wise man as euer was any before him or after him God hath endued him with heauenly gifts and had set him vp as a figure of his Sonne Christ yet when he had married with Pharaohs daughter and others of an other religion and strangers from the commonwealth of Israell he then fell from worse to worse till at the last he fell to miserable idolatrie 1. King 11. 4. What was the cause that Ahab king of Israell did worse then all the kings before him a man euen sold to worke wickednesse in the sight of the Lord aboue all his idolatries and walking in the most wretched wayes of Ieroboam the Scripture layeth this to his charge euen as his greatest 〈◊〉 that he tooke the daughter of the king of the Sydonians to his wife 1. King 16. 29. 30. 31. 23. 33. And lest such parents as either haue or hereafter shall marrie their children to Papists should thinke their case to be better then his because though they marry them to Papists or to Atheists yet they do not marry them to any Pagans let them consider what the Scripture teacheth them more Iehoram King of Iudah married neither with anie Sydonian nor AEgyptian neither with Pagan nor Infidell but with one of his owne people and of the Tribe of Israell yet because she had corrupted her religion in her fathers house the Scripture sheweth this to to be the cause of all Iehorams sinne He did euill in the sight of the Lord because the daughter of Ahab was his wife 2. Kings 1. 18. Yea the Scripture maketh this sinne so great that Iehosaphat a good King was yet defiled with it and it is reported as a great blemish of his vertuous doings that euer he suffered his sonne Iehoram so dangerously to marrie 2. Chron. 1. 18. When God would blame the idolatrie of his people of Israel shewing both how greatly he did hate it and what plagues he would bring vpon them for it he reuealed it vnto the Prophet 〈◊〉 this parable bidding him take vnto himselfe a wife of fornications that is a wife full of spirituall whoredomes such a one as a papist is that in such a marriage as in a glasse he might behold how lothsome the peoples idolatries were Hos. 1. 2. c. Parents haue further to remember that they haue not this rule and authoritie ouer their children that they may chuse whether they will let them marrie or no or when they list and whom they list but fathers and mothers must consider that they haue rule ouer their children vnder the Lord so that the Lord is aboue them and therefore parents must deale with their children according to the will and minde of God which will of God is reuealed vnto vs out of his word Now God by his Apostle saith To auoide fornication let euery man haue his owne wife and let euery woman haue her owne husband Whereby all parents may see that God commaundeth them to permit and suffer euery one to marrie that is disposed to marrie Now if they may not forbid any man or woman to marrie much lesse their owne children whom if they suffer not to marrie not hauing the gift of continencie then they breake and resist Gods ordinance For we reade that when Isaack forbad his sonne Iacob to marrie any of the daughters of Canaan he did not restraine him altogether from marriage and therefore he directed him where and with whom he should marrie Likewise the parents of Sampson when he asked a wife of them did not simply forbid him to marrie but they reproued him for because he would marrie an Insidell and a prophane woman Therefore such parents as be godly will haue aduised consideration and regard of the infirmities of their children and whether they can liue continent and chast or no and if they shall make choise and haue a good liking to such as be honest religious and godly hauing craued their parents consent although they be not so rich and wealthie as they would wish them to matc h with yet they ought not to hinder 〈◊〉 and forbid their children to marrie onely for want of goods and substance Parents ought to be carefull that their children do marrie in such an age wherein they should vnderstand whom they choose and very well perceiue what they take in hand and that they do not seeke to match themselues in marriage aboue their degree And it is very expedient that parents admonish their children to make their choise according to their complexion and condition This is a most vnnaturall and cruell part for parents to sell their children for gaine and luker and to marrie them when they list and to whom they list without the good liking of their children and so bring them into bondage And therefore if parents shal force and compell their children to marrie contrarie to their minde and liking then the sorrowfull children may not say they haue married them but for euer they haue marred and vndone them And therefore to the end that marriages may be perpetuall louing and delightfull betwixt the parties there must and ought to be a knitting of hearts before striking of hands The places of Scripture are many and diuerse by which it may plainely appeare that all godly and Christian parents are charged by God himselfe that they should be carefull in time to make meete choise of husbands for their daughters and fit wiues for their sonnes amongst many these quotations do sufficiently proue it Deut. 7. 3. Nehemia 13. 23. 24. Ierem. 29. 6. 1. Corinth 7. 36. 37. 38. Genesis 24. 10. c and 28. 1. 2. and 4. 4. and 38. 6. 8. Iosua 15. 16. 17. 2. Samuel 13. 23. Iudges 14. 1. c. Let fathers and mothers therefore on whom this charge by God his Commandement lyeth to take wiues for their sonnes and to prouide husbands for their daughters take diligent heed hereunto that they abuse not their power and authoritie ouer their children but as in other cases they are willed by the Apostle that they deale not in such sort to wards them that they thereby be dismayed discouraged so especially in this matter of greatest moment and value of all other worldly things whatsoeuer let them abstaine from all rigour and roughnesse and beware that they turne not their fatherly iurisdiction and gouernment into a tyrannicall sowrenesse and waywardnesse letting their will go for a law and their pleasure for a reason For the rule of parents ouer their children ought to resemble the gouernment of good Princes towards their subiects that is to say it must be milde gentle and easie to be borne For as they so likewise parents so farre as concerneth them and lyeth in their abilitie to performe must carrie such an euen and vpright hand in their gouernment that they may by loue seeke to winne the hearts of those ouer whom they are set to be firme and sure towards them and not to
so rare in the world as it is and men altogether so vnacquainted with it as they be nay so lothsome and tedious to flesh bloud that they are afraid once to begin with it yet let the bare commandement of God preuaile more with vs to take it in hand and to continue in it then all that can be said or thought against it should weigh with vs either to keepe vs from it at the first or afterwards cause vs to giue it ouer And that all men might do it so much the rather let them be assured that the want of this especially is the cause of so many wicked and rebellious children vntrusty and disobedient seruants nay vnfaithfull and vnkind wiues euery where euen for that their husbands their fathers and their maisters do not call vpon them to serue God and see them sanctifie the Sabbath It is a common and iust complaint in all places in the mouth of euery man that seruants and children will not be ruled that they cannot tel where to find a good seruant they know not whom to trust but they see not the greatest cause of it to be in themselues and so go not about to remedie it For whiles they labour not to make their children the sonnes and daughters of God by adoption and to bring their seruants within the houshold of God that they might be his seruants by grace and to make their wiues the chast spouses of Iesus Christ and so all of them to serue him the Lord iustly punisheth them making wiues children seruants and all disobediēt vnto them For how can they do duties vnto men if they haue not learned to do duties vnto God and so of conscience for Gods sake to do duties vnto men Nay must not the Lord needs punish them with disobedience against themselues that by their owne experience they may know how grieuous the neglect of his seruice is vnto himselfe when he iustly measureth out vnto them with the same measure that they haue meat vnto him before And whereas men are readie to imagine and we know it is that which many do obiect against this that to deale so straightly with their houshold were the next way to ridde themselues of all good seruants and that then they might soone be maister and man themselues They must againe on the contrary vnderstand that it is a great wickednesse in them once to thinke that the Lord should require that of them which would necessarily driue them to such inconuenience Nay rather they must be assuredly perswaded That godlinesse hath the promises of this life as well as of the life to come and that if we first seeke the kingdome of God and his righteousnesse in our selues and others all needfull things shall be cast vnto vs. Euen as it is said of Abraham I know that he will commaund his sonnes and his houshold after him that they keepe the way of the Lord to do righteousnesse and iudgement that the Lord may bring vpon Abraham that he hath spoken vnto him So that thus to do is the very high way not to keepe vs. from but to bring vs vnto the fruition of all Gods promises if we giue credit vnto him who as he onely maketh them in the beginning of meere mercy so must he onely accomplish them in the end by his constant veritie and truth We confesse indeed if he be an ill seruant this is the readiest way to be rid of him whose roome is better then his company for he thinketh himselfe to be in a prison nay in hell all the while but in the end he shall perceiue that he is gone from the way of heauen vnto hell if the Lord be not more mercifull vnto him And why should we be loth to depart from the seruice of them that haue no care to serue God or can we looke that they should do any faithfull seruice vnto vs that are so vnfaithfull in the seruice of God But as concerning the rest if any be religious this is the best meane to retaine and keepe them if they be but indifferent this may winne them if they be falling away this may recouer them For what shall we thinke of all the godly fathers in times past that when they vowed diligently to looke to their housholds that they should serue God with them and did constantly performe it that then they had no seruants at all Was so great a man as Iehoshua without seruants when he promised before so many witnesses that he and his house should serue the Lord Was Dauid left alone and constrained to do all himselfe when as being a mightie King he bound himselfe vnto it by that song which he made for the same purpose wherein he saith Mine eyes shall be vnto the faithfull of the land that they may dwell with me he that walketh in a perfect way he shall serue me there shall no deceitfull person dwell in mine house he that telleth lies shall not remaine in my sight Had not Abraham a great household when he was able on a sudden to carrie forth with him of them that were borne and brought vp in his house three hundred and eighteene men in armour to rescue his brother Lot Ofwhom notwithstanding it is said that he would teach his children the way of the Lord as it appeareth he did indeed when by his onely perswasion at the word of God all the males were contented to be circumcised and to receiue that Sacrament vnknowne before and painefull and also ignominious to the flesh if they had looked onely to the outward signe And must not that worthy Captaine of an hundred Italian souldiers needs haue a greater familie then many of these that cauill at this doctrine of whom the spirit of truth reporteth That he feared God and all his houshold What shall we thinke of all these men Shall we ignorantly presume to the further deceiuing of our selues and hardening vs in this sinne that the times were then better and good seruants then more plentifull Or must we needs confesse as the truth is indeed that these men vsed more meanes to make their seruants the seruants of God then men do now a dayes and that so the blessing of God was greater vpon them And is it not set downe in writing for our learning to shew vs what is that which we might looke for at Gods hands if we would walke in the same way that they did seeing there is no respect of persons times or places with him Secondly he must set an order in his house for the seruice of God to wit that morning and euening before meales and after meales prayers and thankes may be offered vnto God and so he acknowledged to be the authour not onely of all spirituall graces that belong to a better life but also of all temporal blessings that belong to this life For seeing that it is Gods good hand ouer vs that doth defend
