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A07418 Astrologaster, or, The figure-caster Rather the arraignment of artlesse astrologers, and fortune-tellers, that cheat many ignorant people vnder the pretence of foretelling things to come, of telling things that are past, finding out things that are lost, expounding dreames, calculating deaths and natiuities, once againe brought to the barre. By Iohn Melton. Melton, John, Sir, d. 1640. 1620 (1620) STC 17804; ESTC S112560 60,603 93

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for Cattell They haue Saints also for Cattell as Saint Anthonie for Hogges Saint Loy for Horse and Kine Saint Gallus for Geese Saint Wendelin for Sheepe and Saint Gertrude poysoneth all Rats and Mice so that none of these Vermine were euer knowne to gnaw any Fryers Cheese or Bacon Saints for Diseases For Diseases they hold that Saint Iohn and Saint Valentine keepe Men especially Women from the Falling-sicknesse that Saint Anthonie heales all kinde of Fires though they be as hot as euer came out of any French Hospitall Saint Roch the Pestilence and that 's the cause they say so few of them dyed the last great plague-Plague-time Saint Roman restores all Mad people to their Wits Saint Iob is good for the Pocks Saint Appolin is as good at the Tooth-ach Saints 〈…〉 part of the Body A●●● for euery Limbe in M●ns 〈◊〉 they haue a Saint for S. O●●●a keepes the H●●d in stead of Aries S. Blasius is appo●●ted to goue●●e the Necke in stead of Taurus S. Lawr●nce keepes the Backe and Shoulders in stead of G●n●m Cancer and Leo S. Erasmus rules the Belly with 〈◊〉 ●ntrayles in the place of Libra and Scorpius in the stead of Sagittarius Capricornus Aquarius and Pisces the Holy Church of Rome hath elected S. Burgarde S. Rochus S. Quirinus S. Iohn and many others which gouerne the Thighes Feet Shinnes and Knees All these things being truly considered I admire there are so many Tradesmen breake so many great rich men dye and so many Sicknesses and Diseases in Italy and England seeing their Saints haue such power to driue theirs away and our Cunning Men and Women so many Charmes to fright away ours But sure if these things were true Doctors Apothecaries and Chirurgians would be as poore as Fidlers Poets and Alchymists But I will giue as much credit to the Romish Saints as to our English Mountebanks Spirits which were first inuented by subtill Fryers and craftie Knaues only to beguile the poore people of their Money It may be Sir at the first you supposed me to be because of my plaine Countrey Habit a Woodcocke fit for your Sprindge but to be plaine with you Sir your Worship is deceiued of me for I can perceiue you to be an arrant Knaue for your trickes are so thin and sleight that a Man of a very dim vnderstanding may see cleane through them Your discourse is neyther knit together with the Nerues of Vnderstanding Wit Art Iudgement or Discretion it hath no Realitie or Essence in it but you huddle a companie of Astronomicall words together wanting both Coherence Methode and Congruitie you powre out whole Dictionaries of strange Words talke as though you could repeat Dutch Gallobelgicus or English Hollings-head without booke ●●●●●pulent 〈◊〉 and lye as if you had held Herodotus Penne while hee writ the Nine Muses To tell you true Sir I came not hither to find out a Chayne for indeede I haue lost none but first to find out then to expresse your Roguerie therefore I thinke if you had beene a true Wizard it were impossible I should put a Tricke vpon you that is so excellent at the most Cousening Cheating and Conycatching Art of Astrologie I perceiue by your sweating I am very tedious to you but good Sir be patient for I haue giuen your Tongue an vncontroulable libertie to speake in the defence of your Art that hath been so beneficiall to you therefore I hope you will giue me leaue if not I now will be so bold as to take it to speake in the disprayse of it because it hath beene so preiudiciall to many Ordo praepostorus Confutatio vulgaris If Figure-Casting be an Art or Science why is it not a Liberall Science as well as all the other or why is it not studied as freely and as lawfully as the rest but that the Professor of it is forced to flye into such by places darke Corners and Garden-Allyes as these If you are ashamed to shew the reasons I will not but truely reueale them which are either because the generall eye of the world may not take notice of the foolery of those people and so giue them warning or that the roguery of you that entice them may not be apparant and so you come to a deserued punishment Or that you may bee thought more famous in the opinion of the ignorant who suppose that such melancholy places best suite with such as study these Arts. Figure-Casters Cunning Men and Women This may appeare by the cunning Man on the Bank-side Mother Broughton in Chicke-Lane yong Master Oliue in Turnebole-street the shag-hair'd Wizard in Pepper-Alley the Chirurgion with the Bag-pipe Cheeke Doctor Fore-man at Lambeth and you here in More-fields and many such Impostors that like the Birds of Wonder flye the light of the Citie Againe there is no