe sir would you would speake a good word for her that he may dye in charity with her Touch. The jade jeeres me I le stay no longer i' the house Fris. Nay good sir say not so after so many messages and entreaties by all the best o' the parish and an exhortation made to you by the Minister himselfe did you vouchsafe to come and wil you now come short to see my Master now the Doctors have given him over and he is dying Touch. I confesse 't was my desire to see that dying that brought me hither where is he I le hold my nose and have at him Fris. I hope you wil be friends with him now sir for he 's ee'n a going Touch. Friends I le rather goe with him and fight it out by the way Act 4. Scene 4. Enter Striker brought in a Chaire Curate Fris. Looke you sir here he is Touch, What up and in a Chaire Fris. Yes sir he will not yield by any perswasion to dye in his bed Touch. Then he may live to be hanged yet for ought I see Cur. See sir your neighbour Touchwood comes to be reconciled to you Touch. You are quite besides the book sir Domine I have no friends in hell to send to by him no sir I come to see him dye as he liv'd a hatefull miscreant Cur. Let me pray