alwaies be open to speake ill to misconster thy actions and to blaze abroad thy infirmities and scapes He that would haue no enemies must make himselfe none by vniust vnkind or vnneighbourly dealing but he must rather by couttecusnesse of speech helpfulnesse and good neighbourhood win the loue and liking of men yet a man may be too wise in this point Many being Ioth to incurre any mans displeasure will not seeke to vphold right and equitie they will not speake for the poore nor stand out to maintaine Gods cause when he is dishonored by open sin as swearing lying rayling and such like Many to keepe in with all vse all companies alike for auoiding a mans company breedeth a grudge But the good will of men is neuer to be purchased with forsaking of duty Such things as may iustly be ill taken auoyde for peace sake Whereof the Wiseman noteh some as medling in others mens matters He that medleth with a strife that belongeth not to him is as he that taketh a dog by the cares that is casteth himselfe into dangers 2. Be not hasty to go to Law no not in a right cause but agree at home For besides that a man doth seldome scape without great losse in which respect it is also to be auoided as an enemy to thrift thy neighbour is openly put to reproach he becometh thy mortall enemy and will alwayes watch to do thee hurt 3. Sometime to seeke recompence of a wrong breedeth greater malice in the authour of the wrong aud maketh him double it as a man spurreth his horse for kicking when he was spurred Say not I will recompence euill but wait vpon the Lord and he will saue thee 4. Ost haunting of another mans house may bring thee into mislike wherfore the Wiseman saith Withdraw thy foote from thy neighbours house lest he be wearie of thee and hate thee If by carefull auoiding of all iust occasions thou canst not auoide ill will as the world loueth none but her owne neuer seeke to win fauour by departing from duty but commit thy self to God and turne thy mind to make vse of thine enemy Let enmitie which is alwayes prying and seeking occasions to hurt by word or deed make thee to walke not more closely but more vprightly and then mayest thou defie thine enemy For be that walketh vprightly walketh boldly Another enemy to thrift which is also a breaker of peace and good will among men is much borrowing He that is to borrow doth spend much time and le ts slip many occasions of doing his businesse in the due season he must repay in better measure then he borrowed or else ill words or ill will will follow If it be a matter of any value which is borrowed then as Salomon saith The borrower is seruant to the lender that is beholding to him and in his danger The thriftiest men loue least to be beholding to others and therefore seldome seeke and often refuse euen when they be offered to receiue benefits at others mens hands He that goes a borrowing goes a sorrowing and euery deniall he receiues where he thinkes he should speed is the seed of grudge in the minde of the denyer of him who is denied But of all borrowing to borrow vp on vsury is the dearest buying and the rankest poyson to thrift When Dauid would wish a sore plague to his enemy he prayeth that he may be giuen into the vsurers hand Let the vsurer eate him vp If the vsurer be a deuourer woe be to them that come in his hands To auoide borrowing a good husband must cut off all vnnecessary expences that he may haue all necessaries in his house To auoide borrowing of money take heed of suretiship of dealing in bargaines which you are not fully able to compasse of dealing with many things and hauing too many irons in the fire at once Looke how you may compasse matters before you enterprise them Prouide long before against any day of payment and haue not money to seeke vpon the sudden for that driues a man to borrowing yea to vsury or to sell Robbin Hoods peny-worths Besides he must keepe none in his house idle or halfe set to worke none more then needes must Let euery one haue his charge that will throughly occupy him Also looke that they do their taskes euery one in his place and haue an often eye vnto them whether they haue done as they should do The maisters eye maketh a fat horse so also the mistris eye maketh a friendly dairy Except you haue rare seruants such as truly feare God and haue good consciences trust them not further then you see them except necessitie driue you Hitherto of the duties that be belonging to the chiefe ruler os the familie that is the husband touching honest prouision for it Now seeing that God hath ioyned the wife to her husband as an helper she must help him in the prouision for her family so much as lieth in her power and is meete for to do And indeed her industrie and wisedome may do much herein that though her husband should be much wanting in his dutie yet she might hold in the goale Thus many haue done and so Salomon saith the wise woman will do A wise woman buildeth her house But it is not euery womans case because that all are not wise as she that Salomon speaketh of This wise woman is els-where called a gracious woman Prou. 11. 16. And a vertuous woman Prou. 12. 4. because many graces and vertues meete together in her For she is To her husband dutifull faithfull and louing Towards those of her familie wise and prudent In her businesse diligent painfull Towards her neighbour modest humble kinde and quiet First if she be not subiect to her husband to let him rule all the hous-hold especially outward affaires if she will make against him and seeke to haue her owne wayes there will be doing and vndoing Things will go backward the house will come to ruine for God will not blesse where his ordinance is not obeyed This is allowable that she may in modest sort shew her mind and a wise husband will not disdaine to heare her aduice and follow it also if it be good But when her way is not liked of though it be the best way she may not thereupon set all at sixe and seuen with what should I labour and trauaile I see my husband taketh such wayes that he will bring all to nothing This were nothing else but when she seeeth the house falling to helpe to pull it downe faster Salomon saith The wise-woman buildeth her house much more then doth she vnderprop it and hold it vp that by her husbands vndiscreet dealing it be not pulled downe She must not thinke her selfe freed from dutie because he walketh not in his dutie but hold her place and labour for her part to vphold all and so God will either blesse the workes of her hands
A GODLY FORME OF HOVSHOLD GOVERNMENT FOR THE ORDERING OF PRIVATE FAMILIES according to the direction of Gods Word Wherunto is adioyned in a more particular manner the seuerall duties of the Husband towards his wife and the wiues dutie towards her Husband The Parents dutie towards their children and the childrens towards their parents The Maisters dutie towards his seruants and also the seruants duty towards their Maisters First gathered by R. C. and now newly perused amended and augmented by Iohn Dod and Robert Cleuer ISIDORE Thou profitest much when thou readest if thou practisest that which thou readest BERNARD What auaileth it thee to reade often in bookes the holy Name of our Sauiour except thou studie and endeuour to haue godlinesse in thy behauiour LONDON Printed by R. Field for Thomas Man and are to be sold by Arthur Iohnson neare the great North doore of Pauls Church 1621. TO THE RIGHT WORSHIPFVL MAISTER ROBERT Burgaine of Roxall one of his Maiesties Iustices of peace in the County of Warwicke to the right worshipfull Maister Iohn Diue of Ridlington Parke in the Countie of Rutland and to the worshipfull Maister Edmund Temple of Temple hall in the Countse of Leicester Esquires as also to their religious and vertuous wiues R. C. wisheth with heart and minde grace from God the Father by Iesus Christ and constancy in the truth of the Gospell to the end and in the end Auing collected finished this Treatise ensuing and deuising very carefully with my selfe to whom I might Dedicate the same at length I resolued that none were meeter to vndertake the patronage therof then some such meete persons as did alreadie in some good measure practise within their seuerall charges the seuerall points and duties contained therein and so would further prosecute those other necessarie parts which they haue yet in some part pretermitted Wherupon calling to minde the holy exercises daily vsed and exercised in all your houses I was moued for two causes to make you all iointly Patrons thereof First for that I acknowledge my self beholden and indebted vnto you all diuersly since my first acquaintanoe with you and therefore left I should deserue the blame of vnthankfulnesse for benefits receiued I am bold vnder your Names to offer to the whole Church of God these my simple collections Secondly for that as you are all ioyned and linked in kindred by reason of marriage so also you are and haue bin a long time inseparably knit in a zealous and sincere profession of Gods word and Religion And for so much as I may not for many respects accomplish what good I willingly wold yet lest I should be thought to spend the remainder of my yeares in an idle condition or to hide my talent in a napkin I haue bene no lesse carefull then willing to labour other wayes to do what I may to glorifie God and profit his Church Neither will these my labours be vtterly vnprofitable if my purpose therein be rightly conferred with the purpose of my writings For such Housholders as pretend to be great Protestants and sound professors of the Gospell may long enough talke of Discipline and still complaine of the want of Church gouernment but all in vaine and to no purpose vnlesse they will begin this most necessary discipline in reforming their owne houses according to the direction in this Treatise and so suffer the holy religion of God to take place among their familie at home otherwise they shall trauell much and profite little For although there be neuer so good lawes in Cities neuer so pure order in Churches yet if maisters of families do not practise at home catechising in their houses and ioyne their helping hands to Magistrates and Ministers they may in truth but vniustly as many haue done complaine that their children and seruants are disordered and corrupted abroad when in truth they were disordered and are still corrupted and marred at home And therefore it cannot be neither is it to be hoped for that either the father of his children or the husband of his wife or the maister of his seruants should looke for that obedience that reuerence that faithfulnesse and that dutifulnes which they of right ought to haue and the other in conscience and of bounden duties are bound to performe vnlesse they do now at length endeuour to see these orders and duties hereafter mentioned to be practised within their seuerall housholds For if Parents and Housholders shall performe no further dutie to their children and seruants then to prouide for them meate drinke and apparell and to pay them their wages then Papists Atheists yea Turkes and infidels do yeeld this dutie as well as they And seeing all men be carefull that their horses and bullockes should haue sufficient fodder and prouender to the end they may haue their labour in lieu and recompence thereof it doth consequently follow that therefore a Christian housholder ought to haue ouer his children and seruants as much more Christian care then he hath ouer dumbe and insensible beasts that so he may receiue a singular comfort from the daily contēplation of their increase in spirituall graces Oh what a sweet and comfortable thing shall this be to the soule and conscience of such an Householder when he hath bene so diligent and carefull in the training and bringing vp of his children and seruants in the obedience and wayes of the Lord that he may rightly deserue to haue this worthy report and commendation giuen vnto him from the mouth and penne of the godly Namely that he hath a Church in his house that is a company of sound and faithfull Christians such as feare God indeed as the like report was giuen by the Apostle to those godly house-keepers Aquila and Priscilla his wife Rom. 16. 5. 1. Cor. 16. 19 as also to Philemon Phil. 2. Therefore all Parents and householders are in the Lord to be exhorted that they would be carefull to bring vp their children and familie so as they either by some good tokens may see them the children of God and heires of his Couenant or at the least they may be comforted in their owne consciences notwithstanding that their children and seruants for some cause vnknowne to them do refuse their counsell and instruction seeing they to the vttermost of their power and abilitie haue vsed all good meanes to bring them vp well and haue rightly offered them to the Lord. Now if parents and maisters haue iust cause to bewaile and lament when thus trauelling in good education information they cannot yet see good effects and godly fruites in their children and seruants how much more cause of griefe may they haue when they haue vsed bestowed no labor at all either by themselues or others for them to bring them vp in the nurture and feare of the Lord And yet alas many will be grieued for the one that will not be any thing moued for the other Wherefore let all parents and maisters of families know