Art or Science but the definition shewes the excellencie of it Grammar is the Science of speaking and writing truly Grammar the Fountaine and Originall of all Arts. Logicke the Art of Arts Logicke the Science of Sciences that makes way for the beginning of all Methodes and an Art that by disputing finds out the Truth Rhetoricke is an Art Rhetoricke teaching to speake elegantly by Tropes and Figures Arithmaticke is the Doctrine of Numbers Arithmaticke Musicke the harmonious facultie of weighing the differences of Sounds by Sence and Reason Musicke Geometrie the Discipline of Immoueable Greatnesses Geometrie and the contemplatiue description of Formes Astronomie a certaine Law and Rule Astronomie considering the Motion of Superior Bodyes Philosophie the knowledge of Diuine and Humane things Philosophie ioyned with the studie of liuing well Physicke the Art of curing and healing the sicke and diseased Physicke But for your Astrologie your Sacred Astrologie your Diuine Astrologie I neuer read that any Diuine Father or Preacher euer gaue any commendable description of it Indeed some of that wise Sect you professe your selfe to be of haue endeuoured to illustrate and beautifie with one of whose Authoritie I will not allow of because Diuinitie the Queene and Mistresse of the Arts doth deny it Therefore because there is no true description of this Art if the Students of it will thinke themselues beholding to me I will furnish them with one A new and true description of Astrologie AStrologie i● an Art whereby Cunning Knaues cheat plaine honest Men that teacheth both the Theory and Practicke of close Cousenage a Science instructing all the Students of it to lye as often as they speake and to be beleeued no oftner then they hold their Tongues that tells truth as often as Bawds goe to Church Witches or Whores say their Prayers or neuer but when the English Nones and the Greeke Calends meet together This is the true description of your Art Now the vertue and power of your Art is to calculate Deaths and Natiuities cast Figures finde out things that it may be were neuer lost
walke let them but reade the Scriptures and they shall find it to be most false for that affirmes that the Soules of the good instantly goe to Heauen and of the bad instantly to Hell therefore their Spirits cannot wander Againe the Soule that is in Heauen minds no earthly matter and it was neuer knowne that any Soule euer returned out of Hell for the Poets themselues say Nullus redditurus ab Orco But these Images and Tricks of the Fryers do but resemble the Statues of Negromancers made with great toyle and labour Fryer Bacon Albertus Magnus For Fryer Bacon was many yeeres before hee could make his Head speake And the Image of Albertus Magnus was to be wondred at which hee made in the full and perfect shape of a Man who with the Wheeles and other Engines that he had cunningly artificially wrought in it made it speake and pronounce words as distinctly as if they did proceed from a man indued with sence and reason This Statue Thomas Aquinas when Thomas Aquinas was sent into his Chamber where it lay hid heard it speake very articulately which when he heard then looking for it and finding it and viewing it very seriously at last strucke it with a Club and brake it all to pieces Which when Albertus heard and saw he cryed out and said Thomas thou hast destroyed the worke of thirtie yeeres labour and paines Now can any man iudge that either Bacon or Albertus made these vnder any Constellation or that it spake by the influence of any Starre if they doe they are wretchedly deceiued for it was either by a materiall Engine or the Deuill that spake within them brought into them by their Art Therefore wee may perswade our selues that all these Images made by the Art either of a Fryer or Negromancer are vnlawfull to be made of them or vsed of any other These Images lawfull But if we must allow any Statue or Image they must be those of Pasquil and Morphirius on whose brests were written no Lie-Bills as the Popes called them but True-Bills of their villanies These Statues were of stone and the verses carued on their brests were bitter and Satyricall sharply reuiling the Sorcery Sodomitry Symony Incest Phil. Can. p. Medita c●n● Murther Witchcraft Poysoning and Sacriledge of the Popes and Cardinals whereupon the Gentlemen of Rome wittily sayd That it was not lawful for men to speake there vices the stones did proclaym them But pope Adrian would haue taken an order and haue them flung into Tyber Pope Adrian Suessanus if Suessanus the Legate of Charles the Emperour who fauored them had not preuented him who sayd to his Holinesse that if they were flung into Tyber the Crocodiles and Rats and other monstrous Serpents would catch them and sing them to which answer some report the holy Father stood as mute as one of his Cardinals Mules but some report that he began to be angry at Suessanus answer and in a rage suddenly sayde that he would haue them burnt to whom the Legate wittily replyed againe saying If you burne these Images their ashes will not be blowne through the citie but into other countreys so that the