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ID Title Author Corrected Date of Publication (TCP Date of Publication) STC Words Pages
A14955 The court of conscience or Dick VVhippers sessions VVith the order of his arraigning and punishing of many notorious, dissembling, wicked, and vitious liuers in this age. By Richard West.; Court of conscience. West, Richard, fl. 1606-1619. 1607 (1607) STC 25263; ESTC S106605 17,732 53

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should onely be about your worke To earne your liuing should be all your care And not by th'ale-house fire still to lurke Gaging your husbands goods for Ale and Beere You l ' sell your smocks kerchers for good cheere Get home you Mawkes from off your gossips seat Take heed of medling any more of others I le make your back your sides and shoulders sweat And ierke you till you shed your Gossips fethers Turne vp your tippet I le teach you to prate Your shoulders and my whip are falne at bate Lyers HEre comes a proper child a well fac't youth With very neat apparrell comely making Where haue you bene my child forsooth in truth I was but where my mothers maide's a baking O lying villaine all this liue-long day He hath beene with the cut-purse boyes at play What this is one of these that cannot speake Three words but two of them shall be a lie Is grace gone from you is your faith so weake To stand in falshood what 's the cause or why Or who should moue thee thus to speake the word Which can no truth nor certaintie affoord Thy credit 's crackt there 's no man that will trust thee If thou shouldst tell a thousand certaine tales All honest men abandon and detest thee Each true man cryes out and vpon thee railes They doe eschew abandon and detest A lier worse then any sauage beast Nimble tongu'd Nicholas as the Prouerbe saith He that will lie will steale but as for you I haue a whip will remedie in faith The tripping of your tongues not speaking true Vntrusse you Rascall nay a knaue so young Must learne to rule his false and lying tongue Panders Apple-squires GEntelemen Seruiters and the chiefe reteiners To old Meg Curtis and her bawdie tennants Mall Cleuelyes pages though but little gainers For in a conscience you become their seruants Onely to haue your bawdrie of free-cost Y' ar good-man of the house y' ar cald mine host You colour whordome in an antique shew You l ' walke before a whore in a blew coate Or liuery cloake your sword and dagger to Your bootes all durty in a spotted Hatte She like a country-Gentlewoman wanders After your heeles to bawdie rascals chambers And thus you liue vpon a whores reuersion Vpholding them in all their whorish doings 'T is good you should why'tis your occupation To entertaine their clients in their woings When you haue made them drunke you l ' rob them quite Of all they haue and turne them out at night O y' ar a notable and a cheting rogue who 'ld thinke your maple-face should haue it in you To rob a man and after like a Dog To lay him downe well neere a furlong from you Come you base slaue and hold your tippet vp For you shall drinke though but of a drie cup. Witches Sorcerers Coniurers and Enchanters YOu Canckred old whore you whose nose and chinne Touch one another y' ar so old and crooked when you shold mind your soules health you begin To wax vnluckie who i st that prouoked Your beldams skinne to witchcraft and such euell But euen your father Lucifer the diuell You Nigro muzell in the diuells liknes Clothed in blacke with white rod in your hand You that can coniure all the clowdes to thicknes Blustring and rayning troubling all the land Which are invested so with hellish skill You blow downe trees and houses when you will Troubling and perplexing euery creature With fiery lightnings thunderclapps and showers The heauen yet keepes them from your fiery meature And vtterly euerts your hellish powers When al your witchcrafts past and earth be shaken Dericke will trusse you vp when your are taken But ere you goe for all your last offences Vnluckines and troubling of the land Behold my whip here 's one that recompences All the whole rogry you haue tooke in hand For al your witchcrafts showers of raine thunder I thinke my whip will make your sholders wonder Beggers Idle Roges and Counterfet madmen YOu sturdy roges and harlots that doe lie Begging and crauing still at euery dore Some vpon stiltes and crouches some there be That neuer shew your selues but alwaies poore Vnder the collour of those tattred raggs You hord great summes of mony in your baggs Another sort there is among you They Doe rage with furie as if they were so frantique They knew not what they did but euery day Make sport with stick and flowers like an antique Stowt roge and harlot counterfeted gomme One calls her selfe poore Besse the other Tom. Y ar able all to serue and doe good worke Were not the rootes of rogry so enrooted Within your lazie bodies that you lurke In fields or hedges dawbed and bebooted Vp to the very eyes in durt and mire Bridewell hath often paid you for your hire But that 's a thing of nothing for y'haue fellt All the whole punishment Bridewell can yeeld I tell you iolly yongsters I haue smelt A whip out for you which you cannot shild Nor yet defend your selues by all your shiftes From tasting of his franke and liberall gifts Fooles and Flattering Maple-faces YOu whome the Lord with wit hath so endued With knowledge and perfection of skill Yet for the want of grace it is eschewed Folly embraced hauing wit at will Amongst the wise th' art holden as a scoffe To make thy selfe a foole and others laugh Th' art faine like Gnato as a fawning Curre To flatter and to sooth men for thy liuing Vp holding them in each Contrarie word Be it trew or false thy sentence thou art giuing A flatring and deceitfull tongue and lying Dispise their owne good others th' are envying Thou like a foole with coxcome motley coat Ladle and pudding and a thousand toyes Goest like a cokes an noddy and a sot Derided by a hundred little boyes O t is a proper sight to see your person In all your foolish robes and flattring fashion Come let me see how finely you can flatter To saue your Pakes and shoulder from the whip Your sides wil quake your butocks they wil clatter When you shall feele the smart I know you l skip Out of coxecomes coat and leaue your ladell The whipp for such a fooles afitter bable Crewell Masters and dames YOu crewell masters that be put in trust For bringing vp of youth in Godly feare To learne their trades in godly kind Iust The keeping of their portions all your care Whether they haue their trades or haue them not Why what care you when mony you haue got You doe deteyne that is sufficient from them In meat and drinke and other needfull things If they purloyne or steale who can condemne them T is your owne selus that youth to folly brings Yet not withstanding if they doe offend Be sure to bownce them neuer seeke to mend Or find redresse in Iustice that they leaue Their naughty kind of negligence vncarefullnes But mistris minkes your wife for sooth must haue Her pennyworth from their pates in hatefullnes Ready to beat out silly chilldrens braines If they offend but little for their paines Because misusing seruants is so good And want of needfall things that they should haue You dogged queane put of your crewell hood Your coat smock down with your hose sir knaue You shall receaue the thing the which you need My whip shall make your sides and shoulders bleed Vnconscionable and vngodly Seruants ANd you in whō bad conscience hath such root That you respect not so you haue your fills Of necessary things it makes no boote What worke you doe you Iacks and sawcie Iills In maisters absence passe the time away In loytring or in sleeping all the day Your eye-lids must be open'd you be taught To leaue your filching and such other vice Looke heere 's my whip it serueth not for naught Make ready quick I le cleach you in a trice A sounder set of slaues cannot be found T were good to whip about another round But as you like the cheere which you haue had Fall to your knaueries againe once more This gentle warning is not halfe so bad As next will be if you be on my score If you offend the next time I will haue A Tree and halter for a sawcie knaue But my desire is that we may bee friends And all the world leaue their disorder quite If you do so I le make you all amends I le breake my corde and fling away my whip Into my Iewrie you shall all be taken When you haue all your knaueries off shaken FINIS