pounds As a calling must be followed with diligence so also there is wisedome skil and discretion to be vsed in it For as in lifting of a great weight a mightie strong man wanting cunning cannot mooue that though he straine busie himselfe much which a weak man will do with a sleight So dealing in any calling some man shall toile exceedingly much and yet for want of wit and discretion not do halfe the good that another shall with more ease Prou. 13. 23. He that hath a trade let him learne to be cunning in it and able to go through with it Prouer. 16. 20. And to the end he may walke on surer ground let him not disdaine to aske aduice and counsell For the praise of contriuing matters well by his owne wit is not so great as is the losse and ignominy when for want of counsell a man entreth a wrong course Besides Salomon doth commend this wisedome vnto vs often to take heed of hastinesse headinesse and selfe-will and to beware of ouer-weening in our owne reach Prouerbs 15. 22. Without counsell thoughts that is intents and purposes come to nought but in the multitude of counsell there is stedfastnesse And 22. 18. Establish thy thoughts by counsell and by counsell make warre Whereas on the other side Hast bringeth waste Whosoeuer is hastie that is rashly goeth about his businesse without counsell commeth surely to pouertie Prou. 21. 5. That is notable Prouerb 29. 20. Seest thou a man hastie in his matters there is more hope of a foole then of him The same is said of the conceited man Seest thou a man wise in his owne conceit there is more hope of a foole then of him Prou 26. 12. When the Spirit of God doth so carefully commend this thing to vs we must needs thereby see that it is a matter óf great necessitie and of excellent vse For as the prouerbe is Two eyes see more then one And many times men see more cleerely in other mens matters then in their owne In this case also it is good to looke to the examples of others and our owne experience in such like cases for much light commeth into a wise mans mind by this window And to the end that thou mayst make thy vse of experience and examples when occasion shall serue it is good to marke things which shall fall out to obserue the beginnings proceedings and euents of matters and to keepe them in mind to stand thee in stead For he that neuer marketh any thing it is all one as if he had neuer seene or heard any thing and such a one must alwayes be running for counsell in euery light matter or else may take a wrong course except he can stumble on the right way by good hap This obseruation and pondering of euents with the causes that went before is the ripener of wit But idle-mindednesse and carelesse letting passe of matters maketh an emptinesse in the head of such good things as make one man excell another Thirdly in following thy calling let not iustice vpright dealing be forgotten but order thy dealing by them If there were no other yet this reason should weigh with thee that so thou mightest looke to reape good dealing at other mens hands as it is said Prou. 21. 21. He that followeth after righteousnesse and mercie shall find life righteousnesse and glory Whereas such as measure out hard measure to others haue the like measured to them againe according to the saying of our Sauiour Christ. Besides the riches gotten by ill meanes haue a heauie destinie vttered against them The gathering of riches by a deceitfull tongue is vanitie tossed too and fro of them that seeke death Prou. 21. 6. * As iustice and equal dealing towards all men must be looked vnto so God will haue vs not to omit mercifulnesse and friendly dealing to the poore Be not then so tied to thy businesse that thou canst neuer looke out to the necessities of others nor spare time to serue their occasions Among many waies of helping the poore which are commanded this is one to go or ride for them to saue them from wrong or to further them in their right to be their mouth to pleade for them when by feare and simplicitie they cannot pleade for themselues And toward them especially a sparing hand is forbidden that with a sore item Prou. 21. 13. He that stoppeth his eare at the crying of the poore he shall also crie and not be heard And to shew liberalitie especially to the Saints and faithfull there is perswasion with a sweete promise Prou. 15. 17. He that hath mercie vpon the poore lendeth vnto the Lord and the Lord will recompence him that which he hath giuen If any feare that if he tie himselfe so short as neuer to passe the bounds of equitie besides open his hand so wide to the poore he shall neuer liue and thriue of his calling let him remember what is written Prouerb 16. 3. Commit thy workes to the Lord and thy thoughts shall be directed And let that promise encourage him to follow the Lord whithersoeuer he calleth notwithstanding any feare or misdoubt Besides let him haue that in mind which is in Prou. 28. 22. against couetousnesse and posting to be rich A man with a wicked eye hasteth to be rich and knoweth not that pouertie shall come vnto him And againe in the 20. verse He that maketh hast to be rich shal not be innocent Whereto agreeeth that of Saint Paul 1. Tim. 6. 9. 10. He that will be rich falleth into tentation and snares c. And the vanitte of riches ill gotten or ill kept is declared Prou. 13. 1. and 20. 23. Hereunto men must ioyne contentation with that allowance which God as a wise Father that knoweth what is best maketh vnto them For a restlesse and vncontented mind breedeth hast-making to riches drieth vp the riuers of liberalitie and setteth the conscience vpon the racke and stretcheth it beyond the bounds of equitie and iust dealing when hope of gaine is offered Wherefore Salomon to preuent those euils in men and to make them to like of their present estate telleth them that better is a little with righteousnesse then great reuenues without equitie And the like is in Psal. 37. 16. There is a double reason for this First because store gotten with wrong breedeth a sore trouble sometime of mind and conscience and sometimes outward whiles the right owner of the goods suffereth thee not to go so quietly away with them or God stirreth thee vp an enemy mightier then thy selfe that shall pull from thee as thou didst from another The second is because such haue the hatred of manie for that which they purloyne or get by wrong and oppression which a good man would not haue for so small commoditie Hitherto we haue shewed what thou must sticke vnto in following thy calling Now concerning other things not vnworthie to be mentioned as of him that
would prouide for his family well Though we would not haue a man faine himselfe poore and a niggard when he hath abundance as a number do by whining and complaining without cause who are neither good to the Common-wealth nor kinde to themselues yet it is not wisedome to carry an higher port and countenance in the world then a mans ability will warrant Such shall be enuied so long as they do beare it out by the hard-edge they shall be layd at for charges and if through necessity in the end they be faine to yeeld they shall be scorned of their enuiers and little pitied of all others Wherefore it is wisedome rather to beare a low sayle and to keepe within compasse and rather to come short of that thou mightest do remembring that which is Prou. 12. 9. He that is despised and is his owne man is better then he that boasteth himselfe and lacketh bread Againe as they which loue to pearke alost and desire to be carried with a full sayle by the winde of Ambition and Vaine-glory rather then to haue sea-roome do oftentimes rush vpon the rocks of want and there sticke till they sinke so they which in feare of such rockes chuse to ride with halfe or quarter sayle where they haue not roome at will are more safe from danger and may more conueniently prouide against a tempest Yea they may so faile that when God shall remoue them hence they shall not be constrained to leaue their children to the wide world which thing nature bindeth a man to haue a care of Another rule may be drawne out of that which is Prou. 10. 5. A wise sonne gathereth in sommer but he that sleepeth in haruest is the sonne of confusion Where he teacheth that when a man spieth an opportunitie of honest gaine and commoditie he is to follow that while the time serueth but he that for a small matter letteth slip occasions and reckoneth of this time and that time this day and that day thinking then to haue more fit opportunity that will bring all to nothing A good neighbour saith one is a good thing Agreeable to this Salomon saith Prou. 1. 17. A friend loueth at all times And 18. 24. A friend is nearer then a brother As if he should say there is many a friend that is more kinde then a brother more readie to do pleasure then he that is more bound by nature and dutie He saith also Prou. 27. 7. As oyntment and perfume reioyce the heart so doth the sweetnesse of a mans friend by hearty counsell That is also notable which is vers 17. Iron sharpneth iron so doth a man the face of his friend to wit because mutuall communication of friends one with another quickeneth the spirit and cheereth the heart All these places containe motiues to giue heed to this exhortation verse 19. Thine owne friend and thy fathers friend for sake not neither enter into they brothers house in the day of thy calamity for better is a neighbour that is neare then a brother that is farre off In the end of the eighteenth Chapter verse 24. he sheweth how a man shall preserue this treasure which is so good A man that hath friends must shew himselfe friendly Hereto agreeth that of the heathen He that would haue a good neighbour must be a good neighbour In the 24. verse 27 he seemeth to giue a rule for the right order of managing a mans houshold affaires saying Prepare thy worke without and make readie thy things in the field and afterward thou mayest build thine house As though he should say first looke after things that are needfull and necessarie for house-keeping as that thou mayest haue prouision c and then when that is prouided for thou mayest fall a trimming vp of thy house But many fooles beginne first to decke their houses before they lay for necessaries and are faine afterwards to sell their ornaments with losse to prouide more necessarie matters It is a good point of wisedome to beare the want of that longest which may best be spared The last rule is that a good gouernour of a familie for the better maintenance of his familie must be frugal or to speake english a good husband that is spating and sauing and that he so order and moderate himselfe that if his goods and reuenues be not sufficient for him and his charge he make himselfe sufficient for his goods and dispose of himselfe according to the old prouerbe To cut his coate according to his cloth and to eate within nis owne tether Yet we would not haue him pinching or niggardly and so dried vp for liberality that nothing should be wrong from him for good vses That is too farre on the left hand as prodigalitie is on the right But where there is no iust cause to spend or lay out and it might be as well spared there we would haue him saue For his riches be the Lords goods which God hath made him a steward of When the Lord therfore willeth him to open his hand there let him not be straight handed but where nothing but vnruly lusts and pompe or vaine glory bid him draw there is he to hold fast for he is an ill steward that will lay out his maisters goods where there is no need or where lesse would serue There be many who of a greedy and couetous mind will easily imbrace this precept of sparing but as they do it with a wrong purpose so they faile in the matters wherein they should saue and be sparing Many misers pinch their seruants in their meate and drinke allowing them not enough or not good enough and this they take for frugalitie and thrift whereas to pranke and pricke vp themselues in brauery and that sometimes aboue their calling they are very lauish This is no more to be counted frugalitie or good husbandry then to roba poore man to giue to the rich is true liberalitie When therefore thou thinkest of sparing let not the greedy desire of gathering draw thee to it but conscience of well vsing that which God hath lent thee And this mind will draw thee to spare and saue onely there where it may be well done and not there where in conscience thou oughtest to spend Now the better to further out selues in this honest thriftinesse or frugalitie which is called of one a great reuenue the occasions of needlesse expences must be auoided Loue not mirth and pastime for they haue oft occasion of expences Againe they cause losse of time and neglect of businesse at home yea and often men do buy their pleasure with losse in their goods while retchlesse maisters haue either theeuish or carelesse seruants Therfore Salomon telleth such their fortune Prou. 21. 