people will take occasion to celebrate and reuerence those Ashes for the writing sake and so it will come to passe that they being dispersed throgh the world the sinnes of Rome will generally be knowne to all nations At this second answer his Holinesse wae more perplexed then before and seeing he could doe no good either by drowning or burning hee bid them stand in the Deuills name But I haue made too long a digression therfore I will returne againe to our Negromancers and now I haue spoken of their Images I will briefly and plainely lay open the viperous generation of Negromancy which are Idolatry Diuination and vaine obseruasion with all the hellish brood that proceeds from them The damnable ofspring of Negromancy IDolatry is a Diuine Worship attributted to Idols which Idolls are Statues or Images which the Gentiles worshipped with Diuine Honour Idolatry the daughter of Negromancy beleeuing there was some diuinitie in them by reason of their answers and wonderfull effects the Deuill wrought in them Such were the Images of Hermes Tresmegistus otherwise called Mercurie in which they did beleeue that by a kinde of Art the soules of Deuills and Angels were encluded vnder a certaine Constellation which Diuinitie and Naturall Phylosophy doth reprehend for they hold that a Spirit cannot possibly bee vegitable Notae Aristotle de Anima or can substantially informe artificiall bodyes For the Soule as Aristotle saith is an Act of a naturall body not artificiall for a man cannot by any matter as Herbs Wood Stone Words or Constellation expell a good or bad Spirit or being cald that it can come presently and dwell in an Idoll because corporall things cannot by any naturall order haue any operation in incorporall things There haue beene some of the Gentiles that haue not onely attributed Diuine honour to Statues and Images but beleeued them to be Gods for some vertue or magnitude of their Acts these Statues represented as to Iupiter Hercules Venus and the rest and other monsters of this kinde Also they did not onely honour corporall but incorporall things as Intelligences Angels and the Soules of heauenly Bodyes which they call Aeria Animalia and they did not separate the soules of men from Diuine honour which is most diuellish This kinde of Idolatrie at these dayes is vsed among our Antagonists the Papists for they pray to Iron Papists Wood Gold Siluer and woodden Images that haue neither sight feeling sence life or operation in them and haue as small influence in them after are made either by the Caruer or Goldsmiths hand as they had when they first were in a massie lumpe either in the Tree or Mine Diuination the 2. daughter of Negromancie Isidor lib. octa Etymologia The second daughter of superstition is Diuination by which our Astrologers miserably labour to know of future things either good or bad These are they Isidorus saith report themselues to be full of diuination who by craft and deuice foretell of things to come by the effects which proceed vpon necessitie from causes vnlesse they are especially hindered of God certainly proceeding from the cause of nature as the eclipse of the Sunne and the Moone and the effects which proceed from these causes may bee foretold of by as probable coniecture as well as a Mariner may foretell of a storme that will arise by a darke cloude that is either before or behinde him Haue not many olde women told by the vnhappy conditions of a boy that he would be hangd and hath it not falne out right Haue not many graue Matrons foretold that young wanton Lasses would proue Wagtails hath it not come to passe Haue not many men by the damnable tricks they haue seene in Catchpoles foretold that they would proue knaues and
vaporum ex vorasitare cruditate in caput redundantium The Sanguine complexion from the aboundance of blood causeth men to dreame of the Incubus which Physitians hold is the cause of a future Apoplexie And that is the reason that many ignorant people that are of sanguine complexion and feed on flesh egges veale and drink wine and such like which causeth blood that beleeue that in their sleepes they often feele the Night-mare or an Incubus which is nothing else but a disease arising of vapors disturbing those that are at repose in the night whose externall force doth seeme to euade their sences and to presse their bodyes with their ponderous weight and this is the reason that Phisitians hold that the Incubus is a sign of a future Apoplexie because the Apoplexie is a stupefaction of the Nerues in the whole body with a priuation of the sence and motion Apoplexia slupefactio neruorum totius corporis cum priuatione sensus motus a verbo Graeco 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 quod est percuti● attonitum reddo Againe some hold that the cause of dreames ariseth from the businesse and affaires a man is most imployed in the day time so that the impression of them sticking in the Table of the Fantasie makes a man dream of those things in the night which he hath done in the day as for example Men giuen to drinke much often dreame that they are in the bottome of some noble mans seller drinking of healths And