17. He that loueth mirth or pastime will be a poore man Secondly a sweete tooth and a faire mouth that is daintinesse or choicenesse in diet is an enemy to frugalitie a needlesse charge to delight in the taste for
yet if the parents afterwards shall certainely know this and that there was no will nor vnfained meaning at all in the party neither yet is but rather a loathing and abhorring of his Spouse betrothed though he be not able to render iust and sufficient cause thereof they may vpon this occasion either deferre the day of marriage the louger to see if God will happily change the mind of the partie or vtterly breake and frustrate the promise if all good meanes and occasions hauing bene vsed none will preuaile but that the party rather groweth worse and worse For a Contract being a willing and a voluntary consent there is no cause why the parents and such as haue authority and power in sueh cases when they shall vndoubttedly know that the promise was altogether vnwilling and therefore made in meere hypocrisie and dissimulation neither can be by tract of time or any other good meanes vsed be bettered but rather waxeth worse and worse may not breake and frustrate the same For why did Rebeccaes parents deny her to Isaack neither would send her with Abrahams seruant to be married before such time as they had asked her consent yea when as they said We will call the maide and aske her consent do they not plainly shew that both the law of Nature and the Law of God taught them that this consent was of great moment absolute necessity And when the Apostle doth command men and women to marrie in the Lord how can the marriage be in the Lord when one party doth not onely not loue but hate the other And how can such two become one flesh lawfully when as there wants the vnion and coniunction of the heart the true naturall mother of all marriage duties Wherefore this promise must be in this respect at least willing and voluntary For albeit it is not necessary neither yet possible that there should be such great measure of true holy and sanctified loue at that time as afterward for that groweth by little and little according to the blessing of God and the faithfull performance of other duties afterward euen to their liues end yet if it be voluntarie and vnfained it is enough and sufficient to make a true contract in the Lord. So as no man ought to separate those whom God hath thus ioyned Secondly we call it voluntary in respect of constraint and compulsion contrary to a free cōsent For if either party be vrged constrained or compelled by great feare of their parents or others by threatning of losse of preferment of health of limbe of life or of any such other like or by any other violent manner of dealing whatsoeuer to yeeld their promise cleane contrary to the motion or good liking of their hearts this kind of promise as it doth not binde the partie to keepe it so it ought to be frustrated broken by the parents themselues or by such maisters as may and ought to command and rule them in such cases If this were not so how could the parties keepe the commandements of God giuing them direction whom to marrie First that they should marrie onely in the Lord. Againe that they should not be vnequally yoked with infidels neither of which they can keepe if their parents might compell them to Contract and marrie It becometh the parents to perswade their children by all good meanes to yeeld their consent rather then to draw them by wicked sleights and cunning drunkennesse or any other wicked and violent meanes For as that is not to marrie in the Lord so all such forced Contracts may be broken and frustrated by the Magistrate who is Gods Lieutenant to redresse such intollerable enormities among the societies of men For if parents may deny marriage to such as haue onely by force and violence obtained the word and body of their child much more may the magistrate deny marriage where onely a verball promise nath bene gotten by violent compulsion and for these causes and in this sense and meaning alone we conclude that Contracts must be voluntary Fourthly it must be a mutuall promise that is either party must make it to other not the man onely nor the woman onely but both the man and the woman though decency and order require the man to do it first and then the woman because he is her head and she his glory and ought to leade and guide her in all things wherein the Lord hath put a pre heminence For if this promise be not mutually made of them both but of one alone it is no true and perfect Contract and therefore may be broken by parents and such as haue authority herein because the party vnpromising is not bound by word or deed but is free in so much that such a Contract is rather so termed then that it is any true Contract indeed But if it be mutuall then it doth mutually and muiolably bind both so that in this regard neither parent magistrate nor any other can or ought to breake it for this being fully performed and accomplished is one principall cause of making two one flesh in such sort as it is written Therefore a man shall leaue his father and mother and shall be ioyned to his wife and they two shall be one flesh c. Genes 2. 24. Also that the man hath not power ouer his owne body nor the woman ouer hers and so to be short hence ariseth all mutuall beneuolence betweene them And therefore a point of great weight and necessitie in no wise to be omitted in a Contract Fiftly we say it must be betweene one man and one woman where first it is to be noted that it may not nor ought not to be betweene any other creatures but man-kind nay neither among brute beasts nor Angels For God hath not ordained or instituted marriage for them neither can it be betweene man and man or woman and woman If any such Contract be either voluntary or by fraud and deceipt by ignorance or errour it is no Contract at all but a meere wicked profanation of Gods ordinance who gaue onely woman to man not woman to woman nor man to man Likewise it cannot be betweene Angels good or bad and woman because God hath set no such ordinance in the nature of these creatures If therefore there hath bene any such matter or shall be attempted by Sathan with any woman as some stories report it is nothing 〈◊〉 but a meere illusion and diuellish practise to deceiue and draw superstitious into the kingdome of darknesse and to intrap them in the chaines of condemnation against which and all other diabolicall illusions we ought to watch and pray continually Secondly it is to be obserued that betweene one man and one woman and not two men and one woman or two women not betweene two women and one man or moe By which is condemned as meere nullities and prophanations all Contracts whatsoeuer made betweene moe then two For it is written And they twaine shall be
mother Mine owne deare husband and well beloued brother And if it be true that men do say that friendship maketh one heart of two much more truely and effectually ought wedlocke to do the same which farre passeth all manner both of friendship and kindred Therefore it is not said marriage doth make one man or one minde or one body of two but clearely one person wherefore matrimonie requireth a greater dutie of the husband to wards his wife and the wife towards her husband then otherwise they are bound to shew to their parents The Apostle biddeth To reioyce with them that reioyce and weepe with them that weepe With whom should the wife reioyce rather then with her louing husband Or with whom should she weepe and mourne rather then with her owne flesh I will not leaue thee saith Elisha to Eliah so she should say I will neuer leaue him till death Beare one anothers burthen saith Paul Who shall beare one anothers burthen if the wife do not beare the husbands burden Wicked lezabel comforted her husband in his sicknesse and Ieroboams wife sought for his health though she was as bad as he God did not bid Sarah leaue her father and countrie as he did bid her husband yet because he bad Abraham leaue his she left hers too shewing that she was content not onely to be his play fellow but his yoke-fellow too Beside a yoke-fellow she is called an helper to helpe him in his labours to helpe him in his troubles to helpe him in his sicknesse like a woman physition sometime with her strength and sometime with her counsell For as sometime God confoundeth the wise by the foolish and the strong by the weake so sometimes he teacheth the wise by the foolish and helpeth the strong by the weake Therefore Peter saith Husbands are wonne by the conuersation of their wiues As if he should say sometime the weaker vessell is the stronger vessell Abraham may take counsell of Sarah as Naaman was aduised by his seruant The Shunamites counsell made her husband receiue a Prophet into his house and Hesters counsell made her husband spare the Church of the Iewes so some haue bene better helpe to their husbands then their husbands haue bin to them for it pleaseth God to prouoke the wise with the foolish as he did the Iewes with the Gentiles Beside an helper she is called a comforter too and therefore the man is bid to reioyce in his wife which is as much to say that wiues must be the reioycing of their husbands euen like Dauids harpe to comfort Saul A good wife therefore is knowne when her words and deeds and countenance are such as her husband loueth She must not examine whether he be wise or simple but that she is his wife and therefore being bound she must obey as Abigail loued her husband though he were a foole churlish and euill conditioned For the wife is as much despised for taking rule ouet her husband as he for yeelding it vnto her Therefore one saith that a mankind woman is a monster that is halfe a woman halfe a man It beseemeth not the mistresse to be maister no more then it becommeth the maister to be mistresse but both must saile with their own wind and both keepe their standing Lastly we call the wife huswife that is houswife not a street-wife one that gaddeth vp and downe like Thamar nor a field-wife like Dinah but a house-wife to shew that a good wife keepes her house and therefore Paul biddeth Titus to exhort women that they be chast and keeping at home presently after chast he saith keeping at home as though home were chastities keeper And therefore Salomon depainting and describing the qualities of a whore setteth her at the doore now sitting vpon her stall now walking in the streets now looking out of the window like cursed Iezabel as if she held forth the glasse of temptation for vanity to gaze vpon But chastitie careth to please but one and therefore she keepes her closet as if she were still at prayer The Angell asked Abraham Where is thy wife Abraham answered She is in the tent The Angell knew where she was but he asked that we might see how women in old time did keepe their tents and houses It is recorded of the Shunamite that she did aske her husband leaue to go vnto the Prophet though she went to a Prophet and went of a good errand and for his cause as much as her owne yet she thought it not meete to go farre abroad without her husbands leaue The second point is that wiues submit themselues and be obedient vnto their owne husbands as to the Lord because the husband is by Gods ordinance the wiues head that is her defender teacher and comforter and therefore she oweth her subiection to him like as the Church doth to Christ and because the example of Sarah the mother of the faithfull which obeyed Abraham and called him Lord moueth them thereunto This point is pattly handled before in the first point as also in the duty of the husband to the wife As the Church should depend vpon the wisedome discretion and will of Christ and not follow what it selfe listeth so must the wife also submit and apply her selfe to the discretion and will of her husband euen as the gouernmēt and conduct of euery thing resteth in the head not in the bodie Moses writeth that the Serpent was wise aboue all beasts of the field and that he did declare in assaulting the woman that when he had seduced her she might also seduce and deceiue her husband Saint Paul noting this among other the causes of the womans subiection doth sufficiently shew that for the auoiding of the like inconueniences it is Gods will that she should be subiect to her husband so that she shall haue no other discretion or will but what may depend vpon her head The Lord also by Moses saith the same Thy desire shall be subiect to thy husband and he shall rule ouer thee This dominion ouer their wiues will doth manifestly appeare in this that God in old time ordained that if the woman had vowed any thing vnto God it should not withstanding rest in her husband to disauow it so much is the wiues will subiect to her husband Yet it is not meant that the wife should not employ her knowledge and discretion which God hath giuen her in the helpe and for the good of her husband but alwayes it must be with condition to submit herselfe vnto him acknowledging him to be her head that finally they may so agree in one as the coniunction of marriage doth require Yet as when in a Lute or other musicall instrument two strings concurring in one tune the sound neuerthelesse is imputed to the strongest and highest so in a well ordered houshold there must be a communication and consent
of counsell and will betweene the husband and the wife yet such as the counsell and commandement may rest in the husband True it is that some women are wiser and more discreet then their husbands as Abigail the wife of Nabal and others Whereupon Salomon saith A wise woman buildeth vp the house and blessed is the man that hath a discreete wife Yet still a great part of the discretion of such women shall rest in acknowledging their husbands to be their heads and so vsing the graces that they haue receiued of the Lord that their husbands may be honored not contemned either of them or of others which falleth out contratie when the wife will seeme wiser then the husband So that this modestie and gouernment ought to be in a wife namely that she should seldome speake but to her husband or by her husband And as the voice of him that soundeth a trumpet is not so lowd as the sound that it yeeldeth so is the wisedome and word of a woman of greater vertue and efficacie when all that she knoweth and can do is as if it were said and done by her husband The obedience that the wife oweth to her husband dependeth vpon this subiection of her will and wisedome vnto him as 1. Peter 3. 6. Ephesians 5. 33. Ester 1. 12. So that women may not prouoke their husbands by disobedience in matters that may be performed without offence to God neither presume ouer them either in kindred or wealth or obstinately to refuse in a matter that may trouble household peace and quiet For disobedience begetteth contempt of the husband and contempt wrath and is many times the cause of troubles betweene the man and the wife If the obedience importeth any difficultie she may for her excuse gently propound the same yet vpon condition to obey in case the husband should persist in his intent so long as the discommoditie importeth no wickednesse For it is better to continue peace by obedience then to breake it by resistance And indeed it is naturall in the members to obey the conduct and gouernment of the head Yet must not this obedience so farre extend as that the husband should command any thing contrary to her honour credit and saluation but as it is comely in the Lord Colos. 3. 16. Ephes. 5. 13. Therefore as it were a monstrous matter and the meanes to ouerthrow the person that the body should in refusing all subiection and obedience to the head take vpon it to guide it selfe and to command the head so were it for the wife to rebell against the husband Let her then beware of disordering and 〈◊〉 the course which God in his wisedome hath established and withall let her vnderstand that going about it she riseth not so much against her husband as against God and that it is her good and honor to obey God in her subiection and obedience to her husband If in the practise of this dutie she find any difficultie or trouble through the inconsiderate course of her husband or otherwise let her remember that the same proceedeth not of the order established by the Lord but through some sin afterward crept in which hath mixed gall among the honie of the subiection and obedience that the woman should haue enioyed in that estate wherein together with Adam she was created after the Image of God And so let her humble her selfe in the sight of God and be well assured that her subiection and obedience is acceptable vnto him and that the more that the image of God is restored in her and her husband through the generation of the holy Ghost the lesse difficultie she shall find in that subiection and obedience as many in their marriage haue in deed tried to their great contentment and consolation Further there is a certaine discretion and desire required of women to please the nature inclinations and manners of their husbands so long as the same import no wickednesse For as the looking-glasse howsoeuer faire and beautifully adorned is nothing worth if it shew that countenance sad which is pleasant or the same pleasant that is sad So the woman deserueth no commendation that as it were contrarying her husband when he is merry sheweth herselfe sad or in sadnesse vttereth her mirth For as men should obey the lawes of their Cities so women the manners of their husbands To some women a becke of her husband is sufficient to declare that there is somewhat amisse that displeaseth him and specially if she beare her husband any reuerence For an honest Matron hath no neede of any greater staffe but of one word or one sowre countenance Moreouer a modest and chaste woman that loueth her husband must also loue her house as remembring that the husband that loueth his wife cannot so well like of the sight of any tapestry as to see his wife in his house For the woman that gaddeth from house to house to prate confoundeth her selfe her husband and family Titus 2. 5. But there are foure reasons why the woman is to go abroad First to come to holy meetings according to the duty of godlinesse The second to visit such as stand in need as the duty of loue and charitie doth require The third for employment and prouision in houshold affaires committed to her charge And lastly with her husband when he shall require her Gen. 20. 1. c. The euill and vnquiet life that some women haue and passe with their husbands is not so much for that they commit with and in their persons as it is for that they speake with their tongues If the wife would keepe silence when her husband beginneth to chide he should not haue so vnquiet dinners neither she the worse supper Which surely is not so for at the same time that the husband beginneth to vtter his griefe the wife beginneth to scold and chafe whereof doth follow that now and then most vnnaturally they come to handy-gripes more beast-like then Christian-like which their so doing is both a great shame and foule discredit to them both The best meanes therefore that a wife can vse to obtaine and maintaine the loue and good liking of her husband is to be silent obedient peaceable patient studious to appease his choler if he be angry painefull and diligent in looking to her businesse to be solitary and honest The chiefe and speciall cause why most women do faile in not performing this duty to their husbands is because they be ignorant of the word of God which teacheth the same and all other duties and therefore their soules and consciences not being brought into subiection to God and his word they can neuer vntill then yeeld and performe true subiection and obedience to their husbands and behaue themselues so euery way as Christian wiues are in duty bound to do But if wiues be not so dutifull seruiceable and subiect to their husbands as in conscience they ought the onely cause thereof for the most part
We see by experience that euery beast and euery fowle is nourished and bred of the same that did beare it onely some women loue to be mothers but not nurses As therefore euery tree doth cherish and nourish that which it bringeth forth euen so also it becometh naturall mothers to nourish their children with their owne milke Secondly the examples of the Scriptures are many that proue this As Sarah who nursed Isaack though she were a Princesse and therefore able enough to haue had others to haue taken that paines Though she was a beautifull woman and of great yeares yet she her selfe nursed and gaue sucke to her sonne Also Anna vnto whom the holy Ghost hath left it recorded as a commendation that she nursed her owne sonne Samuel So when God chose a nurse for Moses he led the hand-maide of Pharaos daughter to his mother as though God would haue none to nurse him but his mother Like wise when the Sonne of God was borne his Father thought none fit to be his nurse but the blessed virgin his mother It is a commendation of a good woman and set downe in the first place as a principall good worke in a widow that is well reported of if she haue nursed her children And therfore such as refuse thus to do may well and fitly be called nice and vnnaturall mothers yea in so doing they make themselues but halfe mothers and so breake the holy bond of nature in locking vp their breasts from their children and deliuering them forth like the Cuckoo to be hatched in the sparrowes nest Thirdly the childrens bodies be commonly so affected as the milke is which they receiue Now if the nurse be of an euill complexion as she is affected in her body or in her mind or hath some hidden disease the child sucking of her breast must needs take part with her And if that be true which the learned do say that the temperature of the mind followes the constitution of the body needs must it be that if the nurse be of a naughty nature the child must take thereafter Yet if it be so that the nurse be of a good complexion and of an honest behauiour whereas contrariwise maidens that haue made a scape are commonly called to be Nurses yet can it not be but that the mothers milke should be much more naturall for the child then the milke of a stranger As by experience let a man be long accustomed to one kind of drinke if the same man change his ayre and his drinke he is like to mislike it as the egges of a henne are altered vnder a hawke Neuerthelesse such women as be oppressed with infirmities diseases want of milke or other iust and lawfull causes are to be dispensed withall But whose breasts haue this perpetuall drought Forsooth it is like the gowt no beggers may haue it but Citizens or Gentlewomen In the ninth of Hosea verse 14. drie breasts are named for a curse What a lamentable hap haue Gentle-women to light vpon this curse more then others Sure if their breasts be drie as they say they are they should fast and pray together that this curse might be remoued from them And lastly that it is hurtfull to the mothers themselues both Physitians can tell and some women full oft haue felt when they haue bene troubled with sore breasts besides other diseases that happen to them through plentie of milke The wise is further to remember that God hath giuen her two breasts not that she should employ and vse them for a shew or of ostentation but in the seruice of God and to be a helpe to her husband in suckling the child common to them both Experience teacheth that God conuerteth the mothers bloud into the milke wherewith the child is nursed in her wombe He bringeth it into the breasts furnished with nipples conuenient to minister the warme milke vnto the child whom he endueth with industrie to draw out the milke for his owne sustenance The woman therefore that can suckle her child and doth it not but resuseth this office and duty of a mother declareth her selfe to be very vnthankfull to God and as it were forsaketh and contemneth the fruite of her wombe And therefore the bruite beasts lying vpon the ground and granting not one nipple or two but sixe or seauen to their young ones shall rise in iudgment against these dainty half-mothers who for feare of wrinckling of their faces or to auoyd some small labour do refuse this so necessary a duty of a mother due to her children The properties due to a married wife are that she haue grauitie when she walketh abroad wisedome to gouerne her house patience to suffer her husband loue to breed and bring vp her children courtesie towards her neighbours diligence to lay vp and to saue such goods as are within her charge that she be a friend of honest company and a greater enemie of want on and light toyed So then the principall dutie of the wife is first to be subiect to her husband Ephes. 