men according to their employments dreame of their businesse ouer night Your Lawyer he dreames of Angels a most blessed dreame and if he chance to talke in his sleepe it is most commonly of Demurs Habeas Corpusses Sissararas Writs Latitats and Procidendos The Phisitian he dreames of a great Plague and if he talks it is of nothing but Purgations Vomits Glisters and Pills I knew a Player dreamt that his braines were beaten out with the Corke of groate Bottle of Ale and as he was speaking the Prologue it hist at him because he spake it so scuruily The Cutpurse and the Catchpole most commonly dreame of a Michaelmas Terme for that is their best time to picke pockets and cheat in and so of all the rest according to their imployments therefore this makes mee not of Symonides opinion who held that all dreames are sent from God which all honest men will deny because they know that God is not the author of any ill Again dogs and kine dream especially when they haue lost their whelps or calues who suddenly will wake out of their sleeps run howling lowing into diuers places to finde them Nor must we beleeue these Negromancers in their diuellish worke of working in our Fantasies by dreames that they can doe any thing that is true as when they cause vs dream of gold or siluer we chance to find it instantly to affirme with many old women that all dreames are true for this is but a tricke of the deuill to bring vs into superstition which tricke is not much vnlike that he hath put vpon the Papists making them beleeue that at the sight of the Crosse he cannot be in quiet but must flie away from it but there is no true Christian will thinke that the Deuill is afrayd of a peece of wood gold or siluer but flyes from the Crosse of purpose to draw them into the superstition of adoring the crosse The Deuills tricke in flying from the crosse and kneeling to it instead of adoring him that once hung on the Crosse for although it bee a Crosse yet it hath no more vertue and influence in it then when it was a peece of wood stone or siluer Thus then you see we must trust to no dreams except they come by the inspiration of God and the Holy Ghost of which God spake in the 12. of Numbers I will speake to him in a dreame this was now by a good Angell that God warned Ioseph to flye into Aegypt And oftentimes God suffereth the Euill Angel to delude the minds of men The euill Angell so that many times they haue beene banquetting with gallant Ladies and by the phantasticall illusion of the Deuill thinke that they haue beene in the company of diuers women that rid on the backs of Cats Dogs Hogs or that they haue beene sayling on the maine Sea in ships no bigger then egge shells that in the peace of midnight they haue trauelled through many parts of the world Holy Iob prayeth against such illusions saying Thou doest terryfie me by dreames and dost shake me with horror by visions There are many Monks as the Golden Legend testifies S. Dominicus that report this of their holy S. Dominicus that his mother before he was borne dreamt that she bare a huge dog in her wombe holding a burning firebrand in his mouth who entering into the world set it on fire This dreame the holy Monkes did thus expound that the vision was not vaine seeing Preachers in the Scriptures are called Dogs But I will giue then a truer exposition then this not sparing their Holy Order It was certaine that this Dominicke was the author of one of the foure Mendicant Orders and the first that found out the burning and firing of the Professors of the Gospell Therefore his Imitators haue peculiarly challenged to themselues the Inquisition and many other such places to exercise their Fire and Sword And so by this was signified the burning Fire-brand Dominicus held in his mouth by which an infinite company of godly men were consumed into ashes Thus by this Dreame did the Deuill delude Dominicus Mother and many more that did beleeue the interpretation of it by the Monks But in generall Dreames are not to be beleeued for they are most wicked and odious in the sight of God that thinke so as may appeare in the 19. of Leuiticus Deutronomie the 23. Ibidem 18. Ecclesiasticus 24. and many other places of the Scripture Thus much for your Diuination by Dreames Sometimes they doe diuine by a Spirit Pythonissa and that is called Pythonissa Sometimes they answer to that they are called for by diuers Figures Men or Women set in polisht Stone Iron Brasse Steele Glasse or the Nayles of ones hand and this is called by the generall Name of Geomancie Geomancie And most commonly to such as these they chuse out Women and Children And I my selfe haue knowne many old Women old Dogge at this kind of Diuination who hold that if the Nayles of the Hand grow yellow it is a great signe of ill lucke and that specks are the true signes of future ill lucke If these apparitions appeare in the Water then it is called Hydromancie Hydromancie These I haue heard are very incident to Catch-poies Bum-baylies and the like when they are duckt vnder Water at a high Tyde at one of the Temples If these apparitions are in the Ayre Aeromancie then it is called Aeromancie If in