5. 22. Colloss 3. 18. 1. Pet. 3. 1. 2. To be chast and shamefast modest and silent godly and discreet 3. To keepe her selfe at home for the good gouernment of her family and not to stray abroad without iust cause Here it is not to be pretermitted but we must say somewhat touching men and women that betwise married and so become step-fathers and step-mothers Such husbands and wiues as marrie againe after the death of their first wiues or first husbands are carefully to remember that they do not displease their wiues or their husbands which they now haue by ouermuch rehearsing of their first wife or first husband For the course and condition of the world is such that husbands and wiues do account and reckon things past better then things that be present And the reason is because no commoditie or felicitie is so great but it hath some griefe and displeasure and also some bitternesse mingled with it which so long as it is present grieueth vs sore but when it is once gone it leaueth no great feeling of it selfe behind it and for that cause we seeme to be lesse troubled with sorrowes and discommodities past then with those that are present Also age stealeth and commeth on apace which causeth both men and women to be the lesse able to sustaine and endure troubles and griefes then before Therefore such men and women as be twise married and be wise and religious ought not to esteeme their wife or husband which is dead better then her or him which they enioy now aliue remembering the common prouerbe That we must liue by the quicke and not by the dead and that we must make much of that we now haue Let the name of step-father and step-mother admonish and put them in mind of their duty towards the children of the one and the other For step-father and step-mother doth signifie a sted-father and a
Thirdly that they be vnto their children examples of all godlinesse and vertue Fourthly that they keep them from idlenesse the mother of all mischiefes and bring them vp either in learning or in some good art or occupation whereby they may get their liuing with honestie and truth when they shall come to age and yeares of discretion 1. Touching the first point Parents are to be admonished that they beare in minde that the cause why the Lord hath blessed them with children is First that they should be carefull to see that their children be so vertuously brought vp that they may become Citizens of the Church of God so that whensoeuer they themselues shall die in the Lord they may leaue their children true worshippers of God in their place But alasse there be few that haue any great care of this dutie It is to be remembred that it is the fathers dutie with all conuenient speed to present the child to baptisme and there to giue the name vnto his child as may appeare by the example Luke 1. 3. Gen. 21. 3. And it were a thing to be wished that all parents when and at such time as God blesseth them with children would giue them such names as are named and commended vnto vs in the holy Scriptures to the end that when they come to yeares of discretion they by hearing those names may be excited and moued to follow the vertuous life and Christian conuersation of those men and women whose names they beare which the holy Ghost hath commended them for and contrariwise to 〈◊〉 and auoide those faults and vices which are discommended in them And yet we haue to remember that those children which are named and called by and after any of the names of the 〈◊〉 Prophets Apostles or by the name of any other Saint man or woman are not any thing the better because they haue such godly and Christian names vnlesse that they do imitate and follow them in faith vertue and godly behauiour so on the other side they that be not called by such Christian names as are mentioned in the sacred Scripture are not in respect of their names any thing the worse hauing an assured faith in the merits of Christ his death passion and bloud shedding and leading their liues agreeable to the same For as neither the reuenues nor the glorious titles and names of ancestors 〈◊〉 descend of noble parentage maketh men noble and renowned indeed vnlesse they themselues be godly honest and wise so neither the godly names no nor yet the faith and vertue of the fathers auaileth the wicked and vngodly children any thing at all vnlesse they repent and become faithfull and godly as they were Let vs here consider that so often as in the race of our life we do heare or do speake of our name it doth put vs in remembrance first of Gods mercie shewed vnto vs in our baptisine secondly of our promise to God againe And as in times amongst our ancestors Infants had their names giuen them when they were circumcised as appeateth in Luke no doubt to this end that the circumcised should be admonished by the calling by their names at what time and place they had their names giuen them and would thinke that they are written in the number of the children of God and ioyned in league with him and made partakers of his couenant so likewise after the same manner must we that haue had our names giuen vs in baptisme remember and beare in minde that we are by grace adopted to be the sonnes of God and receiued into his fauour and therefore that we are Gods owne and as it were his goods and riches who beare his name as proper vnto him 2. Secondly they may assure themselues that all their labour is lost which they bestow vpon their children vnlesse they bring them vp in the feare of God and oftentimes call vpon Gods helpe by earnest prayer that he in mercy would vouthsafe to preserue them from the manifold snares subtilties and temptations of Sathan which their tender age is subiect vnto We may heare many parents complaine of the disobedience of their children but they do not marke and consider that they are iustly punished by God for that they thinke by their own industrie and wit to make them good and vertuous without Gods blessing which they seldome or neuer call for in good earnest 3. Thirdly let them consider how noble a thing a child is whom God himself hath shaped and formed in his mothers wombe nourished brought forth into the light and indued with body and soule to the end he should as it were in a table represent God hîs first patterne 4. Fourthly let them know that these things are to be dealt with all in order Vnto the body they owe nourishment bringing vp apparell and sometimes correction that they may keepe children in awe Vnto the soule they owe catechising instruction and doctrine and that of two sorts namely of godlinesse and of ciuilitie By the one they shall keepe a good conscience before God by the other they shall obtaine a good report among men For these are the two principall points which parēts ought to be most carefull to plant in this life in their children both which the Apostle comprehendeth in one verse where he saith Ephes. 1. 4. Ye fathers prouoke not your children to wrath but bring them vp in instruction and information of the Lord. And therefore all parents are diligently to instruct and teach their children the first principles of Christ his Religion so soone as by age they are able to perceiue and vnderstand the same that they may as it were suck in godlinesse together with their mothers milke and straight-wayes after their cradle may be nourished with the tender foode of vertue towards that blessed life To haue godly children no doubt is the greatest treasure that may be For in the children do the parents liue in a manner after their death And if they be well instructed catechised and vertuously brought vp God is honoured by them the Common-wealth is aduanced yea their parents and all other fare the better for them They are their parents comfort next vnto God their ioy staffe and vpholding of their age and therefore parents ought to begin betimes to plant vertue in their childrens breasts for late sowing bringeth a late or neuer apt haruest Young branches will bow as a man will haue them but old trees will sooner breake then bow And therefore as arrowes are an excellent weapon of defence to a strong and a mightie man that can shoot them with courage euen so children godly brought vp are a speciall protection and defence to their parents And as the strong mans quiuer the better it is furnished with chosen shaftes the better defence he hath so likewise the more godly children their parents haue the greater is their ioy and happinesie Yea and further as arrowes are at the commandement
helping hands to Magistrates and Ministers they may indeed but vniustly as many haue done complaine that their children are corrupted abroad when they were before and are still corrupted and spoiled at home Alas if parents to whom the comfort of their children well brought vp is a precious crowne will not informe and reforme their children in the feare of God how can hope sustaine these men that others will performe this duty for them to whom this charge doth farre lesse appertaine Lastly let parents remember that therefore they haue disordered and disobedient children to themselues because they haue bene disobedient children to the Lord and disordered to their parents when they were young whereof because they haue not repented the Lord punisheth their sinnes to others with the like sinne to themselues Wilt thou know thou father how thou maist haue that blessing to be the blessed father of a blessed seed Wilt thou know thou mother how to auoyd that curse to be the cursed mother of a cursed seed Bring thy children within the compasse of the couenant indeuour to make thy sonne the sonne of God and thy daughter by nature the daughter of God by grace and remember that God on his part protested to father Abraham that he was all sufficient for the accomplishment of his promise in giuing him a blessed seede and requested also on father Abrahams part that he should walke before him and be vpright Wilt thou then haue the one part of this couenant that is that God should blesse thee in thy seede then remember also that thou walke before the Lord and be vpright Wilt thou haue thy children as the blessed seede of Abraham teach them with Abraham the iudgements of the Lord pray for them with Abraham that they may liue in the light of the Lord be readie to offer them with Abraham that they may be an holy sacrifice vnto the Lord. It is thou ô man ô woman that maist do thy child the greatest good and the greatest harme if thou prayest for them and repentest for thy selfe the Lord will blesse thy care the Pastors paines and the teachers trauell but if thou despisest these duties the Lord will denie thee these blessings and the curse of God will fall vpon the childe at home in thy house abroad in the Church and in the schoole And seeing the Lord hath promised that he will be thy God and blesse thy seede if thou beest faithfull thou mayest bothe hope that thou art of the faithfull if thou hast a blessed seede and feare that thou hast not as yet the blessing of the couenant when thy seede is accursed But had not Iacob wicked children and Dauid vngodly sonnes and doth not daily experience teach vs that wicked men haue godly children Yes for besides the secret counsell of the Lord herein we must know that neither the promise of the Lord is so vniuersall that euery particular child of a faithfull man should be within the Couenant or if of many there be but one blessed the promise is performed yea which more is though the faithfull man haue neuer a good childe yet if vnto a thousand generations there be but one good the Couenant is not broken Noither must we tye the Lord his worke so much to man that a good man may not haue an cuill sonne seeing though the Lord visit not his sinnes yet he may visit the sinnes of some of his fore-fathers to the third and fourth generation going before To the second we say that an euill father hauing a good child though the Lord shew not mercy to that particular man therein yet he may remember his promise to some of the fore-fathers in the thousand generations going before and though that euill man haue no cursed child yet the curse may be accomplished in the third and fourth generation following Wherefore not speaking of Election or Reprobation which we leaue onely to the Lord to make good or bad we exhort parents to the ordinary meanes to bring vp their children so as they either by some good tokens may see them the children of God as heires of the couenant or at least be comforted in their owne consciences If their children for some cause vnknowne refuse it yet they may reioyce in this that to the vttermost of their ability they haue vsed all good and godly meanes to bring them vp well and offered them to God And if parents haue cause to be grieued when thus trauelling in good education they cannot see good in their children how much more cause of griese may they haue when they haue vsed and bestowed no labour at all to bring them vp in the feare of the Lord And yet many will be grieued for the one that will not for the other Wherefore if we wish to conuey God his blessings to our posterities let vs vse the duties thereunto let vs if we be loth to conuey God his iudgements to our children carefully auoid the meanes vnto it And surely as it is a blessed thing in the houre of death with Symeon to depart in peace leauing our wiues children and seruants members of Christ spouses to Christ children to God and seruants to the Lord So in death no one thing will be more grieuous vnto a man then the Lord hauing giuen him the charge of so many soules to be furthered to saluation that his owne tormented conscience shall presse him How as much as he could he hath helped them forward to their damnation and so which is more fearefull he shall haue them spewing and foming out on his face continuall curses in hell accusing him for euer to be a murtherer of their soules and a cut-throat of their saluation The end of all this briefly is thus much that parents hauing fooles children not walking either in knowledge or in a good conscience must make some vse of so iust a cause of griefe examining themselues and accusing their owne soules before the Lord either for that their meeting was prophane to so holy an estate or brutish because they desired rather a seed like vnto themselues in flesh and bloud then such as might be like Christ by grace and new birth or that they begat their off-spring as meere naturall or very carnall men or because they either prophanely neglected all good education or monstroufly misliked that in their yong children which they liked in themselues and punished in them their owne corrupt precepts or for that they suffered their children iniuriously to do euill to others which they could not suffer to do to themselues or vntaught them that at home which was taught abroad or in that they do lye in some sinne vnrepented of or else because they neuer made conscience to bring their posteritie within the couenant of saluation but still loued the flesh of their children and not their soule Let all parents remember that they are bound by the law of God and nature as concerning this bodily life to make good and honest
merchandise it carrieth about the more need it hath of a cunning ship-maister So the greater the childe is both by birth and by inheritance so much the more neede is it for him to be brought vp in learning and in good literature For learning knowledge and vnderstanding is profitable both for rich and poore so that as the Grecians say he that is ignorant and vnlearned seeth nothing although he haue eyes The life of such a one is as a tree without fruite a day without Sunne a night without Moone or Starres a house without a man and an head without a bodie It is found by experience which is the best Schoole-maister that vnto what occupation or science soeuer any young man shall be put the more skill and knowledge he hath in the liberall Sciences so much the more sooner shall be learne his occupation and the more ready and handsomer shall he be about the same And besides all this he that hath learning although it be but small shall much better vnderstand the Preachers and take more profit by hearing of them to his great and endlesse comfort then he that hath no learning Experience also teacheth vs this that goods riches beauty glory and health be vnstable and fade perish passe away come and go but learning and vertue neuer stagger alway be constant Therefore of all the charges that parents be at about their children that mony is best bestowed that is laid out vpon learning especially when they are taught to know God aright and how he will be serued It is a lamentable thing to consider how carelesse some parents are of their children when they put them to the schoole in that they make small account and reckoning to what schoole-maister they put their children to learne so they may haue them taught for little or no cost though their children profit little or nothing in learning so that oftentimes they not onely bestow their money in vaine but also they suffer their children to loose their time which is a thing so precious as it cannot be redeemed with any money and so let them spend two or three yeares in learning that which they might by the diligence and orderly teaching of a skilfull schoole-maister learne in lesse then halfe this time if there be any aptnesse and towardnesse in the children Therefore let parents remember that as the goodnesse of the ground is not much profitable for corne vnlesse there be a meete husband-man to till and sow the same so likewise it is not enough to find good towardnesse in your children vnlesse you prouide a meete and fit Schoole-maister to further the same And as Noblemen and Gentlemen are desirous to haue a good and skilfull horse-keeper that can keepe their horses well and they spare not to giue stipends to such euen so much more ought Christian parents to be desirous to haue and maintaine a good Schoolemaister that might bring vp their children in vertue wisedome and good learning And like as if their horle be not well broken or haue any 〈◊〉 qualitie they will be carefull to see it remedied and that he may be made tractable and gentle so likewise godly parents ought to be much more carefull not onely that their children may by instruction be brought to some good order but also to looke that there be no fault in the teacher to whom they commit the care to bring them vp in learning and good manners But alas and with griefe be it spoken many men now a daies albe it they perceiue their children to be toward and apt vnto letters and capable to receiue good learning hauing wealth and riches enough to maintaine them thereat yet will they not suffer them to continue thereat vntill they come to any good perfection some because they themselues do not like of our state religion othersome because they see little preferment and no worldly aduantage to follow learning but great trouble and affliction all which men in this doing declare themselues to be irreligious vngodly and destroyers both of themselues their children and of all Common-wealths and congregations For what publicke wealth Towne Citie or Parish can be well gouerned except the Prince Magistrate or Preacher be learned both in humane and diuine lawes In times past when ignorance and superstition was accounted good deuotion at which time men saw so many spirituall promotions as they then called them vnto rich Bishoprickes Abbies Priories Deaneries Benefices c. then they would let for no cost to haue their children learned in some sort to the end they might get them to be Priests and so to say Masse and the rest of that idolatrous seruice that so they might liue in ease and idlenesse But now that they see how painfull and perillous a charge it is to preach and rightly to diuide Gods word and to deliuer the same freely and faithfully and also how vnthankfull an office and calling it is to gouerne well a congregation they had rather their children should be bound prentises to some trade or else follow any other profession then that they should study Diuinitie When children were nothing apt to good learning and when there was no good learning to be had no nor good teachers yet then well was he that might set his child to Schoole But now when youth was neuer so apt to good learning as it is at this day and learning and all good meanes neuer so plenteously flourishing being restored and reduced into such a facilitie and a compendious briefenesse yea neuer so good learned and skilfull schoole-maisters neuer such plentie of so good and plaine books printed neuer so good cheape the holy Ghost mercifully offering his gifts as it were into the mouthes of all men few there be that will open their mouthes to receiue them their eyes to see the cleare light nor yet their eares to heare so pure manifest and wholesome and heauenly doctrine euen the word of God the meanes of our saluation It is therefore to be feared that for this our great vnthankfulnesse these so manifold heauenly blessings shall be taken from vs and giuen to some other nation that will both be more thankfull for them and also shew forth better fruites of Christianitie then we hitherto haue done Oh therefore that parents would aduisedly consider that the want of this Christian dutie of the good education of their children is the onely cause of great mischiefe and much miserie both vpon children and themselues yea in truth it is from hence that so much sorrow griefe and shame befalleth many times vpon the fathers and mothers And how cometh this to passe that the parents owne dung is cast in their faces by their owne children in mocking and despising of them and whence arise all these inconueniences before named together with all these grieuous plagues and iudgements of God vpon their children to the consuming of their eyes but from this their owne negligence in bringing vp their children For it is
21. 2. Tim. 3. 2. 3. 4. 5. 2 The riches of the body Beautie Chuse a wife for vertue onely Pro. 19. 14. Seek no match in marriage aboue thy 〈◊〉 Equalitie in marriage to be respected Of the choise of a wise A good wife is aboue all things to be craued of God by prayer Heb. 13. 4. Ephes. 5. 25. 26. 27. Three causes of marriage Psal. 51. 5. The second cause wedlocke lawfull for such as haue not the gift of chastitie The third cause This is often found most true that such as are contemners of marriage are most offenders against marriage and liue most vnchastly 21. Pet. 2. 7. By honour is meant that the husband is to sustaine and relieue the wants of his wife to support vphold beare with her infirmities as the weaker vessell Besides the prayers had with their family they must pray priuately Gen. 25. 21. 1. Cor. 7. 3. 4. 5. Col. 3. 19. Anger in a husband is a vice The roote of bitternesse to be weeded out by the spade of patience How when the husband ought to reproue Faults sometimes must be couered with loue Not to take vnkindnesse for euery trifle Ephe. 5. 25. 26 27. 28. 29. The husband is to the wife in Gods stead Husbands may 〈◊〉 be rigorous 〈◊〉 their wiues especially when they be new married Prou. 20. 3. The wife is not to be vsed or intreated as a handmaid or seruant but as a fellow Prou. 8. 7. 14 9 15. 5. 18. 2. 27. 22. Prou 9. 9. 19. 25. Gen 16. 6. The falling out of louers is a renewing of loue That man is miserable that is married vnto a foolish woman Husbands must prouide things necessarie for the house A mans house will continue by prouision before hand and by order in his expences 1. Tim. 5. 8. But where disorder is in a house it cannot endure Spare in time and spend in time for sparing is a rich purse The honour of the husband dependeth on the wife 1. Cor. 11. 7. The third point Can. 4. 9. 10. 1. Cor 9. 5. 1. Pet. 3 7. 1. Cor. 11. 3. Ephes. 3. 23. Ephes. 5. 28. 29 1. Sam. 1. 8. Gal. 6. 2. Gen. 1. 28. Gen. 2. 18. The causeswhy the husband should loue his wife The husband must loue his wiues kinsfolkes Gen. 26. 8. 9. 1. Cor. 7. 4. Duties common both to the husband the wife 1. Cor. 7. 2. Gen. 1. 18. 1. Cor. 7. 5. Ephes. 5. 15. Tit. 2. 5. Mat. 5. 44. Gen. 6. 2. Psal. 38. 22. Mat. 19. 5. Ephes. 5. 31. Gen. 31. 4. 5. c. Math. 19. 6. Pre. 2. 27. Mal. 2. 14. Mat. 19. Leuit. 20. 10. Ioh. 8. 5. Mat. 19. 8. Mat. 19. 6. 1. Cor. 7. 12. 1 Cor. 7. 11. Obiection Answer 1. Cor. 7. 29. 1. Pet. 3. 7. 1. Pet. 3. 7. Gen. 30. 1. 1. Sam. 1. Gen. 16. The best pollicie in marriage is to begin well 1. King 12. 7. 8. c. Iudg. 19. 3. Prou. 15. 1. Gal 5. 9. Gen. 22. 11. Psal. 133. 1. Leuit. 24. 5. Mat. 12. 25. Gen. 19. 33. Gen. 18. 3. Pro. 12. 4. Gen. 2. 23. Ephes. 5. 29. 1. Pet. 3. 1. Ephes. 5. 22. Col. 3. 18. 1. Cor. 7. 2. Wiues must be seruiceable obedient vnto their husbands and stand in a reuerend awe of them Ephes. 5. 24. Cheerefull in countenence Gen. 27. 9. Gen. 2. 23. 24 Math 19. 5. 1. Cor. 6. 16. Eihes 5. 31. How the wife ought to behaue her selfe vnto her husband Rom. 12. 15. 2. King 2. 6. Gal. 6. 2. 1. King 21. 5. 1. King 14. 4. Gen. 12. 1. Gen. 2. 18. 1. Cor. 1. 27. 1. Pet. 3. 1. 2. King 5. 3. 49. Hest. 7. 3. 〈◊〉 32. 21. 〈◊〉 10 19. Prou. 5. 18. 19. 1. Sam. 16. 23. 1. Sam. 25. 3. Gen. 38. 4. Gen. 33. 1. Why wiues are called huswiues Tit. 2. 5. Pro. 7. 12. 2. King 30. Gen. 18. 9. 2. King 4. 22. Ephe. 5. 22. 23. 〈◊〉 Cor. 11. 14. 34. Gen. 18. 12. 1. Pet. 3. 6. Ephes. 5. 24. Gen. 3. 1. 1. Tim. 2. 14. Num. 30. 7. Pro. 14. 1. 18. 22. 19. 14. 31. all The wife must keepe a good tongue When the wife doth hold her peace she keepes the peace The cause of domesticall combats Silence becometh a woman Lacke of knowledge of Gods word is the principall cause why wiues do not their duties to their husbands One heart and one will How the loue faithfulnesse and dutie of married folkes may be kept increased They must secretly keepe no euill will in their minds but tell their griese 1. Sam. 25. 36. 37. 1. Cor. 7. 10. 11 12. 13. 14. 15. 16. Mat. 19. 6. Mat. 19. 9. Luke 16. 18. The wife ought to obey her husband in all things that be honest and agreeable to Gods word Gen. 3. 16. Hest. 1. 20. 22. Numb 30. 7. 8 9. 1. Pet. 3. 6. It is a speciall dutie of a mother to giue her children sucke her selfe 1. Tim. 5. 10. Gen. 22. 7. 1. Sam. 1. 23. Exod. 8. Cant. 8. 1. Psal. 22. 9. Mat. 2. 14. Luke 2. 7. 12. 1. Tim. 5. 10. Stepfathers stepmothers their duties The husband must so praise his first wife she her first husband as it be not done to the offence or reproch of either to the other Iealousie which is the suspecting of adulterie in the married parties ought wisely and carefully to be suppressed in both parties without apparent matter The very name of stepfather stepmother teacheth them their dutie 1. King 12. 13. 2. Sam. 2. 7. As wiues ought to go comely plainly and handsomly in their 〈◊〉 so they must in any wise beware of pride riot or excesse therein Pride is hatefull before God and man be not therefore proud for thou art but dust ana ashes Prou. 16. 18. Titus 1. 3. Temperance in apparell The dutie containeth foure points Namely in teaching or instructing them in religion in manners good example of life and skill of an occupation The first point The children of Christians ought not to be called by any papish name We are neither better nor worse in respect of our names Iosua 10. 3. The name profiteth none in whom vertue is not conuinced Luk. 1. 59. 2. 21. Proper names are also giuen vnto vs for this vse and end that is to distinguish between man man Instructing correcting prayer make good children and happy parents Deut. 6. 7. 8 4. 9. 11. 19. Psal. 78. 5. 6. 78. Iosu 4. 6. Exod. 12. 26. 27. Gen. 18. 19. 1. 〈◊〉 28. 9. Act. 10. 2. 2. Tim. 1. 5. Parents must performe their dutie to their children moderately with great grauity and authority Which is done by example Fruits are wont to take their shape nature of the tree Deut. 6. 5. 6. 7. 31. 13. 1. King 17. 10. c. 2. King 4. 1. c. Ioh. 4. 53. Luke 19. 9. Act. 10. 44. 2. Tim. 1. 5. 3. 15. Ezech
16. 20. 21. Psal. 127. 3. See more of this point in the vse and necessity of catechizing The second point Deut. 6. 10. Exed 12. 26. 13. 14. The proper dutie of good parents to their children is to 〈◊〉 them soberly to keepe them vender obedience and to teach them good manners Prou. 23. 13. 19. 18. 19. 15. 17. 22. 15. 13. 24. 1. Sam. 2. 12. 3. 12. 13. 14. 1. Kin. 1. 5. 6. 2. Kin. 2. 23. 24 How children should be brought vp Hold thy children in awe and they shall haue thee in reuerence Prou. 30. 25. and 6. 0 7. Mat. 6. 19. sal 127. 3. lat 12. 33. Reasons Gen. 5. 3. Prou. 18. 21. 1. Sam. 9. 2. c. and. 16. 11. Psal. 78. 70. 71. 1. Kin. 19. 19. Amos 1. 2. Good manners in speech Good manners in gesture 〈◊〉 3. 1. Ioh. 2. 4. Mat. 18. 10. Esay 5. 8. Psal. 37. 35. 30. Psal. 111. 10. Prou. 9. 10. Psal. 19. 7. 8. 119. 105. Prou. 22. 6. Mat. 21. 15. 16. Psal. 82. 2 King 2. 13. 2. Sam. 16. 15. c. 1. King 1. 5. Mat. 5. 8. 1. Thes. 4. 7. Luk. 1.74.75 1. Pet. 5. 8. I am 4. 7. Pro. 18. 10. Psal. 50. 15. Prou. 1. 10. 11 Rom. 12. 2. 1. Ioh 215. Psal. 51. 5. Ephes. 2. 3. Col. 1. 12. 13. 2. Cor. 6. 1. Rom. 13. 12. Esay 14. 12. Zoph 1. 8. Gen. 6. 5. 8. 21. Mat. 15. 19. 2. Sam. 15. all 18. 35. Ill bringing vp is a cause of marring many which are of a good towardnesse and wit Two things which much hinder good education The fewer the children the more diligently to be cared for that they be well brought vp The second cause which 〈◊〉 good education 2. Sam. 18. 33. Gen. 4. 2. 25. Gen. 21. 2. Gen. 30. 24. 1. Sam. 2. 9. 2. Sam. 22. 24. Luke 1. 13. Children profit more by good example in one month then by instruction in a whole yeare Obiection Answer Zuke 3. 29. Youth must thinke on death betimes to the end to liue to well die well Marriage with Papists c. Gen. 23. 24. Gen. 2. 24. How should it marriage 〈◊〉 well whē 〈◊〉 bridegroome 〈◊〉 such a one 〈◊〉 whom he cannot say God speed because she is one of Gods friends 2. Ioh. 10. 1. Cor. 7. 39. But how do they marry in the Lord who marry the Lords enemies Gen. 6. 2. As the Iewes might not marry with the Cananites so Christians may not marry with them which are like Cananites Gen. 24. 3. 28. 1. Mal. 2. 11. Ezr 9. 14. If adulterie may separate marriage shall not idolatr y hinder marriage which is worse then it Parents may not giue their daughters to a man 〈◊〉 Gen. 34. 14. Miserable is that mā which is fettered with a woman that liketh not his religion He feareth not sinne which doth not shun occasions and he is worthy to be snared which leadeth himselfe into temptation so maketh a trap for himselfe Luk. 11. 4. The wife must be meete as God said Gen. 2. 14. But how is she meete if the husband be a Christian and sh e a Papist 1. Cor. 7. 1. Gen. 18. 1. 2. Iud. 14. 1. 2. 3. * It is the parents duty to giue their children that which may helpe them in this life to counsell or to prouide them fit and religious marriages 2. Cor. 12. 14. Gen. 4. 2. 3. 4. Ruth 3. 1. When parents do abuse their authority Parents must not match their children onely for carnall respects When parents do marry their daughters to men of vnderstanding they shall performe a weightie worke Colos. 3. 21. Parents ought to deale sincerely in the choise for their children In prouision of matches for their children parents ought to begin with prayer The third point Examples do much more perswade then words 〈◊〉 must 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 not by 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 As the father beginneth so it is like the son will proceed Gal. 6. 7. Mat. 18. 7. 1. Cor. 15. 33. The last point Gen. 3. 19. Ezech. 16. 49. Prou. 12. 11. 18. 9. 1. Tim. 5. 10. 11. 2. Thes. 3. 10. 11. Idlenesse bringeth much euill Mat. 12. 36. To learne that Science which they be most apt for Obiection Answer Pro. 3. 13. 14. 15. Why some men bring not vp their children to any good perfection in learning Luke 16. 27. Prou. 22. 6. 〈◊〉 of the eldest 〈◊〉 is athing 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Chron. 21. 3. Exod. 13. 1. 2. 34. 19. 20. Num. 3. 13. 18. 16. Deut. 21. 18. c. Gen. 35. 22. 1. Chron. 5. 1. a Eph 6. 1. 2. 3. Colos. 3. 20. b Leuit. 19. 3. Num. 12. 14. c Pro. 15. 5. 1. Tim. 5. 4. Mat. 15. 4. 5. 6 Gen. 47. 12. Fathers and mothers are to their children in Gods stead Exod. 20. 12. Deut. 5. 15. By honour is meant all kind of duty which children owe to their parents 〈◊〉 23. 39. Mat. 23. 9. 1. King 2. 19. 1. King 2. 20. Ioh. 849. 〈◊〉 9. 22. The honor due to parents Childrens dutie is from their beginning to their ending to be subiect obedient and helpfull to their parents Mat. 15. 4. 5. 6 Exod. 21. 15. 17. Leuit. 20. 9. Pro. 20. 20. 30. 17. Deut. 〈◊〉 16. What children do to their parents they do to God so that they may not purloine or diminish any of their substāce Pro. 28. 24. Mat. 7. 12. Mat. 7. 2. 1. Sam. 20. 28. c 22. 17. Dan. 3. 18. Act. 4. 19. Mat. 23. 9. When a woman loseth her honestie then hath she lost her chiese treasure Gen. 34. 12. Children may not marry without the cōsent agreement of their 〈◊〉 so that an vnlawfull promise made by the child may lawfully be broken It is a sweete wedding whē the father and the mother bring ablessing to the feast and a heauie vnion which is cursed the firs̄t day that it is knit 1. Sam. 18. 1. Contracts void without the consent of parents Children 〈◊〉 are to pray vnto God to direct their parents in a godly choyce and to 〈◊〉 their minds to accept of the same 〈◊〉 9. 22. 2. Sam. 15. 1. c. 18. 14. Deut 21. 18. 19. 20. 21. Exod. 20. 12. Ephes 6. 2. Deut. 28. 15. c. Leuit. 26. 14. c. Gen. 46 29. c. and 48. 〈◊〉 12. Luke 2. 51. Deut. 5. 16. Exed 20. 12. Ephes. 6. 2. Psal. 115. 17. 18. Esay 38. 19. Ephes. 6. 3. The housholder is called Pater Familias that is a father of a familie because he should haue a fatherly care ouer his seruants as if they were his children Maisters and Dames ought moderatly to vse their authoritie ouer theirseruants Iames 5. 4. Coloss 4. 1. Ioh 13 13. 14. 15. Deut. 24 14. 15 Mat. 8 5. 6. 〈◊〉 7. 2. God made eu ry weeke one day of rest wherein seruants should be as free as their maisters Gen. 2. 2. As the laborer which worketh but one day is worthy his hire euen so much more the 〈◊〉 that 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 eueryday Luke 10. 7. As Dauid did limit Ioab that he should not kill Absolon so God hath bound masters that they should not oppresse their seruants 2. Sam. 18. 5. Iob 31. 13. 14. 15. For a good man sauh Salemon Pro. 12. 10. will be mercifull to his beast therefore he ought to be m re mercifull to his seruants being his brethren Reuiling words and vnreasonable 〈◊〉 doth much more hurt to seruants then good 〈◊〉 16. 17. Exod. 20. 10. 〈◊〉 5. 14. 1. Tim. 5. 8. Seruants do rather imitate the works they see their maisters do then the words which they heare them speake Luke 7. 8. Ephes. 6. 9. The couetous wan in gaining riches loseth himselfe Psal. 39. 6. That which thou canst do conueniently thy selfe commit it not to another Masters ought to make good choyce of their seruants Gen. 30 26. 27. c. and 29. 2. 3. 4. 5 6. 23. 23. Esay 6. 6. It is a rare thing for a maister to bring his seruant to be godly who is not godly him selfe Reuel 5. 10. Act. 16. 31. 32 18. 8. 1. Cor. 1. 16. Ge 18. 17. 18. Phil. 11. 16. Gen. 29. Iosua 24. 15. Psal. 101. 7. Act. 10. 2. They must keepe no idle prophane superstitious nor disordered 〈◊〉 in their house Ephcs. 6. 4. Masters ought to haue a tender care of their seruants in their sicknesse Mat. 8. 5. 6. Luk. 7. 1. The wiues behauiour with seruants The maister must correct his seruants and the mistris her maids Eph 6.5.6.7.8 Col. 3.22.23.24 Tit. 2.9.10 1 Pet. 2.18.19.20.21 1. Tim. 6. 1. 2. Luk. 17. 7. 8. 9 1. King 5. 13. The property of a good seruant Gen. 29. 18. 19. 20. 39. 5. c. Gen. 16. 7. 8. 〈◊〉 Phil. 10. c. How far forth seruants ought to obey their maisters Mat. 8 9. And among seruants to helpe and ease of one another necessarie Seruants must to the vttermost of their power seek the commodity benefit of their maisters Mat. 7. 2.